When a hiring manager wants 5+ years experience in Swift.

Swift release date = June 2, 2014

😂👍🖕

My girlfriend dumped me after I named a class after her. She felt I treated her like an object.

"A different error message! Finally some progress!"

A young guy I work with burst into tears today, I had no idea what happened so I tried to comfort him and ask what was up.

It appears his main client had gone nuts with him because they wanted him to make an internet toolbar (think Ask.com) and he politely informed them toolbars doesn't really exist anymore and it wouldn't work on things like modern browsers or mobile devices.

Being given a polite but honest opinion was obviously something the client wasn't used to and knowing the guy was a young and fairly inexperienced, they started throwing very personal insults and asking him exactly what he knows about things (a lot more than them).

So being the big, bold, handsome senior developer I am, I immediately phoned the client back and told them to either come speak to me face-to-face and apologise to him in person or we'd terminate there contract with immediate effect. They're coming down tomorrow...

So part my rant, part a rant on behalf of a young developer who did nothing wrong and was treated like shit, I think we've all been there.

We'll see how this goes! Who the hell wants a toolbar anyway?!

Shut up and take my money

I want to stop charging my e-scooter at around 85% because this will increase the battery life. To avoid always having to pull the plug at the right level, I made a stop circuit that goes between charging brick and e-scooter.

There's no processor involved, just a CMOS 555 used as inverting Schmitt Trigger which controls a power mosfet. Also two status LEDs and a start switch. The poti adjusts the cut-off level. Worked on first try, with only manual voltage and tolerance calculations beforehand!

Actual pic of a 10x engineer: does a force push as a safety measure, ends up blowing up the whole repository.

what a gem i found on the side of screen while viewing stack overflow :https://meta.stackoverflow.com/ques...
Long story short, a teacher gave a sassy reply to his student's question , the answer got viral on reddit and SO admins are going bonkers 😂😂

"I learn really fast and almost never need to look at the documentation."

@matvelloso on Twitter

Python - Java

Wtf is going on with developers these days?
I just applied for a job (through some online job thing) for the holidays and they had questions like "Do you have relatives working for our company?" and I'm like noooo. So when I wanted to submit the form the field of my relatives name working for the company was marked with a notice "pls fill me in". And that was not the only field behaving like that. There were like 10 of them.

So now I wanted to install mono develop to learn some c# and gui development and they give me this

Minimum punishment it is

Just logged in to my old Bitbucket account.
It's a huge cemetery of side projects..
Some of them are unknown now..
Some others were glorious..
And some of them were killed by other projects, loosing the war of side projects..

RIP my old projects.. RIP

Boss throwing up a huge source code that I didn't see before.

Boss: Hey, this is an app from a contractor to do XYZ.

Me: Oh, okay.. so?

Boss: You will continue the code and the maintenance now. How much time do you need to implement X feature?

Me: I need to see the code first, can't say nothing now.

Boss: ok I need estimation now.

Me: *getting nervous* I need to see the fuckening code first. if you want estimation now I would say one year..

Boss: what?

Me: what?

My office has blocked access to all external websites. Only internal, self-hosted sites under our domain work.

P E A K. S E C U R I T Y.

Hey devs! I'm new here and I don't know any people on this network, wanna talk about things?

refreshing the tab also works

Dear Web Developers,
I say this on behalf of most of the people(I think) that nobody at any want of life wants something to play automatically on a website. Seriously, I would rather you use my browser to mine cryptocurrencies than use my speakers.

I taught myself programming in 1999, spent two months writing simple ad tracking script in php

I still earn about 1500/ month from it.

Those were the good old days

Last Friday a coworker asked me what a Singleton is.

He graduated 3 years ago.

I think we have to improve our hiring process.

it can be the most interesting article in the world, but if you ask me to confirm cookies, to enable notifications and to disable my adblock or subscribe to your aWeSoMe newsletter at the same time I'm not interested in spending any more time on your site

oh and also, FUCK YOU, return your degree, resign and FUCK OFF

External company HR: We are sorry to hear you've decided to turn down our offer. You made a great impression and we thought you'd be a good fit. If you change your mind please let us know.

Me: I too am sorry you didn't tell me you were moving to the other-side of the county in two weeks, making it impossible for me to travel to and from work. I too have feelings about having done all the interviews and this being the end result. Thank you

Android Studio got you! 😂🔥

For the people that got a bachelor degree. What was your bachelor thesis about?

Hmmmm... a new one-Exciting

Currently getting into Machine Learning and working on a joke-project to identify the main programming language of GitHub repositories based on commit messages. For half of the commits, the language is predicted correctly out of 53 possible languages. Which is not too bad given the fact that I have no clue what I'm doing...

Those faceless devs are a little bit creepy 😮

It's rewind time! 😂