AboutDeveloper, geek, likes pineapple, and enjoys a dabble in hacking
Joined devRant on 1/1/2017
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My mate just showed me these guys. How the fuck does that sound come out a cello?
Just asked some bloke at work if he's into computers, and he said yes.
I asked him what languages he likes.
He responds 'Linux'.
I now knew he was bullshitting, so I asked him what compiler he uses.
He said binary.
Can I rip his teeth out and make a twat-tooth necklace now?10
So I just decided I'd hotspot my phone to my laptop (as I have no WiFi) and stream a film I've wanted to watch for a while.
Turns out my shite ass mobile provider wants credit card details to prove I'm over 18.
I'm sorry, what?
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? YOU NOSY OVER CONTROLLING SHIT STAINS! THAT IS A PARENT'S JOB, NOT YOURS.
fucking hell. What is wrong with this fucking race?
Oh, and I can't torrent it because that's blocked too.9
Just got a new job.
All good, really enjoying it.
Only problem is, the canteen smells of chips and it's making me very hungry... Water for me :/9
On hold to the jobcentre, coming up to 1.5 hours now...
FUCK YOU WITH A CACTUS WRAPPED IN BARBED WIRE YOU USELESS CUMSTAIN OF A GOVERNMENT. I HAVE NO FOOD, NO HOME, AND 20% BATTERY.
SORT YOUR SHIT BEFORE I FIND EVERY SINGLE FUCKING CALL CENTRE AND FIREBOMB THEM.
fucking hell. I fucking hate this shit.8
So I've just been evicted, apparently the house I have a room in is being repossessed.
Now living in a tin hut in the middle of a field. Loving life, life loving me.10
I'm writing a website for a café and I'd like to use a new tool for generating content and managing it. Only real requirement is a SCSS pre-processor and maybe built-in Auth.
I'm thinking of moving on from LineageOS. It's pretty good on my S3, but the battery life is laughable and there's some in built features missing I'd love to have.
Maybe make my own? I have trouble finding ROMs for my phone (that I like)8
Just installed Visual Studio and Sql Server for a project on a Windows VM. Thought I'd feel comfortable as I started proper development in .NET.
I fucking hate Visual Studio and SQL Server now. The whole setup, Windows, VS, everything just feels horrible, slow, and takes ages to set up to the point you can use it.20
The police in England are utterly useless. Some of them are good, some of them try. But generally, they're a bag of shit.
I know this is random, but I can't really say any more than this and I need to rant about this shit. It's frustrating AF.9
The foul excuse for a human I live with has been blasting the fucking radio ALL FUCKING NIGHT.
I've had no sleep, he's STILL pissed out his head, and if he doesn't shut the fuck up I'm going to lock him in and burn the house down.8
Just saved my best mate's cat as it got out and got stuck under a pile of shit in her garden. Ripped my hands to shreds and spent about 2 hours on this shit.
Didn't even get a thank you. Well fuck you then.8
An old friend just texted me and asked me to hack Facebook. Again.
FUCK OFF. I'm not a fucking work-horse, I'm not a slave, and I'm not fucking with something as meaningless and stupid as FB.
Go hack your way into his neck with an axe if you want to, I'll even help, but fuck messing with their social life. Go for the disease, not the symptoms.4
Friend found a crappy netbook and asked me to set it up... With Windows 10... I'd normally tell him to boil his head, but he's a good friend.
So I told him Lubuntu or similar would be a lot better because it's got 1GB DDR2 and a Celeron. Nope, adamant on Windows.
I give in, get him a license key and install it. As I expected, it ran like shit. I showed him, he gave in and said I can install Linux.
Went for Lubuntu, he hates it and doesn't want it.
He called a pawn shop and asked how much it'd be. They said it needs Windows (?!?).
Guess what he's just asked me. Gormless twat.11
I've got a question for everyone.
I'm revamping my CV and I was thinking of lightening it a bit, but I'm not very experienced with CV's.
At my last development job, we would order breakfast cobs every Friday, and I would sort all the change out and order it etc.
Would it be wrong to add this to the end of my job history?5
That's it. I've had enough.
I lost my job yesterday (again) and the Irish cumstain who lives in the room next to me got pissed last night and kicked my door in because he thought I had his phone(?) and was ignoring him, when I was at work.
Long story short, he ripped my friends back door apart, tried to fight me (which ended with me chasing him down the street with a plank).
Police came and did a wonderful job as always by making us shake hands and 'promise' to leave each other alone.
THIS ISN'T FUCKING PRIMARY SCHOOL. DRAG HIM AWAY BEFORE I DO, YOU IGNORANT FUCKING PIGS.
Oh, and my 'friend' then had a schizophrenic episode and blamed it all on me(?!?). I then went to buy 2 bottles of vodka and decided to get pissed before trying to kill myself.
Ah, I love humans. Dirty, ignorant, blood sucking bags of sweaty meat and delicate bone. I really want to turn this Irish cunt into a skinsack of blood and guts, but I'm waiting patiently. He's going to wake up one night tied up and gagged, with me dragging him to a forest somewhere far far away...
Is it weird that I want to make him scream, cry, and shit himself at the same time?11
I've got a question for y'all.
What with Facebook's recent pig-like nature and disregard of users, I have been thinking there is a gap in the market for a better, safer social site that offers all the benefits of Facebook without the downsides.
What are your thoughts?6
I'm really thinking about saying fuck you world and going for it with my best mate.
She's funny, my kind of crazy, incredibly sweet, and drop dead gorgeous... She seems very interested too. Life might actually be picking up :D10
My mate just walked out in shorts and a really short top. Damn she's drop dead gorgeous. Wish I wasn't so fucking awkward :/18
Just found this today in the Terms for a VPN provider...
ARE YOU FUCKING JOKING?!? GO BOIL WHAT SMALL MAN JUNK YOU HAVE AND EAT IT.2
One of my friends just royally pissed me off by deciding to repeat some crap she heard on TV about suicide being very selfish. I have depression and she's just taken a huge shit on mental health I'm. She can be a stupid cow sometimes...3
I've been distro hopping for a while now, and I can't settle on one. I'm stuck using a netbook with Intel Atom and 1GB RAM right now, any suggestions for a sexy, lightweight, and feature rich distro that won't run like shit?
I've already had Xubuntu, Debian, Arch, Kali, Elementary OS, and Puppy Linux.7
I've had an idea for a possible PR. Filtering out certain categories. I don't really want to see any joke/meme rants anymore, and filtering out other types may be helpful.2