Manager: Hey what was that that you closed on your screen just now?

Dev: That popup? That’s NVIDIA letting me know that a new driver for my GPU is available.

Manager: Isn’t that for video games?

Dev: I mean that’s the reason many people opt into having a GPU but It’s not the on—

Manager: You are NOT allowed to play video games on your work computer!

Dev: This is my personal computer. It’s just an older GPU I popped onto this computer since otherwise it was just sitting in a drawer. My work computer is out of commission.

Manager: Well where is your work computer? How come you are not using it?

Dev: …Because of that blue screen of death issue we talked about yesterday.

Manager: Ok but that doesn’t give you permission to play VIDEO GAMES on your *WORK* computer.

Dev: …

I fucking want to skin alive my engineering senior director and VP.

Fucking piece of shit people. Looking at their faces from behind the screen, I can sense them stink doneky balls.

They have made my life hell.

The entire tech architecture is absolute shit in nature and engineers cannot even build a single blue colour button without creating a major fuss about it.

Every single aspect of product is built kept in my only the engineer persona. Everyone else can go and suck a racoon's dick.

And they have no concept of tech debt. They just keep building and building stuff. And then build some more.

Entire engineering org is in rush to ship shit at the end of sprint and if they don't then VP and Director are pissed. So to keep those two half witted donkeys happy, these people ship garbage. And all they comment is "cool, very cool".

And hence, entire fucking product is built because it's cool irrespective of whether it solves a problem or not.

A single user role authorisation or authentication is so fucking complex that it would take an eternity for even a developer to figure what's happening.

Fucking toxic human wastes.

There's a company wide mandate to use a certain tech stack, design guidelines, and a vision that all teams have to align. But these faggots are going in opposite direction to do what they feel like and forcing everyone else to ignore all other engagements or alignments with other teams.

These two people should be skinned alive in town square during noon and then left there until they dehydrate entirely. Fucking baboons.

I am so fucking pissed with such mindset.

My dev colleagues, the ceo, a external designer and me (dev) are sitting in the meeting room
and we discuss the result from the designer. He designed a complete relaunch of a
small CRM for the logistics sector.

The designer is a designer as you know him, big beart, small macbook, chai late
and he designed nothing, he hired a freelancer from romania.

My boss studied software development in the 80s but didn't really developed a software
for about 20 years, but he thinks he knows all and everything.

My boss is constantly complaining about the colors in the design and he would like
a iOS approach. Our system should complete copy the styles from iOS.

The really funny thing happend in just 1 minute. My boss is complaining again about the
colors and told the blue color is way to dark and the designer meant thats not possible the
blue color very bright. My boss sat next to the designer and looked not on the wall where
the picture was thrown from a projector, instead he looks from the side in the macbook screen
of the macbook which was in front of the designer. Then the designer says "Oh my god, the color
changes if I look from the side or from the top of the macbook." The Designer was blown away. My
boss couldn't believe it and did the same movements with his head and said. "Wow, you are right
the color changes".

We all other people couldn't believe that they are so dumb and thought this must be a joke. But
that wasn't a joke. After the meetin my boss told everyone in our company his results regarding the screen.

I wrote every story in a document, and I'm planning to create a book with dumb shit like this.

Why does MS need to be such a scumbag with Windows updates?
Every now and then, this unskipable blue setup screen appears and forces the user to make some decisions.

"Do you want to set Edge as the default browser?"

"Do you want a 360 subscription?"

The usual crap.

But it‘s not skippable!

You have to make a decision and the UI for "fuck off" is different for every decision.

You can‘t just press the Nope button every time.
It‘s fucking deliberate. They want you to spend time on reading their shit and force it down your throat.

And let‘s not forget about people who don‘t know computer stuff very well and are confused by this. Then call us because "the computer isn‘t working again."
And you can‘t tell them to skip this slimy rotten vomit of a marketing weasel because you need them to tell you what the options are for each fucking decision screen.

😫

I'm forced by my job to use this fucking unusable piece of horse shit also know as a Windows operating system.

And it's not only that I have experienced every fucking corner case bug that is possible to occur in our universe.

Not only that that for last 2 years I seen more blue screen than blue sky.

Not only that forced updates fucked my schedules so many times that now I'm really *afraid* to turn off my computer off because I have zero guarantee that I will be able to restart it in a reasonable amount of time.

No, neither of those broke me.

The thing that kills me everyday is, piece by piece ...

WHY THE FUCK THERE IS NO SINGLE, USEABLE, SANE TERMINAL EMULATOR ON WINDOWS

I JUST WANT TO TYPE SOME COMMANDS, COPY/PASTE TEXT AND SCROLL

IS IT TO MUCH ?????

FUCK CMD
FUCK POWERSHELL
FUCK WSL
FUCK ALL THOSE WANKY THIRD-PARTY EMULATORS
FUCK EVERY-COMMAND-LINE-REALATED THING ON WINDOWS

FUCKING USLESS SHIT
CANT EVEN DO SOME SSH COPY/PASTE SHIT
WITHOUT SOME WEIRD CHARACTERS POPING OUT EVERYWHERE.

AND FUCK THAT EVERY ONE OF THOSE MUST HAVE TOTTALY DIFFERENT SET OF KEY SHORTCUTS

AND THAT FUCKING BELL
WHY WOULD YOU EVEN PUT A FUCKING BELL SOUND AS DEFAULT SETTING ??

GO TO HELL MICROSOFT

I WANT MY LINUX BACK

So earlier my Windows 10 machine decided to crash to blue screen on me. First time I have seen a blue screen in 4 years. I thought, this sucks. I waited for it to reboot. I logged back in and saw it was busy doing "stuff". Then I heard the hardware attaching noise.

This is what I think happened. I think because I did an update the other day that it had installed new drivers. I think there may be some sort of driver A/B testing going on. So the blue screen gave Windows enough info to know which driver. Then when the machine restarted it either reverted to a known "good" driver or switched to an alternate.

I don't know if this is true, but it is a cool feature if it is. Do other OSes do stuff like that?

3 years ago when I was a university student...

I have a classroom presentation with my friend a group of 4.
When I start presenting for about 5 minutes, my friend who control the PowerPoint Slide told everyone in the group the PC was about to restart.

Suddenly before we try to move a mouse to the update postpone button, it restart right away in front of the class and our eyes.

That day a whole class need to wait around half a hour to continue the presentation session.

What a wasted time, Windows.

Windows is not full of surprises. One can expect the (light) blue screen.

(Picture in comments because it stretches like yo mama pussy in the post)

Stakeholder: Users are unable to buy tickets on the website. IT says Azure’s health check is showing an unhealthy status.

[It’s Sunday. Web Engineering is not on call so no one sees this right away.]

Stakeholder: IT restarted the Azure website twice, but users still can’t place orders.

Me: There was never an issue with the Azure site. That health check is inaccurate. There is a rewrite rule that sends the Azure supplied domain to our custom domain. The Azure health check doesn’t like that so it returns an unhealthy status. The problem is the ticketing server that the website has to communicate with. The ticketing server is overwhelmed and can’t handle more requests. IT should have checked the ticketing server’s logs. This has happened before and it’s never been an Azure issue. It’s a ticketing server issue.

Stakeholder and IT: Oops 😅

—-

JFC. Stop trying to make this web engineering’s problem. Stop trying to make it look like engineering dropped the ball. The ticketing server has experienced this issue multiple times. The ticketing server is maintained by a different team. The website’s symptoms are always the same and there are steps you need to take before you make the decision to restart the website, which will cause the website to show a blue screen of death that says 503 service unavailable for a few minutes. And we have a switch to shut off all transactions. Why do you not want to use it when it’s clear the website can’t process transactions???

The blue screen of death

Dev Health Rant!

Hey guys, so I've been supper busy working most of the time and doing passion projects, very recently I've noticed eyestrain at the end of the day. Lights seem too bright and far away stuff seems a bit blurry, this doesn't happen on weekends when I don't look at any screen.

I feel like shit because of it, I can't go to the hospital since they are COVID crammed, I'm thinking about asking for a 2 week PTO to see if it subsides and buy some blue light filter glasses.

What do you think? Anyone in a similar situation?

This is a PSA in case anybody thinks of installing BitTorrent. I used it for thirty seconds and cancelled the download. Things were noticeably slufggish afterward. I ran Malwarebytes and it identified 22 viruses, all associated with BitTorrent. Before quarantining the viruses I uninstalled BT. When I quarantined the viruses I got the blue screen of death. I was able to reinstall Windows. NEVER DOWNLOAD BITTORRENT.