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Search - "new year resolution"
I absolutely HATE "web developers" who call you in to fix their FooBar'd mess, yet can't stop themselves from dictating what you should and shouldn't do, especially when they have no idea what they're doing.
So I get called in to a job improving the performance of a Magento site (and let's just say I have no love for Magento for a number of reasons) because this "developer" enabled Redis and expected everything to be lightning fast. Maybe he thought "Redis" was the name of a magical sorcerer living in the server. A master conjurer capable of weaving mystical time-altering spells to inexplicably improve the performance. Who knows?
This guy claims he spent "months" trying to figure out why the website couldn't load faster than 7 seconds at best, and his employer is demanding a resolution so he stops losing conversions. I usually try to avoid Magento because of all the headaches that come with it, but I figured "sure, why not?" I mean, he built the website less than a year ago, so how bad can it really be? Well...let's see how fast you all can facepalm:
1.) The website was built brand new on Magento 22.214.171.124...what? I mean, if this were built a few years back, that would be a different story, but building a fresh Magento website in 2017 in 1.x? I asked him why he did that...his answer absolutely floored me: "because PHP 5.5 was the best choice at the time for speed and performance..." What?!
2.) The ONLY optimization done on the website was Redis cache being enabled. No merged CSS/JS, no use of a CDN, no image optimization, no gzip, no expires rules. Just Redis...
3.) Now to say the website was poorly coded was an understatement. This wasn't the worst coding I've seen, but it was far from acceptable. There was no organization whatsoever. Templates and skin assets are being called from across 12 different locations on the server, making tracking down and finding a snippet to fix downright annoying.
But not only that, the home page itself had 83 custom database queries to load the products on the page. He said this was so he could load products from several different categories and custom tables to show on the page. I asked him why he didn't just call a few join queries, and he had no idea what I was talking about.
4.) Almost every image on the website was a .PNG file, 2000x2000 px and lossless. The home page alone was 22MB just from images.
There were several other issues, but those 4 should be enough to paint a good picture. The client wanted this all done in a week for less than $500. We laughed. But we agreed on the price only because of a long relationship and because they have some referrals they got us in the door with. But we told them it would get done on our time, not theirs. So I copied the website to our server as a test bed and got to work.
So I show their developer the changes and he's stunned. He says he'll tell the hosting provider create a new server set up to migrate the optimized site over and cut over to, because taking the live website down for maintenance for even an hour or two in the middle of the night is "unacceptable".
So trying to be cool about it, I tell him I'd be happy to configure the server to the exact specifications needed. He says "we can't do that". I look at him confused. "What do you mean we 'can't'?" He tells me that even though this is a dedicated server, the provider doesn't allow any access other than a jailed shell account and cPanel access. What?! This is a company averaging 3 million+ per year in revenue. Why don't they have an IT manager overseeing everything? Apparently for them, they're too cheap for that, so they went with a "managed dedicated server", "managed" apparently meaning "you only get to use it like a shared host".
So after countless phone calls arguing with the hosting provider, they agree to make our changes. Then the client's developer starts getting nasty out of nowhere. He says my optimizations are not acceptable because I'm not using Redis cache, and now the client is threatening to walk away without paying us.
So I guess the overall message from this rant is not so much about the situation, but the developer and countless others like him that are clueless, but try to speak from a position of authority.
If we as developers don't stop challenging each other in a measuring contest and learn to let go when we need help, we can get a lot more done and prevent losing clients. </rant>14
Bored af last week,
It's almost the end of January,
Realized I don't have any resolution this year,
Impulsively ordered a new wacom intuos pro,
Then made this using my old bamboo tablet while waiting for the new one,
2020 resolution - learn to draw again16
"Do you like your job? I mean, all those collored lines in that funny font... sitting at the desk with this adorable rubber duck... Do you guys jus".....
Me: "SHUT UP YOU STUPID ASSHOLE!!! I MADE 26 COMMITS DURING THIS FUCKING DAY, THE DAY THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE LAST WORKING DAY OF THIS SHITTY YEAR! I HAVE NOT SLEPT AS I SHOULD AT ALL CAUSE THIS FUCKING MIGRATION OF NEW YEAR'S UPDATE AND NOW... AHH NOW YOU STUPID FYCKING PSYCHO... NOW I HAVE TO CONTROLL MYSELF DURING NEXT DINNER WITH FRIENDS, HAVE NO MUCH ALCOHOL CAUSE DURING SUNDAY, EVEN ITS A FUCKING HOLIDAY AND EVEN IF I AM IN A LOOONNGG HANGOVER, I DO STILL NEED TO COMPLETE THIS FUCKING NEW YEAR MIGRATION YOU ASS PUNK! GO FUCK YOURSELF YOU LITLE USELESS TINY LITLE SHIT!!!"
And this is how I see my new years resolution: the time is priceles doing this questions to me...
Happy new year, fellazz! 💃🎆🎉2
I have finally decided on my new year's resolution.It is -
Yup , I'm gonna change my wallpaper resolution to 2560×1440 starting this year.
Me: My new year resolution is to actually make my github page
Friend: eeh, wasn't it your resolution last time?
Me: well, it...3
My new year resolution: 3840 X 2160
PS: don't give me a hard time in the comments. I know it's an old joke. 😫5
I published an app around half a year ago and was confused why a lot of people were uninstalling within a few days. The app looked and worked amazing on my device.
Recently I got a new phone with a better resolution so I naturally installed my app.
The layout is actually shit and barely anything makes sense!
We want to improve the portal by making apps for it what can you do or recommend?
Well holy shit this is new you're actually asking the dev team for advice on a future project.
Normally you immediately go to a third party waste a shit ton of money and then tell us we have a week to add whatever it is into our system.
Then when we can't do it or have to delay other projects you're dragging our manager into a meeting with the CEO complaining that IT are refusing to cooperate or are holding up the project etc.
The change of heart is much appreciated but where the fuck did this come from? New year resolution?5
My new years dev resolutions are:
-Learn more c#
-Read less reddit while on the clock
-Remember that the index on enums start at 03
My next year's resolution is not to make more geeky jokes however my current resolution will remain 1920 x 1080 for a while.
My first new year resolution for this 2017 is learn to do the f****ng unit test before implement the code3
Hello fellow people,
though I'm normally just a lurker, I want to take some time to make some new years resolutions I probably won't follow after a few days, but I do have some small goals I hopefully can achieve.
1. Hopefully not regretting to post this. I get kind of anxious when I think about someone I know could see this. I'm fairly new to this site, so I really don't know what's going to face me.
2. Getting my mental health on the right track.
I could do so much more if I wouldn't be as... occupied with uncomfortable thoughts as of right now, such as feeling as if I am not able to do what I want to do because I'll never achieve anything so why even trying... I want to change that, because I'd be more able to do things I want to do; to have more energy for uni because that's what I originally wanted to do. study computer science because it was and probably is still fun to me. finding the motivation I've had a few months ago.
3. With that follows... trying new things; starting a project and hopefully finishing it.
I don't know. I normally don't do these kind of new years resolution things, but I took this small opportunity, even if it is just for me, to write it down.
Here's to... another chaotic year, as always. But better chaos. I don't know... why am I doing this? This page wasn't meant for this or was it? I'm confused now. I'm sorry if this bothered anyone ^^'10
New Year resolution 2018:
Actually read / pass at least 2-3 of the 100+ books/courses on professional topics that I bought in 2017.
And stop buying stuff I don't use.3
Rant r = new Rant(Rant.TEAM_PROBLEM);
Three months ago, a senior, one year older than me, decided to join me in doing startups. He said he's good at finance stuff (his parents are fund managers), and he is interested in startups just like I am. He treated me very nicely, so I gladly accepted him.
I'm currently working on many projects, and some of them won me quite a few awards, most notably on the national competition. I also got invited into startup incubator programs, met some awesome people and offered free scholarships at universities in my country.
He frankly said he joined because he wanted to learn about startups and have those "privileges" too, and I'm cool with that.
Anyway, the problem is that I'm the one doing all the work. He's really nice, doesn't claim anything whatsoever, but the thing is he doesn't have any skills whatsoever except soft skills like communicating. So, I'm horribly tired from working alone.
My tasks mostly involves full-stack development, such as planning the specs, designing and developing frontend for mobile apps and progressive webapps, developing microservices for the backend, up to deploying and maintaining the servers. It's a lot of work for a single person to handle in such a short timeframe.
Not only that, but I'm also the one handling the business/marketing part, albeit I'm still learning. From doing paperworks, pitches, business models, up to creating advertising materials for the product.
I'm obviously not the smart ones like the people out there, but I keep focusing on improving my skills.
So, he said he could help me, and I let him try. What did you think he did?
He made pitch decks using default fucking PowerPoint themes, shooted a demo video with his phone cam in 320p potato resolution and expect me to "add some effects", gives me loads of requirements when all we needed was a simple feature, copying and pasting prior documents in my paperworks which doesn't make any fucking sense at all, and quite a lot more.
Also, he said I should stay in the developer zone only while he maintains the business, whilist he obviously can't do much in the business part either. Seriously...?
I'm okay with his lack of experience, considering he's nice and all, unlike the other business guys I've met in the previous rants. However, I keep questioning myself why he is here in the first place when I'm the one doing everything anyway.
What should I do? Maybe just keep him and recruit more experienced people to join us, as he's not that much of a burden? What do you devRanters think?
Thanks for reading, fellow devRanters! 😀8
So which are you new year's resolutions?
Learn C,C++ and Node
Organize my time to do more with it
God damn it. I have not ranted enough this year. I need to ramp up my rant game. This could be my new years resolution.
guess what - it’s my anniversary of first joining devRant. I joined exactly 0x16d days ago, and it’s been great.
ive learnt so much, made more stuff, and y’all are great.
id like to follow up on my resolutions from last year ( https://devrant.com/rants/364344/... ), and im proud to say i did everything except the 3d game (i was looking opengl and got distracted by opencl).
when i first saw devRant, i was on a plane, coming home. i saw a news article and decided to check it out, and when i joined i quickly realized i was the second youngest on the platform. one year, 316 rants, 2181 comments, and a score of 18594++ later, here i am.
thanks for this wonderful platform!20
I want to program everyday for a whole year because I want to use the programming knowledge that I learned and use it in ways that will make me think outside the box. Hopefully, I can grab freelance work as a Web Developer, which has been in high demand these past few years.
I'll be documenting the process on my YouTube channel, which I'll share when I publish the first video.
I will NOT procrastinate... I WILL DO THIS!!7
My plan/resolutions for 2018?
Have at least 1 commit per day w/ maybe exceptions like special holidays and such 😁
(No commits just to have a commit like adding a line of commentary or stuff like that)
What's your new year resolution(s) for 2018?
What do you like about devRant?
Which area do you think devRant can be improved?
// I got asked those questions last night at one of the project dinner.
// So now I am asking you guys here.
// I have replaced the project name to devRant for us.
// My answers in comment.3
My 2018 goals:
1. Graduate from the Deep Learning Nanodegree.
2. Get better at Python.
3. Learn C++.
4. Learn more about Machine Learning and AI.6
My New Years Resolution is to actually get back into programming.
I may be the president of the computer science club, but I have not programmed on my own, just to refine my experience and not my theory in a very long time. I really hope that next year I will resume my old hobbies.
Plus does anyone have a good slogan for my club? I am trying to advertise it, since only one other person attends it. PLZ help.2
Wish you devRant family a very happy new year, my new year resolution for the year finally start working on my side project which I have been rolling off for the last 2 years, this is the year I finally start and finish it off.
As the year comes to a close and I begin my challenge, what are some tips that you guys recommend I do?4
New year resolution: resume a personal project I put aside for the last 5 years, and keep at it for a while.
5/6 years ago I was pissed that no mobile game uses touch interface to detect "spells" being drawn on the screen and decided to have a go at it. I remember a game of the 90s doing that with the mouse, which was super cool at the time.
I had a working (but ugly) game, but the last 20% to publish the game was more than my motivation allowed at the time and I let it rot.
Let's see if I can get it done this time.3
1) Release code generator project “Accio”, that I almost finished implementing in the last year. Need to do some minor refactoring, add minor features and then write documentation which probably will take the most time.
2) Again, finish a side-project I started last year, which is a TV ambilight with a camera in front of the screen.
3) After finishing the 2nd, I would like to pick up a new side-project and implement MVP, which pontentially could grow into an indie business.
4) Would like to start a dev blog, though I had this resolution for the last 5 years already, so don’t know if this year is going to be any different. On the other hand, finishing first 2 resolutions would give me quite some topics to write about.
5) And specifically for October, would like to contribute and get hacktoberfest t-shirt.
Then some that are not dev related:
- Participate in my first MTB race
- Read a single book per month
- Learn dutch, as I live in the Netherlands for quite some time already.
New Year Resolution:
Keep my files organised. Thinkpad laughed at me saying how about finishing last year's resolution of keeping your Desktop organised.
Me: F**K it
New year resolution was to be a better person (or at least nicer) but here it goes.
Monday rant: State your fucking requirements when requesting something as "This is not what I was expecting" is not acceptable.
I do code for living I don't read mind nor have a crystal ball on my desk telling me "...what you meant..."
Happy new year!
Resolution for us all:
Pick up new skills, dedicate 1-2 hours a night to our studies. Let’s get it this year devs! Let’s kill some projects and let’s get that moneeeeeeey!!!!! $$$$$$
New Year Resolution..
Discussion on random topic
Read a new topic at least in a day
Build something interesting
My New Years resolution is to learn at least one new language.
Post what you think I should learn and I will give you a language to learn this year.
My new year resolution as a dev:
1. Competing in Kaggle competitions
2. Motivate peoples in data science
3. Do some cool project
4. Waiting for devRant stickers..
Anyone else planning to raise buried projects from their grave on New Year's Eve....? :P
P.S.- might come with a resolution or two while at it!1