Happens only in Bangalore...

Once Ashish was travelling by train in A/c class. He was traveling from Mumbai to Bangalore!

He was traveling alone!

Some time later, a Beautiful lady came and sat in the opposite berth!

Ashish was pleasantly Happy!

The lady kept smiling at him! This made Ashish even more Happy!

Then she went and sat next to him!

Ashish was bubbling with Joy!

She then leant towards him and whispered in his ear " Hand over all your valuables, cash, cards, mobile phone to me
else I will shout and tell everybody that you are harassing and misbehaving with me"

Ashish stared blankly at her!

He took out a paper and a pen from his bag and wrote " I can not hear or speak. You write on this paper whatever you want to say"

The lady wrote everything what she said earlier and gave it to him!

Ashish took her note, kept it in his pocket!

He got up and told her in clear tones..."Now shout & scream!!"

MORAL OF THE STORY : *DOCUMENTATION IS VERY IMPORTANT*

😄😀😄

Visited Google Bangalore today for a Go session

A female boss I worked for, pulled an employee retention tactic that still gives me the chills.

She paid dogshit salaries to all her employees. And yelled at them enough to keep them overworked and burnt out.

When one of them tried to resign, she said "fine you can leave us but I won't be giving you any salary slips, no experience/recommendation letter and neither acknowledge that you ever worked here.
You get to leave the company when I decide for you.
You have already stayed here so long that if you decide to disappear tomorrow it will leave a gap on your resume in your next interview."

The entire reason I became a developer was so that I could one day build something that I can say has/had a handful of users, that I could build something that helped save someone's life, that helped someone in their time of need.

That reason was fulfilled when I built my only successful and proudest project during a cold night in 2011. I was 16 at the time, and here in South India, there was a major cyclone affecting a portion of our country (Chennai/Tamil Nadu). A lot of my family were in affected areas, and I didn't know what I could do being so far away (around 400kms/250mi away, in Bangalore).

I stayed up all night to build what was then known as ChennaiRains.org. It was a simple website, a directory and a safe house for everyone's information. Whoever needed help, whoever was ready to give help, whoever was volunteering their travel, their time. I didn't think it would help much. I just wanted to make a small difference.

Next morning, after the hangover of the all-nighter I pulled faded away, I see that the website went viral after a few shares on Twitter. The community was so supportive of my little project to help my family and friends. It caught a peak traffic of a million users overnight, no ads, no money made from this, I just earned the experience of a lifetime. It eventually helped a lot of people in need, connected a lot of volunteers and victims.

It has been the epitome of my life. It's the reason I still develop applications to-date, even if they are simple. Somewhere out there, someone needs it, and I want to be able to help to them :)

Indian Product Management community is the shittiest community for any professional domain.

Everyone is just focused on being a guru preaching shit to others when they themselves no nothing about the function or possess any significant skill(s) to perform at their job.

A bunch of bozos, themselves struggling to stay afloat, are saving others. Fucking hilarious.

What makes this worse is that the entire community is so inclined towards "cracking the interview" and landing a job.
Instead what they should be focusing on is teaching them younglings what the role is and how to develop the right skill set. More importantly why the role exist in the first place.

That way, they will automatically land a good gig and solve critical user problems.

No wonder, most products these days are bloated with garbage and PMs are only focused on engagement, retention, and more fancy buzzwords which make absolutely no sense.

My tinder status:

//Recently relocated to Bangalore

looking for friendship();
beauty += brains;
turn_ons = {tech_talks, humour, adventure};
turn_offs = {selfie_addiction, crap_chat, discussing_people};
If (you in turn_ons &! turn_offs)
swipe right();
else
swipe left();

Genuine question:

What's the most poverty you have experienced? No troll answers please.

I'll tell you mine, I lived in Bangalore in 2018 when I was starting out living in a PG with 2 strangers, and I had to travel like 9 kms to my office, 7 kms by bus and 2 kms walk.

I was walking, listening to music as usual, when I felt uncomfortable with the sunshine burning my skin. So I thought, let me hire an autorickshaw and get to my job. But doing so, will result in no lunch today and if I wasted money on auto and lunch both, I won't have any money for the bus fare.

That feeling was my rock bottom thinking "Holy crap, I'm poor."

That incident is what I compare myself to, sometimes, and I think "Well at least it's not THAT bad."

 If you throw a stone randomly in Bangalore(Silicon valley of India), chances are, it will hit a dog or a software engineer. While the dog may or may not have a strap (a.k.a. leash) around his neck, the software engineer will definitely have one.

I'm so fucking frustrated with my ex company CEO, this motherfucker made everyone move to Bangalore costing is employees a good chunk of their salary and this delusional ASSHOLE knew that only half of the expected funding was coming in January 2023 itself and they'd be out of funds by July/August, they let go few folks from the team, fired the entire marketing team and expected to make the product profitable. The only reason I had stayed at that time was because the product was interesting to build and the scale I was working with was crazy like 100k request per minute peaks and avg of 10k rpm. I left the company in August...

This MOTHERFUCKER hasn't paid out final settlement after leaving for most employees and he openly says to the folks who are still working there that paying us is not his priority.

I hope your Atlas cluster gets fucking deleted, accesses revoked and entire AWS setup goes down forever, bitch.

We can't goto courts because the company law tribunal needs atleast 1 crore (1.2 million usd) of unpaid dues to declare it insolvent in a years time..

This asshole deducted taxes from our salaried but didn't pay them to the income tax department for an entire fucking financial year.

What a cheating, delusional, sick bastard. And he's still not willing to sell off the company to pay off the debts and call it a day.

Aarrghhhh on top of losing 2-3k USD I might have to pay my taxes approx 5-6k USD to the govt to keep my records well maintained.

What a grade A delusional asshole 😡
If he won't clear the dues till December, I'm gonna launch a mass of social media posts and destroy his reputation so that he doesn't get one penny of VC funds in the future I'm gonna make sure of that...

BANGALORE JOKES by Bangalorean....

👉If you throw a stone randomly in Bangalore, chances are, it will hit a dog or a software engineer.
While the dog may or may not have a strap around his neck, the software engineer will definitely have one ! 😜

👉In India we drive on the left of the road.
In Bangalore, we drive on what is left of the road !😜

👉Q: What is the easiest way of causing traffic accidents in Bengaluru?
A: Follow the traffic rules !😜

👉A guy is hunting for a house in Bengaluru.
Meets old lady who is a potential landlord.
Conversation goes thus:
Old lady: "Where do you work, son?"
Guy: "I work in Infosys."
Old lady: "Oh, that bus company! Sorry, we rent only to good IT people!"
It appears that Infosys operates more buses than BMTC in Bangaluru!😜

👉Bengaluru, where PG (Paying Guest) is the first business and IT, the second.😜

👉When someone says it's raining in Bengaluru, be sure to ask them which area, which lane and which road!😜

👉If a Bengalurean stops at a traffic light, others behind him stop too because :
The others conclude that he has spotted a
policeman that they themselves have not!😜

👉Bengaluru is the only city where distance is measured in units of time.😜

👉Rickshaw driver, grocery seller and common shop keeper think that you earn atleast 1 lakh per month if you are in IT sector.😜

👉Out of every 100 software engineers in Bengaluru,
90 are utterly frustrated and the rest have a gf/bf !😜or they are married.

👉Bus drivers use horns instead of brakes !😜

👉I quote: Bengaluru:
The City where more people know Java than Kannada !

👉Universal answer in Bengaluru is
"Adjust maadi!"
😜😜😜

*Power cuts are the only time the whole family assembles together and members speak to each other.
Seeing this, BESCOM has decided to have a tagline called "Connecting people by disconnecting power"!

DEVRANT INDIA MEETUP

@GDD Bangalore, Dec 1 and 2

It will be awesome to meet all the devs who are attending the GDD at Bangalore. So lets make a group chat and plan a way to spot each other 🤓

Group Link in comments 😊

@ Oracle code event, Bangalore. Anyone here?

Got my first job as a Software Engineer @CognitiveClouds Bangalore, India.

Enjoying a lot.

just to know anyone from bangalore India in dev rant?

Dear digital ocean, don't sponsor an event and have the entire development challenge on digital ocean if your website won't accept my and 40 other contestants' cards.

German public service digitization. Websites celebrating the new "digital functionality" of the federal ID card, but if you need to prolong the actual card, you have to visit a public administration center in person, no way to prove your existing valid ID in a zoom meeting although that's de-facto standard accepted even when opening a bank account, plus they have all of my data so they should know I have a valid ID and they could just send the new one to my postal address.
So I have to appear in person at their offices, so I need an appointment, but in times of covid pandemic, appointments are rare and only offered on a day-to-day basis in my hometown, that's why I have to visit their online appointment web app at 7 a.m. in the morning to grab one of the few appointments when they are released.
Don't tempt me to write a script that squats all the other appointment slots to resell at the highest prices...

Situation reminds of the times when it was even harder to get a vaccination against covid, and the media kept reporting about the minority that refused to get vaxxed, so they didn't have to admit there wasn't enough vaccine anyway.

This rant is not about politics, it's about the failure of bureaucracy, but if it was about politics, I would just quote Rezo that it shows who had governed this state for sixteen years.

When I rant about German internet connectivity, people usually reply that the web is much better in Taipeh, Bangalore or Guadalajara, so I can still have some hope that it's not all of the world that's totally lost.

So give me some hope, folks.

Need Advice....
So, I moved to Bangalore after graduation this year and I am interning at a startup till Jan in Android Development. It's a six month internship. Everybody I meet gets surprised after hearing that I took up the internship even after graduation and that it's 6 months long.
I actually interviewed at a couple of places before accepting this internship and all those startups were like the next Facebook, the next Instagram, the next blah...Blah...Nothing new...And this opportunity felt like something where I would learn something new...
But as I meet people every now and then and as the financial ground below me keeps on shrinking, I keep on questioning my desicion.
BTW I am searching for good job opportunities but again can't find any exciting opportunity and the ones I find don't even give an opportunity for the interview...

how can I start freelancing?
i learnt js CSS and HTML and aspiring for node js.but would like start freelancing sideways. any rants ?

Outsourcing brings brilliant logic on daily basis #fail

Programmers are freaks with three limbs and square heads. During your fiery conference speech, as the crowd laughs, one filth, who is your manager, tells another filth, who is someone else’s manager: “Look, this is my mule. Can code many hours. Don’t has to pay many moneys. My mule is more good than your mule. In Bangalore, they ask very many moneys for this mule.”
And you know damn well that when in Bangalore they ask less, you’re gone in a flick of a pen. Your company sent you to give this talk. Meetup? No, just a freak show for mules. Is it a dick measuring contest for investors? No, not at all. As you speak, this filth is fucking his secretary in Aruba while his wife is dying of cancer in Miami. And the supreme filth, the one that has no eyes and no mouth? It grins. Go mule, spaces versus tabs. Vim versus Emacs. Linux versus macOS. Divide and conquer.

Hands down, one of my seniors in my bachelor's degree. His name is Mohit.

He helped me out with course materials, gave me guidance on tech and emerging technologies, gave me books, video lectures, cheat-sheets u name it.

Guy is a massive nerd, he used to be holed up in his room for days. And oh yeah, he also wasn't shy with sharing his knowledge and internet downloaded data, which was a pretty massive deal in 2012 when internet and WiFi was crazy expensive.

Also, he would ask me what games I needed so he would download it for me and hand it out for free.

That guy is the reason I even chose tech industry to have a career in to begin with. Last I heard from him, he got fucked up by a girl and decided to move to Bangalore and start a company. That company has net-worth of $4.5 million so he's doing pretty well.

Hey, anyone in ethIndia hackathon (Bangalore, India ) !?
Iam searching for a team !
If anyone can take me in ?
I am newbie to block chain, but can do some stuff !
Please comment, if ur interested!

Got my ticket today for DROIDJAM who else is coming

Very surprised to know that an IPhone can geotag the photos even when the SIM card is not active and no means of any internet connection(wifi or someone 's hotspot)
My IPhone 7 is contracted in US with AtAndT,quite obvious it doesn't work in India(I am on vacation).
Still,the pics recognized the Taj Mahal,Red Fort,my locality(Bangalore-South),etc..

Anyone at Google DevFest 2019 in Bangalore here?

Bangalore will shutdown for a week to avoid spreading of corona virus.

Hey Guys,
I'm from Bangalore, India. And I am planning to setup work station at home. Does anybody any pointers or sample workstations you already have set it up and running?

Who else is coming, I got mine confirmation

!rant
Super pumped to be leaving for my hometown,Bangalore tomorrow after a little more than 3 years.😊

Anyone attending Kubernetes Forum Bengaluru in India today?

Desperately need advice from devs in India...
asking this here since really stressed about this and don't know who to ask to...
I am an engineering student from Bangalore, India from a basically no name college...
I have been coding for 2 years now, web stuff, primarily rails and js...
i have worked with handful of startups, done internships, and am working on my own projects which i will launch soon...
Lately my college has made it a mission to make my life hell even though i always perform well academically...it has gotten to a point where I am not able to work or learn anymore...
I wanted to ask what consequence my career will face if I drop out ?
I believe lack of a graduation degree will make me not eligible for many jobs...please suggest what I should do...

I realised I can't grow much and work on my skills if I stay in my city anymore. Development hype is way too less here.
What are some of the ways I can get internship in a startup in Hyderabad/Bangalore/Mumbai/abroad ? I wanna help a team to develop their product ( Android/Node/ Firebase/Python ).
Thing is I couldn't complete any worthwhile projects to get a great internship.

Any Indians who do @TDD?

Sorry guys, just for statistics.

I don't understand women sometimes.

Context: So, How government jobs work in India, is that you have to move to a new job posting location every 3-4 years. Not forever though, more like the first 20 years or something.

It can be a city or a village. And you can't say no against moving there. You'd have to quit the job which in India, is a MASSIVE deal.

My cousin sister had her job posting in Jaipur where she lived with her kid and husband. And soon enough, the news came that her new job posting is in Bangalore, which is about 2500 KMs away from Jaipur.

2 months ago, she and my aunt made a full-on hoopla in front of us saying things like - She'll quit her job. I don't care what it is, but family is always first priority blah blah blah...

Fast forward to today, she's living alone in Bangalore.

Buy best properties in bangalore

To all the Indian developers in here— how’s the comparison between Bangalore and Pune in terms of tech opportunities, startups etc. I know Bangalore traffic is bad as I’ve been there once. And the city didn’t seem very metropolitan. But it seems to have a more vibrant tech scene than Pune.

should I join any private colleges for engineering CSE in Bangalore or somewhere when the total expenses will be around 15 Lakhs. Is it worth it?