My professor once asked us to brainstorm a good topic for our IT seminar/workshop.

I suggested version control using Git.

She simply shrugged it off. She said she needed a topic that the class can use. WTF.

Wife: "How hard is to make a phone app?"

Me: "Depends on what it is, why?"

Wife: "I had an idea for a cool app that does blah blah blah"

Me: "That actually sounds like a cool app. Let's brainstorm tonight and come up with a plan and see if we need to hire some freelance devs for it"

Wife: "Cool, I also want to make an app to blahblah2, oh and one to blahblah3.. oh hmm what about.."

<facepalm>

Our software uses a lot of video/audio hardware. But this hardware goes away when we deliver to the customer.
So everyone was asked to think of a way to be less depended on hardware.
I thought of a very clever idea and I told it to two senior software engineers who both saw much potential in it.

I've only worked here for close to 2 months. And I feel like this is a major contribution if they'll use my idea

Next week at the brainstorm session I'll have to present my idea (informal meeting)

I'll make an update when I know more

So, now that companies are used to "WFH", maybe we can agree upon a better office for tech companies?

I do actually think the more "ideal" tech company office wouldn't have to be expensive.

It can be smaller. Any tech company worth it's salt should have discovered in the last few months that it's not just devs who can work from home. Sales, support, management — you really don't need to fight your way through highway traffic or cram yourself into a sweaty subway every day.

There's value in having an office. Not everyone can fit a good workspace in their apartment.

But we could at least center it around:

1. A bunch of small, completely soundproof isolation booths, for those who need a focus space, and can't find a silent spot at home.

2. A social lounge space, a communal living room with couches, a bar, creative relaxing stuff, whiteboards, etc. WFH can become depressing even for the most antisocial employees, chilling on a couch with some coworkers to brainstorm ideas or chat about random tech is valuable for building good relationships with your team.

The "open plan office" with rows of desks and monitors, no matter how luxuriously decorated with vertical gardens and hipster desks from reclaimed wood, can go die a fiery painful death.

I either want to work, or socialize.

Open plan offices (and it's even more dystopian suicide-inducing cousin, the cubicle) are like being unable to choose between fucking and a blowjob, so you end up humping a navel.

Oh, and conference rooms, go fuck yourself as well. I want to be able to minimize your ugly face if you plan to talk about company financial reports for 2 hours.

Reasons to be a developer(brainstorm):
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devRant (the best i could think of)

I need ideas.
What's the best use for several old, moderately crap laptops (<= 4GB RAM) I have lying around? I'm using one as a minecraft server because 3GB ram is enough and the Pi isn't, but past that, I'm pretty stuck. They all work, mostly, have CD drives and mostly free hard drives.

My team lead be like when we're in a meeting with the boss:

He: I'll have a working session with her, we'll brainstorm on how to come up with a better design and improve such and such feature, once that's done, we would call you to have another meeting.
Boss: sounds good, I'm looking forward to it.
Me: *internally rolls eyes...*
He: thank you everyone.
.
*meeting done*
.
.
.
couple of minutes later, I get a message from him:

He: hey, it turns out I'm busy and I can't have that session with you, do come up with a new idea/design and share it with me.
Me: .... *fuck you, like you didn't know you were busy before making that fake promise*
.
.
.

The fucker will take credit again for things he didn't do.

A: Hey, let's brainstorm for a good name for our new hipster coffee.
B: Ice-Coffee!
C: Cool-Coffee!
D: Karacho!

A: Take my money!

______
I'm not quite sure, but doesn't Karacho mean Penis in Spanish?

After you brainstorm on a white board, take a photo, and clean up after yourself.

Coworkers were complaining about dried white board marker.
I told them to use the hand sanitizer from the bathroom, it will clean off all marks.

Now you know too.

I got freelance contact for this simple static website.

Now the client is having a brainstorm and started giving more and more requests for features...

Slowly it's going to be not worth it...

I hate it when I brainstorm for 4 hours straight and the only good idea I come up with is something impossible to by a one-man.

2 hour meeting to brainstorm ideas to improve our system health monitoring (logging, alerting, monitoring, and metrics)

Never got past the alerting part. Piss poor excuses for human being managers kept 'blaming' our logging infrastructure for allowing them to log exceptions as 'Warnings', purposely by-passing the alerting system.

Then the d-head tried to 'educate' everyone the difference between error and exception …frack-wad…the difference isn't philosophical…shut up.

The B manager kept referring to our old logging system (like we stopped using it 5 years ago) and if it were written correctly, the legacy code would be easier to migrate. Fracking lying B….shut the frack up.

The fracking idiots then wanted to add direct-bypass of the alerting system (I purposely made the code to bypass alerting painful to write)

Mgr1: "The only way this will work is if you, by default, allow errors to bypass the alerting system. When all of our code is migrated, we'll change a config or something to enable alerting. That shouldn't be too hard."
Me: "Not going to happen. I made by-passing the alert system painful on purpose. If I make it easy, you'll never go back and change code."
Mgr2: "Oh, yes we will. Just mark that method as obsolete. That way, it will force us to fix the code."
Me: "The by-pass method is already obsolete and the teams are already ignoring the build warnings."
Mgr1: "No, that is not correct. We have a process to fix all build warnings related to obsolete methods."
Mgr2: "Yes. It won't be like the old system. We just never had time to go back and fix that code."
Me: "The method has been obsolete for almost a year. If your teams haven't fixed their code by now, it's not going to be fixed."
Mgr1: "You're expecting everything to be changed in one day. Our code base is way too big and there are too many changes to make. All we are asking for is a simple change that will give us the time we need to make the system better. We all want to make the system better…right?"
Me: "We made the changes to the core system over two years ago, and we had this same conversation, remember? If your team hasn't made any changes by now, they aren't going to. The only way they will change code to the new standard is if we make the old way painful. Sorry, that's the truth."
Mgr2: "Why did we make changes to the logging system? Why weren't any of us involved? If there were going to be all these changes, our team should have been part of the process."
Me: "You were and declined every meeting and every attempt to include your area. Considering the massive amount of infrastructure changes there was zero code changes required by your team. The new system simply worked. You can't take advantage of the new features which is why we're here today. I'm here to offer my help in any way I can with the transition."
Mgr1: "The new logging doesn't support logging of the different web page areas. Until you can make that change, we can't begin changing our code."
Me: "Logging properties is just a name+value pair dictionary. All you need to do is standardize on a name and how you add it to the collection."
Mgr2: "So, it's not a standard field? How difficult would it be to change the core assembly? This has to be standard across all our areas and shouldn't be up to the developers to type in anything they want."
- Frack wads smile and nod to each other like fracking chickens in a feeding frenzy
Me: "It can, but what will you call this property? What controls its value?"
- The look I got from both the d-bags I could tell a blood vessel popped.
Mgr1: "Oh…um….I don't know…Area? Yea … Area."
Mgr2: "Um…that's not specific enough. How about Page?"
Mgr1: "Well, pages can cross different areas, and areas cross different pages…what do you think?"
Me: "Don't know, don't care. It's up to you. I just need a name."
Mgr2: "Modules! Our MVC framework is broken up in Modules."
DevMgr: "We already have a field for Module. It's how we're segmenting the different business processes"
Mgr1: "Doesn't matter, we'll come up with a name later. Until then, we won't make any changes until there is a name."
DevMgr: "So what did we accomplish?"
Me: "That we need to review the web's logging and alerting process and make sure we're capturing errors being hidden as warnings."
Mgr1: "Nooo….we didn't accomplish anything. This meeting had no agenda and no purpose. We should have been included in the logging process changes from day one."
Mgr2: "I agree, I'm not sure why we're here"
Me: "This was a brainstorming meeting as listed in the agenda. We've accomplished 2 of the 4 items. I think we've established your commitment to making the system better. Thank you all for coming."

- Mgr1 and 2 left without looking at me or saying a word.

I feel so much better when I actually talk through problems I’m having with a project with someone that can help me brainstorm. It sometimes makes me feel bad because I didn’t do it myself, but there’s also a lot of things that I learn through the process.

At work we have to split a potentially large ID into 2 10-digit long parts that will be passed to an outside system that will later return them with some more data to us.

A colleague had implemented it using regular expression, it passed code review, everything was ok, until he noticed a potential problem. For some cases, because the outside system stores them as int and therefore will remove any leading zeros, there will be no way to reconstruct the number.
So we brainstorm and I propose ether a modified regex, or to just use math like part1 = id % 10^10 and part2 = floor(id % 10^10) and then we can reconstruct it simply by: part2 * 10000000000 + part1

Colleague: - Well, the regex will be faster, there won't be any calculations
Me: - :| I disagree but ok..

We do some more brainstorming and testing and find a case where the proposed new regex fails as well
So I bring up my previous proposal, I explain what exactly it does.

Colleague: - I don't like the math, it has calculations, which won't be needed before we reach the 11th digit

Have I missed some major development in computer hardware? When did they become bad/slow at doing math? :|

I've been a "firefighter" on our big money-making project for like a year now and probably will be for the next year. Every sprint, fully booked out.
However, this sprint, some people think I have time to brainstorm, learn new tech and attend meetings related to a completely new project.
"Will it done in 2 weeks?"
"How long do you estimate?"
I can knock up a rough version of your fucking application in about a week if someone grows some fucking balls and schedules me some fucking time for it. STFU and stop interrupting my other work. Allocate some time or shove it up your ass so far until you regurgitate it then swallow it again and choke on it.

Team lead: guys, we need to brainstorm on feature X. We can have this service do blah blah..., have a cache at blah blah...

Me: I think it's too complicated. We can simplify the design by doing blah blah... and measure the performance as we go, let's not do premature optimization.

Team lead: no, we definitely need this. We'll pitch this to the CTO later

*Later when we meet the CTO*
Team lead: Hi Mr CTO, about feature X, we're gonna do this blah blah... what do you think?

CTO: *basically repeats what I said*

Team lead: Thank you for the insights, really helpful. We will do as you suggest.

WHAT THE FUCK?

How hard is it to make a custom steno-lithography API? And do I even need one?

Hi, all. My name is J.A and I am co-owner of 3DPrintedDreams with my best friend. (We are both 17.)

During a brainstorm of what should be the flagship feature of our shop should be. We decided to take user images, (exact specifications TBD), and then use an API to transform them into .stl files so my friend can print it on his 3D Printer.

I am asking how hard or "easy" would it be to make such an API and what would be the bottom dollar if I were to make a collab post here about it? If anyone would be willing to listen, I could explain how all this would work in relation to the full stack of my website.

p.s. I understand that experience costs money and I myself have experienced this, but, we spent most of our money on the Pallete 2 from Mosaic. (about $500).

HOWEVER, we still have some money left. If a suggested price is to much for us to pay up-front, 3DPrintedDreams is willing to pay you in installments dermined by mutual agreement.

Thanks for your time and have a nice day!

-Josh

Co-founder of 3DPrintedDreams, LLC (Pending).

Couldn't find any satisfactory explanation online, so here is a question. Discussions idea etc are welcome.

How is the colour fill tool implemented in paint or other software?

I remember it running superfast on old 98 machines. Got me curious to think how they achieved it.

(correct me if I am wrong, recursion won't be a good idea for large images.)

Where and How do you make developer friends.

My coworkers are smart and decent developers but they learned on the job for the job.

But they're not interested in discussing improvements to legacy projects that barely still work until they break and we need to rush to recreate them 'better'.
or sit on a call on the weekend working on spontaneous personal projects that usually die cause another idea came along.

Sometimes I really just want someone I can hop on a discord call with so they can criticize my projects and brainstorm ideas and improvements with me

Most of the times I have it all sorted out. But when I begin to code, I somehow forget where to start.

I really want an AI that codes like me so I don't have to

tired of asking AI to brainstorm ideas but it keeps solving things stupid

please, get with the program. learn my style. it's better. stop shoving your style at me. neck yourself (I can say this right? it's funny and AI has no necks anyway! dark humor funny 🥺, but illegal merchandise 😔)

*coffee rage*

guess I'll have to use my own brain because it's literally less frustrating than reading its drivel that it keeps messing up despite me saying corrections a billion times. and this is one of the SMARTER AIs. eesh

guys can you make the tools better already. *taps foot*

Just started doing my project for Java Class, a Polynomial Calculator App.

Get it done, get a dozen errors. Fix every bug. Find other bugs when inputting.
Brainstorm 5 minutes and realize I could change the way I write the polynomial at input.
Change 20 lines of code that do String, Split, Run through the split and check for coefficient and power, parse them to float in an array to specific positiona - to 5 simple lines.

Program works fine. No more previous errors.
Have the great idea to add the following:
-If you divide the Polynomial by 0 output "Are you retarded?"

P.s. I'm happy about my first project even if I hate Java.

Any good ideas for an application?

When I'm really really stuck, I generally stress out that I should be able to figure it out so I walk outside, sit down, listen to relaxing music and imagine I'm on some isolated mountain somewhere away from all the problems of deadlines and managers and algorithms...then i just write down what i need to do and what i have done already and have a little brainstorm session with myself over possible causes/solutions from sensible to crazy, just anything possible... generally I always come to 2 methods - divide and conquer and document and destroy (the latter being used in cases such as having to fix something in an undocumented 10,000s lines long sproc that someone who left the company wrote)

We had this revamp planned for this week. We were supposed to brainstorm and then come up with solutions. WFH hit it hard!! no solution coming out...

Soon launching a social networking app just for devs. Post Dev memes, Collab, rant, brainstorm over ideas, reach out to anyone for chat, post your cool devspace pictures and earn rewards. Stay tuned!

Ps- I know there are many similar platforms, this is just a project I developed learning coding app development so just don't brag me about the concept. Although, a better UI/UX never hurts!

The project is fully coded by me and am open for Sr. Devs collabs for the project.

When a non-dev manager invites you to a 'brainstorm' so that you can tell him how to design his team's architecture and tooling.

I didn't realize you wanted to promote me and give me a raise first....

Hello guys, apparently I'm going to write a thesis about Smart contracts and its benefits for the financial industry. Have you got any keywords I definitely should look into and write about in my thesis ? Just a little community brainstorm here. Would be glad if you could help me a little.

Also, do you think it's possible to fill about 50 pages in 8 week time ? The short time is making me nervous

Hey devs :)

Please help me find a project for my AP thesis. I know Java and some Mean stack. I'm supposed to start next month and it's due for Christmas. Any ideas?

Okay people couldn't get a response anywhere so I'm going to do this here considering we have a bunch of geniuses here. I need to create a tunnel in nodejs or java to forward connection from client to server. Need to do this because my damn client can only use ports 80/443. Anybody wants to brainstorm?
These people have so much of garbage data yet want to keep everything secure as hell.