For some, Jan 01 1970 was just the first day of a new year. For others, it marked the beginning of time.

Push me
And then just merge me
So I can get that
Merge confliction
Merge confliction

Autocomplete in editors is like that annoying friend that keeps interrupt();ing every singletonInstance():le thing you try{}catch(Exception e)} to say, delay(1000);ing you COUNT(*)ntless of times.

"So, tell us a bit about yourself.."

0, and sometimes 1

Windows error messages on point as always..

You know the cringe you feel from looking at the code you wrote a year ago? Yep. Me too.

Meeting with the PM

Somewhere in that code there's a
"TODO learn regex"

Always put yourself out of your comfort zone. Always. It's the main source of both anxiety and personal growth. Don't think that you're a fraud because you can't understand the new stuff right away, how else would you learn? Looking back you should always be impressed on how much you've covered, but still have anxiety of what's to come.

Lmao saying "ok boomer" triggers the Google home

When you're typing "make sure noone else is ..."
but your fingers automatically types
"else if"

Damaged beyond repair

When someone texts you "<3" and you're like "that's just half a statement"

I love when job postings are like, you will use THIS tool, and THIS is how it will be accomplished!!!! NO EXCEPTIONS!!!

bitch, i'm the senior engineer, I should be the one picking and choosing tools to match your needs, not you and HR pals!

no wonder your job offer still isnt' filled!

i'd love to ask these organizations why they chose such boomer technologies in the first place and why there is no effort to change to much more developer / user friendly tools.... just a red flag from the start

I just released a tiny game for iPhone!

It's basically an attempt to mix 'Heroes of Might & Magic' and mtg.

In the screenshot my terminal says 'helloworld.cpp'. That's right, this is my first c++ program and I don't care how crappy you think this game is, I'm super proud of myself!

I've always worked in data science where managers assume I know how to code because there's text on my screen and I can query and wrangle data, but I actually didn't know what a class was until like 3 years into my job.

Making this game was my attempt to really evolve myself away from just statistics / data transforms into actual programming. It took me forever but I'm really happy I did it

It was brutal at first using C++ instead of R/Python that data science people usually use, but now I start to wonder why it isn't more popular. Everything is so insanely fast. You really get a better idea of what your computer is actually doing instead of just standing on engineers' shoulders. It's great.

After the game was 90% finished (LOL) I started using Swift and Spritekit to get the visuals on the screen and working on iPhone. That was less fun. I didn't understand how to use xCode at all or how to keep writing tests, so I stopped doing TDD because I was '90% done anyway' and 'surely I'll figure out how to do basic debugging'. I'll know better next time...

When I realized the .config files of GTA VC could be modified in a text editor. Policecar maxspeed=0, wheelsize=0, damagemultiplier=9999

Job listing: "We work with the VBA language which is an addition to the classic Visual Basic language..."

No. VBA is not an addition to VB. It's his retarded brother

Asked a boomer client to send their email Id. They sent it along with their password. Written on a piece if paper. Through their neighbor.

Imagine coding in Comic Sans

"we don't offer remote"

"oh so then there's work on the floor and with other members of the company?"

"no its mostly typing on a keyboard"

"so why the fuck is it not remote?"

"we are a boomer EU country, sorry"

so exhausted already and its only like the 3rd week of looking 😩😩😩

Why does the idea of having to develop social skills somehow seem to scare the fuck out of a large portion of you?

Is being a likeable human being such a weird concept? What do you expect? To people just validate your entire existence based on how good you can sit in front of a set of monitors and push code out? Thousands of monkeys can do that shit. Thousands of systems will eventually do such things.

for whatever reason the "I am a fucking asshole that can code" trope seems to be a "real thing" amongst developers. A mfker can know waaaaaaay less than you, have the same credentials (degrees etc) and will get the job because you were too busy building an online persona governing how better you are than everyone else. How "quirky" and Sheldon Cooper like you are. You think that makes you likeable? "i don't need to be likeable" <---- yes the fuck you are, because this shit is something in which people can be trained upon.

A team, regardless of how much you agree with this, can choose a person solely based on how well he/she/whatever clicks with them. You might be the end all be all of development, but if they don't like you or feel you will not be someone worthwile to be around, will not chose you. They will go with the charismatic newbie that can learn the same shit you so dear hold on to, because they are likeable.

Sticking to a merit based "I am the best there is" asshole mentality is a thing of the fucking past, boomer mentality. For which newer generations are parting ways with, with still profitable results. workable results. Production ready results.

Yet you chose to stick to a "I might be a quirky annoying fuck, but I am the best" mentality?

This is why you were bullied. This is why you can't get any dick, this is why you can't get any pussy, this is why you sit your ass in your little dark room trying to convince yourself that being lonely is a choice, not a situation in which you put your ass in. This is why I also dislike developers online.

Most of you might be the nicest mfkers on the planet when dealing with on a face to face basis, but if you put this shit on a screen for the world to see you will be viewed upon as some dickhead.

Fuck this "code is my life" mentality, shit is but a paycheck, a craft is not a glimpse into what you are as a person, but a way in which you make a paycheck. Molding your personality, based on what you do for a living, really?

Damn man, shit is just so fucking sad. So cringeworthy even.

Because of the pandemic and how most of the people in my institution's I.T department are working from home we were asked to route calls from our work extension to our home phones. I did it to my cellphone and some of the calls that I get are hilarious, yet annoying. Annoying because we have a bunch of boomer ass people making the most ridiculous calls.
Being that the calls are not registered into our phones they just show the random number from which x person is calling.

Just right now my phone rings aaaand:
Me: "Hello?"
Boomer: "YES <tech support technician's name which is obviously not mine> I NEED YOU TO FIX MY EMAIL IT IS NOT WORKING AND MY LAPTOP IS NOT WORKING"

Me: "I am sorry, I don't know how did you get this number, but what we can..."

BOOMER: WELL CAN I PLEASE SPEAK TO THE TECHNICIAN? I NEED THIS TO GET FIXED RIGHT NOW

Me: As I was saying, we can attempt to send an email through your phone's outlook app if you have it installed or I can send an email asking them to contact you since you are reaching an entirely different dep..."

Boomer: "DID YOU NOT HEAR ME! MY LAPTOP IS NOT WORKING AND I CAN'T SEND EMAILS AND I DON'T WANT TO USE MY PHONE, I WANT TO USE MY LAPTOP"

Me: Did YOU not hear me? I just said that I can send an email for you since my computer is working properly, at the same time, not wanting to use your phone to send an email when you have no other option available is more of a YOU problem, it is not mine

Boomer: EXCUSE ME! WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE TALKING TO? i AM THE MANAGER OF <X> DEPARTMENT

Me: nice to meet you I guess, I am the MANAGER of X department as well, i have been told that for issues with my attitude I can just toss you over to <Director of IT> if you wish.

Boomer: Oh....no...thank you, I will send an email through my phone and see if that works.

Some background: The Head of my department is a hardass that is not scared to tell people to fuck off when they are messing shit up and he is very protective of all of us. I love this man and have personally followed the dude through hell when no one else came through. If they think I am bitchy that dude would throw down an entire house over people being dense, and even though he is a boomer himself (age terms) he despises the general attitude of entitled people from his generation.

10/10 I love my boss and hope to heaven that all of you find similar leaders.

"LeT's uSe gRaPhQL!" They said.

"It EliMinAtEs cOmpLeX aNd vErBoSe REST coDe!" they said.

Me sitting here for hours waiting for the backend team to fix major regressions every time they push the smallest "updates" to staging... 🤡

Call me a boomer but I can't help but feeling graphQL makes things MORE complex than REST... either that or the backend devs have no idea what they are doing

I should really learn C

You know it's time to solve a bug when you pause the music, take a final sip of coffe, sit up straight in your chair and take off all accessories

I've taken over a project with legacy code, this is one of the methods:

private bool areEqual(string value1, string value2)
{
return value1 == value2;
}

Also, the opening brackets are on a new line

General advice - People aren't against you, they are just for themselves

Theory: zoomers are actually just boomers who come generationally full circle

Source: I work with clowns in their early 20s and the fact that they are young and were essentially born into tech and had it their whole lives literally has not contributed anything towards their understanding of basic tech concepts - if anything, it has made them more clueless.

The good news: now I know whatever is invented in the future, whatever tech comes to be, the next generation of clowns will always have many jobs to offer me.

Story when I worked as a 1st line technician:

Customer: "Yes hello, I'm trying to install Windows as instructed, but the installer is not starting"

Me: "Ok, have you tried pressing [button] at the bootscreen?"

C: "Yes, over and over, still nothing happens"

This was actually one of my first calls, so my co-worker stepped in to help while I listened.

Co-worker: "okay, so when you rebooted the computer, press [button] and tell me what happens"

C: "....okay, I think it's starting"

Co-w: "Great! I'll just wait until it's running"

A minute goes by, installer seems to be running, but then we hear a loud BEEP. It's so loud another coworker hears it from his desk, through our headsets. A moment goes by, and it BEEPS again. Then the sound begins again, but doesn't stop. It's like an air horn at full blow. We ask the customer what he's doing, but he cannot hear us over the constant beep. We're brainstorming what it could be, when he finally says something:

"CAN.. LET.. OF.."

Co-w: "WHAT???"

"CAN I LET GO OF THE BUTTON??"

-----
I think we laughed the whole day

So I was talking to a Boomer about my job and why it's not "so easy, all you need is a laptop". And we were talking about specifically how the company makes a ton of money from my work, I've seen the contract, I get like less than 5% of what I make for the company.

After explaining a couple of things like this. They go back to then "why don't just buy a laptop then?"

Like, mother fucker! Did you just ignore my entire explanation just because don't understand it?

So, I'm living in a completely computer illiterate family and I was called to help my father with something on a Laptop where he wanted to stream his favorite Soccer-Club.

So I walk up to him, ask what's wrong, and he says (roughly translated from German) "That thing doesn't work!"

And I'm just like ((Wat u mean))
So I ask him to explain the problem in detail.
Apparently his streaming service wasn't loading his stream.

Well damn I say, try searching for the problem on Google and find a solution.
((But no no no imma just call my son for everything that's freaking wrong with tech, he sure knows what to do))

As I'm not that experienced with Webservices as of yet, I had no idea what to do.

He was fucking furious!

"You always act like you know everything about tech and programs and stuff and can't even help me with fixing this Stream-Thing?!"

I responded simply by saying "It's not my area of work!"

Seems like he didn't know the difference between TECH-JESUS and hobbyist software engineer.

So I stand there and he just goes on one of these typical boomer tech illiterate rants, of which I'm sure you can imagine enough being on this platform.

tl;Dr; It pisses me of big time how people are not even trying to understand technology, nor attempting to help themselves by eG. Googling some simple problem, but rather just ask around and then being pissed off if the asked person just doesn't know the answer or can't help!

My company just acquired another company from some losers.
Gotta load their pittance database onto our thing.
Their entire "Technology Department" is one old fart.
One even older fart runs their accounting.
I asked the IT boomer for their accounting data.
He tells me to get the head accountant.
The head accountant says they do not have any historical accounting data.
I threaten to call the (equivalent of the) IRS on them.
They give up, admit that they do have some historical data. But they attempt to pull a "malicious compliance" on me, send me a pallet full of old receipts, on paper.

I do what I have done one hundred times before, I go to the closest community college (equivalent) and ask/bribe a teacher to offer the most trustworthy kids some pretty pennies to scan all those files for me.
A dozen of them barely took a week to do it using their not-so-bad camera phones.
It all for about the same price as a couple of older-but-still-good iPhones.
Then it's on to some simple OCR and data normalization tasks.

This morning I had another meeting with the losers, the first since I told them their "data" had just arrived in the mail (but a couple weeks after that). They log in for the meeting all smug, thinking we would ask for more time to load their data, and it would be my team's fault for any delays.
Then the regional business evaluator logs in and said he reviewed their financials yesterday and we have a lot to talk about.
I will remember their "just got punched in the gut" faces forever :)

First try at threads in java, search algorithm improved by 35% (56sec to 36sec). Pretty cool to learn 😊

Day 7 post turning 30:

I can feel the boomer mentality kicking in at full strength.
I find myself talking to people about how 90's music was so great and kids these days won't get to appreciate it.
I see so many people with jobs who are significantly younger than me.
I sleep a couple hours more than I used to.
I live a routine life which is how I don't feel time passing by me.
I hear a voice inside my head telling me to quit gym because i am gonna grow weak anyway. Also, it would help with my productivity.

C# is the prime example that rude parents can have great babies

Ternary operator in Java, because damn it looks so slick

I have a VP constantly harassing my people about some reports that we need to do as per federal law.

The thing is, these live inside of such system that I get to see exactly how many "hits" they get on a yearly basis. The only traffic we have on those sections is of people going ahead and putting the information from our reports there.

That's it, literally. Our user base does not go there. Federal agencies do not go there. No one gives two blips of shit about those sections. Yet she continuously acts like they are the most important thing in the fucking world. To make it better, I was told not to generate actual analytical data from said reports, since people with PHDs will come down on me to ask me who the fuck do I think I am from gauging them with such systems. So shit is a mute point on all fucking accounts.

I told my VP I can generate traffic information to let them know that shit is not really the most important thing in the fucking universe. His eyes glowed.

I don't want to see head rolls, but from staying till the next morning awake trying to give the best to our userbase, and just to be called out on shit like this as if I did not do enough for our people just.....well....it fucking hits man.

The worse part was me literally getting 30 minutes of sitting down after an all nighter, doing something for my users, to get to a meeting the next morning (I should not have driven there honestly) to hear this bitch complain about us not doing enough or not caring or whatever other bullshit she would spew.

I was livid, lack of sleep makes me dangerous. I turned to say something when my boss stopped me and took care of business. I seriously love this man. By all accounts and generational gaps a boomer, but one of the few good golden ones.

I just hate how unappreciated the realm of software development is by people that think that our shit is as simple as making a fucking powerpoint presentation.

Consolidate that with a director from another department taking all fucking glory during a major event of an application that I built by myself with 2 fucking weeks of no sleeping. And shit just gets glorious.

I have considered moving to other places, and heck, have gotten amazing offers, what with having a degree with a big fucking GPA and having the credentials of a senior, lead, full stack and manager role, the sky is the limit. But i know that if I leave then my users suffer, and I just can't fucking have that.

I have heard them speaking about doing something with X app that I built (with my department) I have even heard one of them saying "how is this made?" and a part of me hoped that it would be a good time to grab them and tell them of the field and the things that they can do. But I don't like announcing myself that way, always seemed to presumptuous, so I just smile, fuck yeah, my users are doing their thing with what I built to better their lives, what more can I have?

I have gotten criticisms from them, one recognized me, told me about his pain points and how it makes it hard for him to do what he must. Getting the data from the user base in an effort to make shit better for them drives me, my challenge being "how about this? better eh?"

But fucking execs man, think only of themselves, not the users, they forget about the users. Much like a shitty rock band forgetting about the music, about the fans.

I can't let that slide. But this fucking field. I sometimes fucking hate it, and I hate it because of the normies that don't understand and do not want to understand.

I do way too much, my guys do way too much and all I want is for the recognition to go to them. They do not need the ego boost, but to see my guys sitting in a meeting in which some dumb fuck is trying to drill us for taking to long, not doing something and what not, it fucking pisses me off. As their boss I always stand up and tell bitches off, but instead of learning, the bitches just keep pressing on their already defeated points.

Everything in human life gets fucking erradicated by: humans. People really do fucking suck.

I sometimes wish to go back, redo my diesel tech license and just work there, where I think one would be better of talking to an engine. But no, even then you get people, you have to interact with people, deal with people, and I am so far up my game and in my field that starting from scratch is a fucking mute point.

Maybe I need to keep fucking with stocks, get rich and just keep investing on bullshit. Whatever the fuck it takes me from having to feel the urge to choke a motherfucker in public.

what the fuck is wrong with boomer professors ?? I enrolled in a front-end development elective at my uni in hopes to just brush up on some little things I may have missed on my self taught education.

this class has been an absolute tragedy. he spends about 1 hr each class trying to figure out how to configure docker... FOR A PROJECT THAT IS JUST BARE HTML CSS JS. WHY??? he is so adamant that we use DOCKER for this class. I don't understand why.

most of the students are BRAND NEW to front end development and know Jack shit. and here this professor is insisting on nuancing the class with docker. it makes absolutely no sense.

This was the best hack when I was 11. My computer had a too small fan that was always on max speed, and thus really loud. To overcome this issue I wrapped a thick blanket around the entire computer case. A week later it broke down due to the obvious heating problem, and when it came back from service the repair technician just looked at me saying "Someone has had this computer fucked up intentionally, everything is melted from within. What have you done to it?!" Me being the piece of shit that I was just denied and got a brand new PC for free, nobody ever knew..

I'm fucking tired of having to explain to boomers why scrolling on the web isn't a problem anymore and why you shouldn't just shove every pixel of content above the fold. And people seem to really hate whitespace on web pages.

I am NOT going to fill up every fucking pixel on your screen with stuff just because you are too lazy to put your finger on your mouse wheel. Don't know why people just get a fucking WordPress site because they clearly don't listen to expertise from a professional with 10 years' web dev experience. I learned this shit so you don't have to, boomer!

fuck it, I'm gonna send them NNGroup research on this.

Looking around where I work, I'm reminded of when I was young and ambitious, like all the other kids around me at the time, with a dislike for all the older dudes and dudettes in upper management. With the exception of three other guys around my age, everyone, including the CEO, was in high school, middle school, elementary school, or not even born yet when I started my career. Just like them, I was plucky and chatty and (trying to be) funny and social. I didn't know how fast I would go from that set to the old fat guy that they look askance at and wonder how I'm still around with my weird ways and "boomerish", socially retarded behavior. What's really galling is that I'm solidly Gen X, like some of them, but I guess I talk more like a Boomer because my parents were older when I was born and I was kinda raised in that mindset. I'm the office schlub now. A man out of my time. And I've never been in any kind of upper management, even. I am Kevin Malone.

!dev

Mike Bloomberg using memes to try and advertise on Instagram is the biggest "ok boomer" moment I have ever witnessed.

Woke up early, took my mom out for breakfast. It has been more than an hour, we have talked for about 15 minutes the rest of the time she has been on her phone. Was giving smartphones to boomers a mistake? Any boomer devs here that have fallen to the same addiction?

These old people and their damn mobile devices! Get off my lawn!

I see a lot of rants about Project Managers (PMs). As someone who might work as that in the future, what are the some do's and don'ts for that role?

[not really a rant] I've lost 1 hour to explain to a .NET boomer developer that I like C# but I hate .NET. I had to explain even why they are different things.

I hate this kind of people

Fuck stupid managers.

My current agency tried to create a bundle of generic Microservices with the hope of save time and money on future projects. That was two years ago (i was working here from 4 months ago).

What they have now? well, a sort of distributed monolyth were if one service goes down, everything else fails, infinite technical debt, no security policies (yeah, all the apis are open!!!) Business rules on the frontend . . .

And what the stupid manager say? "Everything must be ok because i designed it very well, i research a lot for this"

Stupid boomer.

PD: Yeah, despite the fact he is judt a manager, he take the responsibility to design the full architecture, idk why no one srops him.

So we've got a gif that doesn't show up in our React Native application. Of course, the designers assume it's me: "are you sure the gif is in the codebase? how are you using it in your component"? yeah ok boomer. I'm like, look at this other gif, works fine. "oh" So I tell them, double check the export options on how you are building the gif, maybe there is something there. so now they are asking ME for those export options. I'M A DEV, NOT A DESIGNER, DO YOUR JOB AND FIGURE IT OUT. I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT PROGRAM YOU ARE USING

oh as an aside, I was putting up a website for a client and they are like "my logo is quite similar to many others, is this something to worry about legally?" OH, SO NOW I'M A LAWYER TOO??!!?!? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE GOOGLE IS LITERALLY IN FRONT OF YOU

why do people continually think just because we can code we are fucking designers / lawyers / astronauts
/ god?
man this pisses me off - i think of that draw red lines with blue ink expert video, in the end, just smile and nod: "i can do... absolutely anything... trust me, I'm an expert"

When you're debugging a seemingly stupid bug, which CANNOT be your fault, and you will NEVER learn anything from it.... until you actually solve it, realise that it was so obvious all along, and learn a ton in the process.

Sending webrequest to book car service, but the website isn't telling me if the request went through - just back to the same page with all info filled in. No error messages. Right now they either have 10 requests from me, or none. Stupid fucking site.

The guys who made Android Studio have absolutely no idea what normal life is like. I'm just a regular person from Germany (a country known for low Internet speeds) and decided to spend my time with creating a primitive Android app.

Why the hecking heck does it need to download anything when creating a blank project? Okay, maybe I'm just a boomer who is stuck in the Visual C# 2005 era and this entire dependency stuff has become a bit more complicated over the years...

BUT WHY DOES THIS ATROCITY OF AN SDK NOT HAVE ANY KIND OF PROGRESS INDICATION WHEN DOWNLOADING STUFF?

Listen, I'm just a regular person with a regular internet connection. Developing an SDK is not my job, but using one might be. And if so, I'd really like to know how much time downloading gradlelib_bin_exe42069.zip is likely to take when it's so important for creating an app.

Just got off a call doing some classic "I know you are not tech support but please help me connect my iPhone to my computer", and I heard the following words:

"What's the Windows start button?"

This was not a boomer. This was not a Gen Y, Gen X, or even Millenial!

I shit you not, a zoomer did not know what or where the windows start button was.

Just got home from training, girlfriend is out for the evening, no other dues; perfect time to play some games.

...aaaaaand they're doing maintenance on the cables for another hour 😶

It's so early but i'm brimming with excitement and need to share...

I might be going NUCLEAR guys!

In the very literal sense, don't overthink it (and no i don't mean blowing stuff up, and no i don't mean boomer fiSsiOn, I mean the real stuff - fusion!)

Had a SIM card for a week. Wasn't able to log into their service portal. Internet service was shitty as well. I recalled the contract.

Now they have sent me an email informing me of a bill which is stored in the online portal, and i have no idea for what this is, or how to find out.

I miss letters :-(

What is it that service providers wont send this stuff out as PDF?

*boomer-rage

Boomer humor: I hate my wife
Gen-X humor: I hate my life
Gen-Z humor:
🥚
🦵 L E G G

Dev: Sends weekly update email on Friday, as drudgingly required by management, outlining that stress level is high recently in the past two weeks and constant polling for feedback and updates is stressing him out, needs to slow down the pace

Management: (ON A FUCKING SATURDAY): "Received your email @fullStackChris"

WOW! THANKS FOR THAT INSIGHTFUL UPDATE! I BET YOU DID! I HAVE NO DOUBT GOOGLE'S SMTP SERVERS ARE RUNNING PROPERLY. AND AFTER READING IT, YOU HAVE THE AUDACITY TO @ ME IN A WHATSAPP MESSAGE. ON A FUCKING SATURDAY. I DON'T WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU, I DON'T WANT TO THINK ABOUT THE COMPANY OR ITS TASKS UNTIL MONDAY. PLEASE STOP.

I mean they must be fucking with me at this point, right guys? Maybe I should start writing stuff like "I need more tasks and more messages throughout the day" then I would probably receive less, I mean wtf is actually going on.

Old old organization makes me feel like I'm stuck in my career. I'm hanging out with boomer programmers when I'm not even 30.

I wouldn't call myself an exceptional programmer. But the way the organization does it's software development makes me cringe sometimes.

1. They use a ready made solution for the main system, which was coded in PL/SQL. The system isn't mobile friendly, looks like crap and cannot be updated via vendor (that you need to pay for anyway) because of so many code customizations being done to it over the years. The only way to update it is to code it yourself, making the paid solutions useless
2. Adding CloudFlare in the middle of everything without knowing how to use it. Resulting in some countries/networks not being able to access systems that are otherwise fine
3. When devs are asked to separate frontend and backend for in house systems, they have no clue about what are those and why should we do it (most are used to PHP spaghetti where everything is in php&html)
4. Too dependent on RDBMS that slows down development time due to having to design ERD and relationships that are often changed when users ask for process revisions anyway
5. Users directly contact programmers, including their personal whatsapp to ask for help/report errors that aren't even errors. They didn't read user guides
6. I have to become programmer-sysadm-helpdesk-product owner kind of thing. And blamed directly when theres one thing wrong (excuse me for getting one thing wrong, I have to do 4 kind of works at one time)
7. Overtime is sort of expected. It is in the culture

If you asked me if these were normal 4 years ago I would say no. But I'm so used to it to the point where this becomes kinda normal. Jack of all trades, master of none, just a young programmer acting like I was born in the era of PASCAL and COBOL

If only kids exam results were as impressive as their Snapchat streaks...

On an all hands with a higher up that recently joined the company advocating "in person" discussion and I'm just like "yes you're a boomer we get it nobody gives a shit"

Old bitch just cut me off on my bike and almost killed me, we need another boomer remover. They properly fucked this planet already and honestly might start killin them myself.

These days i like to think of our data privacy as that of an amazon package delivery between person A to B

- Person A wants a packet of condoms and guns, but don't want society to know about it
- person B wants to send guns and condoms to B
- Amazon is willing to provide transportation with a pinky promise that it won't tell anyone about the delivery.
- Thus B gives the condoms and guns to Amazon wrapped up in hard box hoping that Amazon or anybody else won't open it. Similarly A receives the packet hoping that nobody else got to know about it.

But the problem is a LOT of people could possibly know of the contents, even if A or B aren't willing to share details
- Amazon can look into it.
- government can stop the amazon car transporting the packet and force them to look into it.
- some 3rd person(aka hacker) could fool the delivery truck and get access to packet contents.

=======================================
and this morning, my neighbour, A very radical hindu supporter, frustrated by the recent tablighi jamaat fuck-up , gave a very strange statement "you know in future, the government would pass a law which will allow them to hear these ppl's calls /whatsapp messages. This will allow government to detect and take actions on every of these anti-national scums"

I wanted to say WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU HOPING FOR, BOOMER? THAT'S CENSORSHIP!! but i couldn't say because his illiterate vision is no longer a hope, i can see it becoming reality.

Personally i am equally angry with that whole incident and how that community handled it. But how can anyone ask for censorship, just because a few elements misused it? The problem lies with thise elements and people who support their thoughts not the whole community or the communication medium.

From what i have heard in the recent US and indian law news, they are essentially trying to peek into the data we send to each other legally.

So going by the package delivery analogy, its like government now wants to have every amazon delivery happen in transparent boxes in a transparent truck, just because a few people ordered illegal items via amazon delivery.

This world is going crazy and stupid.

came to the pub for some peice and quiet to read my book and this fucking dumbass boomer is sneezing every fucking goddamn second dude fucking fuck off god just eject me into space what the fuck is wrong with these FUCKING retards jesus christ

TL;DR - I came up with an ingenious version of a solution to a problem and still got 0 marks.

In my bachelor's degree we learned about abstraction, as usual for CS degree students.

In a later exam, a coding question asked us to swap two variables values without using a third variable and print the before and after on the screen.

You can read the question above again, because wait for it....

So this is what I wrote basically (JS equivalent solution),

class Solution {
constructor(obj) {
this.var1 = obj.var1;
this.var2 = obj.var2;
}

swap() {
return {"var1": this.var2, "var2": this.var1};
}
}

let input = {"var1":5, "var2": 7}
let object = new Solution(input);
console.log('Before');
console.log(input);
let solution = object.swap();
console.log('After');
console.log(solution);

Now look, before your boomer asses jump in and say "aCkChUaLlY tHiS iS iNcORrEcT"
I did include all kinds of comments that this is abstracted. The swap function is hidden away and the object variable doesn't need to know what it's doing.

In the context of this question, this is absolutely acceptable as a solution since the end-goal is to print the results on the screen and the user wouldn't see the source code.

I still got 0 on that question and I still get pissed about it sometimes, when I remember it, like just now.

we're seriously still using EPS files in 2024?

i don't have tooling for this BECAUSE I'M NOT A FUCKING BOOMER!

So I bought a gtx1650 gpu for my old phenom II X4 pc. It didn’t work – the screen vent black in like five minutes after powering up the pc.

I was disappointed, but instead of returning the gpu, I bought all the other components to build a new pc on ryzen cpu. Including the gpu, it all was like $400 and I still have all my old parts to sale.

Now I’m here, playing all the latest games like doom and wolfenstein on ultra in 1080p 60fps and I’m more than happy.

I basically found a way to convert my bad experience into good experience. I’m just off my therapy, so all that bad experiences that may seem insignificant are a big deal for me.

I didn’t knew it was possible to make a good emotions out of bad emotions that easy. If only I knew the way to apply this strategy for any arbitrary situation.

(please miss me with that boomer bullshit like “nothing is wrong stop whining and get over it” etc. I’ve been there, I’ve done that and I needed medical treatment afterwards. “Getting over it” just doesn’t work)

Here's a brainteaser:

What would lowercase numbers look like?

"Just let me know when you're done (today) with that handful of JIRA tickets that are not reproducible, have no description, and include no error information. We need to get them into the next release."

Yeah. Yeah, I'll let you know real soon.

client: "can you build out a staging server for us? here's all the code, everything you need"
me: "awesome, looking good, i have almost everything i need, just give me the credentials for the server, and I'll get started installing all the infrastructure"
client: "ok, try these!"
me: "doesn't work"
client: "this one?"
me: "doesn't work..."
client: "how about this one?"
me: "STILL NOT WORKING!!!"

imagine you want someone to do stuff on your server and you don't even know the root SSH password.... smh

why is this always a problem, use fucking 1password or something its 40 bucks a year, secure, and you can organize alllll your passwords. don't be a fucking boomer and write them on a piece of paper, or worse, apparently like my client, never know it or have it in the first place.

Any of us had annoyances with people with “a million dollar app idea” but what about these which gives unsolicited career advice?

I’m dealing with a boomer which keeps trying me to change my career and work into cyber security (because TV told him it’s a well paid field) despite me kindly telling him for multiple times which it’s not going to happen because I won’t throw away a career I love to work in a field which seems deadly boring to me (I love anything about coding from design to typing for hours on Vim meanwhile the only thought of reading for hours obscure documentation to find potential vulnerabilities on a system kills my spirit).

I am currently in the works of designing, building and extending an CRM/MRP system for production lines.

But for some reason I cant seem to find ANY modern sources, papers, books, forums, threads for context on this topic. It’s as if this topic doesn’t exist.

(One thing to point out is that there are sources for business wise analytics but am looking design wise)

I am starting to think that i am not googling it correctly (what a boomer).

Do you have any magic sources, captains of devrant?

TFW you complete a TopCoder problem in 20 lines of code, only to find another solution done with 4 lines and you have to spend 15 minutes just to understand it..

Freelancers/self-employed IT-consultants, how much do you charge per hour? Also, do you have any certificates or other things that boost your pay?

yeah guess what

i don't live in switzerland

so obviously i can't work from there with your super fancy "4 days of work week from home (as long as it's in switzerland!!! WoW aMaZiNG" boomer plan

but you know what? let me do literally 5 seconds of research so you don't have to

please end it all

TL;DR: I'm losing touch with reality and relatability and I am seeing it happen to me.

Context: As a dev, as we all do, I started with a low salary and was poor for the first 4 years of my career. I used to take pride in my poverty and because of it I faced difficulties in life.

Somehow because of that (and drugs), it gave me a fun personality and I was able to crack jokes about it and laugh it off. I was fun at parties.

But now, with moderate struggle, things are much better for me. I'm a YouTuber, I have clients and a full time job and I end up making the salary from just one client what I used to make in 2018 from a full-time office job.

Now, when anyone jokes about being poor and struggling, although I can still laugh with them, I pity them. I feel they are not working hard enough (even though I'm aware that I don't know their story, so it's a bad judgement and unfair).

I can no longer relate to my past self.

For me, I get sad about myself that I still don't have enough, while knowing I have more than what I could ask for.

I know this is not a good thing to happen to me, but it feels like I'm helpless. Sigh, I'm becoming a boomer aren't I?

Jason Bourne logic: type "run predictive algorithm" without any parameters into a terminal and it returns the locations of whatever you want. Either that function is the _best_ at predicting user input, or its variables are so hardcoded that we've just discovered the hardest material on earth

Oh, dang. I've been described as being a boomer.

Be me. shitty front end dev intern. React god.

boomer tech company using ASP.NET MVC frameworks. Hey energy-vampire, can you make us some sick react components???

sure.

get sent giant mvc repo. I've never used it. no documentation. no comments. nothing. just a fat app.

why do companies do this? I literally had no idea what to do with this thing. went to main guy and he had to build a .sln project, link it to some other project, setup an appsettings.json file, import secrets, and then build.

how the fuck would I know to do that???

Algorithm Design Course Assignment: Sort a hexadecimal string using 4 different sorting algorithms, and display each pass on a webpage. Easy enough yeah? Oh wait. Boomer professor wants us to use a canvas based javascript library called P5.js

Why the fuck. would you enforce some random ass boomer ass javascript library on the class, rather than let students choose something they're more comfortable with so they can focus on the core of the project. IMPLEMENTING ALGORITHMS. OR AT LEAST PROVIDE BOILERPLATE CODE?? GAH!!!!!!!!

…Reminder ot format Your strings….in boomer Case!!!

What do you think, is this bad practise?

boolean isNumber = true;
try {
Integer.parseInt(somestring);
} catch (NumberFormattingException e) {
isNumber = false;
}

Or is it better to create a method to check, even though I only use it at one place in 700 lines of code?