When the company puts a 2 week freeze on all prod updates for the holidays , but still makes you show up for work (with nothing to do). 😭

Not really giving a f*ck about pagespeed and lighthouse reports.

And overthinking styles…

Our company Nerf wars got a little rowdy one year, and a co-worker knocked over a (senior citizen) co-worker just to “win”. Like full on take down body slam. So much for no physical contact.

Do you ever feel like some days are so damn monotonous? I’m nearing 10 years in the industry and lately my world consists solely of Plug-in development, templated or basic sites, PRs, and documentation galore. How do y’all keep your brain from turning to pure mush? Learning anything cool/new? The Burn out is real. 😖

When your product team doesn’t properly test before launching a new feature. 😂

In 2019 I want to get better at PHP & React & stop being afraid to try & fail! I do a lot of front end work, backend still baffles me a lot. Time to get uncomfortable! 👩🏼‍💻🤓

Microsoft seems to get progressively worse every year. My work transitioned from google products (email, drive, chat) to Microsoft & it was a humungous step backwards. Everything crashes & doesn't save. Edge sucks. Windows 10 sucks. IE always sucked. Office 365 sucks. One drive sucks. MS Teams sucks. 😑

Let's see here, we have:
🤡 Creepy Cackle Guy: watches videos all day and cackles like a hyena, plus constantly farts, and complains a lot. He gets everyone gassed up, no pun intended.

😤Bitchy PM: argues with you about every little thing, lies to pad her metrics while screwing the dev's metrics over. Also lies about what clients say to force launch or what she feels client should do. Rude to clients & co-workers. Runs and tattles to higher ups when people call her out on her shit. Nobody can stand her, she get's the entire office upset.

🙉Darth Vader: I don't think this one needs explaining. He breathes SO freaking loud you can hear it across the room. He also won't talk to anybody. Ever.

🤐The Non-Stop Flapper: nice person, but chats you non stop about their mundane life events, even when your status is set to busy or they know you're swamped. Asks irrelevant questions all day, every day. Heart of gold but needs to reel in the chatting.

🤬 Mr.Rage: whines about EVERYTHING. I mean everything. Has also thrown his food on me once over a joke about pizza. Wants to move up to programming but cant program.
---
So between them all, I scream on the inside daily. 🙊😫😢

My worst experience with a designer was when one forgot to design the website mock up for 2 weeks... so I just did it myself. Thankfully I have a degree in both development & design and bullshited my way through it. We were swamped at the time so I wasnt too thrilled to be doing his job. He somehow still has a job here, even though he's lazy and his mockups suck. 🤐😵👎

My supervisor once said he had a dream about me in the bathtub (after getting his teeth pulled and being on pain killers). Still was creepy none the less, like I didn't need to know. Lol.

Ideal dev job would be to work on pretty/girly fashion or cosmetics websites, have drama free and knowledgeable co-workers, decent salary, great organization, external training opportunities, cute modern office, dogs, cats and a cafe on site, a dope recharge room & no talking to clients ever.

My headphones. World off, music on.

I'm a perfectionist and like things done the right way, but had to learn to let go and remind myself it's the clients site and their choice. No amount of logic and reasoning is going to stop a hellbent client from wanting the dumb things they want, even when it's bad for design, performance, usability and/or SEO.

My dev super power would be to read client's minds before a design call and eradicate their stupid ideas for a website that make absolutely no sense. Save us all a headache.

One day a client sent me gifts and a sweet letter just because they loved their new website so much. I just about cried. I work in an industry where acknowledgment and thankfulness by clients are extremely rare. 😱😭

!Rant
Thought this was kind of funny for us lady devs/programmers, and something we can relate to.

The lady in the image is an engineer/programmer and is getting married but doesn't have any girlfriends (since she works in a mostly male oriented field, like us). So instead of having female bridesmaids she had her close brogrammers / college classmates stand up in her wedding with her. I mean, it was probably less drama, anyways! 😂

I'm the only girl on my team so I def relate!

*not my pic*

We had a mega rude, pompous asshat client come in who's company was SO disliked that someone made a hate site about them that was out ranking the client's actual site. They hired us to re-do their site and SEO to try to get back to the top results. We redid the site but we didn't improve the SEO. We also visited the hate site so many times we probably improved their ranking. 😂🖕🏻

Idea for Weekly Rant - What have you developed that you're most proud of?😁

Idea for Dev Rant in General - Ability to add and message friends. Groups or Communities to join and chat. 👫

!Rant
Yassss 🙌🏼 I'm dying. Your dog 🐶😂🤣

"Get your devRant custom cartoon avatar on stickers! We can now print glossy sticky-back 1.75" (4.5cm) circles of your personalized avatar to place on your laptop, your refrigerator, your dog, wherever!"
@dfox genius

My JavaScript professor once thought my work was "too good" and decided to pull me aside, in front of the class, to practically accuse me of cheating. I had to meet her in her office after hours and talk to pretty much prove it. Once she realized I didn't cheat she was fakey nice the rest of the semester. God forbid a girl be decent at JavaScript without "cheating". 🙄

If only this button could make this shitty work week end & launch me in to paradise. I've had it up to here with PMs, clients, sales and stupid people. Any one else? 😖🙋🏼👋🏼

The most fun I've ever had coding was creating a hidden object game in school (with Flash/ActionScript3). I even had a dude do voiceovers, it was dope! I would love to learn more gaming development but no time. :(

Front End Web Dev 💻 I've dabbled in game development and wish I had more time for it. 🎮

How do you guys deal with really stupid PMs? I had one ask me 3xs to call the client and send emails because he's lazy and doesn't know how to be a PM + he's dumber than a box of freaking rocks.

Where to start...
1) them initially expecting us to do 15+ custom websites at once while also doing the Project Management work (including all client communication) for all projects, for $33k a year....
2) Having to pull teeth to get a feeble raise
3) Rude clients

In my office, when a dev gets too talkative he/she gets boxed in and pretty much told to shut the hell up. 😂 #DevTimeout #LessFlapsMoreTaps

Headphones on loud. Close email, chat & phone. Prioritize your tasks and focus on one at a time.

When you bust your ass developing a site for a client, bend over backwards with changes - pushing the rest of your extremely large queue further and further behind, just to come in to a cancellation request from someone else at said company. 😡 We had really good rapport and the site looked amazing, and all they give me is "we're going in another direction". 😡 Why do people so this when the site is already finished?!? So rude! Before you comment telling me to charge upfront next time or whatever I work for a huge company so none of that is in my control.

"Pick up the phone" 😖

Dang bullies got to my stress ball 😢