Day in a life of a JS developer.

Apple’s new iPhone lineup has confusing names:

- iPhone extra regular liquid liquid crystal display
- iPhone extra small
- iPhone extra small maximum

Just spent 4-5 hours debugging a failing staging deployment that was using Bower, among many other things.

Turns out bower has a feature where if any library in bower.json has been deleted, it just hangs, and silently waits for nothing.

Fuck bower, and fuck me for using it in 2014!

Spent 2 days optimizing SQL queries, and then I learned a valuable lesson.

If your database size is bigger than the RAM of the machine it’s running on, every query will take 5+ seconds ☹️

Me annoying our dev:

Me: “Is your npm watch running?”

Him: “Yes!”

Me: “You better go catch it then... 🤣”

Him: “....”

I think we gatta let him go :(

I just hate this shady Apple behavior 😡

They make it look like I’m out of storage, but I still have 20%+ free

A dude with a THICK Russian accent just called me offering server security services.

After I politely declined, he insisted on a free audit of my servers. I declined that as well.

Now I’m backing up our DB’s and going through my nginx logs.

Am I being racist?

Just followed the JavaScript MDN dev docs example to do this:

// Deep Clone
let obj1 = { a:1, b: { c:2 }};
let obj2 = JSON.parse(JSON.strigify(obj1))

Why does it feel wrong to write this code?

My last school used my SSN as the default account password.
Just to test, I used the “forgot password” functionality, and they sent me my SSN over clear text.

As a developer, I see that as 2 mortal sins 😡

You see a web, I see:

CLIENT: TCP SYN
SERVER: TCP SYN ACK
CLIENT: HTTP Get
SERVER: HTTP Response
...
CLIENT: TCP FIN
SERVER: TCP FIN ACK

All I’m saying is that this spider has a clear understanding of Transfer Control Protocol.

As a programmer, all I see is 9 o’clock.

As a programmer I never expected to become a detective.

My today's task: Find out the cause of the spikes, fix it!

Someone posted this to our shared channel. I'm so tired of people thinking that developers "just need to push a few buttons".

Am I crazy for believing that all I can accomplish in 4 hours is read their documentation (or there lack of), and maybe write few tests for the slew of things they'll be asking for??? And maybe, just maybe, get my local environment running.

Why does everyone think that developers know the location of the "magic button"???

What the...

Today I learned what GNU acronym stands for:

GNU = GNU's Not Unix!

😂 why doesn't Computer Science have more acronyms like that?

I do tech support for our platform for real estate agents. Today I got a call from a user saying she can't find her files.

Me: "are you logged into the platform?"

Her: "Yes, but I hate this whole technology thing. Why is it so complicated and unintuitive"

Me: "which part exactly, we welcome feedback"

Her: "when I download my pictures from your site, I don't see them on the desktop..."

Me: "...ummm... have you checked your 'downloads' folder?"

After 5 minutes of explaining how to get to it...

Her: "you see, this is exactly what I mean, why does it have to be so unintuitive... your web site is poorly designed"

😑🔫

Should I just delete her "FREE" account?

I just got the best phone call ever 😂
Has anyone gotten these?

My wife opens a document, writes her entire paper and uses the close ❌ button to save it.

I think I married an adrenaline junkie.

An un-rant on Universities. (UC Irvine)

A lot of my friends and I are about to graduate 👨‍🎓 from UCI, with Computer Science degrees.

Most of them are complaining that they don't know any current frameworks, and all that we learned is outdated.
And that pretty much any bootcamper knows more tools that any of us do.

I totally disagree. I don't think it's the university's job to teach you tools (node, tencerflow, ...), rather, I think they made us into programming Swiss Army knifes. I can pick up any framework (I wanna be a web dev) real easy, and when shit breaks down, I can easily figure out the issue.

I think that's the major difference between Computer Scientists and Bootcampers/Programmers. We know "why", while they know "how".

What do you think? Is the current price of a CS degree worth it?

Google is full of assholes!

Just paid $25 dollars to list my app on google play store. Within 15 minutes of submitting the app, it got de-listed.

Reason:
Impersonation

Who am I impersonating?
The logo is impersonating the logo shown on MY OWN website!!!

How dafuq can you impersonate your own intellectual property?????

Contacted them back using their form. Didn't even call them "cunts". Asked to have it reviewed.
After waiting 7 business days, started sending them 1 email a day. On day 11 I sent 100 identical email asking them to review it.
Today (day 12), they cleared the app. I got this reply back.

"We found that your app was not in violation of our policies"
-Google

Friend asked me, "How does it feel being the CTO of a startup?"

Me: "I feel like the main character in one of those cartoons where train, going full speed, is running out of rail road, so he takes rails from behind the train and puts them in front. And the entire thing is on fire. And everyone you hire is trying to put it out with gasoline."

Friend: "Doesn't your CEO help?"

Me: "Well... He had never seen a train before, and he thought they operate on magic and wishful thinking. And he never realized they need rail track to even run. So... not really"

Friend: "So, it's pretty bad, ha?"

Me: "It's great actually. We just closed our seed round. We're about to launch beta. I might even get 5-6 hours of sleep this weekend 😅"

Just saw this at T-Mobile...

As a php developer, I don't know whether to be proud or sad

I feel like this image perfectly encapsulates the current state of the web development industry. (Image not by me)

!rant

Working on a group project, and this is how my group member writes his "if" statements.

Should I change my group?