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(\____/)
( ͡ ͡° ͜ ʖ ͡ ͡°)
\╭☞ \╭☞
week 119
@dfox way to convince people for clean their desk
I hope everyone's wife / mom is feeling proud.
ʘ‿ʘ8 -
I was at my uncle's village.
Where getting internet is big thing,very far from main city.
I was talking with one shopkeeper.
I told him ,I am software developer.
He ask me questions that
"How can I improve my business using software?"
To help me figure out situation.
He told me problems he is facing right now.
Accounting/inventory management/contact's with big retailers.
He was so genuinely explaining it.
He don't want next billion dollar startup.
He want to solved his problem.
I am really impressed after that conversation because person who don't know what is excel is talking about ERP software.
I am going to develop that software.
#respect14 -
Client: we need extraordinary website in ordinary price.
Me: ohk *google search* WordPress free theme.12 -
Real Chat with new female friend.
Me : what are you studying now?
she : First year of MBBS
Me : that's nice. Generally boys/girls take admission in engg and commerce.
she : yuk. I hate engineer's and engineering specially that PC worm's(soft engg).
Me : k
She : what are you studying?
Me : soft engg
she : I didn't mean it.
Me : it's ok
-_-
WTF man32 -
what a irony !
manager using MBP 2017 for browsing and presentation.
graphic designer is working on window xp sp2 dual core.
coreldraw
-_-5 -
one of my cousin ask me to help him for uploading his ex's private pics and videos on porn websites.
Because her parents are not allowing their marriage and she is not ready to go against family (he is not working anywhere, Jobless)
I simply take screenshots of our chat and send to his ex and her parents.
Hope they will punish him.16 -
once you start using linux on laptop. here is a condition of your mouse.
i don't know when I touched it last time.
16 -
A ecom website which sales premium gold product from 50k to 170k INR.
database : mysql
all passwords and user ID's are saved in plain text.23 -
If you are not wasting your 10hours to automate your half hour work then you are not a real programmer.6
-
*on call*
hr: hello , are you looking for a job change.
me : yes
hr: ok congo we have one opening for full stack developer
me : ok whats a jd?
hr : do you know reactjs?
me : yes
hr : do you know nodejs?
me : yes
hr : do you know bootstrap, jquery, photoshop, blender?
me : wait is it job for developer or graphic designer
hr : some time we give little task to our developer about editing photo and video
me : hmm intresting, I never tried blender but I can try if necessary. photoshop and other are ok for me
hr: that's great, we are looking for few more skills
me : ok
hr: . net and django
I started laughing😂😂😂😂
hr: what happened?
me: thank you for entertained me today, day was really rough.8 -
sad but reality
tiktokers create cring content and earn lots of money.
open source contributors create technology which is maintaining world but earn far less.
how can we expect bright future?32 -
Nothing technical
Just wanna share with my devrant family.
Now I have own restaurant.
Ya ya I know it's nothing techie but I m happy that I own some business and I will test my entrepreneur skills here.
Fucking happy.23 -
Person: What's more common than
c² = a² + b² ?
Me: Clients saying,
"I know how to do it myself but I just don't have time"
Source : twitter.com2 -
HOD: Hey, Can you conduct web development workshop for Jr.'s?
Me: no issue, Can you share syllabus?
HOD: download from the internet.
Me: cool, So may also be trained them related to GitHub.
HOD: what is GitHub?
Me: -_- nothing its little thing, I will manage.5 -
my company just paid adobe to use pirated copy of adobe software ,arrested one emp.
Multinational company -_-
listed company -_-
premium product -_-
why the hell they can't pay money to deserve one?
writing this rant on pirated windows.7 -
Weekend plan:
1. I will watch react conf
2. I want to complete vim cheat sheet
3. LFS project is too
4. Netflix
5. ........
...
.
.
Electricity : 😈
Fuck..
😡3 -
!rant ! technical
Just want to share with my devrant family.
Finally in relationship.
Funny thing is
Me-she
24-29
Hindu-jain
Non veg - veg
Don't have dressing sense- awesome dressing sense
Programmer-jewelry designer
Not so hygienic - so much hygienic
No gym ,no exercise - yoga master
Geeky - hate pc worms
2 times in jailed - follow every rule
Back bancher - front bancher
Love shayari/old bollywood song - EDM / western songs
Common bridge between us
MARVAL FANS
😂19 -
Best client ever:
Yesterday I meet my new client. He need portfolio website for his logistics business.
So I meet him and explain my previous experience in website development.
After 1hour he gave me advance 50% of total cost.1 -
few years back,I wanted to be become supercar designer or weapon designer.
Due low grade in 12th.I got admission in computer science instead of mechanical.
c was introduced in 1st sem.
Score well in first year.
college offer me to change my field cs -> mechanical
4 year later (now)
2 drop's
1) due to health
2) financial issues
happy to be full stack developer.
still like cars and weapons but choosed cs as my real career.16 -
Weekends be like:
Half day = *thinking* what should I do in weekend
Half day= *thinking in regret* I didn't do anything productive
😂😂😂3 -
*while drinking tea at cafe area*
me*thinking* : may be this is going to solve that error
yes
yess
yesssss
I got solution
but wait let's first drink this tea then I will try this solution
*came back on desk*
me*thinking* : -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
what was solution ? wtf?1 -
me : what is your age?
she : never asked girl her age
*found her linkedIn profile bsc from XYZ clg : 2009-12*
-_-
really easy to find information of many people's now a days.
just need basic google dork know.16 -
My last to last companies boss.
He was kernal in INDIAN ARMY.
Once customer call me now start using bad words ,I try to stop my self and trying to be a professional person but he was asshole.
So I start using bad words.
Immediately cut his internet connection and cctv connection everything which was in my hand?
I told him to come office.
He was 45 year person ,I was 19 year boy ,he bring some friends to beat me.
My boss got this news ,he immediately come to office n locked my cabin.
Stand infront of them.
N hold customers collars.
Told him that I don't know your background but I was kernal ,I believe in my employ ,he will never crossed his limit until you crossed your.
If you touch him out of office then I will show my power.
Before that he not even asked me any question.15 -
It's 1:20am
Body: let's sleep.
Heart: beer or rum.
Brain: why the hell js is not working as expected? -
OS : Tail OS ✓
pass : 16+ ✓
Update password : every 15 days ✓
Mac address : spoofing ✓
Then you realise
Your Aadhar information is in gov DB.
14 -
My life was total mess up before this I.e.
Break
Return from death door
Drop in education
Financial unstable
Literally 1.5-2years was worst.
From last 3-5 months
I gave up FB(personal account ,I need it for digital marketing)
Unfollow every entertainment page from Instagram
Join Twitter
Increase activity in devrant
Subscribe to development related content in reddit
New YouTube channel just for learning purpose (never search songs and other stuff on it)
Start reading books like zero to one,think and grow rich....
Biography's of great people's like
Steve jobs
Elon Musk
Shivaji Maharaj
And many more
Stop chatting on stupid topics (hot girls,....)
Attained meditation camp
Start meditation (Vipassana)
Life feels more sorted
Thanks everyone13 -
I was reading devrant.
Obviously I was laughing while reading different rant's.
My curious friend
F: what are you reading? Look's something funny.
M: devrant
F: what?
M: it is developer's community.
F: show
*After reading few rant's*
F: 😪
Nothing interesting
M: don't ask me again about your pc , mobile, software issues
😏3 -
!rant
Many dev ranting that apple is reached $1T by selling stupid connector's...... and other shit.
I am not apple product owner.
But Today I want to salute steve jobs.
A person without college degree,drug addiction,guilt of adopted son,financial issue's without any god father........................
Created one company.
Kicked out from own company.
Joinned again.
developed such policy in company that every one should follow.
took retirement due to cancer and all right's transfer to A Gay CEO.
and
now that company reached $1T.
Really fucking motivational thing.
Nothing is impossible.29 -
Mom asked me one question.
How money transfer from one bank to another?
It was longest communication we ever had in few months.
I am happy for that question.
😊😊😊😊6 -
What the fuck man.
Why even I am working with this assholes.
Yesterday,Our technical support guy reinstalled windows(I don't mess up with technical issues because then it will be my part time job,so I show that I don't know anything about hardware).
He installed fucking 32 bit window,He was trying to installed 64 bit version thunderbird.
He wasted my whole day.16 -
long message
whatsapp : * scroll *
reply : depend on last line happy sad whatever emoji ,sent same
devrant : *something important ,I must read everything* -
client : show website
me: sir server is down
client : what? I don't know,I want to see my website.
me: sir try to understand it is not my issue
client *call cut*
fucking asshole -_-1 -
I booked one domain for my client.
Which is mi*****.***
Now he want new domain with following change
Mi*****.***
😑🙄😏😥2 -
today I saw conditions in the gov office.
their fucking web app from ancient time depended on IE browser.
And
We were expecting productivity from them.
=_=3 -
Don't scroll here.
Go and live a real life,
Don't make a computer screen as your world,
there is a beautiful world outside of your cave,
Talk with people's face to face,
go
go
go.
Ok enough philosophy, Time to add new shit in current shitty code.
(-_-)6 -
Thinking to start business
Vegetables at door step.
I have 100+ farmers in contact. Who can provide vegetables daily.
What is your view/suggestion on it.20 -
This scene is an 8-year-old.
My friend(F) got his first mobile. First featured mobile.
Maximum smartness in that mobile was a snake game and Bluetooth.
So I decided to prank him.
M: Bro do you know this particular model need a network to use Bluetooth?
F: I am not stupid to believe you.
M: I can prove that.
F: K prove me, I will give you treat.
M: ok, turn on your Bluetooth paired it with my Bluetooth.
F: Ok
*start sending him the movie. We were on the train, a train was about to enter the tunnel*
M: When the train will enter a tunnel, We will lose network and sending will fail.
F: ok let's see.
*when a train enters in a tunnel, we shift light to black in meantime for 3-4 sec our eyes feel blindness. so I closed eyes before entering a tunnel and once train enter in the tunnel immediately restart Bluetooth *
M: look sending failed
F: Seriously man, I didn't know that.
M: It's ok bro next time inform me before buying any electronics.
F: sure
M: my treat?
F: Yup
*for next few days, he was thinking that Bluetooth need a network to send files until whole group laugh on him*4 -
!RANT
my friend who never smoke or drink or relationship to much career oriended.working in multinational company. recently south african petrol company gave offer letter to him.
he was ill from few days.(completed his engineering in civil with 9.1 pointer last year.)
somekind of syndrome found in him. due to which he will not able to walk in 2 years.
he share this information with me. asking me tips,"how to inform my mom dad? I don't wan to face them. I can't do anything for them."
life is fucking unfair with some peoples.1 -
I am listening EDM from 3days and Today this notification reminds me,Google data stealing and selling to other companies.
2 -
Sometimes it's irritating
Workstation in office : windows/Mac
Home : Ubuntu
Virtual machine : fedora
Developing : LFS (just for hobby)
😂😂😂
Still searching for arch and BSD 😂😂7 -
Best Hardware support team.
I hope every one of you got such team.
My keyboard was not working properly.
programmer's most used special character ; is auto typing anywhere that is obviously keyboard issue so I called H/W support team.
me: *explained above problem.*
supporter : Ya we know that issue ,YOUR HARD DRIVE IS CORRUPTED. We have 2 option
1) either we can formate your system.
2) We have to change hard drive.
Me thinking : *devrant stuff found*
Me: that is really sad part. How many time you solved such problem?
S: This is my first time in this company ,previously I solved such issue more than 10 time.
Me: you really look smart.
S: thank you,any how I will resolved this issue today.
Me: today I am going earlier but yes we will meet on monday. thank you for quick response.7 -
bought one of most trending things domain name.
daily 1m+ hit every day for that keyword.
little confuse
what is next ?4 -
I can't sleep whenever I remember ,few year before I paid $25 for ethical hacking workshop and they show us inspect element n SQL map
-
Anybody who is crying for slow machine issue. You can do this think.
1. Replace your HDD with ssd (256gb in 3500 INR)
2. buy DVD shape hdd holder (cost 700 INR)
3. replace DVD with this case
Benefits :
Speed up
No need to worry about data backup
Enjoy
My boot time of window 10
3 mins to 15sec18 -
"Dear Team,
This is to inform you that due to the workload of Diwali 10th Nov would be working a half day
So the 10th Nov holiday would be shuffle to 17th Nov 2018 (i.e. Saturday)
Note:- Those team member taking leave on 10th Nov it would calculate 5 days of leave."
Got this mail -_-9 -
Note for managers,
If your intern doing 6hours task in 3 hours doesn't mean he is ready for next task.
It is fucking mean that he did his task give him time to take some breath.1 -
Need suggestion:
I gave interview in small company. They give me task to complete one project then we will give you job.
It takes me 2 weeks.
Now they are ready to give me job but they want that project in free of cost. What should I do?7 -
what are your fav songs while coding?
mine:
old bollywood (black and white) songs and instrumental music mostly hariprasad chaurasia's flute.13 -
one of our sales manager ask me,
"what so difficult to build ecommerce website, we work more than you because we strugle on field."
I just smile and start walking.6 -
believe me,
when your companies non-technical HOD(marketing), start a discussion with you on topics like Elon Musk and other hot topics in the technical world.
It feels good
2 hours no code just discussion on fav topics.3 -
One more startup proposal
And
I accept it
$500
One condition
I will not maintain anything.
Plot twist : it was my toy project
Every week I will show progress.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂6 -
May be it is small thing to many people's but as a less experience Developer it is big thing for me.
I AM GOING TO LEAD PROJECT.😊
Ohk project is not so big..3 -
confession time:
I am php laravel developer with little knowledge about nodejs.
I got selected by one startup as nodejs developer.
frankly I am not better nodejs developer than my competition who were rejected.
I completed oral interview with my nodejs theory knowledge at a time of technical round , they gave us task to create crud with fantastic front end and nodejs mongo as a back end.
I developed front end in bootstrap but at a time of backend, I just copy paste code from github.
and changed everything variable and other proof to hide reality. in mean time other candidates were actually coding everything then I took time to understand this code and I submitted after few candidates.
in last round they ask me to explain code which I explained properly and I get salary 40k/month INR.
I know it is cheating but I wanted this job badly.6 -
most productive workflow I ever seen.
excel 1 : stock
excel 2 : order
compare stock with order manually 1000+ product.
excel 3 : check history of order generator (shop)
excel 4 : today's price of product + tax
excel 5 : alot specific unit's of product
excel 6 : maintained bill credit/debit
next step : forword to managers for approval
excel 7 : edit's from nanager
process repeat till managers approval
excel 8 : dispatched history
excel 9 : return product (reason's/unit)
excel 10 : stock update return + new product's
and few more excel's
data of 5+ year's
daily 500+ order's
lPO listed company
i have not mentioned account and other stuff
(╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻2 -
Not a rant
After coding, cooking/ book reading is my favorite hobby.
Before last 3 month I took dcsn to give a shot to my other hobby cooking and pause on coding for few months.
I decided to give 100days to my cafe.
Arranging money and perfect location took 2 months , on 16 july I started my cafe not so fancy, just sweet simple.
Means 30 days we're completed,
I was earning 1000 inr as software developer, i am earning 10000 inr daily . My net profit is 1500inr
Moral of the story
Don't hesitate to take risk
Believe on yourself
Never never never start with partnership
Currently I have to pay 1.5 lakh to my ex business partner who left cafe in first 15 days
N
Forget personal life. Your business is your priority.
Not spend even १ full day with my family and gf in last 3 months.
Soon I will back in software.
Have a good day to everyone.11 -
trying to login fb
username : ...........
pass : ...................
without thinking just type that pass
error changed pass 2 year back
again try to remember same password
:(
unable to remember1 -
first time trapped in cooperate politics. -_-
"chaliye es khel ko shuru kiya jaye"
"let's start the game "4 -
friend : bro which phone may I buy?
me : mi / honor
next day
f : bro are you sure?
m : yup pretty sure ,in your budget this 2 are best phone
after 3-4 day
*call*
f : bro I buy phone.
m : congo , which pne ?
f : oppo f9
o(╥﹏╥)o5 -
!rant
hey dev's,
I need help for choosing laptop.
I will need it for deep learning.
DELL G7 7588
config:
pro : i9-8950HK
gpu : GTX 1060
ram : 16 gb ddr4
ssd : 512
hdd : 1TB
your reviews please42 -
Reason to hate my D grade engineering college.
1st lecture of web development.
(Syllabus html,css,PHP)
Expectation : at least teacher will introduce fucking web development technologies.
Reality:
Teacher=> look I don't know anything about PHP so learn from web. I will give you internal marks just submit assignment on time.
😅
Btw it is not story.3 -
My job in company to developed e-commerce website as a full stack developer.
History of that project.
Company paid 300,000 INR to the local web development firm for developing previous website and they developed website without bootstrap/SSL/Even save information of high profile client in plain text.
I am not angry on that web firm ,I am laughing on my company because such client never trust on independent developers who work hard ,code day and night to complete freelancing projects.
I hope my work will make differnce in their selling. -
Unable to access cpanel/whm due to IP changed error.
called HR
me : please connect me to networking team (out sourced)
hr : why ?
me : I have some issue to access cpanel. I contacted to hosting comapny but it is not their fault so may be it's our network issue.
hr : explain me in details.
me : ok
from morning I am trying to access whm because our website is out of bandwidth limit and showing 509 error ,I contacted to hosting comapny but they explained me problem from our side. SO i wanted to talk with network team about this issue because I am not using any proxy or vpn even my tor browser is off too still ip chaged error giving frustation. second reason I am frusted that my public IP and private IP is not chaged.
one more your windows pc freeze 3 times from morning.
do you need in detailed technical reason why I want to talk with them.
hr : no no no *hang up*
after 2 minute *my landline ring*
hr : network engineer on other side.
fair enough2 -
one more time, I proud of my team and MD too.
XYZ is our office boy. He completed his BSc IT from 3rd Grade college due to family condition and lack of knowledge, he has to work as an office boy.
So my team decided to teach him web development. We are starting it from very basic. We get total 1:30 hours of a lunch+snack's break so each one of us will give 1-day to teach him but It is not free. We will need good coffee in this deal. Our MD like this idea and promised us that once we gave him a green signal. He can do his first internship here. -
I feel lucky to be a developer.
yes just keep frustrating hours of debugging and other boring stuff aside for a moment.
I love to solved physical problem with digital solutions, I worked as a full stack developer in company using same skills to earn money by doing freelancing.
while my other non techie friends are crying for extra income, I earn enough in freelancing to pay my rent and other stuff
😍😍😍😍2 -
When people are thinking that just by deleting UIDAI number ,their phone is hack free now.🤣🤣
This are same people who installed app from SHAREit , access adult content without proxy n JavaScript off ,access raile net /public net and enter private information.🤣🤣2 -
Little story.
Manager give me task, Send mail through mail chimp to many groups and schedulled them differntly.
Day1 : it litterly waste my half hour.
Night 1 :create script using Selenium (utilize my 2 hours because It was new for me.)
Day 2 : I am devrant. (script is doing my task)
Manager is also happy that I am doing extra work. -
Friend (civil engineer) : bro do you have windows cd?
Me : no but why?
F: I want to format my pc.
M : then buy genuine copy.
F : don't want to waste money in that.
M : then don't cry for lagging windows 😂😂😂
F : do you have any cost efficient way?
M : yes ,but tell me one thing ,why do you need a computer?
F : browser , office , Dropbox ( cad installed in his desk which have genuine windows)
*After 10 minutes of conversation*
F: I will bring laptop , install Ubuntu in it2 -
Searching new laptop / system on current laptop / system can hurt feelings of it.
It's same as asking gf which is better girl than you 😂😂😂😂2 -
Strangermeet up conversation
Stranger: m22
Me: just sleep bro ,u can't get girl here.
Stranger : can't sleep R8 now, reading quantum computing book.
Me : interesting
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Yes we are now friends (#~#) -
promise yourself
you will never ever show your geek knowledge to stupid people's.
or ready to face some stupid hacking questions.3 -
just realize, I have not talked face to face with anybody in a whole day
(little conversation on phone and chat)
total of 8 peoples in my office room including me and 30 + in the whole office.
that means either every device working properly in office or it's my luckiest day.4 -
2 min silence for my friend.
who got contract to edit and make golden frame of "naga baba"
he have to zoom each and every part of naga baba to clear and make render image.
xD XD16 -
jr.: which os may I used for our syllabus?
me: look every OS has it's own pron and cons .
jr : ohh. still tell me.
me: but linux is superior among them. use ubuntu.4 -
Ahhhh...
Finally project shifted on their server and everything working as expected.
Finally I can take breathe for a minute.
In mind(why don't I called her and make some movie plan)
..
..
.
Second client call :
Hey can you come to office our IVR not working properly?
Life sucks man -
Hey Devranter's from mumbai
Why not we meet somewhere in Mumbai?
Please tag other ranter's in comment Who are from Mumbai.
@Floydian17 -
I used mint, Ubuntu,Kali but now I want to change my Linux flavour.
My work is mostly on backend development (PHP, MySQL).
Which one may I try next?
(All previous Linux are f9 for me I just want to use new distro)3 -
Pgadmin4 error: could not connect to server
Tried to delete data from pgadmin folder but didn't worked for me2 -
can you share some interesting and useful topics for a web developer(PHP), who want to become nodejs based full stack developer?
udemy courses link will be useful.2 -
Hello devrant,
Need guidance about QR code based coupon system.
In my restaurant I sale few food items. My 50+ customer bought food daily (on delivery). They are asking me for coupon system like I sale one sandwich for half 30 INR , they bought 3-4 per day.
So they can buy coupon of 100 sandwich on every delivery my delivery boy will scan QR code of customer and their sandwich count will decrease accordingly.
This will apply for every food item.
Can you suggest me current software for this.1 -
Electronjs "framework to developed cross platform desktop application but not able to install in Ubuntu😢"6
-
Hey devrant buddies,
I wanna learn AR development,
I am react developer,
May I go with viroAR or suggest something from your side4 -
hey folks,
need opinion about prisma grahql.
is it mature tech for ecommerce platform?
documentation and online help?1
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