Sister called me on my way to work (she never calls me, we communicate through a family signal) to ask if I wanted to come over for dinner in the weekend because a new guy she knows will be there and also my parents.

Me: hmm idk I've got a lot to do in the weekend....
Sis: he saw my laptop by the way, he was highly impressed that its dual booted and asked how on earth I know about Linux! Then I told him about you and what you do and now he really wants to meet you!
Me: what time would I have to be there?

I hate how that stuff can make me change my mind just like this 😅

I FUCKING HATE how I always have to prove my abilities twice to everyone just because I sit in a wheelchair!!!

I mean if the people on the street treat me like a child it's hard enough... they might just be afraid of the unknown or simply stupid... but at the office?
You know what I do for a living... What on earth would make you think you have to treat me as if I have some kind of cognitive disability as well?

I am going to roll/drive over the next guy who does something like that!!!

Sorry for the non dev rant but this had to get out

20+ years of experience and I hate where this industry is headed. Sure, we have second year grads telling us that they're "Full Stack" developers - but, imo... that's a "Full Stack of Bullshit".

I started developing online properties in 1989, at the ripe age of 17. Bulletin Board Systems. I knew the user experience before it was tagged onto some fuckwad's wonder-filled LinkedIn profile.

When I say, "Don't use that" - it's not the result of a control freak mechanism that seems to be built into every Facebitch/Twatter/SnatchChat fool in existence.

I do so, because I care enough to guide team members in the proper direction so they aren't driving themselves and others off a goddamn cliff, drooling onto mobile device like it's God's penis.

So, of course they do the complete opposite. Fail miserably. Finger point like the typical douche bags. And, slowly destroy the income of everyone around them.

At this point, I'd rather be homeless than to deal with anymore toxic bullshit. So, I'm done. Set up an exit strategy, and walked away from the highest paying position I ever had.

Fuck them and the full stack of bullshit they rode in on. Onward and upwards, fucktards. Enjoy finger-pointing into the mirror.

Back to Earth, in... 3 - 2 - 1.

(Takes a sip of coffee.)

So, how's everyone doing this fine morning?

My college organised some interview with a company, with the whole demn class. We went there, it was quite far away (50km) and the CEO invites us to a meeting room.

Where he bores me for 2 hours talking about their projects in argiculture and NSA like spying systems at tankstations.

They were caputuring license plates at gas stations and with that information gather data about the person, such as salary (by looking at their car), house adres ect. All without people knowing. And than targeting them with specific ads and offers.

The class of sheep were super excited but it pissed me off. Because he told it like it was some awesome advancement in technology that none of us could probably ever do.

He was demeaning us, saying we would do some simple wordpress sites there and other things. We are probably not good enough forc te big stuff.

Asking him some really hard questions about his projects made him so pissed he almost wanted to kick me out.

When it was finally over, there was some test that you have to do if you want to work there. If you were good enough at the test, you could!!!! (YEEY)

Uhm, I said; no thank you I dont want to work here.

Later I talked to my classmate and friend who always thinks he's better then everyone in class even tho he barely understands OOP programming. He was asking me if he should try to get the internship. I told him; dont. They have no value for us and they think they are the greatest company on the planet.

The fucking idiot go so pissed, he stopped talking to me alltogether and blocked me everywere. I AM NOT EVEN JOKING. Just because I gave my FUCKING opinon about a company he likes for no reason.

So this idiot does the test (which was fucking simple btw, I did it too and compared the results and I had 95%) He gets invited for another interview and gets told he will be paid 200 euro's per month 😂. and a free meal everyday!! 😪 hahaha . That doesnt even cover commuting costs!

My "friend" told him that the train costs more every day. You know what the CEO said? "Yeah but you can learn so much here the also brings value and you're just a last year student. But I think you are really brave for asking more"

So in the end, he couldnt take the internship and I was fucking right. Really I hate these kinds of companies thinking they are heaven on earth when they are clearly not.

I am happy I told them no before putting my dignity on thd line.

Rant++

Just want to mention this mother fucker named Allen. Allen is a fuckin' badass. This guy fucks.

This bad mother fucker like single handedly wrote one of the best fuckin libraries for displaying tabular data, and threw in a shit ton of JSON capabilities just to make it that much fuckin' cooler.

And why? Because he fuckin fucks thats fucking why. I already told you.

And does this son of a fuck support his fucking product? You bet your sweet basement dwelling programming fucking ass that he does.

Dude works that support forum like he no doubt works that pussy. With full and complete knowledge and control, but with a gentle mature touch. Fuckin right.

Do you hate PHP? Well this fuck made a Node version? Do you hate Node? Use that shit with pure JS client side. This dude doesn't give a fuck. Don't have a table? Pass that shit JSON and GET A FUCKIN TABLE!!!

Some dipshit in your company needs to edit a database table but there's no way on sweet baby jesus's green earth you're giving that dumb fuck DB creds? Run that dumb fuck up a fully editable admin portal in like 5 fucking minutes because fuck him.

There are few things in my life I love. My corgi and my kids, and most days my wife.

But always fucking DATATABLES.

So, Allen Jardine... just wanted to give you and your product DataTables and Editor a fucking devRant shout out. It continues to be the one ray of light that works as expected and is extremely well supported when it doesn't and some days I just need that fucking consistency in my life man. So thanks.

Me: ya hi, we integrated with your API and I'm receiving error x
Provider: ok we'll disable validation, plz check
Me: ya it works, what's the problem? I used a GUID for id and I'm sure it's unique, here is URL and request body
Provider: you have something wrong in your implementation. Fix it and it will work
Me: aaand what's the wrong part of my implementation?
Provider: id is not unique, fix it. *Hangs up*

I sometimes sit and wonder, how and why does this kind of people get hired, FOR FUCK SAKE YOU ARE THE PROVIDER AND YOU DONT KNOW WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG!
fucking useless ...

Let me tell you how shit flies in Aerospace&Defense companies in certain place in on earth

1. Your dev. PC is isolated from the internet. You can not download any software/library etc directly. "Legal" way takes literally days and you must all effort for it to work. I will not discuss the details of legal way but it is not asking IT team to download it for you, you do it yourself.

2. You use an archaic requirement standard that is somehow used by all other similar companies too. These companies f*ck each other in the arse when they are working on projects together(hiding details from each other which is necessary most of the times etc.) but they were kind to each other when it came to share shitty req. standard.

3. When you try to switch to new requirement standard, you waste weeks only to amend the old one, because everyone is using old one for all projects, so changing it would upset old guards in the company(which are people works in same project for 10 years, no personal development)
4. You came 1 minutes late, you fill the "minutely permission" form.

5. You already work long hours per day and they remove your small breaks during day, because developers use those breaks longer than intended(I wonder what might be the reason...)

6. A technology can not be adopted into current projects even it has objective advantages proven many times in the outer world, because old guards(developers), IT team and configuration management guys(poor man's dev ops role sometimes) can not change their ways.

I hate this shit...

Please, don't take this post seriously. I wrote it from anger.

I hate a lot of humans.

I was at a church today because family ties. I'm agnostic. That sums it up.

And now, I'm at a mall, and it's crowded, and I'm bumping into a lot of people with very low common sense. These fucking apes here have ZERO walk awareness. And a lot of them probably drive, which scares me.

When they make a line in a food shop, and the line gets too big, they curve the line so that the line can continue, like an L, but they leave TOO LITTLE GODDAMN SPACE TO WALK THROUGH!

There's a narrow ramp, next to some stairs, that I use to get to the nursery of the mall, but it also leads to the bathrooms. A lot of these disgusting beings use the ramp. Jesus fucking christ, USE THE SHITTIN FUCKING STAIRS.

tiday I was walking with the stroller the 9 month old which was (thank you alpha omega) sleeping.

I see one of those nice comfy couches, and there's a couple hugging in it but there's an empty spot. I come closer and it's occupied by their trash, some cups with ice cream.
I could not believe my eyes.
That shit's expensive. I would never leave shit with ice cream in my couch, and it's also a horrible gesture because it looks like you're denying it from others with your trash.

I just stared the trash down like really disappointed. They took the trash but I moved on because I was very salty at that point.

I find a seat next to a dad and his kid. I sit down, relieved. His daughter comes over, and almost yelling complains about him buying his brother.
I stared this little shit straight in her face because she could wake up my kid. She and her family was totally oblivious.

These are just minor events, but I come across a plethora of situations like this every day, like people turning on their turn lights 1/2 second before turning, or people that I meet on the street giving me fucking advice on raising kids.

That's the average mall experience. It's a place where selfful people thrive.

I shit you not, sometimes I imagine that a meteor strikes earth and while it makes me sad that all the people I consider kind will die, I orgasm at the thought of these filthy parasites just evaporating.

But then I realize that I'm being very cruel and intolerant. And feel guilty.

Sometimes I think that I should live in Japan or a similar place.
Japanese city people are very organized.
But then I remember that Japan has a suicide problem. And that it has a poverty problem. And a lot of outcasts. And that they barely have sex.
i dunno.

Diary of an insane lead dev: day 447

pdf thumbnails that the app generates are now in S3 instead of saved on disk.

when they were on disk, we would read them from disk into a stream and then create a stream response to the client that would then render the stream in the UI (hey, I didn't write it, I just had to support it)

one of my lazy ass junior devs jumps on modifying it before I can; his solution is to retrieve the file from the cloud now, convert the stream into a base64 encoded string, and then shove that string into an already bloated viewmodel coming from the server to be rendered in the UI.

i'm like "why on earth are you doing that? did you even test the result of this and notice that rendering those thumbnails now takes 3 times as long???"

jr: "I mean, it works doesn't it?"

seriously, if the image file is already hosted on the cloud, and you can programmatically determine its URL, why wouldn't you just throw that in the src attribute in your html tag and call it a day? why would you possibly think that the extra overhead of retrieving and converting the file before passing it off to the UI in an even larger payload than before would result in a good user experience for the client???

it took me all of 30 seconds to google and find out that AWS SDK has a method to GetPreSignedURL on a private file uploaded to s3 and you can set when it expires, and the application is dead at the end of the year.

JFC. I hate trying to reason with these fuckheads by saying "you are paid for you brain, fucking USE IT" because, clearly these code monkeys do not have brains.

!dev-ish

I hate whenever people take hobbies and other things that aren't personality traits and try to make it a personality trait.

Your sexuality isn't a personality trait.
Your diet (looking at you *obnoxious* vegans) isn't a personality trait.
Coding isn't a personality trait.
Your race isn't a personality trait.

I'mma end this rant with a !rant tho.

I know they're obnoxious asf but oh my God mechanical keyboards are one of the most amazing sounds on this earth. Sometimes I'll type just to hear that beautiful sound.

I hate it when I vent to someone about something and I get some woke ass shit advice about how I should "just understand" the people who initiated the bad behavior. Goddamn holy maggots like you are the reason why the world is a fucking shitshow. You're so deep into your martyr image that you disregard the fact that people are abusive and will get away with whatever they can get away with.

If I can get away with murder, how much body count do think that would be? Every dickhole in town will drop dead including me. Well then maybe you should "just understand" me since I'm so sick of the unnecessary hostility of every arrogant developer I work with, every entitled peasant I run into, and every styro-brain hipster avocado-fucker I interact with.

People like this feel more invincible every time they get away with something. Just another incel clit-dick aiming for the moody asshole genius image. Let me whisper gently into your ear, "You're a code monkey and nothing more. If you died today, people will just be annoyed of the backlogs you left behind. No one's even gonna care about your stupid website. You will serve your only purpose, a human fertilizer, and my tomato plants are gonna love you."

"Oh, at least that's all he did." Every fucked up criminal on Earth has a backstory and always, they start with something small. Every stomach-turning crime scene is preceded by a number of people dismissing "small" incidents of abuse.

Fuck you.

I know there's no solution to this that wouldn't cause more problems because all humans seem to do is exploit whatever they can get their hands on but I hate how through technology, anyone can create entirely new identities to stalk and harass others. From the shit maggots and incels who vomit dumb shit or act aggressive online to the disturbing, obssessive, should-have-been-removed-from-the-gene-pool cowards who stalk you for years, you can't seem to do anything to defend yourself other than to block whatever new accounts they create and carry the paranoia of someone other than Sunblock Mark watching you either through your own portfolio or even GitHub profile.

What life can you still have when you've avoided most types of social media and you get followed around in other sites that are supposed to help your career? There's nothing left for peace aside from being a true hermit. It's just the fact of the internet and the dark side of the lowlives. What can you do about these things? The police wouldn't care if an ex and family members have been stalking you for five years until something physical actually happens. Nevermind the fact that just getting a "hi" from these people is enough to drag you into a trail of nightmares every time you close your eyes on the next few weeks until you hear from them again. Oh, look how harmless, he's just saying "hi". Let's check the spam folder. Oh there it is, the email he sent at 3AM in the morning that he probably figured out you blocked so he created a new email that will go through with the same damn message at 9AM. I've been ignoring him for half a decade and I blocked him? Surely that is not enough to make him stop, he's such a normal person.

No, telling him to stop is not an option. I already told him that several times back in 2015 and he went on and attempted to hack every social media I had. He then went on to "visit" me in my condo and wait by the door. I slept with a knife under my pillow and got the fuck out of that city forever. Stayed the fuck away from Facebook too and still get stalked on LinkedIn and even GitHub for fuck's sake. What can I do? Report him? For what? For saying "hi" too many times? Then you get crap about others having worse problems than you as if this kind of shit isn't killing you on the inside. Let's just overwhelm the people who work on themselves and try to succeed until they remove themselves from the Earth and we're left with the disgusting fuckers who have nothing to do and nothing to contribute.

I know this sounds like a non-problem problem but it really messes with my head and every day, it pisses me off that people like this can't be stopped until they do physical harm. No one cares about the mental damage they cause. No one cares about how disturbing their behaviors are. Now the past haunts me and I keep dreaming I was still in the same shithole I used to live in, dating the same Flowcode abusive engineer, getting even my tomatoes stolen, my family fucking up every tiny glimmer of hope and happiness in me. It's so ridiculous that it's kinda funny.

A few weeks ago, I was watching "Perfect Blue" with my partner. He said I've always been calm in most situations but he's never seen me get so worked up over a movie. This is despite watching morbid true crime, war, paranormal shit, and others. This movie along with the Jessica Jones series, trigger the fucking hell out of me and I'm glad they exist as another genre of horror because they truly are terrifying.

I just hate this. I fucking hate the fact that I have to be the one to do all the work and get therapy when the ones who truly need them are freely doing pathetic shit and possibly harassing others too. Fuck you all, I hope your ding dongs dry up and no child would ever have to bear the nightmare of being around parasites like you.

Right, that's fucking it. Enough. I'm all for learning new technologies, frameworks, and development protocols, but my time on this earth is limited and at the end of the day if I'm having to spend DAYS AND FUCKING DAYS just scouring through obscure forum posts because the documentation is shit and just hitting ONE FUCKING PROBLEM AFTER ANOTHER then there comes a point at which the time investment simply isn't worth it. I HATE throwing in the towel because some FUCKING CUNT code problem has got the better of me, but fucking sense must prevail here.

Laravel fucking Mix. Do any any of you use this shit on Windows? Because I take my fucking hat off to you. I'm done with it.

Oh, so your server uses 'public_html' instead of 'public' does it? Well, of course you can just set

mix.setPublicPath('public_html'); then can't you?

No, you can't. Why? Because fuck you, that's why. Not only do you have to hard-code your fucking public directory into each specified path, additionally you have to set

mix.setPublicPath('./');

Why? Because fuck you, that's why. It took me the best part of two days to discover that little nugget of information, buried at the bottom of some obscure corner of the internet in a random github issue thread. Fuck off.

Onto next problem. Another 5 hours invested to extract some patchy solution that I'm not at all happy with.

Rinse, repeat.

Make it work with BrowserSync by wrapping your assets like so:

<link rel="stylesheet" href="{{ mix('/build/css/main.css') }}">

Oh oh oh but "The Mix manifest does not exist"... despite a fresh install of Laravel 5.6 and all relevant node modules installed... follow some other random Github thread with a back and forth of time-consuming suggestions for avenues of experimentation, with no clear solution.

Er no, fuck off. I'm going back to Grunt and maybe I'll try Webpack/Mix in another year or two when there's actually some clear answers, but as it stands this a wild goose chase into a fucking black-hole and I've got better things to do with my precious time. Go die.

Proxmox team, go fuck yourselves.

Now I'm sure that I'll receive a lot of flack for this, but hear me out.

I've tried Proxmox and was quite pleased with its web UI. But I hate how much it locks me into their own little ecosystem.

I want to use btrfs on my drives. Why is this impossible, yet the hack that is ZoL is your obvious alternative? An alternative wherein I can't even compile and run my own kernel, because then ZoL suddenly fails? And don't you tell me to compile your stock config, when it's well over 15GB large in your source tree.

Proxmox is literally the MacOS of Linux distributions. Which was even more so made clear by me being called an idiot by possibly wanting to run Same on the PVE host. Because why on Earth would sysadmins want to?! Why on Earth would sysadmins be competent for wanting to?!!

You know what? I'll just convert those Proxmox servers to Arch and say fuck you to all the bells and whistles that's Proxmox' web UI. Because at least Arch allows me to make my own fucking choices, limited only by what's supported by the Linux operating system.

Perhaps Proxmox will consider btrfs stable in 2021. Because you know, despite it being stable today in 2018, Debian and Proxmox alike live 3 years in the past, i.e. 2015. I hate the Debian ecosystem because of that, but boy do I hate Proxmox even more so. Bloody fucking piece of shit it is!!! 😡

These ignorant comments about arch are starting to get on my nerves.

You ranted or asked help about something exclusive to windows and someone pointed out they don't have that problem in arch and now you're annoyed?

Well maybe it's for good.

Next comes a very rough analogy, but imagine if someone posts "hey guys, I did a kg of coke and feeling bad, how do I detox?"

It takes one honest asshole to be like "well what if you didn't do coke?".

Replace the coke with windows.
Windows is a (mostly) closed source operating system owned by a for profit company with a very shady legal and ethical history.

What on earth could possibly go wrong?

Oh you get bsod's?
The system takes hours to update whenever the hell it wants, forces reboot and you can't stop it?
oh you got hacked because it has thousands of vulnerabilities?
wannacry on outdated windows versions paralyzed the uk health system?

oh no one can truly scrutinize it because it's closed source?

yet you wonder why people are assholes when you mention it? This thing is fucking cancer, it's hundreds of steps backwards in terms of human progress.

and one of the causes for its widespread usage are the savage marketing tactics they practiced early on. just google that shit up.

but no, linux users are assholes out to get you.

and how do people react to these honest comments? "let's make a meme out of it. let's deligitimize linux, linux users and devs are a bunch of neckbeards, end of story, watch this video of rms eating skin off his foot on a live conference"

short minded idiots.

I'm not gonna deny the challenges or limitations linux represents for the end user.

It does take time to learn how to use it properly.
Nvidia sometimes works like shit.
Tweaking is almost universally required.
A huge amount of games, or Adobe/Office/X products are not compatible.
The docs can be very obscure sometimes (I for one hate a couple of manpages)

But you get a system that:
* Boots way faster
* Is way more stable
* Is way way way more secure.
* Is accountable, as in, no chance to being forced to get exploited by some evil marketing shit.

In other words, you're fucking free.
You can even create your own version of the system, with total control of it, even profit with it.

I'm not sure the average end user cares about this, but this is a developer forum, so I think in all honesty every developer owes open source OS' (linux, freebsd, etc) major respect for being free and not being corporate horseshit.

Doctors have a hippocratic oath? Well maybe devs should have some form of oath too, some sworn commitment that they will try to improve society.

I do have some sympathy for the people that are forced to use windows, even though they know ideally isn't the ideal moral choice.
As in, their job forces it, or they don't have time or energy to learn an alternative.

At the very least, if you don't know what you're talking about, just stfu and read.

But I don't have one bit of sympathy for the rest.

I didn't even talk about arch itself.
Holy fucking shit, these people that think arch is too complicated.

What in the actual fuck.

I know what the problem is, the arch install instructions aren't copy paste commands.
Or they medium tutorial they found is outdated.

So yeah, the majority of the dev community is either too dumb or has very strong ADD to CAREFULLY and PATIENTLY read through the instructions.

I'll be honest, I wouldn't expect a freshman to follow the arch install guide and not get confused several times.
But this is an intermediate level (not megaexpert like some retards out there imply).

Yet arch is just too much. That's like saying "omg building a small airplane is sooooo complicated". Yeah well it's a fucking aerial vehicle. It's going to be a bit tough. But it's nowhere near as difficult as building a 747.

So because some devs are too dumb and talk shit, they just set the bar too low.

Or "if you try to learn how to build a plane you'll grow an aviator neckbeard". I'll grow a fucking beard if I want too.

I'm so thankful for arch because it has a great compromise between control and ease of install and use.

When I have a fresh install I only get *just* what I fucking need, no extra bullshit, no extra programs I know nothing about or need running on boot time, and that's how I boot way faster that ubuntu (which is way faster than windows already).

Configuring nvidia optimus was a major pain in the ass? Sure was, but I got it work the way I wanted to after some time.

Upgrading is also easy as pie, so really scratching my brain here trying to understand the real difficult of using arch.

So I just installed Android 11 on my OnePlus 6T with the 18.0 release of LineageOS. Screen recorder built-in that can finally record system sound and play it too (there used to be a Magisk module but that couldn't play system sound while recording it, everything else is just through the mic) and some doodads like the selection for where to blast your music into has been moved more into view... Epic.

And then comes the Scoped Storage. Oh boy were the Android devs right to hate the guts out of it. It's so fucking slow. Seriously, on that exact device with Android 10, blazing fast. That storage is far from cooked. On Android 11.. have a directory with a thousand or so files, and it takes 5 goddamn seconds to open the directory with them in it. And even with external file managers that you give storage access like usual! Except when you root your device and use a root file manager, then it's fast again. Because that's using the shell instead.

I never thought I'd be able to say this to be honest. The shell is faster than the native tools. Let that sink in for a moment. The shell is faster than the native tools. How on Earth did Google think that this is tolerable?! For security, are you kidding me? Yeah I'll just use the root account for fucking everything in all that security, to have a functioning system!

Android 10 was also initially planned to have this terrible storage system, but due to developer backlash, Google waited a release and it was optional there. That wasn't just time for developers to adapt to Scoped Storage. That should've also been time for Google to actually make it usable.

Why the *fuck* did Facebook decide to nag users by constantly reminding them of how dumb and miserable they are by showing the old-ass posts from years and years ago?? I don't want to see some random shotpost i posted 5 years ago, i don't give a fuck!!
How the hell uses this anyway? Who on earth cares about his facebook image so much, that sharing this stuff is actually meaningful?

Maybe i'm missing a point, but again my facebook profile is just a wall of memes and vapid shit that i don't care about.
I'm starting to really fucking hate facebook in every way, too bad its the only real way to contact people here in scandinavia...
This country is full of applefags anyway, maybe i should just pack up and move to a country with a more sensible communication platform :D

Now that my math posts have failed to garner the anger they formerly did, we here at Wisecrack Studios, like all teams of people completely out of ideas, have come up with a brilliant never-before-tried concept to bring fresh shitposts to your pocket-telescreen this fine year of 2020.

We present to you the DevRant shitposter census!

Yes we pride ourselves in our quality bait and bullshit here at WS. Founded in [previous year a long long time ago], we focus on craftmanship, tradition, and doing it right. Our bait is loved the world over for "it's fresh flavor", "so good, it's like you're abusing heroin right along with the company employees!'

And now, you too get to participate and choose your very own bullshit!
You could say we may have invented a totally new word just to describe it: crowdsourcing!
Isn't it just *brilliant*.

Here is Wisecrack's "Private Select" census, of only the most choice *premium* finely-aged shitpost ideas for this [current year].

Please, please, one vote per customer!

* Moar javascript shitposts (no we won't be doing any more, even WE are tired of js rants).

* Overly pixelated memes (obviously not) blatantly ripped and automatically uploaded via shitty selenium scripts

* Real life hijinxs, trolling shitty companies hiring processes for fun at their expense!

* DevRantCon now with 100% more orgies. Reserve your kickstarter ticket today.

* Disappointing vaporware announcements that take ten minutes to read and build your excitement up only to crush it before your very eyes like a child's first lego build in the hands of an angry nd merciless andre the giant disappointed by the craftmanship of a five year old.

* A livestream of a monkey on an actual typewriter, with a btc betting pool each time an actual word is typed, along with a $5 "shock the monkey" button to spice things up a bit
(our lawyers are informing us this may or may not be illegal in some or all nations. We'll get back to you when sealand responds with our request about their laws on unnecessary animal cruelty. )

* Video conference with devrants creators where we all play "I've never" that doesn't end until at least one person passes out black drunk.

* Weekly comedy write ups with jokes (not obviously) blatantly stolen from cards against humanity

* HipsterRants: why your favorite [thing - game, music, movie, book] sucks, and why I hate you for liking it.

* Did we mention javascript rants?

* Cool new projects by devranters and our merciless breakdown of why each one is pure, unadulterated shit, everything that was done wrong, and why you should personally be ashamed for using it.

* SadRants: cancer, meth abuse, homelessness, how we'll all die at the end, and how the sun will one day turn into a giant ball of fire that will consume the earth and leave no trace that anyone ever existed, and nothing we do will ultimately matter.

* HappyRants: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) oh yeah, you feeling it now mr krabs?

* Technical breakdowns that are completely wrong, utterly incompetent, intentionally misleading, and wildly upvoted by people who are unfamiliar.

Vote for your favorite topic/idea today! or even submit your own for our 'consideration'!

Clickbait, now in technicolor!

Just remembered that I still had a foobar invite link in my email inbox 😋

The challenges are odd though, first challenge was super easy (basically an idiot check), but while I was able to convert 3 cans of energy drink into a functional solution in half an hour, the verification utility is not very verbose at all. So in Python 3.7.3 in my Debian box it worked just fine, yet the testing suite in Foobar was failing the whole time. After sending an email to my friend that gave the link (several years ago now, sorry about that! 😅) asking if he knew the problem, I found out that Google is still using Python 2.7.13 for some reason. Even Debian's Python is newer, at 2.7.16. To be fair it does still default to Python 2 too. But why.. why on Earth would you use Python 2.7 in a developer oriented set of challenges from a massive company, in 2020 when Python 2 has already been dead for almost a whole year?

But hey now that it's clear that it's Python 2.7, at least the next challenges should be a bit easier. Kind of my first time developing in SnekLang regardless actually, while the language doesn't have everything I'd expect (such as integer square root, at least not in Debian or the foobar challenge's interpreter), its math expressions are a lot cleaner than bash's (either expr or bc). So far I kinda like the language. 2-headed snake though and there's so much garbage for this language online, a lot more than there is for bash. I hate that. Half the stuff flat out doesn't work because it was written by someone who requires assistance to breathe.

Meh, here's to hoping that the next challenges will be smooth sailing :) after all most of the time spent on the first one (17.5 hours) was bottling up a solution for half an hour, tearing my hair out for a few hours on why Google's bloody verification tool wouldn't accept my functioning code (I wrote it for Python 3, assuming that that's what Google would be using), and 10 hours of sleep because no Google, I'm not scrubbing toilets for 48 hours. It's fair to warn people but no, I'm not gonna work for you as a cleaning lady! 😅

Other than the issues that the environment has, it's very fun to solve the challenges though. Fuck the theoretical questions with the whiteboard, all hiring processes should be like this!

40 minutes into trying to switch my Apple hbo account to my supposedly ‘free’ AT&T account... I hate Apple... fuck you... I hate ATT... I hate HBO... I don’t even really want to watch this stupid super hero movie... even if it might have an interesting political angle...

Oh. It worked. Never mind. Everything is fine. The dopamine covered up all of the anger and life can just keep on getting pushed a few inches a day until I slide off of the edge of the earth...

I'm starting to FUCKing hate those 1-5 lines minified 3rdparty javascript snippets that everyone seems to be bombarding their website with.

Why on gods ungodly earth would you ever dream of injecting this kind of style into my <head> tag.
Without any warning whatsoever.

You couldn't be FUCKing bothered to be thinking about the consequences, before pushing such an update to your production server.
That's how you leave your users website broken, or ugly af.

I know it's an easy fix, simply remove the snippet that injects this crap, if only I was allowed to say "no don't keep this FUCKing crap" to the customer.

When you hate every fucking thing on earth and want to kill everyone on this fucked up planet.
That bug didnt fix. Fuck you.
The client needs answer now. Fuck you.
Stackoverflow user marked it as duplicate. Fuck you in particular.
Fuuuuuuuccckkkkkkkkkk every fucking asshole.

If there's one thing I hate about devs is definitely when they get too emotional about the reviews they receive.

Doing a thorough review always takes significant amount of time and energy. It's about ensuring high quality of code, about functionality and best practices, ... It's also about learning: I learn from the changes being reviewed while at the same time I also try to teach the author as much as possible, giving down to earth opinions.

It's never (or at least should never be) about attacking the author. There really is no reason why someone would spend all this time getting overly personal.

I used to start my responses with (lousy) apologies for being "harsh", but stopped doing this now that my team understands all of this. It also helped asking them to do the same with my changes. The look in their eyes when they find something is simply invaluable :).

Android Crash is Fucking Bullshit Ever on this Earth Planet.
I really Hate these Number of Versions and Bullshit Incompatibility between each one.

It is Just a Shit Developed on Java.

The Crash Really Fucks the eyes of Developer.

And Fucking Bullshit Errors are not Even visible, Sometimes the shit goes so worst that it does'nt even give the Line Number where error Exists.

Worst OS Developed for Mobile on This Planet.

Anyone getting into these development i suggest IONIC is Best to start instead of Coding Native Bullshit Android.

If anyone knows how to see the realtime errors besides Logcat and Firebase Error please let me know.

!dev

I fucking hate with all the strength in my body this meme format:

nobody:
someone: wacky unpredictible quote

fuck that bitch ass, lazy, unfunny, uncreative format. It fucking sucks dick. It's not funny!

Jesus fucking christ, it was funny the first month.
But month after month after month, this fucking thing won't die. It's way way below the average meme format, and that's saying a lot considering what the average is.

I check youtube comments and for every funny and thoughtful comment there's one from these fucking idiots that shouldn't be alive parrotting this unfunny shit.

Just include the goddamn fucking quote, that's it.

Even less points to the motherfuckers that write:
nobody
not one on person on earth
not even a single person on the universe
person: <quote>
those deserve the worst type of cancers or torture forms described in wikipedia.

This is a stuxnet level post, I need to get a life.

As a techie how loves the climate, I feel like I am living two life's. On one hand, I want to protect my earth, but than I make a app, and Evan though I buy offsets, what about all of the users. Why was I born this way, and can the natural and the man-made coexist? That is the question I must ask myself all day. I am looking to drone powered climate research in a effort to prove to my self they benefit each other, but I just can't. I fucking hate my life rn