Another dev on my team just got a new machine. Before he came in today I made two separate USB installers and left him these notes.

I realized hacking was about being smart when at 14 i hacked into someones computer by guessing his password on the 2nd try.

The dude loved computers more than me and watched matrix all the time.

So i typed “neo”

girl friend: What kind of stripper would you want for a Bachelorette party?!?

me: no stripper...

girl friend: like a coding stripper?

me: what?

girl friend: he'd come out and be like, one zero one one zero one...

me: I love that you think I code in binary hahaha

girl friend: like the matrix!

me:
*pauses*
*contemplates explaining what binary is*
yes, like the matrix

:D

Warning : This rant contains bunch of ransomware stories. If you are tired of ransomware, do not read this rant.
---------------------------
07:00 AM
Woke up from my bed with a rubber ducky in my right. Just had a nightmare. My homeroom teacher was yelling at me saying "you will be heavily.." Then i woke up.
08:25 AM
Came out of home, walking to school. (5 min walk). Was happy because there was 38 devRant notifs.
08:32 AM
As I entered the school entrance, I saw a strange thing in the school monitor. It is a monitor that tells the event of the day, and stuffs like that. Instead, there was 2 workers beside that monitor and Anonymous with the green matrix background was displaying, and saying. YOUR FILES WAS ENCRYPTED!! and to pay 0.08 bitcoins to the address below. I said wow... by my self.
08:33 AM - Classroom
Announcement said main server in the school was encrypted by an unknown ransomware. I thought wow. Then one thing slipped my mind. "Wait... I saw that ransomware before... Where did I saw it..." Then i sat in my seat for a couple of minutes freezed. My friends came to me and siad if i am okay. I became pale.
I made that ransomware few months ago...... (to see how it was infected, see below but finish reading the story first...)
Then I rushed to my homeroom teacher office and received my cell phone again. (the school collects cellphones in the morning and gives them back in the afternoon) I quickly connected my phone to my class tv, turned on bluetooth, and brought out my bluetooth keyboard. Then I tried accessing the main server of the school.
Friends kept saying why was i doing these stuffs. I kept saying to shut up.
I had the decryption key stored in my raspberry pi in my house encrypted with two factor authentication and a 20 char long password.
I found the page i made to pay the bitcoin. Then i managed to get access to my raspberry pi by my mom's help. Then i safely copied the file, wrote in a paper, then typed in.

Few minutes later, server was backed up.

Yes, it sounds fake, but it was real... I was scared to death.

-----------------------------
So how did this happen, well...
In March, we visited the computer room. I accidently sticked the usb that had the ransomware samples to it. Then I accidently copied thr ransomware file to the network. And I guess someone in the school opened it today. Phew...

Thanks for reading!

I wonder how much extra luggage it needs to carry css and js.

Software Engineering Matrix

1024 points of soldering !!

Wasn't expecting that when I began, but it's quite interesting and the result will look amazing ^^
I'm making a LED matrix from 0, controlled by an Arduino, it will look really good when it's finished, I plan to use it to display notifications, clock, sound spectrum etc...
What do you think of it ? 😇

I love the Hollywood Technical Jargon Generator:

"The SDRAM transmitter is down, compress the auxiliary address so we can synthesize the GB matrix!"

1. Do you know why my computer is so slow?
2. What cellphone do you recommend me to buy? (They always end up buying the cheapest)
3. What do you do at work? (Answer: "I create applications". Anything more complex than that is not going to be understood or they will loose interest)
4. Something is wrong with the: [TV, Cellphone, microwave, etc.]. Could you please take a look? (Believe or not, if something works with electricoty, my family thinks I can fix it).
5. Is it true that if I send this WhatsApp message to all my contacts I will have more options?
6. I need to build an application that (pretty much The Matrix), how much time do you need and how much would cost? Don't you dare to give me wrong numbers. (We have to see the future)
7. (Continuing the previous point, a non-technical client) I don't think that would take so much time/money. (Every time)
8. I want to use the latest Front-End frameworks. I want to see all those beautiful animations in my page and that it runs smoothly... I also need that it runs in IE 5.
9. So, you have been working in the back end? If you don't have a screen to show to the client is like you didn't do anything in this sprint.
10. Why haven't you built and million dollar application? Everybody is doing that right now....

Yep, those are only a few downsides of our profession if we count family, friends and even co-workers. But I can't imagine myself doing anything else.

What I'm posting here is my 'manifesto'/the things I stand for. You may like it, you may hate it, you may comment but this is what I stand for.

What are the basic principles of life? one of them is sharing, so why stop at software/computers?
I think we should share our software, make it better together and don't put restrictions onto it. Everyone should be able to contribute their part and we should make it better together. Of course, we have to make money but I think that there is a very good way in making money through OSS.

Next to that, since the Snowden releases from 2013, it has come clear that the NSA (and other intelligence agencies) will try everything to get into anyone's messages, devices, systems and so on. That's simply NOT okay.
Our devices should be OUR devices. No agency should be allowed to warrantless bypass our systems/messages security/encryptions for the sake of whatever 'national security' bullshit. Even a former NSA semi-director traveled to the UK to oppose mass surveillance/mass govt. hacking because he, himself, said that it doesn't work.

We should be able to communicate freely without spying. Without the feeling that we are being watched. Too badly, the intelligence agencies of today do not want us to do this and this is why mass surveillance/gag orders (companies having to reveal their users' information without being allowed to alert their users about this) are in place but I think that this is absolutely wrong. When we use end to end encrypted communications, we simply defend ourselves against this non-ethical form of spying.
I'm a heavy Signal (and since a few days also Riot.IM (matrix protocol) (Riot.IM with end to end crypto enabled)), Tutanota (encrypted email) and Linux user because I believe that only those measures (open source, reliable crypto) will protect against all the mass spying we face today.
The applications/services I strongly oppose are stuff like WhatsApp (yes, encryted messages but the metadata is readily available and it's closed source), skype, gmail, outlook and so on and on and on.

I think that we should OWN our OWN data, communications, browsing stuffs, operating systems, softwares and so on.

This was my rant.

Went to see Jason Bourne last night. No spoilers, but I'm guessing this is how the writers came up with the story:

Writer 1: Let's make it super techie
W2: Yeah, that way it's about current issues, like Internet privacy.
W1: Should we hire a tech consultant so we get things right?
W2: Nah, I saw the Matrix once, I understand computers.

Actual line from film:
"Use SQL to corrupt their database"
😑

We had a priority 1 incident (= the complete basis of our business is at risk, nobody can work anymore). The reason: at least 50 fax machines didn't work anymore ...

You're laughing? Well, in the department next to us, they still use dot matrix printers.

The Matrix, minus the oppressive AI overlord, so I can jack into it and learn all the frameworks necessary to build said dream project.

I wish I could download developer knowledge into my brain like Neo did in "The Matrix".

"I know React"

My favorite method?

Step 1: Meet Morpheus
Step 2: Swallow red pill
Step 3: Wake up from the Matrix
Step 4: Upload needed Knowledge directly to my brain
Step 5: Go back to Matrix

I think I just figured out the function the matrix used for my gf's dog.

Public Action GetOrder(string humantalk)
{
If (Order.parse(humantalk)
.VoiceLevel > Int.MaxValue)
{
while (true)
{
this.bark();
}
}

return dogsAction.Parse('eat hand');
}

Parents finally interested in what I do so they watch me do it

Mom: are you messing with me, what's with all the words? Where's the 1's and 0's, I thought you said it was just like the matrix

Me:...
...
...
I said only in the same way that there's computers

50 years from now, this might be a conversation I have with my son and grandson"

Me: "I remember the time we had a dot matrix printer"

Son: "What's a dot matrix printer?"

Grandson: "What's a printer?"

Decided to write an inverse matrix function and my eyes hurt already

Was in a middle of competitive coding trying to do some operation on a nxn matrix. Wrote this code.

for(i = 0; i < n; i++){
for(j = 0; j < n; i++){
.......
.......
}
}

Was waiting for the output, only to wait long enough for the coding platform to throw a timeout at my face and make me doubt my skills.

My Father is an old bank accountant. So he knows that, behind their mainframe screens there are ugly code stuff and I deal with them.

When I try to talk about my job, Mother's eyes grow in awe. She thinks of me as a sci-fi character.

As my career goes very well, my wife thinks I'm so skillful that I must be like the architect guy at Matrix.

Mother-In-Law and Father-In-Law: A mix of my wife and mother.

They are all proud and happy, so am i.

.... And it appears my Atom has Entered the Matrix. Full time.

In other news, I successfully completed the E-Commerce App I was working on, even though that Stripe Verification was a ball ache and the bane of the entire project giving me a stupid bug in jQuery whereby it was infinite looping over adding the token and not actually submitting the card charge. Somehow changing my button from using an id to using a class fixed my problem :/ (# -> .)

Have a friend ask me helping him with a project for University.
Make an application in Java for Matrix and numerous applications.

Done, but I hid an easter egg. If you divide the matrix by 0 scalar output
FAP FAP FAP FAO FAP FAP.
He doesn't know.

This one isn't so much a rant but a short story about how small the world is.

Basically, I am a college student and I've fallen into the "Thinkpad Hipster" Group, more specifically the guy who runs Linux ( Arch, in this case ) learns some mostly irrelevant language, in this case Haskell, which while useful isn't really relevant in the modern world.

So this is where the story begins, I am sitting on the train to college and I am reading through a book on Haskell on my X240, so all is fine, when I notice some guy sitting in front of me who looks like an older version of me, I then notice that he's also using a Thinkpad, now I'm curious as to which, because I love the laptops, I see he has an X240 Aswell, oh, sweet, eventually he gets up to go to the toilet and looks over my shoulder at my laptop screen and sees that I'm learning haskell, when he comes back he begins to try and help me, which I was surprised at because so few people would know the language, when he showed me his laptop he was running almost the same setup as me, it was similar to a "Glitch in the Matrix" Moment, I truly didn't expect anyone to be running near the exact same stuff as me, look so similar and also be in the same area as me, that made my day knowing that some people also do the same stuff as me.

Yes! Just installed my old screen saver from about 15 years ago. It's the matrix one, it's updated to work with El Capitan.

Google told me I was speaking their language and asked if I wanted to play a game in a very Matrix-esque way. I'm now in the middle of coding challenges and when I finish one of them a ascii white rabbit hops across the in browser console. You have my attention Google, well played.

A tiny self-sustaining universe to look at. basically the matrix.

That moment when one comment on your Rant gains more likes than the Rant itself

ever noticed that a years day can be stored in an 8byte variable?

the creatorz of the universe anticipated computers!

WE LIVE IN A MATRIX!

Over the past couple of days I did nothing but focus on programming. Well, today I fell asleep while working, became semi-lucid and managed to access root directory of my brain and went into a folder called "dreams" and viewed my yesterday's dream.

That felt mental when I woke up. I wonder if it really was yesterday's dream or was it my dream thinking it's yesterday's dream? Can I reprogram myself? Damn. Does that mean I did a reverse Matrix?

Being a programmer in a scientific discipline can be infuriating.

using "no one" ="almost no one"
using everyone = "almost everyone"

1. No one knows what even the very idea of good practice is. And everyone refuses to learn. 3k lines of repetitive copy pasted main. 500 lines of plotting method.

2. Raw C-style pointer based array creation. Won't use develope array libraries because what if development stops. FUCKING HAVE YOU SEEN YOUR CODE WHAT IF DEVELOPMENT ON YOUR CODE STOPS. FUCK.

3. LOOP VARIABLES DECLARED AT THE BEGINNING OF THE METHOD WHY.

4. Everyone wants to make modular, independent code. No one wants to use OOP. NOPE. ALL IN ONE FILE. WRITE C++ LIKE A FUCKING PYTHON NOTEBOOK. FUCK.

5. LIBRARIES OH MY GOD PLEASE DO NOT CODE UP YOUR MATRIX MULTIPLICATION. PLEASE DO NOT TRIPLE LOOP IT. NO. THE LINEAR ALGEBRA LIBRARY WILL STAY IN DEVELOPMENT.

6. Please realize that literally not one comment over an 1800 line file does not help anyone.

FUCKING. WHY. WHY ARE WE SCIENTISTS SO GOOD AT SCIENCE AND SO FUCKING SHIT AT THE CODE THAT MAKES OUR SCIENCE HAPPEN. WHY. FUCKING. WHY. FUCK.

What would you recommend to a 17 year old developer?

Am still in highschool, started my programming journey around 2009. Got super interested in it when my father taught me how to create the matrix effect in cmd (lol).
Now I can consider myself having a pretty decent knowledge in c++, c# and couple other languages, although I still have A LOT to learn.
Since my current school doesn't offer any computer science classes, I don't get any opportunities to get an advice from experienced people, i.e. teachers.

Will appreciate any help or advice.

When The Matrix has you

There are always three questions i get asked when i tell people I'm a programmer:

Can you take a look at my phone/laptop/pc etc...?

Can you hack?

Whats the green stuff from matrix?

#WhiteRabbit

Sent a cv to a company because facebook threw their ad at my face and i said why not. They emailed me that they would call me today. I dont have a phone. Its not fucking 2007. Call me on matrix or telegram or even skype ffs.

Cousins came over...

Me: just compiling some python code, opens up jupyter notebook to take a look at some data science code
Little Sis: *looks at jupnb dump on cmd*
Whoa are you Hacking?
Me: yeah. I got bored of whole Hacking command typing thing so I opened up my hacker console.
*print("hello world")*
Sis:wow!
Me: you know what, typing is too tiresome, I'll connect to it with my mind
*alt-tab*
*cmatrix -b*
*sits in yoga pose*
Little Sis: Screams at the top of her lungs and runs to aunt
"DAVE IS HACKING MATRIX"

Got a mathematics library I develop and maintain. Someone filed a feature request ticket for matrices of matrices. As in, each value of the primary matrix is another matrix. Not understanding why anyone would need such a convoluted concept, I asked for clarification.

Response: "This piece of shit library isn't feature complete without it, now stop being a lazy fag in your mother's basement and actually do something"

Lololololol. Sure thing. Let me go waste two or more weeks of my life developing something i've never seen used in math, without any justification beyond "feature".

The moment you go to a random Windows computer and type:

color 0a
tree /

in cmd and say:
„I‘m hacking into the Matrix“

and everyone around you is just like
„ooooooooooooouuuuh“

Hmm..... Do I have time before work tomorrow to watch all 3 matrix movies?

Screw it who cares. Marathon time!!!

Got something to keep the screen occupied when I'm not using it 😎

When people say ai machines are gonna uprise and kill them! they are talking about matrix multiplications starting to kill people right?

Taking a 4 month Software Engineering course in University. Spent the last 2 months making Traceability Matrix, Component Diagrams, Deployment Diagrams, Sequence Diagram and not a single line of code was written.

Is this how it works in Industry as well? Lol.

What I say: I'm a computer science major.

What people hear: I can resolve any tech issue you have or will ever have on any machine that exists in this universe. I am jacked into the Matrix at all times. I am the IT god. Look upon me and despair.

What I mean: Sometimes I try to tell the computer to do something and I cry when it doesn't work.

Exit the matrix

!rant

Our implementation director got bored since yesterday. So, I decided to let him barge in with my colleague and let him manipulate the audio speakers. Things got funny and asked me to code properly so he can take a shot and send it to his friends. What I did, I copied and paste the code and saved as .bat to make the console looked like the matrix while coding. 😂😂

This is my generator matrix and you will not stop me 🔡

rant="""
It's too many features for me to keep up with. And the client just bounces between this matrix of all the possible permutations of them, refusing to admit that he is asking for mutually exclusive behavior in more than one place. I have mentioned to him at least 12 times a year that there is too much going on, not organized, we need to simplify, prioritize, or we will have 100 half baked untested features.

Of course it is more or less made it out to be that this is all my fault, or at least it's hard not to feel that way when I say:

It will be a long time before X will be working, we need 25 other things first.;

Next day he asks:
Have you made any progress on X;

I reply: Now we need 24 things to be done at this rate it will be a month.;

He replies:
Ok but I need this yesterday. How about if you add a new feature Y that does everything X does without those 24 things?;

I reply: That will not work at all like X. Y is just X + 1 more feature.

He replies: Ok well I need Y so when you're done with X I need a way to do it like Y also. I just thought it'd be easier.

EASIER TO ADD MORE FUCKING FEATURES YEAH SURE THATS EASY AS FUCK YOU FUCK FUCK FUCK. He's a nice enough guy, pretty smart compared to my first few paying gigs, but wtf really? How do I come out and tell you I need 25 days and you ADD more work? This was one example.

IN TWO days he has added 12 features. And during the week has asked for 29 UI interfaces to be COMPLETELY different. This is becoming COMMONPLACE. Every week there is either a huge change, or a conversation like about that finds its way into the entire business flow inside an dout.

The worst thing is: I TOTALLY understand what he needs. I feel that HE doesn't. This weekend I spent literally HALF of his retainer on getting equipment into my hands to bring it back to find out it DOESNT WORK. Why aisn't HE doing this so I can finish the features from NOVEMBER that HE NEEDS in order to PROCESS SALES.

I've tried and tried but I just can't get through to this client what a tremendous waste of time his \"process\" is, for lack of a better word. Constant changes, contsant additions, lack of clarity, needless repetition and contradictions, constantly adding moonshot ideas to compete with every industry in the region, and not beta testing anything until something goes wrong.

Fuck this guy! His business is failing and I felt responsible for the longest time but it is clear to me that if I wanted to save his business I would have to ignore 95% of his feature requests. I ignore 50% now because of the stress in trying to determine which of the 3 different paradigms he is talking about changing. I will lose this client, and I feel like he will sue me to get all of his money back. He holds me to very little honestly - BUT WEEKLY reminds me that he won't be able to pay me next month if feature XY and Z arent ready!

If a developer is CLEARLY overwhelmed, it makes NO sense at all to continue to PILE ON feature after feature
"""
try:
while true:
rant+=", after feature"
except DevHeadExplodes as inevitable:
raise YourDevsRatesOrLookElsewhere(inevitable)

Fullstack Bluetooth in the cloud using a mainframe matrix and heatsinks for optimal parallel multiprocessing.

I hate buzzwords. And especially hate TV shows that try to sound smart.

Watching The Matrix: Reloaded,
suddenly this happens

3 years after college u know that development is no where like the MATRIX !!! i hate u Neo 😡

Gotta make a decision matrix like the one in the picture. It's for a recommendation report concerning whether or not to distribute laptops to the CSCE students at my university and what kind of laptop if so.

I need help determining the weights for my matrix, because my personal preferences may not reflect the majority. As a programmer, how would you weigh the following three (very broad) categories?

Power(CPU, GPU, memory, HDD, I/O, etc..)
Quality (Durability, material, aesthetics, etc..)
Comfort(Weight, size, shape, keyboard, screen-eye comfort, OS familiarity, etc..)

Please write an integer 1-10 in the following format:
Power/Quality/Comfort ex: 7/4/9

Thanks, everyone!
-The Adderall'd-up devRant Noob, Benby

I used to think the "hackers" in movies were so cool, with the scrolling matrix like text. Now I just laugh because I know how stupid and unrealistic most of it is 😆.

Everytime you use OpenGL in a brand new project you have to go through the ceremonial blindfolded obstacle course that is getting the first damn triangle to show up. Is the shader code right? Did I forget to check an error on this buffer upload? Is my texture incomplete? Am I bad at matrix math? (Spoiler alert: usually yes) Did I not GL enable something? Is my context setup wrong? Did Nvidia release drivers that grep for my window title and refuse to display any geometry in it?

Oh. Needed to glViewport. OK.

You know what really bugs me? How movies show people hacking into something with the terminal and all the matrix code but its really not like that.

I've not had any good dev/CS teachers and learned all by myself.
So I guess I am the chosen one.

Slack or Matrix/Riot.im and why?

Hey guys, my gf and I want to do something with the Arduino we got. We are getting a CS degree, so programming is not a problem, but we have quite basic knowledge of electronics.

What could be a cool simple (but not too introductory) project we could do?

The arduino came with a bunch of sensors (ultrasonic distance sensor, humidity, ...) some input (joystick, RFID reader/writer, buttons) and some outputs (LCD display, 8x8 LED matrix, bunch of color and RGB leds).

The Matrix. Then use the brains of the people plugged in like a computer cluster for large calculations.

Why the fuck does python think that 50 <= 10 ????? This is so annoying!!!

Anyways.. I am working on a devrant client for the Arduino for matrix display..

Learning skills like in matrix ._.
Because you can never know enough

Probably my family thinks that I'm always Hakking the system with green on black Hekurmun terminals, and always connected to the Matrix.. Yes, they are a bunch of those dreaded muggles 😅

When leaving my computer logged in, for a few minutes, I always run "cmatrix" in fullscreen ... no one dares to touch it.

Client: *looking over my shoulder* "I don't know how you do this. It looks like you're programming The Matrix!"

Me: *opens new terminal window*
CodeMonkeyG $ ./cmatrix

Client:

What if twins are just glitches in the matrix :)

Follow the white rabbit.

"What is going on... this should work?!
Is my maths wrong?
My maths is wrong...
Oh no!
It's a model view projection matrix?!
I'm shit if I'm failing at this, it's 3D dev 101!
I got a first class degree... I don't deserve any of this or this job!!"

<2 seconds later>

uniforms.viewMatrix.set(camera.matrixWorldInverse.elements);
uniforms.viewMatrix.set(camera.projectionMatrix.elements);

"You set the same uniform twice you tool, due to copy and paste..."

Imposter syndrome in my early days put myself into a roller coaster of emotions. I always compared myself to others to the detriment of myself.
Thankfully overcame that working with some great guys.

But yeah, coding has impacted life for the best though. The challenge, creativity and constant learning is beautiful.

During my first semester of CS we were mostly using MatLab for basal scripting - assigning variables, learning about scope, that type of thing. I was excited to start learning programming but wanted to actually make something rather than reversing arrays and incrementing counters for weeks.

I discovered the image() function which takes a float[][] matrix and displays it as an image. I generated my arrays of random numbers and made a simple nested loop where I iterated over each element, averaging it with its neighbours, and - it worked on the first run! I made a freaking noise and blur filter!

That rush of planning it out, making it, and seeing it work I think is my main drive in coding. All the hours of undefined-but-they-are-tho import paths and mystery segfaults are worth it once there is that moment of "it lives!".

"We've got a new opportunity for you."
I'm a fucking rookie. I didn't know the meaning of this sentence. Suddenly, I become the "IP PBX expert" of the society.
"-Okay, it's some networking shit, I thing I'm good at networking shit. Piece of cake.
-Okay great, you have one month to learn how this thing works, because we WILL provide this kind of service."
Damn.
I spent one month learning this shit on my free time, printing RFCs and living in the fucking MATRIX to not fuck up on the very first day doing that, just in case something on the customers' network fucks with the PABX or something like that.
Oh yeah, I forgot: I'm paid 80% of the minimum wage because I am actually not qualified to do my job and I'm spending one week a month to learn how to IT (some french weirdness I think, if not, maybe it's the germans' fault. Also yes, 100% legal).
Today, they announced me that they "changed their mind".
I'm pissed.

This moment when you help your friend with data conversion code 😀.

By converting "super" mathlab script into real C# application so you don,t need to read the whole freking 1GB file into RAM and writing it into another 1GB matrix in order do save the result because mathlab is crap 😤.

Then that feeling when you want to create better mathlab from scrach in C# and you are actualy succeding 🤔.

Did i mention about grafical blocks for interface like in lego NXT2.0 😏

Is mathlab that crap or is programming that easy?

I've seen a lot of stuff mentioned here from little hobby projects to Matrix. This might seem unreachable because it's just too utopic, but I'd really love to at least see the world using one single platform for software that would "just work™".

Like, here you have - simple glue lang, SDK with billion _useful_ libraries that also just work™ and no need to change the code too much or select an alternative function for each different platform e.g. via macros and one last wish - it'll work on every machine that's capable of running any code.

Maybe one day...

And after this day... Matrix time 😀

Chuck norris uses 4-dimensional arrays. Chuck norris is a real badass

That feeling when you're coding around your less computer literate friends and someone makes a Matrix reference for the millionth time. #howfuckingoriginal

You take the red duck - you stay in Wonderland and I show you how deep the rabbiy-hole goes

The matrix

Giving a tensorflow workshop and the thing people struggle the most is the Linear Algebra behind it... it is only gradients in tensor and some matrix multiplication.

My recommendation is: do you want to work with Deep Learning algorithms? Y'all need Linear Algebra, not PhD, just a bit!

I just spent 2-3 hours writing a python script to make it easier to format solving system of equations through Gaussian elimination easier. It takes a matrix, then allows the user to perform row operations on it, and then it formats every operation done into LaTeX.

Alternatively, I could have spent that time actually working on the assignment it was meant to help me with, and probably finished 3/4 of it.

TLDR: Detect site visitors browser and conditionally load a Citrix frame rather than rendering the site

The request came about 3 days after launching a new project to production. For several months before that moment we had reviewed and confirmed the supported browser matrix. As you might guess plans tend to go up in smoke as we approach and pass launch. Now that we're live after all, it would be the tine to lose our damn minds rather than bask in the warmth of a successful launch for 5 minutes.

Anyway as for the actual request, after those first few days the client PM realized a FEW people were actually using IE8 and was now panicking that it was unsupported. On my way out of the building that day he asked if we could detect the browser and rather than render the site load a frame to a Citrix session that would be running the latest IE...

A funny quote and almost a true fact.

"Understanding closures, is like when Neo sees The Matrix for the first time".

YDKJS 'scope & closures'

Is it a Bug or a Feature?
Why am I seeing all the ++ scores in Binary?

(I Checked, those are up votes in Binary)

Devs are you drunk? Or is it April fools?

EDIT : steps to reproduce
1.open devrant app
2.click on any rant that appears in the feed

Love when i go to computer stores, i simply make a little bash code which displays numbers matrix-style and all the people just stare amazed.

Immortality in the sense like Matrix did it would be quite handy. Imagine you could become a program like Smith and be able to change your own source code, clone yourself with the same thoughts, knowledge and past.

Well, unless someone turns your machine off.

Are you fucking kidding me?

Just read about Intel ME (I'm trying to secure my computer). Why the holy fuck does Intel need something that powerful? FUCK YOU, CORPORATE BASTARDS IN SUITS THAT RESEMBLE MATRIX AGENTS.

Does anyone have any tips or updates on this? The article I read was from Jan 2016...

After reading the script for the architect scene in Matrix Reloaded I was determined to use the word 'concordantly' in a sentence. I am proud to say I have succeeded, and with reference to cloud computing no less.

Always test with the #Matrix.

Most interesting bug caused - created printer driver for vietnamese diacritical marks for old matrix printer without VN support by switching to graphics mode and plotting the dots and dashes. Print speed reduced about 200x and printer shook itself to pieces by rotating the cylinder back and forth. Oh well... Ended up buying two new laser printers instead.

Okay then, ex-android user there.

It started with Xperia TX - it was flagship Sony phone back then. It blew my mind when I touched it for the first time. You know, exploring android for the first time in my life was amazing.

It ran just well for about a year. Then it started to fall apart. I need to clarify that I kept it non-rooted, full stock. I'm not into that customization things.

At first, I noticed significant lags. They were everywhere. The longer I used smartphone, the more lags I encountered. I did factory reset, but lags haven't gone anywhere.

Year 2. Front camera stopped working. Battery became unreliable as fuck, going down to 40% and then instantly to zero. What?

Year 3. Camera broke. It refused to start, just giving me "Camera is not available" error.

I tried factory reset again. It helped at first, but month have passed and all that issues came back. And it also became sluggish as fuck.

Got Meizu m3s year ago. The exact same story. Long story short, in one year I got this:
1. Black spots on every picture I take. Much likely a matrix issue.
2. Camera also became slow as fuck, requiring about 10 seconds to even start.
3. Vertical stripes all along the screen. I never dropped my phone, it just appeared once and became brighter and brighter every day I used the phone.
4. Two huge yellow spots on screen. I think it happened because phone's cpu heat up the screen and it broke.

But the most important thing is that fucking lags chased me in every app, they were everywhere. Fucking tiny-ass lags. And they're not going anywhere, they're become more and more significant with time.

Don't say me about oneplus, samsungs and other top android phones. They are conceptually the same, the only different thing is hardware.

That's why I switched. IPhone has its downsides, but it's silky smooth. And my friend's iPhone 4 (not s) feels just as smooth as my brand new se.

I'm not going to jailbreak it. I don't need customizing the hell out of it.

I just needed quick and reliable phone, and SE seems to be exactly what I wanted.

Peace to android folks tho✌️

If the are rebooting The Matrix franchise, that means there is a chance Nokia will reboot the 7110.

Just thought the other day of something: AI devs are developing what will make their job useless, as AIs will be able to do programming. AIs will probably take over each and every job and we won’t have to work anymore.

They’ll eradicate diseases and we’ll live for quite a long time. When the basics needs will be completely fulfilled, their goal will be to make of the world a human paradise, with the goal in mind of making us happy and have no worries.

Then they’ll make it to the next level and plug us to a virtual world. It’ll be a paradise, an utopia and it will probably be like the 1st Matrix...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Or it may just not happen, but can we be sure of that… I’ve always laughed at people saying technology will end humanity, but now I realize that killing all of us is not the only way to end the humanity …

Try:
Read_Localizated_Content_(Ita)
😉

Ho trovato questo meme su fb... Rido follemente 😂😂

Except ItalianNotInstalledError:
I found this meme on fb...
M: I won't lie Neo, whoever fought an agent is dead. But where they lost you'll be victorious.

N: why?

M: I saw agents throw fists through concrete. Man shoot loads of bullet on them without hitting anything else than air.
Their strength and speed, however, remain result of the application of a system with many rules.
And you.
You are italian

(referring to our ability to avoid, bend, ignore and replace rules)

😂😂😂

Morpheus: Do you want to know what is the Dark Side, Neo?

Neo swallows and nods his head.

Morpheus: Unfortunately, no one can be told what the Dark Side is. You have to see it for yourself.

Neo: How?

In Neo's right hand, Morpheus drop a red pill in his left, a blue pill.

Morpheus: If you take the red pill, you will join the Dark Side. If you take the blue one, the story will end. After this, there is no going back.
Remember that all I am offering is the truth. Nothing more.

Neo opens his mouth and swallows the red pill.

So... are you brave enough like Neo, to join the Dark Side?

👨‍💻👩‍💻
OMG, programmer emojis just popped on my phone. (they are cliché though)

An API for an API..

Hear me out. :-)

You know how some websites have an API, and some folk write applications that use that API.

A thought occurred to me, instead of writing a new application for each website, why not keep the same application, but have an API for it.

Then each time you have a new website to support, you only need to develop the in-between module that translates one API to another API, you could call it the Translation Matrix Layer perhaps..

Thoughts, suggestions, ideas welcomed.

Epiphany!!
01. You realized you are in matrix
00. You get only Pokemon to follow not the white rabbit (just kidding)
10. You realized you are not Morpehus
11. You realized you are also not Agent
100. You realized you are no where near Trinity or Oracle
101. You realized you are not even the Architect
110. You think you are Neo!!
111. You ask the right question : Who Am I ? (Not which pills to choose)
1000. Who you are ??? :
You are some one who is walking pass the Blonde Woman in Red without even giving a look at her. (May be too busy in our own world to realize the world around can be as beautiful as the code we write)

Just had to type a 12x12 matrix by hand.. Bleh

I didn't choose the engineering lyfe, the engineering lyfe chose me

This rant goes way back.

> Be a student with student placement program at a big non IT related company back in the college days
> Given the job to work on a system to digitize their paperwork
> Had to go through 1.5 workdays of bureaucracy (?) to install Notepad++ and other basic open source tools to work with

IT'S JUST NOTEPAD++ NOT THE FKN MATRIX! JUST APPROVE THE DAMN THING!

finish this LED matrix x)

Are we the matrix for the people inside Tron 😵😵😵

You know you're a programmer when you take a walk through nature and begin to see everything in 0s and 1s.... Jus kidding, actually that's when you know you should stop watching The Matrix.

Coding alone:
int GetData()
{
int iErr;
int nPts;
int nTdx;
matrix mX;
vector vY;
vector vWT;
nPts = 10;
nTdx = 3;
Worksheet vks("Data1");
mX CopyFromWks( wks, 1,3,0,9);
.........

Coding when someone is watching:
"Where is the EFFING Semi-Colon?"

So at my school, the first 10 minutes of school is like when we can do whatever we want. Earlier in the morning i had been making a nodejs password manager thing just so i could try some things out. It also used bash so i could make it like a cli. I was debugging because my database viewer said that the table was empty but for whatever reason it still worked when i put things in it. So i had the db viewer open and terminal open and the teacher comes along."Woah are you like hacking a server" he said. Everybody around me started staring at me. I told him no im not. A couple minutes later he comes around again. The db viewer was closed and i was just in terminal trying to see if some changes worked. He said "Is this like the matrix or something???". I remembered i had a cmatrix package thing installed. I ran it. W O A H everybody around we was like. Luckily most people knew that
1. It wasnt hacking
2. I dont do hacking
3. I was doing it as a joke.
Although he must of been thinking that i was like a hardcore hacker in his class. Was weird and funny.

Productivity Hack: I'm a java developer who decided to write a productivity app that integrates to-do, pomodoro and eisenhower matrix altogether with reports generation. this will also help me logging at work. I'm also using electron + angular2 + typescript, just because, well, I'm trying to learn new stuff.

Long story short, many many many many days later, i'm still waiting for that productivity boost. What is dis webpack? Wat u mean loaders? Wat promises? electron-prebuilt is now electron? Wat u mean npm and node should be updated? .....

Please send help

Focus? Everything.. Downside? Not enough time to get good at everything. It depresses me. I see a language and framework and I Wana learn it and use it but I don't have the time cause I'm too busy coding on another platform. This makes me sad. I wish it were the matrix and I could download all languages syntax and apis into my brain so I could spend less time learning and more time making something significant. Okay okay, my focus is Java/Android with a dash of web

It wasn't at the office but when I was in middle/high school I used to swap powerpoint with a shortcut batch file that would loop til the computer freezes or just write a file that straight crashes. I also did the one with the gif of matrix. Fun times and never got caught! XD

Since it would probably mean the overthrow of human race from our throne, I think that the same scenario like in Matrix would happen. We won't go down without a proper fight, but we will go down. So I would probably apply to be their energy source (Matrix style). Main goal is, while I'm being packed in that weird eggshell, to look at it's 9001 ppi display and say: "Suck me bitch."
Best part? No more waking up early, no more responsibilities and being sucked for the rest of my life.
Fuck your petty resistance. You will never be Neo. Deal with it.

@dfox there's some glitch in the matrix. Check the timesamps.

God damn it, Gatling. Why didn't you put your fucking command line argument passing at the front of your docs instead of being buried under 'cookbook'? It's not a fucking recipe! it's core mother fucking functionality! "how do I run this command-line utility from the command-line by script?". "I don't know, maybe I should check the fucking cookbook since apparently it's not basic functionality that LITERALLY everyone using the fucking product will need!

So now I have to go back and parameterize one of the sims I've built AFTER I've mimicked our entire performance test matrix! FUCK!

oh you make games? I have a great idea for a game!
[pitches basically the fucking matrix in ridiculous detail]

[long confession/question]
So I was asked by a client to make an app similar to prisma(not exactly that but let's say a caricature app) and I knew I have to research a lot.

Now I have been loyal to PHP for over 5 years so I first tried with GD and imagick but the results were not very good, so I thought let's try opencv. I didn’t wanna make any compromises so I didn't go the bridging way, I worked on native python even though I am a newbie in it. I was fairly impressed with the cartoonizing results but others weren't. Soon I got to know that this would take much more than simple filter combinations or matrix manipulations.
I read about prisma and got to know it uses deep neural networks for the same.
Now, in the five years I have learnt almost all the things a run-of-the-mill "Full stack Web Developer" should know.
I have a fair knowledge of PHP, many of its frameworks, many js frameworks(obviously jquery), I have a very good understanding of CSS and its models, I have worked on some cool algos and found solutions to many problems but I haven't gotten to stage where I can implement neural networks/machine learning in my projects.
It just scares me.
___
A little back story: I have been the CTO of a small scale company for about 1.5 years now.
___
So all this got me to asking myself should I just step down from the post to a position where I can learn more skills. Managing takes a lot more time where I can't learn a lot. Sure I learnt some other important things but not as much tech knowledge as I would have in a more basic position.

I know not many of you must have read this far, but if you did what do you think I should do? Really depressed at the moment.

Client > requested scoreboard app

Me > Implementing full game logic to just output an Int 3x7x3 matrix

What's wrong with me?

*coding while day* "no motivation not inspiration.. need more coffee" && *coding while night* "I can see the matrix and bend it to my will"

You know how the machine learning systems are in the news (and Ted talks, tech blogs, etc.) lately over how they're becoming blackbox logic machines, creating feedback loops that amply things like racism on YouTube, for example. Well, what might the ML/AI systems be doing with our code repositories? Maybe not so much yet, I don't know. But let's imagine. Do you think it's probably less worrisome? At first I didn't see as much harm potential, there's not really racist code, terrorist code, or code that makes people violence prone (okay, not entirely true...), but if you imagine the possibility that someone might use code repositories to create applications that modify code, or is capable of making new programs, or just finding and squishing bugs in code algorithmically, well then you have a system that could arguably start to get a little out of control! What if in squashing code bugs it decides the most prevalent bugs are from code that takes user input (just one of potentially infinite examples). Remember though, it's a blackbox of sorts and this is just one of possibly millions of code patterns it's finding troublesome, and most importantly it's happening slowly (at first). Just like how these ML forces are changing Google and YouTube algorithms so slowly that many don't notice the changes; this would presumably be similar and so it may not be as obvious as one would think. So anyways, 'it' starts refactoring code that takes user input into something 'safer'. Great! But what does this mean? Not for this specific example really, but this concept of blackbox ML/AI solutions to problems we didn't realize we had, what does a future with this stuff look like (Matrix jokes aside)? Well, I could go on all day with imaginative ideas... But talking to myself isn't so productive, let's start a fun community discussion here! Join in if you find this topic as interesting as I do! :)

Note: if you decide to post something like "SNN have made this problem...", or other technical jargan please explain it as clearly as possible. As the great Richard Feynman once said, the best way to show you understand a thing is to be able to explain it clearly to others who don't understand it... Or something like that ;)

DOS and Wordstar, I was one of the few kids who submitted assignments on printouts from a dot matrix printer while everyone else was using typewriters. But what really got me hooked on computers? SimEarth and SimCity.

Downloads a whole bunch of training videos.
-this looks interesting (clicks magnet link)
-I want to learn this (clicks magnet link)
-This would be useful to know (clicks magnet link)

Watches 1 out of 100000 downloads
10+TB data

Secretly waiting for matrix like learning

! Rant

Matrix room for devrant community? I don't know if it has already been asked. And I don't even think there is a lot of people who know matrix anyway. But asking won't hurt :p

Everybody speaks about this "compatibility matrix" but nobody can produce an accurate copy anymore.

Inverting a 4x4 GL matrix is a traumatic experience.

trying to make a live usb disk. i took shots at random combinations from 2 usb sticks, 2 oses, different tools or technics on each os... each failed with a different outcome. then i realized i should have kept a failure matrix so that i don't try the same combinations, or can trace the roots of the problem.

each time i need to build a live disk, a part of me dies inside.

Guys, is any one worked with d3.js ?
I need a graph and my data source is a 2d array, A Boolean array I mean.
bool[,] matrix;

!rant

For the first time since I started work I used a matrix to find a formula.. Albeit it was for jquery.

Those hours and headaches spent studying math are paying off. Feeling a bit proud...

Fucking Yeoman, guys.
For a school project I thought I'd try it out to scaffold out my folder structure etc. Ran a php generator (not having commits since 2013) through npm and sipped my coffee while one node deprecation warning after the other filled my terminal.
Now I just feel like I'm sitting with my dick in my hand while staring at what looks like the fucking source code of the Matrix itself.
Does anyone use Yeoman for PHP projects anymore?
Well, at least Grunt works flawlessly 😎

"Any attempt to separate design, to make it a thing-by-itself, works counter to the inherent value of design as the primary, underlying matrix of life." - Victor Papanek

This is so related to devRant...
"To deny our own impulses is to deny the very thing that makes us human." - The Matrix

Become Neo ! And turn this shit hole into matrix

Any suggestions on Maker, Checker, Approver matrix design.

Dive into the Matrix

Remember in the Matrix how they learned things just by scanning a memory chip into their brain?

I think that's how learning programming languages should be...the technology should exist to make that happen :(