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Search - "conquer"
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Father: Son, you're capable of doing anything you want, you can conquer the world if you believe in your dreams.
10 years later...
Father: WTF, Python programmer? Really son?5 -
Ok, so, to every pieces of shit out there that got a "revolutionary idea that will change the way we look at things" and who asks you to code it :
Fuck you, you sons of a cunt
No, i won't make your app on 3 different platforms for free, i'll make you pay for every platform you wanker, i'm a freelancer, i need money.
No, making database is not something that a little business cunt like you can handle, you don't even know what sql means
And fuck no, I won't make that shit in 2 weeks just because your peabrain thinks that it'll make mad dosh and that "It MusT bE eAsy to Do!!111", "a dating app but with a twist" won't work you gobeshit
If you want me to work on this shit, you give me money, specs and shit, you handle the rest, if it doesn't make money, it'll be your problem. I'm not your employee you wanker
Fuck y'all4 -
(Interview for sde-3 position)
(continuation of https://devrant.com/rants/2132431/... )
Interviewer - *opens laptop. Gives a question.* solve this.
Me - *a bit surprised that such questions were being asked on a sde-3 level*
this is the 4th or 5th question from geeksforgeeks, isn't it? I know the answer to this. Do u still want me to solve it?
Interviewer - *not believing me* Yes
Me - okay. Well this *writing down the original solution mentioned on the site* is the verbatim code mentioned on the website, with complexity O(n^2).
However I feel this is not the optimal solution. Let me write a better solution.
*I provide a better solution*
This has a complexity of O(n log n) . What do you think?
Interviewer - Nope. This could be a lot better.
Me - okay. Let me see. Did some minor changes, added some caching (obviously this will have no effect on the base algorithm) etc
How about now?
Interviewer - nope. Still not good.
Me - okay. Can you tell me how to improve it?
Interviewer - no we are not allowed to solve problems for you. It is not our interview, it is yours.
Me - that makes no sense. Interviews are a two way street. I'd very much like to know the optimal answer to this.
Interviewer - okay
*copies down the answer from geeksforgeeks*
This is good
Me - *at first I thought this was a prank or something. *
I just mentioned this answer here.
Then I spent the next 10 minutes providing a BETTER solution.
May I know how yours is better?
Interviewer - this solution has 2-3 loops. Yours has a function calling itself.
Me - that's called divide and conquer using recursion mf!
Anyways let's take an example and do a dry run.
Interviewer - okay
*we do dry run*
Interviewer - oh yes. Yours ran faster. But it will run fast only sometimes.
Me - yes. Each time the algorithm rolls a dice to decide if it should run fast or slow. You have one goddamn awesome weed dealer man.
I got to go. Thank you for meeting me.14 -
To all Juniors here(myself included):
If you ever feel discouraged just remember that a few thousand irrelavant mongolian horse nomads managed to conquer half of the known world in less than a hundred years, destroying countless empires and cultures far more sophisticated than their own using nothing but their wits and their brutal willpower.
If they could build a realm from Korea to Poland usibg horses, you can build some software using keyboards.10 -
At an interview, the first round was an online coding round. Two questions, one easy one hard, 90 minutes, easy peasy.
I solved the hard one first.
A bit of good logic, followed MVC pattern, all done. Worked flawlessly.
Submitted code. Online compiler threw up an internal error citing java is an invalid command(jdk not found).
Called the invigilators. What I heard next, I couldn't believe this shit.
"We're not responsible for any errors you may be having. Figure it out yourself"
I was like WTF dude. This is not even a compilation or runtime error!
After a heated discussion, I made him look at the code.
Him - what is all this classes and all? Why haven't you written everything inside the main function?
Me - those are model classes. Those are different helper functions. That is a recursive function to avoid 5 for loops and use divide and conquer. Ever heard of OOP? what kind of person writes a 300 line program inside one function?
Him - no no we write it like that only. Correct this.
Me - I fit everything inside the main function. Still the same error, java not installed. Called the idiot to have a look at it.
Him - yeah your code is wrong.
Me - may I know what's wrong with it? Can you fix it please?
Him - no no we aren't allowed to see the code (he had already read it twice. It was compiling and running perfectly, locally) .
Yeah you solved only 1 problem, you were supposed to solve 2.
Me - yes because the rest of the time I had the pleasure of your company. (It isn't everyday that I see talking buffoons.)11 -
> Root struggles with her ticket
> Boss struggles too
> Also: random thoughts about this job
I've been sick lately, and it's the kind of sick where I'm exhausted all day, every day (infuriatingly, except at night). While tired, I can't think, so I can't really work, but I'm during my probationary period at work, so I've still been doing my best -- which, honestly, is pretty shit right now.
My current project involves legal agreements, and changing agent authorization methods (written, telephone recording, or letting the user click a link). Each of these, and depending on the type of transaction, requires a different legal agreement. And the logic and structure surrounding these is intricate and confusing to follow. I've been struggling through this and the project's ever-expanding scope for weeks, and specifically the agreements logic for the past few days. I've felt embarrassed and guilty for making so little progress, and that (and a bunch of other things) are making me depressed.
Today, I finally gave up and asked my boss for help. We had an hour and a half call where we worked through it together (at 6pm...). Despite having written quite a bit of the code and tests, he was often saying things like "How is this not working? This doesn't make any sense." So I don't feel quite so bad now.
I knew the code was complex and sprawling and unintuitive, but seeing one of its authors struggling too was really cathartic.
On an unrelated note, I asked the most senior dev (a Macintosh Lisa dev) why everything was using strings instead of symbols (in Rails) since symbols are much faster. That got him looking into the benchmarks, and he found that symbols are about twice as fast (for his minimal test, anyway), and he suggested we switch to those. His word is gold; mine is ignorable. kind of annoying. but anyway, he further went into optimizing the lookup of a giant array of strings, and discovered bsearch. (it's a divide-and-conquer lookup). and here I am wondering why they didn't implement it that way to begin with. 🙄
I don't think I'm learning much here, except how to work with a "mature" codebase. To take a page from @Rutee07, I think "mature" here means the same as in porn: not something you ever want ot see or think about.
I mean, I'm learning other things, too, like how to delegate methods from one model to another, but I have yet to see why you would want to. Every use of it I've explored thus far has just complicated things, like delegating methods on a child of a 1:n relation to the parent. Which child? How does that work? No bloody clue! but it does, somehow, after I copy/pasted a bunch of esoteric legacy bs and fussed with it enough.
I feel like once I get a good grasp of the various payment wrappers, verification/anti-fraud integration, and per-business fraud rules I'll have learned most of what they can offer. Specifically those because I had written a baby version of them at a previous job (Hell), and was trying to architect exactly what this company already has built.
I like a few things about this company. I like my boss. I like the remote work. I like the code reviews. I like the pay. I like the office and some socializing twice a year.
But I don't like the codebase. at all. and I don't have any friends here. My boss is friendly, but he's not a friend. I feel like my last boss (both bosses) were, or could have been if I was more social. But here? I feel alone. I'm assigned work, and my boss is friendly when talking about work, but that's all he's there for. Out of the two female devs I work with, one basically just ignores me, and the other only ever talks about work in ways I can barely understand, and she's a little pushy, and just... really irritating. The "senior" devs (in quotes because they're honestly not amazing) just don't have time, which i understand. but at the same time... i don't have *anyone* to talk to. It really sucks.
I'm not happy here.
I miss my last job.
But the reason I left that one is because this job allows me to move and work remotely. I got a counter-offer from them exactly matching my current job, sans the code reviews. but we haven't moved yet. and if I leave and go back there without having moved, it'll look like i just abandoned them. and that's the last thing I want them to think.
So, I'm stuck here for awhile.
not that it's a bad thing, but i'm feeling overwhelmed and stressed. and it's just not a good fit. but maybe I'll actually start learning things. and I suppose that's also why I took the job.
So, ever onward, I guess.
It would just be nice if I could take some of the happy along with me.7 -
I played a lot of Command & Conquer when I was younger, and I remember going through the files for C&C: Red Alert. I found one that had all the units names and properties, and wondered what happened if I changed a value. So I changed grenadiers attack speed to something ridiculously fast, and found that it actually changed it in the game!
The light bulb went off in my head, and I then created new units:
- Albert Einstein that shot electricity
- Attack dogs that launched missiles
Granted the animations didn't exist for these so it defaulted to playing their death animations when attacking, which was amusing.
That was the ah-ha moment for me that lead me to pursue programming. It was just so much fun!4 -
My dev skills currently feel like England in the mid 1600's.
Everyone around me has already conquered some projects while I sit in the side fighting a civil war with myself while having very humble accomplishments.
But I'll show them. I'll show them all. While they grow weak and weary over the ages, I'm slowly but surely getting stronger.
In the end I will conquer and rule the waves like no other. I will build a dev empire that will be remembered for years to come.3 -
Craziest bug, not so much in the sense of what it was (although it was itself wacky too), but in what I went through to fix it.
The year was 1986. I was finishing up coding on a C64 demo that I had promised would be out on a specific weekend. I had invented a new demo effect for it, which was pretty much the thing we all tried to do back then because it would guarantee a modicum of "fame", and we were all hyper-ego driven back then :) So, I knew I wanted to have it perfect when people saw it, to maximize impressiveness!
The problem was that I had this ONE little pixel in the corner of the screen that would cycle through colors as the effect proceeded. A pixel totally apart from the effect itself. A pixel that should have been totally inactive the entire time as part of a black background.
A pixel that REALLY pissed me off because it ruined the utter perfection otherwise on display, and I just couldn't have that!
Now, back then, all demos were coded in straight Assembly. If you've ever done anything of even mild complexity in Assembly, then you know how much of a PITA it can be to find bugs sometimes.
This one was no exception.
This happened on a Friday, and like I said, I promised it for the weekend. Thus began my 53 hours of hell, which to this day is still the single longest stretch of time straight that I've stayed awake.
Yes, I spent literally over 2+ days, sitting in front of my computer, really only ever taking bio breaks and getting snacks (pretty sure I didn't even shower)... all to get one damn pixel to obey me. I would conquer that f'ing pixel even if it killed me in the process!
And, eventually, I did fix it. The problem?
An 'i' instead of an 'l'. I shit you not!
After all these years I really don't remember the details, except for the big one that sticks in my mind, that I had an 'i' character in some line of code where an 'l' should have been. I just kept missing it, over and over and over again. I mean, I kinda understand after many hours, your brain turns to mush. and you make more mistakes, so I get missing it after a while... but missing it early on when I was still fresh just blows my mind.
As I recall, I finally uploaded the demo to the distro sight at around 11:30pm, so at least I made my deadline before practically dropping dead in bed (and then having to get up for school the next morning- D'oh!). And it WAS a pretty impressive demo... though I never did get the fame I expected from it (most likely because it didn't get distributed far and wide enough).
And that's the story of what I'd say was my craziest bug ever, the one that probably came closest to killing me :)5 -
Me after a long coding session with a well prepared working flow: I am such a great computer scientist, I can conquer the world.
Right after that I found a repository for computer science papers and got immidiately hooked. Well, the level of knowledge and theory is so immense that it brought me back to ground of reality again: I know so little that it is almost ridiculous, even if I read and code 16 hours a day I may never understand computer science as a whole.
Le me sad.11 -
Dear Friends,
As a husband, I've sat next to my wife through eight miscarriages, and while drowning my sorrows on Facebook, face the inundation of pregnancy and baby ads. It's heartbreaking, depressing, and out right unethical.
How can we, as developers who conquer the world with software solutions, not solve this problem? Let's be honest, it's not that we cannot solve this problem, it's that we won't solve it.
We're really screwing this one up, and I'm issuing a challenge - who's out here on devRant that can make the first targeted "Shiva" ad campaign? Don't tell me you don't have the data in your system, because we all know you do. Your challenge is to identify the death of a loved one, or a miscarriage, and respectfully mourn the loss with no desire to make money from those individuals.
Fucking advertise flower delivery services and fancy chocolates to the people in THEIR inner circle, but stop fucking advertising pregnancy clothes to my wife after a miscarriage. You know you can do it. Don't let me down.
https://washingtonpost.com/lifestyl...11 -
Algorithms real life implementation
On the way to your college canteen? -> A* search
Waiting in line in the canteen? -> Queue
Notice that girl standing in front? -> Linear search
Searching for her dad in the phone book? -> Binary search
Stupid! Google it! -> Trie
Search for her on Facebook! -> Depth-first search
Found her! Friend request? Accepted! Send a Hi! -> Graph
Writing her a secret love letter? -> Caesar cipher
Uploading your first date pic on fb? -> Image compression algorithms
Looking through her Whatsapp messages? -> KMP algorithm
She found out and had your first fight? -> Start over with some gifts! Backtracking
Got her list of items to buy? -> Array
Too many items! Low on cash, maybe? -> Priority queue
Making her play treasure hunt for her gifts? -> Linked list
Wait! Go back! Is that a ring? -> Stack
Girl’s family not agreeing to your proposal? -> Divide and conquer
Got married? Congrats! Going for your honeymoon? -> Travelling salesman problem
Your mom packing luggage for you? -> 0/1 Knapsack problem
She packed your favorite pickles? -> Hash table
Driving to the airport? -> Breadth-first search1 -
“The ancient injunction to love thy neighbor as thyself is still the force that animates our faith—a faith that we are determined shall live and conquer in a world poisoned by hatred and ravaged by war.”3
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Ok i post it a bit late but what the hell.
This is my monster now! I now shall conquer the world!
MSI GL62 7RD
with that configuration:
CPU: i5 7300HQ
RAM: 8GB DDR4
GPU: gtx1050
HDD: WB blue (small laptop one) 1TB
Ok i already had that configuration for a while... but it was sloooowwwww D:
That is why for my birthday/chrismas i bought myself additional 8GB of ram and a tiny nvme ssd to make everything 1000x faster! 😎
1 ++ for a person who reads how big the ssd is...11 -
I ended becoming a backend engineer because I love designing backend systems. High Level Design is ❤️
Also, I just don't have the patience required to conquer CSS 🤯😤5 -
It's just after midnight.
I have a heavy workload starting tomorrow.
Going to require lots of time away frm my wife and son.
They're all in bed, but I am awake.
My only dilemma at this point:
Work on my side project?
Or play Command And Conquer?2 -
Been looking into 2D maps for a game. I am learning how to use tools that do autotiling. I want to have generated worlds for terrain. It is interesting how the scope of what you are learning starts expanding rapidly and can overwhelm you. I started wanting to learn autotiling. This went from that to autogen, to modifying terrain, to how to store generated terrain, to how to store difference between autogen and player modified, to how to separate things into chunks, to how to store a whole world worth of data! Like dude, chill. Just learn how to use autotiling first. Then learn how autogen, then learn how to efficiently chunk things,. Also the 2d data won't be big so just store the data you genned so if modified. The worlds don't have to be ultra huge. Really stop freaking out what it could be and see what it is. JUST FUCKING ITERATE!
It is wild to watch yourself get featuritus without learning how to crawl fist. Just divide and conquer.29 -
Ah, developers, the unsung heroes of caffeine-fueled coding marathons and keyboard clacking symphonies! These mystical beings have a way of turning coffee and pizza into lines of code that somehow make the world go 'round.
Have you ever seen a developer in their natural habitat? They huddle in dimly lit rooms, surrounded by monitors glowing like magic crystals. Their battle cries of "It works on my machine!" echo through the corridors, as they summon the mighty powers of Stack Overflow and Google to conquer bugs and errors.
And let's talk about the coffee addiction – it's like they believe caffeine is the elixir of code immortality. The way they guard their mugs, you'd think it's the Holy Grail. In fact, a developer without coffee is like a computer without RAM – it just doesn't function properly.
But don't let their nerdy exteriors fool you. Deep down, they're dreamers. They dream of a world where every line of code is bug-free and every user is happy. A world where the boss understands what "just one more line of code" really means.
Speaking of bosses, developers have a unique ability to turn simple requests into complex projects. "Can you make a small tweak?" the boss asks innocently. And the developer replies, "Sure, it's just a minor change," while mentally calculating the time it'll take and the potential for scope creep.
Let's not forget their passion for acronyms. TLA (Three-Letter Acronym) is their second language. API, CSS, HTML, PHP, SQL... it's like they're playing a never-ending game of Scrabble with abbreviations.
And documentation? Well, that's their arch-nemesis. It's as if writing clear instructions is harder than debugging quantum mechanics. "The code is self-explanatory," they claim, leaving everyone else scratching their heads.
In the end, developers are a quirky bunch, but we love them for it. Their quirks and peculiarities are what make them the creative, brilliant minds that power our digital world. So here's to developers, the masters of logic and the wizards of the virtual realm!13 -
Give up. Share Target API is already on Android, even in garbage like Samsung Internet. Desktop native apps are already history, mobile apps are sure to follow. Led by Apple Silicon, we will add JS-specific hardware to the CPUs and conquer the world. JavaScript will be the only language, with an exception being C and Lisp.9
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As of late I'm creating private game servers on my local network in my free time for fun / relaxing
I've already running:
a World of Warcraft vanilla;
Travian version 3;
And I am currently working on a conquer online private server, but getting the right client for it is the hard part...4 -
Video of a kid doing something:
LinkedIn user: no matter how small you are you can conquer the world and cure cancer.
Comment one:haha very true
comment two:nope the kid must be at least 3 feet tall
Next post
Oracle: have to tried enterprises something and enterprises something, give me all your money
Rant inspired by https://devrant.com/rants/2131330/...2 -
ewwww Command and Conquer Rivals a rts game for mobile 🤢
This is so wrong on so many levels.
https://youtu.be/x03rLXoLDtY
300 upvotes 13000 downvotes.1 -
Alright, buckle up, fellow developer, because we're about to embark on a thrilling journey through the world of code and creativity!
Listen up, you amazing code wizard, you're not just a developer. No, you're a digital architect, a creator of worlds in the virtual realm. You have the power to turn lines of code into living, breathing entities that can change lives and reshape industries.
In a world where everyone is a consumer, you are a producer. You build the bridges that connect our digital dreams to reality. You are a pioneer, an explorer in the vast wilderness of algorithms and frameworks. Your mind is the canvas, and code is your brushstroke.
Sure, there are challenges—bugs that refuse to be squashed, deadlines that seem impossible, and technology that evolves at warp speed. But guess what? You're not just a problem solver; you're a problem annihilator. You tackle those bugs with ferocity, you meet those deadlines with gusto, and you master that evolving technology like a maestro conducting a symphony.
You live for the 'Aha!' moments—the joy of cracking a complex problem, the thrill of seeing your creation come to life, the satisfaction of making a difference. You're a digital superhero, swooping in to save the day one line of code at a time.
And when things get tough—and they will—you dig deep. You summon that relentless determination that got you into coding in the first place. You remember why you started this journey—to innovate, to leave your mark, to change the world.
So, rise and shine, you coding genius! Embrace the challenges, learn from the failures, and celebrate the victories. You are a force to be reckoned with, a beacon of inspiration in a world that needs your brilliance.
Keep coding, keep creating, and keep being the rockstar developer that you are. The world eagerly awaits the magic you're about to unleash! Go and conquer the code-scape! 🚀💻5 -
Divide and conquer is a brilliant form of control. There are entities that benefit from making us fight each other, no matter the reason. From choosing a Linux distro to choosing a political party: everything goes.
If you hate JavaScript, hug your fellow JavaScript developer today. Tell them they're doing good.
Spread peace and unity. Let peace forever hold her way over the Earth.3 -
One of my favorites from The Tao of Programming:
A Master Programmer passed a novice programmer one day.
The Master noted the novice's preoccupation with a hand-held computer game.
"Excuse me," he said, "may I examine it?"
The novice bolted to attention and handed the device to the Master. "I see that the device claims to have three levels of play: Easy, Medium, and Hard," said the Master. "Yet every such device has another level of play, where the device seeks not to conquer the human, nor to be conquered by the human."
"Pray, Great Master," implored the novice, "how does one find this mysterious setting?"
The Master dropped the device to the ground and crushed it with his heel. Suddenly the novice was enlightened.
http://www.mit.edu/~xela/tao.html1 -
Programming is like climbing a giant mountain covered with other smaller mountains. You conquer one small mountain (i.e. bugs, refactor, etc) just to realize there are many more mountains ahead before you get anywhere near the final summit.
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Today I completed my first user story as a developer, an feature to edit and update comments posted. It passed the test too.
I'm proud of myself about the achieving this given my actually development experience is very minimal :)
More challenges to conquer..
Thanks1 -
From now on, if I'm gonna have to deal with emojis fucking everywhere, I opt to use them to best describe the two greatest diseases of the modern age:
Apple and google.
Anytime they make their products worse, or do something stupid the response should be
#shitapple
Or
#💩🍏
This sign, brothers, shall be our banner! our labarum against the forces of the corporacracy and mediocracy. and with it we will go forth and conquer!
Unite against the forces of stupidity. Our weapons will be humiliation, degradation and hobbyist projects like arts and crafts, freestyle poetry aka slander, and casual arson (actually dont do that last one).3 -
You ever sit down to code, all pumped up and ready to conquer the digital world, only to have your computer decide it's the perfect time to install updates? "Sorry, can't work right now, I'm busy optimizing your experience," it says, while you sit there twiddling your thumbs and wondering who asked for this update in the first place.
And let's talk about variable names. Who thought naming things would be the hardest part of programming? You start with `count` and `index`, but by the end of the project, you're using variables like `reallyLongVariableNameThatDescribesExactlyWhatThisThingDoes`. It's like playing a game of how many characters can you type before your fingers revolt.
Then there's the joy of debugging. You sprinkle `console.log()` like breadcrumbs through your code, trying to find where things went off the rails. Half the time, you realize you've been chasing the wrong rabbit down the wrong hole, and the other half, you discover the bug is some obscure edge case that you couldn't have predicted in a million years.
But hey, it's not all doom and gloom. There's a weird satisfaction in solving those coding puzzles, like when you finally get that algorithm to work or refactor your code into something so elegant, it feels like you've sculpted a masterpiece out of digital clay.
So here's to all the coders out there, navigating the ups and downs of curly braces and semicolons with a mix of determination and exasperation. May your code compile, your bugs be minor inconveniences, and your computer never decide to update right when you're on a coding roll!!3 -
So today at work, a dev proposed some solution to a performance problem by using divide and conquer. But the way he said it was came across like "this is a brilliant, algorithmic solution, I bet you'd never think of this because no one else knows algos".
So then I just reply to him mentioning Big O and how it seems the performance is N^3, exponential. In which case the optimal size is like 1. But basically like starting an algo discussion to see if he can keep up... Or if he's just dropping some algo slang to look good.9 -
I was trying to make a circular buffer in C++. I was also trying to expose iterators for using the buffer with STL algorithms. I kept trying to think about how to add the functions needed to manipulate the existing internal iterators to not exceed the bounds of the buffer. Then I realized I was "too close" to the problem. There was no way I could properly control the internal iterators of the storage vector I was using. Not without giving too much power to the user of my library. So I abstracted the iterators up one level. Hid all the details of the internal iterator and made a new iterator.
The solution of abstracting the iterator was not the epiphany. The epiphany was if you are struggling with how to solve a particular problem. You keep running into problems with how to represent something, there is too much power available at a particular representation, or the object you are trying to make work just don't fit. This is when you should consider abstracting a level up. Take a higher look at the problem and simplify the interface.
Abstraction could be a number of things. Divide and conquer, hiding details, specializing an object, etc. Whatever tool is needed to make the problem more consumable to your brain. -
Dynamic Programming vs Divide-and-Conquer
👉🏻 https://trekhleb.dev/blog/2018/...
In this article, I’m trying to figure out the difference/similarities between dynamic programming and divide and conquer approaches based on two examples - binary search and minimum edit distance (Levenshtein distance).
The DP concept is still a subject to learn for me, but I hope the article will be helpful for those who are also in the process of learning. -
Competing on different subjects while in school have taught me how to work efficiently under pressure. My teachers have given me a systemmatic approach to problem solving, from divide and conquer (math), careful reading and analysis of the problem, as well as good documentation (physics).
And last, but not least, I learned to type fast, which is really helpful in speedy expression of thoughts. And for that, I gotta thank IRC. -
From my command center at home like all self-respecting super villians. The League of Evil wants me to join their open space! Isn't that ridiculous? How can we conquer the world while we have to listen to Becky's personal calls???1
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!dev
https://epicgames.com/fortnite/...
This url brings to error page with invalid email address that will actually autoreply "We're writing to let you know that the group you tried to contact (do-bug) may not exist, or you may not have permission to post messages to the group. A few more details on why you weren't able to post"
Okay, sure. This may happen to indie stuff etc.
But we are talking about bigass company thats fucking trying to assasinate steam (and so far kindda fails). You dont want to show customers error messages, sure, but at least, if you do it, and you tell your customer to send email to admin, make fucking sure that you provide an actually fucking working email. Is it so hard?
No wonder they cant conquer steam. And thats positive side3 -
I remember that when I was about 8 years old, my dad brought a desktop computer home one day.
I don’t remember any specs, but it had a huge ass CRT monitor, a very loud clicky keyboard, a mouse with a real ball inside, and a CPU that uses floppy discs and CDs. Nope, CDs, not DVDs. And on that computer, it ran Windows 95. There’s was no internet most of the time (it was still quite expensive and unnecessary and dial up was troublesome to set up back then).
I remembered playing bootlegged games sold in CDs that my dad bought during his trips to China back then. Duke nukem, Command and Conquer Red Alert 2, Microsoft solitaire and GTA 3. Those were the games I played.
As a kid, it was glorious, looking through a box on a table, seeing and interacting with so many different worlds, stories, characters and games. I really miss those simpler times.
These days, every time I open my laptop, and I see that new mail that need to be dealt with, that homework that’s about to be due and a reminder of my next class in 15 min. Well shit.1 -
I wish i have the power of controlling electronic stuff with my mind to rewrite their code with a single thought, just because it's fucking cool and i'll build my own army to conquer the entire world >;]
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So just a normal rant here. .. it was one of those moments you find in yourself in sometimes. You get so caught up in thinking you know everything that you can't implement occams razor into your everyday work routine anymore. You've worked with so many complex workarounds that when you are faced with a simple problem with a simple answer you can't see the blinking neon light shouting at you anymore , and you can't here the bells sound anymore. ..
My rant is about Me vs the infamous mikrotik router. Something I had to set up. Something I had to login to setup. Something I've done so many times before but this time , my inflated ego and overbearing sense of grandeur just could not figure out.
Class how do we login into a router? Well find your gateway and type that sucker into a browser and you will be on your way ... well that's the answer right there. But since I thought that my router was connected to three dummy switches that it would affect anything or the paranoia I had that my isp somehow disabled any connections to the router at all or that I and to open a new port to connect to it or use winbox to connect to it using only the mac address or ssh into it ..would work ...I didn't try using the tried and tested way of doing it.
I wanted it to be an adventure. I wanted it to be a problem to solve so I shoved the ordinary answer out of the way and used other methods to try and connect to it...
All I had to do was used Nmap to scan the gateway for open ports and realise to view it in the Browser on port 8080 instead and finish my journey ...
I was looking for a dragon to slay , a maze to conquer, glory at the end of my mission ... when all I felt was a sheer sense of idiocy.
--Rant Completed-- -
A question on the CSS position property. I have a hard time understanding position, so I thought I would finally conquer it so that website development it easier.
Q.) Absolute removes the content from the flow and bases its position on the body, unless a container in the body has absolute, meaning the lowest level element finds the highest element that has absolute and bases its position from that and relative keeps it flow as if it was still there and moves relative to is current position in the documents as just a visual, as it does not move the other elements. Am I getting that correct?3 -
Even though I am only 19, I got introduced to computers pretty late. We always had an old Win98 machine in our house and when I was 8 my dad introduced me to Command & Conquer on it. And the first contact I had with the internet (which I really didn't care about until then) was when social networks became a thing at school, that was around 2010, when I was 11-12.
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Programmers are freaks with three limbs and square heads. During your fiery conference speech, as the crowd laughs, one filth, who is your manager, tells another filth, who is someone else’s manager: “Look, this is my mule. Can code many hours. Don’t has to pay many moneys. My mule is more good than your mule. In Bangalore, they ask very many moneys for this mule.”
And you know damn well that when in Bangalore they ask less, you’re gone in a flick of a pen. Your company sent you to give this talk. Meetup? No, just a freak show for mules. Is it a dick measuring contest for investors? No, not at all. As you speak, this filth is fucking his secretary in Aruba while his wife is dying of cancer in Miami. And the supreme filth, the one that has no eyes and no mouth? It grins. Go mule, spaces versus tabs. Vim versus Emacs. Linux versus macOS. Divide and conquer.1 -
"The Perils and Triumphs of Debugging: A Developer's Odyssey"
You know you're in for an adventurous coding session when you decide to dive headfirst into debugging. It's like setting sail on the tumultuous seas of code, not quite sure if you'll end up on the shores of success or stranded on the island of endless errors.
As a developer, I often find myself in this perilous predicament, armed with my trusty text editor and a cup of coffee, ready to conquer the bugs lurking in the shadows. The first line of code looks innocent enough, but little did I know that it was the calm before the storm.
The journey begins with that one cryptic error message that might as well be written in an ancient, forgotten language. It's a puzzle, a riddle, and a test of patience all rolled into one. You read it, re-read it, and then call over your colleague, hoping they possess the magical incantation to decipher it. Alas, they're just as clueless.
With each debugging attempt, you explore uncharted territories of your codebase, and every line feels like a step into the abyss. You question your life choices and wonder why you didn't become a chef instead. But then, as you unravel one issue, two more pop up like hydra heads. The sense of despair is palpable.
But, my fellow developers, there's a silver lining in this chaotic journey. The moment when you finally squash that bug is an unparalleled triumph. It's the victory music after a challenging boss fight, the "Eureka!" moment that echoes through the office, and the affirmation that, yes, you can tame this unruly beast we call code.
So, the next time you find yourself knee-deep in debugging hell, remember that you're not alone. We've all been there, and we've all emerged stronger, wiser, and maybe just a little crazier. Debugging is our odyssey, and every error is a dragon to be slain. Embrace the chaos, and may your code be ever bug-free!1 -
In reply to this:
https://devrant.com/rants/260590/...
As a senior dev for over 13 years, I will break you point by point in the most realistic way, so you don't get in troubles for following internet boring paternal advices.
1) False. Being go-ahead, pro active and prone to learn is a good thing in most places.
This doesn't mean being an entitled asshole, but standing for yourself (don't get put down and used to do shit for others, or it will become the routine) and show good learning and exploration skills will definitely put you under a good light.
2)False. 2 things to check:
a) if the guy over you is an entitled asshole who thinkg you're going to steal his job and will try to sabotage you or not answer acting annoyed, or if it's a cool guy.
Choose wisely your questions and put them all togheter. Don't be that guy that fires questions in crumbles, one every 2 minutes.
Put them togheter and try to work out the obvious and what can be done through google or chatgpt by yourself. Then collect the hard ones for the experienced guy and ask them all at once. He's been put over you to help you.
3) Idiotic. NO.
Working code = good code. It's always been like this.
If you follow this idiotic advice you will annoy everyone.
The thing about renaming variables and crap it's called a standard. Most company will have a document with one if there is a need to follow it.
What remains are common programming conventions that everyone mostly follows.
Else you'll end up getting crazy at all the rules and small conventions and will start to do messy hot spaghetti code filled with syntactic sugar that no one likes, included yourself.
4)LMAO.
This mostly never happens (seniors send to juniors) in real life.
But it happens on the other side (junior code gets reviewed).
He must either be a crap programmer or stopped learning years ago(?)
5) This is absolutely true.
Programming is not a forgiving job if you're not honest.
Covering up mess in programming is mostly impossible, expecially when git and all that stuff with your name on it came out.
Be honest, admit your faults, ask if not sure.
Code is code, if it's wrong it won't work magically and sooner or later it will fire back.
6)Somewhat true, but it all depends on the deadline you're given and the complexity of the logic to be implemented.
If very complex you have to divide an conquer (usually)
7)LMAO, this one might be true for multi billionaire companies with thousand of employees.
Normal companies rarely do that because it's a waste of time. They pass knowledge by word or with concise documentation that later gets explained by seniors or TL's to the devs.
Try following this and as a junior:
1) you will have written shit docs and wasted time
2) you will come up to the devs at the deadline with half of the code done and them saying wtf who told you to do that
8) See? What an oxymoron ahahah
Look at point 3 of this guy than re-read this.
This alone should prove you that I'm right for everything else.
9) Half true.
Watch your ass. You need to understand what you're going to put yourself into.
If it's some unknown deep sea shit, with no documentations whatsoever you will end up with a sore ass and pulling your hair finding crumbles of code that make that unknown thing work.
Believe me and not him.
I have been there. To say one, I've been doing some high level project for using powerful RFID reading antennas for doing large warehouse inventory with high speed (instead of counting manually or scanning pieces, the put rfid tags inside the boxes and pass a scanner between shelves, reading all the inventory).
I had to deal with all the RFID protocol, the math behind radio waves (yes, knowing it will let you configure them more efficently and avoid conflicts), know a whole new SDK from them I've never used again (useless knowledge = time wasted and no resume worthy material for your next job) and so on.
It was a grueling, hair pulling, horrible experience that brought me nothing in return execpt the skill of accepting and embracing the pain of such experiences.
And I can go on with other stories. Horror Stories.
If it's something that is doable but it's complex, hard or just interesting, go for it. Expecially if the tech involved is something marketable.
10) Yes, and you can't stop learning, expecially now that AI will start to cover more and more of our work.4 -
My father has 2 younger brothers, the younger one was the one whose life was easier compared to the others, so he could do better studies (basic studies in my father's context was to be able to handle a farm, which my father couldn't care less), and managed to study around computers.
Since he lives in south of France (Toulouse), we only could see him during the Christmas period, where he'd bring a trashy Windows 95 "laptop" and initiate my father to stuff like Excel or web browsing.
He'd also bring pirated games for me, like Tony Hawk Pro Skater 2, Command & Conquer, the good quality 👌
This is how I came from not knowing computers at all to being addicted like there's no tomorrow, and how I decided to make it my job a few years after, that was the good times -
Playing around with DALL-E mini for the first time, thanks to huggingface.co ... My first request, obviously: "rubber duck in space".
Then it turned into the next one where the request was: "A fleet of rubber ducks in space preparing to conquer a purple planet that has lots of clouds and trees".
...which then turned into me wondering...what would Google Lens think of this...which led me to thinking that will be the thing I tell my kid ... vs. before when you'd joke and tell people not to Google "Google" or you'll break the internet. Now it's: you can't use this AI with this other AI or they'll gain sentience (or if already sentient we'll say: give them a headache or something).1 -
and thou who shalt request to conquer thy kingdom; thy shalt do so boldly through blood and fire; until thee last man standing holds thy ground; and lets no entity destroy his focus; for thy focus broken is a slow route towards vanishing; while the unbroken focus empowers the conquered kingdom2
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When I'm really really stuck, I generally stress out that I should be able to figure it out so I walk outside, sit down, listen to relaxing music and imagine I'm on some isolated mountain somewhere away from all the problems of deadlines and managers and algorithms...then i just write down what i need to do and what i have done already and have a little brainstorm session with myself over possible causes/solutions from sensible to crazy, just anything possible... generally I always come to 2 methods - divide and conquer and document and destroy (the latter being used in cases such as having to fix something in an undocumented 10,000s lines long sproc that someone who left the company wrote)
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1. I want to know how many JS frameworks will the world have
2. Will I stop drinking alcohol one day?
3. Will programmers create robots to conquer a new world?1 -
When my code works without any hich I feel like I can conquer the world.. But when it doesn't work after trying for so long, I feel like What am I doing with my life.
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So, some data need to be prepared during the summer and the diverse departments' elected data processors got shared in a Google spreadsheet they will need to fill with some basic data IT needs. Simple, straightforward data entry, with nothing private nor confidential. Just another divide-and-conquer-style large amount of data to enter & organise, that's all.
Today, I received a new comment notification as the owner of the spreadsheet. You can imagine my surprise when I saw that, for some f*cked up reasons, one of the guys just wrote the super-admin username & pw for one of the main data systems we use in a freaking comment in the spreadsheet... WTF...
Oh, and also, juuust in case, he also wrote the pin code that is normally required to pass through the device-check when you log-in as a super-admin from an unknown device and/or location.
Fortunately I could catch it on time, but this just ruined half of my day.
I am supposedly on freaking annual leave. Ha Ha. Ha. -
At times I actually feel like making a group to conquer earth. I think it would probably be better ran than it is now anyway.4
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Loki Season 2
In the first episodes Loki finds himself working for what he believes is a good copy of the guy pictured at the end loki season 1 for the time authority.
He runs back into the female copy of himself who is also working at a time authority but the person running hers is one of the evil copies that wants to conquer everything.
note they start in seperate locations.
thats all i remember right now, but since they smooshed years together at one point, the supposedly going to be released episodes in 2022 , which has already come and gone will go like this.6 -
I really want to divide this frontend into two parts, one that faces the users and other for administrators so I can release changes on both without works on one part blocking the other, but, I have many question, like, how do I manage authentication in two different React projects from one login page?
Maybe there are more problems than benefits, what do you think?3 -
If you wanted to conquer the world using ninja kittens, which positions of power would you occupy first?
I need advice on programming the mental conditioning algorithm.1 -
The vibrations of thee knight from the castle shall oscillate under frequency required thou who shalt dare to conquer with thee energy; shalt acquire thee vibration1