How my C programs may as well be written:

#include<stdio.h>
int main() {
printf("Segmentation fault\n");
return 0;
}

Not sure what Linux Desktop to use? Use this handy guide:

- GNOME: when you want no tray icons, themes that break every minor GTK release, and extensions for basic features (that are buggy.)
- KDE: pretty go-Segmentation Fault
- DWM/Awesome/i3/etc.: when you feel like the time you spent learning Vim wasn't wasteful enough
- XFCE: when you want one update per decade and poor Systemd support.
- LXQt: the biggest positive is that it doesn't use GTK.
- Cinnamon: when you like GNOME 3 but you want a different menu
- Deepin: when you want a desktop with the build quality of an HP laptop.

Aren't sure whether to use Xorg or Wayland?

- Xorg: if you want to absurdly fuck up your touchscreen, pick this one.
- Wayland: if you want to screw up most of your apps, too bad; this won't work with your proprietary drivers. If only it did.

What distro to use?

- Ubuntu: if you want to break your system with PPAs, check out this one.
- Debian: when you want Ubuntu except with more out of date packages
- Redhat: when you want Debian except with more out of date packages
- ElementaryOS: wait, someone actually made a properly designed Linux UI?
- Arch Linux: the only thing that doesn't make me sick anymore.
- Slackware: "that exists still really?"
- Gentoo: when you hate systemd more than waiting 4 days to compile Firefox on every release.

... I love Linux. I do. But it is very taxing to get things comfortable for me anymore. I feel like the Linux Desktop is in a period of flux and it's painful to be a part of right now.

After I submitted a code review:

Coworker: What did you mean with this comment?

Me: **translating the comment to Portuguese** Your Footer component isn't rendering any footer element.

Coworker: **blank stare** what?

Me: There is no footer tag here. **points to Footer component**

Coworker: **computing... found approximate result** I'm rendering the Footer here. **shows me where the Footer component is being rendered**

Me: **internal facepalm** Yes, I know, but I'm not talking about that. I'm saying that inside the Footer component you should be rendering a footer element.

Coworker: **segmentation fault** what?

And then I had to explain that there is an HTML footer element. To a mid level frontend developer (or so they say).

HTML is not only divs, for fuck sake.

Good morning, mornin wood.
Good morning, chirping birds outside the window.
Good morning, handsome guy in the mirror.
Good morning, beautiful machine of mine.
Now where were we last night.
Hmpph
😒😒😒 morning segfault

Segmentation fault core dumped

Dev family story

Programmer one-line horror stories? A few off the top of my head:

Segmentation fault (core dumped)

'Undefined' is not a function

Unit test failed: expected '0' but got '-1'

Connection to 'localhost:8080' has been lost

Malformed JSON string at col: 46,372. Expected '}'

What if you 👉🏻🤔
Wanted to go to heaven 😳👼
But god said 🗣👀

Segmentation fault (core dumped) 😭😤📉

Writes code in C
Terminal: Seg fault
Rewrites code
Terminal: Seg fault
Rewrites again, opens gdb:
Seg fault

"I should open a brewery, I like beer. I've always wanted to make beer, it's analogic for the most part. No seg faults, can you believe that? Perhaps even a pub next to the brewery..."

"Oh, I was doing one extra iteration in a for loop. Nevermind"

When you try finding a segfault...

Me always:
*starts coding in C/C++*
*M so gonna use raw pointers... Raw pointers ftw!*
*Spends 2 hours to code*
*Spends next 4-6 hrs trying to find why it is crashing/giving segmentation fault*
*Finally finds the solution and feels like winning a boss in Dark souls*
*Totally worth using raw pointers* 😎😎😂😂

Rant *r = new Rant(jobs.atEnd());
r->send();

Segmentation fault. Core dumped.

Finally program running perfectly 👍
But wait.... Lets add another feature...
New feature needs updated matplotlib...
Update matplotlib😒
Lost support with numpy😫🤔
Updated numpy 😫
Run program again...
Core dumped (segmentation fault)😶😶
Time to leave this planet

'Yay!! My program runs and is giving expected output.'

** Professor gives large input file **

Segmentation fault (core dumped)

'FML'

(My story in every algorithms lab)

I loved her from the beginning.
I devoted so much of my time to her. She told me her heart doesn't point to anyone. Yet I tried to reach her.

Everytime I ask her what's wrong, she gives me the same answer. I tried to be different. I changed things. Yet she said the same thing again today: "Segmentation fault (core dumped)"

Segmentation fault

I was getting a segmentation fault and was very confused and had no idea why and the first thing I changed fixed it totally so that was great

tl;dr:
The Debian 10 live disc and installer say: Heavens me, just look at the time! I’m late for my <segmentation fault

—————

tl:
The Debian 10 live cd and its new “calamares” installer are both complete crap. I’ve never had any issues with installing Debian prior to this, save with getting WiFi to work (as expected). But this version? Ugh. Here are the things I’ve run into:

Unknown root password; easy enough to get around as there is no user password; still annoying after the 10th time.

Also, the login screen doesn’t work off-disc because it won’t accept a blank password, so don’t idle or you’ll get locked out.

The lock screen is overzealous and hard-locks the computer after awhile; not even the magic kernel keys work!

The live disc doesn’t have many standard utilities, or a graphical partition editor. Thankfully I’m comfortable with fdisk.

The graphical installer (calamares) randomly segfaults, even from innocuous things like clicking [change partition] when you don’t have a partition selected. Derp.

It also randomly segfaults while writing partitions to disk — usually on the second partition.

It strangely seems less likely to segfault if the partitions are already there, even if it needs to “reformat” (recreate) them.

It also defaults to using MBR instead of GPT for the partition table, despite the tooltip telling you that MBR is deprecated and limited, and that GPT is recommended for new systems. You cannot change this without doing the partitions manually.

If you do the partitions manually and it can’t figure out where to install things, it just crashes. This is great because you can’t tell it where to install things, and specifying mount points like /boot, /, and /home don’t seem to be enough.

It also tries installing 32bit grub instead of 64bit, causing the grub installer to fail.

If you tell it to install grub on /boot, it complains when that partition isn’t encrypted — fair — but if you tell it to encrypt /boot like it wants you to, it then tries installing grub on the encrypted partition it just created, apparently without decrypting it, so that obviously fails — specific error: cannot read file system.

On the rare chance that everything else goes correctly, the install process can still segfault.

The log does include entries for errors, but doesn’t include an error message. Literally: “ERROR: Installation failed:” and the log ends. Helpful!

If the installer doesn’t segfault and the install process manages to complete, the resulting install might not even boot, even when installed without any drive encryption. Why? My guess is it never bothered to install Grub, or put it in the wrong place, or didn’t mark it as bootable, or who knows what.

Even when using the live disc that includes non-free firmware (including Ath9k) it still cannot detect my wlan card (that uses Ath9k).

I’ve attempted to install thirty plus times now, and only managed to get a working install once — where I neglected to include the Ath9k firmware.

I’m now trying the cli-only installer option instead of the live session; it seems to behave at least. I’m just terrified that the resulting install will be just as unstable as the live session.

All of this to copy the contents of my encrypted disks over so I can use them on a different system. =/

I haven’t decided which I’m going with next, but likely Arch, Void, or Gentoo. I’d go with Qubes if I had more time to experiment.

But in all seriousness, the Debian devs need some serious help. I would be embarrassed if I released this quality of hot garbage.

(This same system ran both Debian 8 and 9 flawlessly for years)

Member *newUser = devrant->members.addUser("KiKoS",20,single);
newUser->newRant.sayHello();

Output: KiKoS: Hello Everyone^*}₩×`₩[`[+₩$#~¤|♡♡
Segmentation Fault
Segmentation Fault
Segmentation Fault

Today, I had a segmentation fault in a data structure, so I wrote a function to test the integrity of the data structure. It worked, and I found and fixed the bug. However, the test still complained about the integrity. After debugging some very strange errors for 5 hours, I discover that there was a bug in the integrity test. The data structure works just fine. FML.

Today I got a segmentation fault in C#.

No pointers. No unmanaged dependencies. Just managed code. Seg fault.

Uhhhh...

My life is a segmentation fault and my core is getting dumped all the time :(

I mean, I really, really like Linux, don't get me wrong but I don't know if it's my Pi or something I've done but I've always gotten issues with it after a few weeks/months.
Everything will flow smoothly until it crashes, and it won't start the x server, and pretty much everything tells me there is a segmentation fault. A fresh install fixes the issue but I also loose all the stuff I've done with my previous install. Really annoying and I haven't found a definitive answer as to why this happens.
Oh well.

My wallpaper at work

I got home from my day job today to work on a side client's project that is due tonight.

Realized I'd left my laptop with all my setup for the project at the office.

Call me crazy but honestly, getting a segmentation fault in C/C++ makes my day joyful

Java or Python guys will never understand the feel you get when you end up getting segmentation fault in C/C++

Sitting in midst of nature with beer in hand and segmentation fault on screen.

WOW :) THAT'S WHAT WE CALL LIFE :)

PS: Although sometimes it's frustrating as hell

back to C after a couple of years. That's way better than I'd expected

I can’t say it’s the most painful but it’s one of my recent painful lessons.

So I’m learning C and in my project I was trying to make a copy of a 2D array and I kept getting seg faults up the ass every time I tried to allocate one of the inner arrays and after a long day of debugging I realized that I was trying to allocate memory within an array that doesn’t exist so I had to create the first array then allocate memory for each inner array after.

From Syntax error in 12th class to Segmentation fault(Core dumped) in college, We all grew up!

WTF IS WRONG WITH ASSEMBLY LANGUAGE?!
I was just modifying an existing program for adding a sequence of numbers from the data section and through console input. I studied the code and started modifying it one step at a time. I needed to modify it into a multiplication program. So I started by changing the ADD functions, replaced the result and buffer registers with bigger size and thought I completed it. WELL GUESS WHAT? SHIT JUST GIVES ME SEGMENTATION FAULT! NOW I HAVE TO REDO THE WHOLE THING! WHY DOESN'T IT TELL ME WHICH LINE OF THE CODE I FUCKED UP AT?! STUPID NASM COMPILER.

Segmentation fault... Nuff said

I'm rewriting a game from C++ to C just for the purpose of learning and adding more features, however; after I refactored the code, the game broke with a segmentation fault and I have no idea where the memory issue is.

I've been debugging for hours now and I've got nothing. FML

compile with gcc, ./a.out: "Segmentation fault (core dumped)"

compile with clang, ./a.out: runs and fails.

compile with cc, ./a.out: Alternated between "Error: Too many arguments" and "Segmentation fault"...

ffs I'm done for the week I guess.
The problem is not that it fails, the problem is that it alternates because of time of compilation, power consumption, random blody oracles or the phase of the moon in a leap year on a Friday the 13th. God.Please.Send.~Nudes~. Help.

Segmentation fault ;__;

I don't know who was the fucking moron who decided how much detail should go in the classic "Segmentation fault (core dumped)" message, but they should be kidnapped and tortured. And no one should tell them why they're getting kidnapped and tortured. Just let the fucker guess.

I never knew that debug symbols, a core dump and gdb would be so powerful to debug

The command line is peak ol' reliable

Every time a Segmentation fault is occuring because of a forgotten "return" or "break" I lose one week of life. Almost out of life right here.

My sleep cycles been reversed ! I am unable sleep all night, and end up sleeping throughout the day.

Segmentation fault: core dumped

Segmentation fault: core dumped

When ever I need to get a passing build quickly...

Lately programs have been crashing a lot on my pc, I've tried different things like disabling SWAP for a sec, BIOS changes, remove firefox and use Google Chrome, try different commands, it kept happening.

Obviously along the way I started investigating what was causing these crashes, looking through bug reports and my syslog. There was no consistency, except for 1 thing: SIGENV. Everything that crashed had a segmentation fault, now I'm not an expect and I don't know what this means or how to fix it, so I went to Google to ask for answers.

Then I downloaded memtest and ran a memory test, error palooza. Then I went to Windows and ran memory check, error palooza.

This is week 3 of this high-end gaming pc which was a huge investment AND IT HAS BEEN FUCKING WITH ME BECAUSE OF BAD MEMORY HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS HAPPEN I ALMOST STARTED TO DOUBT UBUNTU BUT IT WAS A FUCKING FAULT IN BRAND NEW MEMORY MODULES WHAT THE FUCK.

Obviously I'm pissed off. Today I'm gonna call the store that assembled it to voice my complaints.

Thank you for listening to my TedTalk.

That feeling when you’re writing in C and it takes you hours to realize the reason you’re seg faulting is that you neglected a couple of null checks. *facepalm*

Pfft easy: Segmentation Fault.

Segmentation fault
Core dumbed

My own banner is freaking me out 😂

My browser tabs in firefox and chrome crashes frequently in ubuntu? Is there any issue with the memory module, because other programs also show segmentation fault in the crash logs?

Fucking gdb with your stupid commands, showing me the memory allocation, shos me the data you stupid piece of shit, what is the value pointed by the pointer.

*Segmentation fault**core dumped*

Oh gdb! How much I missed you. Please don't ever leave me okay?

>compiling Linux 3DS' zImage overnight
>start compiler at 4PM
>11:54PM -- compiling clang: <file>: conpiler: *internal compiler error*: segmentation fault
okay, well, maybe if we continue make from there it'll fix itself? Might've run out of RAM...
>make
>5 seconds later, segfault again
FUCK

My experience learning C in one simple image

I dont care whether you are segmentation fault or stack smashing or free or some other fucking glitch, as long as you are consistent and reproducible irrespective of platform.

Segmentation Fault and Graphical programming in C when scripting languages are so easy for this!

Another " Segmentation fault (core dumped) " error! I feel so helpless :(

Software has no pre-built packages. Clones repo and tries to compile from source. Spends 1.5 hrs hunting for the libraries - no list published. Configure of course had trouble finding one I had installed; had to debug the configure file to see how it was search for it, turns out it was applying a subdirectory to whatever path I gave it. FINALLY configures and I run "make all". Everything compiles!!! Try to follow documtation to setup the software, 1st cli command -> Segmentation Fault with no logs....

A demon process is running inside me,
whenever I hear your name it's triggers an interrupt to brain,
Causing my brain to stop working and perform a context switching to think about you...
My memories are encrypted by your memories as like wanna cry...
And it demands to always think about you as a ransom...
I tried songs as a patch, But
I found that you memory encryption can't be fixed with any patches...
My heart is not strong as Linux ,
It's so week like Microsoft...
So please don't inject more bugs as my system can't sustain that...
I hope you will also get some disturbance like segmentation fault as you are trying to access my memories..

That moment when you miss a = and you're greeted with a 'Segmentation Fault' or a logical error, and you spend half an hour searching hundreds of lines for some high tech mistake, only to realise it was a freaking missing =.

(imagine all of this said in Undoomed's "hey moron" tone)

Hey, moron, fuckin moron! How about if you're a noob with no actual programmer on your side, you just tell me so we can work it out together, instead of sending a moronic 4page "acceptance criteria" that pretend you know what you're talking about, and then bury me under loads of moronic noob questions that reveal you as thenmoron you are, all of that for a fuckin 50 quid?! I thought it's me being an idiot, not being able to do the task within two days timeframe, but now I see you're just too much of a moron to have any idea how much these things take. And now you nonchalantly mention a one-line one point from the four page document full of drivel, which (loads of moronism credit for me here) i didn't notice amongst all of that other mundane drivel, which actually like doubles the whole workload on the task, but your moronic document, which makes 3 parts of the same algorithm into three separate MILESTONES, makes this whole thing that nearly DOUBLES the workload into a shitty SEVENTH SUBPOINT of the completely unrelated first "milestone"?

FUCK YOU, YOU STUPID ROBBERY CHEAPFUCK, and fuck me for letting myself be tricked by all your fancy wordings that pretend you actually know what the fuck you are asking for, so i assumed you did, so I missed THE POINT, WHICH ACCORDING TO THE SEGMENTATION LOGIC OF THE WHOLE REST OF THE DOCUMENT SHOULD BE 3 SEPARATE FULL-SIZED MILESTONES, NOT A SINGLE SUBPOINT, YOU FUCKING FUCK!

... so much for still trying to at least a bit trust people.

FUCKING DISGUSTING MORONIC CHEAPSKATE FUCK.

and I can't even tell him to fuck off through the rectum he came here because he's all nice and polite so I would be the asshole!

"hey, please, can you build me a house?"
*house is basically finished*
"oh, great job, i love it, but i think you might have missed the fineprint in our contract that says that the house is supposed to stand inside an entry hall of a multibillionaire-sized mansion, so could we please sort that out and add it to the building real quick before i pay you the toolshed's worth we agreed on based on the contract? "

FUCK. HIM.
FUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKSHITFUCKERYFUCKDISGUSTINGIDIOTICFUCKINGFUUUUUUUUCK!!!!!!

i thought i can be a shitty liar and a con man, but this is some next level shit that would be totally beyond my abilities to pull off...

YES I KNOW IT'S MY FAULT I DIDN'T COMB THROUGH THAT BULLSIT "SPECS" OF HIS LETTER BY LETTER TO MAKE SURE THERE'S NO CON BULLSHIT LIKE THIS HIDDEN AMONGST ALL OF THAT MUNDANE SELF-EVIDENT PSEUDO-TECHNICAL DRIVEL, SHUT THE FUCK UP.

fucking disgusting moron, pretending all nice and innocent probably even to himself because he HAS NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT HE EVEN ASKS FOR.

i bet it's one of those pukefucks who get an overpriced contract for 50k without even knowing or caring what programming is, because "i'll just outsource the core functionality of the app for 50 quid to some naiive idiot who lives in the illusion that people are not diarrhorea-worthy pieces of feces, and this other third of the app to some other moron for hundred quid and then i somehow outsource gluing it together to some third poor sod, and that's 49.8k quid of pure profit for me, yay"

and now i'm torn between three options, just cancelling the "contract" with a comment saying "fuck off, you con man", or cancelling it with a lengthy explanation why he's a know-nothing piece of shit who conned me already into having done something worth about 5x more than his shitty "acceptance criteria" requests, or just start conning and bulshitting him back, which won't net me any money, and waste my time, but at least will also waste HIS time, which might be nice because he seems to be on a tight schedule so if i play this right i might have the chance to sink his whole contract which might be mighty nice satisfying...

FUCK THIS, ALL OF THIS, FUCK HIM, FUCK ME, FUCK ALL OF YOU, I SHOULD HAVE STARTED FUCKING OVER EVERYONE RUTHLESSLY A LONG TIME AGO BECAUSE FUCK THE WHOLE WORLD, WHY SHOULD I CARE WHEN NOBODY ELSE DOES, WHY SHOULD I BE DECENT WHEN NOBODY ELSE IS, AND IT ONLY ROYALLY BITES ME IN THE ASS.

stupid fucking lobotomized fuck, IF YOU DON'T KNOW HOW TO DO SOMETHING, DON'T OFFER YOURSELF TO DO IT FOR MONEY AND THEN CON-SOURCE IT TO OTHERS YOU SHITTY BARFPILE!

FUCK.

Segmentation fault.

The point when you mess with memory!

Vlc stops working with a segmentation fault in Ubuntu ...Was working pretty well a week before..
If anymore of this happens..I am gonna wipe ubuntu and install some other OS.. De...Android studio and now vlc...

Fatal problem in weekly rant 4: Segmentation fault
No further messages available
Core was not dump for reasons unknow

I’m new to using gdb to debug. It could detect the places where I was getting SIGSEGV randomly. But there are also rare cases when the program just gets segmentation fault as soon as it starts, and it when that happens, even my gdb gets frozen and I have to shut down my terminal altogether.

What’s with this ? Is this some sort of kernel error (like Bus error) ? I’m using macOS Catalina and gdb 9.1.

He did the mash, he did the developer mash
The developer mash, it was a segmentation fault crash.
He did the mash, it caught on in a pull request.
He did the mash, he did the developer mash

When you're about to get a 20/20 and a little hidden segmentation fault comes and you get 1,5 because of this.

Segmentation fault, segmentation fault everywhere..

Segmentation fault, empty backtrace