My girlfriend is amazing:

After a long uphill battle trying to finish a huge open source project I started months ago. She noticed I was getting a little deflated.
So she donated a small amount to the donation page to lift my spirits.
She wanted to do it secretly but didn't know that it wasnt anonymous.

The little things spur us on.

Yes ! It's working !
Wait.. hang on..
This is too simple..
I definitely must've done some blunder that's staring me in the face..
Spends countless hours trying to find it.. breaking it a couple of times in the process..
Okay.. It's cool. It's correct. No blunders.

Nothing like trying to get an O(nlogn) efficiency on sock pairing.

Well, I was the One that was scolded. Because I basically took over without asking permission to fix a critical outage.
I fixed it within 3 minute, while the person in question have been trying for 2 hours.

He then got very angry and told me infront of everyone that "dont ever help me out".

Said and done. I never helped him ever since, even if he clearly struggled with everything.
He got fired recently due to incompetense

I need to render point clouds in OpenGL for a project I'm working on. The problem is it just becomes too damn slow when the point cloud size increases. So I'm trying to use LOD methods and nested octrees to speed things up. Also, I need to render text too in my OpenGL scene. So now I'm stuck trying to show proper labels using Qt and OpenGL which is completely pissing me off by the way. And I'm not doing the actual speeding up thing I was working on earlier on and before that I was working on the actual function of my program. So I'm now deviated from the deviation.

Fuck my brain.

me: "ah, my scraper is nearly done - just need some final tweaks"

coworker: "JuSt FrOm LoOkInG aT yOuR ScReEn A fEw TiMeS tOdAy, I cAn TeLl YoU iT wOnT wOrK"

me, infuriated by his idiot mentality but not trying to start anything: "ah, its fine, I've already scraped 3000+ entities"

coworker: "but it wont work."

me: "but... its working..."

coworker: "but it won't work."

me: "ok."

sometimes its just better to just affirm the narcessistic assholes. make sure they are right.

Demoing a new feature in the Dev environment.

Me: The images are just placeholders. The communications team are still coming up with appropriate images.

Management: Can we change that image? It doesn't really fit the theme of what we are trying to achieve.

Me: As mentioned earlier, all images are just placeholders. Continues demo.

Management: That image also doesn't really fit with the theme. Can we change that one too?

Me: 🙄

....

I give up trying to write this.
I'm just too fucking pissed off.

My interactions with my micromanager make absolutely no sense -- she is clearly just trying to piss me off and blame me for everything, facts and reasoning be damned.

I tried detailing this week's examples (there are lots, and it's fucking Tuesday), but. screw it.

Fuck working for (and with) her.
She's a bitchface and a thundercunt.

I'm updating my resume and fucking off out of here.

God fucking damnit i hate her.

Don't tell anybody but I basically spent 8 hours today trying to write one email.

colleague in a planning meeting: so now it's Easter, which in Germany is public holidays on friday and monday
PM: i as a manager would find it great if there weren't any public holidays

yeah not surprised, but thank fuck you're not the one to decide that... some people are trying to have a life^^

Darn it, I was having such a good day. Just sitting over here in sysadmin land watching the Java devs tear their hair out over the Log4j vulnerability, when someone just had to ask me about the Jenkins servers my team maintains.

Jenkins doesn't use Log4j! What a relief!

Jenkins does, however, have third-party plugins, some of which use Log4j. And thus my relief was short-lived and now I'm also tearing out my hair trying to patch this shit.

Boss: I'm going to push you into the water without a lifejacket, and you have to learn how to swim by yourself.

*Not sure he is trying to be funny or he is out of his mind.

Recruiter: "Take this culture survey. It's not a test. There are no right or wrong answers."

Me, internal voice: Then why give me a list of words to choose from that I think describe me best and another list of words to choose from that describe how I ought to behave at work? Clearly, there's a matchup you're trying to do here. So clearly there's going to be a wrong answer if I don't choose enough of the former to match the latter.

Ok so I'm trying to focus on reading docs on a game engine to do some game dev

And wife busy disturbing
wife: come do this for me
wife: come sit with me
wife: come talk to me
wife: come massage me
wife: come do this to me

Its like a stream of endless error messages

Network admins deleted the VM my team's git server ran in.

I'm trying to focus my fury into a work appropriate message to their boss.

"fire everyone" is my first response, what would you do?

Continuing someone's project mid way be like doctor performing operation, leaving it mid way and other doctor trying to continue. May the god bless the patient.

I hate how disruptive meetings are, I was coding and now I don’t know what the fuck I was trying to do.

“Stop trying to name it and name it”

Kevlin Henney adapting Morpheus’ iconic “stop trying to hit me and hit me” with regard to choosing names for classes/functions/vars. Too often we pussyfoot around with computer sciency sounding words instead of just calling it exactly what it is.

Stakeholder: In user profiles, I want users to be able to renew gift memberships for their giftee.

Me: ???

SH: For example, if I buy a gift membership for you and it expires or is about to expire, then I want to be able to renew it for you.

Me: Typically, gifts aren’t the gifter’s responsibility to manage. There’s no reason for you to be able to manage my membership from your account, even if just to renew. You’re opening up Pandora’s box here. If you let users renew for giftees, you’ll eventually have a user ask if they can cancel the giftee’s membership because they got into a fight and want to stick it to the giftee.

SH: But our users aren’t using the gift membership sales flow correctly. That results in all sorts of data issues for our reporting services and we spend so much time fixing it by hand.

Me: Your sales flow is confusing. The website asks users to verify membership for a giftee in case the giftee has or had a membership. How it the gifter supposed to know that? You’re trying to make things easier for you, but you’re expecting the user to know that and comply. That’s unrealistic.

SH: But there must be a something you can do.

Me: No.

Wasting about an hour trying to leave detailed comments and suggestions for a fellow student on an university project's code.

Said person just respond on the team group with "If anyone does not like something, he/she can go ahead to change it, so we would move on faster"

THEN WHY THE FUCK ARE WE STILL DOING CODE REVIEWS???

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning

(developer thing)
I am trying to build code from the last 4 or 4:30 hours at office and she message me

She : it's urgent.. call me

Me : me();

(THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID 🙄)

Trying my luck...

Y(n_n)Y

Trying to buy a house in another state. First time moving out of state, first time trying to buy a house. Making first offer this weekend. Which is terrifying, and exciting. But it’s also lonely because my other half is in the other state looking at houses and I’m stuck here working and taking care of the cats.

Had a poor mental health day yesterday. Got a call today that my mama (gran on my mum’s side) took a tumble and has been in hospital and they don’t think she’ll pull through. I don’t have many memories of her, but the memories I do have are happy ones. She was always full of life and love and kindness.

💔

After days of trying I finally got Vulkan to render something and I regret it I absolutely regret it

Sometimes I wish I was driven by positive reasons, and not by self-loathing and sense of worthlessness. I didn't have an actual vacation for over 3 years.
I am now in Thailand with my parents, and I am working my ass off to meet IROS/RAL deadline instead of chilling. The urge to continue working is really compulsive. I am very tired.
On a brighter note, the early experiments I ran look promising

At a large enterprise-sized company, you are protecting the code and product from outside / bad actors constantly trying to break in. (🧠)

At a medium or small-sized company, you are protecting the code and product from clueless customers or users who can potentially break things for themselves. (🧠🧠)

At a sTaRtUp, you are protecting the code and product from being destroyed by the incompetent owners themselves. (🧠🧠🧠+)

Trigger Warning - Don't date JavaScript developers.

They Promise to Callback but they won't. You'll Await in vain. They don't know how to Express themselves and React to such situations.
You might not be happy to hear this, but I'm trying to save you from a Garbage situation

I spent the last three weeks+ (literally THREE full weeks, weekends too) building something I thought was really cool, powerful, and useful. Made a blog post, posted a giant thread on the company Twitter.

Literally one person gave it a like.

I don't know why I give shit anymore, cuz nowadays if it isn't about getting rich quick, cHaTgPt, or some other made up hype, no one cares. Apparently I shouldn't either...

Meanwhile my 16 GIGABYTE RAM MAC, yes 16 GIGABYTE RAM can't even hold power while plugged in, and I'm still clowning around with an ancient iPhone 6 (actually one of my mom's old iphones) that barely stays above 20% battery for more than an hour...

And FINALLY, my FUCKING ISP is for sure screwing me, since I've been doing some hard core data streaming and broadcasting, even though I pay $60+ month for that shit it, keeps dropping out, shit doesn't load.... I mean wtf this isn't 1990 dialup AOL anymore

When I step back I just feel like the worlds biggest loser, maybe the world's biggest 🤡

Nothing quiet like the feeling of choking an interview. 😞

Related note. Trying to program with 8 people staring "over your shoulder" (even virtually) is. the. worst.

Trying to get my 'patience for Idiots' threshold back up to 15 minures. Not easy.
The problem is - you need to listen to them talking for 20 minutes before 30 seconds of relevant and actual info comes up.

> asks for better pay
> starts trying to evaluate the quality of our efforts
> complains about doing things that are not good in the long run
> spends time mastering best practices
> unemployed

Being a programmer is basically like seeing all the cool tech that you always wanted to work with slip right out of your fucking hands and being replaced by an old system that bad programmers have managed to fuck up completely beyond saving. It’s like watching a bunch of monkeys trying to create a human out of decaying flesh, but when you question them, they look at you weird. It’s like wanting to create all these crazy cool animations and innovative experiences, but you end up spending most of your time trying to get a fucking image to line up correctly in marketing emails. My pride has been stripped from me.

Facebook is a giant piece of shit. Not only is their platform a massive contributor to mental illness, even their API's are fucking garbage. I'm trying to use their ads API and what it does is it hijacks the entire fucking request so you can't even extract data from the request after calling it. Fuck Facebook and everything they've ever "contributed" to society.

My imperative dumb ass me trying to code in ocaml:
👁👄👁

Trying to write my intro for my page on uni's website.
It's making me frustrated cuz I'm starting to think of all the things I haven't done but I should've. 🙄 Compared to the rest, I've been very slow. 🐢

☹️🐢 is me now.

I spent three hours trying to find out why the server wasn't working properly and the issue was that the plugged in mouse was faulty (╯ಠロಠ）╯︵ ┻━┻

I am currently under a desperate crunch at work, trying to get things wrapped up before my honeymoon.

Of course, this is when My Greatest User decides he will come to my office no fewer than five times today. Not once was it for an actual, legitimate issue that he had not created himself. Here were the top three for today:

#3
MGU: "The scroll wheel on my mouse isn't working. I used to be able to scroll stuff with it but now I can't."
ME: *Looks at his mouse. All looks well.*
ME: "Show me what you're trying to do."
MGU: "I'm trying to scroll this Word document. See? It won't scroll!"
ME: ..."That's because there is nothing to scroll... The entire document is on your screen..."

#2
MGU: "I can't move my mouse off the edge of my screen! I used to be able to move it from my monitor to my laptop screen and I can't do it anymore!"
ME: "Did you move your laptop?"
MGU: "Yeah I moved it to the other side of the monitor. That shouldn't make a difference, should it?"

#1
MGU: "You know the DOS commands?"
ME: *Does a triple take.* ... ... "Huh?"
MGU: "The DOS commands. You know how you can use DOS commands to make the computer do stuff. Like Ctrl+M."
ME: "Ah. You're talking about keyboard shortcuts."
MGU (ignoring me): *Goes on a long, confusing explanation of something he's trying to do in Outlook and wants to know a keyboard shortcut for instead of clicking.*
ME: "I don't know what the shortcut for that would be and honestly I don't have time to look right now. I really need to keep working on this project."
MGU: "You don't know?"
ME: "Nope."
MGU: "Oh... I'd have thought that with being a programmer you'd have gotten into the DOS commands."

I have never been so tempted to quit.

Bad dev habit I'm trying to fix?

Code addiction.

NO, YOU ABSOLUTE DISGUSTING GREMLIN OF A JS HTTP CLIENT, I DON'T WANT YOU TO "JsOn.StRiNgiFy" MY PAYLOAD OR DOING ANY WEIRD SHIT

I NEED TO SEND THIS THING EXACTLY AS IT'S WRITTEN, STOP TRYING TO GUESS WHAT I'M TRYING TO DO I'M A DEV WITH SOME 7 YEARS OF EXPERIENCE WRITING CODE, I'M SENDING A STRING CUZ I NEED TO SEND A STRING

Trying to communicate with a client's former "web guy" to transfer the clients domain back to my client so I can make changes to the design and make it mobile friendly.
He emails me "it's on Wordpress, so it's already responsive"

Go to double check on iPad and my phone. design is unresponsive...

I'm trying to code here and can't do find/replace in SQL Server mgmt studio because fucking "antimalware" malware uses most of my CPU. I'm sure Microsoft is mining crypto

It's official, the "front end dev" doesn't know how to code.
Why.
And it's not a "Well I don't know JS because I use React." scenario, no. He has almost no idea of coding.
What was he thinking trying to build the front end of a very complex app with just HTML, CSS and stupid copied and pasted snippets?

I’m already irritated by all the unwanted stimulus. I don’t need search engines, websites or whatever that fuck showing me stuff I did not ask for. It’s really distracting and makes it hard to focus on one thing. I’m trying to adjust to a lifestyle like this but it’s bloody difficult in this day and age.

WTF is going on with marketers in LinkedIn?! I’m an engineer why the fuck are you trying to make me sell your product to a company I only code for, fucking spammy cunts contact sales and do your job I have enough with mine.

When you spend 20 min trying to find out why your function wasn't working in your angular2 app and find you put an extra t in your function name than what you were trying to call...

Working with Microsoft is like trying to make a fucking bridge out of jello. It’s like trying to tell where you are in a forest by licking the soil. It’s like trying to run on a track covered in oil. It’s like trying to speak to aliens. Its like trying to write something with your own blood. It’s like spending 10 fucking hours to find out how to setup the IDE so the scrolling works. It’s like shoving your tv remote up your own ass to feel something.

I kinda feel like people trying to call Facebook "Meta" is just as awkward as people trying to use correct pronouns when a person announces that now their pronouns changed.

A person, however, deserves to be understood.

Meanwhile, Meta is just Facebook. A new name won't solve that shit pile of ethical problems and sketchy business practices that just keeps growing.

! Dev

YouTube constantly shows me ads for marriage and dating apps for muslims.

... I just want to know the logic behind that. Neither am I a Muslim nor am I into marriage. If anything, I'm considered an abomination in Islam. (I know enough about main religions, ThankYouVeryMuch) You see, my conspiracy theory is that YouTube is trying to make me racist (or rather, religionist?) by showing me irrelevant ads on a constant basis to make me angry.

I'm onto you YouTube!!! 👀

I am sitting on a fucking vibrator!!

PoV: Writing my code, minding my own business, listening to lofigirl.. private Schema<?> asSc
<rrrrrrrRrRRrRRRRRRRRHHHHHHRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRHHHHHRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRHHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRRRRRRRRGGGGGRRRGGRGRGGRGRRRRRRRRrrrrrr.><KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK><3.5sec pause><rrRRRRRRRHHHRHRHRHRRRRRRRHRRHHRHHRRRRrrrrr>
hema(Type ty
<hhRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRrrRRRrRRRRRRRrRRRRhhRHHrHRHHRRRrrrrr>
pe) {

How the hell am I supposed to concentrate when my neighbours are trying to make me cum with a drill.

Swear the God, my ass is on some serious vibro.

Actually let people in? IDK, as someone who's trying to finish her last academic step, I am mostly killing time instead of doing something useful.

My supervisors was shocked that I am an atheist and says “we accept all kinds of people”, then proceeds on trying to convince me that Christianity is the way (in life and work)

Note: I have no problem with people having religion and I respect them, but damn don’t force me into it.

Habit I'm trying to fix?
Doing it all myself. I've been timeboxing my problems and forcing myself to ask instead of forcing myself to just figure it out myself. Communication isn't my strong point.

Bad dev habit I am trying to fix: copy-pasting code without understanding

The client: "I'm trying to export as HTML a few data we collected in 1 month with your software, why does it take so much???"

The length of the generated HTML file for the "few data":

Half my Instagram likes are just me scrolling down and randomly stopping so it accidentally counts as a like.

Good luck trying to find what I've liked tho! Instagram protects that shit more than the nuclear codes.

Who the fuck developed this shit?

Scrum master asks how I'm doing and how I'm finding the project I'm working with.

I complain about the lack of documentation and that it kills me (well, kills my brain with increased migraines) due to my Asperger's as I need CLEAR instructions and not ~something~ I need to piece together from asking from 5-10 different people who all know some minor part of the final answer.

"*You* could do the documentation, lankku, while you're figuring it out!"

Just...FML.

And the reason I was trying to find out this one thing related to a completely different repo I have never worked on was because I was trying to write documentation for something totally different that just needs a login redirect from this different repo. <.<

15 min till technical interview with IBM:
Trying to convince myself I’m not an imposter. 🙃

10 min after the interview:
I’m thinking how for the last 15 min of the interview they were pitching about how great the life at IBM is and why I should join.

We recently had an error in legacy systems about a user trying to find photographers in Virginia but somehow it shows photographers in Mexico. Apparently it's because both Mexico and Virginia have the same zip code XD guess whatever it uses to search stuff didn't think the company would be used past the US.

Me: I've not done this before, so any guess would be pure assumption.

Client: Okay, but still, you would have some idea, right?

Me: It might get done in 3 days or may take even 30.

After 3 days:

Client: But you said that it will be done in 3 days. Now you are saying there MVP is not ready. Do you even know, your part is the most critical one in the project. We believed in you. We trusted you. This is insane. It was a wrong decision to choose you.

Me (in my head): Didn't I say, this is the first time I am trying to scrape Coles? It might take time?

Me (in actual): I understand, it is getting delayed. Am trying to get this up ASAP....

Anyone else experienced toxic clients but still didn't lose their cool?

My LORD!!!!!
Trying to work on code and wife busy interrupting

The real rant is trying to figure out when the devducks will ever be back in stock.

Programming consists of 10% rigorous science, 20% ingenuity and inspiration, and 70% trying to combine the former with the latter. 👩‍🏫

There should be a basic qualification for getting certified as a trainer or a teacher.

This one dude is trying to give us knowledge about advanced C++ and I shit you not, he thinks the best way to engage with the audience is just read monotonously off a PowerPoint and saying "am I right?" in 5 minute intervals.

Can't wait for this day to get over and then finally I am free ffs

It happens some times. not actualy their fault.

Today i reached office on almost lunch time. and i saw our new intern(3 members) team trying something on same PC, something in like css file. (Helping each eachother).

Yes i Forgot to mention that they were supposed to finish that page-task yesterday (in angular app).

When i asked them about issue.On which i got to know that they were trying to apply css on class name. But could not since Morning.And when i saw code, It was something like this....

Yes "cls_model" is css class

yet another Microsoft bashing rant...

I'm trying to get `Visual Studio`
You use your Windows 10 VM, use Edge, use Bing and search for `Visual Studio`.
First fucking result:
A Visual Studio alternative - A powerful C & C++ IDE - CLion
-- from jetbrains.com

Like... WTF, you not even promoting your' own stuff ?

But then for when you search 'firefox' w/ bing+edge a thick fat banner: 'Promoted by Microsoft': There's no need to download a new web browser.\n MS recommends Edge for fast ...

Wasted all morning trying to work on my defense. Brain is not responding. Then sat for some data exploration cuz I got tired of wasting time and brain is like "woah! I love this! Let's do this!". 😐

My defense is gonna be a shitshow. FML. ☠️

This is not joke but fact

More than a year ago I write code without tests, I must confess its frustrating trying to debug without proper testing. testing is painful I must admit but you can't compare the confident you have on your code with the pains when writing tests.

About a year ago I wrote a whole software without tests and this words from a friend hunted me everyday till date he said, what cannot be tested cannot be trusted. Wise words.

I'm doing a tiny project in c++ to teach myself, its infuriating. Forgot the pass-by-reference ampersand and spent a full hour trying to figure out why the program took so long...

i was trying to check a purchase i made on the store's website, so i tried to login, but I can't?? like, i fill the form and press login, and it doesn't? log in??? what the actual fuck, how are you supposed to do anything like that. isn't the login page the first thing they make? how doesn't it work? how is this website still active??

How did you spend your weekend?

- 1 day wasted on trying to configure a project

- 1 day spent on formatting documentation ( including changelogs & mailing archives, project started in 1987? The repo still has files that were last updated 26 years ago )

I’m trying to explain the theory behind ‘Rubber Duck Debugging’ and to be honest, they don’t believe me 😂 they say I’m drunk. Help me out here, who else uses a rubber duck or something similar to help debug code?

😒 I just found a new method of how to stay awake throughout the night without sleeping.... No coffee required

.. By 10pm
Start a project and name dictionary.py
On visual studio make sure you are not using internet because this is an exam and cheating ain't allowed..

Now start coding until it fully functioning and can generate random words out of predictions...

😩 Feel free to hate me after trying that

i don't have the energy to argue against this bullshit any longer

when you're trying so hard to build a piece of crap that nobody needs, fine.

After 10 fucking wasted hours Im still up trying to figure out how to configure the motherfucking IDE to debug the fucking hideous PHP shit fuck code. Fuck PHP right in the ass.

This item on my TODO list reads "Finish the paper" but it's more like wishful thinking. I have very few pages available (cuz IEEE still can't afford to give you free pages all the while being fully electronic and each extra page costs like €1000000) and much more to explain. As well, am trying to fit words by removing other words...

Fuuuuuuuck youuuuu toooooo IEEE.

TFW looking at the regex for the password validation is easier than trying to decipher wtf they want

I always feel like a fool when I accidentally rubber duck someone - at least when I do it on purpose I've warned them first! What often happens though is I ask a question I think I need the answer to and then make the connection while they're trying to help me

I swear to god this industry needs some serious purging. I was trying to google the parameter to Node that crashes on unhandled promise rejections so that I can get a stack trace and debug it properly, and literally all relevant SO questions were asking how to _prevent node from crashing on unhandled promise rejections_. In what realm is that preferred behavior?

Trying to get ChatGPT to say inappropriate things is like talking to a fucking twitter user, having to reassure everybody every other sentence that no hypothetical people are being offended and that everything is fine

So, update on the ransomware attack on the health ministry in Brazil: wasn't a ransomware.
They just rerouted the DNS.

Apparently they've been trying to issue a vaccination passport, and the federal government has been pissy about it. And now everyone appears as unvaccinated. What a fuckin coincidence huh

Programmer writer's block (or trying to name a variable):

If I had to name one attribute that dominates the software engineering ecosystem, it would be “arrogance” especially among young programmers. I think software engineering would be a much better place to work if people were more empathetic than being ginormous assholes trying to have a leg up over all their peers. Collaboration is much more rewarding than competition. It feeds your soul and feels a lot more natural.

Collaboration over Competition.

Have a peaceful day at work guys!

Me: *changes a long and complex calculation to fix old mistakes*

Program: *keeps outputting the same wrong result*

Me: *goes mad for a good hour trying to discover the problem by debugging it like a angry rat*

Also me after one hour of debugging: *discovers he never changed the output source of the function and it's still outputting the old result*

past time: Making jokes on programmer humor forums about the jokes being told on the humor forum.

fall out: Autists who don't get the joke of the joke and genuinely think they need to explain the original joke even though it is "obvious" it was a play on words.

struggle: Resisting explaining to them the joke on the joke. And if I break down and explain, trying not to be a condescending prick. Most of the time I don't respond.

Corporate work recipe:

60% meetings
20% trying to remember what typo they made in your email address this time so you can log in in yet another poorly designed tool
20% "work"

Companies that make things devs have to work with: please stop trying to implement your own version of markdown. I don't want to memorize 3 different ways of making links

HJSON is as much not trying to be YAML as C# totally wasn't a Java clone.

Been trying out WebStorm for my html and js instead of my coding in my usual vim setup today. I think I may have converted. Only time will tell.

one of my friend is new to frontend dev.

and he's trying to center a div (text).

using position absolute and relative.

It's not working BTW.

We're communicating over text.
Must be loosing his mind.
He'll finally understand center div memes.

Alan Turing at more-or-less my age: Cracks Enigma code

Me at my age: Trying to remember the name of the boat from Titanic

"You're always on the computer".
No, but I am continually trying to spend *some* time on personal projects before being interrupted 10 minutes in, to be forcibly given a list of jobs that are on *your* agenda. There is a difference.

Waiting for my demo video to finish compiling and trying not to think of awful reviews I'm gonna get on my paper next year. 😐 #AnxietyIsConsistentlyFun

Devrant, are you trying to indicate me something?

Client breaks website and i’m the one trying to fix things. For two unplanned hours i’ve been trying to help and instead of a thank you i get a thanks for nothing message. I’m not responding to this client next time. Fuckn bitch

I think it makes more sense to divert IT budget to building a time machine.

It would be cheaper than trying to fix all these problems, and just as effective.

Today I spent half an hour trying to figure out why my IDE stops on an exception that is very obviously caught.
I left a breakpoint there because the stack traces behaved weirdly.

Looking for platform specific language options for a new project at work and reading articles from well known sources.

If you start your article with something like, "when I think of a good programming language, I think of JavaScript", I'm going to punch out of your shitty opinion faster than an async function.

When you're trying to convey an unbiased message you generally don't start with, "I'm an absolute shill for {language}".

What the fuck happened to journalistic integrity?

I'm trying to install my SSH Server and nothing works. I think i've seen every SSH Stackoverflow site and i'm still too dumb :C

Trying to learn CSS for the first time is equally fun and painful

I’m trying to learn piano, but keep zero indexing my thumb. When I see I’m supposed to use my 5th finger, for a moment I wonder what species they think I am.

"There was an error creating the rant."

Well, that's helpful when I'm trying to post a rant !

Notion: Working with variable arguments in C is weird.

Hypothesis: It might be weird because I am used to it with more....err...dynamic languages.

Solution: hit the docs and stop bitching about shit

Situation that put me in here: Trying to do a game engine is hard....

After all the rants I've written on this topic, no, no, fuck no. I ain't answering jackshit. The trauma is very real. I'm trying to not have a panic attack just remembering few of the times I've lost work, personal data, side projects, accounts, you name it.
Oh dear God it's hard to breathe...

Been trying #rust for 3 weeks now and I really like it. No hopes for a job, but it's nice to have different point of view when coding in Go.

Part rant, part a question. Im working with a colleague on an android app. The guy uses a library for everything that he cant solve on the first try. Need rounded corners? Get a random library from github. Settle a dispute. Am i wrong for trying to avoid using libraries unless i have to or is he?

I was trying to book a visit to my doctor at the largest private clinic of the country... I wonder what would a normal user understand from this message? 🤣

we're doing a massive database migration and trying to fix a lot of shit that was done for years in the db. problem is, i have to cater to a business major asshat that doesn't know the first thing about working with data and he's responsible for 99% of the shit we're trying to clean up.

his response to the problem i brought up in his stuff? "we can deal with it later, right now i need it like this". this is why you guys have a shit database, because we have to spoil this idiot. then they complain everything takes forever to run and the database is bloated and somehow it is our fault.

I'm really holding myself right now, because i already went off on him once and he basically called me hysterical, and our boss likes him too much to antagonize the bastard. but god i wish i could run over him

By trying to do my best. Doing a good job makes me feel good and gives me even more motivation.

Also by trying something new every time. Either by using new library, new approach do to things or whatever. Just to keep stuff exciting.

Today, I randomly remembered a guy who was doing an internship at my college's tech lab. From what I gathered (I wasn't really part of that group) all they had to do was familiarize themselves with one of the many systems available and... I suppose maintain it or improve it.
.... Poor guy spent the first 2 to 3 weeks just trying to get Ruby on Rails to work. The work he was doing was not (and would never be) critical so there was not much of a sense of urgency.
Someone should have told him to use a fresh VM. Guy was trying to get it to work in his private laptop running windows. A doomed endeavor.

Code on own side project the whole night without sleeping til 6-7am right before going to work because today is half day only in office.

I thought I could manage it but haha totally wrong, First 2 hours were good, during last 2 hours I was trying my best not to fell asleep.

Worst decision ever.

Not a rejection per se, but a company I applied to just stopped emailing me after trying to arrange a day for me to come to the office and meet the team, following an informal phone interview. They dragged their heels while I was on leave and by the time they got back to me I was back at work and had limited time. They basically just ghosted me after that.

Why are you trying to multithreaded c++ file i/o? If you can't write c++ code that's faster than your hard drive, please just don't write c++.

Literally no complex calculations, just some insane string formatting.

I just remembered I have a list of funny things I want to put in a tech movie. Just thought of new one today:

Programmer trying to do IT work and cannot locate the person they are trying to help:
I have a specialized set up skills. I will find you, and I will fix your printer.

The character would be a programmer and have a PHD. Printer Help Desk certificate.

After months of trying to help someone by working late with them, teaching them all I could, showing them why a bug came up, i eventually got annoyed at the stupidity and asked them to "engage their brain". It doesn't seem big but I imagine how they must have felt.

Hear me out. Ive been trying to fix this flutter bug for... I lost the count of how many days or weeks it was, maybe even months. I now got to the point of having borderline mental breakdown. I am crying because i cant solve this bug and there is no one to help me. I am on my own. All by myself. And im crying.

I hate servers that only support EFI boot with a passion. Yes, legacy / BIOS boot is old, but it was so simple. I've been spending hours trying to get EFI boot working on servers with swraid-ed disks and *nothing* works without ugly hackish patches all over!

Anyone successfully got an EFI partition (/boot/efi) on an MDRaid device? D':

Worst: forced to work for 9 months on a shitty wp theme:
- colleague with no clue trying to make me do their work… check
- incompetent manager doing shit about it… check
- idiotic pipeline requiring to redeploy for every asset update… check
- micromanaging cto which for some fucking reason didn’t want to allow access to the writers, forcing the role of content editor on the devs… ducking check! Quack!!

Best: automated lots of processes in my free time, all stuff which I can reuse!

Does anyone here have any good resources for introduction to embedded, low level development, or anything on advanced C concepts? I've been having trouble trying to step into more complicated topics like bit manipulation and stuff I can do with memory management. Also any advice is also appreciated.

After all the pain I just went through trying to get this workflow to pass config data, I'm gonna relax by writing overly fancy config file documentation.

LET THERE BE BOX CHARACTERS!
┏┓
┗┛

It's a Monday, I've been trying to fix a bug since the morning, I cannot read or write any code. I tried to review a PR, still cannot read the code. Getting frustrated by the slightest problem.

Windows PC's are literally just consoles

Windows is trying to integrate WSL so badly but until it's seamless Windows just won't be a dev environment

OSX4LYF

I'm trying to reach Alice but none of my messages get through. Maybe Eve has something to do with it 🤔

- Linux (OS)
- VSCodium (General Coding)
- Godot (Game Dev)
- Krita (Digital art and edits)
- Blender (3D Art)
- LibreOffice (Docs)
- LMMS (Music/Audio)

I'm trying to find OpenSource alternatives to anything creative I do.

I was trying to click buttons on a screenshot... ;p LoL

Going to long trying to figure it out myself before asking for help.

When a senior asks me, the guy who started 4 months ago about documentation on something that they’ve been using for several years. Haha, yeah bro, wouldn’t all of our job be a lot easier? I’ve been going down entire rabbit hole networks trying to find credentials and API tokens for the last month because there was no documentation 🤷🏻‍♂️

My last night :
- Had nothing much to work on
- Opened an anime site to spend sometime.
- Clicked on some really good shows.
- Realized full screen isn't working on that page.
- Fired up JS Console , spent next 30 minutes trying to get the video part full screen. Failed!!
- Opened up Google & navigated through stackoverflow looking for the fix. Still couldn't do it.
- Cursed the website for having a bad design.
- Left the site.

Me after my Mac decided to run two unkillable mystery httpd processes on port 80 when I’m just trying to meet deadlines using MAMP for local dev but it no longer works.

That's a good one!

Sadly, in real life, I'm overly polite (working on fixing that dammit!!) and always trying to stay professional. I have a couple of coworkers who not only need a scolding, they need someone to beat their idiocy out of their little brains.

I have on occasions told some coworkers off when they were way out of place. A recent one: idiot PO trying to micromanage the dev team and thinking he's manager of the devs, came to me personally (sudden Slack call, no calendar invite) with some bullshit feedback about ̶c̶o̶m̶m̶u̶n̶i̶c̶a̶t̶i̶o̶n̶ CUMmNnicaTioN (I had to). Told him it's not his place to give me feedback and it's not his place to manage my time for me and ended the call aggressively which I don't prefer (it's always better to keep your cool and control your thoughts and words). My cholesterol level went up writing this.

Thank you and have a nice Monday!

Me at 9:00 AM: wide awake 🔥
Me at 10:00 AM: after spending 1 hour on trying to find out why storage space is low on some of our production servers: ready to fall asleep any second 😴

Cheese and crackers this is the worst code I’ve ever seen... i hated visual basic before but when it’s written by incompetent devs it’s 1000 times worse. Brb going to go tear my eyes out before trying to debug this shit code.

Yesterday whole day ive been trying to deploy an ios app to app store from a flutter project but kept getting "module not found" in build compilation error

I thought to myself am i fucking dumb?

Or maybe i am smart but extremely UNLUCKY in life like always?

Today i googled for this error and one of the top stack overflow answers with a +50 bounty points, first sentence they answered was "this is a very bad and UNLUCKY error, after trying to solve this issue for hours i finally found the solution..."

......

...........

Google Photos <-> Google Drive <-> Google Keep <-> Google Calendar interoperability is _very_ limited as I already knew, but it seems to be even worse for "non-technical" people trying to actually use it

I saw a post on linkedIn from some recruiter trying to find jobs for "those great people who worked at twitter and got laid off" from twitter

Then I saw how twitter got hacked again because they were storing password in clear. Maybe they sucked at their jobs lol

My mother teaches in a language school, and one of the students was diagnosed. Later, two other students from other groups were also diagnosed. Right now the teachers are trying to put a consensual quarantine in place, but they aren't very keen on that.

I'm trying to get an internship.
My coding skills are great, but I get really nervous/scared when interviewed. Social skills are trash...

How many years experience as a dev do you need to feel like the cool hacker guy in the movies instead of a blind monkey trying to play the violin for the first time?

Dear discord are you trying to indicate me something?

Trying to actually use tailwindcss makes me start hating it already. Instead of just adding a CSS style that I know without looking up, I have to look up the documentation to find a tailwind class name that contains the styles that I want to use. I still think it is great for beginners, but otherwise we have to learn two languages (CSS and TailwindCSS) instead of one now?

i was trying to explain to someone that we have really specific problems that others don't really understand, which i think is why devrant exists. it was kinda frustrating, cause idk if i explained it very well.

what would you guys say is the worst part of working as a dev that others wouldn't get?

It is day 4 since I started trying to export my Flutter app for iOS. I am finally at TestFlight point.
This....
has been.....
....exhausting.

In a company meeting today. This guy is droning on, trying to fit as many business bullshit words in as possible.
I’m wondering how many people actually were listening or even remotely interested.

Trying to mock Azure storage was like a toxic relationship it gives a little bit of progress and hope to keep you around and goes back to the beginning and gets nowhere! Nope not doing it!

And I owe it to these words:

A great warrior knows when to quit!

Making my sleep period do a backflip by having 25-26hr days. It shortens the quarantine and feels more healthy than trying to cram all the work, sleep and procrastinating into 24 hours.

What the shitbiscuit is happening with trying to build a single window, 200 line node project? Who thought it is a good idea to use ShitScript to write desktop applications?

Fuck me...
Literally spent all day trying to figure why I'm getting a 500.30 error on my application. The damn fucker won't let me get THROUGH. I know it's possible to do because I did it with another application, but this one is being a little shit.

I feel like the very definition of insane right now because I've been doing little incremental changes but getting the same results.

I just want to rip the entire thing apart.

I keep forgetting about Ctrl+space so I always end up trying all the letters on my keyboard to see a complete list of properties on a config DTO.

Do you think AWS will still be THE thing within 5 years? Trying to learn REST/cloud/database stuff as a junior dev, but I'm having trouble with the pile of shit documentation.

Suppose you made a tool for your STL that throws compile-time errors when trying to copy references, so your pointers remain tidy.
Suppose also that the language has a a turing-complete preprocessor that can be used to throw useful errors.
Then WHY THE FUCK DOES UNIQUE_PTR NOT OVERRIDE THE DEFAULT ERRORS WHICH TELL ME NOTHING ABOUT WHAT I FUCKED UP BUT PRETEND UNIQUE_PTR IS AT FAULT FOR NOT DEFINING "OPERATOR=" ?

I’m goin nuts here. I’m trying to build a website and everytime i think i’m finished the designer adds a little change or an extra page. Meanwhile projectmanager is asking if we can finish asap. Fuuuuuckofffff

How do you find open source projects you want to contribute to? I'm trying to find projects I'm interested in but don't really know what to do.

What is a waste of time when you are trying to develop your career as a software engineer?

Continuing to learn k8s ecosystem and to achieve acceptable level
With trying eventually Helm, Argo CD and even trying to use not managed setup for k8s.

Going though books to find out theory about being SRE.
And about data intensive apps.

Learning and trying Kafka

Learning and trying FastAPI and diving in generally to async python ecosystem

Learning Go.

Learning few more books to increase code quality and its compositioning.

Getting more practice in monitoring and logging systems with applicating them to k8s.

Got bored and decided to try and compile X11 Quake (WinQuake) so far trying to troubleshoot some undefined references

This is a test rant. 2 keys stopped working without warning, so I'm trying 2 get used 2 using the new, remapped layout.
I mapped W to rightmost of the top row and 2 to the 2nd rightmost, both of which were previously diacritic versions of existing letters.

In Microsoft Teams, once you paste a text with a link you can't remove it anymore. I'm trying it in all the ways

I hate installing things with pip. It has to be the worst set up for a package installer. About 75% of the time something I'm installing fails and I have to look up why. Coming from npm and yarn where it just works I can't stand the disconnect I get when trying to get into something and I have to configure stuff for the first 3 hours before I can actually do anything.

I was thinking by now if they weren't trying to justify raping everyone's bank account wouldn't all the fucking motels be paid off ? They were only built in the 1970s

If they're trying to imprison garbage put them in prison but speaking for the people who were not selling their own ass or anyone else's this artificial inflation and scarcity has been fucking things up forever

The Hilton should cost 74 bucks maybe 100 depending on which one
A fucking econolodge like 50 and it should be fucking clean
The way they slave drive people who work for hotels and resorts they're not paying much to clean a fucking room and do some laundry and the idea is to encourage people to stay

Not encourage enabled child molesters to take up residence like t Hampton down the road

What to do when you want to strangle a coworker, but he is probably just trying to do his job, the way he thinks , is the right way to do it ?

Company I applied to for a senior position gave me a take home assignment and after reviewing said I'm maybe not to the senior engineer level but close and they'd like to consider me for normal engineer role. I personally don't think too much of it and can understand, but want to ask if there's any suspicion of trying to get a cheaper deal or if this is quite common actually.

react is garbage because javascript is garbage

like trying to draw straight lines but there's no straight edges to work with

fuck hooks , im too salty and stupid to learn this shit

You’re writing CSS with an elegance of a dog trying to use a pair of scissors.

Spent 4 fucking weeks trying to implement this motherfucking feature and in the end after 15 failed implementations it turns out that my first implementation was good. Turns out this other devs fucking feature had a bug (he forgot to add two lines to clear current state and to update current state again). Motherfucker.

Took me over 100 hours to debug that piece of shiet spaghetti codebase and I had to go through grief stages few times to the point where I started questioning my own damn ability

Sometimes it sucks not being able to go step by steap and think in a linear way. I guess if I followed the breadcrumbs I would have solved it sooner. But poking around things and trying out random solutions was like going through a maze blindfolded until I got it right but I guess thats how my brain works.

Dirty data? More like dirty laundry! And don't even get me started on explaining complex models to non-techies. It's like trying to teach a cat to do calculus. Furr-get about it!

Something that really confuses me are the people who signed up to the compsci uni course without ever trying programming before, like no way it’s a good idea to invest thousands of dollars and three years into something you have no idea if you’ll even like

I've been trying to write a shell command automation in rust but stuck :(

Jesus Fucking Christ can you just guess what the code is doing instead of me feeding it to you like a fucking baby. TRY TO HAVE SOME SORT OF INTUITION DAMNIT I’M TRYING TO HELP YOU SO YOU DON’T LOOK LIKE A DUMBASS.

dependabot keeps trying to destroy my working code

After trying a several browsers, I’m switching back to chrome. Hats off to google. Yay

Jr a little low while trying to do some stuff. Took down the prod sql server for a while. Some disturbance but not the end of the world but she’s a little low.

I am like: GREAT WORK!!! NOW YOU ARE LEARNING!!! 💪

Time for cake and celebrations!

Today i fucked up trying to generate stats from sales and forgetting to check if sale state was completed or cleared.

Causing sales and revenue on the report l to be inflated by sales that’s failed 3DS checks, bails, bank rejects and other failure states.

Go on have a cheap laugh at my silly incompetence 😂

Well...

Attempt #2 of trying to pass Introduction to Databases using SQL

here

we

go...

I wasted all of yesterday trying to create a business object in staging which can't be created with the admin panel instead of modifying an existing one to fit the case I was testing, because i forgot that this is staging and just assumed that existing objects are not to be touched.

Flu Brainfog sucks.

Trying to debug the clients nonsense webpage, it loads over 50 proprietary JavaScript files.
*maximum facepalm*

Building a development department from the ground up is exhausting AF i mean all the research, trying to find best industrial standards to us, best practices, main tech stack to use, working on projects and trying not to get fired

Sitting here
Trying to rhyme
but this one is a crime
One thing is clear
I could've done better
in german

Rhyming in English is hard ^^'

Finally, I just received an OTP message that said it will be expired in 10 minutes.

Funny part is that i was trying to login 2 hours ago at thier(new client) platform to review.

And they said it is fully functional and you will have to fix some minor issues only.

I am thinking this way( it is so secure that you received otp only after it is expired).😅

Web designers should seriously stop using this ultra-slim Monsterrat font.

If you need a modern/futuristic-looking font for your web site, consider using Futura or Noto Sans / Open Sans, or Proxima Nova. If you really, really want Monsterrat, don't make it so slim that it becomes barely readable for the sake of trying to look wannabe-"modern". You are just humiliating yourself.

Nothing better than debugging 7000+ lines of css code when the theme had Grunt setup by default. (Old theme needs update because of client reasons)

Luckily the dev did a good job of adding comments. So I got that going on for me.

Trying to stay more positive this week.

Spent all day trying to fix a Windows 10 machine.

I fixed lots of things I didn't know needed fixing..

But I don't know yet if I've fixed the things I started off needing to fix !

Along the way I discovered all manner of things..

i am terrible at using swagger autogenerated code, yaml and swagger files

dont fucking false positive pass, tell me if theres indenting wrong

also why the fuck wont you generate the code im trying to get you to generate

i fucking hate you so much, ive done this once before what am i doing wrong now

Another day, another possibly stupid idea for my language. Another one of those that's been floating in my head from the start, and I want to have it, but I'm not entirely sure about its implications...?

I mean... languages already have semantic feature like this, I'm just trying to extend the principle to not have any special cases, to be completely universal and have simple syntax.

Thoughts?

Just upgraded to macOS High Sierra (10.13.1), and holy cow it is buggy as hell.

Some of my findings include:
1. unresponsive "cancel" button on certain dialog boxes.
2. erratic behaviour of the "show password" checkbox.

guess how is trying to downgrade until the requisite patches arrive?

Why the fuck isnt pythons tabbed loop thing something that's configurable?

So many things to like about python, but is there someone on this planet who actually likes this feature?

Trying to use it in Jupyter notebook (browser) is a nightmare, because tab will focus on next ui element.

Or am i missing something?

Is there anything worse than Peoplesoft? I'm trying to sign up for a new job and everything is slow, timing out, or poorly designed. I've been at this for 4 hours now and I'm not even halfway done!!

When I had a burnout failing to complete a uni task.

I was trying to implement a parallel version of the Barnes-Hut algorithm for the N-body problem. Spent way too many hours on that.

Blue whales sing at 188db. Jet engine is 140, and human pain threshold is 120. Imagine trying to swim to the blue whale just to be defeated by its _song_.

Just ended a 4 hour debugging session trying to work out dlv debugger for golang, only to know that "dlv doesn't work on wsl".

Movies depiction of us was so wrong :'(