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Search - "umm.. okay..?"
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*computer fell, broken in pieces*
Me calling [Microsoft] tech support: hey can you check my warranty on this computer, I think I broke it?
Tech support: yes sir but we must first go through the troubleshooting steps,
Me: no, no I just-
Tech support: have you tried pressing F8 sir?
Me: umm… no, look I'm just -
Tech support: sir please press the F8 key sir
Me: okay… I pressed it, now can you just check my-
Tech support: sir please what happened when you pressed F8?
Me: it's broken, now if you could just check my warranty -
Tech support: sir I'm sorry sir I think you did it wrong. Please press F8
Me: no just check my-
Tech support: sir I think you do not understand, sir it is at the top-
Yup.14 -
Dev: Hey, do we have a Google cloud machine running?
Me: No we have AWS remember?
Dev: Okay..
Me: Why do you want a gCloud?
Dev: I had this large stack of files and want to put them somewhere, off of my laptop. I just feel comfortable using Google than AWS.
Me: Umm.. there is Dropbox for that sort of stuff. Not high performance servers running our services.
Dev: ...
Dev: (After a moment) Yeah, why didn't I think of that? :/
Me: Seriously???
I think he forgot to have breakfast today.18 -
Met a girl on internet ( because I don't have a real life )
She: So what are you studying?
Me: Currently learning about Deep Learning but I also do freelancing in website development to pay my bills.
She: Okay so tell me what is a COMPUTER
Me: ....
She: ......
Me: umm... it's a... mmm.... actually it's a..... basically a.....
(thinking really hard)
*30 seconds later*
Me: It's an electronic machine
She: seriously? I expected much better from you
Me: I'm sorry!27 -
An interview scene today:
Me (interviewer): Ok so tell me this.
Candidate: Umm, aaaa, blaa blaa blaa blaa, this and that.
Me: But I didn't ask you this.
Candidate: I don't know the answer to that but I know blaa blaa blaa blaa, this and that.
Me: It's okay if you don't know the answer to my questions, we will skip to the next question.
Candidate: Ok.
Me: Asks how "X" works and why should we use.
Candidate: Umm, aaaa, "X is a .." blaa blaa blaa blaa, this and that.
Me: Okay, I already know what "X" is, please tell me how it works and why would you use that.
Candidate: Umm I don't know, but I know X is blaa blaa blaa blaa, this and that.13 -
IDK, there's something about PCB circuits with all the components on it... For some reason I find them very calming, I think they could even help me with my anger management and/or sleep problems (if I had any).
They are so nice and neat.. so strict and in order. Everything has its own place and its own path. Everything in there has its purpose. That's so nice :)
// triggered by https://twitter.com/iXsystems/...random just a tag that's weird how many tags can i assign? relax circuitry umm.. okay..? pcbgasm ocd maybe? wtv pcb order4 -
Microsoft.. MicrobrainedSoftware-devs.
SamsungCloud died out and was replaced with OneDrive automatically. Alright, my data is still backed up, so.. No biggie.
OneDrive was syncing my pics and videos automatically, even though media sync is disabled. Umm.. Okay?
My phone is constantly very low on free space [idk why], so I decided to clean up some old photos. I'm removing and removing, until I reach photos with a cloud and an arrow replacing their content. Hundreds of spoiled pics that do not open. And in info their path is /OneDrive/*. Umm.. Wat?
Open mydrive website, log in only to be greeted by a fully loaded onedrive webapp covered by a non-removable modal 'we have an app for this. Use app'. Wtf?? Just let me disable the modal and use the webapp!! Wtf!
Open onedrive app. I'm greeted with a red warning that I've exceeded my storage limits and my account is frozen and my files will be deleted in June '23. WTF????? A heads-up would be nice!!
The popup lists my options:
1. Unfreeze the account for 30days, but I can only do that once. If after 30d I'm still exceeding my limits, my acc will be again frozen w/o an easy way to unfreeze.
2. Once unfrozen [takes ~24hrs], I can either
2.1 pay 7€ to M$ monthly for 1TB of storage in onedrive
2.2 remove my files from OD and my phone [since even if media sync is disabled, OD app is still syncing my media]
what the actual fuck?!?!? M$ is now keeping hundreds of my photos on my phone hostage.
Go F* yourself!11 -
tl : "hey dotenv, we have a presentation with VP tomorrow, do you want to present any of your achievements in product?"
me: "umm, what achievements ?"
tl : "you know, something that you added in app which made a good impact to various metrics like DAU, MAU, less bad reviews etc"
me: "umm... i coded the tasks and features created by you folks. they got shipped at some point of your liking, and are now being tracked by you for its success failure. So i am not sure what to take credit for"
TL: "no, no.. i mean like any bugs or issues that you fixed outside of your daily jira tasks which you tracked to be a sucess"
me: "well as far as tracking is concerned, then neither i know how to track them nor i did. but yea, i identified a bug where an outdated payload was generating bad request and giving a silent failure instead of success which recently got shipped. maybe its helping users get actual response instead of "we will get back to you in some time" , so this might get considered?
TL : "oh that? that we have already added as one of the team's achievements (=PM+TL's achievement) and have tracked it to be a succes"
me : "what th- okay. then how about that api failure which was identified by AVP as "something is not right" in which the api was intermittently taking a long time to respond. he tagged me and i set up logs to identify which type of users got that issue and the actual cause of that api failure. that was definitely a good fox for app as we ended up with good reviews on playstore for our new release?"
TL : "oh that? how can you take credit for that fix? it was identified by AVP, you just added similar logs that we were using for tracking errors and implemented a fix when it came to you as a sprint task? its a team achievement"
me : "but you guys didn't identified the cause through your logs!? my log was more granular. and even if that's the case, we aren't allowed to pick any task just as is, without getting it added to sprint , right?"
TL : "nah, that was a team win"
*6 months later, during appraisal time"
TL : "Hey dotenv, you haven't displayed any leadership skills and haven't gone put of the box to improve the product. Here's your peanut appraisal 🗑️"
me : 🥲🔫🤯🪦
------------
fuck this stupid neaurocrst structure. i hate being a selfish prick than a team player, but either give credits as well as punishment to the team or gove credits as well as punishment to the single person. but wtf is thos culture of giving reward to team and punishment to individual? fckin communists
------ -
Central team: No, your team must be doing something wrong. Our pipeline is super-configurable and works for any situation! You just have to read the docs!
Me: Where are the docs?
Central team: Uhh, well, umm... we'll hook you up with a CI/CD coach!
Me: Okay, cool. In the mean time, can you point me at the repo where all the base scripts are?
Central team: Sure, it's here.
Me, some weeks later: Yeah, uhh, the coach can't seem to figure out how to make our Prod deployment work either.
Central team: That's impossible! It's so easy and completely configurable!
Me: Well, okay... but, here's the thing: your pipeline IS pretty "configurable", in the sense that you look for A LOT of variables...
Central team: See! We told you!
Me: ...none of which are actually documented, so they're just about useless to me...
Central team: But, but the coach...
Me: ...couldn't make heads or taisl of it either despite him literally being ON YOUR TEAM...
Central team: Then your project must just be architected wrong!
Me: Well, we're not perfect, so could be...
Central team: Right!
Me: ...but I think it's far more likely that the scripts... you know, the ACTUAL Python scripts the pipeline executes... while it took me DAYS to get through all your levels of abstraction and indirection and, well, BULLSHIT... it turns out they are incredibly NOT flexible. They do one thing, all the time, basically disregarding any flexibility in the pipeline. So, yeah, I'm thinking this is probably one of this "it's you, not me" deals.
Central team: Waaaaahhhhhhhh!!!!!!2 -
I was suggested as a kid to “avoid using too much “uh”s and “umm”s while speaking, especially if giving a speech. It sounds bad.” And I agree.
But now, I see, that people generally don’t fucking care about how they speak. Almost every video on the internet (especially the teaching videos) is full of bloody “uh”s and “umm”s.
It’s okay once or twice, if someone genuinely forgets about something. But why the fuck is it becoming part of people’s way of speaking?
Ruins the whole experience of a video. Even if the video’s contents are actually good.
Pause if you want to, but stop the fucking moaning!7 -
Me: Let's implement this integration test suite in Python since it has got plenty of rich libraries for accomplishing our goals.
Client: Let's use Node.js instead.
Me: With Node.js, we'll need to handle a lot of it's inherent stuff like asynchronous code flows, promises, etc. That's not what we primarily want to achieve.
Client: Let's use Node.js.
Me: Okay. What potential advantages do you see with Node.js?
Client: Umm.. let's just use Node.js?
Me: FML4 -
So in my school, all classes now have a laptop. Our laptop's touchpad just suddenly stopped working on Monday, but oddly enough, only in Windows. Rebooting the laptop or shutting it down didn't help. Now, on Wednesday, it magically started working again.
Umm okay thanks for working again I guess5 -
So... umm...
Just remembered my Informatics teacher left me and my friend a side project to do by the end of summer:
The task is to replicate the game "Minesweeper" in a C# form.
Now, I never actually even understood that game when I played it, how the hell can I program that? ;-;
Well okay, yeah, I might have to actually start looking into it... but freak, it's almost the end of summer already, and I'm still on vacation... my fault I guess. ;—;7 -
Convo with me an my friend today (i purposefully left out my opinions and reactions):
Friend: i want to learn c#
Me: sounds good, but I'd go java if i were you
F: yeah but i want to do unity
M: sounds good, but I'd go with unreal engine if I were you
F: what language is unreal engine?
M: C++, but if you want to make apps, go with unity
F: yeah I want to make an android app
M: sounds good, but I'd try out renderscript if I were you
F: yeah I've used that before
M: oh really? What does it do?
F: I don't know
M: its for gpgpu because android game devs needed better performance
F: yeah I've used that
M: what does gpgpu stand for?
F: umm… i know what gpu stands for
M: okay dude, you didn't use it
F: yes I did, I made a cypher
M: dude, you didn't use it
F: yes I did!
M: what does gpgpu stand for?
F: *left*
*five minutes later*
M: *checks phone*
M: *sees text from friend*
Text from friend: dude it was general purpose gpu1 -
## building my own router
I hoped things would go more smoothly :)
Anyway, my new miniPC easily accepted CentOS 8 - no fuss here. And I've got to say - I love CentOS8 so far! Shell has amazing nifty tricks, UI (gnome3) is also snappy, video/audio/ethernet,.. everything works.
What I did NOT expect is hardware being off. Well okay, the price was low - it was obvious smth is not right. But still.. I decided to build my own router so that I could swap wifi card whenever I want. So that I could run my own network services in there. Turns out - the card swapping is not as easy as one might think.
I got the AX200 WiFi6 card for that very purpose. But once plugged in the OS can only see it's bluetooth module. Weird... What's even weirder is that even though the card is PCIe, the OS uses btusb module to talk to that device. What? USB?? emm.. What??
And there it is. After opening it up again I noticed that the mPCIe area is marked with a label: "USB WIFI / WWAN". USB? Does that mean this PCIe slot is wired into the USB bus? Not impossible I guess.
Googling for a "pcie wifi over usb" or smth like that brought me to one reddit (I think?) where someone wanted to build a DIY wifi mPCIe -> USB adapter and someone else adviced hime that (for some reason) at best he could only get bluetooth working (hey! just like me!). It's got to do smth with pcie channels and USB being too weak to handle all that load, or smth.. IDK, I'm not a HW guy.
Well that sucks then! I have a mPCIe slot that does not work as a PCIe. Shit! So I guess the best I could do is to plug back in the same wifi card that came with the device. It smells like 2003 - supports only g protocol. Fine, let's try that. Maybe I'll find a way to work around this mPCIe limitation later on (USB adapter or smth... except there are no USB WIFI6 dongles yet :( ). So I plug it back in and start turning it into a router. Disable NetworkManager, configure static NCs' settings, install dhcpd, hostapd, bind and others. Looks like all is done! Now it's time to start it all. systemctl start hostapd --> FAILED. wtf? journalctl says it could not initialize a driver. umm okay? Why? Forums say I should airodump-ng check and kill whatever's using that device. Fine. airodumo reveals avahi and wpa_suppl are still using it. kill, kill, GOTTA KILL 'EM ALL!! Starting hostapd again -- same shit... wtf?
iw list
My gawd... That shitty network card does not even support AP mode :( I mean.. My USB wifi dongle for 2€ supports 2x more modes, is faster, has better range and is easier to work with than this old tart!
Yeah. That was an interesting day. When enfironment engineers break my testing environments at work I'm glad I have where to spend my time now.
BTW any ideas how to bypass this mPCIe nonsense? Come on, there are USB GPUs out there.. Why can't they make a USB (or dual-USB if they really need to) mPCIe adapter?8 -
PM: have a look on this website and let me know if we can do this?
Me: Umm...the product is unfinished and it is built upon WordPress so it can be done...
PM:...
Me: Send credentials so that and requirements...
PM: 'Need to finish the website and fix errors'
Me : [that's really vague but okay] Okayyyyyyyy
Me: Send credentials
Me: Moral of the story is, do not approach me if you do not have complete details...please fuck off...
PM : we don't have it1 -
Dude how the hell are u even staying at home, I have been home for like a week now and IDK what to do, im bored as fuck.
Umm okay try writing my code in prolog, u would wish the inverse.6 -
!dev
There are no right answers in parenting, but there are sure as hell wrong ones and if the fucking backfire effect is too much to keep you from realizing that half of your stupid fucking decisions are delusional at best then you should probably start rethinking some things. I fucking hate dealing with other people fucking up and being stupid and I know I'm going to have to keep dealing with it in one form or another but god why I'm so done with this I just fucking don't want to deal with anyone anymore I don't want to deal with myself anymore
I dunno I don't have anyone to rant to so I can't like be specific here because it's public af but you know typing this makes me feel a little better but I still just don't want to deal with this shit anymore I don't even know what I do want to do there's like nothing the positive feedback is going away and I don't know what to fucking do with myself and I don't know how to change anything I can't fucking fix anything I mean I can fix my shitty code but I'm never getting anywhere with that and whenever I want to fix anything that's actually important I just fuck up regardless of how hard I try I just don't want to fucking try anymore I don't know if I'll actually hit post but I have to put this somewhere so probably but ugh I don't even fucking ugh literally all of my problems are so fucking dumb and small and elementary but I CAN'T FUCKING DO ANYTHING I keep ranting about these fucked up people I have to deal with and yeah they fucking suck and sometimes I wish they didn't exist but I know I'm just as if not more of an idiot and everyone would probably be better off if I didn't exist but wait no that would have happened but you guys don't get to know about that because it's specific and putting that here would fuck shit up but someone else could so that so much better and I don't know everyone who interacts with me is just hurting themselves like fuck why do some friends like blades better than me maybe because I'm even less caring and even more damaging than a stupid fucking inanimate sharp piece of metal god fucking ugh okay I can't focus on anything why is this even okay side rant why are atheists so fucking hated like yes maybe some can't understand their motives for like doing things but nobody can really understand each other's like religious people all use god or gods in their own way why do you have to think of people who have zero gods as opposed to your nonzero as less human than you there's so much wrong with that okay that side rant is over but this whole thing is a side rant so cool fuck my life lol uuh I don't know I don't want to stop typing I don't know why though I guess I just actually I have no fucking idea I'm just here doing this I should be like fucking asleep I'm passing the fuck out after this ugh okay okay okay okay okay okay okay umm I really want to quote a certain person that I really hate right now and dissect them and prove every single fucking stupid argument they make wrong but I feel like that would not be good since this is so public but I swear I hate this and you know what if you're thinking that yes I AM A FUCKING WHINY BITCH DEAL WITH IT I'M WHINING YOU DENSE FUCKER YOU DON'T HAVE TO POINT IT OUT AND FEEL SMUG IT'S BETTER TO VENT HERE THAN A LOT OF OTHER WAYS SO JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP OKAY ACTUALLY FUCK IT CALL ME OUT ON IT I NEED SOMETHING TO TAKE THIS OUT ON GOD AAAAAAH okay uuh yeah that's fun I'm a fuck up okay okay so you ask "how can you be a fuck up you're so young her der" okay being young generally is a disadvantage because you haven't had opportunity but boy have I and I sure fucked every single one of those up so yeah fun stuff you know woo haha mmkay I wish I had friends online this late because then I could like rant to a person and shit I mean this community is people but not people I know and it's not really back and forth as much and ugh okay right uuh yeah good um ugh I used to be able to get this shit out by doing something I'm good at but now I'm shit at everything and I can't motivate myself and it's all just bottled up and there's so much shit and nothing works and fuck there's probably a simple solution to everything I'm facing but I'm such a dense piece of shit that I can't find any of those stupid fucking ugh okay now I'm looking at my stupid hands typing ugh I hate the things right back up here uuh uuh I have 500 charas left lets fucking go I don't want to stop I mean I do want to stop but like by that I mean I just want to not exist I do want to keep typing here because it's the only thing distracting me but yeah uuh right um some people were like wtf happened with your stalking thing and this isn't where I should put it but fuck it whatever some weird guy just logged on for 10 mins to take a screenshot of the time being 2:22:22 and logged off and boom the school year ended uuh yeah kay right fuck I have to end it now
Aaaah okay uuh right bye I'm really sorry if you actually read that whole thing4 -
Okay, I will just send a fix version this week... Umm 2 crashes and a small UX improvement, should take 10 minutes...
Android Studio says something needs updating, well okay I have time...
*Codes the fixes*
*Tests the fixes*
WTF the backup functionality is broken.
*Debugs*
Silly Google drive lib, why don't you like when the user selects an account?
*Fires up another computer, doesn't let it update, compiles and it works!*
Fuck you google -
hr- "so why are looking to switch from X"
me- "well i currently work in b2b domain amd i really want to work on B2C product where millions of users are being impacted"
hr- "yeah we also have premium companies as users and b2b work is not much different than b2c. what else?"
me- "uh umm, also i saw the opening for a journalism company , so i was very tempted to apply as i always
wanted to work for jo-"
hr- "the opening is for p, a subdomain of our company which is a music player"
me- "umm that's okay. i guess i like listening to music as well 😅 . also i wanted to work nearby to my home"
hr- "yeah that's the real reason. your current company is asking you to come to their city"
me- "no they are still remote!" (they aren't)
hr- "i will connect you with another person. please be negotiable"
🥺😭 mann i am so much out of the game i am embarrassing myself over a phone call. can't even answer a stupid why question4