I am sorry

I just installed Microsoft Edge on Linux

I am so sorry

Fuck these super social media instagram influencer developers telling everyone watching their story that "everyone can be a programmer.". You can't. It's not only about syntax and a run button.

Backend devs should see this: https://youtu.be/y8OnoxKotPQ

Had a dodgy stomach. Muted the mic & let out an almighty fart.

Only, as you'll have guessed (and I quickly guessed from the silence that followed), I'd missed the mute button.

Designer: can we put the popup at the top of the screen?

Me: You mean op top of the navigation?

Designer: Yeah.

Me: I sure can. Would be stupid to block off the site navigation with a popup, but definately possible.

Designer: Cool, let me know when done!

Me: ....

Me: I am done.

Designer: Well now I can't click on the navigation anymore.

Me: That's correct. Let me know when you want to change it again.

When you realize that you're googling an error message you've implemented yourself

Customer: IT is completely useless! I’m getting PORN ADS on my work computer!? This is ridiculous!!!

Friend: Oh that’s not good, perhaps your computer has a virus of some sort let me take a look!

Friend takes a look and sees that the porn ads were all provided by google ad service, they weren’t related to a virus.

Friend: so, you don’t have a virus, but so that you know google gathers metrics on the sites you visit so that it can target ads at you better. Looks like that’s what’s happening here.

Customer: .............

Alexa (in another room): ***ALARM***
Me: Hey Google, broadcast "Alexa, stop"
Alexa: ***stops***
Me:

Every job interview question ever

whatever man

alright man thats enough

After countless hours trying to spell my name for customer service over the phone, I made a little webpage that helps me spell words phonetically! 💬

https://dialogue.now.sh

Too much work kills your brain cells.

Got informed that there is a bug in production that needs to be addressed on top priority.

Me opens Android studio to check.

Android studio: chill bro

Should I get my new domain for 12 months or 1 year? Decisions, decisions...

ms sql server may be the worst piece of software I've ever worked with.

😂😂😂

They call it $5/gb hotel wifi, i call it free uncapped 100meg fibre because your security sucks

Oh and they host their entire POS (and database with backups) on the same network accessible to every TV in the hotel

Ian Murdock, Debian creator, dead in shady circumstances this day, three years ago.

A days before we’ve seen some very strange tweets by him about the police violence, and then his Twitter was immediately gone. But internet remembers everything.

Good night sweet prince.

https://pastebin.com/dX3VSPkM

What a fucking scam. Unacceptable.

!rant Decided to use the DevTools audit thing to try to improve my personal website. An embarrassing number of hours later and I finally have to tell the perfectionist in me to chill.

1 . Seen it
2 . Mind blown
3 . Why i didn't thought of that
I loveee the ideea

serverless

What's wrong with this developer. I know at some point Eclipse was king, so you better stop playing with peoples emotions, lol 😅.

Drunk me coding.
Next day: WTF, dude…?

Senior Engineer -
Hey. I have a code that hits API to get details and multithreading is implemented. Can you just change the URL formed to hit Api?

Me
Yeah sure why not.

Me
After some time I discover that the initial code itself wasn't working 😐
I realise i need to fix code, fix multithreading and then make the URL changes.

Just finished......Realised had to rant....

Your move, human...

A dev posts a link to his website on a dev group I admin, first thing said site does is ask for my location. I look, no map not logically apparent reason for it, so I close the site.

Ask they guy why he is asking for such private info and he responds to tell me that he does not think a person's exact location is that private, and if he really wanted it he would just use the IP address.

Like how many fucking levels of dense is that.

If you're going to look for junior devs on facebook... make sure you don't try to be funny and write any kind of bullshit-code.. there is a f**king space in the function name! Dude....

Text says:
"Rieke Computersysteme is looking for you!

void send Application () { ... }"

I'd do this soon to piss the professor off