Someone deadass linked killedbygoogle.com in the comments of Google Cloud Next. It got deleted pretty quickly, but I can't stop loughing.

If I never have to use Teams again it would be too soon

Yesterday's (scheduled and adhoc) meetings:
10:30-11:00
11:00-11:30
12:30-1:30 (adhoc)
1:30-2:30
4:30-5:00
6:00-6:20 (adhoc)

Today's (scheduled) meetings:
9:30-10:00
11:00-12:00
12:30-1:15
1:30-2:30

Tomorrow's meetings include a 1:1 with my boss who will invariably ask why I'm not done on this "should take a week" project that I've had for a week, despite that he just unblocked me on yesterday morning, and I've had nothing but meetings since...

Fucking hell.
They fill my day with shit spaced out just enough to waste practically my entire freaking day so I can't get anything done, conveniently forget this, and then have the audacity to yell at me for not finishing my tickets. Of course I didn't finish! You all were too busy blabbing at me every day for the past fucking week! (Oh, and do they listen if I have something to say? Of course they fucking don't.)

Also, as a secondary rant, the product douchebag files tickets (usually complex as hell tickets worded to appear trivial) with enough missing information to make missing large sections of them easy. If I ask him for clarification, he tells me to read the ticket, and if I insist, he gets all exasperated and quickly zooms through the site faster than I can follow, shows maybe half of what's in the ticket, and asks why I don't know how to do any of this yet. After I finish his shit ticket (and true to his douchebag nature) he blames me for missing several of those pieces he never outlined or showed, and insists that I obviously don't test anything. And because that's clearly not douchey enough, the fucking sack of shit also goes behind my back and trashtalks me to my coworkers, tells them he can't trust me to do a simple fucking thing, and that he's given up on me.

What the FUCK is wrong with these people?

Remember defragging?

Anyone else like coding while high? A lot of the time it gives me a different, more simple, point of view of my problem which helps me find a solution a good amount of the time

Totally uncool / don't underestimate an extra space

Heres a rant: Why do comments not show on my ++'d (Oh I see what you did there, clever) posts? I ++ comments wayyy more frequently than full rants, weird design choice.

Here’s my step-by-step guide for the idiot:

1) take <cutting-egde tech> (Tech)
2) read documentation for Tech
3) figure out what you want to do with Tech
4) if you are being ambitious, simplify the idea appropriately
5) Go do the thing with the Tech
6 When you fail at something, RTFM
7) Rinse and repeat

Almost three years with the same salary. And my LinkedIn inbox full.

I'm really starting to think about going for a change...

What do you answer when you are asked how long it will take you to find the cause of a bug that no one has idea why is happening?

I started watching "Squid Games" this morning and well after the first round the players are given a chance to quit.

Which they do... But then come back.

Well, I bought some Ethereum a few weeks ago before crypto tanked...

But checking in this morning I'm now back to break-even...

And well feels like I'm gonna keep playing too...

Having a PM is like having a little kid, while driving somewhere, and he's constantly asking: "Are we there yet??".

Read source code and unit tests. Don’t bother documentation cause it’s outdated. Dig into the core, look where data goes in and where it gets out. Everything else is just a wrapper.

What is your greatest weakness?

My greatest weakness is that I don't trust people enough to let them know how the can leverage me by telling them my weaknesses.

I'll bet my left nut this thing is not going to solve my issue 😞

Ignore all the leftist/socialist agenda, noises. Humans don't work like that. Instead embrace capitalism. Why? Watch this.

https://youtube.com/watch/...

Well we have this hamster ....and lots of free time..so crypto??

i dislike the people that dont take mental illnesses seriously. its a serious thing and they don’t think its a real thing because they havent been through it.

Coronavirus

Dev: Ok issue fixed, you just need to log out and back in again on your end to receive the fix

User: It’s still not working

Dev: Did you log out and in again?

User: No why would I want to do that?

Dev: It’ll reset your locally saved login information which is causing the issue

User: I thought you said the issue was fixed?

Dev: On our end yes, we just need you to reset your end in order to receive the fixed version

User: Look I have been dealing with this issue for 6 months. Fixing bugs are your responsibility. I have too much to do, you have to get this fixed. *click*.

Dev: Yeah you submitted the bug ticket yesterday night though

Email from users manager later that day: <User> is saying you are refusing to fix this bug. This is unacceptable. Fix it or else I will escalate this. Also there are other bugs we noticed today too, fixing them is absolutely critical!

Dev: …

Dev: What other bugs did you notice?

*no response for 2 weeks and then:

User: Hey you can close this ticket, the issue seems to have resolved itself.

Dev: ….muppet.

After 2 years of applying for jobs and not getting any, I'm beyond tired of hearing employers complain to me and ask: "You have a Bachelors degree in Computer Science, you should be able to find a job without breaking a sweat".

Excuse me? In what world do you live in? Are you not aware that we have been living in an academically oversaturated market for more than two decades now? Nowadays you need a degree, plus a heavy portfolio plus crazy interest in the field (to an obsessive degree) because the competition is fierce.

It's not my fault I don't get jobs. It's always some "no fit", "not enough experience" bullshit.

Sigh.. seriously.

Hello @world,

This is my first #Rant, I am a PHP developer currently working for a beats marketplace company based in L.A.

I am looking forward to exploring and engaging with the community.

Based on real life

First rant that I really want to get out of my chest!

Never hated a job as much as this one. Haven’t done any development/programming related work since I joined. I have been mostly configuring Linux systems for IoT devices. When I get stuck at an issue, it takes me many frustrating nights to figure it out because no one on the team wants to deal with Linux shit… they’d rather be doing real development work (someone actually stated this!). There’s no one else on the team that knows Linux. Even the manager that was supposedly a Linux fanatic can’t even answer some of my questions and if they do, it’s the wrong fucking answer. Joined the company because they sold it as startup team with big money backing. Was excited to learn new technologies, new best software engineering practices, add new programming languages to my resume. But nope, been stuck at configuring Linux systems. At one point I was just pumping out updated Linux images with our updated application for a month straight. I was so excited when a development task was assigned to me a couple weeks back, but guess what?! There were Linux configuration tasks that no one knows how to do or don’t want to look at it, so my one and only fucking development work was swapped out!

And the funny thing is, I barely had any Linux experience when I joined. Why the fuck was I hired?

Man, I even bought books related to Linux programming (application and kernel) before I joined. Those books barely have a crease in them. What a waste.

Now in my free time, I’ve been learning new technologies on my own. Doing my own projects. But damn, I lose a lot of family time. Sorry wifey, I haven’t been paying a lot of attention to you!

But who knows, maybe this experience will have a silver lining in the end.

Thanks for reading :)

Sometimes I really have a feeling that God invented Jira to punish me
I really hate it . It's like working with an OCD and sinile old man .
More over this Jira comes with Entourage of duchbags that suppose to support it, but are stupid as fuck.

Me at an interview...
interviewer: can u solve a 3-sum problem
me: sir, a threesome is not a problem
interviewer: not threesome, 3-sum
me: OOOOO! that makes sense

A coworker asked me for help so they could finish their task on time. That meant that I had to be a bit late for one of mine. They blamed me for delaying the whole team because I didn't finish mine on time. 😕

NIGHT MARE? MY CODING NIGHT MARE IS USING IPAY88 for the project. Ipay88 is the well-known payment integration in my country but their service is fucked up, I wrote an article of comparing Ipay88 and stripe. IPAY88 is fucked up. So for those who would like to programme a backend system or application to Southeast Asian customers , please don't use ipay88! use alternatives.

Read it here https://johnmelodyme.wordpress.com/...

A big FUCK YOU to all those sites that disable paste on text inputs

I've seen a job vacancy that asks for the following characteristics in a developer:

- extraverted, do'er (as opposed to thinker), out-of-the-box, curious, sees solutions and not problems, structural thinking vs. theoretical thinking, loves change, acts immediately, makes choices under stress, critically questions themselves if things go wrong

What the [censored] kind of programmer is that? Sounds more like a wannabe brogrammer type.

A typical, real programmer is introverted (for he is introspective, detail-minded and is therefore good at inspecting problems and finding solutions for them).

Seeing problems is not a bad thing, it's in fact necessary to be able to identify issues and not act like your typical manager who only wants to rush to solutions. He thinks deeply and theoretically before he takes action. Theory is the foundation of identifying a problem.

What programmer is stress-resistant? It's not normal for the human brain to be able to deal with stress; this is why switch-tasking is so hard.

Question yourself if things go wrong? Perhaps, but this sounds more like trying to shove the blame around.

Since we live in a rigid computer world with rigidly-defined protocols (say, HTTP), it is often useful to think in a conventional way. Out-of-the-box? Sure, if you're being innovative, or sure, as a tangential characteristic.

In my professional opinion, this vacancy reeks of bad corporate culture.. and the biggest alarm bell I find is: "There is free beer!" Err.. yeah. Anyway.