Searching where an event takes place at, Google says "the Earth"

The most stupid question you can ask at an open source software event?

"So, this system, is it open source?"

I asked this to a guy at a stand about the system he was presenting (forgot the project name).

He stared at me with a wtf face and then replied with "....yes.... of course.... this is an OPEN SOURCE software event?!"

I felt quite fucking stupid.

(regarding a discussion with a female programmer about an event)

Me: ... But Id feel so out of place, I don't even have a date

Female: well you can always just import a date

Me: what do you mean? 😕

Female: import Java.util.Date;

@dfox thank you for sponsoring our event with goodies. I think devrant gained a few Dutchies tonight. Ive also made sure @linuxxx could grab some (yea try to spot him on the picture!).

1. Start working in company that is celebrating something the same day you start new job.
2. Make sure they invite you.
3. Get drunk hard before event.
4. Puke on a CEO during his opening speech.

Mission accomplished you’re now a legend.

At an event and the speaker says "No one develops native apps anymore".

I am next,talking about developing native android apps.

Had a former customer call a few (10) years ago, furious that we shut down their website.

Me: but you moved your website to another provider 2 years ago? We dont even provide webhosting any more?

Turns out, when they moved we put a redirect to their new site on our server.

During the summer this server was decommisoned due to a failing harddrive but since we no longer had any active customers on it we just pulled the plug.

The customer had never actually redirected their domain name. :)

When we sent them a copy of their own cancellation letter we got an "oh hell, sorry".

:D

So true but its really sad that people buy anything from them... 😐

BOYS ITS HERE

WE FINALLY GOT SPACE VACUUM IN PHOTO

Coolest project: I once worked for a customer who hosted an exhibition for a few thousand visitors in a big event arena in Stockholm.

They didn't want to use the existing ticket reading system on the arena so I had to build my own application compatible with barcode scanners (they said this about one week before the event).

It wasn't a complicated application to dev but with the tight deadline and no time to actually stress test it, it was the coolest thing to see hundreds of people streaming through the ticket station flawlessly.

Day 2 of the event I built a simple web application so I could see the flow rate of read tickets while I sat in the arena pub with a beer.

"Oh you make games!
Can you make something like Pokemon Go? We you need to make it quick cause we only have 10 days till the event."

😓

In our self-developed intranet, i added a hidden script that fires an 'event' when you enter the konami code.

Said event it's simply turning thw screen contrast to 200% and play the audio of 'omae wa mou shindeiru'.

I was planning to make some more of those, but i don't have the time to do them ;_;

Currently at a cyber security event.
The most ironic thing is that the WiFi here is not secured...

My first experience with Swift ended in me infecting myself with a virus (kinda). I wanted to create a macOS app that would listen for a global key event, catch it and then type a word.

During development I set it up to listen for ANY key event and to type "BALLS". So what happened? I compiled the code, everything looked good, I started the app and pressed a key which emitted a key event. The event was caught by my app and it typed "BALLS", just as expected. However, the typing of the word caused a NEW key event to be emitted, which the app also caught. The infinite loop was a fact. FUCK!

I tried closing down XCode but all I could see was "BALLS BALLS BALLS" everywhere. I tried everything I knew but it just kept typing "BALLS". I had to hold down my power button to make it stop.

I finally finished the app (which I named "The Balls App", I kept the word "BALLS"). I solved this issue by only listening for KeyUp and when emitting the "BALLS" word I just used KeyDown.

Any social event.
"I'd rather be coding."

When DigitalOcean sends you schwags for your event.😍😍😍

My young brother just destroyed everyone at a speedcubing competition!

4x4, 3x3 one handed, 3x3 regular (the main event), skewb, pyraminix — all 1st places!

So back in January 2015 I bought my first Mac and wanted to learn Swift. Coming from .Net C# IBOutlet was anew concept for me, had to search for how to make a button event and Google gave that 😐

**I just googled it for the sake of this rant but ya it happened 😅

Today I got yelled at for planning to skip work because I had pressed interested on a Facebook event that occurs at the same time as a overtime work event....

On a company meeting there was a discussion wether to trigger an event by hover or mouse click for 20 minutes. then..
Me: "There is no mouse click without hover."
-- silence --

I was building a controller for an autonomous RC car at a racing competition. We were having issues with line detection leading to poor performance in the steering module. For the drag race we pioneered an innovative new steering strategy: never steer. Won the event.

One of my older servers just went down. It's been hacked. How do I know this you ask? Is it mining bitcoin?

No - windows event viewer has no errors in the logs for the last 48 hours.

You all remember the hackathon (my first coding event ever)I went to last Saturday?

Well, the founders of the org whose project I worked on offered me an internship on Thursday!

So apparently due to an extremely talkative x input driver and an error in a certain app, I've been running an emergent keylogger on my computer for half a year. On every keypress event, the driver would call the app, the app would segfault, the driver would log the incident including the event to /var/log and then crash, and the app would restart the worker. I noticed this when I started wondering why /var/log is over 100GB in size.

Is @trogus and @dfox ever coming to an EU event? Would really like to meet you guys 🙂

The live devRant AMA/event thingy is in a few hours I think?

Gotta go to sleep right fucking now.

Don't want to get spoiled by the rants tomorrow morning.

This means nearly a whole day of no devRant 😫.

Anyways, good luck dfox and trogus!

DEVDUCK ADVENTURES 0x03

Sir duck the first is hanging out with me and @hyperlisk at the FRC 2018 kickoff event.

I'm holding a programming class today, it's an open-door event, so anyone can come and try it out.
Nothing too much, just basic things.

I've been holding it for 30 min... To no one... No one showed up...

I've just come back from a business networking event. There was a speaker who gave a talk about not wasting time.

On of her points was catching up on emails, from your smart whilst waiting to go into meetings, as that's apparently wasted time.

All I do whilst waiting to go into meetings is read devrant :)

It puts me in s good mood :)

Ooooh I feel savage. I got this little USB-Stick from an event of Microsoft and I am using it to install Linux on every computer I can get in between my fingers.

literally lol'd out loud when I saw this. Found in the source of popular event loop library libev, in ev.c line 214:

So I studied for a long time about scrum, convinced my boss, his boss and our team to consider it, everyone liked it but seems to don't understand it very well.

I organized meetings about it and everything...

This week the majority of our team will attend a Google event about scrum in another city.

Guess who is not going?

Confession.

Got invited to a company party by a friend. I forgot they worked for Comcast. Realized when I got there it was a Comcast sponsored event. Got told on the way not to engage in any anti-Comcast rants at the event.

Couldn't really backout, so went anyway. Feeling guilty, dirty and like a complete sellout.

Awe yeah, step one complete: Node.JS event emitters implemented in Python. Baby steps!

So apparently my university is doing a privacy promotion event... if only I had the time to go..

What do you get at a Pirate event?

Arrrrrrrrrgs!!

When Google messes up while creating a Google Form.

This is from the feedback form for a Google event

Found an issue where my double click event was not functioning correctly, so I added a break point and then it diddnt work at all... its taken me an hour to realise that if I breakpoint the click event, of course I'm never going to fire the double click event...

Successfully launched after 9 hours of bug fixing and patching. Let's se what will happen tomorrow. It's now 01.56, and I wanna sleep... Good night.

I enjoy watching the Microsoft events, as they always introduce something completely new, that no one's really made before. Unlike certain companies *cough* Apple *cough* who just slap a better processor on their existing devices and calls it "revolutionary". I like all this innovation

The worst part of hackathons are schedules which leaves no time for actual coding!
I was once at 2 day event. Day 1 contained an intro lecture, 'getting to know your team' exercise, idea generation phase, idea feedback from industry people, mandatory coffee breaks, and a little bit of coding at the end.
Day 2 consisted of 'adding thet final touches to your hack', a random lecture from the company hosting the event, info from the judges on how to pitch, a trial run of the pitch and then the final pitches...
I barely think we got to code for 3 hours.

OH MY FUCKING BATMAN, WHY THE FUCK DOES THIS WEBSITE SHOWS ME A POPUP WHEN I HAVEN@T EVENT FINISHED READING THE FUCKING ARTICLE. FUUUUUUUUU

Joined a call during a potentially important life event. Work laptop password expired this morning, personal laptop didn't connect to vpn, desktop not connecting to vpn. No one knew what's wrong on the call (just that it's not working).

Not a good call.

This meme gets alive on every apple event...

You want to call a function? STOP!!!
Nowadays it is so amateur and old fashioned! Instead you must:
- Make a soap request
- Write a router to handle soup requests
- Write an XML to define which controller responds to this request
- Write an XML parser on top of another XML parser
- Write a controller to trigger an event in response to the request
- Write an XML which defines the event
- Write an XML that defines the event observer
- Write a plugin which calls event observers
- Write a router which delegates the task of calling event observers to that plugin
- Write an event observer which calls another plugin
- Write a plugin that "Calls a function".
It's better because... it's more Object Oriented!

Acording to google in the madebygoogle event, google assistant can remember things...

friends project: android app that start counting when touch event happens.

and fails to do so...
(after substancial help, I showed him wht ge failed but did understand)

A company hires him as android developer...

not sure I am glad for him, this cannot end well...

Let's talk about input forms.

Please don't do that!

Setting time with the arrow buttons in the UI.
Each time change causes the page to re-fetch all the records. This is fetching, parsing, rendering tens of thousands of entries on every single click. And I want to set a very specific time, so there's gonna be a lot of gigs of traffic wasted for /dev/null.

Do I hear you say "just type the date manually you dumbass!"? I would indeed be a dumbass if I didn't try that. You know what? Typing the date in manually does nothing. Apparently, the handler is not triggered if I type it in manually/remove the focus/hit enter/try to jump on 1 leg/draw a blue triangle in my notebook/pray

OK, so I was making this website for a university event. After publishing it, I start getting calls that the registration form isn't working. So I review the code and fix the problem. But when I push it to production, the problem still persists, all this while the event management is breathing down my neck because they can't get any registration! kept on trying for the whole fucking day, switched off my phone and went to sleep! The next morning, I find out, I had been pushing the old version of the file! Yes! I felt incompetent and stupid!

What happens if you break your hand/arm/wrist and it requires an arm sling (picture attached)? Can you still work or what? I'm assuming it varies from company to company or something. Do you have anything in place for preparation for this event?

So there is an ad for an event that claims that they got 96% likes on Facebook. What do they mean, did 96% of all facebook users worldwide like it? Or did 4% find out how to dislike a page on fb? I am confused

Was presenting an idea today for an IoT Challenge event. This was the first question by the judge:

"What will you do if internet isn't there?"

Started development on a Firefox addon again:

Adding an onclick HTML tag/property (however you call that) - doesn't fire at all.

Adding an event listener - says no elements with the class I'm using (checked, it's correct) exist, doesn't fire.

Well, fucking great 😐

Back in college I studied web development.
Google came to campus and hosted and event. So a fellow classmate asked me: what's this event about?
Replied: it's Google hosting an event talking about HTML5, we should definitely go & attend.
She stops for a second and replies back: umm why exactly?
- Because we're web development branch and this is related...?

Put stickers on your notebooks!

I was at an event where different companies present themselves to the students at my school. There was one company that I wasn't interested in at first but then saw a git and a npm sticker on one of the notebooks standing at their booth.

Long story short: I talked to them and now got an internship there.

Ffs people get the fuck out off that Gitlab. I've been there sooner than you, now can't event load login form.

So I got accepted to M.Sc abroad, and while it is by itself a very uplifting event, it was nothing compared to the satisfaction I derived from telling my boss that I quit.

Allright, that was srsly cool!
We are doing family trips across Lithuania on weekends. This weekend we have visited a "gravity hill".

So basically here's what you do:
- drive your car down the slope, to the bottom
- stop the car. Leave at neutral
- the car itself starts moving.. UP TO THE HILL!!

I was sceptic, but ffs, it took my car less than 2 minutes to reach 25km/h from a point zero!!

I even tried once more with my engine turned off. The same thing happened :)

I don't like marketing people (nothing personal).
Most of those I had to communicate with, do lack anything that would remotely come close to brain activity.
A handful of days before the start of a huge event, for which we made a VR game over 2 months, they have the ovaries to tell us that the spectator TV doesn't fit the event's design and thus the VR game will not be shown at the event.
Wow.
Thankfully, half a day later, their CEO directly wrote us and told us to ignore them and to proceed with the preparations for the game.

It's almost time to go off to another FIRST robotics competition!

Good luck to all the other teams and extra good luck (is that even a thing?) To the teams competing in a week 4 event!

In the meantime, I will be spending my last day in <city name> working on some auto code with @hyperlisk

Company: Hi mordax, your profile shows you have an impressive background -
Me: Oh!
Company: So I'd like to extend an invitation-
Me: Oh!!! (Interview!!)
Company: - to a Women in Tech(™) event hosted by the company.
Me: Oh.

just learned that Kafka exists.
I was almost going to build an event bus from scratch, phew

recent life event:

installed Windows and updated it.

iPhone 8 event today! Who else is ready to be disappointed?

I keep a 20 year old PS/2 keyboard around specifically for that rare event I need to edit my bios settings. My mobo doesn’t enable usb until half a second after it stops listening for input because who uses usb keyboards, anyway?

Went to a "Javascript Cafe" wearing async t-shirt..

They put me last on the events queue :(

Any devRanters at SHA2017?

On a company event. Supposed to do some water skiing.

I'm no fucking Jesus, I can't walk on water! Leave me alone!

Also, I am NOT interested in seeing my teammates in swimsuits. Yikes!

<rant>
Don't fucking tell me to move business logic from the service to the controller. Don't fucking tell me it will enable an "event driven architecture." Don't fucking use Angular for this project if you're just gonna shit on best practices and write convoluted, messy, inconsistent code and force your coworkers to do the same!
</rant>

An experience that made me doubt (some) skills was when I tried for 3 days straight to find a way to share data over a win32 message. The event worked flawlessly, but the data payload always cointained random bytes.
A few weeks later I found an article about MemoryMappedFiles, which helped me solve it within half an hour.

So today I was booked as speaker for an event and I thought it was tomorrow. When they called me to ask me where I am it was too late since I need three hours to to arrive there. The stupidest mistake I made for decades.

Understanding JavaScript - Event loop, message queue and job queue

Hello devRant!
I'm at Code Europe (Krakow, Poland)
Any devranters here? :D

Let your programming do all the work during a CTF event :p

I hate being forced to go to an event you want 0 part in

a) when i wanted to write a twitter client for the console
b) when i automated my job that i had at a school event
just the ability to do such stuff is very exciting to me.

Just came back from a Dev event and it was so refreshing knowing that I have similar knowledge as some presenters and that almost anybody knows wtf they are doing 😂😂

It’s pretty awesome to hear that computer science played a big part in yesterday’s Event Horizon blackhole image.

Hello from the Ryerson FRC event

Extensible event system design in c++ - but also includes built-in static types for uniformity and performance.

Happy with it!

Didn’t want people staring at a random coding problem so I converted the board to something relevant to the event hehe

Went to a GDD Extended event for the first time. All they told was
repeat
{
bla bla bla
Google
bla bla bla
}

Looking forward to the postmortem on this event...

Google Calendar: Oh hey, your event has been updated!

Me: Oh great...who rescheduled?

[Nothing's changed in the event]

I love swag, got into a local virtual event, they ship you the full kit to make an audrino powered self watering plant…

Bag included a build it yourself Pandalf

One day i started to code.

One day i was told you will not code without git.

Many days i lost code on git because i was ignorant.

Today i reset the act of commiting without losing all my shit.

Git reset --soft HEAD^

I didnt event sweat it ;)

Today i feel like half a boss!!!

Event Head: There is a theme available to save you some time.

*Sends over a Wordpress theme*

EH: I got us this new service where you can create a website just by drag and drop.

Sure, why not. How foolish of me to not know of WordPress and Website builder tools.

Big event today! I will be publicly previewing a project we’ve been working on for almost a year now for the first time.
I wonder what they’ll think.

Google Cloud onboarding conference here in Cape Town today! Supposedly the largest attendance of the event globally so far. Over 600 developers here! Also the first one in Africa.

Apple event was so underwhelming after seeing new MS products. I don't buy into that Touch Bar hype.

Still I'm gonna go for MB Pro w/o Touch Bar. It will be my new PC

Making a generic class for event management

Welcome to the par<T>

All your disk are belong to us!

I bet after Apples event Steve jobs and Alan Turing are rolling in their graves.

Looks like everyone are excited for the eclipse and I am here waiting for the Android O event!

Added a Facebook Pixel to company website for marketer. Marketer calls back saying the pixel conversion event isn't working. Spend at least 20 minutes trying to figure out what went wrong. Try a bunch of changes nothing works. Facebook marketer Oh I forgot to turn on the event on my side. Fml

If you are sad about not getting into Google I/O, just know that people AT the event also have to livestream sessions because there's no room in the venues.

It sucks.

I've just visited F8 event by local Facebook Developer Circle, and I got this from there, actually love this t-shirt and had a great time with other developers. Waiting for I/O and Next extended event by Google Developer groups

Built a beautiful new fancy html5 page for a big event.
PM still wants to use the old flash video player.

Why the fuck ? Just no ...

@ Oracle code event, Bangalore. Anyone here?

A recruiter came to my school last month to (supposedly) tell us what are the hottest skills to have under our belts. The event ended up like a devRant IRL.

I wish all you frontend devs who use the keydown event to hack tab-order a very painful and very quick death.
Especially those who fail to ensure that TAB; Shift+TAB is always identity.

Thanks, client, for not telling me you were going to have a big sales event that needed my intervention. Nice Saturday I'm having.

Game development is a nightmare when your first starting out because you tend to neglect on keeping a small book on event notes.

Such as which event triggers what, and what events to turn off when the player starts the game.

You tend to get events that either don't start when player is far into game because you forgot to turn the event trigger on for something much for earlier in the game.

Live and Learn

Any devranters at the Toronto Microsoft devTour today? I'm but a lonely Linux user here xP

Today, I made an event-based gamepad library.

Although, I was lazy. I am planning on only supporting one controller so the library only supports one controller at a time. Plus, it uses some global variables.

But still, kinda fun

Made an app for college tech fest. Used devRant profile image as one of the event.

PC crashed while in the middle of a build, "ok, shit happens". Reboot, pc is super sluggy (a BSOD kinda does that, I guess). Reboot again and I check the event logs...I didn't find the problem, but at least my pc is sorry for whatever it was doing earlier.

People, even on devrant, are complaining about having to change their Twitter passwords. A major security event is not the only occasion to change your password (for anything).

You should change your passwords for everything regularly. Like, once every month or two.

This is why password managers are brilliant.

To be honest I forgot completely about the ducks and was kind of disappointed to see them, don't understand me wrong, its a great addition to the shop (especially to support devrant more when buying them and I will probably do too) and trogus (wow it's pronounced t-rogus) deserves a lot of respect for going through the very hard process of developing it, getting somebody to do a decent quality result etc. but I was hoping for the new site that got hyped up some time ago or some update to the app that fixes design issues on phones that have 2k resolution and no statusbar and more. ("just open a github issue" - I don't have one right now and it didn't get much attention anyway, since I am in the niche of people with those kind of setups, most people it seems have phones that can even barely run the app lol). The login still pops up each time you visit the site (basically just click it away, but it's rather annoying to have it pop up), it's nowhere near to the original app (although the native app is written in some sort of wrapper anyway?) - especially what comes to options, customizing, deactivating things, posting into categories (newest feature), getting notifications etc

There is some community builds that try to recreate a better desktop experience, but sadly fail to do so (sorry to devrantron and others, but what the fuck were you thinking when you rounded only the top right and left corner?) - since they always have something that is just thrown out to "be there" or design fails (which devrant just lacks and looks good across the board), that makes me rather cautious if that program doesn't send my credentials to some african prince. ("just look at the sourcecode", yes I have better things to do, thanks)

I could just create my own build, having to reverse engineer the whole website and app (granted, most of it are just api calls), but I simply lack the time (so I understand why my mentioned problems aren't getting really any attention or can't be implemented that fast, yet still its somewhat bugging)

I have listened to the Q&A and I know you guys are working full time at for example adobe (amazing that you both have time to be putting it towards devrant), so its not as much of a rant, just wanted to get out my disappointment about the event I felt personally. Still nice to have seen you and talk with the community a bit (although the time I feel was picked more towards your US audience rather than EU?).

I was recently asked to do tech support for an event being designed by webdesign and business students

All they asked me to do was generate a qr-code to their site. -_- took 10 seconds on a website. I even matched their color theme

Yet their rsvp system is to email an event account and they count the number of emails. Why wasn't I asked if I could set up a better system rather than a simple qr. I just learned about this and it's too close to the event to setup a better system and pitch it to them

*Stack Overflow* : Only 1 question to unlock the Curious badge.
*Also StackOverflow*

So I took a leave on 3/16 to attend an event.

I declared it in early February.

It was accepted and validated today, 3/23. Nice timing

Just came across a site with TERRIBLE CSS and some sort of event handling to block the user from accessing the dev tools.
So in my Chrome, no F12 and no Ctrl+Shift+I.

Well, guess what. The Tools menu in the title bar also contains a link to Developer Tools.

Me: 1 Them: 0

Why are some people incapable of reading documentation? THE "DUPLICATE RECORDS" IN OUR KAFKA TOPIC ARE BECAUSE ITS AN EVENT STREAM AND NOT A DATABASE. THIS IS LITERALLY ON THE FIRST PAGE OF THE GUIDE YOU ABSOLUTE MORONS.

Let me guess, using regexes in the mousemove event handler isn't a great idea.
How fast are simple regexes, anyway?
I have /^(\d+)(.*)$/, because I want to animate a css property that might have some unit.

So I’m like 90% certain 10% of my app should be event sourced, and the other 90% CRUD based (but event driven).

However after trying to tackle this from a variety of angles I’m 100% ready to jump off a building

So I’m taking a break and eating a fucking donut

I am working on the backend of the event website and my PM expects me to also design logo for different sub-events.

Apprantly it's part of my job.

Awesome

Twas the night before deadline,
And all through my house,
tons of bugs were scurrying from the
onClick event of the mouse.

Seriously though... Dreamweaver CC needs to revamp the way they implement bootstrap snippets. Specifically the navbar hover and click on <ul> dropdown menus.

Small rant. Why does clicking create a new event in Google calendars???? I am just trying to make it the active window, now I have to actually touch the keyboard to stop the madness!!

mom: son you received a package
me: wow 😍 (expecting stressball)
mom: oh nice, it is great
me: wow (so fast international delivery)
mom: it an invitation to a state level event organised by state government
me: yeah, mom i applied for it.
stress over stressball

Watch out for that Event Horizon

When the best event of the day is a business phonecall and you are a developer.

Customer actually gets what we do, is excited about it and is willing to put in some effort.

Google's hardware mega event tomorrow. So excited!

So what if I'm broke, I'll clap my hands instead! 😂

Debugging event driven code is "fun"

Trying to make an event calendar in javascript--too busy laughing and scrolling here. Maybe I'll stay up until 4 to compensate

Went to an "Hour of code" event with my dev friends and learned how to do the snake game in javascript.

Had to create an App in unstable Phonegap (2012) for all 4 platforms,
for our biggest Dubai based client for a Tech Event, within A WEEK :/

Forget Phonegap, I didn't even know JavaScript back then :|

That was the shittiest App I have ever created, still somehow got an appreciation mail :|

That moment when your task is to refactor a Web site and you discover that every element is positioned absolute and all responsiveness is done by callbacks attached to window resize event

Saw my previous dev professor in an event, almost 5+ yrs have passed since I last saw her.
We were tied to a team and when she asked me what skills can I contribute I said Web Dev, I swear her face turned sour with disappointment. What's so wrong ?

Assuming I have the following:

<li>
<a href= "address" class="hovermod">
Text here
<i class="fa fa-sign-out-alt" aria-hidden="true"></I>
</a>
</i>

How can I apply the hover event to the i element when the user hovers over the a element? The only success I have had thus far is when the user hovers specifically over the i element.

!dev

Last night I had a meeting at 7:30 and a social event at 6. I was just gonna skip the social event but my friends convince me to go. And it was alright.

I go to the meeting and one of the people that we absolutely need canceled but didn't tell us.

mfw I left a social event 30mins away to go to a meeting that was canceled.

Oh and the person that didn't show was my friend and they wanted to reschedule for this morning. Guess what I'm mad and hurt and just gonna be sad in my bed all day. Fuck your meeting.

!rant

When after one month of the event, a month n a half of the request, and a failed delivery attempt, the swag finally arrives!!

Stickers!! <3

Happy scenes!

Thank you Mozilla!!

Structure of every tech vendor's annual conference 😂

So, I was at a ux related event yesterday and I saw a company that 3d prints lollipops from 3d models you submit, it also has Search for models feature
I searched for "Trump" and Lord behold: almost all of them were orange flavoured by default but everything else was cherry flavoured
I love those devs

Tired of chasing an elusive architecture and finding good community that helps promote it. Basically:

- Not CRUD
- Not MVC
- More like CQRS; commands and queries represent use cases
- Event Sourced; event log is source of truth, everything else is a cached projection
- Functional Domain Design; not DDD; focus on immutability and simplicity
- Functional in general; less OO
- More focus on domain concepts rather than tech concepts
- Domain can be used through CLI, API, or SDK
- UI is just another client to the API
- Authorization is ABAC, graph-based access control

I'm looking for a fucking unicorn.

So I'm at this gaming event to enter in a small game I have been working on with fellow teammates. As an OOP, does anyone find the following conversation hmmm, odd?

Guy: I program for Microsoft!
Me: That's great! What's your favorite syntax?
Guy: I don't want to get into that? Me(inMyHead): 🙄😂😂😂👍🏾

Dear digital ocean, don't sponsor an event and have the entire development challenge on digital ocean if your website won't accept my and 40 other contestants' cards.

Who The fuck created Javafx it too damn dumb and stupid there's hundreds of lignes of code to wrote to do a simple event on a table cell 😑😑😑😑😑😡😡😡
I miss Swift 😭😭😭

I feel like writing or telling people about the time I jumped from Windows 7 Ultimate and jumping to Windows 10. (I'm not against 10, but I'm never updating after what had happened to me)
It all starts when none of my games will play due to a possible issue with my graphics card. I look up "3D source game bug" and not many results pop up. I go on Microsoft's Qna areas and ask this question but to my surprise nothing they say would make sense. "Clean the pins of your graphics card, make sure you verify the games on Steam". I verified the games and they checked out as perfectly fine. I don't have access to my graphics card because this is a laptop, sadly not a tower.
Two months pass and my computer is already showing signs of stress, like it didn't want to live in a sense. It was three times slower than when I was on Windows 7 and it was unallocating areas of my main hard drive where I could make virtual hard drives.
Instantly I start looking up Linux distros and find Linux Mint. 17.3 was the current version at the time. I downloaded it and burned it onto a DVD-rom and rebooted my computer. I loaded into the disc and to my surprise it seemed almost like Windows 7 apart from the Linux part. I grab my external hard drive and partition it to hold the Linux distro and leave it plugged in incase Windows 10 does actually fail.
On December 19, a few months after Windows 10 had released. I start my laptop to try and continue my studies in video game development. But to my surprise, Windows 10 had finally crashed permanently. The screen flickered blue and black, and an error box saying Loginui.exe failed to start. I look at it for a solid minute as my computer had just committed suicide in a sense.
I reboot thinking it would fix the error but it didn't. I couldn't log in anymore.
I force shutdown the laptop and turn it back on putting it into safe mode.
To my surprise loginui.exe works and I sign in. I look at my desktop, the space wallpaper I always admired, the sound files, screen shots I had saved.
I go into file explorer and grab everything out of my default hard drive Windows was installed on. Nothing but 400gb got left behind and that was mainly garbage prototypes I had made and Windows itself. I formatted my external hard drive and placed everything on it. Escaping Windows 10 with around 100GB of useful data I looked at the final shutdown button I would look at.
I click it and try to boot into normal Windows 10. But it doesn't work. It flickers and the error pops up once more.
I force it to shutdown and insert the previous Linux Mint disc I made and format the default hard drive through Linux. I was done. 10 gave me a lot of shit. Java wouldn't work, my games has a functional UI but no screen popped up except a black abyss and it wouldn't even let me try to update my graphics card, apparently my AMD Radeon 5450 was up to date at the AMD Radeon 5000's.
I installed Linux Mint and thinking the games would actually play I open steam and Launch Half-Life 2 to check if Linux would be nicer to me than Windows 10 had been.
To my surprise the game ran. The scene from Highway 17 popped on screen and the UI was fully functional. But it was playing at 10-15fps rather than the usual 60-70fps. Keep look at my drivers and see my graphics card isn't in use. I do some research and it turns out I have a Hybrid Laptop.
Intel HD Graphics and an AMD Radeon 5450 and it was using the Intel and not the AMD. Months of testing and attempts of getting the games to work at high frame rates pass and the Damn thing still functions at a low terrible fps. Finally I give up. I ask my mom for a Windows 7 disc and she says we can't afford it. A few months pass and I finally get a Windows 7 installation disc through money I've saved up. Proudly I put it into my optical disc drive and install it to my main hard drive deleting Linux completely. I announced to all my friends my computer was back in working order and I install everything I needed, Steam, Skype, Blender, and Unity as well as all my games. I test Half-Life 2 and it's running exceptionally smoothly, I test Minecraft at max settings and it's working beautifully. The computer was functioning properly once again and my life as a developer started as I modeled things and blender, learned beginners C# and learned a lot of Batch. Today the computer still runs at a great speed and I warn others of what happened to me after I installed Windows 10 to my machine if they are thinking of switching from 7 or 8 on an older machine.
Truly the damage to my data cannot be undone. But the memory of the maintenance, work, tests, all are a memory of how Windows 10 ruined me and every night before the one year anniversary of Windows 10's release, I took out the battery of my laptop and unplugged it from the a.c. power, just so Windows 10 doesn't show it's DLLs, batch scripts, vbs scripts, anything on my computer. But now, after this has happened and I have recovered, I now only have a story to tell

Come to a weekly deep learning meet up this morning 8.30AM. The event start at 10 AM.  While waiting I read news and play some game. As time near 10 o'clock I had strange feeling: The guest room so quiet, just me and 2 security guy.

Okay I think comittee that run this event a bit late because of traffc jam and I wait more. In the end the committee didn’t even show until 10.30AM. Later I found on another data science group today's event is postponed and I go home.

WHY DIDNT YOU GUYS MAKE ANNOUNCEMENT ON SLACK? YOU WASTE MY TIME WAITING 2 HOURS

When i was in a student project, a guy wrote the whole e-mail validation in js from scratch,using only the key down event. We all wers like: "Wtf dude, yu no Google? "

sport event bookingapp for android, ios and blackberry. 3 weeks. we finished. client wasnt happy with the colors and sued us and we won. I left the company because of that bs deadlines.

Is there a way to make the ( + ) Floating Action Button disappear down and reappear up on scroll event, like it does on all the Google apps with Material Design?

Saw a boss scratch an employee's car and was later caught by the security cam but what will the employee do?
A. Resign and lose his job
B. Keep his job and ignore the event
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Null: sue for mental and physiological stress; go on vac.

Fucking Chrome. I wish him cancer to die soon. Yeah, please fucking give me as event target svg element! Well done!

my work computer is acting funny, so i look at the windows event logs to see...

ya mcafee is owning itself...awesome, great, grand

I just came home from opening of the fiscal year of a small drivers' club and it was quite an amazing life experience.

I got about a 5-times "rise" for a first, small, post-due-time project.

All of the members were so relaxed in one of the most serious moments of an association. We ate, drank beer and had as much fun as possible without break the law and other rules.

The story goes like this:

I was an intern in a website development company as students tend to do. In middle of the internship my teacher asked me if I'd be willing to develop a website to the before mentioned organization.
School will help with the money by being as a middle-man. It wasn't going to pay much, about 120€ or so, it's nothing really for the job, but I said yes for the experience. We organized a meeting, school provided the space, and went straight to the business.

The development went quite well: I got the final design requirements late (there weren't too much), research a lot about CMS:s, ended up with a beta version CMS (a risk), learned it, developed some plugins (not published yet), kept copyrights for most of the work and so on.

I was done _relatively_ quickly with the project and was quite happy with it. Only things still pressing my mind was bugs of the beta CMS, support for the plugins and my somewhat inexperienced graphical design.

Then it hit me, the world. Hosting, domain transfer, certificates, registry agreements. Arrgh. Most of things were fine, I know them. I had luck that I had a technical contact for the club. It would have been a nightmare of it's own otherwise.

We had problems transferring the domain, again, as you do. The other hosting company was to blame. They were the n00bs here. I went trough the law, technical guidance, etc. I was having heavy messaging with my technical contact about it, who was a middle-man for me and the hosting firms.
After a long while loop of waiting, reconfiguring, researching and messaging, until he transfer was finally over.

We had a long while of radio silence after some bug fixes. Until the Christmas came and I was invited to a Christmas party in a cottage, third Christmas party that year. It was great fun. We ate, drank, talked, went to sauna and had a playful adult stiga or sledging competition, etc.
I updated the site yet again, a stable version of the CMS were published. Yess!

Another radio silence came and year changed. It was broken off by a call to the opening of the fiscal year, the same day. This is today, or yesterday by now. This was just after my current company's board game night. I was really busy that day. A whole afternoon of second-hand shopping around the city with a bike. I counted 35 kilometers. Yes I go by bike, don't own a car or have an driving license... Yet.

I wasn't horribly late, around 30 minutes. I started eating and drinking. Free food and beer! They was also late, they should've got trough the business before I got there, before eating. So I ate and listened. Learned more about having business or an association in general. Until my matter came to be heard. They thanked me of the co-operation and made public the change of my reward sum, I WAS GRANTED 500€ REWARD for the work. It's still not an amazing sum in a larger point of view, but I can imagine that it's big deal for a small non-profit organization, which was loosing money. Everybody applauded, every 25 members of the club. I was greatly pleased. I will have to update their site a bit still, but they are going to pay the reward ASAP.

Did I mention that the school works around the taxes, legally. Taxes for the reward, if it were assumed as a wage would be 15%, for me, at the worst case scenario, only for getting the money to my hands.

I was offered another gig at the event, but didn't promise anything yet. I left before sauna, so we didn't get to change contact details. He will find a way to reach me if he really wants so. I'm a busy free man.

Is everyone excited about Wednesday US and Thursday in many countries devRant livestream event? I know I am. I am counting the hours 😊 Is everyone attending this devRant global event?

I just broke a magento store by registering a resize event on the window with jquery.

Wtf

Might as well start off with the weekly event!
My favourite famous programmer I reckon is Sir Tim Berners-Lee, because without the work of him and his colleagues at CERN, we'd probably be struggling to talk about our favourite programmers with other people around the world - we might even still be dialing into Minitel and BBSes

I read this post somewhere where this son of a bitch created 4 5 accounts, then submitted fake PRs across those accounts to each other during Hacktoberfest.
People like these are fucking losers absolutely destroying the credibility of a event like Hacktoberfest.
People like them would sell of their own fucking soul for a T shirt

Do you agree?

Being a Dutch developer & student I'd love to seek new challenges and participate in coding events and Hackathons. Seeing as Devrant has so many amazing developers from The Netherlands around, any suggestions where I could go and find information about such events?

!rant
Any Dragonball fans out there? I'm contemplating attending one of those "Scream like Goku" events that are happening in the cities :D

node.selected = false //Node becomes selected

Why? It is a valid question so I was trying to resolve a bug in one of our components that uses a TreeList of DevExpress and on the event AfterNodeFocus we raise an event to update the current object selection by putting the node selection to true and updating other values as well.

Well it seems that every thing is OK so why the fuck is this thing not working????

After 30 minutes into the problem realized that the event SelectionChanged is raise in the end of the AfterNodeFocus. Then realized that the event was running twice. One when I was setting the node.selection = true and after the event AfterNodeFocus but the list of selections were different. So what I discovered is the event SelectionChanged raised after AfterNodeFocus is using node.selection = !node.selection.

So how do I fixed it?

Before finishing AfterNodeFocus I set the selection of the node to false and voila the selection of items works now.

Well after 5 hours into the problem lets try another thing.

During the company's Xmas event, we were off-site at a place that does events to do a team-building event followed by dinner party.

An error report came up, it wasn't a showstopper, but it was fairly serious, and the perfect excuse to sit out the BS improv team-building exercises that the powers that be thought would be a good idea to have.

Probably my favorite bug ever.

ibm think starts in 3 minutes, it’s buffering....

I see IBM is promoting their cloud a lot now.

My manager just told me this at the end of the work day.

Today, my manager got a call from client "X".

They wanted to know why issue "Y" happened at event "Z" that was being put on for their client.

My manager basically told them we had nothing to do with that part of the event, so we wouldn't have had anything to do with solving problem "Y" either, but that what ended up causing problem "Y" had been passively mentioned to us months ago, and that he's not sure why their client didn't communicate it.

Client "X" told my manager that they would call back after talking to their person that helped organize event "Z".

No call back.

Definitely rant-ish, but also kind of a funny/ridiculous story to end the work day with.

A meeting with an external event organizer, who just so happened be a rather attractive woman. I've never had so many superfluous colleagues (all guys) show up and show off.
That meeting went long.

Are the Verge live blogs always this weird?

Was watching the Google live event. Must confess that I'm highly disappointed with the looks of the Pixel 2 . I guess 2017 is just not the year for Google! I mean I love the software improvements but let's admit it that inspite of us being software devs , we ourselves love good design! The pixel 2 just does not make the cut according to me. It looks like a brick. Google does need some hardware devs!

The service hooks at Visual Studio Team Service are a mess. A new subscription for every single event. Really?
Is it that hard to add an "everything" field? Instead I can now add 25 events one by one - for every project.

The BIOS on my PC got cleared during a power event. Now I get a 99 when I reboot.

Wonder how many hours I'm going to lose troubleshooting this?

Something about MVC. If one clicks on the UI to open a menu, is the event sent to the controller which updates the view or does the view "just display the menu"?

Working with technologies that excite me, which at the moment would be functional programming, CQRS, Event Sourcing, and the actor model, with a side of machine learning and serverless architectures. At a company that is large enough to pay well and grow in, but small enough that my contributions are recognized and appreciated. Or even better, one that I own and run.

My most disliked part about my job is one recurring event that happens way too often: waiting for other teams to do their fucking jobs so that I can do mine.

There was a big concert event after work last night I couldn't go.
Noone is at work but me today....
and there is a ton of empty bottles in the cantina as well as quite some mess in a meeting room.
And noone has said they were taking the day off. oh well I'm going early then.

So apple event today was 2 hours long to say....

MOAR screen for MOAR dollar?! 💵💵😂

The only feature I want is the fall detection for when I face-palm now....

Tech event in Prague next week.... Chance to geek out by day and by night for a few days.... Question is... Should I enter the hackathon or just take it easy?

What if a programmer was invited to the dear moon project? What would he make?

Probably a new JS framework or a new programming language? :P

That spacex event was one of the most inspiring event I have seen in a long while. I can't believe it is happening. That Q&A was very interesting and I like how Elon Musk talks, he tries really good to put things in layman terms.

And looks like Elon Musk is also going to space with Yazuka.

If I get a chance to go in lunar trip, I would be happy even if things go wrong and I have to die in space.

So many years ago while I was in college learning to code and interning as a developer working on a javascript based image designer. We were learning event handlers in class and I was learning how to work with jQuery.

So I decided to build an event handlers to move objects by key press. I had an afternoon free and dont remember merging it to the codebase.

A few months later, something was pushed that took key press the event handler and the testers complained about losing the event handler I made.

End of the story, I added a feature that is still being used because I wanted to learn how to do something.

Today on fucked up Javascript stuff: Call stacks whose bottom isn't an entry point or event handler

Can we take a moment to recognize how absolutely retarded JS' event system is?
Events aren't objects. No, they're managed by an object, and identified by a string.
To subscribe to an event, you call object.addEventListener(name, callback). Because for some reason we can't just have an event object. Events MUST have an owner.
But to unsubscribe you don't call the function addEventListener returned, you don't use the token it returned either. No, you pass the same function to removeEventListener.
Because we don't use serializable tokens like in PP, and we don't return functions like in FP, no, we use functions as tokens, realising idiomatic DFP.

How many of you watched Google's live event? What are your opinions on the new Google pixel 2? Honestly I was kinda disappointed.

Every team building event, the company run a random draw to organise the teams.
It looks like the random equations not applicable to the beauty lady and the rich guy, they always match together.
What a draw...
Should I give them actual simple running draw app! Or they may hate me :)

How can we break a loop which is on other class by just button press event in Java?

I'm in the top 10 contributors in FOSSASIA's coding event CodeHeat, will be attending FOSSASIA's Summit in Singapore between 17th-19th March !!!

!rant
Any UK peeps going i59 fancy a meetup? devRant community appreciation event ftw!

When you spend so much time at an event you start to get anxiety near the end of it because you have no idea how many unread emails you have waiting for you.

Two co-workers came late to our team-event because the POI on GMaps wasn't set accurately to the parking lot of the location.
We became dependent...