Had to wirte and optimize a C++ program that finds for 1000x1000x1000 grid points the 100 nearest points for each (with an additional factor to make it more complicated).
It had to run in under 18 minutes to pass. No matter what I did I couldn't get it fast enough. I tried kd-trees, caching of certain points, optimizing distamce calculations by ommiting any irrelevant factor, saving points' calculated squares etc etc. When Ibwas down to 20 minutes, I realized, that my makefile had an error and ignored the - O3 flag...
Well, it actually ran 5 minutes with -O3.

Hahahaha

When I was a kid I fucked with a ouija board and now trying to debug massive regex expressions I swear Satan has finally come to screw me

Grammarly just found and corrected an embarrassing mistake in a legal document...

My typo was "onimated"...

Googles spelling and grammar changed it to "dominated"...

Grammarly figured out it should have been "nominated".

More Timezones

Client came to visit ,
The team had to give a presentation on our achievements...
I was asked to create the presentation...
Represented our achievements using memes and the client loved it 😬😬

Can relate

Made this one for all the Indian ranters here

"Time to turn the pi off"

$ sudo shutdown now

* Laptop turns off *

🤦‍♂️

Happened a while ago but I still find it funny.

*phone rings*
Me: good morning sir, how can I help you?
Client: MY WEBSITE IS OFFLINE, FIX IT RIGHT NOW.
M: I'm going to take a look, what's the domain?
C: *gives domain*
M: I see, that domain expired already, it was cancelled through our customer portal by the client, you maybe or someone you know?
C: WHAT?! MY INTERNATIONAL BUSINESS DEPENDS ON THAT DOMAIN, I'D NEVER CANCEL IT, THIS IS BULLSHIT! I'F THE SITE GOES OFFLINE FOR A MONTH I'LL FUCKING GO BANKRUPT, YOU'RE GOING TO FIX THIS RIGHT NOW.
M: if I may ask, how is your business doing right now?
C: HOW IS THAT QUESTION RELEVANT RIGHT NOW?!
M: well, you said that if the site would go offline for a month, you'd go bankrupt. The domain registration ended about half a year ago so that's why I aske......

*beeeeep beeeeep beeeeep*

Well, okay then.

Hahaha 😂😂😂

Oh yeah. Hey guys. 2 things.
First off. Forgot to say. Officially got a job. Finally. So thank you for all the help/advice and patience with my depressive rants!!

I'm in a new chapter of my life now so thanks.

And secondly.

I FUCKING HATE MY JOB

Aaaand I’m 18 years old today!
age++;

Well that explains a LOT!

Lately I'm finding issues on git more helpful than StackOverflow.

I know those are different beasts, but for the harder/specific questions I'm finding more resources on the repos than on SO.

We all once printed "Hello World" & were acting like a pro 😏
Cheers, we all made it till here, more than "Hello World! 🍺

Fuck Development...I'm becoming a beekeeper!

They can just buy a different name right ?

Git.

The smallest utility made its way to being the largest companies must-have, the most critical part of the whole development landscape.

Using just plain C, Git can shred huge amounts of data insanely fast. It never gets old.

Git is a developer's scalpel.

How Programmers review code

I AM ROOT!!!

Why does everyone screenshot a Tweet, instead of using a perfectly good app 'Tweet2Pic' being available on Play Store.

P.S: I am the dev, shamelessly promoting my app. I am not sure if I can share links here 😅

😂😂 The name is ML....HTML😂😂

Anything in my Github page. Because I made them 🙃

Microsoft and Github merged successfully

People on LinkedIn be like 😂

Wait... Why didn't anyone thought about that?

Sure! I'll choose a job because of the free ice cream!

Are you fucking kidding me?

SO in a nutshell XD

Got semi drunk and thought "Now would be a good time to implement this feature"
*Codes for 2 hours straight without compiling once*
"Done. Good night"

The next morning:
Gets up and tries out feature
*Fixes 2 syntax errors/typos*
*Tries again*
*Feature works*