So my friend started a YouTube channel, being the motivational man I am I encouraged him and made him a logo for his channel.

It started here, he called me a bazillion times every single day asking me to make stuff like Channel banners, intros.

He even went so far to call my design bad and that I could do better.

I'm definitely losing my hold on my generosity, it's like this with every single fucktard I help. It's like programmers don't get to have a life, people pitch me stupid ideas at every party.. Having a casual conversation a guy starts talking about an idea.

Oooh... And the worst part they say you can have 60% and just give them 40% 'MINORITY' share for coming up with an idea I could pull up from my arse instantaneously

Next time he asks me something I'm gonna fuck him up or just charge him a bazillion dollars... FUCK FUCK FUCK... REALLY GOT TO BUY THAT STUPID STRESS CUBE

TLDR;
Wrote a slick scheduling and communication system allowing me to assign photography resources based on time and location.

I'll tell you a little secret ... I'm not actually a dev. I'm a photographer, pretending to be a dev.

Or ... perhaps it's the other way around? (I spend most of my time writing code these days, but only for me - I write the software I use to run my business).

I own a photography studio - we specialize in youth volleyball photography (mostly 12-18 year old girls with a bit of high school, college and semi-pro thrown in for good measure - it's a hugely popular sport) and travel all over the US (and sometimes Europe) photographing.

As a point of scale, this year we photographed a tournament in Denver that featured 100 volleyball courts (in one room!), playing at the same time.

I'm based in California and fly a crew of part-time staff around to these events, but my father and I drive our booth equipment wherever it needs to go. We usually setup a 30'x90' booth with local servers, download/processing/cashier computers and 45 laptops for viewing/ordering photographs. Not to mention 16' drape and banners, tons of samples, 55' TVs, etc. It's quite the production.

We photograph by paid signup only - when there are upwards of 800 teams/9,600 athletes per weekend playing, and you only have four trained photographers, you've got to manage your resources!

This of course means you have to have a system for taking sign those sign ups, assigning teams to photographers and doing so in the most efficient manner possible based on who is available when the team is playing. (You can waste an awful lot of time walking from one court to another in a large convention center - especially if you have to navigate through large crowds - not to mention exhausting yourself).

So this year I finally added a feature I've wanted for quite some time - an interactive court map. I can take an image of the court layout from the tournament and create an HTML version in our software. As I mouse over requests in one window, the corresponding court is highlighted on the map in another browser window. Each photographer has a color associated with them. When I assign requests to a photographer, the court is color coded with the color of the photographer. This allows me to group assignments to minimize photographer walk time and keep them in a specific area. It's also very easy to look at the map and see unassigned requests and look to see what photographer is nearby.

This year I also integrated with Twilio and setup a simple set of text shortcuts that photographers can use to let our booth staff know where they are, if they have memory cards that need picking up, if they need water/coffee/snack, etc. They can also move assignments on their schedule or send and SOS for help if it looks like they aren't going to be able to photograph a team.

Kind of a CLI via the phone. :)

The additions have turned out to be really useful and has made scheduling and managing the photographers much easier that it was in the past.

#wannaCry Ransomware:

US engineers trying to find antivirus

Europe engineers finding preventing tools

meanwhile...

Indian engineers already updated their resume with " Worked/Implemented fix for wannaCry ransomware"

Meanwhile...

Indian HR consultants asking for minimum 5 years experience in handling "wannacry"

And meanwhile....

in Hyderabad Ameerpet - people might be seeing banners of training institutes mentioning that they have trainers available with 10 years of industry experience on this.😜😜😝😝

If you wanna replace few of the carousel banners in your website, at least fucking send me the image with the same aspect ratio or resolution compared to the old images.
WHY THE FUCK YOU WANNA BLAME THE DEV TEAM WHEN YOUR GRAPHIC TEAM AND YOUR MARKETING TEAM IS SHIT?

2010: having so many toolbars intalled in the browser you can barely see the actual webpage.
2024: having so many banners and popups in the webpage you can barely see the actual webpage.

TL;DR: No YouTube Music! Fuck you.

Disclaimer: I could use an Adblocker but my old one always crashed and YouTubes Ads are short and not that bad - mostly just banners in the video player.

Rant: Yes google, I AM listening to music on youtube. I am your target audience for YouTube Music. But I am NOT interested.
You see, I wouldn't listen to music on YouTube if I had the spare money for Spotify, Apple Music or some other stupid overpriced service that gives the actual artists not enough of what they charge.

And giving me the same ad over and over again just annoys the fuck out of me. I DON'T WANT FUCKING YOUTUBE MUSIC. I am not interested in a free trial. I am not interested in buying it.
The most stupid thing is that Google provides a dislike and like button for ads. I pressed dislike so often yet it still comes up. GOOD QUALITY!

Why on earth is every fucking big company lost in copying every shit that others make and that has success? Where is my loved innovative Valve?! The innovative Google? They all just crave for fucking money making stuff. As if they still needed more...

I was looking for the autogenerated DevRant images for my end-of-the-year report and...

I've never been so happy to appear in a Google seach 😍😍

To the users who complain about small MS Edge banners on google.com, and on bing.
This kind of bullshit to convince users to download Google Chrome is 100 times worse.

I don’t know what the fuck is going on here in Limburg (province in Belgium) but companies seriously need to stop using Comic Sans

I see it on banners, trucks, flyers and just about everything .. it seriously triggers me 😩

related rant
if you do the conception of a web site in Photoshop/illustrator
and don't provide the text in a copypastable format FUCK YOU
if you use print ready images that are extra huge for web, and are of arbitrary sizes, and then placing them behind a mask FUCK YOU
also your fucking banners are square shaped , and the slider is wider than your mom,
.... man fuck this

Ukraine is the new BLM. What do I have to always see these banners on every website?

I just want to view the information on your website without being constantly reminded that the world is burning. I have CNN for that.

I fucking hate how much content I need to block with ublock to make websites less shit. Fuck your banners. Fuck your surveys, fuck your newsletters/mailing lists. And fuck your fucking shit website designs.

Can't be the only one who sits there individually blocking all annoying elements on sites with uBlock. Many hours 'wasted' for the sake of making everything a bit less shit

Edit:tags

Boss: Can I have you design our website?
Me: Yeah, of course. I'll send you some details for the design and after you approve it, I can get started on it.
Boss: Okay, send me stuff you find.

Fast-forward to two days later, he decided going through my design checklist was a hassle so bought a WordPress theme and just asked me to make 3 banners for its slider with no given context and no help as far as design and aesthetics are concerned... way to get my hopes up then bring them down. And designing them is making me so sleepy, I took a bathroom trip to nap for a while because the Wi-Fi won't stop disconnecting either.

Comment banners, urgh! >:(

/******************************/
/* Initialize */
/******************************/

Write a FUNCTION you lazy piece of ****!

Graphic & Web Designer
(job offer)

- graphical proposals for:
-web pages,
- banners,
- presentation materials,
- gaming graphic,
- application (iOS, Android) graphic...
Bla bla bla...

Min. 2 years profesional experience...
Valid certification and lvl of proficiency in (Adobe Photoshop, I lnDesign, Illustrator)...

Fast delivery....

Salary 3,50€ brutto / hr 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣....

Jobs in Slovakia 🤣

#RANT_AHEAD

Almost everyone nowadays uses a PC, Laptop, Smartphone but sadly not even 60% of the total potential of the hardware is being used.
.
And no - you don't require custom cooling to use the whole 100% of the total potential, stock cooling is more than enough.
.
IRL "programmers" these days don't do any fscking effort to optimise their code and give it all up as some kinda shitty "hot patch" - code of their looks disturbing with no security features + optimisation. (wAnBlOwS products remain an example)
.
Even when you're using python you can push your project to limits. Instead of shoving face-size ASCII banners why don't chaps stress test their projects? Oh I forgot the community runs on show-offs and CVs ...

.
Note to Self : Optimisation is the key to integrate Technology with Nature.

I applied for a job as Frontend Dev, went to an interview and was rejected... Well they offered me to come to another interview for another position and if I'm lucky I will do animated and interactive Banners with CSS animation and JS in the future! So freaking awesome!

So, we just gonna keep the cookie banners till all the paranoid boomers die off, or...

Few days ago a PPC campaign manager complained to me that the banners she got from her client were in an "unusual file format". Asked me to check it out because she couldn't open the file and she really needed the banners.

I kid you not, it had a .rar extension...
She, at the age of 30, had no idea what WinRar was...

How to learn Flash in 2 hours.
1. Take a job to amend some HTML5 banners.
2. Realize they were created in Flash/animate CC and exported to HTML5 Canvas
3. Have 'fun' learning a very innovative way to create banners...

Well to be honest as soon as I got the hang of it, it was not that bad, if you ignore the generated code.

Co worker who makes the sliders/ banners for the site asks how to get his form input beside on the right side... asks all three people in his department... worker with "20 years experience" says they should use "!important"
😳Ahhh best practice says DO IT RIGHT!

All designers and developers are secretly in love with cookie banners and other kinds of popups, as long as they distract users, obscure content and contain a lot of text that is hard to understand.

We must love to deceive our users and make them click a primary call to action button to make sure that they are fine with bypassing anything that privacy laws have been made for in the first place.

Or where are the best practice examples, code snippets and plugins do find a better way by default? Any commercial website will sooner or later require some kind of cookie banner and that's the whole point of contemporary web design.

I thought that making an android game was gonna be easy.
And it was easy.
I created everything from zero: logo, banners, UI, etc.
Yet today was uploading an update for internal test (friends and whatnot) and 2 minutes later I get an email from Google saying that my recent update was rejected due to "violation of impersonation policy".
Like what the heck
Did my research on the type of game I was doing, and nothing matched with what I was doing and yet I got banhammered :(

So last year I was working for this company and worked there for about 13 months. I was hired as a web dev but was soon moved on to creating web banners in html5 so that a friend who was doing that before could focus on design for prints. Well few days ago that friend called and said he was going on a vacation and was wondering if I would like to come back an fill in for him while he is on vacation.

Since the company can't find anyone willing or that did that job before and nows all the specs like I do I was their only choice for the job (yaay me). Of course I accepted the position as it wouldn't require me to be in their office from 9-5 but only on certain days when banners need to be created and for few hours only.

The downside of this is it will last for a whole month (didn't expect that) and it poses a chance to conflict with my current job. But my current boss is ok with me doing this as long as my "day job" doesn't get affected.

So now that I know I'm their only choice for the position and they don't have time to look for someone else and train them as the friend already left for vacation.

What do you guys think, how much should I charge them for this work ?

They are still waiting for my quote on the price.

I'm thinking of a fixed price for 1 month of work and somewhere around 600€ minimum.

My salary while working for that company full time was 400€ and I did web dev + banners (static and dynamic).

On a side note:
I heard from a few friends who still work there, that they might offer me full time job there again. But that is a whole new rant for another time

Task on freelancer : There are (too) many adblocker detection plugins. I want you to select one, test it at your local development environment (we will not provide) that it does the following:

- reliably discovers an AdBlocker

- does not interfere with regular ad serving (AdSense) if no AdBlocker is installed at user's browser

****- shows alternate banners (coming from our servers, so they look like regular pictures instead) even when AdBlocker is active *******
OKAY Now reality was that pre thought, pondered by PM ?
anyway adblocks seems doing Acceptable ads* which might be payed for ;)

PM: We need to add "Under Contract" banners dynamically to listings on xyz.com
Me: No problem
[ ... a few minutes later ... ]
Me: xyz.com has been updated. Check out the listings and let me know if anything is out of place.
PM: The updates you made look great! How does this scale (in the most basic sense of the word; i.e. in the viewport) on abc.com.
Me: ? òįÓ ? ... that's a completely different site ... why would it affect it if you didn't ask for it.

What is it with websites that restrict content with "We're not gonna let you get past us" banners blocking the page like they're gatekeepers?

Some even go the extra half mile of disabling right clicking 😕

Don't they learn from analytics when a coder comes through?

Maybe they should ask Heimdall for some advice.

In this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and cookie banners.

I’m just starting to explore online casinos, and to be honest, it’s overwhelming. Every site I open is filled with flashy banners, promises of huge bonuses, and terms I barely understand. I don’t want to waste money or sign up somewhere shady. What I really need is a beginner-friendly place that explains things clearly. Do you have any advice on where to start looking?

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