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Do any of you guys or gals sit outside and code?
Since 2009 this has been my primary work place (even in the cold and rain), I go to the office for mostly non-coding work and have a pc inside for serious sessions but I'd say 80% of my heads down dev time is spent sitting here. A little quirk is when people call or Skype me they'll immediately say "I can hear birds in the background, where are you??".
Anyway, I'm moving soon and thought I should share while I still can ☺️21
"You can teach my son to code. He doesn't like typing so just use that mouse thing (track pad). He's got an idea for an app (Flappy Birds clone) that'll make millions. It needs to be done tomorrow for his school computer project."
I really hate this company.
The code is a disaster. Every single other employee is a salesperson. Nobody has any bloody clue what I do or how difficult it is. They don't care about stability (unless things are crashing), maintenance (until crashing), code quality (until it delays features), or anything apart from shiny new features they can sell. The boss (the king salesman, if ever there was one) doesn't know how to manage, but tries to by acting like his "nice asshole" self -- he's an asshole that gives you passes, makes sure it's bloody obvious that he's doing it begrudgingly, yet everything is still absolutely your fault. If he arbitrarily decides it's too much your fault, he stops being "nice" and flips out on you in front of everyone. That's a "nice asshole": an asshole who can barely even pretend to be nice.
And you know what? I really hate having to work next to these fucking birds, too.
Today was our weekly conference call, and I was both late and unprepared. I was too focused on my work, and got a ping 4 minutes into the meeting, so I obv didn't have time to prepare. Boss was also pissy today, and I didn't have much to show for my week, thanks to lots of little "OMG NEED ASAP" shit projects that all took too long, pushing back what I was actually supposed to work on. Which didn't get finished, of course, and today that project was "the most important" -- I suspect simply because it wasn't finished. AGADJFSKL. Cue the birds fucking screaming and never fucking shutting up no matter what I did. Blanket? No effect. Spray bottle? SCREAM MORE! Boss was yelling at me, the birds were screaming, and I couldn't think. Goddamn fucking disaster.
and yes, we have a macaw. A macaw and over 20 cockatiels. Said macaw decided today was a lovely day to just fucking SCREAM non-stop, and the tiels were doing their best to keep up. Thinking clearly during this cacophony? Not gonna happen.
Wait, "go elsewhere," you say? Somewhere quieter? Where is this "elsewhere?" We live in a fucking tiny house, and during the call it was (and still is) filled with sleeping people, and surrounded by a fucking desert. Who the fuck thought living in the desert was a good idea, anyway? Like, seriously. What brainless moron thought "You know what? This is a great place! Let's settle down right here," while trudging through the scorching sand and dust, looking at the basically lifeless horizon filled with large, hot, dry, dusty, barren rocks (aka "mountains"), and fucking dying from thirst? Probably someone so delirious from heatstroke they never actually recovered, and continued raving that it's a goddamn paradise to their heat-addled imbecile followers. I really hope they hallucinated a la-z-boy in place of a hedge of teddybear cholla and died an excruciating and prickly death. Fuck that guy/girl, too.
But I digress.
I seriously need an office that isn't a 30 min drive into gang-central. I'd work outside, but I live in the middle of the bloody fucking desert, and get heat exhaustion within about half an hour. Everywhere else in the house people bother me almost incessantly.
just. FUCKING FJASKLDFJGAG.
I HATE THIS PLACE SO SO SO MUCH.
'I've had such Zen lately,' Alex said. Maybe then, but lately? I've just been too exhausted and burned out from putting up with all this shit to get angry. Days like today? I could pour kerosene over everything and laugh as it all just burned to ash.15
What if we developerized our proverbs?
1. A bad developer blames his tools.
2. Code speaks louder than comments.
3. Birds of a text editor flock together.51
The moment I saw a bird laying on the balcony, unresponsive, I dropped everything.
The balcony has glass walls, which the bird hit pretty hard against. It (I don't know the gender) was disoriented, shaking, and totally out of it.
It was almost night, and I can feel a few drops of rain, a sign of, well, more rain.
So I took it in, did some research, left it inside a quiet dark box with a heating mat on the bottom. It slowly calmed down. We slept overnight, listening to the rain outside, thinking about what would've happened if the bird hit, let's say, somewhere else.
It would've not have any help, or care whatsoever. It would die slowly, having a concussion and oh my gosh my efforts doesn't matter anyway this is the way of life there are bird striking windows everyday and I can't help it Holy noodles I should remove windows from every computer in the house...
I was like this the entire night.
The next morning I discovered that the bird was awake, but something was wrong. The bird was still disoriented. Then I discovered something. Gosh, how did I miss it?
The left eye was completely swollen, which had caused the imbalanced walk, which means that it could not fly.
(*Rapidly typing on phone*) come on where is the nearest wildlife rehabilitation centre....
Initially I thought that the bird just needed to recover, I was wrong. It needs professional help ASAP.
To the SUV! (https://myinstants.com/instant/...)
We went to the other corner of the town. Seriously, we were at the southeast part of town, and we have to drive to the northwest.
It took 15 minutes, but we finally got there. I dropped it off and got home. I will never see that bird again in my entire life.
I don't know what will happen to it.
Good luck out there, little bird.
So... That was my weekend. Here comes Monday...7
During the first rocket fly to the moon, they developed a calculator for the rocket scientists to calculate the flight.
Today's smartphones have the power to do the calculations for dozens of rockets at once, and what do I do with it?
I PLAY ANGRY BIRDS4
Recently buyed some toilet paper.
Now i just want to have an intense discussion about floating point precision with the idiot who developed the cutting machine...
Also, please stop printing cars or birds there. Thanks.3
My brother made a PC game for his game dev class.
You are a hamster with a hammer
- acorns drop and u crack them for points
- you have to avoid rolling logs and eagles that swoop down
- the game gets faster
Dad: I just played the game, I think it has potential like Angry Birds, can you convert it to Android?
Me: no and no
Dad: why and why?
Me: **facepalm and takes a deep breath**
Explains why very simply and that I'm not a game dev... And if he thinks it's that good, go pay for a freelancer...6
Rovio, the company behind Angry Birds, are scumbags.
When you progress to a certain level, they offer you a cool new thing — to hatch an egg. You click “hatch”, and then you have to wait 24 hours. This builds excitement — after all, it looks like an amazing new mode, and you can't wait to see what it is.
The reality is, you hatch this beautiful little creature. From here on, you have to FEED it regularly, or it will die. They drew it the cutest way possible. How should a child resist feeding this cutie? When I hatched it, I didn't know what this new mechanic was, and I assume new players don't know either.
You feed it apples. You can find apples on certain levels, but they are scarce. The further you go, the more apples are required to keep him alive. Play the game actively to keep up with it and get apples! Or, you could just… I don't know… BUY them.
“Mom, I need $11.99 to feed Fluffy, otherwise it will die!”
A straight-up scumbag fucking mechanic in a game targeted to impressionable children that will have a hard time seeing this tiny beautiful creature die of starvation. Let's guilt-trip kids into asking money from their parents!52
Good morning, mornin wood.
Good morning, chirping birds outside the window.
Good morning, handsome guy in the mirror.
Good morning, beautiful machine of mine.
Now where were we last night.
😒😒😒 morning segfault3
Almost ever day I am the first one at office in the early morning. Other devs arrive at least one or two hours later. I don't mind. I just want to have a bit of sun left, when I go.
But why the heck...everytime I go, one of those other fucktards (which I normally really like), mumbles something like "you go this early today?"
Yes I do you dipshit!! You could arrive earlier, too!
And then, those late birds get credit for staying longest!!!
I mean, sure... If you start to work at 11pm, you have to stay long...
I didn't know that the colour of the Chrome offline game changes once you have reached a certain score. Also these birds are annoying.14
My first job was actually nontechnical - I was 18 years old and sold premium office furniture for a small store in Munich.
I did code in my free time though (PHP/JS mostly, had a litte browsergame back then - those were the days), so when my boss approached me and asked me whether I liked to take over a coding project, I agreed to the idea.
Little did I know at the time: I was supposed to work with a web agency the boss had contracted to build their online shop. Only that he had no plan or anything, he basically told them "build me an online shop like abc(a major competitor of ours at the time)"
He employed another sales lady who was supposed to manage the shop (that didn't exist yet). In the end, I think 80% of her job was to keep me from killing my boss.
As you can imagine, with this huuuuge amout of planning and these exact visions of what was supposed to be, things went south fast and far. So far that I could visit my fellow flightless birds down in the Penguin's republic of Antarctica and still need to go further.
Well... When my boss started suing the web agency, I was... ahem, asked to take over. Dumb as I was, I did - I was a PHP kid and thought that Magento, being written in PHP, would be easy to master. If you know Magento, you know that was maybe the wrongest thing I ever said.
Fast forward 3 very exhausting months, the thing was online. Not all of it worked yet, but it was online and fairly secure.
I did next to everything myself, administrating the CentOS box the shop was running on, its (own) e-mail server, the web server, all the coding required for the shop (can you spell 12 hour day for 8 hour pay?)
3 further months later, my life basically was a wreck, I dragged myself to work, the only thing I looked forward being the motorcycle ride home. The system worked though.
Mind you, I was still, at the time, working with three major customers, doing deskside support and some admin (Win Server 2008R2 at the time) - because, to quote my boss, "We could not afford a full time developer and we don't need one".
I think i stopped coding in my free time, the one hobby I used to love more than anything on the world, somewhere Decemerish 2012. I dropped out of the open source projects I was in, quit working on my browser game and let everything slide.
I didn't even care to renew the domains and servers for it, I just let it die without notice.
The little free time I had, I spent playing video games and getting drunk/high.
December 2013, 1.5 years on the job, I reached my breaking point and just left, called in sick at least a week per month because I just could not see this fucking place anymore.
I looked for another job outside of ALL of what I did before. No more Magento, no more sales, no more PHP. I didn't have to look for long, despite what I thought of my skills.
In February 2014, I told my boss that I quit. It was still seven months until my new job started, but I wanted him to know early so we could migrate and find a replacement.
The search for said replacement started in June 2014. I had considerably less work in the months before, looks like he got the hint.
In August 2014, my replacement arrived and I got him started.
I found a job, which I am still in, and still happy about after almost half a decade, at a local, medium sized ISP as a software dev and IT security guy. Got a proper training with a certificate and everything now.
My replacement lasted two months, he was external and never really did his job - the site, which until I had quit, had a total of 3 days downtime for 3 YEARS (they were the hoster's fault, not mine), was down for an entire month and he could not even tell why.
HIS followup was kicked after taking two weeks to familiarize himself with the project. Well, I think that two weeks is not even barely enough to familiarize yourself with nearly three years of work, but my boss gave him two days.
In 2016, the shop was replaced with another one. Different shop system, different OS, different CI. I don't know why and I can't say I give a damn.
Almost all the people that worked at the company back with me have left for greener pastures, taking their customers (and revenue) with them.
As for my boss' comments, instructions and lines: THAT might not be safe for work. Or kids. Or humans in general. And there wouldn't be much left if you put it through a language filter...
Moral of the story: No, it's not a bad thing to leave a place if you're mistreated there. Don't mistake loyalty with stupidity!
And, to quote one of my favourite Bands: "Nothing matters when the pain is all but gone" (Tragedy + Time by Rise Against).8
Drinking good whiskey, listening to Chopin and birds singing, looking at moon.
I can do it for the rest of my life.3
You know, as much as I love computers and technology, I sometimes get sick of staring at a computer screen (especially at work). I just wanna hang out in a park and read a book, for as long as I want, while I relax to the sounds of birds chirping and the breeze of the wind as it brushes through leaves.7
BIRD OWNERS. If you live near ANYWHERE with fireworks, few or many, just a friendly yearly reminder that the smoke from those fireworks will destroy your bird's respiratory system. KEEP YOUR WINDOWS CLOSED. Do not underestimate how dangerous that smoke is for them.
Happy new years everyone!12
Just finished my first programming project and I couldn't be more excited for what's to come in the future 😄 also it's 3:30 and I've got class at 8:35...6
This night I dreamt that I could build indexes (yeah, boo me on the plural) for relalife things..trees, buildings, birds.. Everything gets an index, Oprah style!!!! And once last month I also dreamt I could debug real life things.. Look at the person and see what's wrong with them.. All their stats, bugs, everythiiiiing!! So disappointend when I woke up :(9
So now we can have bird everywhere on our avatars, there should be some mask option for bird head, just like in Team Fortress 24
Fucking pigeons and birds in general. They all don't want to move their asses when I drive lol.
Do they all want me to squeeze the shit out of them?!
Wtf is wrong with them?
I'm waiting for them to slowly pass by my car, but others would maybe not show the same patience.8
00h - "Let's just try to finish this one feature..."
Suddenly you hear the birds singing and the traffic starting out there, coming from that little sunshine.1
Sunday morning. The sky is blue, the birds are singing, my computer is booting up because I have work to do.
God I wish it was legal to kill people... Taxi driver stopped outside the building.. on the street, not even parked, bur there are many empty spaces that he is also blocking - which would be another issue with these assholes during the day time..parking in the street, going to get some coffee, not the takeaway.. they sit on their fat asses and watch you struggle to park a car cuz it's a narrow street..
And now he's blasting music at full volume.. It's fucking 4 am!! 04:04!! Friggin birds aren't even up yet!!
Fuck you!! One day that it's not extremely hot here and I could actually sleep..and now I can't cuz this asshole woke me up with music.
Just die you sad excuse of a human being!!12
How can you call yourself a code if you live in a city and never experience the outdoors, trees, birds, life. I do it all the time and it gives me so many more ideas and concepts to include in my coding.
2 birds, 1 stone...
Thanks @dfox for the awesome and much anticipated stickers. Still not decided where they're going, but probably on my MacBook Pro.
Here's my humble setup, @localhost3
Devs: Early birds or night owls?
Me: Definitelly night owl, can not wake up before 10 and sometimes working till morning. I know it is bad for health but I can not help myself. Being much more creative and productive at night.12
You know you're up too early if all you can see is
- null persons
- one car
but you hear
- a quadrillion birds squatting
'YOU HAVN'T FINISHED THIS TASK'
on your way to work 😭2
Some birds told me Galaxy S9 is really good.
Googled it, and found something more interesting.
PS: this is the 3rd largest mobile server provider in NZ
Use development code in production.
Nice work guys!2
Remember my rant about angry birds guilt tripping kids into asking money?
Well, Fluffy is slowly dying! Now it looks distressed and begging for food.16
I want an tv series for developers, like "painting with bob ross" was for painters. "Oh i made 3 bugs. Oh dear. Lets make them birds now, yep they are birds now"3
The team leader call us for a serious meeting, and he wants it to be productive,
Leader: "we shall not procrastinate anymore. We don't have time left. We should not just talk random bullshit like we did the last few times. Aight?"
We all agree to be productive.
We also set a few main subjects and decision to be discussed. Then, we all get into the meeting room seriously. In a meeting, we try the idea of the upcoming project. But we suddenly went off topic. Then, My friend talk about L4D2. Then we start playing. And, I say, why not try some GTA5? I proudly reboot my expensive laptop from Ubuntu to Windows and playing GTA. Then, we start spotify and talk about song.
We laid in the sofa and talk sexually. My friend introduce me his favorite AV and we compare our manhood's size.
It was 4am already. One by one the attendee fall asleep.
It is lIke... the survival gamr of sleepiness? xD
Only my best boy friend and I were left awake, talking about ourselves, watching the beautiful midnight city.
Then, 2 of us ourselves start to talk about project idea. It is something cool and crazy to think about, like a friend making app. The 3 hours of brainstorming is gay and romantic.
"Okay, so we have the outline. let's sleep, baby" So we sleep till the noon. We wake up. Some left. Some were still sleeping. The birds twitter in the bequtiful skyline.
I did not forget to upload my idea to discord after going home in the morning. End of the meeting. Barely any goal was met in the meeting.
Those days, we make attempt of productive meeting again and again but end up procrastinating everyday. We had meeting in a small bedroom and it was our meeting room. We played different songs, tasted different wines.
And, finally one day, my friend say "I feel that it is much productive to work alone in a separate room. So we won't get distracted by each other."
Another friend: "yea..I know it is harsh... but yea... true... let's work alone"
I almost eant to cry. But we cannot indulge ourselves in the moments of dreamy romance.
We should start real work and don't be gay.1
@dfox, @trogue I think with the birds, tigers, glass tables, monitors, and other toys in the avatars now. It's time for a new cartoon of the chaos and destruction that ensues when the pets fight!
Who's with me?2
The joys of bring a Fullstack developer..
Sometimes beings junior Fullstack developer I find myself in tricky situations.
This past week I was invited to a meeting with all the front-end developers where we were presenting our software when a 500error popped up...( I was day dreaming looking out the window watching two birds hop around)Then I heard one developer ask what the problem was and another quickly replied "backend problem"... Still half asleep and deep in my new found interest in birds I blurted out "maybe the front-end is not sending the request properly".... Immediately the room fell silent... this sent a chill down my spine and I was brought back to reality, I looked round the room and everyone was staring at me like I insulted their mothers... I tried to make a joke of it but saying "Sorry I forgot this was a front-end meeting"... The lead architect who for some reason was also present then said "at least someone sees things differently"... And everyone laughed (although I'm not sure how sincere their laughs were).1
Thirty birds went on a journey to find their god Simurgh whose name was set in stone. After insane challenges and hardships they found out that the word Simurgh meant "thirty birds".2
Hey @dfox, @trogus, the birds on the shoulder are super pimp, but would you be interested in making a parrot? You know, to go along with a Hawaiian shirt, an eye patch, and a pirate hat?
That'd be metal af \m/\m/13
So I'm on my morning stroll. Walking, enjoying, watching the world around me.. It's nice how cherries blossom. They smell very tempting to stop there and enjoy the moment. Some flowers under the cherry...
Why do plants blossom again? Oh yeah, that's right, to exchange some speciments in order to grow fruit and seeds. To have their offspring. Just like every other living macroorganism [with a few exceptions ofc]. Life has no other way to survive but to exchange genetic material between two parties and only then trigger growth of the new life.
And that is a very strict rule. No more, no less: it takes exactly 2 organisms to make new life. But why is that? If my memory serves, theory of evolution says that life is like business: cut the losses and let the profits run. Over time it discards everything not required for the organism in order to save energy, and only successful new "investments" remain in the genome. The unsuccessful ones die before they proliferate, so the bad genes shall not survive.
It also says that very simple things, very simple changes lead to very complex outcomes. Us. Life.
But what is simple about life having to need 2 other lives? Exactly 2. It's either simple or efficient, depends on perspective. BUT IT IS NOT BOTH. Look at cells. They just split in half and multiply. Dead simple. It takes one of them to make another one. But with mammals, birds, reptiles, plants and other macroorganisms [excpt fungi] this is not the case! Why?!? I can't think of any scenario where two generic microorganisms, following some dead simple mutations, would come up w/ something that inefficient and overly complex. Like they're living on their own, multiplying by division, and smth very simple happens and they can no longer divide, only mate in pairs. The primitive, efficient and simple mechanism gets terminated and replaced with a different one, incredibly complex one!
Sure, we have protozoa which have similar reproductive mechanisms. They exchange genetic material to multiply.
But look at our, human cells. They dont need that! Look at some reptiles, some plants that only take one to make another. They don't pair as well! It's simple. Efficient. Why do protozoa need 2 for the species to survive?
It's not simple and efficient [tho helps us adapt, but its not my point for now]. See, things like this make ne wonder. What if we, the life, are not as accidental as we think? What if this whole mechanism was set off by someone or something billions of years ago? That's mean there are much older, much more superior cognitive organisms than us. What if protozoa was version 3 of new life [the first two did not survive]? Viruses - v2? Sea creatures - v3, reptiles - v4, and so on until they came up with us, mammals? That'd surely mean we are not alone in this universe. Are they watching us? Will they create a new species any time soon? What's our purpose, are we just an experiment?
And so, from cherry blossoms to existensial dilemma, my stroll is over. Time for breakfast :)1
Why are companies so biased against employees those who come late and work late as compared to those who come early and leave early?
Why is it okay to leave early but not so much to come late instead?
After some of us ignored repeated warnings, we've been told that anyone come after 10:30am will be marked half day absent.
So, if they do so, I'll sit there in office playing Fifa or Table Tennis, and not work until the second half starts xD
The reason for such biasness is that the daily stand-up is at 10:30, even though more people wanted it to be after 11. They even took a vote. And yet it was ignored (funnily initially more ppl voted for 11 initially and somehow some of the votes changed for in favor of 10am... Now slowly, because half the team wouldn't be on time, it's shifted to 10:30am.
And funnily, I'm already serving notice period in this company.8
A continuation to https://devrant.com/rants/2629107/...
Again the idea is bird/flock of birds.
Thanks to all the people who gave their opinion last time around.21
This was shit funny.
One morning, one of my colleagues got a direct call from project architect that he has to setup a meeting to explain in depth the project he has been taking care of for months and prepare a presentation and send an invite. Two weeks later we are all invited to this meeting. This colleague acting as host of this meeting prepared for few days on the PowerPoint and also a well crafted demo. Then as the architect joins, this colleague starts speaking about his role and the project. Within a minute, the architect interrupts him and says 'shut the fuck up, I don't think you are ready yet for this meeting maybe we need someone more learned...so hmm....let me explain it'. And this architect then uses his PPT for sometime and then pulls up a whiteboard and draws birds and spiders telling every time to see system in it.
My colleague is screwed to shit and is incapable to speak when closing the call.
Later ahead 4 weeks, his PPT is retouched and recoloured and attached to a Wiki page created by a unknown fucker who happens to have direct mobile calls with this architect.
Who's is faulty or not or what happened it still shocks most when this architect joins the scrum call daily. Fuck him.1
Me: Yea, I'm having a good day. Sun's shining, Birds are singing. I'm really enjoying my lunch.
Errors on the build I started before lunch:
There's a huge difference between cloning (flappy birds) a successful product of software and making a better version of something (instacart). It requires having creativity, talent, and a desire to truly make something great.1
My best friend's ex is really cool. But while they were dating, I was a bit frustrated, mainly because he was interested in many things she wasn't.
One thing that annoyed me was that his major is computer science, and her major is medical research.
GIRL, IF ONLY YOU WERE ALSO MAJORING IN COMPUTERS. YOU CAN ASK THE GUY FOR HELP WITH YOUR ASSIGNMENTS. EXPLOIT HIIIIM. HAVE COFFEE DATES AT STARBUCKS AND CODE TOGETHEEER. HIT TWO BIRDS WITH ONE STONE10
I wasn’t paid for this, this was part of a school project I had to do about 2 years ago when I was in 9th grade.
We had to do something in biology and me and my friend both decided we should make an informational app that shows info about different kinds of birds. It was an Android app, it was before I moved to iOS development.
We knew absolutely nothing about advanced layout development and constraints and layouts or anything, and we barely knew how to navigate the Android UI framework.
We had like 5 days to work on this shit. We wanted it to look nice and somehow we came up with a layout that doesn’t look all fucked up between form factors and we barely had to code anything in Java, it was all just layouts and shit. But we knew absolutely NOTHING.
We totally failed. The project stunk so much I don’t have a backup of it anywhere and I am glad that is so.
Looking back at this shit ass project, I can see how much I learned in the process in terms of app development and my general knowledge and skills in computer science, 99% of it by teaching myself.1
Today on my science test they asked, "There is an animal in a cage, how would you find out if it is a bird or a mammal?"
a. compare it to the characteristics of birds and mammals
b. see if it has a beak
c. look at it's droppings
d. open the cage and see if it flies out
Out of all the questions, d is the most reliable.6
The first freelancer i hired on @upwork actually copied code from their other projects into mine. I could tell because every PR had a new coding style, naming conventions and massive amounts of unused css.
Knocking out 2 birds with one stone.10
Every team building event, the company run a random draw to organise the teams.
It looks like the random equations not applicable to the beauty lady and the rich guy, they always match together.
What a draw...
Should I give them actual simple running draw app! Or they may hate me :)
!rant. Doing some great new stuff at work to make our dev team's live easier. Finding out how to use Docker for our automated test setup, that's killing 2 birds with 1 stone.4
that feeling when your boss just gave you a dozen of things to change on a pull request that's already been open for a week, and as you try to understand what he even wants, you can enjoy a full view of your colleague's screen who seemingly just added ornitology to his list of passions and is broadening his education about birds on Wikipedia.2
!rant - Love the new pets but only shoulder birds show up in mini avatars on posts. Cats should be available on shoulders too. :) One of our team has a cat that walks on a harness, rides & sits on his shoulders around town and while he works.2
Non tech hobby of mine: bird watching (you may have guessed based on my username). Although it’s a non tech hobby, there are so many great apps to help identify birds and learn about them. EBird, birdnet, Merlin, picture bird etc. I also have a few books about bird watching.
Crazy how many different kinds of birds you can see when you really start paying attention.5
High school, prepping to go to class, I take a book that I needed for class, while picking it up from the book shelf the latin vocabulary fell and landed on my hard drive which was on top of my MacBook, two birds with one stone :(
I now have three different external hard drives and planning to get an off-site solution as well.
"why don't you just use twitter?"
"that's for birds, most of them didn't understand what i'm saying"1
Had my first exposure to documentation with Doxygen (and documentation in general) today. ITS SO COOL! I don't know how I functioned before. Keeping the entire project in your head is for the birds!
So I want to get a bird. A conure. And I really want to get one but I’m deathly afraid I’m not gonna be a good owner. I’ll sacrifice a fuck ton for it and I will commit to taking care of it and befriending it but I’m just really really afraid.9
It always blows my mind how a silly idea / hunch tries settling down in your head very close to your regular bedtime and before you realise you can hear the birds chirping and sunshine hitting your window pane.
It’s unhealthy and should not be encouraged whatsoever.
But I guess this is the sort of involvement and craziness that separates us from rest of the professional world.2
Jesus God. This feels kind of tacky!
(Yes, I use "thee" and "thou", as well as the "-st" suffix. They maximise the clarity of statements.)
People who resemble me are rare, but I intend to form with someone who is extraordinarily similar to me an alliance. Because I have failed to locate anyone who meets my criteria by simply performing on-line searches for people who bear a resemblance to me, I am publicising this document.
I have an unusually dry sense of humour, one which is dry to the extent of often being interpreted as being extremely malevolent. I am a polymath who studies ornithology, various fields of computer science, electrical engineering, mechanical engineering, general biology, neurology, physics, mathematics, and various other things. I am more than capable of withholding from others information, i.e., I am capable of keeping a secret. Being politically correct is hardly an act of which I am guilty, and, in order to provide an example of my politically-incorrect nature, I cite in this sentence my being a eugenicist. I am the servant of the birds. I greatly appreciate the breed of philosophy which concerns interactions and general wisdom, as opposed to questioning the purpose of existence and otherwise ultimately unimportant things. I have been described as being paranoid about security. I do not in the slightest like meaningless crap, e.g., art. I often venture in an attempt to shoot tiny birds, because I adore them and wish to develop a greater understanding of them. I am proficient with most computer systems when a manual is available to me. This was a small assortment of pieces of information concerning me which could be used as a method of judging whether or not thou art similar to me.
Thou art, however, required to possess some specific qualities, which include being able to maintain confidentiality, i.e., not being a whistle-blower or anything similar. In addition to this, consciously believing that logical reasoning is better than emotionally-based thinking, and thou needest to be capable of properly utilizing resources which are available on-line, e.g., Encyclopedia Britannica. I also demand that thou writest coherent English sentences.
If thou believest that thou bearest some resemblances to me, please send to me an e-mail which describes thee and is encrypted with the PGP public key which is available at the following URL: http://raw.github.com/varikvalefor/.... I can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org
I wonder if you can train cats to not eat birds but to still mouse
Betcha you can
You just have to socialize them to birds but still give them a taste for mouse by bringing them prey as well1
When I tuned angry birds with spotify and made the speed the beat of the song.
App didn't work out but who cares. Had so much f*cking fun building it.
Watching nature recycle itself into precise movements of insects and birds in the same places over the years because humans are doing EXACTLY the same things over those years, yet again, makes me feel like i'm in a damn simulator where some logic issue is causing everything to loop.
kind of like that.
except in the sense that tons of people moving about in scheduled lives is creating a continuous circle we're all getting caught in that is spreading out and animal life and even weather are in sync with it.
and it never used to be this way until a group of fucked up sadists decided to make it this way.6
As a developer of system critical software I tend to be obsessed about efficiency. Sometimes a short function is as efficient as it needs to be. Other times you need to build a large complicated structure to reach the efficiency needed for large or complex data. This caused me to pause and have respect for the efficiency of the creators of modern day windmills. I may have killed 2 birds with one stone, but am in awe of killing thousands of birds with one windmill.3