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Search - "piece of art"
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I call this piece of art ":(".
Featuring "MEMORY_MANAGEMENT", "CRITICAL_STRUCTURE_CORRUPTION" and "REFERENCE_BY_POINTER"19 -
The amount of much political correctness in the dev community just pisses me off sometimes.
I've watched "Use the right tool / language for the job" has become *THE* excuse for shitty tools and languages.
Case in point -- JavaScript. If you want to make a website that interacts with the end user, the right tool is JavaScript. But that's because IT'S THE ONLY TOOL. Does that make it a *good* tool?
HELL NO.
/midranttimeout
Brendan Eich, I forgive you. You had 10 days and a corporation on your case.
That's not saying JavaScript doesn't have some good things in it. It does. But "Javascript the good parts" is a fucking thin book.
Sure, some amazing things have been written in JavaScript. Great communities have coalesced around this cancer.
BUT THATS IN SPITE OF JAVASCRIPT, NOT BECAUSE OF IT. AS A LANGAUGE IT'S STILL A STEAMING PILE OF DOGSHIT.
A master can draw great art with a shitty piece of charcoal. That doesn't make charcoal THE BEST DRAWING TOOL EVARRR. It's just a testament to the master's craft.
If you started your programming journey with JavaScript, do expand your horizons.
Break free from Stockholm's syndrome.
Discard your cognitive dissonance.
See JavaScript for what it is -- a shitty language everyone was forced to use.
PS: Don't even get me started on Java ...24 -
Fucking piece of shit German internet man. Some of you might know that Germany probably has the shittiest internet in the EU. And by shitty, I don't mean the downstream speeds you can get (which is how most ISPs justify their crappy network), but the GODDAMN UPSTREAM SPEEDS.
See, I'm just a student, right? I don't run a fucking company or something like that. I don't need / can't afford a symmetrical gigabit connection. But I do a lot of stuff that requires a decent upstream connection.
Fucking Unitymedia (my ISP), if I already decide to buy the goddamn "business plan" (IPv6 & static adresses), at least supply me with some decent upstream speeds. PLEASE!
My current plan costs ~45€ a month for internet and TV (I don't watch, but my two other flat-mates do).
Internet speeds are 150 Mbit/s down and FUCKING 10 Mbit/s up! What??! What the hell am I supposed to do with only 10 Mbit/s?? I'm already completely exhausting the bandwidth and I'm not even done setting everything up! Fucking hell...
I was planning on getting their "upload package" to get at least 20 Mbit/s up – but they removed that option! IT'S GONE, PEOPLE! They said in an interview last year that "customers are not interested in higher upload speeds" and consequently removed that option. WHAT???
"You wanna have state-of-the-art downstream speeds of 400 Mbit/s? Here you go. Oh, our maximum limit of 10 Mbit/s upstream is not enough for you? TOO FUCKING BAD, NOTHING THAT WE CAN OFFER YOU!"
(Seriously though, the best customer internet plan is 400D & 10U)
Goddamn... in this day and age of things like cloud storage etc. even "normal" people definitely need higher upload speeds.
Man, this rant got so long, but I really wanted to get this out. This wasn't even everything though, maybe I'll make a separate rant to elaborate on other issues.
If you are interested, you might want to read up on the following report:
https://speedtest.net/reports/...33 -
Why is it so hard to just build machines that work without all this ideological bullshit? Code doesn't care if politics==true. The world is scary enough without you assholes making modern life a data minefield for even the most educated experts, and taking advantage of the ignorance of everyone else. Fuck you.
I just wanna <look at web pages> without having to consider, counteract, or silently assist some fucking regime. Why is EVERYTHING this way? Everything is a back door or a data mine or a political statement? This isn't a fucking art piece! It's not your espionage tool, fucking codes in invisible ink and tiny cameras and shit everywhere! It's a <web browser>, and if it does ANYTHING besides <browse the web> that I didn't explicitly tell it to do, you better better not be the one who made it. Because if you did, you are what's wrong with the world.6 -
Warning: pretty sad thoughts. If you're having a blast of a day, please skip. It's for your own good.
That feeling when you finish watching a piece of art. Be it a film or anime or anything. You're confused why you feel good, but at the same time you're hurt. You smile but the pain is still there when you reflect on the feelings and the experiences you had and you realise that none of it will ever happen again. No art or any of the past will happen again exactly the same way how you felt and experienced.
You think of the best friend you once had. Think of the girl you held hands with and time stopped. The first time you embraced her and knew you loved her more than anything, even if she didn't know your feelings. Think of your first kiss. Your first serious relationship. The last time you saw your parents, your wife, your children, family.
Now look at the perspective of the future and the past you: blissfully ignoring the certain end to all experiences until they all abruptly end reminding you of this and it hurts. Damn it hurts.
I will never be able to see me best friend again, nor will I ever be able to hold hands with her either. First time I kissed is now long gone. It's almost like you wish you were aware of how valuable and important the experience was and to not just throw it away like the last time and the several times before that. But the sad part is, you don't know which experience will make you realise how much you missed it.
But even if you do realise by placing yourself in the place of your future self, and you cherish the experience, you blame yourself because you could have either avoided it's end or did something better.
Like your break up: could it be fixed? Was it worth the little time you have on this plante?
Like your friends argument you had: could you have done better? Could you have stopped it?
Like your parent's death: could you have been a better son to your now overworked dying mum? Could you see how hard they tried even though you thought they were total dicks?
Now you realise that literally anything you do, you will have a problem with somewhere down the line. You're destined to be sad shattered and broken by every day that is tragedy.
But it's similar to art. After all, your life is a piece of art about how you died. Which is why you smile and enjoy the last second of the experience which you just had. That chest warming feeling will only last a little. You smile through pain, yet you realise its not the end.
Then again, its just my thoughts that i need to vent. Take it with a pinch of salt.8 -
Coming back here after years to rant about... myself.
TLDR: I fucked up and now have to call a thousand people as a dev, I'm not even getting paid for it and they all get crazy about a random ID that got assigned to them, so now I want to throw away all my electronics and become a skilift operator.
Stupid me deployed a project shortly before we have the largest amount of orders in the year. (Like 90% of yearly orders in a couple minutes cause they are sold out fast and people wait to order first)
I got this horrible legacy "plain self written framework php" project which I tried to upgrade state of the art.
There was one piece missing to upgrade everything and nicely deploy it to some fresh new servers which can handle the high load which peaks at the time orders open.
So I did it the day before orders open and... everything worked well! Nothing crashed.
I wrote my client to wait a little before he confirms the orders, since after confirmation each of the people who ordered will receive an email where they can choose a unique number which they'll receive as a sticker with the order.
Since it's an event my client is promoting, people will meet each other wearing those unique stickers and being able to identify each other online and in person with this number.
Suddenly my clients call me that "customers are complaining about that there is something wrong"
Turned out he confirmed all orders straight away and that part of the application which makes the number unique was broken on the update.
So everyone could chose any number (also taken ones) as his "unique" number.
In my panic, I told my client "It's my mistake, I'll deal with it of course and call the affected people in my free time, since it's my mistake you don't have to pay for it". (it's my largest client by far, am a freelancer)
Realizing when people can chose any number it'll not be a few ones who have the same, it's like almost everyone did chose "69", "1", "420", "88 (a scary amount of people)",... (with 69 being the number being chosen by most people btw, even more then "1")
So now I have to call about a thousand people telling them a new random ID will be assigned to them. I thought of course about mailing them, wrote a script that deals with the issue automatically, and FUCKED IT UP TOO so everyone is confused and the only way to deal with it is by a call basically.
And while I'm sitting here now for 2 days straight calling people in my free time about their random ID will have to change, I realized that some people are quite crazy about random ID's.
I'm talking about yelling and threatening because "is it too much to ask for a working website when ordering this expensive product".
I hate my life right now and am getting quite serious about throwing all my electronic devices away and become a skilift operator instead. Fuck the higher pay, it's not worth the shit, I wanna have only responsibility about one button to press while watching people fall on their face.5 -
Do you ever wonder why EVEN Microsoft uses web technologies to build apps for Windows?
Because the StAte oF tHe aRt piece of shit WINUI 3 (aka Project Reunion aka Windows App SDK aka Microsoft 12th app framework in this decade) can't handle a basic save/open dialog.
An issue has been opened 2 fucking years ago and still no fix. (Other than write 250 lines of c# and c++ to get a fucking dialog)
Fuck this I'm going back to Electron.5 -
was looking up some code, won't say which, trying to find something, won't say what, and, heck, I need to find out who wrote and maintains this awesome piece of art. After a couple hours of stalking done, yep, that's how good it was, I finally found the author and guess what? They died two years ago, 24 years old. Dead. Gone. A little more stalking and the punchline was: suicide.
FUCK, I don't even know them but it makes me real sad. It seems this' an actual issue in our line of work24 -
Some fegit: "test you"
*fegit sends outbound Facebook link to some Paki website*
(why not a direct link you moron?)
Fegit: "go."
Me (thinking): *what the fuck does this idiot want from me*
Me: "What makes you think that we want to prove ourselves to you by us doing your dirty work? We are not your personal army, so please fuck right off."
Fegit: "look out ya window"
Ehm yeah sure.. as if there's anything there. You'll need more than that to threaten me.
Me: "Anything to see there?"
Fegit: …
Fucking piece of shit. Look out your window you say. Wanna give it a try? To someone who masters the art of wrangling the angry pixies? I don't need a gun to kill people, you know ^^
Oh well. At least it wasn't a "plz huk Phasebuk" question I guess ¯\_(ツ)_/¯5 -
STOP FORCING ME TO REIR ART YOU PIECE OF SHIT.
I've officially decided to make the change to linux. Can anyone recommend me a good distribution? Is there anything like homestead with all necessary tools already installed? Any help to get me started on using Linux as a daily driver is welcome, thanks 👌23 -
Separation of concerns is a beautiful thing.
JSX is fucking ugly. Fuck that shit. I hate JSX with a passion.
Here is one. Did you know that the digestive system works really hard to digest the food eaten?
How about we blend all the food before consuming it? Take a blender and add a cup of coffee, add some salad, add a piece of cake, a few slices of pizza, hot sauce and for good measure add some juice, or whatever-you-eat-for-lunch.
After all, all that food is going to get mixed anyway. This is more efficient!
No? Why not? Because it's ugly, highly unappetizing, disgusting even, and it takes away the pleasure of eating, the enjoyment of a good meal.
That in a nutshell is JSX: mashing up everything together under the pretext of efficiency.
Web development not only is an art, but above all must be enjoyable to those who devote their lives to it. And ugly ain't gonna cut it.11 -
I got travel advertisments on my Windows 10 lock screen. I didn't remember how to get rid of them, so I had to search for it again. I was lead to this piece of fine irony on my screen.
Staring at it felt like staring at the concept of art while it's staring back. This experience left me emotional.
Thank you Microsoft and Windows Central. Thank you art, life, and love. Thank you ads.5 -
Looking a pr I found this piece of art in a css file:
width: 86.3624%;
Me: "something feels off about this."
Colleague: "Again with your readability bs?"
Me: *looks at the camera, perplexed* (The camera as in: I'm in a sitcom, not as pair programming)15 -
Sooo I’m typically a proponent of physical copy of books, as I’d rather sit and read them, write and take notes. Essentially all my books turn into something out of the “half blood prince” potions book from Harry Potter.
But it’s so inconvenient as either my books are in my office or in the library at home. It ends up being something like connecting a USB... the book I need at the time is always in the opposite place I am in currently.
Also, all the books I want now are newer and none are on the used market. For a reasonable price.
So I gave in a bought an iPad with the hopes of putting the books in pdf form on it... I’ll pay for some PDFs but hey if I can get it free thru a google search then it is what it is lol.
Not sure how I’m gonna adapt to reading on a tablet, as I really prefer a physical book.. hell I still use national brand computation notebooks for all my notes. Nothing beats writing it down, AND I still have an IBM selectric 3 and Swintec, nothing beats sitting down and just letting the thoughts flow neatly on a piece of paper and then glueing it the notebook
Anyway whatcha y’alls thoughts of using an iPad as a digital library of books.. using the Apple Pencil to annotate the book. I bought the 12.9 inch as the screen size is closest to a sheet of paper
Also, I don’t read fiction all the books I read are nonfiction, reference manuals, textbooks, data sheets, user manuals, stuff like the art of computer programming by knuth, Kent beck, Robert Martin, folwler books, etc14 -
Hopefully, you already know that the company controlled by the alledged reptiloid subhuman and olimpic testicle juggler formerly known as Mister Zuck My Tits is not to be trusted.
But as is always the case in this bitch, I've been forced into cowjizz flooded swamps' worth of stinking shit platforms for the sake of avoiding isolation.
And so, I've just found yet another way in which Facebook **THUNDERSTRIKE** ... the company, not the geriatric ward, is one of the CROWN ACHIEVEMENTS of human civilization.
Let me tell you something: some people are fucking broke. Hell, some people sleep on the streets, live on scraps, and willingly engage in acts of public defecation when provoked. But I'm not even talking about them no, just plain *broke*.
And so imagine being that guy who doesn't really use his phone much, except maybe for sharing cat pictures with mom because that's what being an absolute chad is all about. You don't get a new phone, because money is a __little__ bit tight. But THEN...
The dreaded CAPITAL strikes, and requests of you to bend and fall onto your knees so as to provide intense, intimate and manual -- as well as oral -- PLEASURE to the [NOT SO] METAPHORICAL PENIS of the """SYSTEM""".
Oh, what an abominable, drooooooling revenant that lies before you!
"Gimme your ass... " he says, menacingly, as you wail about in a futile attempt to guard and preserve the very last vestiges of your own anal virginity.
And so you fight, and kick him in the NADS with everything you have, down to the final shreds of vigor. Victory! Or so you thought...
"You must... " he mutters, mortally wounded "update WhatsApp... "
"Still you breathe?!" you exclaim, suddenly transformed into a heroic, sexy moustachoed arquebusier "After I'm done ~OILING~ my VICTORIOUS CHEST, I *shall* bestow DEATH uppon you!".
But as you rip open your shirt to apply sensual oiling to your marvellous frontal assets, your nemesis reveals it's portentous Portugal: "this new version of Android... " he gasps as he perishes "is incompatible with your device... "
"Ughh! Sacrebleu!" you shriek out in pain, realizing that you are now unable to ACCESS THE FUCKING DATA THAT IS IN YOUR OWN FUCKING HARDWARE BECAUSE OF A STUPID FORCED BINARY INCOMPATIBILITY.
That's right. Now even if I *do* get a new phone, I can't do shit about losing all of the family memes. And contacts and all of that shit, but the stickers are more important. A minor inconvenience, yes, and it didn't need all of this preamble but I was doing the dramatic fight scene bit inside my head as I was writing and I got into it.
Because the only documented way to transfer all of that data is to OPEN THE APPLICATION and scan some code, but everytime I go to do that, IT TELLS ME I NEED TO UPDATE. And every time I GO TO UPDATE, it says that MY PHONE is TOO FUCKING OLD!! AAAAAAAGHGHGHGHGHGHGHG!!!!
And you too, might be a dashing french man from centuries past, with both balls and tits down to your fucking knees, folding your arms in a position that exhumes smugness in a disgustingly irreverent and self-aggrandizing way, looking at me as a mere plebeian who cannot wrap his head around the mystical art of interacting with Google's black deuce box.
And you would be somewhat right in your judgement! But just having to fiddle about with these fucking pocket Elmo screens is such a traumatic experience for me that I'd rather lose my stickers.
[ADBREAK] Are you a debonair victorian undercover butt pirate, taking unparalleled care of your Falstaffian, highfalutin poils pubiens? Need your "sword" sharpened, as you browse through the pages of this magnanimous lexicon? Would you rather allocate final death to your coworkers than learn one more synonym for sonorous, supercilious and pontifical?
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Get your bottle of scents, sensual Portuguese chest oils, and fucking designer-drug bath salts for the low, low price of a passionate, unceassing self-blowjob! And use my code FRONTALASSETS for 60% OFF in your next soul-robbing foray into the felational dark arts!
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:~11 -
I know this sounds odd, but I really find algorithms things of delightful beauty.
A creative solution to some very deceptively complex problems.
Sure, some implementations aren't the best, but seeing them after just makes me appreciate the time and effort that must have gone into designing things like Merge Sort, Binary Search, Greedy Algorithms, BST, and Dijkstra's Algorithm.
So! If your code is unoptimal, looks terrible, or is a sheer abomination, take a moment to appreciate the little piece of art you've made before you go and make it better.1 -
Regex are one of the finest art piece in software.
Had a 2 hour class and even after that I think you can spend months on mastering it.
It's not something I haven't used but we undermine whole beauty of how random characters can form formula and extract complicated pattern.
Kleene we owe you.2 -
Today I want to put an age-old question to rest. What is art and what is not? What's the difference? In art world, there is actually a consensus that was reached in the second half of 20th century.
First, the audience has no merit to decide what's art and what's not, as art has inherent characteristics. So whether a piece is art or not is left for the artist to decide.
But the artist too cannot just call anything they make art. There is just one criterion — if only the art piece itself is enough to justify its making, and the artist sees it as the only award they need for making it, it's art. Otherwise, it's not.
"But wait, that's not entirely correct, this is incomplete", you say. Well, it's in fact complete, but because our society progressed way faster than our languages, we're having a hard time to describe novel complex things with words. Language can't keep up with rising complexity.
We use "horseless carriages" instead of "cars" when we describe anything complex enough. The good explanation of how language works and why do we act like this is outlined beautifully in Benjamin Bratton's "The New Normal". A small book of forty-something pages, but I never spent that much time on every page in my life. The best book investment for me after "The Code Complete".22 -
Long story short:
My system need to talk with a 3rd party PoS API. The provided doc is pretty useless and with few errors.. nonetheless I came to finish the 99% of the job.
I was stuckd on the 1%, one frickin function.
Everytime I would call the endpoint I would receive...NOTHING. Just a 200.
I've spent like 5 hours trying everything, even sending wrong params...nothing...
Always 200 and nothing else.
Apparently, for an entire nation and the IT Company behind them, is ok to have A PAYMENT API TO RETURN VOID AND A 200 NO MATTER WHAT.
I got the luck/unluck that the main developer of such piece of art came in the office and I've almost throw him out the window (we are at 26th floor).
FUCK OFF DUDE. YOU AND ALL THE OTHERS THAT DO LIKE YOU DO.
P.S. in this days I'll try to write the full story, but it's hard without giving many details...small anticipation: 1.5 months of work and nothing but red bull and coffee...4 -
“Lazy mom lazy wow” presented by Gail Swanlund was probably the most impactful piece of art to me.
Through simplistic form, this art piece presents the idea of caring about oneself and quit the eternal rat race for money. But somehow for its metaphor, Lazy mom lazy wow chooses the notion and aesthetics of death and decay. The closest analogy I can think of is the music of American Football. Some kind of liminal, eerie aesthetics. Also, the movie Gummo and the game Life is Strange, part one.
The piece deliberately avoids being aggressive and celebrating its notion. It’s not “quit the rat race and celebrate because life is so good”, it’s “quit the rat race by putting yourself into coma so nothing matters anymore”. The descent into eternal comfort of realization that you don’t have to do anything anymore, but also sorrow of losing meaning.
It feels like launching Counter-Strike Source in the year 2051, only to walk around cs_office and realize there are no players anymore, and they will not return ever again. The sense of watching an old VHS tape of you having a conversation with your mom in the hospital as she’s counting her last days because of cancer. The sense of comfort of coming back to your hometown. You remember your childhood and your high school crush, only to realize that those moments won’t happen ever again. -
My consuming cycle:
1. An urge to buy a new shiny thing. No peace of mind if I refuse to buy it. My brain starts to generate sentences like "Treat yourself", "Why are you even living if you can't buy what you want", etc.
2. Acquisition. Immense guilt about the money spent. My brain somehow classifies any non-electronic thing that costs more than $30 as "ridiculously expensive", no matter how much money I make, no matter my reserves.
3. A short period of... no, not peace of mind. It's just an absence of that urge. I can't quite call it "peace".
4. goto 1
Hyperconsumerism is hell. I don't want my life to be ridden by guilt. I want to break that cycle, but when I try, it's just me asking that blaming questions to myself.
Somehow I probably got an answer. I should make my everyday thought process and patterns independent of buying stuff. Money shouldn't define what I do and what I think about.
Everything I need with an exception of medicines is both factually cheap and perceived as cheap, and I don't feel guilty about buying medicines.
What should I aim my thought process to? I'm tired of programming, because it provokes an entirely different kind of guilt, the guilt of "you shouldn't be resting, go write that article, go study that new web shit, go build that another open source thing (that nobody cares about)".
Art makes me a bit happier though. I studied 20th century progressive art a bit, and appreciating the ideas behind certain pieces of design, architecture and fine arts make me feel superior than other people, and also superior than my past self. I don't know if it's healthy or not, I'm just being honest now.
I think I need more art in my life. For now, I'm fine with knowing that I'll probably never create a real piece of art (aside from programming), so at least I can consume art instead of buying worthless shit that doesn't make me happy anyway.5 -
When i saw how by applying logic and "writing some lines of code" i could create something no short of an art piece, at least for me. Prior to that moment i've never found something i Both enjoyed and were good at (that i could make a career of, that is), so from that moment on, i just knew that mine was the path of the coder :-)
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What i have observed is that these days shearling leather jackets are trending in women winter fashion. For me its a life saver, it keeps me warm which is important and it is trendy which is way more important. LOL
i've recently purchased a sheepskin leather jacket from a website mauvetree. com , it is just piece of art, believe me!. after that my husband also ordered his shearling as well. they have a great collection of jackets. do have a look! here is my jacket <3 <3question aviator jacket style usa shearling jacket leather jacket mauvetree fashion sheepskin jacket1 -
"You can have an art experience in front of a Rembrandt… or in front of a piece of graphic design." - Stefan Sagmeister