Unpopular opinnion: Whole IT industry is becoming more and more degenerative with each passing day..

Step 1: Cancel the meeting.

Nooooo you have to have GitHub stars and projects and commit history 😭😭😭😭

In 2025, JS-frameworks will outnumber humans.

"IoT is awesome~!"

"What things about it do you love?"

"Hm, hold on a second. Oh dear."

"Something wrong?"

"Just a sec. My Fridge is getting DDoS'd"

i was browsing tinder and there was a girl with a bio status that said

"if you are in IT, swipe left, get the fuck away from me"

My college internet sucks!

It was totally fine upto when they blocked facebook and other social networking sites. 😕

Then they blocked youtube! 🤧 Ok, that was fine too!

But now they've blocked Stack Overflow! WTF!! 😭😭

This is the biggest punishment for any computer engineering student.

And there's no one to complain about it!😡😡 They've also blocked Ubuntu forums and several other helping sites! And they expect us to code without using these helpers. FML

Interviewer : "Do you know SQL ?"
Me : "Yes sir. I know SQL and I prefer NoSQL."
Interviewer : "So you know SQL and you don't want to do it for our company ?? This is arrogant !! "

CW: The SQL injection vulnerability isn't important because our code is proprietary so hackers won't find it.

Me: <censored>

Had to post this...

Burned it 🔥

Big event. Massive traffic in production, so we were monitoring all night.

I was in a room with 2 devs of my team, a marketting girl, my boss and a designer... chilling.

Suddenly the production is down.

Boss: production is down, anyone can check?
Me: already on it
Dev1: it looks ok for me
Dev2: me too
Me: wait what? Impossible everything is down
Dev1: oh I refreshed the page it's not working
Me: don't stay on the page refreshing it like you are fucking monkeys. Give me useful intel or be quiet.
Market girl: is it working?
...
Guys is it working?
...
Hello?
Me: Not yet we are looking. Don't distract me.
Boss: client called us. They want it online now.
Dev1&2: he's looking
... 1 min later...
Boss: is it working?
Boss: is it working?
Boss: is it working?
Me: SHUT THE FUCK FOR FUCKING ONE SECOND. ALL OF YOU, OUT NOW. YOU ARE FUCKING MONKEYS WHO CAN'T DO SHIT. IF YOU CAN'T HELP JUST SHUT YOUR DAMN SHITHOLE. DEVS, LOOK WITH ME. MARKET GIRL PREPARE A FUCKING POST-MORTEM MAIL. BOSS GET THE CLIENT ON THE PHONE AND STALE. DO. YOUR. FUCKING. JOBS.

That's how I ended up screaming at everyone... the rest of the night went in complete silence and I fixed the issue 2min after the got quiet or busy.

Attended my first 24h+ hackathon at @cyanide's college.
Our team got a special mention for being the best all women team.
Wait.
There was just one all women team.
Fucking!
Embarassing!
Seriously!

that was quick

made my day

I got my first job as a programmer... for a salary twice as big as we had at home for four people. I'm f***ing excited!

Wish me luck :)

They can just buy a different name right ?

- Why did this rm command take 2 seconds?
- OH FUCK....

Dude! We have toilets on each floor. Why do you push shit on git?

A non-techie just asked me this, "when your computer overheats, why does it freeze?"

Warnings are red
My screen is blue
I think I just deleted
System32

This guy

Status code: 200
Content-Type: application/json
Body: {"error": true, "responseCode":400 }

WordPress has really cool features!
You can uninstall it, for example.

customer who didn't paid for 3 months: why is our server down?

me: server?. what server?.

windows update code

function update(){
print("10%");
print("30%");
print("50%");
print("99%");
_doActualUpdate();
_mineBitcoin();
print("100%");
return;
}

Admin: "Wait, I noticed unusual traffic."

Me: "What is it?"

Admin: "Looks like we have a bot here."

Me: "A bot? Didn't know we are so popular."

Admin: "It makes constantly login requests through our API, it already surpassed 600.000! I will ban it right away."

Me: "wait, that just sounds like my bot.."

Admin: "DUDE, WTF? ARE YOU SERIOUS?"

When there is bug, you don't know of, it can end up quite embarrassing.

Professor: "Who here regularly backs up all their data?"
*Some people raise their hands*
Professor: "Who has at some point lost their data?"
*The exact same people raise their hands*

Me: *Watching a movie*

Main Character: "Oh no, we have to hack the CIA to figure out how this machine works! Hacker girl, do the stuff"

Hacker Girl: "Consider it done!"

Hacker Girl: *Opens Linux bash*

Hacker Girl: *types 'mkdir Hack_CIA'

Hacker Girl: "They have two-factor authentication in place, this is going to be a hard one."

Hacker Girl: *Types 'cd Hack_CIA'*

Hacker Girl: "I'm in!"

Me: "..."

Friend: "Wow, so well done, so realistic!"

Me: *Dies*

My brain hurts just from thinking that i need to write regex