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Search  "mathematician"

Mathematician girl invites me to code some lines.
I arrive at her flat and she was alone so some part of me thought ehem. Anyway i took a look at the program first.
Me: so... it's a date?
Her: no im using cosmic radiation.
Me: huh?
Her: yeah accessing a value from a sensor gives a..
(Apparently she thought i was asking about the Random Function she was using, which usually uses the date)24 
Would you like to smile for 10 seconds? Read this short story:
*Story begins*
During World War II, numerous fighter planes were getting hit by antiaircraft guns. Air Force officers wanted to add some protective armour/shield to the planes.
The question was "where"?
The planes could only support few more kilos of weight. Mathematicians were called for a short consulting project.
Fighter planes returning from missions were analysed for bullet holes per square foot.
They found 1.93 bullet holes/sq. foot near the tail of planes whereas only 1.11 bullet holes/sq. foot close to the engine.
The officers thought that since the tail portion had the greatest density of bullets, it would be the logical location for putting an antibullet shield.
A mathematician said exactly the opposite; more protection is needed where the bullet holes aren't  that is around the engines.
His judgement surprised everyone. He said "He said We are counting the planes that returned from a mission. Planes with lots of bullet holes in the engine did not return at all".
Moral: Not everything that counts can be counted, and not everything that can be counted, counts.
Source: From the book 
"How Not To Be Wrong", by Jordan Ellenberg.4 
A physicist, a mathematician, and a statistician go hunting. They spot a deer, and take aim. The physicist shoots first and misses 10 meters to the right. The mathematician shoots next and misses 10 meters to the left. The statistician then throws down his gun and proclaims, “we got it!”1

When you finally accept that in order to write a game engine all your self, you not only have to be a programmer but a mathematician.
Alright. Time to hit the math books for a while.5 
Junior dude in my team: Started working with the expectation to get dirty and go deep into technology (he was in fact a mathematician). The first two months he was happy like a little puppy playing around. Then suddenly he started talking about getting more responsibilities and beeing more a manager than a dev (because development is too stressful). Then on his last day of the probation period he quit out of nowhere because he got a job offer from a place he really wanted to go. He bought one beer per person in my team, but haven't invited my boss to that event. We suddenly realize why: He talked real shit about him!
What a dick!4 
Me and my two coworkers are the perfect start of a joke: a mathematician, a physicist and a computer scientist walk into a bar...7

Teaching my little sister Mathematics (Grade/Class 12. Not at all easy).
And I can really understand the textbook definitions in the chapters. Back then, I never understood a single line of it.
Am I a more sound mathematician now or reading poor documentations has improved my skill to read complex and minimal contents!3 
First day of the academic year(CS):
(some uni official)  "And remember to become a good programmer you have to become an excellent mathematician first"
(Me): Oh shit.
Little did I know...
It is a second year now. And the only course I failed is the one that he lectured.
I had no fucking idea that people like this (mad)man exist.
Almost at every lecture he was introducing at leas one topic that was way beyond our program; as he thought they were interesting and "fun".
Many teachers at the University refered to him as a very 'ambitious' man. Then I didn't blame him he truly loved his profession and wanted to share as much knowledge as possible(I thought).
But two months ago he went to far. It was a second exam(for those who failed the first one). And believe me there were a few(60 out of 160 to be exact).
Only ~30 people showed up as the rest failed to many courses and would be kicked out of the uni anyway.
He was handing out the exams when I saw that whoever gets one slowly starts turning white.
I finally got my copy and immediately I realized that the tasks are from his favorite topics, the "fun" ones. 🤦
At this point I knew that it will be extremely hard to pass. But when I was reevaluating my life choices something draw my attention.
One of the tasks had a note below it: "Homework after the exam: It is a very interesting problem just assume x instead of y and try to solve it. PS: it is a lot of fun!"
At this point I lost it.😠 I don't care how much you love math, you should always assume that not everyone loves it as much as you do. So don't push it down the throat of people who clearly don't need a degree in this subject!
Now I'm preparing for the second semester with this guy. And I have a strong feeling that it will be hell of a ride... again.😐
BTW: Sorry that the rant is so long, it's the first one I wrote, and had to share it with someone 😀26 
I feel like "programmers are not computer technicians" joke is kinda overused lately. It doesn' matter if we are not technicians, we are very knowledgeable in computers and people knows that. People of course will try to get help from you when they can so it's not a wonder that they ask you to help with something they are not confident. Everyone that exercises practical professions lives through that. If your sisterinlaw is a mathematician it's normal to ask for help if you are not able to come up with the right algorithm for the task. People depend on each other. That's how we survive.
But I'm not saying start helping everybody that can't open a pdf file. Just know who to choose to help. If they are a capable person or someone that's a part of your everyday life they will most likely repay you when you are also in need. Believe me everyone needs help time to time.3 
Italy, nation of tecnology. A work agency is looking for a mathematician or a statitician that use EXCEL.1

A couple of days ago, an individual attempted to convince me that the National Security Agency is capable of cracking Rijndael encryption; as a response, I informed the individual of the infeasible nature of the factoring of extremely large semiprimes; however, my attempts were futile, as the individual believes that NSA possesses sufficient power to crack this encryption without intercepting the transmission of the corresponding private key.
The DunningKruger effect is real; although this individual tends to be logicallyminded, there does exist an exception to this good behaviour.
"It is easier to square a circle than get 'round a mathematician."1 
If you ask a scientist what pi is, he'll tell you it equals 3.14159..
If you ask a mathematician, he'll tell you pi equals the circumference of a circle divided by its diameter..
If you ask an engineer, he'll say "Pi? Well, it's about 3, but we'll call it 4 just to be safe.."
But if you ask a kid, he’ll ask if he can have ice cream with it...!8 
float integral = 0;
float dx=float.minValue;
for (float x = a; x<=b; x+=dx) {
integral+=f(x)*dx;
}
A classmate just literally wrote this and he believed it was the proper way to do it.
I asked him to integrate f(x)=1 on 0<x<1. 
Merry GravMass!
So I saw many „Merry Christmas“ posts here lately.
But many of you may have forgotten that 25th of December is the birthday of the greatest physician and mathematician of all time — Isaac Newton! So let's celebrate the existence of comprehensible physical laws!
One way to celebrate GravMass is to decorate a tree with apples and other fruits. Glue them or attach them, but not too well! The idea is that occasionally a fruit should fall. Put them on the tree no more than 2 feet up, so that they won't get damaged or hurt anybody when they fall. Investigating and perfecting the methods for doing this is a great way expose a child to the process of scientifically studying the behavior of the physical world.
Merry GravMass and happy New Year! 🍎
Further reading: https://stallman.org/gravmass.html4 
any mathematician turned devs here?
I think developers with a formal mathematical education should be the ones actually developing softwares. Ordinary developers are just good cooks who know to prepare these recipes by knowing to mix and manage the Ingredients through their experience, developing software using various libraries and frameworks, I don't understand what innovation we devs do in it, makes me feel less passionate about my work sometimes.
(I embrace the fact that being a developer requires an arstisic craftsmanship to do it properly)9 
Packt.com (dev education books) is doing a survey of their readers. I don't fit into any of their boxes, closest one is data scientist.
I think I might really be a mathematician rather than a dev...
I hated maths at highschool.1 
I still remember that afternoon when I was in 9th grade, it was raining outside, I entered in the lab for the first time, and there she was sitting alone, shining like a dew drop. I could not resist, and I sit with her for a while, we talked, we touched, and the magic happened. that was the day and today is the day, no one can take us apart. We are like made for each other. That was for the first time I touched a machine, and never looked back. The endless possibilities with programming, and desire to fulfil the everlasting thirst of creativity and problem solving made a developer/programmer/mathematician/physicist.

Fortunately, from what I have told my parents about it from high school to now, they basically see me as some sort of mathematician/problem solver. They understand that they don't understand, but do not belittle what I do in the process.
Now, people in other departments... They think I copy paste stuff from the internet and completely different languages and it's that easy. 
On science and religion. Inspied by a comment in another rant, credits to @Commodore and @cjbatz
According to Godel's incompletness theorems, aritmetics is incomplete and inconsistent. Therefore, any science based on aritmetics (dude, like, every) is also.
Therfore, as a mathematician, I must accept that there are things that cannot be proven by current science, and that there are statements that are true and false at the same time in current science.
So, science can't prove religious beliefs? It cant prove P vs NP either. It might someday. Science couldn't prove earth wasn't flat for a looong time. Or Pythagoras theorem.
But more importantly, if science can prove something, doesn't mean it can't prove the exact oposite.
This way of thinking allows for any and all ridiculous beliefs, under the shield of "it might be proven one day" or "doent't mean opposite isn't true also" but kerp in mind that there are complete and consistent sciences and proofs in them. Check if something's been proven to exist or not exist without doubt.11