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Today I was 25 years old, asking for a raise or a opportunity to reach the next level of my career.
My department manager simply said:
"I'm sorry, but in terms of salary you have already reached the end of your career."
Bye then :)34 -
Fuck me, big fucking security flaw with a UK internet service provider, my head has gone through my desk and hit the floor it’s that bad.
23 -
What the fuck Apple, I thought selling a monitor stand separately at £999 was bad, £360 for putting fucking wheels on your Mac Pro, fuck me.
I had no fucking clue how to tag this, hence why it’s got 3 categories to it
11 -
So we got our first household Alexa yesterday and my brothers have been asking it silly things, like:
Brother: Alexa sing baby shark:
Alexa: <sings baby shark>
B: Alexa sing mummy shark
A: <sings mummy shark>
B: Alexa sing daddy shark
A: <sings daddy shark>
B: Alexa sing grandma shark
A: "I think that's enough, even I have my limits"
Fucking Brilliant!!!4 -
Just had Windows pop up with a notification saying “We’ve turned on storage sense for you”. Love it how the default is “When Windows Decides”. Was that why countless users lost their data back in October 2018???
I think I’ll turn that off permanently 😂😂😂
4 -
#1 life lesson learned from coding:
Don't work on projects for the government or any authority EVER!6 -
I’ve only just been able to catch up with the UK news and the government missed ~16,000 cases of COVID-19 over a 7 day period due to a “technical glitch”.
The “technical glitch” was the government using an excel spreadsheet that reached the data limit.
Who the fuck thought that was a good idea long term, that’s why databases exist!!!!9 -
I’ve had enough of shitty ISPs. Time to shame them 😈
Here in the UK, we have a company called TalkTalk who treat their customers as whores by not giving a shit and taking all their money.
I have had an ongoing issue for about 9 months now where our internet is more unstable, but also slower. We pay for 72Mbps at which we used to get, but now our internet tops out at 30Mbps if we are lucky. It can be 20Mbps one minute and 7Mbps the next, and I’ve had it drop below 1Mbps for no goddam reason.
I’ve spoken (well, argued) argued to their so called customer service department over phone and live chat explaining the situation and all they’ve done is said “restart your router”, or “we’ll send out a new router, it’s probably a WiFi issue”, or some bullshit like “I’ve ‘changed’ something on my end”. On one conversation with a so called technician, I had to explain how networking actually worded, and and even called a 7Mbps acceptable when we were paying for 10x that!!!!!
The thing that makes it worse is they actually have systems that detect any issues with customers internet lines, but they only alert the customer to the issue through an online portal, telling the customer to call up and get it dealt with rather than passing the info to a tech department and having issues fixed without the customer knowing unless it’s absolutely necessary.
So 9 months in and I still have a fluctuating, unstable internet connection which is slow and overpriced with no tunnel in sight. GIVE ME BACK MY GODDAMN MONEY YOU FUCKING THIEVING BASTARDS.3 -
When creating auto incrementing integer keys on a MySQL database, please mark then as unsigned, you don’t need a negative primary key 😞😞😞4
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What developer/team thought that this would be a fucking brilliant option to put in this in a game?
Btw there is no VSync option, just “Limit to 30 FPS”
11 -
2nd rant this week on PHP PDO
PHP 💩:
PHP message: SQLSTATE[HY000]: General error: 2014 Cannot execute queries while other unbuffered queries are active. Consider using PDOStatement::fetchAll(). Alternatively, if your code is only ever going to run against mysql, you may enable query buffering by setting the PDO::MYSQL_ATTR_USE_BUFFERED_QUERY attribute
Me 🤬:
THATS WHAT I’M FUCKING USING. STOP FUCKING COMPLAINING. YOU DIDN’T LIKE THE FUCKING COLONS FOR YOUR FUCKING PARAMATETRS, NOW YOU HATE YOUR OWN FUCKING FETCHALL() METHOD YOU PEICE OF SHIT, AND YOU CAN’T HAVE ANY OTHER ACTIVE QUERIES AS IT’S THE FIRST FUCKING QUERY. ARRGHHH!!!!!
What the actual fuck is wrong with PDO. It bitches about everything 😡.8 -
Only just noticed that CSS has variables - when the fuck did this happen and where the hell was I when it did!!!!6
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So our city’s bus service provider has decided to update the software for their “iPoints”, I think they haven’t thought this rollout through.
7 -
No wonder why Google Chrome takes up alot of RAM when running, I've just seen chromiums dev requirements:
System requirements
- A 64-bit Intel machine with at least 8GB of RAM. More than 16GB is highly recommended.
- At least 100GB of free disk space on an NTFS-formatted hard drive. FAT32 will not work, as some of the Git packfiles are larger than 4GB.
- An appropriate version of Visual Studio, as described below.
Windows 7 or newer.8 -
What dumb twat decided to commit a change with the message “FUCK”. And it not just one, it’s 10 or more in a fucking row!!!!!
Thanks, that’s really gonna help me understand what was changed 😡5 -
Just been told by someone that they think that Megabits (Mb) is the same as Megabytes (MB)... FUCK SAKE🤬🤬🤬😞😞😞
I want to put my head through my keyboard, through my desk, and through the 3 floors below me. I’m so god damn triggered right now6 -
Over a year ago I posted a screenshot of chrome vs edge, and chrome had 92 processes consuming 2.1GB RAM vs edges 19 processes consuming 3.2GB RAM
Just seen this... WTF google, how can you need soooo much ram, I thought you had fixed your high memory issues!!!
22 -
CI CD pipelines in my company... Having CICD suppose to help development... Now we have countless templates and tools (github actions, circle ci, agro, aws beanstalk, azure pipelines, serverless, terraforms, cloud formation, helm charts, ECR, Vault... and few more).
Total chaos, doing simple CICD for 1 api and 1 lambda took 3 days so far, and will take bit more.
On top of that, no one have idea which part of scripts are doing what exactly, as responsibilities are in different tools (each tool have different config files).
Does deployment have to be so complex? Or is it that my company DevOps team makes it so unnecessary complicated?4 -
Why does Windows have to be so fucking useless when running docker. Everytime i need to make a change to the NGINX container, I have to restart the docker daemon, rather than rebuild and restart the container.
I would be doing this on Ubuntu, if I could install it that is.8 -
Why does the css border-spacing have to be different in how it takes 2 values.
If you look at margin and padding properties when passing in 2 values, you pass in:
margin: (top/bottom)px (left/right)px;
However, when using border spacing:
border-spacing: (left/right)px (top/bottom)px;
I know I’m simplifying here, but it’s goddamn irritating how it’s takes in vertical and horizontal spacing the other way around. Who the hell thought that was a good idea4 -
1. I have Animal Crossing
2. My internet can drop to 0.8Mbps
3. I have Animal Crossing
4. My internet can drop out 10 times a day
5. I have animal crossing
6. My office pc is my gaming rig
7. I have... I think you get the gist1 -
Love it when you have a SQL query that takes 6.3 seconds (which includes processing time) to execute, and you managed to convert to a process that takes just 0.072 to complete1
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One of my commits today:
“Corrected a file path for view as it’s causing issues within the live environment”
What I actually wanted to put:
“Changed letter to uppercase in file path for view because live is being a fucking bitch about it”
Why do my Dev and Live environments have to differ 😞, I kept my cool though, which is a first for me 🙂4 -
Can we have a Moment of silence please
https://sebastiandedeyne.com/moment...
I only found this library a couple of months ago and instantly loved it as it made working with JS date so much easier.
Sorry for the pun btw, i couldn’t resist 😂7 -
In college doing A2’s, working solo. Building a companion app for Trivial Pursuit bet you know it edition. Laptop got hit by virus/malware, stopped me from copying files, lost 2/3’s of my project 3 days before submission.3
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me: builds a python-script to transport data in .json-format into a config-file written in .xml for a coworker
my boss: "I am glad you have earned yourself a reputation as the 'programmer' in our team" -
I'm at a bit of a loose end here, I'll do my best to explain and I hope it all makes sense.
I'm trying to find a way to wrap a C++ Console App in a C# Class so I can use the C++ App as a library within the C# app rather than triggering the C++ exe and providing a command to it.
The reason why I wish to do it this way is for maintainability, so I can make changes to the C++ app without affecting the C# App.
I've been looking at tutorials and stack overflow to see if's its possible, but for someone with learning difficulties, I'm struggling to find the right path to take as I'm seeing conflicting info.
Any help would be greatly appreciated, Thanks in advance5 -
Erm, instead of trying to guess my gender, just put “Dear <first name>” and leave it at that. It’s actually quite insulting
13 -
I’ve just fired up Ubuntu for the first time in a couple of years on a laptop while doing some data recovery. I use windows and Mac in a daily basis.
I’m tempted to switch, I forgot how much I missed Ubuntu1 -
Why does the Fat Free Frameworks (F3) $db->exec() method have its array count from 1 and not 0.
Instead of doing:
[$param1, $param2]
You have to do:
[ 1=> $param1, 2=> $param2]
WHO THE FUCK THOUGHT THAT WOULD BE A GREAT IDEA?
This is something that PHP PDO gets right, AND I FUCKING HATE PDO!!!4 -
Can this week be over now(), it's been an absolute nightmare in terms of development. I just want to sleep.1
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Fucking hell... If I knew that PHPStorm could display the same file over 2 screens/windows, I’d have used it sooner. 😡
It is a godsend though 🙂7 -
Google's "Mobile Friendly Test Tool" is shit.
It does its automated test's during it's index and points out that there are various issues with the page and IT IS NOT mobile friendly.
So I go and test the page in the Mobile test tool to see what other error's it's reporting and it comes back and says "This page IS mobile friendly".
Like WTF Google, make up your fucking goddamn mind and stop pissing me about.1 -
Can anyone suggest a good TS based stack to use with electron? I'm (hopefully) looking to make an open source app3
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So I was instructed today, after lunch, to spend an hour teaching a member of my team how to SSH, store keys, basic io routines, and create CRON jobs to auth our ECR registry by my team lead.. Why am I wasting dev time teaching someone how to use an operating system? Need I add, our primary Dev workspace is a spun up using vagrant using xubuntu. I just can't comprehend how this person has been using xubuntu as their primary OS for two months and doesn't know the SSH protocol. Much less how they landed a dev job without any prior experience with a *NIX based OS.2
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Had a debate with a colleague today over git commits, I had 24 outstanding and he had 15. We came up with a little game...
Who can create the most changes for a single commit. The winner is the one who can remember what each change was without looking at the changes.
Needlessly to say, we both lost 😂 -
imagine the guys in the datacenter are switching out power distribution units - and suddenly your productive database cluster reboots :)1
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Clock: Friday, 15:45 PM - just go home now, idiot!
My stupid ass: Makes substantial changes to the code I have been working on and breaks it.4 -
Me to my peer: "Yo the code that they sent us works but it sucks and is insecure"
My peer: "Yo that sucks they should definitely change that, go submit a ticket so they change it up, that really sucks!"
Me: *prepares ticket, gets it checked by peer:
My peer: YOoOoO U cAnT tElL tHeM tO cHaNgE oR tElL tHeM hOw tO wRiTe tHeIr CoDe ThAt ThEy DeLiVeR tO uS!1!1!eleven
--
classics1 -
AWS ECS UI wasn't designed for machines or humans.
Created a task/service/cluster with default suggested Roles.
Service task fails to get image from ECR repository using the said permissions suggested in the docs defined in the default roles.
You only had one job. 😠
How not GTD. -
So apparently in MySQL, 0 doesn’t always equal 0, sometimes it can be 1, or 2, or 3...
what the actual fuck?!?!5 -
A project where there was no templating at all and every page was independent of each other, it was that bad I started from scratch.
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There is nothing worse than trying to program while having RSI, it’s either you have your wrist support on and type slowly and hit multiple keys, or you have it off, type slowly and live with the pain3
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Why is PHP PDO such a b*tch to work with?
One minute it says it’ll accept one query via one method for one insert but then deny the next query you give it, all because of “:” within bindParam() -
So we are testing slack as our new messaging platform, it states that the platform has 10k searchable messages, does that mean that you can send unlimited messages with 10k searchable, or 10k messages total before you have to start paying?5
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so one time (yesterday), I was playing phantom forces console edition (a game on Roblox) and this IDIOT started sweating with a ppsh-41, I was so pissed and angry so I started using the Beowulf ECR and I was losing, my team was losing super badly. Until the match switched to Warehouse, when it switched to Warehouse, I beat his ass like a drum. I got a 3.14 KD, 22-7.
He sucked and deserved to take that L, fuck that man. -
Sometimes, just sometimes, I need to stop programming until nearly 10pm. It cannot be healthy for the body.
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Sat on a bus heading home next to some guy who clearly hasn’t got knowledge of how to use a pair of fucking headphones and it sat playing a fucking game with the volume on loud, and all I can hear is the same fucking “whoosh, ping” noise fucking over and over again or he’s watching those shitty videos on Facebook
IT’S DOING MY FUCKING HEAD IN!!!!!! GET A PAIR FUCKING HEADPHONES OR MUTE YOUR FUCKING PHONE!!!!! NO-ONE WANTS TO HEAR THAT SHIT!!!!!2 -
Trying to find a function I swear I had created to retrieve a set of counts from a database. Couldn’t find it. What I could find is the comment I had written with the function being completely overwritten with something entirely different.
I’m a complete fucking idiot and thank fuck for version control. -
So as part of my news years resolution, I thought id build an app and I thought I would build it in vue.js and native script with a shared codebase, I've started with a fresh project and already I have an error, one that I've not caused, this is in router.js. see if you can spot it.
module.exports = (api, options) => {
require('@vue/cli-plugin-router/generator')(api, {
historyMode: options.routerHistoryMode
};
export default new Router(options);
}
When I've fixed the syntax error, I then get, the error:
/src/router.js: 'import' and 'export' may only appear at the top level (5:0)
This is when I run "npm run serve:ios"
if anyone has encountered this, please let me know how you fixed this.2 -
My first experience with a computer was actually sitting on my dad's lap and watching him play world of warcraft - and damn, that hit hard1
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Can any one recommend a good Go framework for APIs with a MongoDB ORM?
Was using Laravel 6/Lumen but it’s API ability is starting to piss me off with its CSRF crap, JWT/Passport implementation and a it’s lack of MongoDB support.
I don’t need any templating engines at all, its all handled by a SPA and Mobile Apps6 -
Why is the prettus repository package shit at handling mass inserts. The documentation says:
$this->repository->create(Input::all())
WTF does that even mean.3 -
How the fuck is this even possible Microsoft, apparently one line of code breaks web browser sandboxing on all chromium based browsers.
https://slashgear.com/windows-10-19...3 -
I am a stupid monkey that spilled coffee all over his keyboard, and now it seems to be EOL.
Looking for some "inspiration" - what keyboards (and mice, might also just buy a whole new set) are you guys using?9 -
So working from home due to UK Gov lockdown. iTunes on, and the perfect power anthem comes on... Productivity up 110%
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imagine you "manage" your applications firewall rules by writing them into spreadsheets and sending them to the fw-admins to implement them
imagine they don't implement exactly what you tell them / implement rules for you that you did not ask for
also imagine it is crucial that you have a reliable source of information about what firewall rules are and are not implemented for your application, because the firewall-guys cant simply check and tell you what rules are implemented for your application
:o2
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