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Search - "wk112"
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Frontend Dev: That's not possible in Frontend, we should do it in Backend.
Backend Dev: That's not possible in Backend, we should do it in Frontend.
-- CIVIL WAR --27 -
Friend: Atom
Me: Vs Code
Friend: Light theme
Me: Dark theme
Friend: I believe there's some kind of energy that rules our destiny.
Me: Haha, seriously, no
Friend: (Starts telling me about some proposal of how he's going to build something).
Me: Yeah that's not going to work.
Friend: (Gets angry and proceeds to explain his idea on a whiteboard)
Me: Ahhhh yeah, sure it looks great
Friend: Dammit!!
Me: (I start telling him about some proposal of how I'm going to build something).
Friend: Yeah that's not going to work.
Me: (I get angry and proceed to explain my idea on a whiteboard)
Friend: Ahhhh yeah, sure it looks great.
Me: Dammit!!
If we didn't have such a solid friendship, I think we'd hate each other by now hahaha15 -
Best boss I have ever had?
He owned a car dealership and made me the first fulltime employed webdev in a car dealership in germany.
He believed in me and our mutual vision, and we had an awesome 7.5 years together. he gave me time to develop myself and to develop software and websites.
through my software and process optimization we were able to go from 300 sold cars per year to 3000 without hiring any more employees and without increasing workload and stress on the employees.
When I had my last day at his company, he didn't show up.
I was mad like hell, because we have spent so much time together, went to many countries together, even slept in the same hotel bed! I considered him pretty much a friend, even though he was my boss and 10 years older.
Much later he told me that he didn't show up on my last day because he didn't want to cry.
now we meet every 3 months and go out, eat and drink and just talk and laugh.
best guy ever, will never forget what he did for me.12 -
Do devs really fight or do we just mildly assert differing opinions then ignore each other for extended periods of time?3
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Certified enganeers!
Spaghetti masters!!
Those who dev in prod!!!
Push to master!!!
The "it's a feature" assholes!
The Madman Muntz misers!
The computer science and engineering fields are filled to the brim with fakers, phony's and Python Lords. I try to fight them every time but they outnumber me. Apparently money is more attractive than expressing your own passion.11 -
if( !condition ) vs. if(condition == false)
Pointless debate started with readability, turned into heated insults under 30 seconds 😂20 -
In the midst of a debate / discussion with a dev-friend ...
Me: Discussions with you are so exhausting.
Him: I don't discuss. I explain why I'm right.
... D:6 -
Fellow Dev: the clients are requesting a gallery on their website with functioning modals.
Me: okay cool
So for the record, I'm new to front-end and I've got quite a lot to learn in JavaScript.
*I googled as much as I could and I made a proper functioning gallery in 2 full days of coding*
Him: okay, so this is great but they aren't really digging it.
Me: *sigh* yes, so what do they want?
Him: have you seen how an image opens in Google images? Like you click on one, the image opens while the rest of the content shifts down?
Me: um... Yeah?
Him: yeah, so they want that.
Me: ... *Scoops the web trying to figure out how Google does it*. Dude, I can't find anything close to it and I've still got a lot to learn. Idk how to do it.
Him: well, you're being paid for that. So, you better do it.
Me: 1000Rs ( approx. 14.58$ ) isn't called "being paid". Gimme a break here.
Him: You're a novice rn.
Me: why don't you do it?
Him: I'm your boss.
*Sigh* (he indeed is my boss)
Him: deal with it.
Me: FU........C.....*suddenly I realized how it's done* OH OH OH OH I just got it, I just got it!
(I actually make something like that)
*Lol yay*
That's just my best story of a fight. Lol.5 -
Some former colleague just blatantly commented out units tests I wrote for his build to pass. What the...7
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- Let's use jquery to fix this
- No
- But it will work just fine
- I'd rather re-write the code and not use jquery in an angular project
- ...
- NO!10 -
That one time I was appointed to be a group project leader and forced my members to learn git. It was a fierce battle, but I did not give in.
Needless to say, I eventually got some thanks in return (after insults about git being complicated)9 -
Oh god, where to start? It is my job to fight against devs that likes to breaks RFC, do stuff stupidly or just do not actually know how stuff works7
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Him: "I don't need source control, it's just another program that does unknown things on my source files. What if one day it stops working?? How do I get my files??"
Me: "you could say the same thing on 90% of the tools you use every day... Like when you restore npm packages by GUI"
him: "what are those? I don't use them"
Also him: "command line is vintage"2 -
> be me
> work on a nice project with friends: A, B and C
> joined in a bit later, but before any real progress was made + we scrap the existing code, because it was Python2 or something
> decide on a framework
> A wants to create one himself, instead of using an existing one
> we fight for a little, but let A do his thing
> 2 months later
> been waiting the whole time
> +1000 lines on github, but still not finished
> "Wouldn't it be better if we would use the normal framework?"
> "No, mine is hand-crafted for that task"
> "But it is full of bugs"
> "If you find one major bug, we'll ditch my framework"
> finds major bug
> "That's fixed, just give me a min-"
> finds another bug
> "Thats just because you don't know how to use the framework"
- Documentation inside ONE gigantic README
- Library is missing the core features we needed/those which are implemented don't work
- Both B and C were on my side from the beginning (in that we should use "Already Existing Fully Documented Popular And tested Framework Which Does Everything We Need")
> "But i dont understand this framework so explain it to me"
> send him a few code examples + a tutorial??? (dont remember if i actually sent im the tutorial before i left)
> "explain it to me, i can't understand it"
> I CANT UNDERSTAND YOUR FUCKING FRAMEWORK DUMBASS
> ragequitted the server+project
To this day i still don't know, which framework they are using..
Also that Python 2 code in the beginning was because A didnt know the difference and copied (yes by hand) the code from atom to github without testing anything.4 -
This happened with one of our senior profs during the first year of my college. I wouldn't call him a dev if my life depended on calling him a dev but regardless, I narrate the story here.
We were "taught" C++ by some really dumb professors during our first year of college and it was mandatory that everyone cleared the subject regardless of what field of engineering the students chose. Having already done 2 years of C++, it was quite a breeze for me. But during the final lab exam, one of my friends requested my help in solving the quite tough question (for those beginners). Thinking the exam and teaching was unfair, I stupidly wrote the answer on a piece of paper and passed it to him. One of our teachers, who had seen him ask me, was lying low waiting to catch me in the act and she swooped in and busted our asses kicking us out of the exam hall and sending us to the HoDs office like some prize from her war against academic corruption.
In the end, I failed the exam for cheating and had to redo (not only the exam but the entire lab course).
When I returned to college during the summer vacations to redo the course, I first met the antagonist of our story. Having a huge head that looked like a deformed watermelon and an ego the size of a building, he assaulted us first with a verbal diarrhoea of his achievements as a CS professor. I quickly realised that I was in a class of people who had failed to grasp how to make a program that printed "Hello World". To make things shorter, every question the prof gave us, I managed to solve in a mere matter of minutes, several better than his own solutions. Not having expected a student who knew his shit, he was determined to play me down. He hurled tougher question at me and I knocked them over his enormous head piercing his ego. He asked me such questions as how to reverse 1000 and get 0001 and wasn't satisfied with the several ways I gave because none of it were what he had in mind (which turned out to be storing them in a fucking array and printing them in reverse. That's printing not reversing you dung beetle). I kept my calm throughout but on the day of the final exam, he set quite a tough paper for a class of people who had already failed once. To his utter shock and dismay, I aced that too and I produced flawless code. This man who has an MTech from one of the most reputed colleges of my country then proceeded to tell me that he had to cut my marks because I had used more than one function when the question had asked for one function ( it never said only one). I lost my shit and pointed out that since I was the programmer, it was my wish how I coded. I also explained to him how repeating code is a bad practice and one should use functions to reduce redundancy and keep the code clean. Nevertheless, he lost his shit and he threatened me with consequences as apparently "I didn't know who I was messing with". I handed over the paper and stormed out of the class (though he called me back and tried to argue more with me. I apologized for losing my shit and left when he was done talking). I ended up getting a 'C'. Totally worth it.4 -
I find a poor tester copy/pasting data from the test environment to the live one, as he accidentally broke it. I ask the DBA, " why isn't syncing SQL records part of the deployment pipeline?"
"You're front end. This is my job. Go do your job."
"... but it's an easy query, and you're exposing us to human error."
"You need to go sit down."1 -
I usually never had like a serious fight with a other dev I have a really good team but occasionally when I do this is my response. 🙂2
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Worst fight?
Stubborner against stubbornest.
About a focking fact that was trivially true or false. Fun fact: it didn't matter anyway.
Boy, did we raise our voices and attract the attention of everybody in the room. Lesson learned. -
Friend: PHP is trash.
Me: PHP is the most beautiful thing men created. And you're trash.
Friend: it's function(){
}
Me: it's
function()
{
}18 -
"How much of a dev are you, if you use other peoples work and just glue it together?" I once asked a friend who really loves npm and everything.
I know about code reuse and maintainability and all that but geez we had a long discussion..😅5 -
Rewrite of the sync api to REST.
Coworker: “hey, I know you’ve written and maintained our sync module for the past 4 years. Something I need to know? Some hints or knowledge you can share?”
Me: only thing you should not do is x and y. Otherwise you will face problems a and b.”
Coworker: “great, thanks a lot!”
2 months later...
Customer call: “da fuck are you doing? When I do stupid stuff then I face problem z and problem a!!!”
*me checking new code*
*me calling coworker*
Me: “WTF did you do? You asked for my advice and then did exactly what I told you NOT to do.”
Coworker: “oh, let me check the code..”
*coworker calls boss*
Coworker: “Boss, I can’t work with this guy, he starts fights all the time..”
*boss comes to my desk*
Boss: “I don’t want you to work on this anymore, people are complaining.”
Me: “what the fuck, I just asked him a question..”
~ 1 month later
coworker quits because he can’t handle all the bugs he caused and I have to maintain this piece of fucking retard code..3 -
Worst fight with another dev was whether a textbox should have a height of 24px or 28px ... It lasted 30 minutes to resolve that4
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- Sr said it's firewall's fault.
- I said it's not fw - it's gotta be application's fault.
- He walked away.
That was intense -
Me : java is suck.
Friend : php is suck.
Friend2 : c++ is suck.
Friend3 : network is suck.
Friend4 : security is very suck!
All : I agree.5 -
Friend’s code:
var monkey=77;
Go(monkey);
The worst thing in the world is reading someone’s uncommented code ...3 -
A little backstory first I was doing a project which had 2 phases for a class about databases. We worked in groups of 4. My group was with some friends of mine so I thought everything was going to be well divided and easy. Was I so fucking wrong. One of them always told me he was going to work but then did nothing, the other went on a vacation and I thought the third one had died. I had to single handedly write a story about the database, the clients requirements, design the conceptual logical and physical models and write a report of about 50 pages alone while balancing my other work. When I delivered this first phase one of them told me that he was sorry and he would do everything in the second phase. My dumb ass thought well maybe he had his reasons so I let it go. I waited like 2 weeks before starting to work on this because I was waiting for him to do something. A week before delivery he asked me for the initial database (which I had already put up on github) so he could start doing stuff. I told him I had already done it he said he would do the report conclusion. I waited and you know what happened. When I delivered the second project I snapped and told him he could go fuck himself. He told me that he didnt have internet at home (our home) but I knew he was at a mutual friends house playing on the ps4. I talked with him and said he should think about his fucking life because I know if somebody asked anything about databases he would know fuck all. After telling him he was worthless and that I would never be in a project with him again, I didnt talk with him for a while and I still talk about it (and I'm still pissed) with other friends who had similar experiences.2
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I have spent 2 hours fighting with another dev once about mysqli vs pdo and how mysqli is probably worse than pdo, turns out the only difference is that pdo supports more databases, where as mysqli only supports mysql, else their spec is basically the same. 😰2
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The three of us were all doing Java project for class. Within 5 minutes, we all merged our branches up to the integration branch, and everything broke.
Longest 2 hours of yelling ever. We took out all of the stops: git blames, reverting commits, the whole nine.
Turns out that someone accidentally pushed their .idea folder, which messed up everyone's system.2 -
I scoured my memory, and realized that I have never had a fight with another developer in all my years. Yes, there have been debates, but they were logical. There are even a few unresolved debates, due to preference and ideology, but never anything with enough emotion to be called a fight.
That's pretty cool. We are smart people and can discuss important issues without resorting to petty bickering.2 -
ME - me, TM - teammate
I was just recruited to the company. We're starting new project based on few modules.
ME: So this module will do X and Y, I will use good old interfaces and design based on abstractions so that stuff does not get glued too much.
TM: But why? Make good old processor with all the logic and throw objects at it.
ME: B-but unit tests, decomposition and othet stuff...
TM: *insists and forces me to agree*
ME: *gets shit done his way, TM checks on code review and complains but generally doesnt give a fuck*
ME: Ok, its done. Lets get shit shipped.
TM: Well, we were just told by PM that we will need to process one more source with much different logic that does not fit current solution (he did meant GOD-PROCESSOR, idea of his).
ME: What do you mean? *injects another contextual implementation of processing logic to template method pattern solution*.
TM: I will tell PM you cant make it because of the implementation.
ME: But I just did it...
TM: Impossible, processor needs to be reimplemented. Get your shit together!
ME: *still doesnt get the shit about the god processor love*
TM: *rage quits next month*
ME: *module gets reused once more 2 month later, profit* -
Most Devs I've met have been rational, so I'm fortunate enough to not have had a fight with a dev.
There was, however, one guy. Had to collaborate with him on a web app. I would fight with him almost everyday to not use deprecated tags, use proper CSS, not hack something together because it just works and the list goes on too long.
But I never succeeded in convincing him. Learnt that no matter how much you try, you cannot convince someone stupid -
Not a fight I was involved in but one I observed. A junior dev on my team and a server ops guy had major personality conflicts. One day the server ops guy had enough and physically went after the junior dev. I was senior but still pretty new to my own career and had no idea how to handle it. Server guy got fired soon after. I was glad I didn’t have firing power and that he didn’t even report to me anyways.2
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Not sure if yelling at someone for not listening counts as a fight.. 🤔 since he wasn't listening..ever!!
But yeah, my ex coworker was a champion in not listening and doing stoooopid shit, from not following orders, to cheking in all the files in solution to tfs (no changes + debugging shit etc) which made it a nightmare to find and fix his bugs.. I just gave up talking to him alltogether since he only wasted my time and didn't listen to any advice/order.. -
I had a school project with a friend, we concord to code some parts of the program, share it and explain the code so the teacher see the code was ours, when the final date come, after some doubts from my find we could delive the project with a not good note, the time passed and the teacher repeated the temps for a final protect, my friend was totally lost, the he arrives with all of his part, I questioned him about the code but he don't not so much abut, we almost fail the final protect because he buy the code to someone else and couldn't explain it to the teacher.
This was my face when I knew he cheated.1 -
My fights with other devs always revolve around the position of curly braces:
Should they be on the same line or should they have a whole line just for themselves?
I mean, if they go on the same line you have less lines of code and you can fit more into the same view, but putting them on a new line makes it all a little less messy7 -
I swear this mofo runs all of my code through pylint, he comments about every PEP8 inconsistency and every formatting decision he doesn't like.
Same guy also got in a small debate with one of our converts from the older project where they used C#, because he still writes everything in Windows-style CamelCase. After that, when we needed to decide on a password for a shared thing, I came up with "camel_case".1 -
why is everybody posting about wordpress & php?
fuck my life
fuck php
fuck $300 freelance wordpress websites3 -
Aye, I almost fight with everybody at work(they always think it is funny). I'm not good at listening to others when it comes to dev convo (like related to coding or some logic stuff).
So it is like someone is explaining to me that this should be like this and in between, I ask 100questions like "why like this? why not like this?","but what if I just skip it?" etc
and they always go like, "Someone is going to kill you so badly".
That's it. -
Me: Open Jira. See 8 point story skip QA column and move into Done.
Ask dev why it didn’t go through QA.
Teammate: Oh, did they want to test this?
Commence argument that **all** stories need to go through QA. -
@dfox I keep getting an error when trying to post my wk112 rant :\
It does have about 4986 characters in total...
All I get is "There was an error creating the rant."8 -
Hmmm! So I'm passive aggressive person. I don't argue with my fellow devs I post the their faults on devRant!
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Worst argument/fight was on a game I was working on.
One of the other devs was waiting for me to write some server Code before calling the endpoints on the client.
After writing the server Code I added the client side Code and committed it to our repo.
They had a massive go at me for doing work for them and threatened to remove my Code and replace it with their own code. -
Fight? I always have cold wars with my fellow developers and mostly with that senior ass who takes all the fucking credits and presentations..
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I "fight" with another developer at the end of a school project (a website).
The "other developer" complained because he had received a lower rating than mine.
He went to the teacher telling them that I had to lower the evaluation because during the project I watched TV series, And the teacher replied: there are those who can do it and some like you do not.
He could not do it because when he concentrated he could not do anything, you think when he lost himself in TV series.
There were various quarrels because I had this attitude but a higher rating (and anyway with a product a thousand times better than his), while he gave 100% he could not do anything.5 -
Not really a fight but another Dev was telling me how I should implement things and to keep the code clean and clear/not spaghetti.
In the back of my mind I'm going yeah... I know what I'm doing... probably better than you.
I'm usually the guy telling other ppl to clean up their shit..or forced to dig thru it when their stuff blows up in production.
Anyway I'm going to add him to code review and maybe email the whole team... and then go, now this is how I want our code to look.11 -
A developer couldn't get a application performance monitoring (APM) tool to trace his application. They claimed that their libraries and their configurations were alright and that the APM tool was non-performant.
The developer then argues with sysadmin that the APM tool can't trace the application and that there's nothing wrong with the application or the configurations. When sysadmin questions whether the developer got the tool to work anywhere, they say, "No" and head off to make it work at least in one place. They come back saying that it works on their development environment (which is their local machine). Sysadmin claims that the system configurations on the server instances cannot be matched by the development environment and there could be a lot more factors to be considered for the problem. The sysadmin asks to prove it on a server instance on one of the test environments and then they'd agree that it is a problem with the tool. They also argue that this is not the only application that uses the APM tool and the tool happily traces other applications with no issues.
The developer tries the same configuration on a staging instance and fails. In order to make it work, they silently uninstall the existing version of the APM tool and then compiles an unstable branch of the tool. It finally works with this version.
They go back to the sysadmin and show that it works on the staging environment, but does not on production. After banging their head on the wall for a while, the sysadmin figure that the tool had been swapped out for the unstable branch that was manually compiled. When questioned, the developer responds, "It works with this version on staging, so deploy the same version on production"
WTF? You don't deploy an unstable branch to production. Just because you can't make it work on the stable branch doesn't mean that it is the problem with the tool itself. There's a big difference between a stable branch and a non-stable branch. How would you feel if the sysadmin retorted by asking you to deploy the staging branch of your application to production? -
Someone raised a PR for the opensource project "fast XML parser". Since this was a major change, it was difficult to review. I asked for the purpose and requested to break it into multiple PRs, where 1 PR should have related changes only. And any good change but unnecessary change can be avoided to scheduled for later.
We had long arguments for a month or two.
I don't know why but instead of breaking the PR, the contributor keep updating his PR for every commit someone made on the original repo.
He also stopped contributing for other changes, and commenting on other issues. (Change in the behavior)
Finally after 5-6 months, I had to close the PR as it was not active, having conflicts and not as per guidelines. -
I once had a heated discussion with another developer over whether AngularJS is backend or frontend. For some reason he believed it's a backend framework.1
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A constant fight because the code style matters. If you think it doesn't, just go and die already.
If any of you great folks with no sense of code style are reading this, fuck you, fuck you all, you should leave your jobs and yes I am talking about these assholes who have like 15-20 years of experience in the industry but surprisingly I never heard of anything they made.1 -
Some time ago Ex-Boss, who's also a Dev, asks for some opinions about which JS framework we should use in our next project. I gave my 2 cents about react JS and he said no, react won't be any good, we must use Aurelia because it is backed up by Rob etc etc. At that moment I thought: wth is he asking, if he has already made its mind on Aurelia? As at that moment react was getting some hype and I knew the features and advantages, I kept going. Boss, react has shadow DOM. React has this, it has that etc. This discussion ended up with him raising his voice, telling me he is much more experienced than me and telling me to GTFO. That's what I did. And thanks God I did it. I respect other opinions and beliefs but If I'm asked to give my own opinion I will, even if they don't like it.
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Not a fight per se, but I once had a debate with a tech lead who thought you could set a variable in the ‘then’ clause of a Javascript promise and just use said variable after the promise declaration and assume it would be populated.
“no.... thats not how asynchronous code works.”1 -
Worst one was git rebase vs merge with me defending merge against rebasing everything into a single commit before review... making my existence on this planet miserable.1
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My worst fight with a dev was definitely that time I tried to break the mould and build this incredibly tedious VB app to automate data handling through Excel, PowerPoint and Outlook. The other dev always said "you can do this" and "come on, it's not rocket science" and I was always like "yeah, dude, sure, but can you help me with this bit here, please, I'm so stuck on it?" He'd be all like "ofc bro, I got your back", but when it came to the actual work that needed to be done, he was all silent. Needless to say, now I have a rubber ducky to help me with my dev needs, as talking to myself felt like a nightmare. Guess that's what other people feel like when I strike up a conversation with them, too.
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Never had a real fight referring to any development - stuff, because most devs around me are more experienced and most of the time I can see the point in their opinions. I definitely had some discussions about some constructs in C++ for example. But thats it.
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Relating back to my wk112 rant, after my team member threatened to remove my code I almost screamed at them...
We’ve since reconciled and are quite good friends -
I never had a fight. And I mean never at all, not just dev-related.
I'm not sure that this is a good thing.
Sometimes I wonder, does this mean that I'm a good diplomat, or that I'm not relevant enough to argue with?1 -
Last fight was with a teammate. He turned so paranoic about using JavaScript. He says that using tools from the browser like localStorage id a risk and can fail easily. (The detail here is: if you ask him what is ES6, you blow his mind)
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During a fight with a co-worker usually it is not about what happens in that moment. I kinda keep my cool.Then later I become passive aggressive. Start replying with single word responses. Intentionally get that dumb fuck into trouble during meetings. Sarcasm overflows.
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We had a discussion about coding style. At one point I said that it’s his personal opinion and not an objective fact. He went full on rage mode and said that he takes this as an personal attack. Then another dev chimed in, telling me to listen to the older devs, because they know more.
Not really a big fight, but stuff like this makes me mad as hell.1 -
Throughout most of my programming career so far, I haven't had too many fights or major arguments with other developers, which is probably some kind of miracle. Although I think this stems from where each job I have been in (except 1 job), I seem to have much more knowledge than the other developers. So even if an argument/discussion would come up, I could usually reason with them logically.
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Not really a fight, but a disagreement that lead to some big changes in my mind.
When entering my school, I still had a part of me wanting to do game development.
I'm gonna make it short : We wanted to do a game in Java at school in first year, but one wanted to do it in C because didn't feel good with Java.
And I always sum that experience up by saying "Never again." The atmosphere in the team was very friendly, but that's the only good part of it. I hated doing that project, and it removed that small will of doing game dev (as a paid main job).
Maybe it would have changed if it was later during my studies, since I was still learning how to code during that project.
But I guess it showed that I was maybe not that motivated to do games.2