C++ 101

I stole this PC so nevermind... 😑

> Manager: Why does service X behaves Y way? It should do Z instead.
> Me: *explains why*
> Manager: I don't understand this...
> Me: *explains it in more simple terms and shorter sentences*
> Manager: I'm still not sure I get it.
> Me: It is like this because of a third party provider and we can't change anything for the same reason. Also it is working like this for half a decade now.
> Manager: Ok, I get it. So please fix the service, it should do Z instead of Y.
> Me: *facepalm* Sorry, I can't. Ask (frontend guy), maybe he can help you.
> Frontend guy a bit later: ┌П┐(ಠ_ಠ)

When it’s 2:30AM and your brain won’t shut the fuck up about all the ideas you want to try

Type T ( something something... )
...
Type * TP = T;
TP.do()

> Be me
> Production code
> Update Type structure
> SEGV
> Wtf why was this even working
> Ask senior
> senior y u do dis
> bc
> Why were no errors
...
> mfw
> He says

"I added -fpermissive and forgot..."

On production since May

...

...

...

... 2007

Ever typed something, checked again, posted it and days later realized there is a typo despite your second check and autocomplete? 😒😒😒

Super trivial but who ships a laptop to a new employee with random software on that is clearly for their own preferences? I don't use classic shell, I don't like classic shell, and it hugely fucked with both my opinion of the new place (an IT company, ffs) and my estimation of the person who configured it. Do whatever shit you must on your own machine but get out of my way and let me use the fucking os without more pointless shit! I wouldn't do this to you, no matter how much I might love some obscure additional layer for primarily nostalgic reasons. Raging!

Unreal, Y U DO DIS? :'(

*Runs MySQL benchmark on a new server*
Result: 30 read queries a second.
*Hmm.... that can't be right...."
*Creates simple node benchmark script and runs it*
Result: 400-500 read queries a second.

Wtf mysql...

*flashback to days of windows xp*
Just finished formatting and installing xp on friend's trash pc cuz the os was compromised due to a shitload of viruses. Notice that other partitions might still be infected and i don't have an antivirus on me.
"Big boi Ill be back in an hour, just whatever you do, don't open ANY drives no matter how urgent it is. Just Don't do it or i won't be able to help you"

Come back and VIOLA this worthless trash avocado opened a drive to play a game and d pc was infected. Again. Back to square one. It almost broke my heart. Almost.

I remember that day well. I was 15yo and hopeful. That day marks d start of my hatred toward tech incompetent people.
SO FKIN
A N G E R Y

So today
College
My classmates stink of incompetence. I'm not that smart in fact i consider myself to be a noob among devs but seeing ppl that are several order of magnitudes trashier than me breaks my heart and makes me soo Fkin

A N G E R Y

Hey you cunt of a skunk, WHY can't you even compile a fkin cpp file without an IDE what the fuck is wrong with you? What do u mean ur program isn't compiling? Well it literally says there syntax error on line 15 congrats u moron u fkin spelled else as esle. Why shud I waste my time on stupid Shitty ppl like u huh?

And waddup mr shithead.No. Not gonna help you partition ur drives and install a fkin linux just cuz ur too lazy to google it urself.
And if i refuse to help cuz im working on my shit then I AM D BAD GUY? Stop bitching about me u lazy bastards get ur lazy arse off and read the fkin book. Watch a tutorial or sm shit why the fuck can't u understand YOU LITERALLY PAY TO COME HERE AND YOU AREN'T EVEN TRYING TO LEARN THE BASICS GOOD LUCK GETTING A JOB YOU WORTHLESS CUNTS.

Now now all the poison is out i can finally focus on improving myself and stop giving a fuck about them. Its hard to be calm and cool when ur surrounded by ppl like this all day. Even harder when there is almost noone that you can look upto. All this time, there's only one thing I've learnt- in a place like dis, being an asshole is better dan being polite.

When your technical director tells you that he prefer notepad++ over phpstorm.

(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻

bought a windows license
built the pc
booted from usb
ask for license, put in bought license
installation seems normal
... windows isn't activated ... what?? how?? why is there a different key from the one i just entered?? and why does it still deny it when i try to change the key to my bought one?? y u do dis?😩

does anyone have an idea, what could be causing that?

I JUST SPENT A PAINFUL TWO HOURS TRYING TO FIND OUR WHY MY EXCEPTIONS WERE BEING THROWN AFTER EVERY SINGLE INPUT THE USER ENTERED...

I commented out the try catch, it worked, I commented out the throw and it worked, so I uncommented them both and it worked again? WHY DIDN'T IT WORK BEFORE Y U DO DIS

This made me lel

I automatically heard Stallman's ramblings regarding what it should be named :P

I call it the Stallman Screech

So I was like "imma be smart with my internet security and put 2 factor on my GitHub" only to find out I'm getting authenticating errors on trying to push. Disabling 2FA makes it work again.

GitHub y u do dis D:

Fren: yo check this IC out

[blinks]

"Okay, s-"

[suddenly bitch ass contraption squirts milk on my face]

[bitch ass fren runs]

,w, <(motherfucker y u do dis)

Be me. Use DDG to search for nearby bowling alleys. DDG provides reviews in form of Yelp. Click "read more" on review. Yelp transfers me to a bogus url, which prompts

"Open in Another App?

Would you like to leave DuckDuckGo to view this content?

No Yes"

And then, without letting me click "No", I get automatically transferred into Yelp's page in the app store, and if I try to go back, I just get redirected again.

Fuck off. I just wanted to read your reviews in the browser. I had no interest of downloading your app just to read a couple of reviews, and I most certa-fuck-inly have no desire to download your shitty app now.

compiler, y u do dis? T^T

Programmer friend: Dood, do this and this and show it to me, I'll say if it's good.
Me (noob): Okay, sure.

*next week*

F: So why did you stop coding?
M: Why do you think so?
F: You didn't show me your project in a week.
M: I was lazy?
F: LAZY?!?!

Joomla ffs

Why is every dev obsessed with dark themes? I feel like I NEED to like them as well to fit in. :/

sooo I've been hanging around devrant for a while, and well..... it's been obvious af that Javascript has been getting a lot of hate lol. so I was wounding if somebooday could enlighten me with a "why". y u do dis ppl?

I fucking killed my hard drive by installing the guest additions in a Windows VM! Everything freezed and crashed suddenly, how the hell is that possible? How can Windows fuck everything up, even in a VM??
(Probably wasn't Windows fault, that makes me even more angry).

This hard drive wasn't even two months, his predecessor died heroically in a tragic magnet incident :(

Gah. So i replaced my Laptops HDD with an SSD. So far, so cool, but in the process i fucked up the keyboard. Its one of those that kinda click into place. Frames broken in one or two spots and there's a chunk missing at the top. I mean, it still works fine, but it looks ugly where the chunk is missing and the left side feels a bit too soft. And a new keyboard with German Layout would cost almost 70€ (English layout only 30€ WTF!) LENOVO, Y U DO DIS!

What do you say when you see a mysql_connect in the middle of index.php ? die();

Im trying to modify responsive css table so it would include block elements in it and render properly.
In angular-material.... in custom directives.....

I made css hell for myself... Fml

Has anybody else had problems with gmail? It seems that some of my emails are not being received, even though it says they have been sent.