Manager: We need to setup the security in the Mexico server

Dev: You mean that 3rd party firewall add on?

Manager: Yes

Dev: And set up the billing on the Mexico account?

Manager: Yes

Dev: lol, sure thing I’ll create the ticket

Manager: What’s so funny?

Dev: Nothing

Ticket: Build wall and get Mexico to pay for it.

I have been trying to use machine learning inside an app. [more details]

"Work for me", client said, "I won't pay you but you will get some reputations for working with us" he added.

"Sorry, my body can't digest reputation", I replied.

The guy who did android dev before me in the company i work for, didn't get paid for 2 months, so he moved all the project files he worked on to an empty partition and locked the drive with Windows' BitLocker. He didn't give the password until he was fully paid. I kinda respect that guy.

A hacker deleted the despacito video from youtube.

Those are not the hackers we deserve, but the hackers we need.

Stackoverflow.

Fixed it for you

Got my hands on an interesting API.
Look around on the site.
No documentation. Like, nothing. Not even examples.
Tried calling it.
Response code: 200 OK
Body: Unknown Error.

Well, fuck you too.

"Knock Knock"

"Who's there?" 

"Knock Knock"

"Who's there?" 

"Knock Knock"

"Who's there?" 

- DoS Attack

That's a good one!

Don't we all love a sophisticated chat bot?

Stolen but...

Oh yes I know how it feels.

This is gold. This developer has a bold captcha solution.

If you hold up a UNIX shell to you ear, can you hear the C?

Most people.
"Dance like no one is looking"

Me.
"Sudo like you have backups"

My girlfriend doesn't talk to me anymore after I said I helped the new girl to do some penetration testing.

SAVAGE 😂😂😂

2 of my co-workers don't know that they shouldn't write any code after return statement of a function

Can't stop laughing.... Brilliant post...

"my app is so awesome you don't even have to close it, it crashes itself automatically. "

schrodinger's backup

Story of an IT guy 🔫

-Laughed at Gitlab the other day
-Accidentally dropped my db today.

fuck karma

"Software is like sex: it's better when it's free." - Linus Torvalds
"If free software is like Libre Office, I would rather pay for Microsoft Office. "

"Does it work in IE?"

No, and I don't care.

Why software aren't free!

You will never exit this fitness club. 😜

I have a peeeeeennn

I have some code

Uuuh

Codepen.io

I thought the antenna actually did something... nevermind