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Search - "lazy af"
I'm the biggest dumbass, the laziest procrastinator I know of..
Joined devRant in June 2017, got eligible for the stickers in a week's time, sent a mail requesting them, but never received it. Given the size of our community, I thought I'm way behind in the list and probably receive them in few months. After a year, I totally forgot about it.
But, the colossal stupid that I am, had also lost the key to my mailbox (the physical one). I never cared about the lost key, because who sends post these days !!!
When I finally got a duplicate key for my mailbox after 2 years, guess what I found.. a first class international mail from devRant which arrived on July 2017 🤦♂️🤦♂️🤦♂️, couple of weeks after I originally requested
But, yay... I finally got them..17
I had to install a program whose setup file size was 3GB and I already had that setup in my pendrive, but my pendrive was in the other room so instead of going there and bringing that pendrive, I re-downloaded the setup.
My other room is hardly 5m away12
>Be me, have doctor's appointment
>Call in late for work
>Assistant asks to put in pupil dilation drops before checkup
>Have to wait half an hour before solution settles
>Already late and this sucks
>Squeezes lemons in my eyes. Lemon with a 's'
>Wait for 15 minutes and next round of lemon squeezing
>r/InstantRegret for visiting doc
>Half an hour and cannot see anything in short sight
>Doc checks by penetrating laser in my eye
>All good but feel giddy
>Doc says I will not be able to see in short sight for at least two hours
>Panic mode on
>Somehow boards first bus
>Switch to next bus
>Traffic and blindness kills
>Just one stop before, bus gets into terrible accident
>A kid hurt badly
>Alight and catch auto-rickshaw
>Low on cash but reach office late
>Still blind af
>10000 hours later barely able to see
>Navigate holding side bars
>No work all day
>Regret coming to office
>Eye sight returns
>Sees crush and gets triggered like always
>Spend time with office bro
>Panic mode off
>Passes time and leaves for home
>Reach home and post the story
TL;DR: what a shit fuck lazy day.48
It's been 2 weeks now..2
Junior dev: asks me an easy question cuz he's too lazy to figure it out
Me: listening, thinking he's gonna waste my time again 😓
Senior dev: eavesdrops and helps him out
Me: saved me, woohoo 😎
*Few minutes later*
Senior dev: "by the time you finished asking this question, you could have compiled the code yourself to see what happens"
Stop bitching about having to write comments, they are important whether you like it or not. Trust me nobodys code is "that good" 😒4
I used to work in a call center for a local hospital.
One night, all of our lines are swamped. Literally no time for a break between phone calls, +15 minute wait times. I answer the next call:
Me: "Its a marvelous Monday at AskIT, how may I help you?"
Doctor: "This is Dr. [Noone Care]. I need you to fix my password now."
Me: "Absolutely! You should be able to enter a new password now."
Doctor: "MY HANDS ARE NOT FOR PASSWORDS, MY HANDS ARE FOR SURGERY!"
😩 So glad I don't work for doctors anymore. Oh and the best part is, he had selected the general phone queue, rather than the doctor queue (~3 minute wait time instead).7
Laziest thing!!!??? You better ask me when I was not lazy. Framework here framework there, library here library there.
npm install 29282818 packages
I’m the embodiment of lazy...
I had turned on the TV in the living room earlier and put on sesame st. for my daughter to watch.
Some time passes, I’m trying to work in the back bedroom, have daughter in my arms and she’s falling asleep. I forgot to turn off the TV in the front room.
Didn’t want to get up from my desk so I just wrote up a powershell script to connect to the computer plugged into the TV and kill chrome. (The Computer sleeps after 10 minutes, and the TV shuts off after 10 more minutes of no display signal).
Script was successful as I heard Elmo laughing, then suddenly all was quiet 🤫7
programmed a three page website at 2 am in my room, on my phone, because i was too lazy to walk to the next room and get my laptop7
Today, I reached a new level of laziness.
I lied down to watch a movie and I was too lazy to copy the movie from my external hard drive which was in the other side of the bed.
What did I do? I've downloaded the movie once again and watched.3
I think I need to get away from web development...
Honestly, no grudge held against web/mobile development itsef... But the projects, the teams, the workflows... It's always shitty af.
I'm fed up with the bad architecture, poor management decisions, unmaintained legacy code, broken windows, arrogant juniors, arrogant seniors, code smells left to rot, the freaking red door... Hell! The fucking "we don't have time for that" answer to testing... Damn!
Been there done that.
Feels like it's always the same crap and unfortunately, it's rare to start a professional project from scratch.
Fucking angular, broken piece of shit.
Fucking react (& RN) community modules, broken pieces of shit.
Fucking lazy-ass node developers.
Fucking ES and fucking garbage proposals submitted to the TC39.
I wish I could do Haskell / Rust / Clojure professionally... I could even enjoy Go with a good team... Anything but that huge pile of dogshit JS and its community of brainfucked so-called developers.15
Honestly, mentoring is in my opinion the best part of the job. My firts mentee was a student in my last job, smart af but lazy and unable to trust in herself. I wasn't really too sure in myself at the time either but since I had to teach hery craft there was no place for me to doubt myself.
So I taught her everything I knew and in turn I learned to trust myself and once I had mastered the art of self confidence I could make her believe in herself. Since then I trained five more test automation engineers, some of them might be close to surpassing their 'master' (though won't make it easy for them 😏) and with every Single one I've developed a deeper understanding of my craft by explaining. I needed to research stuff I never questioned to answer their questions and therefor became better at what I do.
Three weeks ago I got an email from the girl I first mentored, she's in another company now and she thanked me for what I taught her. In my opinion I did a rwally Bad job at it (it was my first time teaching) but reading someone actually believing that one made an impact in their life is something special.
I always loved talking about my craft and I love sharing the knowledge I aquired. Test automation is not a thankfull craft but I'm always happy whenever I can interest someone in it and I fully enjoy seeing them grow and improve into fully fledged TAEs.1
Guy I work with messaging me: Hey could you check my SQL syntax to get the date part for the month and year.
Me thinking: Ughhh this is going to be something stupid I know it. Why doesn't he just check it himself?
I check it... 2 queries that are very, very, very... simple... and similar except one returns last year (2017) and the other returns the current year (2018)
Me: Not sure what your issue is... I'm not getting any syntax errors. They are executing
Him: Well it shouldn't show 2017, it should show 2018
Me thinking: learn to debug you lazy fuck
Me: Well you're adding a -1 to your year...(Not sure why your even adding to it if your just getting the current month and year)
Him: Oh you're correct! That makes sense
Waste of my time2
How to force your self to write unit tests for your personal projects:
1. Go to a public place
2. Forget to bring your phone cable & never install a simulator because you are lazy af
An example of today's generation:
My little cousin 22 years old wants to get into BI Dev. I tell him to read a certain book. The book has practice examples and various things that are hands on.
What does he do?
He READS the book and is like, "ask me any question and I know the answer". So I'm like, "fine, what's the structure of a basic SQL statement?", after some hard thought he's like, "SELECT * FROM?" I'm like, "ok.....how would you filter that?" and he's like, "you got me man........no clue".
What didn't he do?
I mean.........come on.3
Boss wanted me to make changes in company's website which was based on wordpres s.
I knew it could be done by tweaking some JS code, but I have very less experience with wordpress
But wordpress is easy man(Internet told me).
Give me 5 minutes, you will see the changes in production.
Being lazy af I directly logged in to ftp, checked out some files, updated some code, I was good to go.
Before pushing it, I opened the website and it was GONE ٩(๑´0`๑)۶
Now there was no public_html in the root.
I was fucked. I have accidentally deleted the website that had no backup.
And the best part I was on leave from
I was looking everywhere for backups, looked into google cache to get the contents. I have to recreate the complete site now.
Just when I was asking questions on choice of my profession and simultaneously looking here and there in FTP for backups,
I found the jewel "public_html".
It happens out that I have accidentally moved the folder to some other directory.
Moved it back to root. Site was up and running.
Reassured myself that I deserve to be a dev.
Backed up complete site, made the changes.
And the best part, amount of wordpress I learned in those three hours was way more than I could have learnt in many weeks.
Lessons Learnt :
A) ALWAYS keep backups.
B) You SHOULD NOT make changes on prod directly
C) You become superhuman when your brain know you are going to be fucked 😂3
How do you reply to multiple people in a rant without having to mention their names explicitly?
Click reply on the first person, go back, click reply on the next person, go back and so on!7
Am I the only one who is just to lazy to order devrant stickers even if my posts have enough upvotes? :D
Don't get me wrong i love stickers!7
I've been BSing my skillset for so long to myself, it's a veritable toolbox of mixed knowledge but no complete sets...
I wonder if it's too late for me to catch up or if I will ever actually complete any learning...
I am yet to finish learning
ASM I can do i386 but not x86
Pascal if you can believe
My main skill is basically just remembering anything I do, including code syntax and example code fragments well enough to quote at people which makes me a lazy learner.
When a job portal of a company wants your current and permanent address (I still don't know why) and EXPLICITLY wants you to type your address all over again, coz they are the SAME DAMN THING, makes me wonder if I should apply to the company at all.4
I setup my local server so I can test my apps and to mount my partitions on my www folder in a folder named "mnt" with numbered folders for each mounted partition
So I can access and download my files to phone and other devices from all over the network :)
And even watch movies that are in my computer on my phone or tv
And when I want to sleep I usually watch a movie or one episode of series which is stored in my pc ,on my phone by this method in my bed 😅
So the thing is I'm too lazy to get out of bed and shut down the server and pc
So I setup this file so I can run commands on my PC from my phone 😅😂😂😂
Me vs. Code Moocher:
CM: Hey, did you do the Chapter 6 homework?
Me: Did You...?
CM: Yes... (with confidence but an odd pause) But it doesn't work.
Me: Sorry I'm not done with it either I can help you.
I hate people like this. He could've asked me for my help or waited to ask the Prof.
But he outright asked for my work. It wouldn't be the first time.
FIGURE IT OUT YOURSELF MOTHERFUCKER!!!4
Anyone else ever not feel like explaining something technical to someone in a different non-technical department or position, so you use a lot of techy terms and make it sound really confusing so you can move on with your life?1
days ago i used to be very lazy about writing tests.. after forcing me doing it, I ended up being addicted to high line coverage... kind of satisfiying AF
Colleague from a remote office emails me to ask what version of some tooling is installed on a build machine. Generally I wouldn't mind, but for the fact they're literally sat next to said build machine in the remote office. I mean... why get up and look yourself, when you can just IM somebody to look for you... right?
So today I wanted to keep going in my project, did nothing in the morning had to do market and came back tired (didn't sleep enought last night) so tried to rest (couldn't because had to help in the kitchen with the lunch), had lunch then take a nap, nap evolved to a nice sleep, woke up @1600, got out to deliver a ddr3, came back @1700, wife asked to get burguers for dinner... went to buy dinner, watched a movie (gold) has sex... and now I'm writing this rant'... so coded nothing... now I'm playing bf4 just because fuck it I'm not sitting in my desktop now....
So have you ever wanted to do something in your project and couldn't because external reasons didn't allow you?9
Am I the only one always comming up with solutions for problems not programmed yet, being curious whether it works but being too lazy to actually implement and test it?2