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Search - "fucking shit"
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#3 Worst thing I've seen a co-worker do?
A 20-something dev, 'A', back in the early days of twitter+facebook would post all his extracurricular activities (drinking, partying, normal young-buck stuff). The dev mgr, 'J', at the time took offense because he felt 'A' was making the company look bad, so 'A' had a target on his back. Nothing 'A' did was good enough and, for example, 'J' had the source control czars review 'A's code to 'review' (aka = find anything wrong). Not sorting the 'using' statements, and extra line after the closing }, petty things like that. For those curious, orders followed+carried out by+led by 'T' in my previous rant.
As time went on and 'T' finding more and more 'wrong' with A's code, 'J' put A on disciplinary probation. 'A' had 90 days to turn himself around, or else.
A bright spot was 'A' was working on a Delphi -> C# conversion, so a lot of the code would be green-field development and by simply following the "standards", 'A' would be fine...so he thought.
About 2 weeks into the probation, 'A' was called into the J's office and berated because the conversion project was behind schedule, and if he didn't get the project back on track, 'A' wouldn't make it 30 days. I sat behind 'A' and he unloaded on me.
<'A' slams his phone on his desk>
Me: "Whoa...whats up?"
A: "Dude, I fucking hate this place, did you hear what they did?"
<I said no, then I think we spent an hour talking about it>
Me: "That all sucks. Don't worry about the code. Nobody cares what T thinks. Its not even your fault the project is behind, the DBAs are tasked with upgrades and it's not like anyone is waiting on you. It'll get done when it's done. Sounds like a witch hunt, what did you do? Be honest."
A: "Well, um...I kinda called out J, T, and those other assholes on facebook. I was drunk, pissed, and ...well...here we are."
Me: "Geez, what a bunch of whiney snowflakes. Keep your head down and you'll get thru it, or don't. Its not like you couldn't find another job tomorrow."
A: "This is my first job out of college and I don't want to disappoint my dad by quitting. I don't even know what I'm supposed to be doing. All J told me was to get better. What the fuk does that even mean?"
Me: "He didn't give you any goals? Crap, for someone who is a stickler for the rules, that's low, even for J."
Fast forward 2 weeks, I was attending MS TechEd and I was with another dev mgr, R.
R: "Did you hear? We had to let 'A' go today."
Me: "What the hell? Why?"
R: "He couldn't cut it, so we had to let him go."
Me: "Cut what? What did he do, specifically?"
R: "I don't know, 'A' was on probation, I guess he didn't meet the goals."
Me: "You guess? We fire a developer working on a major upgrade and you guess? What were these so-called goals?"
R: "Whoa...you're getting a little fire up. I don't know, maybe not adhering to coding standards, not meeting deadlines?"
Me: "OMG...we fire people for not forming code? Are you serious!?"
R: "Oh...yea...that does sound odd when you put it that way. I wish I'd talk to you before we left on this trip"
Me: "What?! You knew they were firing him *before* we left? How long did you know this was happening?"
R: "Honestly, for a while. 'A' really wasn't a team player."
Me: "That's dirty, the whole thing is dirty. We've done some shitty things to people, but this is low, even for J. The probation process is meant to improve, not be used as a witch hunt. I don't like that you stood around and let it happen. You know better."
R: "Yea, you're right, but doesn't change anything. J wanted to do it while most of us were at the conference in case 'A' caused a scene."
Me: "THAT MAKES IT WORSE! 'A' was blindsided and you knew it. He had no one there that could defend him or anything."
R: "Crap, crap, crap...oh crap...jeez...J had this planned all along...crap....there is nothing I can do no...its too late."
Me: "Yes there is. If 'A' comes to you for a letter of recommendation, you write one. If someone calls for reference, you give him a good one."
R: "Yea..yea...crap...I feel like shit...I need to go back to the room and lie down."
As the sun sets, it rises again. Within a couple of weeks, 'A' had another job at a local university. Within a year, he was the department manager, and now he is a vice president (last time I checked) of a college in Kansas City, MO.13 -
Fuck the memes.
Fuck the framework battles.
Fuck the language battles.
Fuck the titles.
Anybody who has been in this field long enough knows that it doesn't matter if your linus fucking torvalds, there is no human who has lived or ever will live that simultaneously understands, knows, and remembers how to implement, in multiple languages, the following:
- jest mocks for complex React components (partial mocks, full mocks, no mocks at all!)
- token cancellation for asynchronous Tasks in C#
- fullstack CRUD, REST, and websocket communication (throw in gRPC for bonus points)
- database query optimization, seeding, and design
- nginx routing, https redirection
- build automation with full test coverage and environment consideration
- docker container versioning, restoration, and cleanup
- internationalization on both the front AND backends
- secret storage, security audits
- package management, maintenence, and deprecation reviews
- integrating with dozens of APIs
- fucking how to center a div
and that's a _comically_ incomplete list; barely scratches the surface of the full range of what a dev can encounter in a given day of writing software
have many of us probably done one or even all of these at different times? surely.
but does that mean we are supposed to draw that up at a moment's notice some cookie-cutter solution like a fucking robot and spit out an answer on a fax sheet?
recruiters, if you read this site (perhaps only the good ones do anyway so its wasted oxygen), just know that whoever you hire its literally the luck of the draw of how well they perform during the interview. sure, perhaps some perform better, but you can never know how good someone is until they literally start working at your org, so... have fun with that.
Oh and I almost forgot, again for you recruiters, on top of that list which you probably won't ever understand for the entirety of your lives, you can also add writing documentation, backup scripts, and orchestrating / administrating fucking JIRA or actually any somewhat technical dashboard like a CMS or website, because once again, the devs are the only truly competent ones - and i don't even mean in a technical sense, i mean in a HUMAN sense of GETTING SHIT DONE IN GENERAL.
There's literally 2 types of people in the world: those who sit around drawing flow charts and talking on the phone all day, and those WHO LITERALLY FUCKING BUILD THE WORLD
why don't i just run the whole fucking company at this point? you guys are "celebrating" that you made literally $5 dollars from a single customer and i'm just sitting here coding 12 hours a day like all is fine and well
i'm so ANGRY its always the same no matter where i go, non-technical people have just no clue, even when you implore them how long things take, they just nod and smile and say "we'll do it the MVP way". sure, fine, you can do that like 2 or 3 times, but not for 6 fucking months until you have a stack of "MVPs" that come toppling down like the garbage they are.
How do expect to keep the "momentum" of your customers and sales (I hope you can hear the hatred of each of these market words as I type them) if the entire system is glued together with ducktape because YOU wanted to expedite the feature by doing it the EASY way instead of the RIGHT way. god, just forget it, nobody is going to listen anyway, its like the 5th time a row in my life
we NEED tests!
we NEED to know our code coverage!
we NEED to design our system to handle large amounts of traffic!
we NEED detailed logging!
we NEED to start building an exception database!
BILBO BAGGINS! I'm not trying to hurt you! I'm trying to help you!
Don't really know what this rant was, I'm just raging and all over the place at the universe. I'm going to bed.20 -
Wow this one deserves a rant. Where should I even begin? I got a new job for over half a year now doing work in an agency. We're building websites and online shops with Typo3 and Shopware (not my dream, but hey). All fine you might think BUT...
1) I have been working on the BIGGEST project we have all by myself since I started working at this company. No help, nobody cares.
2) If something goes wrong all the shit falls back to me like "wHy DiDnT yoU WoRk MoRE?". Seriously? How should one dev cover a project that's meant for at least two or three.
3) The project was planned four years ago (YES that's a big fat FOUR) and sat there for 3,5 years - nobody gave a fuck. I got into the company and immediately got the sucky shit project to work on.
4) I was promised some time to get familiar with the projects and tech we use and "pick something I like most to get started". Well that never happened.
5) I was also promised not to talk directly to our customers. Well, each week I was bombarded with insults, a shitload of work and nonsense by our customers because (you guessed it) I was obligated to attend meetings.
6) The scheduled time for a meeting was 30 minutes, sometimes they just went on for over two hours. Fml.
7) Project management. It does not exist. The company is just out to get more and more clients, hires more god damn managers and shit and completely neglects that we might need more devs to get all this crap finished. Nope, they don't care. By the way: this is not like a 200 employee company, it's more like 15 which makes it even sadder to have 4 managers and 3 devs.
8) We don't use trello (or anything to keep track of our "progress"), nobody knows the exact scope of the project, because it was planned FOUR FUCKING YEARS AGO.
9) They planned to use 3 months on this project to get it finished (by the way it's not just an online shop, it has a really sophisticated product configurator with like 20 dependencies). Well, we're double over that time period and it is still not finished.
10) FUCK YOU SHOPWARE
11) The clients are super unsatisfied with our service (who would have guessed). They never received official documents from us (that's why nobody knows the scope), nor did they receive the actual screen design of the shop so we just have to make it up on the go. Of course I mean "I" by "we", because appearently it is my job to develop, design and manage this shit show.
12) My boss regularly throws me in front of the bus by randomly joining meetings with my client telling them the complete opposite of things that we discussed internally (he doesn't know anything about this stupid project)
13) FUCK YOU COLLEAGUES, FUCK YOU COMPANY, FUCK YOU SHOPWARE AND FUCK YOU STUPID CUSTOMERS.
14) Oh btw. the salary sucks ass, it's barely a couple of bucks above minimum wage. Don't ask me why I accepted the offer. I guess it was better than nothing in the meantime.
Boy that feels good. I needed that rant. But hey don't get me wrong. I get that dev jobs can be hard and sucky, but this is beyond stupidity that I can bear. I therefore applied for a dev job in research at a university in my dream country. Nice colleagues, interesting projects, good project management. They accepted me, gave me a good offer and I can happily say that in 6-7 weeks my current company can go fuck themselves (nobody knows the 10.000+ lines of code but me). Just light it up and watch it burn!19 -
An intern I was supposed to lead (as an intern) and work with. Which sounded kinda crazy to me, but also fun so I rolled with it. But when I met her I quickly found out she didn't even have a coding editor installed and when I advised one she was "scared of virusses". She had Microsoft Edge in her toolbar, and some picture of a cat as a background. We were given some project by our boss, and a freelance programmer helped us set it up on Trello. Great, lets start! Oke maybe first some R&D, she had to reaeach how to use the Twilio API. After catching her on WhatsApp a few times I realised this wasnt gonna go anywere. After a few weeks of coding and posting a initial project to git I asked her if she could show me the code of the API she made so far..
She told me she was using the quickstart guide (the last 3 FUCKING weeks) which contained some test project with specific use cases.
The one that I did 3 weeks ago that same fucking morning.
AND SHE WAS STILL NOT DONE...
A few days later I asked her about the progress (strangly, I wasn't allowed ti give her another task bcs the freelanc already did) and guess what... She got fking pissed at me
Her: "I will come to you when im done, ok?"
Me: "I just want to see how it is going so far and if you are running into any problems!"
Her: "I dont want to show you right now"
She then goes to my fucking boss to tell him I am bothering her.
And omg... Please dear god please kill me now...
Instead of him saying the she probably didn't do shit. He says to me that the girl thinks im looking down on her and she needs a stress free environment to work in. She will show me when its done. ITS A FUCKING QUICKSTART GUIDE YOU DUMB BITCH.
He then procceeded to whine to me about the email template (another project I do at the same time) which didn't look perfect in all of his clients.
Dont they understand that I am not a frontend developer? Can you stop please? I know nothing about email templates, I told you this!!!
Really... the whole fucking internship the only thing the girl did was ask people if they want more tea. Then she starts cleaning the windows, talk to people for an hour, or clean everyone's dask.
all this while I already made 50% of the fucking product and she just finished the quickstart tutorial 😭. Truly 2 months wasted, and the worse thing is I didn't get any apprication. They constantly blamed me and whined at me. Sometimes for being 3 minutes late, the other for smoking too much, or because I drink to much coffee, or that I dont eat healthy. They even forced me to play Ping Pong. While im just trying to do my job. One of the worst things they got mad at me for if when my laptop got hacked bcs it was infected with some virus. He had remote access and bought 5 iPhones 6's with my paypal while I was on break. I had to go home and quickly reset all my passwords and make sure the iPhones wouldnt get delivered. strange this was, this laptop I only used at the company. So it must have been software I had to download there. Probably phpstorm (torrent). Bcs nobody would give me a license. And the freelancer said I * have to *.
the monday after I still had to reinstall windows so I called them and said I would be late. when I came they were so disrepectfull and didn't understand anything. It went a little like this:
Boss: why u late?
Me: had to reinstall my laptop, sorry.
Boss: why didnt you do this in your own time?
Me: well, I didn't have any time.
Boss: cant you do this in the weekend or something? Because now we have to pay you several hours bcs you downloaded something at home.
Me: I am only using this laptop for work so thats not possible.
Boss: how can that even be possible? You are not doing anything at home with your laptop? Is that why you never do anything at home?
Me: uhm, I have desktop computer you know. Its much faster. And I also need to rest sometimes. Areeb (freelancer) told me to torrent the software. He gave me the link. 2 days later this happends
Boss: Ahh okeee I see.. Well dont let it happen again.
After that nobody at the compamy trusted me with anything computer related. Yes it was my own fault I downloaded a virus but it can happen to anyone. After that I never used Windows again btw, also no more auto login apps.8 -
Me talking to a recruiter (even though I am not looking for a job)
Me: If I walk into an interview, and they ask me to reverse a binary tree for a frontend Reac or Vue position or something along those lines, I will end the call and/or walk away from it.
Him: I get similar feelings from other programmers, I don't quite understand why the notion is as common
Me: Because it is fucking useless, it servers no purpose to a dev to know about that when building frontends with react, I link my github profile, for which they can find advanced backend-frontend related projects, compiler and interpreter projects, plus the title I currently have at my workplace and a bunch of other shit, I am not interviewing for a teaching position at an institute, but an actual place of work, for which if they want to know about DS and A they can review my profile which has a repo of DS and A in about 5 different languages including plain C++. I do not need to be offended by such notions since they server no purpose on the frontend, and neither do other devs. If anything it should be a casual conversation during the interview, not a basis for employment.
Recruiter: .........thank you for explaining this to me, I am sure I can bring it up to the agencies doing the reviews and interviews. Are you still interested?
Me: Are they going to give me a coding assignment for a project or a bs question like what I mentioned?
Him: I don't know
Me: then I am not interested12 -
I was once working for a company as a part time dev in the centrum of my city.
After working there for almost 1 year I noticed that I didn't get paid the last 2 months. I think it was about 500 euro's. (1 day per week).
So I went on my bike to the company to see whatsup. I came into the store and told my boss I hadn't been paid for 2 months. Even tho I did work.
He then got so angry! Just started yelling "YEAH BECAUSE THE PROJECT ISNT NEAR COMPLETE, NOTHING IS WORKING" I explained him the panel still had to be configured and that everything he asked me to do had been programmed and he then fucking told me he wanted it a different way even tho we clearly discussed it WEEKS AGO and he clearly said what he wanted. so he wanted dont revisions. I told him that this is not possible at this moment because holidays are around the corner and I want to go om vacation. (and he too!!!)
He then got so fucking angry he said "come with me for a second" we walk to the door of the building and then he just pushed me out of there and kicked me in my back.
I got so fucking pissed, I opened the door and asked him if je thinks this is a normal way to discuss. He closed the store door again, and I couldnt hold back anymore. I threw my full can of Red Bull against the glass door. The can exploded, and his whole fucking window had energy drink on it. He took some fucking steal pipe, so I walked back. But while trying to get away I jumped on his store sign. Which broke into pieces (they are quite expanasive). He came outside with his fucking pipe and he was trying to hit me. We had a crowd and people started yelling at him. I walked away but the asshole took my bike and put it inside his store. So that I couldnt leave.
So than I called the cops and reported him. For minor assault and some other things. Shortly after I deleted the entire project from his stupid server.
I really dont know this kinda shit happends, he probably felt like I didn't deserve that money even tho I did everything he asked for within deadline. Trying to solve it after vacation was also not an option. I signed him up for a few news letters after that.11 -
New office.
They gave me a fucking Mac. It's a fucking nightmare to operate this machine efficiently and effectively.
Piece of shit. I had given a preference of Windows and yet they shoved this PoS in my face.
What a cognitive load to deal with on constant basis.57 -
Ok you fucks that don't believe in documentation - me included.
Document your shit, because one day, one day some dumb fuck is going to have to recreate your over engineered bullshit of a system and scale it up.
What would fucking be useful right now is ANY god forsaken insight into what in the flying fuck your code is doing, or not doing, or why it makes queries to a database with no fucking records in it 🤦♂️ and then attempts to use that data... in case it did exist.
There's nothing like unpicking a mess of bullshit, and documenting it, and then have to remake it on a new platform.
Documention saves lives kids, maybe your own life one day😬16 -
ALRIGHT
WHAT FUCKING DUMBASS AT APPLE DECIDED THAT YOUR AIRPODS SHOULD PAIR WITH YOUR
CLOSED
FUCKING
MACBOOK
INSTEAD OF YOUR ACTIVELY SEARCHING IPHONE
PRODUCT MANAGERS ARE SHIT
DEVELOPERS ARE SHIT
THE WORST IS KNOWING THEY ALL EARN EASILY 6 FIGURES
AND ARE ABSOLUTE GARBAGE AT EVERYTHING16 -
FUCK CORPORATE EMAIL SPAM
AND I DON'T MEAN SOME SOME EXTERNAL SCAM/AD/PISHING EMAILS
I MEAN THE SHIT MY OWN COMPANY SENDS TO ME
LIKE:
"tHE WelLbeIng Course : SiGN In now!!!!!"
"#MoRnIngcOfFEE witH SOME cORporatE TWAt"
"Give togetHER : LETs circLE JerK OurSeLveS in SOMe fuCKiNg oNLiNe mEetInG !!!!!!!"
I DON'T FUCKING CARE !
I GET DOZENS (IF NOT FUCKING HUNDREDS) OF SUCH SHIT EMAILS EVERY DAY.
IF I GO ON VACATION, I HAVE TO SPEND HOURS TO SORT SHIT OUT
I HAVE HAD TO SET UP ELABORATE OUTLOOK RULES TO GET IT SORTED AUTOMATICALLY INTO SOME MANAGEABLE FOLDERS (AND SPEND SOME OF MY LIMITED TIME, HERE ON EARTH, TO DO SO)
AND GUESS WHAT
THANKS TO THOSE STUPID RULES I MISSED, ONE FUCKING IMPORTANT EMAIL
CAN YOU JUST STOP FUCKING SPAMMING ME ?!!!
FOR CHRIST SAKE AND I DON'T CARE ABOUT THIS STUPID CORPORATE BULLSHIT
STOP SENDING IT TO ME8 -
It's always the same shit with some developers. Someone notices that an app is calling an API way too much, causing it to throttle. This is caused by a UI that does ~100-400 HTTP requests when you open a page. Someone comes and offers multiple solutions to cut down those requests by changing the UI behavior, dropping the request amount to less than 10% or maybe even zero.
Then comes one developer "WhY cAn'T We bAtCh thE ReQueSts?" Well, you fucking blockhead, what's the point in rendering 300 items on a page anyway when at any given time a user can maybe see five of them on his screen? These numbskulls have zero idea of how to solve technical issues with simple UX tweaks. Learn some UI/UX design if you're a front-end developer ffs.9 -
What an absolute fucking disaster of a day. Strap in, folks; it's time for a bumpy ride!
I got a whole hour of work done today. The first hour of my morning because I went to work a bit early. Then people started complaining about Jenkins jobs failing on that one Jenkins server our team has been wanting to decom for two years but management won't let us force people to move to new servers. It's a single server with over four thousand projects, some of which run massive data processing jobs that last DAYS. The server was originally set up by people who have since quit, of course, and left it behind for my team to adopt with zero documentation.
Anyway, the 500GB disk is 100% full. The memory (all 64GB of it) is fully consumed by stuck jobs. We can't track down large old files to delete because du chokes on the workspace folder with thousands of subfolders with no Ram to spare. We decide to basically take a hacksaw to it, deleting the workspace for every job not currently in progress. This of course fucked up some really poorly-designed pipelines that relied on workspaces persisting between jobs, so we had to deal with complaints about that as well.
So we get the Jenkins server up and running again just in time for AWS to have a major incident affecting EC2 instance provisioning in our primary region. People keep bugging me to fix it, I keep telling them that it's Amazon's problem to solve, they wait a few minutes and ask me to fix it again. Emails flying back and forth until that was done.
Lunch time already. But the fun isn't over yet!
I get back to my desk to find out that new hires or people who got new Mac laptops recently can't even install our toolchain, because management has started handing out M1 Macs without telling us and all our tools are compiled solely for x86_64. That took some troubleshooting to even figure out what the problem was because the only error people got from homebrew was that the formula was empty when it clearly wasn't.
After figuring out that problem (but not fully solving it yet), one team starts complaining to us about a Github problem because we manage the github org. Except it's not a github problem and I already knew this because they are a Problem Team that uses some technical authoring software with Git integration but they only have even the barest understanding of what Git actually does. Turns out it's a Git problem. An update for Git was pushed out recently that patches a big bad vulnerability and the way it was patched causes problems because they're using Git wrong (multiple users accessing the same local repo on a samba share). It's a huge vulnerability so my entire conversation with them went sort of like:
"Please don't."
"We have to."
"Fine, here's a workaround, this will allow arbitrary code execution by anyone with physical or virtual access to this computer that you have sitting in an unlocked office somewhere."
"How do I run a Git command I don't use Git."
So that dealt with, I start taking a look at our toolchain, trying to figure out if I can easily just cross-compile it to arm64 for the M1 macbooks or if it will be a more involved fix. And I find all kinds of horrendous shit left behind by the people who wrote the tools that, naturally, they left for us to adopt when they quit over a year ago. I'm talking entire functions in a tool used by hundreds of people that were put in as a joke, poorly documented functions I am still trying to puzzle out, and exactly zero comments in the code and abbreviated function names like "gars", "snh", and "jgajawwawstai".
While I'm looking into that, the person from our team who is responsible for incident communication finally gets the AWS EC2 provisioning issue reported to IT Operations, who sent out an alert to affected users that should have gone out hours earlier.
Meanwhile, according to the health dashboard in AWS, the issue had already been resolved three hours before the communication went out and the ticket remains open at this moment, as far as I know.5 -
I fucking want to skin alive my engineering senior director and VP.
Fucking piece of shit people. Looking at their faces from behind the screen, I can sense them stink doneky balls.
They have made my life hell.
The entire tech architecture is absolute shit in nature and engineers cannot even build a single blue colour button without creating a major fuss about it.
Every single aspect of product is built kept in my only the engineer persona. Everyone else can go and suck a racoon's dick.
And they have no concept of tech debt. They just keep building and building stuff. And then build some more.
Entire engineering org is in rush to ship shit at the end of sprint and if they don't then VP and Director are pissed. So to keep those two half witted donkeys happy, these people ship garbage. And all they comment is "cool, very cool".
And hence, entire fucking product is built because it's cool irrespective of whether it solves a problem or not.
A single user role authorisation or authentication is so fucking complex that it would take an eternity for even a developer to figure what's happening.
Fucking toxic human wastes.
There's a company wide mandate to use a certain tech stack, design guidelines, and a vision that all teams have to align. But these faggots are going in opposite direction to do what they feel like and forcing everyone else to ignore all other engagements or alignments with other teams.
These two people should be skinned alive in town square during noon and then left there until they dehydrate entirely. Fucking baboons.
I am so fucking pissed with such mindset.10 -
God damn fucking Windows bullshit.
Why is the fuck does Microsoft HATE its users?
Latest updates, and no fuck Windows 11, completely BREAKS all of my WSL environments.
Home directories are gone, or the environments are corrupt and won't even run.
99% of the issues these dense shit-fucks cause are because they RaNdOmLy reboot for their dumbass updates instead of scheduling them with the end user. During these rebots, do you thing they wait for everything to shut down?
HELL NO!
They just shut that shit down like they fucking own it. Editors? Gone. Browsers? Gone. WSL Consoles? Gone. Docker containers? Gone. IEdge? Hey, we have great news, we made IE your default browser again! BTW, your upgrade to Windows 11 is free until we force you to upgrade!
I'm so fed up with it.....so fucking tired of it...
The only reason why I even use WSL these days is to ssh into my Linux devices or run some quick dev tests in containers. Why not use PuTTY for SSH? Because it fucking SUCKS that's why.
I'm feeling so many emotions right now over bullshit that shouldn't even be happening. I'm literally at the point that I'm just going to install Linux on this device and just create a Windows VM on one of my hosts so I can still do "work" things that involve leadership.18 -
So I just found out that my colleague who I often have to work with does not use a debugger to troubleshoot any bugs at all. Actually, he does not even run or test his code locally either with prints or something similar. He just commits java code directly on bitbucket, no source control, without making sure it compiles and then he runs a CI provided by devops that takes 4 freaking hours to run because he bloated that shit up somehow.
I suggested politely to help him find a more efficient approach and to use my hardware setups for speeding up his work because I assume it must be pretty painful to work with, but he just refused.
That and those "seniors" with 10 years Linux development XP in the embedded field who don't know basic commands like ls, cat and touch and code in notepad.
Fucking me, who the hell am I working with and can someone please end me?6 -
Post after a long long time...
Wanted to reply to so many comments and mentions, rant about a bunch of topics, do a face reveal after I went for a vacation with family and got some pictures, update y'all on my job hunt, but was busy like hell.
Anyway, time for a story.
After my rejection with Meta and Booking, I started preparing like crazy and my interviews started going well. Refined my LinkedIn further and recruiters started reaching out as well.
Over time, with efforts and feedback, I was able to build a good pipeline.
One of my dream companies reached out to me and I got hired in just 1 round and all others were merely a formality. I was euphoric, but at the same time didn't get over excited as this seemed fishy.
They made a very good monetary offer and I didn't talk to my manager yet regarding resignation. They are pushing me for an early joining.
Read a bunch of Glassdoor reviews and also spoke to a friend who just recently quit that organisation.
He confirmed that the company has 3 months of notice, has sandwich leave policy, and some other XLT political mess.
I decided to decline the offer tomorrow.
Day saved? Not yet.
Because of this I slacked off work a lot. I am super screwed with work items pending because I thought I'd quit.
My boss resinged and new one isn't that supportive yet. He is trying to change everything overnight. Typical.
I ended up performing poorly in other companies because I was confident I'll pick this offer and didn't prepare for upcoming good companies.
Moreover, we have our offices opening up from April and I might be asked to relocate to another city which does not have a team but just because it is on paper, they might force me to be in office 50% of the time.
And what's worse is, my relationship with tech is deteriorating and they are putting the entire product team in bad light.
I have a planned weekend trip coming up, so I won't be able to prepare for interviews or work on case studies so that shit will pile up more.
I am sooooo fucking screwed. Life was stable and then all of a sudden too 180° flip.
I am hysterical right now.17 -
A brief, and biased opinion of what love is in the dev world:
Love is my employees bringing me something to eat when they know I stay back so that they can all go out do whatever they can do.
Love is my CMS admin getting his ass up and walking all the way to my office when the director walks in to say some STUPID FUCKING SHIT to me that he(CMS Admin) knows would have me 2 fucking seconds away from getting out of my chair and drop kicking the fuck out of him.
Love is the rest of my employees getting up to follow along in case(certainly) one dude is not able to hold me down.
Love is them knowing that I know that their mere presence there will make me chill the fuck out and not choke the fucking director
Love is the CMS Admin proof reading every email I send to a bitch that was trying to get smart, to make sure that I was not being agressive.
Love is said CMS Admin bringing me coffee or a coke congratulating me on listening to him about X email not being aggressive (there is no passive in my vocabulary, just balls out "isn't this your fucking job" aggressive)
Love is my lead developer showing to work after medical treatment fucked up as all hell because he knows that if he is not there I will do a billion things myself in order to give him some rest.
Love is taking my CMS admin and lead dev out to eat when a major stakeholder shits on something I damn well know it took them a while to finish. Love is also letting me open up to said stakeholder to tell them how much of a fucktard they are, sometimes they let me loose, and I appreciate that.
Love is every small person in the company approaching you to tell you of their issues, becuase they care more about the productivity they give to their users, rather than the bullshit numbers their managers care about.
Love is the staff of other places taking care of you because you are not a VP dickhead that treats them like shit.
Love is the HR reps sending you personal e-mails asking you for help because their shitbag of a boss does not count for help and leaves them in the blank with shit software, for which said HR go above and beyond for you later on even though said shitbag manager said no.
Love is your team getting angry and responding respectfully at people when they talk shit about their manager on their emails (manager being me)
Love is your employees closing your door for you when they know you are overwhelmed and you need a quick second to pull yourself up.
Love is not wanting to leave this miserable place because you know some dickweed will be left in charge of the people that care for you, trust you, work for you regardless of the date, and confide in you.
They got me locked in, this shitty institution, for now. Until I find a way to bring my entire team with me.8 -
Once upon a time, there were a restaurant called "iEat.tech.com".
It was a small single-location place, where the sufficient number of patrons could be served by the cozy number of employees.
In fact, headcount was so lean that the cook was also the one who washed all the dishes.
But then came the suits and their "VC"(daddy) money and scaled shit up.
Soon, there were so many patrons that the dishes started to pile up the sink, never washed.
"We need someone to wash the dishes!" said the cook
"Fuck you, you wash the dishes!" said the s*its
Naturally, the cook left soon after.
The s*its had a problem now. They could not replace the cook fast enough - all other cooks were either young, inexperienced and mediocre (but did clean the dishes), or refused to waste their time on the sink.
So the suits did what $*its always do - they got a fucking consultant. Who told them to get a fucking dishwashing machine and billed them the GDP of Ireland.
The s*is, of course, did not want to buy a dishwashing machine. "Our fucking process is too fucking disruptive for us to use a fucking store-bought mass-produced metal servant!" (s*its don't know what "machines" are. For them, it's all in terms of "servants", employees and machines alike).
So the s*its hired an engineer to "solve the fucking dish problem, once and for all".
The engineer quickly started measuring and drawing and calculating. The engineer was about to prepare a budget when the s*its came screaming "What the fuck are you doing? There is a fucking pile of dishes in the sink!"
The engineer replied that "I'm designing the machine!", to what the s*its responded "don't bring me fucking problems, bring me solutions!" (or some other s*it blabber)
So the engineer quickly designed an efficient dishwashing assembly line to be done in half the time most people would. And then went back to designing the machine.
But the s*its were having none of it. They kept expanding and expanding and doing what they could so that the engineer never had a moment to work on the machine. They dit it so surreptitiously that no one barely even noticed, but one day they were paying a team of engineers to be fucking human dishwashers.
Now replace "dishes" with "Jira tickets" or "quick fixes" or "tiny changes" and fix other terms accordingly.
Fucking s*its.8 -
You know what, fuck microshit to fuck town and back again.
What part of disabling "allow the computer to turn of this device to save power"
DO YOU NOT FUCKIJG UNDERSTAND!
MY FUCKING USB'S ARE GOING FUCKING MENTAL SWITCHING ON AND OFF LIKE A DRUNKEN HOBO YOU COCK FUCKS.
my week is a complete and utter shit of a week as it is, I don't need this bullshit on top of it too.
#Microsoft, fix your fucking shit already!4 -
wE oNlY uSe 10% oF bRaIn pOwEr
yeah, no shit, now go to your computer and launch 400 chrome tabs. Congrats, now you're using 100% of your computer performance. Does it work well now? Quick and snappy innit?
fucking muppets.16 -
My CTO prefers to hire very expensive consultants than to trust on staff. It's funny, because he also decided that all technical teams should run on the absolute minimal amount of resources.
You can't imagine how shitty it felt this morning when he sent an email talking about a security consultant that we should hire, just because he thinks the guy could "take our expertise to the next level".
They will charge us 450/hour to run assessments, to find the exact same things my team discovered a year ago.rant consultant fucking moron my cto is a piece of shit we all know this cto should be fired overpriced5 -
Dear Boss
Would you.
Fucking.
PLEASE.
Stop.
Moving.
The Standup.
Time.
You've fucked around with the meeting time eight times since the end of Jan. Figure your schedule out, pick a time for our daily shit, and stick to it dude. PLEASE.
I'm a family man and you're making my mornings absolute hell to plan for.
Signed,
me.5 -
My level of frustration with Microsoft is growing to a point that I'm unable to contain it.
They buy Github, it was a great tool for developers because is FUCKING WORKED! New features were never beta tested on users unless they requested it.
Why in the absolute fuck am I getting all these new experimental bullshit features that literally make it harder for me to do my god damned job?
They provide me NOTHING but grief and sleepless weekends while I fix the god damned pipeline that's worked perfectly fine for YEARS.
Your business model is bad and your products are SHIT.
Fuck you Microsoft, I cannot even stress it enough. If I had a time machine that could go back 5 years and my options were: Tell the world about Covid, make sure Trump never became president, or stop the Github purchse. I would hunt down and brutally attack the team of executives that decided to buy Microsoft.
Words cannot adequately describe how much I want Microsoft to fuck off. If the company was a person and they died in a house fire it wouldn't be enough.
I just want a VCS that does what it's supposed to do. I don't need pipelines, I don't need image repos, I don't need static code analysis.
I JUST NEED A FUCKING VCS THAT CONTROLS VERSIONS OF SOFTWARE YOU IGNORANT FUCKS.20 -
Windows 10 is a fucking piece of shit. It's the worst software ever made. It's the worst program ever written in the entire computer history.28
-
Manager: Can you stay late as fuck today? One of our bitchiest vendors is gonna update their piece of crap and I'm pretty damn sure shit is gonna hit the fan
Dev (inner voice): no fucking way, I have kids to watch and chores to do!
Dev (outer voice): can't we just check everything in the morning?
Manager: No fucking way! If there is some fucking "challenge" when our "people" try to log onto their shit, I'm gonna look like a chump!
Let's talk silvers, I will sign on that bloody commie bullshit for your hours tonight.
Dev (outer voice): Fine. Until how late?
Dev (inner voice): Wait, I was supposed to do it without getting overtime bonus?5 -
4 hours! four fucking hours! f.o.u.r. h.o.u.r.s.!
It's the amount in the time domain this bug has cost me to fix. The cost in the sanity domain is immeasurable...
I swear, the god damn ass births of devs who coded this abomination should be slowly mutilated and then raped by their own severed limbs.
It took me 4 hours to figure out that their 12 year old binary CLI tool they used to generate PDFs from PHP could not handle neither HTML5 nor some linebreaks at specific places. Some part of it is due to them using REGEX to find and replace HTML tag.
Yes, I am indeed very pissed. And I need a 🥃 or 3
What we learned:
- Don't use REGEX to "parse" HTML
- Don't call random compiled CLI tools from PHP if there are PHP packages to do the same shit9 -
I am Done! I am extremely burnt out and unhappy with my work. I have been doing this professionally for over 5 years now and much longer than that unprofessionally.
This new company I joined finally gave me the salary I always dreamt of but now I am extremely unhappy and depressed and anxious all the time. And I don't like the work I am doing. I don't like the team. I hate being isolated at home for over 2 years, working from home. I had a mental breakdown in the middle of the meeting the other day. And after that, I said. that's it. I am done. So, I gave the resignation letter. I don't know what I am gonna do. But I sure as hell can't do this shit any longer. But now, the fucking hr is making it even more difficult for me by not letting me leave without serving the notice period. I told her I am on fucking medication and I am having severe mental health issues. Now, she wants to see the medical certificate. Or I have to pay two months' salary. WTF? If I had that kind of money lying around, I wouldn't have slaved myself away at your shitty company, would I?
I went to my psychiatrist whom I have been seeing consulting for the last couple of years now. I asked for a medical certificate and he thinks it'll hamper my future career. So, he said I should get a certificate from a general physician. So, that's the world we live in then? You can't even speak the truth? And the way HR is behaving over the mail makes me feel like a total slave. I mean I am not at all fit for work these days, and it feels like, if she had her way, she would tie me down to a chair and ask me to push out code. what the fucking fuck. This is some fucked up industry and I think I am finally done with software development. But now, I don't have any idea what I am gonna do with my life or how am I gonna earn money. I am so burnt out and anxious that even the thought of working again gives me panic attacks. even working from home. What the fuck do I do?8 -
I fucking got scammed.
Scenario 1: Had literally no experience in B2C, no experience in experimentation, 0% fitment.
Verdict: got hired in just one round in a top domestic brand which is a profit making startup.
Scenario 2: A friend from ex-org got referred in a global brand for an international location. Hadn't interviewed for 4+ years. Created his resume in 15 minutes, got shortlisted, screened, interviewed, and hired in less than 2 weeks.
(This guy is a good friend I am incredibly happy for him and that he scored the gig and in now way I wish bad for his outcome).
Scenario 3: I also got a strong refferal for the same brand and location. I have been interviewing for past 6 months, resume is super polished where companies like FAANG spoke to me.
Got rejected in shortlisting. The referral guy got me in the pool because it was his team
In screening round, I was a good fit, answered everything well. Yes, I wasn't concise as much (and that's the feedback I kept getting and I was working on it).
Verdict: rejected. They didn't ask me relevant questions and rejected me on the basis of not having the required experience.
Seems like the hiring manager didn't want me to clear so came up with reasons.
And now it feels that, if the HM wants you, they'll hire you irrespective of anything and if they don't they'll kick you out for lamest of the reason.
My life is split in two part, the first three decades were surely shit and this was my last chance of making sure the next three are worth remembering on the death bed.
I failed. Miserably. For the factors outside of my control. Not that I haven't failed in past. Not that I didn't try again.
But man, I am doing persisting. The game is rigged. One cannot win without extreme luck.
Millions of dreams shattered. A shitty day, is now a shitty life.
Being born in third nation is a fucking curse.7 -
Urgh, fucking excel!
Why the fuck can't you handle a few thousand calculations you dumb ass piece of shit.
I am this close to... fuck, it crashed. 🤦♂️
I fucking give up.
Time to strap this data to a DB instead.rant formulas are great they said useless pile of shit clowns shit better then you you had 1 job stop fucking crashing excel8 -
I have a friend that every 2 days posts stories of her being in a club or something similar, dressed up and make up everywhere, with lots of drinks and shit like that. Girl has 0 skills and is living on the money that her dead parent left her. Honestly, shit looks fucking exhausting.
I hate clubs and being out with people. I do love drinking and having a good time... but every 2 days for it to be something? man I already feel tired and it ain't even my life.22 -
Monday morning: The last straw.
After talking about in a previous rant about how my client wants to fix bugs that keeps popping out after bug fix.
Today I discovered, that all C-levels, worked all Saturday to "fix my code" because it "didn't work" and we "needed bug fixes not pretty things".
The app version I was working on for the last week is gone. Without mentioning that their "CTO" wrote a fucking crappy code to disable features that I added, breaking the build step.
This shit is enough for me, I'm done!3 -
BGP went down during new year and I had to endure the noise while reviving a dead switch from chassis.
Because a fucking intern decided it was fine to try broadcast internal shit.2 -
Fuck all of those stupid fucking shitty spam and scam bots there is everywhere. I swear epsically on every single comment on youtube you would at least encounter one bot comment (thats if you are lucky) or on discord the amount of spam/scams you receive is ridiculous.
I swear everything i accidentially read any of that shit i lose the remining of my brain cells.
That should be a living proof of some human lives are completely worthless and why exeuction could be justified.
So if you are one of those kinds of people, who develop those kinds of bots, i have one thing to say. Fuck you and your inbreed incest familiy, i wouldnt call 911 on you, not even if you paid me a million dollars you human trashbag scum.8 -
Why the fuck do managers think beacuse a component has been build by another developer a shit ton of time ago, we can still reuse that fucking code.
For fucks sake, I had to rebuild a whole fucking map component that needed contextual filter and the fuckers just add extra functionality without consulting me. And gave me a tight schedule bc the customer, who btw disappeared for 6 months, will be mad for wasting his precious fucking time.
Fuck these clients.9 -
How fucking hard is it to remain consistent with naming, holy shit! Is it register, sign up, create user and is it user, client, customer, account.. then you have the API to contend with, with it's own terminology! This is such crap.6
-
Sweet lord jesus I fucking hate React! I hate whatever those idiots at facebook or whoever decided to change how everything works 15 fucking times in the span of 4 versions. For fuck sakes, the errors are shit. The documentation is shit, the answers to questions are useless!
I hate this fucking framework with a burning passion, I want nothing more than to shove the entirety of the populous that developed this garbage up zuckerburgs ass and then drown him in a vat of boiling piss and motor oil.
Fuck react.16 -
EoS1: This is the continuation of my previous rant, "The Ballad of The Six Witchers and The Undocumented Java Tool". Catch the first part here: https://devrant.com/rants/5009817/...
The Undocumented Java Tool, created by Those Who Came Before to fight the great battles of the past, is a swift beast. It reaches systems unknown and impacts many processes, unbeknownst even to said processes' masters. All from within it's lair, a foggy Windows Server swamp of moldy data streams and boggy flows.
One of The Six Witchers, the Wild One, scouted ahead to map the input and output data streams of the Unmapped Data Swamp. Accompanied only by his animal familiars, NetCat and WireShark.
Two others, bold and adventurous, raised their decompiling blades against the Undocumented Java Tool beast itself, to uncover it's data processing secrets.
Another of the witchers, of dark complexion and smooth speak, followed the data upstream to find where the fuck the limited excel sheets that feeds The Beast comes from, since it's handlers only know that "every other day a new one appears on this shared active directory location". WTF do people often have NPC-levels of unawareness about their own fucking jobs?!?!
The other witchers left to tend to the Burn-Rate Bonfire, for The Sprint is dark and full of terrors, and some bigwigs always manage to shoehorn their whims/unrelated stories into a otherwise lean sprint.
At the dawn of the new year, the witchers reconvened. "The Beast breathes a currency conversion API" - said The Wild One - "And it's claws and fangs strike mostly at two independent JIRA clusters, sometimes upserting issues. It uses a company-deprecated API to send emails. We're in deep shit."
"I've found The Source of Fucking Excel Sheets" - said the smooth witcher - "It is The Temple of Cash-Flow, where the priests weave the Tapestry of Transactions. Our Fucking Excel Sheets are but a snapshot of the latest updates on the balance of some billing accounts. I spoke with one of the priestesses, and she told me that The Oracle (DB) would be able to provide us with The Data directly, if we were to learn the way of the ODBC and the Query"
"We stroke at the beast" - said the bold and adventurous witchers, now deserving of the bragging rights to be called The Butchers of Jarfile - "It is actually fewer than twenty classes and modules. Most are API-drivers. And less than 40% of the code is ever even fucking used! We found fucking JIRA API tokens and URIs hard-coded. And it is all synchronous and monolithic - no wonder it takes almost 20 hours to run a single fucking excel sheet".
Together, the witchers figured out that each new billing account were morphed by The Beast into a new JIRA issue, if none was open yet for it. Transactions were used to update the outstanding balance on the issues regarding the billing accounts. The currency conversion API was used too often, and it's purpose was only to give a rough estimate of the total balance in each Jira issue in USD, since each issue could have transactions in several currencies. The Beast would consume the Excel sheet, do some cryptic transformations on it, and for each resulting line access the currency API and upsert a JIRA issue. The secrets of those transformations were still hidden from the witchers. When and why would The Beast send emails, was still a mistery.
As the Witchers Council approached an end and all were armed with knowledge and information, they decided on the next steps.
The Wild Witcher, known in every tavern in the land and by the sea, would create a connector to The Red Port of Redis, where every currency conversion is already updated by other processes and can be quickly retrieved inside the VPC. The Greenhorn Witcher is to follow him and build an offline process to update balances in JIRA issues.
The Butchers of Jarfile were to build The Juggler, an automation that should be able to receive a parquet file with an insertion plan and asynchronously update the JIRA API with scores of concurrent requests.
The Smooth Witcher, proud of his new lead, was to build The Oracle Watch, an order that would guard the Oracle (DB) at the Temple of Cash-Flow and report every qualifying transaction to parquet files in AWS S3. The Data would then be pushed to cross The Event Bridge into The Cluster of Sparks and Storms.
This Witcher Who Writes is to ride the Elephant of Hadoop into The Cluster of Sparks an Storms, to weave the signs of Map and Reduce and with speed and precision transform The Data into The Insertion Plan.
However, how exactly is The Data to be transformed is not yet known.
Will the Witchers be able to build The Data's New Path? Will they figure out the mysterious transformation? Will they discover the Undocumented Java Tool's secrets on notifying customers and aggregating data?
This story is still afoot. Only the future will tell, and I will keep you posted.6 -
Super trivial but who ships a laptop to a new employee with random software on that is clearly for their own preferences? I don't use classic shell, I don't like classic shell, and it hugely fucked with both my opinion of the new place (an IT company, ffs) and my estimation of the person who configured it. Do whatever shit you must on your own machine but get out of my way and let me use the fucking os without more pointless shit! I wouldn't do this to you, no matter how much I might love some obscure additional layer for primarily nostalgic reasons. Raging!7
-
Ok I'm seriously getting sick of this shit, my new manager wants us to have the fucking 12 hour night shifts from the office for .....no reason??!! for her own fucking entertainment I suppose!
I knew the day would come where my happy times at the new job would be over, my target now is stay 3 more months so I've been there for at least a year then see what happens. fuck me.4 -
I only created a fucking class, a FUCKING EMPTY CLASS
Cancel button does nothing, obviously.
After 30 seconds or so, everything is back to normal. This shit reminds me of the "good old days" with Eclipse.
I hated Eclipse back then, and I fucking hate VS now14 -
Facebook is a giant piece of shit. Not only is their platform a massive contributor to mental illness, even their API's are fucking garbage. I'm trying to use their ads API and what it does is it hijacks the entire fucking request so you can't even extract data from the request after calling it. Fuck Facebook and everything they've ever "contributed" to society.5
-
I'm forced by my job to use this fucking unusable piece of horse shit also know as a Windows operating system.
And it's not only that I have experienced every fucking corner case bug that is possible to occur in our universe.
Not only that that for last 2 years I seen more blue screen than blue sky.
Not only that forced updates fucked my schedules so many times that now I'm really *afraid* to turn off my computer off because I have zero guarantee that I will be able to restart it in a reasonable amount of time.
No, neither of those broke me.
The thing that kills me everyday is, piece by piece ...
WHY THE FUCK THERE IS NO SINGLE, USEABLE, SANE TERMINAL EMULATOR ON WINDOWS
I JUST WANT TO TYPE SOME COMMANDS, COPY/PASTE TEXT AND SCROLL
IS IT TO MUCH ?????
FUCK CMD
FUCK POWERSHELL
FUCK WSL
FUCK ALL THOSE WANKY THIRD-PARTY EMULATORS
FUCK EVERY-COMMAND-LINE-REALATED THING ON WINDOWS
FUCKING USLESS SHIT
CANT EVEN DO SOME SSH COPY/PASTE SHIT
WITHOUT SOME WEIRD CHARACTERS POPING OUT EVERYWHERE.
AND FUCK THAT EVERY ONE OF THOSE MUST HAVE TOTTALY DIFFERENT SET OF KEY SHORTCUTS
AND THAT FUCKING BELL
WHY WOULD YOU EVEN PUT A FUCKING BELL SOUND AS DEFAULT SETTING ??
GO TO HELL MICROSOFT
I WANT MY LINUX BACK8 -
It's rant time again. I was working on a project which exports data to a zipped csv and uploads it to s3. I asked colleagues to review it, I guess that was a mistake.
Well, two of my lesser known colleague reviewed it and one of the complaints they had is that it wasn't typescript. Well yes good thing you have EYES, i'm not comfortable with typescript yet so I made it in nodejs (which is absolutely fine)
The other guy said that I could stream to the zip file and which I didn't know was possible so I said that's impossible right? (I didn't know some zip algorithms work on streams). And he kept brushing over it and taking about why I should use streams and why. I obviously have used streams before and if had read my code he could see that my code streamed everything to the filesystem and afterwards to s3. He continued to behave like I was a literall child who just used nodejs for 2 seconds. (I'm probably half his age so fair enough). He also assumed that my code would store everything in memory which also isn't true if he had read my code...
Never got an answer out of him and had to google myself and research how zlib works while he was sending me obvious examples how streams work. Which annoyed me because I asked him a very simple question.
Now the worst part, we had a dev meeting and both colleagues started talking about how they want that solutions are checked and talked about beforehand while talking about my project as if it was a failure. But it literally wasn't lol, i use streams for everything except the zipping part myself because I didn't know that was possible.
I was super motivated for this project but fuck this shit, I'm not sure why it annoys me so much. I wanted good feedback not people assuming because I'm young I can't fucking read documentation and also hate that they brought it up specifically pointing to my project, could be a general thing. Fuck me.4 -
Article 13 and 11 passed today. Fucking why! They ether have absolutely no brain or are sleeping on a shitload of money right now. No one wanted this. First net neutrality now fucking this. Fuck this shit.
-
How to make your employees feel like shit 101:
Continually praise a small group of people for doing something for a few days that someone else does as their full time job. Call what that team did "unlike anything else in the software development world"
I am soooo fucking pissed right now. You can guess what side of this I am on.5 -
!rant, but kinda
My new director wants to buy a solution for a portal environment that my institution currently has. I have no qualms over it. My only issue was the company that sells it to be known to provide close to 0 fucking support when shit arises.
During a presentation we were told that they were using state of the art JAVA technology to render items on the page and that their ApI was easy for devs to grasp. This caught my attention since I know of very few and obscure Java frameworks that work with frontend tech (as in, your frontend logic is legit in Java)
The sales people proceed to show us React. Obviously thinking that no one knows what REact was. The dude continues with "This is new Java tech" all proud and shit prompting me to interject that it is "Javascript" the dude brushes it away saying "same thing" to which I reply with "Negative, please make sure that you properly discern Java from Javascript since Java is to Javascript as car is to carpet, completely different environments" the dude sarcastically says that "oh well, didn't know one of the people here was more aware of our own technology than we are" to which I say "and not only that, but the final say in us adopting your tech is mine, so I would rather you keep the sarcasm and the attitude to yourself, bring in a tech person if need be and learn these distinctions since we don't work with Java"
My new director later on went to talk to me since he apparently thought that Java and JS were related in some way. I can't really fault it, last time the dude touched programming was in the early 2000s, previous boss was a C and COBOL developer, but the previous dude would ALWAYS take my word no questions ask, this dude was there asking me if I was sure that Javascript and Java were really completely different environments asking me to show him.
I do not like to be questioned. I shoot the shit here and don't really involve myself with more technical aspects under this platform unless it involves concrete architecture discussions and even there I really don't care with engaging on a forum concerning that. But concerning my job I really.......really do not like to be questioned by people that know way the fuck less than me. I started coding when I was 17, I am 30 now, with a degree and years of experience. I really hate to be questioned by this dude.3 -
Stories from Gary #000
Short background info:
So I'm working as a game dev for 3 years now and by now I can say that I've seen some shit. Mostly because of one of our game designers, let's call him Gary.
So Gary, from here on called GDG (Game Designer Gary), is a regular game designer (GD). His job is to come up with new game ideas, commission the assets, make sure that translations are done, etc. - simply put, he has to get a lot of shit together before we can start working on a new game.
Would be no problem at all if GDG wasn't lazy as shit and would work for once in his life. No dev really wants to work with him anymore, since he's known for calling a game or any issue "ready for development" even if half the assets or specs are still missing.
Let's move on to a particular situation that happened a couple of months ago.
I had an issue assigned to me, which was about implementing the translations for a new game. As I read the issue and checked if everything I needed was given, I noticed that the most important part was in fact missing - the keywords for the translations.
-.-
So, I called GDG and asked where I could find the keywords, to which he responded "Oh, I'm working on them right now... and by the way I got a weird bug with the translation program. Can you come check it out?". Sigh. I went over to his office, rambling about how I should be able to help him with a program I rarely use and which was written ages ago.
As soon as GDG saw me coming roundbthe corner, he started explaining how the keywords aren't ready yet, since the program to create translations and their keywords won't let him name a translation.
"I can create new translations, but I can't assign a keyword to them."
"Okay, show me what you did", I told him, eager to leave.
He started to type the keyword, which turned out to be huge ass long and immediately I noticed a little counter, like "x/50", directly beneath the text field started to count up with every new character GDG typed. See where I'm going with this? HE WASNT ABLE TO RENAME A TRANSLATION BECAUSE HE WAS TOO LAZY TO FUCKING READ AND CONCENTRATE FOR ONCE. Sorry for that, but even thinking about it gets me angry again.
To some this might sound like nothing, but it really got to me at this point. Maybe it will become more understandable as I post more GDG stories.
tl;dr: A 40 something year old man, who's been working in his job for over 10 years wasn't able to use a program which he daily uses and asks me for help, only to find out he's a complete dipshit.4 -
So, my wife got this new PR job where she sometimes gets called in the middle of the fucking night because some jackoff in Singapore said or did some shit.
Since "husbands that work deep into the night get cheated on by their wives", and I believe in equal gender rights, I thought it would be a good opportunity to watch the new episode of the series we watch together. By my fucking self.
Is that how it feels to cheat on someone?1 -
Everything about the company is a mess. The only thing that is decent is the people. And by that I mean they aren't shit.
Workflows are fucked.
Clients are fucked. You're pressuring me to get this shit production ready before new year's eve and you still don't know what the text should say and want to make changes to the UI? The fuck?!
Design is a complete shit show. There is a design team. They only make a fucking psd to show clients how an interface would look like. No mobile version (but it's still expected to work!), no markup. Resolution is fucking inconsistent and whenever a change is requested, they are nowhere to be seen so I have to actually do designing on top of having to use this worthless fucking framework I hate it so much.
Codebases are turbo-fucked because of said framework.
Databases are an inconsistent, fucked up mess. No foreign key constraints because every single fucking table is using the MyISAM engine.
And the thing that really makes me incredibly angry is all the "custom systems" look the fucking same at the database level. Like 30 fucking useless tables made for stupid HR workflows that make no fucking sense.1 -
I FUCKING HATE VISUAL STUDIO BECAUSE IT LITERALLY THINKS I WANT TO UNDO SINCE I PRESSED THE MOTHER FUCKING BACKSPACE KEY
ITS NOT MY KEYBOARDS FAULT ITS LITERAALLY THEIR DUMBASSES NOT KNOWING HOW TO MAKE AN IDE ATA ALL
HOLY SHIT MICROSOFT LEARN HOW TO MAKE BETTER IDES OTHER THAN YOUR SHITTY IDE16 -
FUCKING MICROSOFT IIS SHIT.
I'm a .NET dev since 13 years and EVERY FUCKING TIME STUPID IIS MOTHERFUCKER AND STUPID WINDOWS SERVER have a different problem setting up because of some permission.
You can't never get a site up in IIS without loosing time and patience having weird 400/500.x errors because every fucking machine have to set up some tweaky and hidden permissions.
I have 2 identical fucking win servers and deploying a .NET core applications and on one works (test server) and obviously, on the production server it gives troubles.
FUCK YOU MICROSOFT FUCK YOU I would take the IIS devs personally here and whip them to death until they don't resolve the fucking thing4 -
Holy retarded internet company. The fiber cable that comes from the power pole lost its connection to the building I live in. So the fiber was laying on the ground in the parking lot. The upside is it is still working. The problem is people are going to run over the fiber and break it. So I sent an email to the ISP on Thursday. They didn't create a ticket all day on Friday. By the time I got home they were not open. I called their tech support number and pressed 0 until I got a real person. I explained they need to fix this soon or it will get broken. They said "I understand" and then proceeded to create a ticket for fucking wednesday next week! I told them it will damaged by then. They said "I understand". Then I get a text saying they will do this wednesday. No you stupid fuckers, you do not understand!
Queue the McGuiver music:
I got out some steel wire I use to fix stupid shit like this. I made a hook to connect the steel cable holding the fiber. This hook will go around some exposed electrical conduit. Then I got a board to lift it up high (no ladder and 5 inches thick of ice on ground). I cannot balance wire hook on board and get it to slip down. So I got a steel pole I have and attached another hook with electrical tape. As I passed the hook over the conduit I used other pole to grab bottom of hook and pull it down to keep a hold of the conduit. Now the fiber is up in the air again above the parking lot. I hope this stupid hack works until wednesday. My right arm hurts like hell cause the strain of holding the fiber taut while I pulled the hook down. It strained my right hand.
Worst customer service on the planet with Century Stink. They fucking make it harder than hell to get help and it seems they take almost a week to fix shit.4 -
Why the fuck is the master almost constantly broken? And not even "some feature I'm working on doesn't work"-broken but "can't build this shit"-broken. What the fuck is the workflow here that it's apparently acceptable? I wasn't able to do SHIT today because of it. Almost whole fucking day wasted.4
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I swear the amount of self proclaimed "i am the top 1%, i figured out the system" bullshit social medias has enabled, makes me sick down to my core.
STFU you fucking retard, how the fuck do you manage to be this stupid and retarded you waste of space trash, when you have access to the internet with a lot unlimited information, how the fuck do you manage to come out with such idioicy bullshit:
"moon landing was fake, the moon is made out of cheese, vaccines injects pest, you are being controlled and brainwashed by tv waves"
Of cause you without any education and being jobless are smarter than scientists, astronauts, rocket scientists, doctors, military personnel and experts etc.
I swear comment sections where every idiot can say anything they want (specially on news related things like videos and articles) are unbearable and i simply ending up being dumber by reading them. And yes i useually read comments, in the hope of finding decent comments, so i hear other opinions etc about something.
This is in no way a rant about i find myself smart or shit like that, since i am useually wrong about a lot of things.
I just lost it and got tired of all that retarded bullshit idiocy mixed with fake news and conspiracy thories bullshit. People who are spreading that garabage trash, are completely worthless toxic waste.4 -
So about two months ago in my consulting firm I was asked to replace a colleague on a project (node and Angular). The project is only a few months old but it’s already a total clusterfuck. DB is very poorly designed. It’s supposed to be a relational database but there’s not a trace of a foreign key or any key for that matter and I’ve seen joins like tableA.name = tableB.description (seriously, that’s your relation??). The code is a mess with entire blocks of code copied from another project and many parts of the code aren’t even used. He didn’t even bother renaming variables so they would make sense in the context they were shamelessly thrown into. The code is at best poorly typed if not typed at all.
During our dailies I sometimes express my frustration with my other colleagues as I very politely allude to my predecessor’s code as being hard to work with. (They are all “good friends" with him). I always get the same response from my colleagues: "yeah but you’ve gotta understand Billybob was under a lot of pressure. The user stories were not well defined. He didn’t have time to do a proper job". That type of response just makes me boil inside.
Because you think I have time to deal with this shit? You don’t think I’m working with the same client and his user stories that are barely intelligible? How long does it take to write type definitions for parameters going into a function? That’s right, 30 seconds at most? Maybe a minute if it’s a more elaborate object? How much time do you think you’ll save yourself with a properly typed function or better yet an interface? Hard to tell but certainly A LOT MORE than those 30 seconds you lost (no, the 30 seconds you INVESTED) in writing that interface!!!
FUCK people with their excuses! Never tell me you don’t have time to do a proper job! You’ve wasted HOURS of my time just because you were too fucking lazy to type your functions, too lazy to put just a little more thought into designing your tables, too lazy to rename a variable so that it’s name actually makes sense where it’s being used. It’s not because you were short on time. You’re just lazy!
FUCK!!!!!!4 -
"And in a stunning turn of events, he got it to work!"
But seriously... I've literally been throwing shit at a wall and seeing what would stick.
Fucking DTOs and getting shit out of a database. I need better resources on how to do this properly!
Anyways, I found that just using 'object' and letting the compiler deal with the rest of the bullshit actually allowed my code to work and run. I'm still a little in shock.
I'm over here trying to keep things in a nice one-to-one because that's what my PM recommended... and instead I just get slammed by Type casting nonsense and more errors than I can begin to understand. And unfortunately, Stackoverflow is of no help because everyone's issues are very nuanced and unrelated to my problem... Maybe I'm the problem? 🤷
But here it is working without all that bullshit. I don't know man... This code base is not the rager I was expecting. I'm getting my ass kicked with code that doesn't fall in line with the book I'm learning from.
You know how they say, "forget everything you've read and learned"? I'm feeling that really hard right now.
Constantly fighting the urge to rip everything down and do it based on what my book is recommending, but then the logical natured side of me is like "you ain't got that kind of time to be unfucking someone's work, only to get caught in more trouble. Your ego is not worth it"
Anyways, it's fucking late here and I'm glad enough to not have to think about this issue anymore. Bye.3 -
My biggest problem with Visual Studio Code is that every fucking piece of shit dev thinks it's their duty to introduce it to me. STOP. Just stop this shit, alright? Wanna use vscode? Fine, just don't tell me it's the best tool and I MUST use it instead of the tools I'm used to. I'm tired of this bullshit.
Every new project, every new team. Starting from js/java/.net monke and ending with PMs, I must hear this bullshit about god blessed IDE that I must use, because "why you need intellij/webstorm/rider? just install vscode and some plugins. we all use it in our project and it's ok".
FUCK YOU! Refactoring is not just renaming variables and extracting blocks of code into functions. If you want terminal integrated into your text editor with highlighting and LSP support, so be it. I want an IDE with rich refactoring tools, code analysis and good completion, database viewing/modeling support, good build tools support, good UI for git and git-diff, good test and code coverage support. I don't want your semi-IDE, bloated with hundreds of bugged third-party plugins, which I must spend a week on to configure and merry with each other before using.
JUST STOP this crap and let people use the tools they are proficient/comfortable/productive with.18 -
I'm fucking tired of putting my efforts into bug fixes.
5 years of web. I never had a client that likes to keep it's crappy slow piece of shit product on the market in the exact same way it is.
If they didn't sell it to state employees (and good luck for them if they do not use it) their product would be dead.
That's the only way they get money: bids. And the minimum a state pays is 15 MILLION.
And they don't have 90K to pay another dev to help creating a new product.
Their CEO fucking REJECTS anything that's not a bug fix. Once he said to our PM:
"It's pretty and more fast, but wasn't this way that made me rich"
I'm thinking I'm getting another client, seriously. Everyday the same thing breaks and they already know the fucking answer:
WE NEED TO FUCKING REFACT
CREATE A NEW FUCKING PROJECT
This shit is making crazy. I can't sleep. I can't eat and I'm always fucking tired, no matter what I do.
I need to stop working for Brazilians.
I'll try US, Canada or somewhere in Europe.8 -
DNS is everywhere.
I hate DNS.
I hate DNS migrations.
I hate having a hundred plus DNS names inside my brain.
I hate resolving issues.
I hate DNSSEC.
I hate CNAMES.
I hate services which cannot be persuaded to stop trying AAAA resolves first.
I hate the fucking stupid braindead idea to use TXT as a configuration store inside DNS... And thus the necessity to blow up DNS query size aka EDNS.
I really really really really really want to burn this whole mfucking shit down...5 -
We had only one product UX designer in our team.
She quit and I habe accelerated my job hunt.
And when I quit too, the tech team will collapse with both of us gone.
Because then there will be no product manager and no designer, only tech who is arrogant and cocky to even built a simple button to refresh the fucking page.
God bless with this fucking tech team. The Tech Senior leadership is shit. They deserve it, but for now, it's us who are facing challanges.2 -
Follow up to my other rant https://devrant.com/rants/4994932/...
I have finally fixed the bug i couldnt fix for over several weeks. I was just missing a fucking if statement check. Not expecting this to work, i compiled, tested and it worked perfectly on the first fly.
Immediately i shit you not have i broken down crying. Sobbing in tears. Uncontrollably crying down on my table for several minutes and cant refocus to continue coding. I have NEVER cried because of a fucking bug fix! But i have also NEVER had a problem so much difficult that i needed several weeks to fix it!
..1 -
Brazilian health ministry got a ransomware attack this night.
Why? Not because every city is demanding you to show you're vaccinated in order to go somewhere. Because you have to show it using a 20+ year old system.
Don't get me wrong the UI is nice.
But the servers...
Well, at least I have a document where my shots are registered.
And good luck to us living in this country, where we're known for gorgeous cities (people too) but also for a government that earns 200k+ while working 2 days a week and can employee 40+ people for sitting there and do no fucking shit.
No wonder if you get bad news from here every now and then, it's all true.
The ministries are dumb.
The president is dumb.
And worst. People too.
People don't care. Because they don't know they are part of 94% of more than 200 MILLION that earns minimum wage and strive to live bc the country BUYS things that we ALREADY PRODUCE and have to put a tax to every product to compensate them paying 5x times more to buy in dollars.
Well,
At least I'm not depending on this sucker of government, never cared about it.
You guys deserve to collapse and become poor again6 -
My LinkedIn is usually pretty quiet. Recently I've received quite a few messages from recruiters. Some of them put numbers in and I look at them, well, the market looks hot.
I like where I am but doesn't hurt to have a look around eh? So I went through some interviews and shit. No preps, not trying to please anyone, being completely honest. And out of the 3 I tried, 1 got to the final round.
Before the final round, the recruiter kept harassing me (it's their job really) about what my "bottom line" is. She said they really liked me but I'm not up to their expectation as a senior role. So they want to proceed with a non-senior role, then climb my ladder up. I told her, I don't give a shit about the title. The she said for that, the salary will be "adjusted" (reads reduced). I told her, look, I said I wouldn't bother if the offer is anything less than X amount of money. Then she said but this company would offer 10% bonus, which will add up , mind you, "close to" X. She said she wanted to know so we don't waste the director's time (as the final round is to meet the bloody director).
I said, if I need to disclose my bottom line before going to this, which is pretty much my negotiation, then let's call it off. No point wasting my time either.
The next day I received the last call from her. They fucked right off.
I know everyone here already knows. But let me experience be another example of how a plague recruiters is. I don't have any experience like this before but this is probably a fucking lowball case too.4 -
I think the sleep deprived me is finally cracking under the weight of incompetent assholes.
We just launched a major project in some weird cocktail of Agile slapped with MVP and release to the wild in a waterfall, but it was premature, premature in the sense QA hasn't even finished their side of things, but because some fuck with with "manager" in their title decided they have burnt through the budget with incompetence and scrapped an entire element of the project and outsourced just so they could make a shittier version that doesn't even fucking work.
How hard do you want to fail before you will start listening to the people that now have to work around the fucking clock to clean up this horse shit of a mess.
I'm literally arguing over field mapping with multiple 3rd parties, when the fucking requirements state WTF this is suppose to look like. All because they didn't validate or test their own shit.
Why is EVERY FUCKING cock head in this industry a waste of space and cash! Is it really to much to ask for 1 fucking project to fucking go live that actually fucking works where I don't need to work 2 weeks straight (including weekends) after going live just to be sure that what shit does hit the fan isn't going to create a SEV 1 issue...
Sorry, I'm pissed at the incompetence of others I need to deal with on a daily basis. It's not like this field is insanely hard. A little attention to detail and self validation, verification goes a long way. But clearly that's a rarity.
Once this shit is stable and actually works, I'll be pulling out the mop to clean up half this shit just so it actually works.
Oof, I'm getting to old for this bullshit.4 -
It's funny how you start feeling bad for the next dev taking over your project because it turned into a total spaghetti code shit show that will be impossible to maintain in the future with new features coming in.
Honestly... if a projects starts out with a certain scope which then gets extended EVERY FUCKING WEEK with requirements that can't even be met in the initial timeframe it's no wonder the code quality will decrease over time.
This just reminds me daily how important good project management (and I'm not talking about suit wearing pain-in-the-ass-managers) and the inclusion of devs in the planning process really is.
It's so fucking crazy that companies run like that with people up front that have NO FUCKING CLUE what they are doing, nor do they understand the mechanics, tech and effort that go into certain features. They're like "beep, boop, it's done by Friday you fuck!".
The funniest part of this stupid charade is that the closer we get to a new "deadline" (we will not meet the deadline anyways) the more nervous the "managers" get. WHY didn't you properly plan this shit in the first place? WHY didn't you care for the last six months where all this fucking bullshit could still have been prevented?
Meanwhile I'm just so sick and tired of this shitty project and this sucky company that I just don't have any motivation left to keep on working. It's so fucking hard and painful to work on projects that suck ass, are poorly designed. I just got to the point where coding is no fun any more. Thank god I'm out of here soon... fml5 -
Def not dev oriented.
I am a huge fan of trading card games. It started with Yu Gi Oh, moved on to Magic, even tried, LoTR when it was a thing, tried algo Star Wars the original CCG (loved it), Duel Masters (when it was still in the U.S) Pokemon (of fucking course) and other more uncommon ones like Cardfight Vanguard, tried latino only games (Mitos y leyendas, Myths & Legends, this one is king on my list) and Flesh & Blood. But as a mexican kid, I was always a fan of fucking dragon ball, like most mexican kids.
SO I bought some cards from the newest game expansion. the owner of the TCG/anime store told me that if I was willing to play that I should hang out on tuesdays.
So, learning the rules of the game, and wanting to play with other people, I went there on a tuesday.
The MTG people were there fighting amongst themselves for some reason. the Pokemon people were there also, just opening packs without playing. A rather large table was there with a bunch of people playing a game that I did not recognize. And then there was me. I was chilling on my phone thinking that the DB dudes would show up eventually. nothing, so I just sat there waiting.
Suddenly a dude comes to the large table and starts pairing people for a "tournament" and once they are all sited he notices that 1 is missing, he walks up to me holding a store app and asks me "sorry bro, are you here to play with us by any chance?" to which I say "I do not think so, I came here for DB but I don't know what you guys are playing"
The dude looks down on his app, somehow actually sad and says "man I do play DB, but I don't think I have my cards with me, maybe, let me see" and he goes on to see if he brought something.
This was green flag n 1. the dude wanted to just play something with someone. And was doing something to not LEAVE someone behind. then quick as hell another says "well, why don't we give him a deck and he can play with us! we can teach him!" and I say "well what are you lads playing?" and he says "digimon man you like the anime? a new release came about! it's sick man it would be awesome if you play!"
Second green flag, another member of that community was happy for the idea of increasing the membership and actively did something to increase the population.
So, I hanged out with them. Close knit group, all friends from a long time, but willing to take an unfamiliar (and rather handsome) face with them.
My face when (MFW) the DB dudes where not there, so the digimon group adopted me.
I know have over.....2000 cards, most of them were gifted to me by them after they saw my chops and tough me how to play, by graciously lending me their decks.
This my lads, is what humanity is about. We got close fast, it has been 2 weeks of just chilling with them at the game lounge, just nice people, all of them really. Not a single angry moment or anything, you pull a crazy combo on them and they legit sheeeeeeeesh and applaud them, they don't care about loosing, they just want to have a good time, and this, this is a good crowd to be at.
Strive to make people feel welcomed. Being nice to others, taking a chance on people you deem to be ok, is fine really. It is rather cool. Anyone can be a salty asshole, but it takes a real king to be nice to others just for the sake of having a good time.
These dudes, they are gold. And I finally have something to take my mind away from work and other things that increase my anxiety and stress. I would much rather be there shooting the shit with the lads and playing games than at home, drinking the night away to relieve stress.
Kings5 -
...another (probably about fourth) completely futile attempt at making MASM compiling pipeline work...
...what the fuck... seriously, i've spent together about two weeks of time trying to make a fucking default hello world compile... ml64 problems, then rc.exe problems, apparently i was missing some dumb CommonService.dll which not only doesn't exist anywhere on my computer, but it doesn't even seem to exist at all in this fucking dimension. After several hours I had the bright idea of "fuck MS rc, let's just grab any other random resource compiler that I can find, and see if that one works".
Funnily enough, it does. Except Visual MASM can't run it from it's build process because it fucks up the commandline call, so I need to run it manually, and then when I run the build from V-MASM, the rc call still fails, but then it checks for the resulting .res file and finds it, so it happily continues with success...
...and now fuckin... what even is it? *goes to check*
oh yeah, now linker is shitting itself:
LINK : fatal error LNK1104: cannot open file 'user32.lib'
And I'm just completely defeated, just searching system-wide for the lib intending to copy it into the linker folder because fuck this fucking bullshit, I've had enough of drowning in MS BuildTools versions and installations and uninstallations and fixes and modifys and repairs and all that FUCKING BULLSHIT.
HOW. THE. FUCK. is this in any way usable for anyone. I suspect nobody ever actually tried to build an assembler project in the last 30 years, so nobody noticed it DOESN'T. FUCKING. WORK.
THIS.
THIS is why I hate anything that's not a proper IDE where I install ONE thing, and do everything in that ONE IDE and let IT figure out all this linuxy-soft-coupled bullshit of twentyfuckingthousand fucking useless commandline apps threwn around the whole fucking system where I'm fucking supposed to know where the fuck what is and which version and GO FUCK YOURSELF.
GIMME. FUCKIN. ONE: IDE. WHICH. WILL. INSTALL. ALL. THAT. IT. NEEDS. TO. BE. FUCKING. ABLE. TO. FUCKING. WORK. AND. COMPILE. SHIT!!!
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK.10 -
FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT DOCKER LOSING ALL MY FUCKING DATA WHEN I JUST WANT TO RESET THE ROOT PASSWORD YOU PIECE OF SHIT CUNT!AAAAAAAAAAAARGHJ WHAT A SHITTY OBSCURE CONTAINERIZED PILE OF BEARSHIT15
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Fucking garbage piece of shit microsoft httpclient
identical request works in node!
identical request works in postman!
but noooooooo httpclient, you have to add the content length on the content itself, can't add authorization header except through special way, serialization is wrong bunch of shit pile of shit no working shit5 -
i dont know sql, gotta look shit up and dont much of it really internalized
i may be now being assigned somebody else's task to do some sql shit
fucking kill me4 -
Aaagh...... 2022 this year has been shity for real..
So its now 1 year and I've been a fullstack developer for this mid tech company as the only developer
so I've been trying to get these guys to hire a second developer. and try to also upgrade equipment and these guys didnt even bother to attend to my requests and during my evaluation meeting on friday these guys where down my neck about why projects are taking time to complete i MEAN WTF!!!!! told them its bcoz Im a 1 man army and most of the times Im chocked with the "any other duty" thing and how tha fuck do they expect them projects to be done on time
I'm the only developer some times i get sick 2weeks and where i left off is were i continue from and thats 2 weeks work of progress down the drain
I'm so fucking pieced off ryt now I feel like droping this shity job and find a much better organization
they want me to build them a developer department and they dont even equip me with the necessary tools to do so WTF do they think they are doing they think they know better than me?
so let them build their fucking dev department without me
this has been a fucking stressful experiance
wrote them a later to hire a second developer
I dont fucking care how they are going to do it
contracting or an internal dev if they dont in the next 3 months I fucking leaving this shit7 -
There are a couple:
A system that updates user accounts to connect them into our wifi system by parsing thousands of processing files written in Clojure. The project was short lived and mainly experimental, It has complete test cases and the jar generated from it is still purring silently on the main application. It was used to replace an $85k vendor application that made no fucking sense. The code has not been touched in 2 years and the jar is still there. The dba mentioned the solution to the vendor, the vendor tried buying it from me, but being that it belongs to the institution nothing was touched, still, it got the VP's attention that I can make programs that would be bought for that level, it caught his attention even more when I showed him the codebase and he recognized a Lisp variant (he is old, and was back in the day a Fortran and Cobol developer)
A small Python categorical ML program that determines certain attributes of user generated data and effectively places them on the proper categories on the main DB. The program generates estimates of the users and the predictions have a 95% correctness rate. The DBA still needs to double check the generated results before doing the db updates. I don't remember how I coded it because I was mostly drunk when I experiment on the scenario. It also got the attention of the VP and director since the web tech manager was apparently doing crazy ML shit that they were not expecting me to do, it made them paranoid that I would eventually leave for a ML role somewhere, still here, but I want more moneys!!
A program that generates PDF documentation from user data, written in Go, Python and Perl (yes Perl) I even got shit from the lead developer since I used languages outside of their current scope of work. Dude had no option but to follow along with it :P since I am his boss
Many more. I am normally proud of my work code. But my biggest moment is my current ntural language processing unit that I am trying to code for my home, but I don't have enough power to build it with my computers, currently, my AI is too stupid, but sometimes it does reply back to my commands and does the things I ask it to do (simple things, opening a browser, search for a song etc) but 7 times out of ten it wont work :P -
Confession: I don't feel like working. At all. I'm so in need of a vacation. I spend 3/5 days gaming at home and do my sprint assignments in the last two, because I'm so fucking good at what I do. Been working like this for weeks now.
Last summer vacation I really had was fucked up by a PO calling me about the project expectations wanting me to really explain the technical decisions to stakeholders, because the schedule kept getting shorter and that caused me huge amounts of anxiety. I left the company next year. They even contacted me later asking if I had any interest coming back. No fucking chance.
Didnt have any vacation days for last summer. Now I'm in a really nice position where I don't have to really give a shit about the project I'm working on so I can just ignore work completely during my vacation. Gonna delete my email from my phone and disconnect Slack. Fuck work.4 -
Nothing gets on my nerve than microsoft. Just another day being a victim of fucking microsoft trash product called teams. All I wanted to do was login but no, this ass of a product has it's own shit things.3
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Any night, 1:30am, bedtime: "Yes! I can't WAIT for tomorrow to begin! I'm gonna make SO much progress on that personal project that I just KNOW is gonna change the world and make me a billionaire! My time is now!"
Next day, 9am, first call of the day: "Ugh, waking up SUUUUUCKS! But, fine, just gotta get through the workday, then it's beast mode time!"
5pm: "Ugh, that day SUCKED... meeting after meeting, constant interruptions for the few minutes I got to hack code, SO many emails, and hey, good day, only five new things pushed down from corporate to bang my head against! Feelings pretty mentally exhausted, but it's all good, I fortunately love this programming stuff, so first dinner, then a little exercise, spend some time with the family, and then it's time to COOOODE!"
10pm: "Ok, house is FINALLY quiet (fucking dog), just a little noise from my daughter staying up way too late again... kinda spent, but this project still excites me, and I may not get as much done as I was hoping, but fine, I can still make some tangible progress and that's what matters. Maybe just one last quick check of email, Reddit, make sure there's no new Hot Ones or Honest Trailers I gotta watch, update IDEA plugins and see what's new, then it's work time! Nothing can stop me now!"
Any night, 1:30am, bedtime: "SHIT! I GOT FUCK ALL DONE AGAIN! GO DAAAAAAAMN IIIIIT!!!!"3 -
So this might be a very long post , but i am sure most of you can relate to it .
So , the year end . Time of joy and appraisals right?You have slogged your ass off the entire year and are expecting amazing ratings.Then boom , your piece of shit sadist manager starts of his review by saying 'there are worrysome things to discuss' after not saying shit for the entire year . I am pretty new to corporate , in fact 1 year old , still managed to handle devops for a team of 130+ , majority of whom have no work apart from playing a blame game and indulging in cheap politics. I mean , bro , I am literally your son's age , i dont see the point in playing this cheap shit with me.On top of that this sadist and borderline piece of shit manager has the audacity to say that I did not raise any blockers , while I have CCed him in every fucking mail possible.How big of an a****** can you be bro?
I counter his points for 40 45 mins straight ,leaving him stuck without words for solid 10 to 15 seconds many times during the 'review meet'. This guy is in the same place working on the same shit code , which 90% of this community can't even think of. Every thing is bloody manual and apparently ' I should have tried to streamline the entire f**** process' . Cool bro , why not open a startup while I am at it ?
Then this piece of poop gives me a rating which is just above the inconsistent performer bracket :) .
I just dont get the points what do these people get by giving shit ratings and not even having valid points to back up their fuck all arguments.This guy , throughout the duration of the call did not say 1 (bloody 1 ) good thing about my efforts. Past context is majority of the smart people who were literally running their pods single handedly , were under him and were fed up with not getting hikes and appraisals.Apart from me ,everyone resigned and left with hikes as high as 50% (LOL right).
But I have a year of experience and its really difficult to perform well in 4 rounds of bs compititive coding rounds, after which I get the generic ' oh you did well bro but we are moving on with other candidates' (FFS) .
I pray that even my worst enemies don't get such managers and I hope he rots in hell.
Amen and sorry for the cussing :) -
Today I could finally spend some time reviewing the merge requests an intern made (and I occasionally helped).
My god, I want to put it this months amount of work an, put it in a trash, burn it and rewrite it before the fire is gone.
5 small and unrelated issues. The intern used branches with the correct naming scheme, but IT'S A FUCKING STRAIGHT LINE BUILDING ON TOP OF EACHOTHER.
Oh ans also they took the liberty to update the dependencies and the language versions used. There was no issue regarding this. It's the first branch in the line and it was called "update_<dependency>" where they just upped the version numbers of everything and then COMMENT OUT all mentions of <dependency> so that it compiles at the very least.
Now today I spend most of my time reviewing the code by fixing that mess. Thanks to updates I had to update the CI and replace some libraries that are now incompatible. Tomorrow I can finally inspect the shit itself.
On a positive side node, I removed node as a dev dependency and the size of the node modules went down from 128mb to 18mb4 -
The person who invented powerpoint and those who use it/love it should be skinned alive.
FUCKING SHIT OF A PRODUCT.
On the other side, instead of torturing someone to death, force them to use Power point for 2 hours a day and that will be enough for the person to beg you to kill them.
Join me in this journey against power point.21 -
Man I am tired of my company's dogshit software release process.
We have to commit to fucking estimates for 6 months (2 quarters), SQA shadowing dev by 2 weeks, and freaking estimates and work done at the end are not even close. And then we call it a minor release. These shitty estimates are based on requirements that basically say "we want feature x, plz make it work". It's some fucked up agilefall garbage that does not work for shit.
We rush like motherfuckers during the final weeks because estimates are bullshit but we are still expected to be done with every story points which somehow are days instead of other better metrics.
I swear this fucking bullshit has been designed by the board so they could plan their money entries based on the software release.
The only reason this company actually still holds itself up is because the engineers are good at their job.
Go fuck yourself high management. -
*laughing maniacally*
Okidoky you lil fucker where you've been hiding...
*streaming tcpdump via SSH to other box, feeding tshark with input filters*
Finally finding a request with an ominous dissector warning about headers...
Not finding anything with silversearcher / ag in the project...
*getting even more pissed causr I've been looking for lil fucker since 2 days*
*generating possible splits of the header name, piping to silversearcher*
*I/O looks like clusterfuck*
Common, it are just dozen gigabytes of text, don't choke just because you have to suck on all the sucking projects this company owns... Don't drown now, lil bukkake princess.
*half an hour later*
Oh... Interesting. Bukkake princess survived and even spilled the tea.
Someone was trying to be overly "eager" to avoid magic numbers...
They concatenated a header name out of several const vars which stem from a static class with like... 300? 400? vars of which I can make no fucking sense at all.
Class literally looks like the most braindamaged thing one could imagine.
And yes... Coming back to the network error I'm debugging since 2 days as it is occuring at erratic intervals and noone knew of course why...
One of the devs changed the const value of one of the variables to have UTF 8 characters. For "cleaner meaning".
Sometimes I just want to electrocute people ...
The reason this didn't pop up all the time was because the test system triggered one call with the header - whenever said dev pushed changes...
And yeah. Test failures can be ignored.
Why bother? Just continue meddling in shit.
I'm glad for the dev that I'm in home office... :@
TLDR: Dev changed const value without thinking, ignoring test failures and I had the fun of debunking for 2 days a mysterious HAProxy failure due to HTTP header validation... -
I fucking hate managers who go out spouting things have gone to shit and production is broken, when a single feature is missing from the application. It's your fault for not making sure the specifications were correct or not testing in QA before going to production! Just because one minor feature is missing does not mean production is broken you dimwit! It just means you suck at your job and we have to fix your fuck ups. It would also be really helpful if you morons accepted the fact that the teams want to do daily releases and continuous development, instead of having to deal with your insanity of pushing releases to a specific date so we have everything ready from marketing to Steve the janitor2
-
"Pay more attention to the house"
Oh, really?
I'm working here!
Why every non tech person acts like I'm doing no fucking shit all day?
These types of things makes me want open my own fucking office.5 -
We write our feature specifications in Gherkin, so it is clear to every member of the team (even nondevs GASP!) exactly what each feature should do.
SO WHY THE FUCK, AFTER BUILDING THE FEATURE, DO I GET REVIEWS FROM THE pRoDuCt MaNaGeRs, SHOWING ME THEY WANT SOMETHING DIFFERENT FOR THE FEATURE. YOU WROTE THE FUCKING FEATURE DID YOU HAVE A CHANGE OF HEART MID THOUGHT YOU IDIOT!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I'M SO SICK OF IT I'M SICK OF WORKING 12 HOURS ON A FRIDAY FOR YOUR STUPID SHIT2 -
polymorphic relationships are fucking stupid. it's a great way to make your shit more complex and less maintainable for no benefit other than having 1 less table (which also makes queries slower since they can't be optimized correctly).3
-
Worst: forced to work for 9 months on a shitty wp theme:
- colleague with no clue trying to make me do their work… check
- incompetent manager doing shit about it… check
- idiotic pipeline requiring to redeploy for every asset update… check
- micromanaging cto which for some fucking reason didn’t want to allow access to the writers, forcing the role of content editor on the devs… ducking check! Quack!!
Best: automated lots of processes in my free time, all stuff which I can reuse! -
At my new internship I am have to work in Magento. I come to FUCKING hate it.
From the phtml files, the choice between caching or having to wait 20 fucking seconds for a page reload to the huge file structure and the "documentation".
The whole fucking thing is a mess with a shit load of bugs and confusing git tickets that never seem to be added as updates!!!
Fucking hate this shit -
YouTube Music is so fucking shit
No continue playing on refresh. Queue / Currently playing gets cleared (Wtaf?)
No logical playlist sorting by alphabet
Alphabetical order seems to restart several times and gets fucky with mixed starting letters towards the end
Absolutely no sorting options by any attribute
No continue listening on another device
No song search ability in playlists (Excuse me but what the fuck?)
SS attached shows how playlist goes from W -> Y -> axbyz2 -
I don't know if on the outside it seems like I know my shit and I know what I'm doing or not, but on the inside, I have no fucking idea what I'm doing. I'm just going with my gut and hoping for the best and I don't know if people are actually falling for that or not.3
-
FUCK YOU PHP, FUCK YOU SYMFONY AND DEFINITELY FUCK YOU SHOPWARE.
Don't get me wrong, PHP has evolved a lot, but the stuff people are building with it is just the biggest load of fucking shit I have ever seen: Shopware. Shopware is the most ass-sucking abomination to extend. It's nearly impossible to develop anything beyond "use the standard features and shut the fuck up" that is more sophisticated than a fucking calculator.
The architecture of this pile of crap is the worst bullshit ever. A mix of OOP, randomly making use of non OOP concepts and features together with the unnecessarily HUGE amount of useless interfaces and classes. Sometimes I feel like it's 90% fucking shitty boilerplate shit.
And don't get me started with TWIG. It's a nice thought, but WHY THE BLOODY FUCK WOULD YOU NOT USE VUE IF YOU ARE ALREADY USING IT FOR A DIFFERENT PART OF SHOPWARE. This makes no fucking sense whatsoever and makes development of new features a huge pain in the ass. I can't comprehend how people actually like using this shit.
OH AND THE DATABASE. OH MY FUCKING GOD. This one is bad. Ever tried to figure anything out in a database where random strings (yes MySQL "relational" - you might think) that are stored as text in a JSON format make up some object or relations during runtime?? Why the fuck do you have foreign and primary keys if you don't use them properly??
Seriously you can't even figure out which data belongs to what because the architecture just sucks fucking ass. FUCK YOU Shopware wankers, you suck, your product sucks, your support sucks, your architecture sucks and you keep releasing new versions that regularly break shit even in minor versions.
I used to like PHP, but not in projects like these.6 -
Dear Windows, we have to talk. I love you, you know that, and I know that your market share has been shrinking in recent years and you're shit scared of becoming irrelevant but for the love of god:
- STOP asking me every god damn few weeks if I want to change my browser settings - NO I FUCKING DONT WANT TO USE BING, FUCK OFF
- STOP trying to be like an app and add pointless new "features" that nobody cares about and just do your fucking job, which is to be a PLATFORM which is stable, never changes and that gets out of my fucking way
- STOP reinstalling apps I uninstall, Im NOT FUCKING INTERESTED IN PAINT 3D, FUCK OFF
FUCK, ME,2 -
Fuck Apache TIKA.
Its supposed to be a "universal file reader" or some shit. Im trying to use it as a PDF/image parser that does OCR when needed and yelds a full-file string. It does so, but the text ends up being IN THE WRONG FUCKING ORDER.
WTF would I want to parse the text out of a PDF in any order that is not the one the text is supposed to be read?!?!
"It is more efficient to work in random ordering", says the docs. No shit, really? Wouldn't it be even more efficient to just spit out random strings? Just as useful and 100% CPU-bound.
"You can add a property to forcefully put the text in the right order". THEN WHY THE FUCK IT IS NOT THE DEFAULT SETTING?
Srsly, what's the use case to a parser that yields scrambled text?!?1 -
ugh... another shitty day. its been 2 months since i joined this team , and i am counting the days that have not gone being shitty.
i am not doing any shit of a work, yet just sitting in front of company code and slack whole day, trying to figure out what am supposed to do and how.
- my task is currently making release of a unity sdk. i never worked on unity until 2 days ago when i gor this task.
- company laptop has a fuckin jamf with unity 2019 that won't even open properly. i raised a ticket to IT and somehow got it to update and work for my laptop after 2 days.
- now i am able to create a default project and get it to run, but now the company sdk that is supposed to be installed in a project causes the project to not build when i include it.
- other team members are being assholes. i message this guy 4 times in 10 minutes since i have no clue what to do, and this asshole replies after 6 hours, when i am having my lunch. and his reply ? "try to play around this . am working on a p1 bug so can't help now" wtf man give me something, i am stuck
- there are also issues raised on our github's page for sdk. i have no clue how our sdk works internally and yet i am expected to respond to these issues. i asked the same asshole to look onto an issue(whose reporter was nice enough to include a full stack trace and even the exact place which is causing ANR and his reply was "yeah check on this , ask the other(asshole) guy about it, he fixed ANRs before. look into the sdk, we don't need to reply on GitHub issues asap".
- the main problem here is : i have zero clue how to approach this sdk! i have implemented it completely in a sample project but the whole sdk is in java with so so many pointless (from my p.o.v) interfaces and base classes that i can't understand how to get to the bottom of it! and yet am supposed to jump into this stuff.
i hate when code feels like magic and job feels like prison janitor work. i want to get into action : add apis , build stuff , make a change , but somehow i ended up with the most boring and irritating job i could find.
i can't even just stop and work on my personal stuff because they have got jamf on this fucking laptop. us these async expectations are killing me
btw did i mention the tech lead has been having a fantastic time getting married and taking multiple vacations? yeah, that guy just took a call with me for like 3 times in last 50 days. this company is all so charming from outside : weekends off, 1/4 fridays off 3 days a week standup , but so less interactions is clearly making me , a new guy with already a very less interest in java and their various shitty sdks, very uncomfortable.2 -
any tips on how to get to liking web dev? I feel disgusted by it every time I try to learn it.
So, So much fragmentation. Everything's acceptable and the browser doesn't give any hoots about it. A particular page can have all the metadata, favicons, flintstones, metrics, bullshit with 90 attributes properly added into it by some hard-working dev and it would be acceptable by the browser.
Another page will have no shit defined, and that would also be acceptable!
CSS is holy fuck powerful. HTML has 50,000 pages of specification documents written behind it. javascript is so large, it can create both of these. the working of the browser is a different realm, the working of backend +cloud is a different dimension, the working of 3d graphics and game resumes via some crazy js package is a different reality!
It's a vast, fucking, overwhelming universe!!
I am 23, trying to make sense of this stuff for the last 8 years. To make decent little pages and tools that I can use, or the world can use, but fuck me if I even know the types and attributes of <link> element.
I have gone from being a school student to a college student to an employed profession in android dev, yet I don't understand web much
Every time i try learning it, instead of reaching my goal to create something useful, I am stuck in the stupid tutorial hell.
I can make a decent-looking resume or file-based server using various auto completions and helps from web storm, plugins, and medium articles, but I don't want to sound dumb if someone questioned me anything about this stuff, which I would sound, because i have no clue!
I love creating android apps, i don't know why. I know that some jerk is going to see my app and say "HEY STUPID. YOU DIDN'T USE PROTOBUFS OR COMPOSE, YOUR APP SUCKS", but I won't give a damn about them. because after making apps for 5 years, I don't care for newer stuff if it isn't better. I would rather spend my time making the use case work properly on user devices than caring for new shit.
It's also not like I completely ignore my knowledge growth by rejecting everything new. I transitioned from java to kotlin, from linear layouts to constraint layouts, using jetpack libraries, etc as my main tools. I know the time to transition and i also know the time when i have to learn various stuffs, in android dev
I change tools like I change my pen. Once its refill is over, but if its body is intact, I would just buy a refill and reuse it. but if its cap is lost and body is broken, i ain't getting glue and refill to fix those. i will buy a new, better pen
But on the topic of web dev, I am not like that. I can't figure out a limited set of knowledge from where I would grow on my own, i can't figure out how much to learn and where to go from that , i can't figure out anything :/
I am stuck mann17 -
Betty: Opens slack chat with Bob, Tony and me to ask me to fix some data for a client who messed the setup. (Don’t worry just building a script that takes 3 hours to complete and that I must supervise)
Betty: Opens slack chat with Ron, Tim and me to ask me to force the system I made to ignore protocol because someone else’s fuck up made it so she didn’t get the output she expected.
Betty: proceeds to ask for status updates constantly on both chats. She also disguises them as her asking what she can do to “get it across faster” knowing there’s jack shit I or anyone can do to make it go “faster”.
Also Betty, vomits BS about my micro service being unstable in front of managers even though it is it’s correctness what brought to light a bug fucking up thousands of records silently.
Go fuck yourself Betty ☺️ and fuck the client5 -
!dev
God I’m having the hardest time focusing on my task, it just seems so inconsequential compared to the shit going on in the world.
Here in my own country we’ve got issues with the government and their desperate grabs at power, citizens rights being trampled all over as if they mean nothing.
Of course the conflict in Ukraine I can’t peel my eyes away from the Reddit world news feed.
The explosive inflation worrying about the cost of food fuel and rent.
Diesels not cheap, and the electric company wants to spike up the price of already over priced electricity by 10%.
I’ve got a trip coming up which I’m thankful for but it’s expensive and money isn’t getting any easier to come by.
I’m genuinely worried about what the WEF is attempting to accomplish and the amount of power they hold over the western world.
And with all that in my mind…. The work in front of me of updating this stupid game to modern standard and refactoring it to actually make sense and be maintainable… just seems so fucking pointless.1 -
Fuck it, go ruin your own life, I don't deserve this shit.
I don't deserve getting treated like shit by my mother for financially helping her, in fact, bringing all the fucking money in this household to the table.
I don't deserve being gaslighted by some hypocrite who victimized or egos themself up to fit their narrative.
Just ruin your own day, but keep me out of it. I'm tired of playing mental support just to be shit on.2 -
Seriously WTF TP-Link?
Bought an Archer T4E Wifi adapter card for my PC. This has got to be the worst piece of shit hardware ever sold.
I mean are you kidding me? This card has two TWO!! antennas sticking out of its back and won't maintain a connection to an access point that I have NO PROBLEM AT ALL connecting to with my fucking phone? And don't even try to connect to the 5G network with this embarrassment of a WIFI card.
Looking at the support forums and loads of people complain about the exact same thing without any reply from this shit company.
Seriously screw you TP-LINK I will never buy any hardware from you again.17 -
JUST FUCKING NOTHING WORKS!
ERROR HERE ERROR THERE.
Then i tried to copy the exact sample code and it ALSO DIDN'T WORK.
AND THEN FUCKING VSCODE shows errors THAT AREN'T EVEN THERE. THEY MAYBE WERE THERE 10 MINUTES AGO. IS THIS SOME FUCKING INTERNET EXPLORER SHIT. ALSO COMPILING THROUGH IT DOESN'T WORK JUST THROUGH THE COMMAND LINE. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH FUCK IT8 -
I’ve been looking for a job recently since I am a student and starting my career.
I have a bunch of experience and I like to think I have pretty broad knowledge of programming concepts (web dev, ML, AI, software development).
I see these job postings for jobs that I know I am qualified for.
- I got my research published (which is related to the jobs I’ve been applying for)
- I have great grades
- I have a clear track record of doing well in teams (life long athlete)
- I am a complete geek for new tech and libraries so I always learn them super fast
- I have side projects that aren’t just shit I’ve done in school
- my past jobs show that I am an efficient worker who has real experience
However, I always fucking fail the coding challenges.
I’m never asked questions like “how to reverse a linked list”, just obscure questions that I don’t know how to study for.
What the fuck am I supposed to do? It’s not even like I get close to the answers. I usually get a couple test cases and then fail the rest of them, or I can’t figure out a solution to solve them.
This is all really disheartening and I fucking hate it I absolutely fucking hate it and when I am trying to hire people in the future, I’m never going to make them do coding challenges bc they’re fucking stupid4 -
What the absolute fuck were you thinking Microsoft?
You're doing everything you can to ensure that those who continue to use Github are flogged and castrated?
What the fuck happened to the SSH clone link that was so easy to keep in all you had to do was *checks notes* fucking NOTHING.
It makes me question choices I have made over the last two years. Like, why don't I just host my own git server at this point? I have a couple servers running and it would cost me next to nothing.
Before anyone says anything about GitLab , I looked. I would be spending three times what I am now if I used them.
At this point it seems like a futile attempt to stay with you. I'm going to start calling you ShitHub now because it's a place where I can't get shit done without some kind of new shitty "improvement".
2022 is lining up to be a spectacular year!
Fuck you Microsoft.8 -
Product manager keeps fucking with my Jira board, changing names of tickets that he's not even the reporter of and none of his names make any sense. I keep thinking my tickets have disappeared. He doesn't understand how Jira works and confuses the shit out of me.4
-
!dev
So my company says they are paying the market rate, and I should be grateful about it. When I went for interviews at "some big companies", I got offers from 2 different companies with the annual pay x2.5 of what I am getting here.
My current company mentality is so shitty that they only want to hire undergrads or people from oversea so they can pay less.
I do not even know what my fucking role is at this point, I do DevOps, I fucking do infra, I also do SRE shit, then I also write fucking code for servers. Yet my pay is slightly less than just "dev" working at good companies. Fuck my company, I am leaving soon.
I am not the only one in the shit show here, our PM also has to write code because most of our developers left. Most of the time, CTO is not even in the office, the company is basically run by some managements below CTO.6 -
It's been a while since I ranted but goddamn people really need to work on fucking communication. Jesus Christ. Make it to the point and think about your listener's POV. God fucking damn it fuckity fuck I am so goddamn tired. 90%of the shit that comes out of their mouths have no point wasting my fucking time. What is the objective of what you're saying?
It's time for me to BOUNCEEE. -
some call
- yo bro do you have some time ?
- quick cause I'm taking a dump
- I think I have been hacked, got black screen kernel panick, linux freeze seldomly I have to reboot, no internet connexion
- save your stuff and reinstall linux
- I don't have enough stockage to backup
- Then buy one and save, probably either OS is fcked up or you have some hdd problems
Time that it will take: ~30min to reinstall whole shit
Peace duration: ~2years
Later on the same day
aunt
- I can't log into windows
- Did you change the password ?
- Yes but it does not work anymore
* looking at shit
* logs successfully. Reason: interface changed after automatic update.
* wait.
* wait some more so fucking windows fucking starts
* Desktop is ugly as fck.
* Some stupid settings messed up (like high contrast set, black theme or so)
aunt (the same)
- I can't log into my (other) laptop either
* logs
* wait more more more
Guess what: automatic updaaaates. Freezes 100%cpu
* Being a very experienced user: wait before reboot because this suckass os will probably fail to boot otherwise
* Blackscreen with a percentage: Installing updates...
* reboots
* Blackscreen with a percentage: Installing updates continuing...
* finally boot (feels like a miracle windows succeeds lol)
* still slow
aunt now sleeps
* look at running process and install programs
* sees shits like camera recognition (vendor installed), candycrush
* occasionnaly get adds
time lost: 2h
peace duration: ~3month
FFS I am a dev, not a fucking trash lover
It is already pain to fix someone os, but windows is the cream of cream
It brings no ease of use for novice user
It is so insanely slow
It has stupid settings set up by default!!!!!!!! Who FFS wants candycrush and ads
The maj are so fcking hazardous. It is 2022 pretty much the same as 15y back then. Updates take fucking eternity. And needs reboot. and are not even finished!!!
I swear I am gonna stretch my ass and install linux and any fckin other toolsuite needed so they can use Micro$$ word, which is the only fucking usecase they need windows for in the first case anyway
I SO wish this OS would die
I mean, even more than safari8 -
Once again I'm stuck in a M$ work with an shit OS that offset my time every now and then, MS Teams that doesn't pick up my headset half of the time and their stupid fucking documentation that doesn't say anything more than the code (actually less since half of it is already redundant).2
-
This is not a 'developer' rant, but goddamn it I work remotely for a few weeks with kids on holiday and sometimes feel like there's no hope for them. I just had one clean up shit from the bathroom door, because apparently they don't know how to wipe their asses properly, and instead of learning from this mistakes they were more concerned about me interrupting their play time to make them clean the shit. Almost seven years old and such a fucking nimwit sometimes. Sometimes I feel like it'd be real helpful to just to spank them..4
-
Wtf is wrong with AWS CDK? I add one EC2 instance and it deletes all my queues and api resources, then fails to create my EC2, does some fucking rollback then attempts and fails at some fucking rollback clean up.
So it nuked my entire fucking stack because why?
Because FUCKING WHY JEFF. WHY IS YOUR ROCKET SHAPED LIKE A PENIS AND WHY IS YOUR SHITTY FUCKING DEPLOYMENT SYSTEM FUCKING WITH ME LIKE THIS.
I can’t do this anymore. I’ve been doing this for months now. I really don’t know whether to laugh or have a mental break down.
Complete Disaster Kunt. That’s what I’m calling this shit from now on. I just don’t get how it can fuck itself up so much4 -
New office stories during the emotional turmoil...
Story 1: The creepy fuck
So being unaware of the fact that I was connected with this guy on LinkedIn already.
Ron walks upto my desk and greets me on my first day on floor. Weird, but whatever.
I politely interact, because gotta make friends and create my following to get shit done.
The next day, randomly comes asking for a laptop sticker and I am like WTF! He is like sticker was an excuse, I just wanted to say Hi!
👀
Day 3: same random creep shit. Talks about personal topics and invades personal space uninvited.
Day 4: Keeps starring at me while I ignore and judges me evidently with stupid suggestions on how to exist without being asked for.
Fuck this guy.
Story 2: The classic case of Dunning Kruger effect
So I get introduced to my tech team today and everyone start piling on me to guide them on decision making. The CTO creates a Slack thread with me and Co-founder asking me to get things moving on priority.
The co-founder shut him out right away. Fucking hilarious.
But, a retard starts schooling me on how to use Slack. Lmfao.
Me being polite, said I'll follow.. dude starts bragging on how he wrote company policy to get everyone on Slack yada yada..
To be honest, the Slack experience is beyond broken based on what these idiot has setup.
He literally opened my Slack and responded to the CTO thread.
That's where I got pissed. I upfront told him that hey! Calm your tiddies down. I know how to use Slack. I have used it since it was in the beta.
I have been in much much mucy bigger orgs and places more well structured than what you have here.
I told him on his face what the flaws where and how I felt a downgrade from where I am coming from.
The look on his face was priceless and he started sweating. Lol
Never again he'll school anyone.
I mean I understand if you are humble and genuinely guiding a new hire. But being cocky unnecessarily and shoving things down my throat without yourself knowing shit or know about the other person is purely asshole move.
Anyway, I am still upset about the scam. Fuck this world.9 -
Seems like there's no perfect balance at work, good at what you're doing? Take that promotion, also now you handle this and that!
Mediocre little shit? uhhh we won't promote him/her but whatever they do something at least.
Man I love my job and my company but fucking hell it seems like people never stop demanding shit from you and when you tell them no they judge you and call you names, like seriously wtf? is there no fucking thing called balance?4 -
My fucking lazy-ass coworkers haven’t made meaningful progress on anything for months. I’m brought in as the tech lead and these stupid fucks didn’t work on any meaningful shit for literal months. Their manager was asleep at the wheel and their old tech leads apparently need months to make a couple of minor database changes.
So I’m brought in to fix it, and… surprise! They’re still lazy pedantic assholes. And they’re shocked - shocked - that people expect them to start completing a project or two per quarter. Like these dense motherfuckers thought that they could be the most annoying pedants this world has ever seen, and also do no work.
I could have done their whole 5 month project myself in a month. No joke. It’s incredibly simple. But somehow the overhead of coordinating people who A. don’t work very hard and B. assume that every ticket needs special attention and 6 hours of ponderous thought has eaten into the time we have.
I don’t respect them in the slightest. They’re such shitty developers. Whoever signed off on their hire was fucking high.5 -
I shouldn't be modifying 7 fucking 200+ line files in your UI to make a single get request. Can we please use some of our common sense to see that doing shit like this completely defeats the principles of our jobs - abstraction and simplification?!
-
how the fuck can I download fucking retard shit of doctl digital ocean on fking windows , i keep getting this retard shit fucking fuck just keep it simple u fuck shits. why do i need to fking copy lines of fuck to power she ll that fking isn't working fuck off
New-Item -ItemType Directory $env:ProgramFiles\doctl\
Move-Item -Path ~\doctl-1.70.0-windows-amd64\doctl.exe -Destination $env:ProgramFiles\doctl\
[Environment]::SetEnvironmentVariable(
"Path",
[Environment]::GetEnvironmentVariable("Path",
[EnvironmentVariableTarget]::Machine) + ";$env:ProgramFiles\doctl\",
[EnvironmentVariableTarget]::Machine)
$env:Path = [System.Environment]::GetEnvironmentVariable("Path","Machine")5 -
Browser automation is a PITA. I’m going on my fourth side mission with this crap and I honestly still look like a newbie. I’ve tried Java Selenium with Chrome, Excel VBA with IE9, Vanilla JS in the browser console, and tonight I’m thinking to concoct some kind of hybrid CDP & Selenium approach in Chrome. Never used CDP before, not even sure where to start but I heard it sucks like anything else unless you get some extra libraries and plugins and stuff.
It doesn’t help that I can’t get just anything I want from our IT Department. It would be another PITA to ask for puppeteer. If puppeteer is totally legit please let me know.
Selenium sucks. The buttons don’t click, the waits don’t wait. Its unusable. Iframes are annoying as all hell but I can deal with that. HTML Tables suck too. It doesn’t help I have to restart my whole java program and whole Chrome every time an element doesn’t get picked correctly. Scripting one single element can take all fucking night.
Chrome dev tools what the fuck. Why the fuck is the DOM explorer in the same window as the web page I’m working on?? I can’t undock it. Am I supposed to use a fucking TV screen to work with this bastard?? If I use the remote chrome tools on port 9225 or whatever - It Still Renders The Whole Fucking Page Alongside The Console. Get Out Of My Way!!! The nested HTML CODE IS ONE CHARACTER WIDE ALL THE TIME. I can’t for the life of me figure out what the fuck I’m looking at. Haven’t you people ever heard of A HORIZONTAL SCROLL BAR at least.
Fuck I tried using getElementById, and the Xpath thing and its not all that great seeing I have seemingly 1000s of nested Divs all over the god damned place oftentimes containing a single element. I’m finally on chrome now should I learn Jquery now? I mean seriously wtf.
I use this one no code tool for dev it has web automation built in. As you can imagine its just as broken as anything else!! I have 10 screens to navigate it gets stuck on the second screen all the damn time. Fuck I love clicking the buttons when my script misses and playing catch up with it.
So as a work around to Selenium not waiting even 1 millisecond when I use explicit wait or implicit wait or fluent wait, I’m guessing maybe I can attach both Chrome Dev Tools Protocol (CDP as ive called it earlier) and selenium to the same browser and maybe I can use CDP to perform a Wait with any degree of success. Selenium will do nothing more than execute vanilla javascript Element.click(); This is the only way I know to even ACTUALLY use selenium beyond the simplest html documents possible. Hell I guess CDP can execute js idk.
I can’t get the new selenium that has CDP but I do have some buggy ass selenium from a few years back. Yeah, I remember reading there was a pretty impactful regression defect in the version I have. Maybe I’m being gaslighted by some shit copy of selenium?
The worst part is that I do seem to be having issues that the rest of the internet’s devs do not seem to be having. People act like browser automation is totally viable and pretty OK. How in the fuck hell is my Selenium Test Suite going to be more reliable my application under test?!!?? I’ll have more fucking bugs in my test suite than in my application. Today, I have less than half a test script and, I. already. fucking. do.
I am still SUPER PISSED at the months of 12 hour days (always 8 hours spent on normal sprint work btw only 4 to automation) I spent trying to automate our regression tests. I got NOWHERE.
I did learn a lot about HTML and JS though like I’m not that mad…but I’m just trying to emphasize my achievement on my task was zero.
The buttons don’t click. There are so many divs and I swear you sometimes need to select a div somewhere in the middle sometimes to get it working. The waits don’t wait. XHR requests are invisible. Java crashes 100 times before I find an xpath and thread.sleep() combo that works. I have no failure modes to use — Sometimes I click the same element 20x in a script because I have no way to know if it clicked the first time! Sometimes you gotta scroll the page to make the click work. So many click methods all broken. So many wait methods all broken. Its not just the elements don’t click! There are so many ways to click that almost work but surely they all fail the same in the end. ok at this point I’m just repeating myself…
there yet even more issues that I can’t remember…and will soon remember as I journey into this project yet again…
thanks for reading I hope I entertained and would love to hear your experience!7 -
Holly fucking crap
i feel like my brains will just start oozing out
my fucking system isn't loading data properly in the table from a db despite following tutorials exactly the same
FUCK THIS SHIT!!!!!!!!10 -
Every time I think it's gonna be different. "This time I'll make a clean repo!". Then the frustration hits and the first "fucking piece of shit" commit creeps in and you push it there. One more repo soiled..5
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wtf is JAMF? a quick look on internet and i can see that its a worst tracking software i guess. remote code execution, network tracking, app usage , system logging, keystroke tracking(maybe), this shit does everything you don't want. I guess this is the end of my devrant, pornhub, leetcode, freelancing, travel booking and everything that i would do on an office laptop while considering it as my own.
"Best remote work culture" my ass. if they can't trust their devs then why even bother letting them work from home? deport them to fucking Guantanamo bay, no?
This is a shitty situation . What do i do now? Install a vpn? will that work? please share names of some good and affordable vpns
i will have to check on this JAMF shit to see if i am able to keep my personal life away from its prying eyes. if not i guess i will have to buy a new device.
what do you people do? are you able to switch context b/w the 2 of your devices easily?I am shit at multi tasking7 -
Anyone else get frustrated by the dust that sits on top of your computer?
Fuck me but I fucking hate this dusty shit, keep cleaning the screen and the keypad but oh well, next time I open there it is - all in its glory.
And there's this fucking constant worry that shit that dust might've gotten inside the laptop and now the performance is gonna fuck up.
SO FUCKING IRRITATING AARGH3 -
Terraform + helm-chart ... I really ned a break. Who the fuck invented this shit.
The HCL format sucks
The documentation sucks
The dev tools suck
The debug output sucks
But I'm ok with that, I can manage.
But today really it shot the bird ... I can't have a fucking comma in a string? Because idk why the fuck helm-release tries to parse that fucking string and wants to make an array or whatever out of it? Why, you fucking abomination?
Something in the docs? Nah, who reads them anyway.
Because you know it's totally not strange that a string is analyse and oh wait there's a comma in it, the dev surely wants me to make an array out of it, because you know ...
So now I have to escape my fucking comma to prevent it to parse my fucking string. I just want to have a fucking string you hideous monstrosity ....1 -
i really fucking hate books, books are so annoying. if you comment on this rant with "lol" or some shit, how is this funny? i have an extreme hatred for books and this is not a joke, i am anti-book.30
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So, I did Ubuntu 18.04 updates today. Apparently doing so broke the sound on my computer. 18.04 is not new. It has been working fine for over 3 years and none of the other updates broke the sound. How do we get to 2022 with Linux being over 20 years old and it fucking breaks the sound on an update? I don't even see shit like this in Windows 10 any more.11
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Vivaldi browser is shit.
Simple isntructions on how to make most shitty browser ever:
1. Force users to use "really-fucking-long" password that will not match to any of their existing ones.
2. Invent some useless stupid "encryption password" (why does any normal browser work fine without that shit) and most ridiculous - automatically set it to be the same as the main password.
3. Of course you forget the pass you set because you dont remember what symbol you added 5 times in the end of your normal pass to fit their stupid rules.
4. You have to reset it
5. "Encryption password" does not reset with it, so you still dont remember it
6. Sync is not working!
7. If you think this is shitty enought, you are not right - they went futher. To reset that fucking "encryption password" you have to... ERASE ALL YOUR CLOUD DATA.
Fucking retarded piece of shit - never, never trust those morons who made this shit browser to sync any of your sensitive information.17 -
It just never works when you try to set up self hostet php apps never theyre all shit they never print any useful errors they just randomly pass wrong args they use fucking ioncube fuck everything6
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hey uh, this is a rant about phantom forces, if you don't know what it is, look it up, anyways, that's really it.
so, i've been playing this game very actively called phantom forces and its a good game but its been ruined and the fun has pretty much been taken away. the community is dead and terrible, the developers don't care and the game is just falling off.
what i consider community is the youtube scene, and now as of january 1st, 2022, there's nothing left that's actually interesting besides godstatus and moons fps studio. honestly, its so dry and i'm sick of it.
i'm tired of seeing shitty best setup videos and gun reviews. i hate somesteven and strider and then, there's nothing to actually watch so i just watch brain-numbing shitty videos about stuff.
and then theres the developers, stylis studios is a great development team, i'll give you that but the sheer ignorance of their team is so fucking much.
its kinda obvious they don't really care about adding new features or anything new that isn't guns and its fucking sickening. just to see the same old updates, every fucking month man, its annoying and tiring.
i'm fucking tired of just seeing ape shit guns that are too high for regular players to actually unlock. like i know they're trying to please the growing number of 200+ rank users but its terrible, they haven't done a gun below rank 200 or 100 in forever. the last time they did it was like 6 months ago or something.
we've been asking for shit for years and they haven't given it to us and its fucking tiring. asking for daily quests, new features, more grips, vehicles and shit like that is obviously never gonna happen and thats the fucking problem. they don't care about their community.
but anyways, thats really all i want to say, might make a follow up post later. if you want to add your 2 cents down in the comments, you can do that. bye2 -
Why the fuck do I have to train ppl on a CRM platform when they have multiple tutorials and I am a backend dev.
Not a fucking CRM dev.
I dont give a shit how the client wants to do business. I just build their tools. -
the october of 2020 was the year when i started my first job. 9 months before that, i was under a severe depression and burnout (i guess?) and had made up a decision to quit android dev, an area for which i was passionate and had proven excellence before.
(just having a few good thoughts and going into a little nostalgia in this rant)
DR has been my goto place for every good/bad/shitty thought, so the rants on those days reflected my mental pain ( am gonna go check those after this rant) and confusions.i was so so much confused:
- "College is about to get over, i have to go earn bread for my family, what am gonna do"?
- "My jan Android internship had so shitty people, it was so much fast paced, they exploied me, mistreated me so much. am never gonna do android dev. should i take this shitty TCS offer of INR 300,000? i bet those guys will be nice atleast, they are a freaking mnc"
- "I don't seem to like anything these tcs people have offered me in their video classes. how am gonna survive my daily job life if i don't like these stuff?"
"FUCKING COVID IS THERE!! MY DAD's SHOP HAS CLOSED DOWN, WE ARE ON OUR LAST SAVINGS !! I SHOULD FUCKING DO SOMETHING, BUT A JUST A 22 YEAR OLD NOBODY!!"
this above, was my fight. to me these were the end of the world thoughts.
however the last day of college came, then the next day came, then another , then a week came and went, then months came and went , then years came and went and today after 2 years, i am just amazed at how things handled themselves. all the above points are now totally invalid in my eyes
i was shit scared to even open android studio after that jan internship. however, every thing i learned in between feb to sept ( and that includes my college stuff, some web dev, php, etc) i would find myself comparing it with java and android. and after spending some off screen time with friends nd family getting some relax, i started applying for jobs at startups. I only ever had confidence in java and kotlin , so 50% of the jobs i applied for were that of android dev.
and it was to no one's surprise that one android startup offered to interview me. i remember being terrible at ds algo, programming, java and even android at that time, yet somehow they saw some potential in me and offered me a role. the role they offered me was for an android dev with a salary of almost double the TCS's offer. this was even more terrifying for me because i was already burnt with a startup offerring money and exploiting me.
But my god how things changed .
This small startup company was everything opposite of that exploitive startup.
- From day 1 to my last day in that company, I had seniors who would give me time to understand stuff, ask questions that they would clarify, understand my knowledge and level and give me tasks accordingly, trust me of my time and my words and appreciate me. no one ever called after 6 pm or on weekends and no one ever counted my leaves or asked question about it.
- I was myself very scared at first, that someday they are gonna blame me, find me as some fraud , some masquerader unfit for the role, but these fears slowly went away. i just found myself diving deeper and deeper into code with full passion love and quest for writing bug free stuff.
- slowly and slowly they even stayed putting me as sole devs in management meetings, making me the front spokesperson for android tech in those meetings, the position that gave me so much confidence since, the people taking the top decisions will change their decisions based on my calls. I also felt a pull for exploring stuff outside my domain, sitting in calls of backend devs , react guys and designers, asking them questions and learning their stuff too.
today i laugh at the problems that life had put in front of me at that time. today my opinion on choosing mnc vs startup is not about who pays how much or where the job is most secure, but its about where i find myself motivated and excited to work.
money is not even a factor anymore. everyone (mncs included) is willing to give tons of money to the worthy candidate, so i won't be ever settling for a low paying job. the topmost priority is which company has the culture to let me grow and keep me on heals at the same time.
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(continued)4 -
i thought whiteboarding turning into leetcode mediums or harder correctly in 20 minutes or less was bad
now codesignal is fucking us over, tried my first one without researching any of the code score shit
anybody have tips for gaming the system there? i heard claims that speed trumps correctness for their point system (e.g. faster but not passing for all test cases may score higher than slower but all test cases pass) additionally code cleanliness/readability isn't weighed as heavily as the other factors
and to do problems individually to completion further rather than spreading yourself out across multiple problems in an exam
wont deny im still a salty scrub at the end of the day