Eclipse is a piece of shit.

modern relationships

friend of mine: "I like my servers like I like my girls"
me: "insecure?"

clients union

Backend Dev here and this is a true story

There's nothing like playing Cards Against Downtime with colleagues while lunchtime :D

errors well done!

OMFG! I just fell over laughing 😁🤯

Seniors: Welcome to the team. Feel free to ask anything if you need help. There is no such thing as stupid questions.

New Dev: Sure. Thanks.

*a few minutes later*

New Dev: How to comment a code?

Seniors: Google it....and please don't ask stupid questions.

Did you know that
console.table(arr);
will let you print whole JavaScript arrays in table form in console?

Our prayers have been answered

Boss decided to limit Wi-Fi access only to company computers.
Ended up blocking everyone, including himself.

Serverless computing

Landing your first developer job be like...

Been looking around ways to improve devrant's user experience a little, Idk whether you guys like it or not.. Just a suggestion 😂

JavaScript guys!! 🤣😅😅

One giant leap for mankind :D

It's really unstressing me when walking with my doggo 😌. I also enjoy the walk in the morning with him very much 😁

when testers add issues to the issue tracker and the body is just "it doesn't work"

Okay thanks for the bugreport

Public announcement: if you build shitty software and get called out for it, either fix it and stand up for it, or fuck off. Nobody needs your idiotic passive aggressive tone.

Thank you

All your cookies are belong to me

I swear this mofo runs all of my code through pylint, he comments about every PEP8 inconsistency and every formatting decision he doesn't like.

Same guy also got in a small debate with one of our converts from the older project where they used C#, because he still writes everything in Windows-style CamelCase. After that, when we needed to decide on a password for a shared thing, I came up with "camel_case".

- Let's use jquery to fix this
- No
- But it will work just fine
- I'd rather re-write the code and not use jquery in an angular project
- ...
- NO!

Brain: hey kiddo, want to stay home and work on your side project today? I'm feeling good.
Me: fuck yeah finally!

*call in sick.
*open laptop. Tabs and editors already waiting.
*play music, no sound.
*system is all laggy.
*fuck, restart.
*
*Installing windows updates...

*leaves for work.

Quality code you say...

when your function finally works, but output is different than expected

Reading minified Javascript feels like entering The Matrix.

It has been bugging the shit out of me lately... the sheer number of shit-tier "programmers" that have been climbing out of the woodwork the last few years.

I'm not trying to come across as elitist or "holier than thou", but it's getting ridiculous and annoying. Even on here, you have people who "only do frontend development" or some other lame ass shit-stain of an excuse.

When I first started learning programming (PHP was my first language), it wasn't because I wanted to be a programmer. I used to be a member (my account is still there, in fact) of "HackThisSite", back when I was about 12 years old. After hanging out long enough, I got the hint that the best hackers are, in essence, programmers.

Want to learn how to do SQL injection? Learn SQL - write a program that uses an SQL database, and ask yourself how you would exploit your own software.

Want to reverse engineer the network protocol of some proprietary software? Learn TCP/IP - write a TCP/IP packet filter.

Back then, a programmer and a hacker were very much one in the same. Nowadays, some kid can download Python, write a "hello, world" program and they're halfway to freelancing or whatever.

It's rare to find a programmer - a REAL programmer, one who knows how the systems he develops for better than the back of his hand.

These days, I find people want the instant gratification that these simpler languages provide. You don't need to understand how virtual memory works, hell many people don't even really understand C/C++ pointers - and that's BASIC SHIT right there.

Put another way, would you want to take your car to a brake mechanic that doesn't understand how brakes work? I sure as hell wouldn't.

Watching these "programmers" out there who don't have a fucking clue how the code they write does what it does, is like watching a grown man walk around with a kid's toolbox full or plastic toys calling himself a mechanic. (I like cars, ok?!)

*sigh*

Python, AngularJS, Bootstrap, etc. They're all tools and they have their merits. But god fucking dammit, they're not the ONLY damn tools that matter. Stop making excuses *not* to learn something, Mr."IOnlyDoFrontEnd".

Coding ain't Lego's, fuckers.

*food comes in at work today*
Fellow engineer: yum yum yum!
Me: apt apt apt!
All engineers: 😑

😅