Join devRant
Do all the things like
++ or -- rants, post your own rants, comment on others' rants and build your customized dev avatar
Sign Up
Pipeless API
From the creators of devRant, Pipeless lets you power real-time personalized recommendations and activity feeds using a simple API
Learn More
-
Me: "can we go to the cinema this weekend?"
gf: "uhm, maybe if blablabla..."
Me: "boolean!"
gf: "true"
...9 -
Movie idea: a plane in mid air catches the wannacrypt virus and refuses manual control. The plane flies straight forward but they only have 2h until they're out of fuel and crash. The only way to pay the ransom is to get enough bitcoins but a recent price-fluctuation made the amount of bitcoins to pay way too high. The only way to resolve this is to create a tumoil on social media causing the bitcoin price to go down.
Visit your local cinema this summer to see 200 passengers and a group of devrant-guest-starrings use nothing but their brains, geniuety and arsenal of devices. Will they find the guy that blocks the wifi by watching 4k porn? Will alice and alexdelarge have to resort to building a fuel-powered mining-rig? Or will linux and linuxxx compile an open-source cockpit program before they run out of time? If so, will they even be able to decide on a linux distro to install on the cockpit?
Coming out in <% new Date().getFullYear() + 1 %>21 -
!rant
*in slack*
Me: Team's gonna watch IT. Wanna come?
Friend from other team: Yeah, sure!
*in cinema*
Friend: WTF! Why is this I.T? This is scary as fuck!
Me: I-T? It's "it". HAHAHAHA It's a remake of the It 1990 movie.
Friend: I don't know anything about that. I'm scared as hell! I thought this would be some tech stuff and crying in the server room or something!7 -
Wait so I'm not allowed Spotify but it's alright for a manager to stream movies?
Don't give that we're not licensed to play music pretty sure we're not a licensed cinema either.
Either it's one rule for all or none at all enjoy your productivity dip from the dev team.8 -
I know this is not a dev joke, but I laughed so hard:
Father bought a lie detector that makes "beep" whenever somebody lies around it. The son comes home this afternoon.
Father ask him:
"So, you where at school today, right ?"
Son:"Yeah"
Detector:"Beep."
Son:"OK, OK, I was in a cinema"
Detector:"Beep."
Son:"Alright, I went for a beer with my friends."
Father:"What ?! At your age I would never touch alcohol!"
Detector: "Beep."
Mother laughs:"Ha ha ha, he really is your son!"
Detector: "Beep."1 -
So this is a huge fancy screen showing movie times and marketing stuff at my local cinema.
// TODO: get a better camera phone
6 -
Just came home from the cinema in zurich switzerland where Samsung installed the largest 4K LED TV. Yes that's not a textile canvas in the picture, it's a wall of led tiles called Samsung ONYX. It's a real pleasure to look at. High contrasts and brilliant color. I'm in love 😍
https://goo.gl/GjsDMx
Samsung Debuts World's First 3D Cinema LED Screen Theater in ...
14 -
So I work as a "Web Development Lead"
Which means I lead (frontend,backend and infrastructure teams)
Also I am in charge of infrastructure or devops or whatever you call it, which means I handle production issues, dev and staging environments,...etc
and I am a team of one, and today I asked for a day off because it's my wife's birthday
and suddenly everyone is blocked, everything is on fire, and the phone is not stopping ringing, I had to go out of the cinema theater to answer the non-stopping calls
I AM ASKING FOR A SINGLE DAY, A FUCKING DAY, EVEN IF SOMEONE IS BLOCKED SO WHAT IT'S NOT EVEN A DAY I ONLY NEED 6 HOURS
IS TO TOO MUCH FUCKING TO ASK4 -
!Rant
Story, only read this if you feel like wasting your time
Ok so I live in a small village and it takes around 15 minutes to get to the next city by car. I can't drive yet because I am 15 and so I would need my parents to drive me there. There are also no buses anymore which drive to the city after 2pm.
Most of my friends live in that city, none of them code. We always meet on a discord server and then play games or do some other shit. Today I got online at around 3pm and when I joined the discord server they asked me if I wanted to go see the movie 'IT' with them tonight, I said yeah of course (I am a huge fan of horror movies), but only if my parents come home early enough to drive me there.
Time passed and then my last friend left the discord server because he had to walk to the cinema.
I was the last one still on the server and also the one with the farest way to the cinema. I already knew that my parents wouldn't come home in time anymore and so I decided to just start coding something. I usually code while listening to some music and so I switched over to spotify to choose a playlist. I just randomly clicked on the first playlist spotify recommended me and the song started playing: 'Sound of silence'.
Fuck you spotify algorithm.
I know that not being able to go to the cinema with your friends is a fucking stupid reason to be sad but I just feel very sad right now. Sitting alone in my dark room staring at my computer screen.
Sorry for wasting your time18 -
sitting with friends and trying to book movie tickets online. the cinema simulator shows all good seats as booked. Me: "don't worry guys". open inspect element, changing the seat image from booked to available. now everybody think im hacker... :)5
-
Oh yeah, got myself a new vintage 30" cinema monitor. Total pain to push those pixels to such an old monitor, but if you get a nice deal it's still super competitive as a monitor.
4 -
Just cancelled my cinema booking for "Morgan" because THE STRESS BALL HAS ARRIVED!
AW YEAH! CAN'T.WAIT.TO.SQUEEZE.IT1 -
So, Terminator : Dark Fate was in the cinema. Not as good as I had expected, and Hollywood's contemporary in-your-face leftist propaganda made it even weaker.15
-
I fucking hate malls.
People don't walk in any regular pattern or at the same speed. Full of smelly kids and their dumbstruck parents. I REALLY do not understand how some choose to spend their time at the mall as a recreational activity (other than going with a specific destination in mine, like the cinema). Whenever the circumstances force me to wonder around one for more than ten minutes, for me it's the equivalent of several hours of work, energywise.
Generally I hate people, but malls are the places where I hate them the most. Fuck!4 -
I just saw the equalizer 2 at the cinema and about half way through there is a phone with "military grade encryption" on it. We see the phone screen showing the encryption and what is it? Freaking JQuery!3
-
Found this on the big ass advert screen outside my cinema. The Dino represents my feelings very well to that exact message 😂
1 -
Years ago I was working in local cinema as a student job from time to time and used to sleep after shifts at my uncle's. Uncle did not had internet but there were so many wlans all around. Since I had nothing to do for hours after shift, I downloaded Backtrack linux at home, made live dvd of it and saved a two articles of "how to hack wifi" to text files.
It took me 4 hours to break WEP, since I was total lame, and it was the only one WEP around. They also had mac restrictions set to router, so I changed my mac address to one of their devices, logged in to router and added our mac address. For my uncle it was complete magic but since he is total geek to linux he liked it.
Fast forward weeks later. When I came to my uncle's house he was downloading like ton of linux distributions. Literally each one. Gigabytes of data. I told him not to do so because sooner or later neighbour will notice, but he did not care. Guess what, he notices, probably slow internet and (maybe) bigger bills, I do not know, but owner just changed protocol to WPA2, not changing password. So the story continued for almost 2 years. Felt a bit sorry for neighbour but did not expect such an outcome. I just wanted to watch youtube videos and scroll social networks, keeping low profile so no one notice.1 -
Oh boi... that was a great and a shitty day.
Let us just see the positives tho.
A: Shopping in huge ass mall. (I hate Shopping, but not when it is about tech, cars, books, ahem playb... errrm just joking, food and Cinema I am all in.)
B: Visiting a place for animals living on the wild streets of Antalya. That place was right under the sun. It was not a building or anything like that. Near a well-known tower from the Osmanian Empire. There were a lot of kittens everywhere. The kittens were so cute. Omg. Most of them even had an own house. All of them colored in many different colors. Their houses have been donated by couples. Even the government helped the kittens by placing water refreshers with a roof above them. The man who is feeding them is someone who seemed to be like a poor man. He was very kind. I like him. We donated some money, but we could not do any more than that since we are not allowed to take them to Germany via air plane. Makes sense, right?
C: We made a boat trip. Oh boy... That was fucking awesome. I was allowed to get to the "nose" of the boat and chill there. I somehow found the confidence to take a group selfie with strangers LOL
4 -
After I was woken up in the morning by my friend that had a meeting nearby.
We went for coffee and as part of usual Wednesday I also decided to go to cinema to see Dr Dollitle ( not verry funny ).
I felt relaxed as everyone fucked off from me since Monday.
I was so happy of doing nothing after the movie I decided to try to make both frontend and backend for new application screens in finite time.
I could have waited for frontend developer to be back from his vacation but since I can also do it I decided to do it myself.
I did frontend part first with mock data and after finishing it before 2 pm asked if client will have time to discuss it. He didn’t so we decided I try to add real data and publish it on test environment.
Well those are mock up screens anyway so I decided to eat and smoke to chill but also try to work anyway.
I just finished backend for those screens and switched test environment to new branch.
Looks like they’re working for biggest client customers.
Usually it takes about a week or two to describe frontend developer what client wants but let’s see if I still have some frontend UX empathy left and can speed up development by couple of days. -
Ah I love that movie.. Hero, from 2002. I've seen it in the cinema three times. It's a real marvel, especially the scene where the forest turns red right after Snow killed Moon.
I also like how the quotes are adaptable:
Martial arts and programming are quite different, but they are based on the same principle: striving for highest perfection.
The essence of programming reveals itself through study and meditation.
(The latter one is also one of my favourite lines at work when being asked how come I know some esoteric stuff: it revealed itself through study and meditation.)5 -
In from of a cinema. I was doing my BSc thesis involving a GPS receiver. The pointcloud on my pc had to be synchronized with where the receiver was, so it had to be tested outdoor. I and my teacher drove around some streets to see if my code worked, and everytime it didn't we had to stop in a parking lot (the one of a cinema). I couldn't code inside the car because the GPS receiver my laptop was connected to (via USB) didn't get a decent signal there, so I had to fix bugs sat on a brickwork in front of the cinema. My teacher kept looking at my monitor constantly, it was summer with 28°C, the sun hitting on me and my monitor, I couldn't see shit, the sweat of my hands flooding the keyboard. After a while I was saved by my laptop's battery which gave up. Thank you laptop <31
-
Oh my f**cking god! Bohemian Rhapsody is quite possibly the greatest movie ever made, at least the greatest biopic! Left the cinema with chills 😮😁2
-
You ever had a boss that made you feel like his bitch but he never really earned the title
You also know from a technical skill perspective you’re more competent.
And the only job he seems to do is micromanaging you. He just puts things under a microscope looking for a flaw. He always finds a flaw so in the off chance it breaks he’s always in the clear.
He’s the guy who sticks with the programs the he was taught when he was still at school and never really tried something new out of the box. He gives the reasons the he wasn’t formally trained in the other programs . I’m not talking cinema 4 here. I’m talking Matlab preference over python. Using lab-view as a production level development platform instead of going to something more approved by the industry.
He doesn’t take risk but he pushes those risks on you so if you fail he can say it wasn’t him
He’s never wrong but he’s never right either.
You’re sitting there doing the cunt work and breaking the sweat and he passes the achievements as under his management. You never really get the credit because “he guided you “. You go through hell fixing bugs and he disappears. He says he’s always a call away when what you really needed is someone taking the heavy tasks not throwing the entire project on your back.
I never call that piece of shit bcz he just throws some other bullshit that doesn’t make sense and emphasizes that might be the problem.
I once had a problem with the com port on a pc and was trying to figure out the problem. I asked him and he said that it might be bcz I’m connecting to the PC via VNC. I was like what the hell. What does that have to do with anything. I just ended up restarting the port and it bloody worked.
The saddest part is that I’m scared is that I might end up like him. In the same dead end job. Even though he guides me we work in a place where the job title doesn’t really change. Funny thing is that officially I have the same job title as him .
He’s been in the place for 5years when I came. Can someone imagine that? To work and work and then to be seized up with another brat who’s the same as you title wise.
You’re close the age of 40 and you work in a place where a 20 something year old walks in with the same Position as you.
I worry that I might end up the same if I stay long enough. That I’ll learn everything I can learn and just stop progressing and the only thing I can do is say how shit can break but wouldn’t know how to fix .
Pointing out problems because they are easier than fixing. Just plomonting into existential nihilism with no purpose.
I once told him I wanted to quit. He pretended he didn’t hear it. He then then said what do you see in this job in 5 years
I told him me not in it.
He said “seriously what do you want in this place “
I said “if I’m still her in 5 years I’ll be missing a toe because I would have shit myself in the foot”
I now realize that by convincing me to stay he might have convinced himself that staying for that long wasn’t a bad idea. He was looking for justification that he’s decision wasn’t that bad at all.
You give your life to a job and at the end it takes one away.
I don’t want to be like that and I think that’s what bugs me the most. That I’m so close to this individual that I feel sooner or later if I’m not careful I’ll end up in the same place. The same dread3 -
I went to the movies yesterday and I watched "My Lady".
The only screen of a mobile phone was that of a W10 mobile.
That really surprised me and filled me with joy... 😁2 -
TL;DR Looking to build a tower. Starting as a web dev machine but then home cinema and then maybe gaming rig that works well with Linux.
Firstly really it will be a web dev machine as that is my day job, but later I'd like to
- home entertainment theatre
- probably gaming
- possibly comp sci stuff
Initial budget is somewhere at £800, I think I have a 500 watt psu already, i do kind of want to build my own case to save money, but might be an intense challenge.
So don't know whether to buy a low budget gfx card at first, or whether the on board gfx of a good motherboard will be good enough.
Definitely AMD / ATI as Linux (screw you Nvidia).
I'm thinking ATX form factor, annoyingly I have a micro-atx case but that make it difficult to upgrade so much.
I'm pretty clueless really, I just want something that will run seamless with Linux.
Thanks for any help ranters.4 -
Best debug ever?
Some years ago we had to do a web project as group. It was a cinema like website with backend and front-end.
So in the end we arrived at the presentation and while scrolling the code I found commented out some authentication controls 😅😆 (probably for debug reason lol)
Whatever, meanwhile, while I was talking with the professor two of my mates were whispering... Turns out they found what he mail service wasn't working. And what's best than fix it, push it to the Heroku server and restart all? XD
The professor noticed some little lag in a button and asked "what's happening?"
"oh, nothing we just restarted the server " -
White Bird in a Blizzard. Definitely my favorite movie even though it’s so sad as it reminds me of my own life2
-
17h for 5 Days working on a 3D Animation for an App Award. tough days but it was quite fun. 8/10 would work like a slave again
-
I was ten years old. At this point, despite being in my early 20's, I've officially been programming more than half of my life. From the first moment I knew that this was possible, that we, as software engineers, can do what we do... I've been quite literally obsessed with the idea.
I don't like to give other people credit for the events in my own life, but there is one thing that, more than anything else at the time that lead me down the path of computer science, directly lead me to where I'm at today. If you're at all interested in film and cinema (not to mention programming) then you've undoubtedly heard of The Social Network, directed by David Fincher. Amazing film, I'd recommend it to anyone based off of the film alone, but for me that movie holds a special place in my heart.
My mom took me to see it that movie in theaters when it came out, I would not stop bugging her to take me, there was just something about the founding of Facebook that... Sparked my young imagination. I swear to you that I didn't blink for the entire time I was in the theater watching it. It blew my mind, not only that you could do that kind of stuff with computers, but that you could actually make a lot of money working with computers as well... Ten year old me had different priorities in regards to programming 😂 Starting the moment I got home from the theater, I dedicated my life to learning everything I could about computers. Originally my goal was to, shock of all shocks, create a social networking site for me and my friends to use. I still like to brag about it to this day, but that project eventually became my groups final project in our computer class in Middle School. It was funny, middle school computer class, I had already been programming a few years by that point and was rather proficient in PHP. There were kids submitting literal spreadsheets in Excel as their final project, a few static HTML pages, that sorta jazz. My group and I submitted a full fledged twitter clone, with complete functionality. We got 100% on the project 😂😂
My reasons and interests have changed over the years. For example, I'm not particularly interested in creating a social media application these days, and I don't program because I think it'll make me rich one day (though the hopes always there) but the one thing that hasn't changed since that night I sat enraptured in the beautiful cinematography of David Fincher and facepaced dialogue of Aaron Sorkin, is the complete and total fascination with computers and technology. For that reason The Social Network will forever be my favorite movie.3 -
I just launched movie from some website and apple+ logo show up.
I thought yay I can watch it legally cause I’m subscribed to apple+
I opened apple tv app and I see I can’t watch it right now because it’s in cinema but I can rent it.
Lol, just launching it from website.
I’m not gonna pay twice for movie.
Corporations got no limits.
I’m waiting for someone to figure out you can make people pay to see exclusive movie trailers because we already have behind the scenes series longer then actual movies.1 -
Merry xmas to all
Witnessed the first ever world cup won by my country via cinema.
It can't be any better -
!rant
I have to choose between a couple of optional classes in my course. Although I'm more into the filmography side, I love coding.. now We have a. Umber of optional subjects, and we have to choose two. I have chosen Motion Graphics as one, now I want to know whether I should take Java as a second class.
is it something I can learn on my own like I learnt PHP, JS, Swift? Or is it something that will really require a class?
If it's something I can do on my own, I can consider taking another class related to cinema.3 -
I can't help but keep watching the Yonyx from bigbug demonstrating the fate of humanity if we ever creative artificial life.
That and he's funny as hell :P
Any other amusing french cinema ? I've only seen a few pieces of it including one about two nymphos that go through the film trying to fuck as many people as possible on a train. -
SAD END😭😭
The world of cinema is in mourning as the actor Jason Statham, who plays Frank Martin in the film "the transporter" was shot in his home in New York by thieves who broke into his home.
He wanted to stand against them to protect his family but the thugs were right about him.
He was shot 4 bullets one in the head three in the chest 😭
This all happened around 2:18 am in a movie I watched last night.
SAD END🙄🤫
8
Top Tags
Weekly Rant
View