Shut that computer off and go home. You'll think clearer in the morning.

My wife wouldn't stop asking me to help her with FB. As a joke I told her if she didn't quit, I'd delete it (Tech stuff goes over her head like a 747). Well, she kept on so I opened up the Dev tools. I started by adding just some non sense to one of the divs. She saw it pop up on screen and was like "Wait...you can really do that?" then I highlighted the body tag and hit backspace. The whole thing disappeared, it was great. She legit freaked out for a minute and begged me to fix it. I popped up the console and started typing random things. Created an array with some mumbo-jumbo, a couple of quick, meaningless functions and snuck hitting Ctrl+R in there, refreshing the page. She was so happy that Facebook worked again, that she stopped asking me how to do whatever it was

I couldn’t think of a quote to do, so decided to do a function instead. Duff’s device! (You know, in case you ever wanted a scenario where fall through in a switch makes sense)

Why does apple need a Linux Kernel dev?

https://linkedin.com/comm/jobs/...

Is that a message describing windows altogether, or just the copying routines... Can't figure that one out.

I'm a python guy, and although I've worked with bash, there's always a discussion on which one is best for Linux automation.

When it comes to best security practices and clients being really concerned about it, is python that bad of a choice?

Important Abbreviations In IT security.

"I need these permissions that J has"

J has those permissions because he worked on a different team that was granted those, you do not.

"I need it"

No

"I need it"

Its not within my power to allow you access, you have to talk with R and M.

"Okay well guess what I'm gonna escalate this up thr chain and its gonna come down on you"

*sigh* what do i do when i literally have no authority to give someone something and am clearly doing my jobb right, but someone thinks they can get me... idk... in trouble? Threaten me??? Logic, meet the window

Once a guy was not able to apply for a software company coz it required 4+ years of experience in a particular API.

The problem was that he had only 2 years of experience as he himself had developed that API. 😜

It's high time that we rethink the equation " Years of experience == Skill"

Do comment your opinion.

Excel 1 Science 0

OUCH!!!!

*Developer working from home*

Dev -- Make me some coffee
Wife -- *no response*
Dev -- sudo make me some coffee
Wife -- It's not gonna work on me !!!

i am so excited about my first collaboration in 12 years! finally someone considers my capabilities as useful. now i just hope to not mess up the repo.

last time i was pair programming with my best friend, but since i moved all of this fell apart.

When you look at someone with rose-colored glasses, all the red flags just look like flags.

compile with gcc, ./a.out: "Segmentation fault (core dumped)"

compile with clang, ./a.out: runs and fails.

compile with cc, ./a.out: Alternated between "Error: Too many arguments" and "Segmentation fault"...

ffs I'm done for the week I guess.
The problem is not that it fails, the problem is that it alternates because of time of compilation, power consumption, random blody oracles or the phase of the moon in a leap year on a Friday the 13th. God.Please.Send.~Nudes~. Help.

All that patterns but you implemented only “garbage in garbage out”

tldr; devRant is great

My favorite part of devRant is I ask an opinion on a technology and so many people give me alternatives or ideas to look into and learn about instead. This is why I enjoy this community I'm always learning about new things i probably wouldn't have heard about otherwise. Or at least wouldn't have run into for a long while. Thank you all

Managers should get a pay cut every time they schedule a meeting or a phone call with an employee without mentioning what it’s about.

You know it's bad when Github finds it necessary to tell you your code is trash

It's 4:30 AM Theres a mutherfucking mosquito or whatever you call these blood-sucking-whirring bastards in your language keeping me from fucking falling asleep.

Is there a Software or Hardware olution to this

THIS FUCKING DEBUGGER IS IGNORING MY FUCKING BREAKPOINTS

GO TO HELL YOU PIECE OF SHIT

AND RSPEC: FUCK YOUR LIMITED METHOD HIT-COUNTING BULLSHIT! ONE HIT-COUNT PER METHOD FOR THE ENTIRE SPEC IS NOT GOOD ENOUGH!

FJA;KLGAKLGJFKSDHG

Javascript makes me wanna blow my fucking brains out.

Why the fuck isn't appendChild working? It shouldn't be this fucking hard to get a simple result.

p = document.createElement("p");
p.textContent = String(new Date().getTime());
doc = document.getElementById("todoList")
doc.appendChild(p);

Done from within a listener function for another element, listening for onkeyup. Using bulma.

Jesus fucking christ and this is the profession I chose.

At this rate by the time I'm fucking competent I'll be replaced by wage slaves from india who started training at the age of ten because their government actually gives a shit about investing in their people instead of saddling new generations with trillions in bank debt so goldman fucking sachs can hire more underage prostitutes from epstein and mossad.

God I wish it was legal to kill people... Taxi driver stopped outside the building.. on the street, not even parked, bur there are many empty spaces that he is also blocking - which would be another issue with these assholes during the day time..parking in the street, going to get some coffee, not the takeaway.. they sit on their fat asses and watch you struggle to park a car cuz it's a narrow street..

And now he's blasting music at full volume.. It's fucking 4 am!! 04:04!! Friggin birds aren't even up yet!!
Fuck you!! One day that it's not extremely hot here and I could actually sleep..and now I can't cuz this asshole woke me up with music.
Just die you sad excuse of a human being!!

A good parent is an informed parent!

The sorrow does not go away, one only gets used to it.

Not quite what I had in mind when I said I need a little space....

When your bugfix destroys everything

How the fuck does my boss setup 2FA using her name, and then forget that she setup 2FA even though she sees the fucking app send her a code every time she logs in. Now we need to get her to reset her password so we can get the information so another team member can access the information they need.

Since 2011, everyone in my large family lights candles on birthday cakes in binary. 1 is lit candle, 0 is just a candle. I taught them to do this. I mean you can encode years from 1 to 127 with just seven candles, so we’re using the same pack of small candles we bought in 2011.

Fuck you big candle industry. You got nothing on me.

How do I slap a blockhead who keeps interjecting me in a Zoom meeting?