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Search - "doubled it"
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Me: Oh I see were using a non-standard architecture on this app. I like this bit but what is this doing? never seen it before.
Him: Ah we use that to abstract the navigation layer.
Me: oh ok, interesting idea, but that means we need an extra file per screen + 1 per module. We also can't use this inbuilt control, which I really like, and we've to write a tonne of code to avoid that.
Him: Yeah we wanted to take a new approach to fix X, this is what we came up with. Were not 100% happy with it. Do you have any ideas?
**
Queue really long, multi-day architecture discussion. Lots of interesting points, neither side being precious or childish in anyway. Was honestly fantastic.
**
Me: So after researching your last email a bit, I think I found a happy middle ground. If we turn X into a singleton, we can store the state its generating inside itself. We can go back to using the in-built navigation control and have the data being fetched like Y. If you want to keep your dependency injection stuff, we can copy the Angular services approach and inject the singletons instead of all of these things. That means we can delete the entire layer Z.
Even with the app only having 25% of the screens, we could delete like 30+ files, and still have the architecture, at a high level, identical and textbook MVVM.
Him: singleton? no I don't like those, best off keeping it the way it is.
... are you fucking kidding me? You've reinvented probably 3 wheels, doubled the code in the app and forced us to take ownership of something the system handles ... but a singleton is a bad idea? ... based off no concrete evidence or facts, but a personal opinion.
... your face is a bad idea15 -
This facts are killing me
"During his own Google interview, Jeff Dean was asked the implications if P=NP were true. He said, "P = 0 or N = 1." Then, before the interviewer had even finished laughing, Jeff examined Google’s public certificate and wrote the private key on the whiteboard."
"Compilers don't warn Jeff Dean. Jeff Dean warns compilers."
"gcc -O4 emails your code to Jeff Dean for a rewrite."
"When Jeff Dean sends an ethernet frame there are no collisions because the competing frames retreat back up into the buffer memory on their source nic."
"When Jeff Dean has an ergonomic evaluation, it is for the protection of his keyboard."
"When Jeff Dean designs software, he first codes the binary and then writes the source as documentation."
"When Jeff has trouble sleeping, he Mapreduces sheep."
"When Jeff Dean listens to mp3s, he just cats them to /dev/dsp and does the decoding in his head."
"Google search went down for a few hours in 2002, and Jeff Dean started handling queries by hand. Search Quality doubled."
"One day Jeff Dean grabbed his Etch-a-Sketch instead of his laptop on his way out the door. On his way back home to get his real laptop, he programmed the Etch-a-Sketch to play Tetris."
"Jeff Dean once shifted a bit so hard, it ended up on another computer. "6 -
Just found out the backend developer I’m always complaining about. The one who:
- Can’t implement OAuth, and we have to have app users login every 24 hours because we have no way to generate new refresh tokens.
- Who used the phrase “your time zone is not my concern” to avoid building something that would let us inject test data.
- Who’s been debugging a critical bug affecting many users since December.
- Who can’t conduct API tests from external internet (you know, like the way the app will be in the wild) because it takes too much time.
- Who replies to Jira tickets only on a blue moon.
- Who has been 90% of the reason for my blood pressure situation
... is a fucking principal engineer in this company. In pecking order, his opinion should be considered more valuable than mine and everyone on my team.
I’ve just lost the will to live. How are big organizations THIS bad. Seriously, what promotion discussion did he go into
“So, you are a complete and utter bastard, nobody can stand to speak to you and you’ve yet to deliver anything of worth that actually works, over the course of several years ... ... ... interested in having your pay doubled??”20 -
Senior Management: We are severely disappointed in the timeliness of the two apps you built this year. You had budgeted 3 months for one and it took 4 months and the other was budgeted to take 4 months and took 5 months. We understand that we doubled the requirements halfway through and but that doesn’t take away from our need for you to deliver on time. We provided you with two extra devs on the project! We know they were novices and you had to train them from the ground up during the project, that doesn’t matter. The extra resources should have helped you but your lack of leadership ability is what caused them to hold you back. We know our other team with a budget of 6 months took 2 years on their project and was still unsuccessful but that is a different scenario! That was a pre-built 3rd party ERP plugin, way more complicated and nuanced than simply building and deploying something from scratch. Yes we’re aware your projects were the only successful tech projects at the company this year, that’s just luck and coincidence. The next app we need you to build in 6 months, no questions asked. It needs to consolidate and tie together our 3 different ERPs. Everything that we need out of these products that they don’t do out of the box we need you to wire up. We will decide the exact requirements in a month or so, for now just get started. Yes your apps changed the way we do business and allowed us to complete projects smoother than ever before while saving millions of dollars in wasteful and archaic processes that is OLD NEWS. Stop bringing it up. The successes of yesterday are the status quo of today. Don’t expect any new resources either, you clearly can’t handle them. You will now be giving status updates to 3 different managers as a corrective action to your missed deadlines in order to ensure the timeliness of future deliverables.
Dev: …25 -
Dear Whatsapp.
FUCK YOU
When i sit on my computer and use the web application, it means I WANT TO USE WHATSAPP ON MY FUCKING PC. If i wanted to use my mobile, i would DO IT. BUT I DON'T, SO I USE MY FUCKING PC. So don't fuckin tell me to connect my telephone to the internet so i can use your fuckin web application. I ALREADY GOT A HEADACHE FROM THE DOUBLED NOTIFICATIONS.9 -
We've been trying to hire a greenhorn, fresh-faced intern from India for like a month now.
Plenty of applicants, most with very nice curriculums, a few even can think on their feet while grilled by my questions.
I've sent to talk to HR three almost college-graduating candidates, who convinced me they know the subject of data engineering enough to be working with me and that they are actually gonna do the tasks assigned.
The fucking tweep at HR, an old fart who I had to convince that HVAC maintenance is not the job of the IT department nor the data team, calls my approved candidates "too junior".
WTF, I ask. - "Not professional enough", says the human toad.
Yes, they are to be interns! - "But they do not show professionalism", answered the hag.
Yes they do! They were very professional on the interviews! - "That is for me to say!" barked the reptile.
A week pass by while I try to find more just as good candidates who are also "more professional" when the hag has the audacity to say "here, I found someone. He knows everything about computer things and is very professional".
I took like 20 seconds to find out that the kid she'd given my number to, and was now messaging me IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FUCKING NIGHT, was her niece's fiancee and wasn't even in uni! He was just a high school graduate!
Seriously, nepotism kids, delete your Instagrams, tiktoks and every single piece of social media.
I scaled the issue to my VP, who contacted the HR VP for India, who gave the worst possible excuse for her behaviour: "She knows nothing about computer things!" for what my own boss said "so why was she assigned to oversee the data team's new hires?!". The HR slug mumbled something and then doubled down with "well, the kids you sent her were all girls! she had never hired a girl to a technical position, she wouldn't know what to look for in an interview!"
What. The. Fuck.
My boss, my VP of a very strategic technical area, happens to be a woman who lives in a place where women's rights are for real. I had *never* heard she swear on a non-football-related context. She did. Loudly. On camera. As if the HR boss was a referee who just disallowed a goal for her team due to an very ambiguous forward pass.
Shit is still flowing, but it seems that the hiring process of the entire company is being restructured because of that.
I guess I've just sped up this process in about one hundred years?9 -
Wtf. My mobiles 4 core CPU by default is clocked at 1190MHz. So I just wanted to see if I can over clock it a little (coz why not) and edited some stuff in my kernel. Now it runs stable at 2265MHz.... I mean.... Why the fuck didn't they apply that by default if its possible?12
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I just love it when our clients decide to make a clone of live production server..then put it immediately online..and don't tell anyone about this.. and then start bitchin how data gets doubled all of a sudden..
Yeah, no shit sherlock.. you have two prod servers for 'hot swapping' and some services may only be running on one at a time.. You even have a manual on how to switch primary to secondary (turn off services on primary first, then turn them on on secondary and all)..or in case primary actually dies, just turn on services on secondary and you're good to go, right?
So how do ya think cloning the one with running services and putting the clone immediately online will work out?! 🤔
God, I thought it was common sense to not do that..but here I am, bitchin about how people fail to RTFM.. :/ or use brain..fuck..4 -
Woke up from my sleep last night because the solution for a long running bug hit me. In a hurry I ran to my work-desk not too far from the bed and flipped open my laptop so hard I broke the screen.
I’ve sent the laptop for repair but my night was so long I didn’t want to get off because previously I only had one problem but then it doubled.2 -
Sleeping the Thread for 1 sec, because the database had no real timestamp and a transaction on the same item within the same second would lead to a doubled primary key...
No real feature, but it is a bug and this makes it a feature I guess.1 -
I wish I can fucking clone myself.
We have been providing digital marketing services for like 5 years without having a proper QA team. Well because we cannot afford to hire one. Technically I am supposed to check and control the quality of our operation team. But I have been juggling so many balls and couldn't do that properly.
So this year we decided that we have to seriously take care of that. But we are providing all kinds of services and creating a QA team for all those services is gonna be costly. We wanna solve it, but also doesn't wanna hang ourselves with another rope. So we have decided to just found a QA team with leaders from various departments mainly Sales and Customer Services. They are the ones who have talked with clients. So they should be able to judge the quality of the services our operation made.
It is a fucking nightmare. It is like we have doubled the amount of clients. And that extra half of those newly popped up clients are sitting in our office. -
The moment the first news article was published in my country about covid cases decreasing (it isn't actually decreasing btw), these motherfucking sweatshops just swarm in like a pack of fucking hyenas to open up and get their employees killed again.
What the fuck is up with this sweatshop bullshit attitude of "Devs won't work unless I micromanage them in person" you twats? My productivity has literally doubled the entire time I was at home.
And this sickening, narcissistic email about how we're supposed to enthusiastically go for work and meet our friends and increase productivity, yay, jesus fucking christ, my apartment has two ongoing cases. Try living in the real world some times you HR troglodytes. -
My internet provider is a real thief, they doubled the price but the quality became catastrophic, today all the day the internet was down and tye signal quality is very poor..
When I decided to change the provider, I drove to his sales service, and it appears that he changed the location. so I came back to home and I was very angry. I drove very fast and I break the speed limit, received an SMS with money fuckening charge.
great !!
shiiiiit7 -
Why is it, that every time Microsoft updates their Office, it gets worse?
You want your “ribbon simplified?” You’ve got it, we removed all the buttons that you usually need.
You want a clearer view of items? You’ve got it, we doubled the font size and added 10cm empty spaces between emails in the list.
Wanna see how the weather in Washington? You’ve got it. We added the forecast info there automatically. We know that it’s like 20 000km away from you!
What else could we do in future to fuck up your setup more?6 -
I lived to see this ... I asked for a salary and the recruiter doubled it . I remained speechless . I didn't bother to ask why i just accepted it ...2
-
I've just came to the end of my probation in a new role... Been told I've passed it already... But just raised an interesting typo in my original offer letter....
Instead of saying a
"pay increase up to £#####"
it says a
"pay rise OF £#####"
Upon completing your probation
So in half a mind to ask when I'll see my salary more than doubled like the offer letter says!3 -
So, idk if I told you guys yet but I'm a web dev intern.
Recently the company I work at doubled in size and so this was the result...
Here's what my weekend looked like:
Friday:
0830: Math exam at school
1005: Get on the public transportation
1100: Arrived at internship
1130: Get started on setting up 8 new PC's
/*realize I have to do them one by one, clean window installation, office, updates, and some random software. Internet connection sucks, so one PC at a time it is.*/
2130: bus ride home.
Saturday:
0900: Get on public transportation to work
1000: Arrive and start finishing up PC's
1600: Start moving old pc's to new room and install new pc's
2130: Get on bus ride home
Sunday:
0830: Get call from second job asking me to do some stuff.
1100: be done with second job
1400: Get on public transport to work
1500: start cleaning up old pc's for reuse
2130: Go home
And today we finished installing everything.
I've spend 17 hours of my weekend at internship. Guess who's taking Wednesday and Friday off? -
My department was tasked with building browser extentions for Shopify to add functionality to their admin panel.
We warned the bosses about how unstable these extentions could become as there is no warning of changes to Shopify's code. If they make a small change it could break everything.
Instead of listening to us, what did they do? They doubled down and had us build this massive plug-in that adds dozens of complicated UIs and features to run the core of their business. I actually left the company over this and several other questionable decisions.
Last week I was catching up with their last remaining dev. Appearently a few weeks ago most of it fell apart and some of its not fixable unless Shopify makes some changes.1 -
For the last 6 months I dived deep in the open-source world. I cried so many times. Lack of recent documentation, a lot of products having multiple ways to install, almost nothing works out of the box and requires additional tweaking.
But... Man is it bloody fast.
After Windows everything seems to have doubled in speed.
C++ is freaking awesome (still feeling disgusted from the syntax though unless it's modern)
And emacs... I'm having a hunch, it was supposed to be it's own operating system for some reason ;D -
When a webshop stock owner gets mad when their stock quantities don't add up, because it magically doubled +1y ago, and has been corrected now due to physically missing products while collecting ...
oh well. -
Some long thoughts about state of desktop operating systems.
I always hated window management on desktop. There is basically no difference in usability between mobile and desktop in terms of application management. There is still finite amount of apps you can have in focus and you need to switch between them so they’re left from your screen.
What you end up is finite amount of screens you can connect into your computer or pounding switch context shortcut every other second.
We pushed computing so far and screen resolutions doubled from 1024x768 but the active desktop size is still the same.
For me adding additional display to laptop is not an option. What I love with remote work is that I can lay in my bed or on sofa or wherever I want to and write some code. My point is I don’t want to be stuck to my desk if I want to write / debug something.
Back to the desktop I think there is missing part of our state of desktop right now. The most we have are virtual desktops we can switch between but we can’t get parts of two desktops on same screen.
What I would love to test / develop is smooth infinite desktop with pinch and zoom - drag and drop navigation between my apps.
The problematic thing is determination of where user want’s to focus - is it fullscreen app or multiple apps on same screen and how to handle partially visible windows.
But I would love to test it. Maybe one day I switch to linux desktop just to try to implement the infinite desktop as an alternative to virtual desktops.
Maybe some rich frustrated kid would make it someday while I’m stuck at working my shit ass to pay for being able to have a decent life on this fucking planet…
I wish I can retire to focus on such things.2 -
Today I got screwed over by a CDN which is the first time I have seen it. I was getting a code 520 on the browser's console.
Package link -> https://npmjs.com/package/tippy.js/
After I downloaded its contents and put it directly in a js file, my website speed doubled in performance.
Its making me question using CDNs from this point onwards.1 -
7 monthos ago, i invested a ridiculus amount of money on crypto. The day this month i decided to buy a battery for my loved laptop, i was notified that this crypto had doubled its price. Thanks Lord My God, i said, without any work and stress, i had 100% profit, i would totally buy the battery from the new money, i converted them all in euros, and started my odyssey.
Well, the platform, need 2fa to withdraw your money. But it did not inform you, it only had a popup saying "Reming me later".
WTF means "remind me later", for me it is something optional!!!! No red colours, no messages like (try again, your transactionr requires this ) etc.
Time is the only resource that do not come back, and i feel that my profit is already less, since the hour i spent searching, and searching, and then searching the chat (which is very well hidden...) and then chatting, and then writting this rant, i could have worked for the same amount of money.....6 -
I got my first developer job three years ago. I’ve always had a great eye for detail, and getting things done while following best practices. I learned that a few years ago from typography, which I think is a fascinating subject, which has a lot of shared ideas with software development.
In my first job, I immediately took a lot more responsibility than what I was assigned to. This job was as a React Developer, but I quickly got into backend development and set up kubernetes clusters, CI/CD.
Looking back, this was to me quite an achievement, considering I had never done anything even remotely close to it.
I did however, work my ass off. 18 hours work days without telling my boss, so only getting paid for 8. Plus I worked weekends.
I did love it. After a while, I got promotes to Senior Developer, and got responsibility for everything technical. I tried asking for help, but everybody else was either a student, or working purely front-end or app-development. Meanwhile, I was Devops, API-design, backend, Ci/CD, handling remote installations (all our customers are Airgapped), customer support, front-end and occasionally app-development when the app-developers could not handle their shit. Basically, I was the goto-guy for every problem, every feature, every fix. I don’t say this to brag.
I recently quit my job, started working as a consultant, because I almost doubled my pay. However the new job is boring as shit. I’m now an overpaid React Developer. And I really hate React. Not because it is shit, but simply because it is boring.
I’m thinking of going back to my old job. It was a lot of work, but it was really interesting. However, after I quit, they have changed their whole stack. No more Golang, Containers, Kubernetes, webRTC and other fun new technologies. Now, it is just plain, PHP without any dependecies. It is both boring, and idiotic. So I’m thinking of just quitting. Either doing some personal projects like game-development. I dont know. -
#Suphle Rant 6: Deptrac, phparkitect
This entry isn't necessarily a rant but a tale of victory. I'm no more as sad as I used to be. I don't work as hard as I used to, so lesser challenges to frustrate my life. On top of that, I'm not bitter about the pace of progress. I'm at a state of contentment regarding Suphle's release
An opportunity to gain publicity presented itself last month when cfp for a php event was announced last month. I submitted and reviewed a post introducing suphle to the community. In the post, I assured readers that I won't be changing anything soon ie the apis are cast in stone. Then php 7.4 officially "went out of circulation". It hit me that even though the code supports php 8 on paper, it's kind of a red herring that decorators don't use php 8 attributes. So I doubled down, suspending documentation.
The container won't support union and intersection types cuz I dislike the ambiguity. Enums can't be hydrated. So I refactored implementation and usages of decorators from interfaces to native attributes. Tried automating typing for all class properties but psalm is using docblocks instead of native typing. So I disabled it and am doing it by hand whenever something takes me to an unfixed class (difficulty: 1). But the good news is, we are php 8 compliant as anybody can ask for!
I decided to ride that wave and implement other things that have been bothering me:
1) 2 commands for automating project setup for collaborators and user facing developers (CHECK)
2) transferring some operations from runtime to compile/build TIME (CHECK)
3) re-attempt implementing container scopes
I tried automating Deptrac usage ie adding the newly created module to the list of regulated architectural layers but their config is in yaml, so I moved to phparkitect which uses php to set the rules. I still can't find a library for programmatically updating php filed/classes but this is more dynamic for me than yaml. I set out to implement their library, turns out the entire logic is dumped into the command class, so I can neither control it without the cli or automate tests to it. I take the command apart, connect it to suphle and run. Guess what, it detects class parents as violations to the rule. Wtflyingfuck?!
As if that's not bad enough, roadrunner (that old biatch!) server setup doesn't fail if an initialization script fails. If initialization script is moved to the application code itself, server setup crumbles and takes the your initialization stuff down with it. I ping the maintainer, rustacian (god bless his soul), who informs me point blank that what I'm trying to do is not possible. Fuck it. I have to write a wrapper command for sequentially starting the server (or not starting if initialization operations don't all succeed).
Legitimate case to reinvent the wheel. I restored my deleted decorators that did dependency sanitation for me at runtime. The remaining piece of the puzzle was a recursive film iterator to feed the decorators. I checked my file system reader for clues on how to implement one and boom! The one I'd written for two other features was compatible. All I had to do was refactor decorators into dependency rules, give them fancy interfaces for customising and filtering what classes each rule should actually evaluate. In a night's work (if you're discrediting how long writing the original sanitization decorators and directory iterator), I coupled the Deptrac/phparkitect library of my dreams. This is one of the those few times I feel like a supreme deity
Hope I can eat better and get some sleep. This meme is me after getting bounced by those three library rejections