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(\____/)
( ͡ ͡° ͜ ʖ ͡ ͡°)
\╭☞ \╭☞
week 119
@dfox way to convince people for clean their desk
I hope everyone's wife / mom is feeling proud.
ʘ‿ʘ8 -
I came early today to the office
Found the office locked
Need fingerprint of Project Manager/CTO
With my mouth saying ah.. i blew hot air into the finger print sensor, 5 to 6 times
There u go.office door opened with welcome message
just hacked the system
Genius me11 -
I was at my uncle's village.
Where getting internet is big thing,very far from main city.
I was talking with one shopkeeper.
I told him ,I am software developer.
He ask me questions that
"How can I improve my business using software?"
To help me figure out situation.
He told me problems he is facing right now.
Accounting/inventory management/contact's with big retailers.
He was so genuinely explaining it.
He don't want next billion dollar startup.
He want to solved his problem.
I am really impressed after that conversation because person who don't know what is excel is talking about ERP software.
I am going to develop that software.
#respect14 -
Client: we need extraordinary website in ordinary price.
Me: ohk *google search* WordPress free theme.12 -
Real Chat with new female friend.
Me : what are you studying now?
she : First year of MBBS
Me : that's nice. Generally boys/girls take admission in engg and commerce.
she : yuk. I hate engineer's and engineering specially that PC worm's(soft engg).
Me : k
She : what are you studying?
Me : soft engg
she : I didn't mean it.
Me : it's ok
-_-
WTF man32 -
#3 Worst thing I've seen a co-worker do?
A 20-something dev, 'A', back in the early days of twitter+facebook would post all his extracurricular activities (drinking, partying, normal young-buck stuff). The dev mgr, 'J', at the time took offense because he felt 'A' was making the company look bad, so 'A' had a target on his back. Nothing 'A' did was good enough and, for example, 'J' had the source control czars review 'A's code to 'review' (aka = find anything wrong). Not sorting the 'using' statements, and extra line after the closing }, petty things like that. For those curious, orders followed+carried out by+led by 'T' in my previous rant.
As time went on and 'T' finding more and more 'wrong' with A's code, 'J' put A on disciplinary probation. 'A' had 90 days to turn himself around, or else.
A bright spot was 'A' was working on a Delphi -> C# conversion, so a lot of the code would be green-field development and by simply following the "standards", 'A' would be fine...so he thought.
About 2 weeks into the probation, 'A' was called into the J's office and berated because the conversion project was behind schedule, and if he didn't get the project back on track, 'A' wouldn't make it 30 days. I sat behind 'A' and he unloaded on me.
<'A' slams his phone on his desk>
Me: "Whoa...whats up?"
A: "Dude, I fucking hate this place, did you hear what they did?"
<I said no, then I think we spent an hour talking about it>
Me: "That all sucks. Don't worry about the code. Nobody cares what T thinks. Its not even your fault the project is behind, the DBAs are tasked with upgrades and it's not like anyone is waiting on you. It'll get done when it's done. Sounds like a witch hunt, what did you do? Be honest."
A: "Well, um...I kinda called out J, T, and those other assholes on facebook. I was drunk, pissed, and ...well...here we are."
Me: "Geez, what a bunch of whiney snowflakes. Keep your head down and you'll get thru it, or don't. Its not like you couldn't find another job tomorrow."
A: "This is my first job out of college and I don't want to disappoint my dad by quitting. I don't even know what I'm supposed to be doing. All J told me was to get better. What the fuk does that even mean?"
Me: "He didn't give you any goals? Crap, for someone who is a stickler for the rules, that's low, even for J."
Fast forward 2 weeks, I was attending MS TechEd and I was with another dev mgr, R.
R: "Did you hear? We had to let 'A' go today."
Me: "What the hell? Why?"
R: "He couldn't cut it, so we had to let him go."
Me: "Cut what? What did he do, specifically?"
R: "I don't know, 'A' was on probation, I guess he didn't meet the goals."
Me: "You guess? We fire a developer working on a major upgrade and you guess? What were these so-called goals?"
R: "Whoa...you're getting a little fire up. I don't know, maybe not adhering to coding standards, not meeting deadlines?"
Me: "OMG...we fire people for not forming code? Are you serious!?"
R: "Oh...yea...that does sound odd when you put it that way. I wish I'd talk to you before we left on this trip"
Me: "What?! You knew they were firing him *before* we left? How long did you know this was happening?"
R: "Honestly, for a while. 'A' really wasn't a team player."
Me: "That's dirty, the whole thing is dirty. We've done some shitty things to people, but this is low, even for J. The probation process is meant to improve, not be used as a witch hunt. I don't like that you stood around and let it happen. You know better."
R: "Yea, you're right, but doesn't change anything. J wanted to do it while most of us were at the conference in case 'A' caused a scene."
Me: "THAT MAKES IT WORSE! 'A' was blindsided and you knew it. He had no one there that could defend him or anything."
R: "Crap, crap, crap...oh crap...jeez...J had this planned all along...crap....there is nothing I can do no...its too late."
Me: "Yes there is. If 'A' comes to you for a letter of recommendation, you write one. If someone calls for reference, you give him a good one."
R: "Yea..yea...crap...I feel like shit...I need to go back to the room and lie down."
As the sun sets, it rises again. Within a couple of weeks, 'A' had another job at a local university. Within a year, he was the department manager, and now he is a vice president (last time I checked) of a college in Kansas City, MO.10 -
what a irony !
manager using MBP 2017 for browsing and presentation.
graphic designer is working on window xp sp2 dual core.
coreldraw
-_-5 -
one of my cousin ask me to help him for uploading his ex's private pics and videos on porn websites.
Because her parents are not allowing their marriage and she is not ready to go against family (he is not working anywhere, Jobless)
I simply take screenshots of our chat and send to his ex and her parents.
Hope they will punish him.16 -
once you start using linux on laptop. here is a condition of your mouse.
i don't know when I touched it last time.
16 -
A ecom website which sales premium gold product from 50k to 170k INR.
database : mysql
all passwords and user ID's are saved in plain text.23 -
If you are not wasting your 10hours to automate your half hour work then you are not a real programmer.6
-
*on call*
hr: hello , are you looking for a job change.
me : yes
hr: ok congo we have one opening for full stack developer
me : ok whats a jd?
hr : do you know reactjs?
me : yes
hr : do you know nodejs?
me : yes
hr : do you know bootstrap, jquery, photoshop, blender?
me : wait is it job for developer or graphic designer
hr : some time we give little task to our developer about editing photo and video
me : hmm intresting, I never tried blender but I can try if necessary. photoshop and other are ok for me
hr: that's great, we are looking for few more skills
me : ok
hr: . net and django
I started laughing😂😂😂😂
hr: what happened?
me: thank you for entertained me today, day was really rough.8 -
sad but reality
tiktokers create cring content and earn lots of money.
open source contributors create technology which is maintaining world but earn far less.
how can we expect bright future?30 -
Nothing technical
Just wanna share with my devrant family.
Now I have own restaurant.
Ya ya I know it's nothing techie but I m happy that I own some business and I will test my entrepreneur skills here.
Fucking happy.23 -
Person: What's more common than
c² = a² + b² ?
Me: Clients saying,
"I know how to do it myself but I just don't have time"
Source : twitter.com2 -
HOD: Hey, Can you conduct web development workshop for Jr.'s?
Me: no issue, Can you share syllabus?
HOD: download from the internet.
Me: cool, So may also be trained them related to GitHub.
HOD: what is GitHub?
Me: -_- nothing its little thing, I will manage.5 -
my company just paid adobe to use pirated copy of adobe software ,arrested one emp.
Multinational company -_-
listed company -_-
premium product -_-
why the hell they can't pay money to deserve one?
writing this rant on pirated windows.7 -
*downloads Torrent that's about to die*
Oh wicked, both of my peers have the whole thing and I can just come in and let my server seed it as well!
*watches asdfmovie as it downloads*
*returns*
Peer 1: have some data man
Peer 2: fuk off, I wan ma deta for meself
Pussy.
(Quite ironically, as I'm posting this rant, Peer 2 magically sent out data again as well.. coincidence? I think not!)4 -
Weekend plan:
1. I will watch react conf
2. I want to complete vim cheat sheet
3. LFS project is too
4. Netflix
5. ........
...
.
.
Electricity : 😈
Fuck..
😡2 -
Best client ever:
Yesterday I meet my new client. He need portfolio website for his logistics business.
So I meet him and explain my previous experience in website development.
After 1hour he gave me advance 50% of total cost.1 -
!rant ! technical
Just want to share with my devrant family.
Finally in relationship.
Funny thing is
Me-she
24-29
Hindu-jain
Non veg - veg
Don't have dressing sense- awesome dressing sense
Programmer-jewelry designer
Not so hygienic - so much hygienic
No gym ,no exercise - yoga master
Geeky - hate pc worms
2 times in jailed - follow every rule
Back bancher - front bancher
Love shayari/old bollywood song - EDM / western songs
Common bridge between us
MARVAL FANS
😂19 -
few years back,I wanted to be become supercar designer or weapon designer.
Due low grade in 12th.I got admission in computer science instead of mechanical.
c was introduced in 1st sem.
Score well in first year.
college offer me to change my field cs -> mechanical
4 year later (now)
2 drop's
1) due to health
2) financial issues
happy to be full stack developer.
still like cars and weapons but choosed cs as my real career.16 -
I hate this work from home shit with your family around. "You're always in front of the computer, go workout, go socialize, its family time"
What part of "work from home" you don't understand. SMH!9 -
Weekends be like:
Half day = *thinking* what should I do in weekend
Half day= *thinking in regret* I didn't do anything productive
😂😂😂3 -
I already wrote one rant about how my family deals with me being a developer, but this rant I wanna dedicate to people close to my family and what they actually think...
Earlier this year I ended school, so I was supposed to find a job. Well...I live in region where only small IT "companies" exist. It is really hard to find job as a developer around here. These small companies either do not want to hire anyone or they just hire people with super amazing university or just family members and friends. Anyway, I did not want to move to the capital city, so I just kept seraching...and that is how this family friends started to be fucking toxic.
While searching for job everyone just kept telling me how am I lazy as fuck and will not just go digging fucking drains or work for minimum wage to some korean shit company around here. Of course not literally, but I can see when someone starts to look at me as I am completely crazy. Our family lost many fake friends who just do not understand because of this. But it did not ended here...
When I finally found a job 1.5 month earlier, I was so happy. Job from home in relative good company. Ho Lee Fuk! Nobody believes me I am actually working. People look at me as I am a lazy fuck laying all day in bed and watching fucking TV. I am done with these dick people.
End of story.2 -
*while drinking tea at cafe area*
me*thinking* : may be this is going to solve that error
yes
yess
yesssss
I got solution
but wait let's first drink this tea then I will try this solution
*came back on desk*
me*thinking* : -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
what was solution ? wtf?1 -
It's 1:20am
Body: let's sleep.
Heart: beer or rum.
Brain: why the hell js is not working as expected? -
me : what is your age?
she : never asked girl her age
*found her linkedIn profile bsc from XYZ clg : 2009-12*
-_-
really easy to find information of many people's now a days.
just need basic google dork know.13 -
My life was total mess up before this I.e.
Break
Return from death door
Drop in education
Financial unstable
Literally 1.5-2years was worst.
From last 3-5 months
I gave up FB(personal account ,I need it for digital marketing)
Unfollow every entertainment page from Instagram
Join Twitter
Increase activity in devrant
Subscribe to development related content in reddit
New YouTube channel just for learning purpose (never search songs and other stuff on it)
Start reading books like zero to one,think and grow rich....
Biography's of great people's like
Steve jobs
Elon Musk
Shivaji Maharaj
And many more
Stop chatting on stupid topics (hot girls,....)
Attained meditation camp
Start meditation (Vipassana)
Life feels more sorted
Thanks everyone13 -
OS : Tail OS ✓
pass : 16+ ✓
Update password : every 15 days ✓
Mac address : spoofing ✓
Then you realise
Your Aadhar information is in gov DB.
14 -
My last to last companies boss.
He was kernal in INDIAN ARMY.
Once customer call me now start using bad words ,I try to stop my self and trying to be a professional person but he was asshole.
So I start using bad words.
Immediately cut his internet connection and cctv connection everything which was in my hand?
I told him to come office.
He was 45 year person ,I was 19 year boy ,he bring some friends to beat me.
My boss got this news ,he immediately come to office n locked my cabin.
Stand infront of them.
N hold customers collars.
Told him that I don't know your background but I was kernal ,I believe in my employ ,he will never crossed his limit until you crossed your.
If you touch him out of office then I will show my power.
Before that he not even asked me any question.14 -
Mom asked me one question.
How money transfer from one bank to another?
It was longest communication we ever had in few months.
I am happy for that question.
😊😊😊😊6 -
I was reading devrant.
Obviously I was laughing while reading different rant's.
My curious friend
F: what are you reading? Look's something funny.
M: devrant
F: what?
M: it is developer's community.
F: show
*After reading few rant's*
F: 😪
Nothing interesting
M: don't ask me again about your pc , mobile, software issues
😏2 -
!rant
Many dev ranting that apple is reached $1T by selling stupid connector's...... and other shit.
I am not apple product owner.
But Today I want to salute steve jobs.
A person without college degree,drug addiction,guilt of adopted son,financial issue's without any god father........................
Created one company.
Kicked out from own company.
Joinned again.
developed such policy in company that every one should follow.
took retirement due to cancer and all right's transfer to A Gay CEO.
and
now that company reached $1T.
Really fucking motivational thing.
Nothing is impossible.26 -
I would like to share my gum collection at work. I like chewing something. I bought all of these though. We dont have free food in our work.
19 -
What the fuck man.
Why even I am working with this assholes.
Yesterday,Our technical support guy reinstalled windows(I don't mess up with technical issues because then it will be my part time job,so I show that I don't know anything about hardware).
He installed fucking 32 bit window,He was trying to installed 64 bit version thunderbird.
He wasted my whole day.16 -
client : show website
me: sir server is down
client : what? I don't know,I want to see my website.
me: sir try to understand it is not my issue
client *call cut*
fucking asshole -_-1 -
long message
whatsapp : * scroll *
reply : depend on last line happy sad whatever emoji ,sent same
devrant : *something important ,I must read everything* -
I booked one domain for my client.
Which is mi*****.***
Now he want new domain with following change
Mi*****.***
😑🙄😏😥2 -
today I saw conditions in the gov office.
their fucking web app from ancient time depended on IE browser.
And
We were expecting productivity from them.
=_=3 -
Got scammed on devrant by sketchy cryptocoin recovery services? Like a total dumb ass you clicked a sketchy link? Did you suffer temporary retardation and believed a scammer?
You may be entitled to public humiliation! Contact our services (totally not sketchy AF) and get doxxed, reposted, and made to look like a complete fool! (Javascript devs excluded, they suffer enough just existing.)
1-800-dumb-fuk wtfuthinking@dumbass.git
4 -
!Dev
Not all Asians are the SAME. Let me explain, I got a coworker who goes by the name "Lau Dum Fuk" (which I learnt that it is pronounced "loud doom fok"). I was so stupid that I pronounced his name as "Loud Dumb Fuck" very awkward. I am Asian but I pronounced Asian name wrong . Who started with the idea that all Asian are the same?16 -
WOW!! What a fucking cop out. After what happened yesterday about branching. my senior and our boss had a meeting and I wasn’t included. My senior then message me to next time dont create another branch just use the existing branch even if it was merged. I said “ok but i thought thats the best practice, we we’re doing that since the beginning”. Senior then responded “Whats best practice for our boss, that will be our best practice” what a fucking cop out!!! Bitch!!23
-
Thinking to start business
Vegetables at door step.
I have 100+ farmers in contact. Who can provide vegetables daily.
What is your view/suggestion on it.20 -
Don't scroll here.
Go and live a real life,
Don't make a computer screen as your world,
there is a beautiful world outside of your cave,
Talk with people's face to face,
go
go
go.
Ok enough philosophy, Time to add new shit in current shitty code.
(-_-)5 -
This scene is an 8-year-old.
My friend(F) got his first mobile. First featured mobile.
Maximum smartness in that mobile was a snake game and Bluetooth.
So I decided to prank him.
M: Bro do you know this particular model need a network to use Bluetooth?
F: I am not stupid to believe you.
M: I can prove that.
F: K prove me, I will give you treat.
M: ok, turn on your Bluetooth paired it with my Bluetooth.
F: Ok
*start sending him the movie. We were on the train, a train was about to enter the tunnel*
M: When the train will enter a tunnel, We will lose network and sending will fail.
F: ok let's see.
*when a train enters in a tunnel, we shift light to black in meantime for 3-4 sec our eyes feel blindness. so I closed eyes before entering a tunnel and once train enter in the tunnel immediately restart Bluetooth *
M: look sending failed
F: Seriously man, I didn't know that.
M: It's ok bro next time inform me before buying any electronics.
F: sure
M: my treat?
F: Yup
*for next few days, he was thinking that Bluetooth need a network to send files until whole group laugh on him*4 -
!RANT
my friend who never smoke or drink or relationship to much career oriended.working in multinational company. recently south african petrol company gave offer letter to him.
he was ill from few days.(completed his engineering in civil with 9.1 pointer last year.)
somekind of syndrome found in him. due to which he will not able to walk in 2 years.
he share this information with me. asking me tips,"how to inform my mom dad? I don't wan to face them. I can't do anything for them."
life is fucking unfair with some peoples.1 -
I am listening EDM from 3days and Today this notification reminds me,Google data stealing and selling to other companies.
2 -
Sometimes it's irritating
Workstation in office : windows/Mac
Home : Ubuntu
Virtual machine : fedora
Developing : LFS (just for hobby)
😂😂😂
Still searching for arch and BSD 😂😂7 -
Best Hardware support team.
I hope every one of you got such team.
My keyboard was not working properly.
programmer's most used special character ; is auto typing anywhere that is obviously keyboard issue so I called H/W support team.
me: *explained above problem.*
supporter : Ya we know that issue ,YOUR HARD DRIVE IS CORRUPTED. We have 2 option
1) either we can formate your system.
2) We have to change hard drive.
Me thinking : *devrant stuff found*
Me: that is really sad part. How many time you solved such problem?
S: This is my first time in this company ,previously I solved such issue more than 10 time.
Me: you really look smart.
S: thank you,any how I will resolved this issue today.
Me: today I am going earlier but yes we will meet on monday. thank you for quick response.7 -
bought one of most trending things domain name.
daily 1m+ hit every day for that keyword.
little confuse
what is next ?4 -
I can't sleep whenever I remember ,few year before I paid $25 for ethical hacking workshop and they show us inspect element n SQL map
-
My employer uses latest and greatest macbooks. It's fuking awesome. I wasn't a fan until I found the ease of android and iOS development on it. I even started using Atom for web development. And I bought a Mac mini for a dedicated jenkins server. I don't think I'll ever go back to windows. There's just no point. I know it's expensive but it gets the job done. No more fukin mac VMs on VMware. Fuk that shit.20
-
"Dear Team,
This is to inform you that due to the workload of Diwali 10th Nov would be working a half day
So the 10th Nov holiday would be shuffle to 17th Nov 2018 (i.e. Saturday)
Note:- Those team member taking leave on 10th Nov it would calculate 5 days of leave."
Got this mail -_-9 -
Anybody who is crying for slow machine issue. You can do this think.
1. Replace your HDD with ssd (256gb in 3500 INR)
2. buy DVD shape hdd holder (cost 700 INR)
3. replace DVD with this case
Benefits :
Speed up
No need to worry about data backup
Enjoy
My boot time of window 10
3 mins to 15sec17 -
Note for managers,
If your intern doing 6hours task in 3 hours doesn't mean he is ready for next task.
It is fucking mean that he did his task give him time to take some breath.1 -
Need suggestion:
I gave interview in small company. They give me task to complete one project then we will give you job.
It takes me 2 weeks.
Now they are ready to give me job but they want that project in free of cost. What should I do?7 -
Me: ill use media queries to make our site responsive (site is not responsive before i got here)
Me: code ...
Me: code ...
Me: done, created a PR
Senior: review... removes all the code and media queries and said. We dont have to use media queries because bootstrap is already responsive.
- BULLSHIT! We still need media queries!!!!!27 -
what are your fav songs while coding?
mine:
old bollywood (black and white) songs and instrumental music mostly hariprasad chaurasia's flute.13 -
What the actual fuck GitHub/CircleCI?!??
I transformed a GitHub account into an organisation and lost admin access to a repo even though I'm the owner of the organisation. Now I can't even access the settings for the repo on CircleCI. What the hell? WHAT THE HELL?!!?! THE FUKKKKKKKKKKKk? -
When I got in this job:
No test, 0% coverage
No teamwork
No documentation (front and backend)
Senior doesnt want to talk
1year later:
We have test prolly 10% coverage
Still no team work
No documentation
Senior doesn’t want to talk
Ps: tried doing documentation but I cant unless my senior will help me because I dont know the ins and outs of the codebase.
I say crap.11 -
one of our sales manager ask me,
"what so difficult to build ecommerce website, we work more than you because we strugle on field."
I just smile and start walking.6 -
well now that I put my wallet through the wash and these "very important" vaccine passport cards were in there that disintegrated (also by the way the email with the digital vaccine cards they sent me doesn't have a PDF attachment but has a link to a PDF file -- that is now 404! whatcha trying to hide, fuckers?). evidently fake vaccine passport creation is the only sort of fraud the Quebec government cares about, since there was a news story recently how the council for discovering fraud is just 95% faking vaccine cards fraud (kicker I've never heard of this council, seems they've only been active in the post covid era), nevermind that that shit fucked me up and I've had dementia at 30 for 3 years now, with my body having self heating / metabolism issues, pink blood or clots showing up everywhere issues, a fucking purple toe (actually I would just randomly turn purple on and off, and once yellow! I'm sure my liver is fine), numbness in my left side, hands, feet, mania / feeling like you're dying... but anyway it's all in your head and fuck off stop calling 911
I decided I would take a photo of the papers (since they're so important and came at such a cost!) and evidently now my camera app crashes anytime I try to take a photo. rebooted. somehow my photo viewer app updated with a reboot but the camera app is still busted.
I think this is a sign I should root my phone
but I'm already doing 4 things right now. on top of being reminded of my fucking medical trauma making this post RN I guess
fuk19 -
One more startup proposal
And
I accept it
$500
One condition
I will not maintain anything.
Plot twist : it was my toy project
Every week I will show progress.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂6 -
believe me,
when your companies non-technical HOD(marketing), start a discussion with you on topics like Elon Musk and other hot topics in the technical world.
It feels good
2 hours no code just discussion on fav topics.3 -
most productive workflow I ever seen.
excel 1 : stock
excel 2 : order
compare stock with order manually 1000+ product.
excel 3 : check history of order generator (shop)
excel 4 : today's price of product + tax
excel 5 : alot specific unit's of product
excel 6 : maintained bill credit/debit
next step : forword to managers for approval
excel 7 : edit's from nanager
process repeat till managers approval
excel 8 : dispatched history
excel 9 : return product (reason's/unit)
excel 10 : stock update return + new product's
and few more excel's
data of 5+ year's
daily 500+ order's
lPO listed company
i have not mentioned account and other stuff
(╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻2 -
confession time:
I am php laravel developer with little knowledge about nodejs.
I got selected by one startup as nodejs developer.
frankly I am not better nodejs developer than my competition who were rejected.
I completed oral interview with my nodejs theory knowledge at a time of technical round , they gave us task to create crud with fantastic front end and nodejs mongo as a back end.
I developed front end in bootstrap but at a time of backend, I just copy paste code from github.
and changed everything variable and other proof to hide reality. in mean time other candidates were actually coding everything then I took time to understand this code and I submitted after few candidates.
in last round they ask me to explain code which I explained properly and I get salary 40k/month INR.
I know it is cheating but I wanted this job badly.6 -
May be it is small thing to many people's but as a less experience Developer it is big thing for me.
I AM GOING TO LEAD PROJECT.😊
Ohk project is not so big..3 -
trying to login fb
username : ...........
pass : ...................
without thinking just type that pass
error changed pass 2 year back
again try to remember same password
:(
unable to remember1 -
Not a rant
After coding, cooking/ book reading is my favorite hobby.
Before last 3 month I took dcsn to give a shot to my other hobby cooking and pause on coding for few months.
I decided to give 100days to my cafe.
Arranging money and perfect location took 2 months , on 16 july I started my cafe not so fancy, just sweet simple.
Means 30 days we're completed,
I was earning 1000 inr as software developer, i am earning 10000 inr daily . My net profit is 1500inr
Moral of the story
Don't hesitate to take risk
Believe on yourself
Never never never start with partnership
Currently I have to pay 1.5 lakh to my ex business partner who left cafe in first 15 days
N
Forget personal life. Your business is your priority.
Not spend even १ full day with my family and gf in last 3 months.
Soon I will back in software.
Have a good day to everyone.11 -
I am a hobby programmer, far away from finally turning my hobby into a profession BUT already they ask me to fix their FUCKING PRINTERS........ whooot da fuk?!?!3
-
friend : bro which phone may I buy?
me : mi / honor
next day
f : bro are you sure?
m : yup pretty sure ,in your budget this 2 are best phone
after 3-4 day
*call*
f : bro I buy phone.
m : congo , which pne ?
f : oppo f9
o(╥﹏╥)o5 -
first time trapped in cooperate politics. -_-
"chaliye es khel ko shuru kiya jaye"
"let's start the game "4 -
I just wrote ”o fuk u vue” as a commit message. That’s how I feel about the composition api fucking me in the arse at every turn.4
-
Got asked by a coworker for some help, looked at the code and told him it could be written better and show him the example.
His reply : "It's not easy to read for me"
That was ok but then, now here's the kicker, he asked another coworker to come and see which was easier to read.
You did what mate?
So of course i got pissed and went out for a smoke just to return to see my version being used.
WHY THE FUCK DID YOU ARGUE ABOUT READABILITY IF YOU"RE GOING TO USE IT ANYWAY???
Fuken fuk, never again am i going to offer optimization support to people. -
Here’s a snippet of code that I found in our production codebase. I found this while fixing a bug. This is not part of the bug though but I see this a problem. Should I say this to my senior that his logic is off here?
First he doesnt have to do explicitly strict comparison since the return type is boolean and it could be true or false. Also the returnUrl will alway be undefined because redirectIfUserLoggedIn is called first before it was set.
He dosent like me. Hell get mad for sure. I think ill let this go.
37 -
Meeen fvck this shit. After my student loan I’m out in this shit ass company men.
So I’m fixing a frontend bug. I’m so into it that I opened more than 10 tabs. So i called my senior on what I found then he want to test something on my workstation so i said im cool with it and then i closes all the TABS man. Comeon!!
Ps: the tabs are sequentially opened to track the bug.12 -
!rant
hey dev's,
I need help for choosing laptop.
I will need it for deep learning.
DELL G7 7588
config:
pro : i9-8950HK
gpu : GTX 1060
ram : 16 gb ddr4
ssd : 512
hdd : 1TB
your reviews please42 -
Yey I got a raise. From 55,000 to 56,500 annually. Go Junior me! Hahahaha. Not enough for California though but I’m grateful.10
-
My job in company to developed e-commerce website as a full stack developer.
History of that project.
Company paid 300,000 INR to the local web development firm for developing previous website and they developed website without bootstrap/SSL/Even save information of high profile client in plain text.
I am not angry on that web firm ,I am laughing on my company because such client never trust on independent developers who work hard ,code day and night to complete freelancing projects.
I hope my work will make differnce in their selling. -
Reason to hate my D grade engineering college.
1st lecture of web development.
(Syllabus html,css,PHP)
Expectation : at least teacher will introduce fucking web development technologies.
Reality:
Teacher=> look I don't know anything about PHP so learn from web. I will give you internal marks just submit assignment on time.
😅
Btw it is not story.3 -
Fucking unreal bro!!! I’m working on an issue and I pushed, then there was a bug, i fixed it again, another issue for the UI change, another fixed for sorting column. All that fixed I created separate branch. My boss called me and told me im stupid for creating a separate branch everytime on a simple fix, he told me that Git isnt used that way. He told me that his been doing this 30years already. So I asked isnt it the best practice to create a separate branch on every issue or if the branch has been merged? His answer is no. Fuck this guy and his 30years experience
I should’ve responded:
First of all, if we have a test suite then I would have notice that error but we dont. You dont even want to upgrade ruby and rails. We’re stuck at version 4 on rails. Second why are you merging my MR and reviewing it on IST? Why didnt you do that locally so you can address the issue before you merged? Third fuck you and your 30years
My actual response is:
Ahh yes sir, im sorry wont happen again, my bad, sorry for that mistake.
Fuck bro im mad!!!!4 -
So i applyed for a remote job recently and they assigned me a project as a test. The only requirement is i have to use sails.js as framework along with angular. I am thinking of quitting before i even started. Two days reading the sails documentation and it sucks big time. I am searching how to use sessions and it explains me what a session is. Fuk dis i am out.3
-
I feel lucky to be a developer.
yes just keep frustrating hours of debugging and other boring stuff aside for a moment.
I love to solved physical problem with digital solutions, I worked as a full stack developer in company using same skills to earn money by doing freelancing.
while my other non techie friends are crying for extra income, I earn enough in freelancing to pay my rent and other stuff
😍😍😍😍2 -
When people are thinking that just by deleting UIDAI number ,their phone is hack free now.🤣🤣
This are same people who installed app from SHAREit , access adult content without proxy n JavaScript off ,access raile net /public net and enter private information.🤣🤣2 -
Unable to access cpanel/whm due to IP changed error.
called HR
me : please connect me to networking team (out sourced)
hr : why ?
me : I have some issue to access cpanel. I contacted to hosting comapny but it is not their fault so may be it's our network issue.
hr : explain me in details.
me : ok
from morning I am trying to access whm because our website is out of bandwidth limit and showing 509 error ,I contacted to hosting comapny but they explained me problem from our side. SO i wanted to talk with network team about this issue because I am not using any proxy or vpn even my tor browser is off too still ip chaged error giving frustation. second reason I am frusted that my public IP and private IP is not chaged.
one more your windows pc freeze 3 times from morning.
do you need in detailed technical reason why I want to talk with them.
hr : no no no *hang up*
after 2 minute *my landline ring*
hr : network engineer on other side.
fair enough2 -
Friend (civil engineer) : bro do you have windows cd?
Me : no but why?
F: I want to format my pc.
M : then buy genuine copy.
F : don't want to waste money in that.
M : then don't cry for lagging windows 😂😂😂
F : do you have any cost efficient way?
M : yes ,but tell me one thing ,why do you need a computer?
F : browser , office , Dropbox ( cad installed in his desk which have genuine windows)
*After 10 minutes of conversation*
F: I will bring laptop , install Ubuntu in it2 -
one more time, I proud of my team and MD too.
XYZ is our office boy. He completed his BSc IT from 3rd Grade college due to family condition and lack of knowledge, he has to work as an office boy.
So my team decided to teach him web development. We are starting it from very basic. We get total 1:30 hours of a lunch+snack's break so each one of us will give 1-day to teach him but It is not free. We will need good coffee in this deal. Our MD like this idea and promised us that once we gave him a green signal. He can do his first internship here. -
Hi. I just wanted to share I failed the google online interview. Thought I was prepared, I vomit and had diarrhea 30mins before the interview, Always makes mistakes on google docs. I keep pressing tabs which uglifies the code, miss-spelled my variables and functions name, mistakenly put everything in const (I got used to my editor yelling at me when I used const instead of let, should not rely on this). But there's always next time. I hope.6
-
I can’t believe I used UILabels instead of UITextFields for rant and comment cells in my devRant rewrite... Now I have to remake those cells again. Fuck.6
-
Little story.
Manager give me task, Send mail through mail chimp to many groups and schedulled them differntly.
Day1 : it litterly waste my half hour.
Night 1 :create script using Selenium (utilize my 2 hours because It was new for me.)
Day 2 : I am devrant. (script is doing my task)
Manager is also happy that I am doing extra work. -
promise yourself
you will never ever show your geek knowledge to stupid people's.
or ready to face some stupid hacking questions.3 -
Let me rant! I don’t usually do this but this is just frustrating and draining. Please tell me if im wrong. We have authentication that needs to be refactored. I was assigned on this issue. Im a junior btw. I also attached an image of my proposals. The issue of the old way of our signup process is that when validation fails they will keep on accepting the TaC (terms and conditions) and on our create method we have the validation and creating the user. Basically if User.create(user_params) create else throw invalid end. (Imma take a photo later and show it you)which needs to be refactored. So I created a proposal 1. On my first proposal I could create a middleware to check if the body is correct or valid if its valid show the TaCs and if they accept thats the moment the user is created. There is also additional delete user because DoE told me that we dont need middlewares we have before and after hooks! (I wanted to puke here clearly he doesn’t understand the request and response cycle and separation of concerns) anyway, so if middleware is not accepted then i have to delete the user if they dont accept the TaCs. Proposal 2. If they dont want me to touch the create method i could just show the TaCs and if they dont accept then redirect if they do then show form and do the sign process.
This whats weird (weird because he has a lot of experience and has master or phd) he proposes to create a method called validate (this method is in the same controller as the create, i think hes thinking about hooks) call it first and if it fails then response with error and dont save user, heres the a weird part again he wants me to manually check on each entity. Like User.find_by_email(bs@g.com) something like that and on my mind wtf. Isnt it the same as User.create(user_params) because this will return false if paras are invalid?? (I might be wrong here)
This is not the first time though He proposes solutions that are complex, inefficient, unmaintainable. And i think he doesnt understand ruby on rails or webdev in particular. This the first time i complained or I never complained because im thinking im just a junior and he hs more experience and has a higher degree. This is mot the case here though. I guess not all person who has a higher degree are right. To all self thought and bachelors im telling you not all people who went to prestige university and has a higher degree are correct and right all the time. Anyway ill continue later and do what he says. Let me know if im wrong please. Thanks
4 -
Searching new laptop / system on current laptop / system can hurt feelings of it.
It's same as asking gf which is better girl than you 😂😂😂😂2 -
Strangermeet up conversation
Stranger: m22
Me: just sleep bro ,u can't get girl here.
Stranger : can't sleep R8 now, reading quantum computing book.
Me : interesting
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Yes we are now friends (#~#) -
Went to meet up last night. I was there acting like I have no experience and was just starting to learn programming. Suddenly this guy turns and faced me he said non verbatim “don’t use JavaScript thats the worst programming language, its used by wanna be software engineer. Use c# they have blazor so you wont have to code using JS”. My blood pressure went up guys. I understand this because hes kinda old and dont want to learn new things but i got caught off guard. To be honest im not mad, im just sad though, imagine if i was really new and had no experience and just started few months ago. All the hard work and studying will be nothing. Btw hes nice he offered me free food and beer its just JS.
If you’re learning any language specifically JS. Dont mind the naysayers. Just learn it and be good at it. Languages has its use cases. Conversation with whats better programming language is useless and a waste of time thats what my professor said and its true.15 -
Senior: “we can go remote now, but you have to report what you did at the end of the day. Ex: 7am clock in work on bla bla to 10am. 10am -12nn still working on bla bla. Til end of day.”
What a crap. Now I don’t want to work remote with this bunch of reports at the end the day. Some bullshit in here.3 -
As someone who has been developing a game (not even close to 20% done) and dealing with bug reports, I'm pissed off by this one report from a game I play, which I'll just shamelessly copy-paste it here for y'all to read and rant
"Title: [sic]lag never fixed
[sic]i dont wanna report lag doesnt mean there's no lag ,
the LAG is real, and is getting worse and worse everyday, vespa please fix the problem,
i used to think i could bear this lag, but i cant ,i just cant, after 5+ times game crashing everyday,my patient is losing . you say u are fixing it every maintenance,but what is this BXXX SXXX?all i could see it you are trying your best to grab money from my wallet(well u FXXXING successed),and the promise you made to fix the lag never ever ..........
sorry for my bad Chiglish, but./......"
I'm not a developer of the game, but this pisses me off. The guy wants fixes on the "lag"; which lag?? latency?? FPS?? random freezes??; while giving absolutely ZERO details on the "lag" AND accusing the company of stealing money without doing sh-t, which is not true as far as I can tell in-game. So, I instinctively waltzed in and ranted at how sh-t the report is in detail, and accused him of inhibiting the game's development because of his sh-t report, and he replied with this (I told him I'm a game dev in the reply I mentioned):
"[sic]as a person who made this game should know what lag is just like u know what fuk is as a human being,and i said game crash ,thats the best way i could explain as a normal player not like you an arrogant indie game dev!and if u cant understand what course the game crash,as a player like me how could i know, thats the reason im asking for help here,and i hope they dont have such indie game dev like you who doesnt know lag(game crash)"
M-th-rf-ck-r. For the first time, I see true ignorance. While writing this, I'm typing my next reply for the m-th-rf-ck-r that lacks common sense on reporting a bug. For f-ck sake if I found him I'll put a bullet through his head.2 -
Men fo real! I dont rant so much because I think its a negative attitude but let me do it anyway! Listen. My boss boss told me to create a dynamic drop which I did. A backend request then display it on the frontend which is easy, then on code review he ask why do we need this error handling. Bruh as soon as I heard that question, I got covid. Bitch we do need that error handling because if theres error on requests it will set to default options, but I didn’t say anything tho. I just ask what will happen if there’s an error?, he said I don’t think a simple request will respond error if you did it right. Then I agreed and remove the code. Hot damn! Mind you guys. When they started the app there are no test code. 0, nada, nothing inside the spec folder.7
-
in JavaScript I would just call something what it is and then keep changing the data type as I get more data to add to it because you can
in rust because it's not dynamic types but static and everything is a static struct I need to find like 9 different names for all the different intermediary data types and holy shit I don't understand what to name everything and this is annoying me
I never understood why people complained about naming problems. I found it fun. now I hate it.
stats object. cool. well it converts an address to stats. an address has swaps. each swap was done on a mint. so I guess I make a MintStats object? wrong. because that's confusing.
swaps -> swaps divided by the mint they belong in -> stats for each mint swap set -> then you can add all the mint swap set stats to the address stats object
now what the fuck do you call all these
there's also something I called a MintAttitude and it's an enum. these types just keep growing out of trees. fuk. I don't like long names either. I should probably just call it Attitude but call it via mint::Attitude and get the same clarity result with far less redundancy (which I hate, another annoying thing)
swaps -> ??? mint history? -> MintStats -> then I have a "MintData" that has the history and stats wrapped in it -> MintsData that has many mints and their MintData -> then I can convert MintsData into AddressStats but what and I hate this and also I have a Mint object that does something totally different elsewhere. I hate this. data isn't even descriptive but to call something history when it also has stats seems imprecise.
brain spaghetti. classification part of my brain is shit. no historical training / experience either. I just see everything like vague blobs. bah. naming required clear delineations which is hard enough on its own to get used to5 -
Hey read this. This shit is funny. HAHAHA
I was fixing a bug right. The bug was throwing InverseOfAssociationNotFoundError in our rails admin page when deleting a user. So the director of engineering called and we had an argument because he was insisting that the error InverseOfAssociationNotFoundError is OUR IMPLEMENTATION. HAHAHAHAHA. my goodness. I showed him that the error comes from the constraints when deleting a user. A table has no relation to the user table but my senior added it anyway for some reason. I was mad and laughing at the same time because I showed him the documentation and the simple fix. These idiot keep flexing his 30 years of experience. HAHAHA3 -
jr.: which os may I used for our syllabus?
me: look every OS has it's own pron and cons .
jr : ohh. still tell me.
me: but linux is superior among them. use ubuntu.4 -
It is this time of the year that I get to work on a shitty project to add some new functionality to it, it is a front end part of the project which before was externally developed, so now I have to deal with this BS Marionette mess where nothing they wrote comply to standards, like the fucking router.js doesn't look anything like the Marionettes doc, the bootstrap they used they fking decided to override classes in custom css and turn the 12 col grid system into 5ths or shit, then they created some autmated tests with bunch of intricated selectors selecting by 'labels' instead of !!!!FUCKING WHAT ARE THIS FOR IDs!? - fuk me - so I better decide to procrastinate on this project since luckily enough we don't have a deadline and I wouldn't care if we had either! My job is java developer, and yes I feel good about learning new things and learning front end. BUT NOT THIS CRAP DEPRECATED MttehorseShit!
-
2 min silence for my friend.
who got contract to edit and make golden frame of "naga baba"
he have to zoom each and every part of naga baba to clear and make render image.
xD XD16 -
Ahhhh...
Finally project shifted on their server and everything working as expected.
Finally I can take breathe for a minute.
In mind(why don't I called her and make some movie plan)
..
..
.
Second client call :
Hey can you come to office our IVR not working properly?
Life sucks man -
just realize, I have not talked face to face with anybody in a whole day
(little conversation on phone and chat)
total of 8 peoples in my office room including me and 30 + in the whole office.
that means either every device working properly in office or it's my luckiest day.4 -
I used mint, Ubuntu,Kali but now I want to change my Linux flavour.
My work is mostly on backend development (PHP, MySQL).
Which one may I try next?
(All previous Linux are f9 for me I just want to use new distro)3 -
Ok its been an hour now trying to find a way to push a NEW commit to a MERGED branch. SMH! Help gitlab!7
-
This got me fucked up. Listen yo.
So we have this issue on our modal right. The issue keeps poppin. It's a hotfix because its in prod. So my senior and I were on it. After a few hours, I showed him the part of the code that is buggy. It's 50 lines of code of nested if-else, else-if. And so we're still fighting it. He redid everything since we're using angular2 he did a subject, behavior-subject all that bs and I was still trying to understand what's the bug, because it's happening on the second click and so I did my own thing and found the cause bug and showed it to him, its this:
setTimeout( () => {}, 0)
the bootstrap-modal doesn't allow async inside it (I dont why, its in the package). So he explained to me why it's there. So I did my own thing again and find a workaround which I did, a one-line of angular property, showed it to him he didn't accept it because we'll still have to redo it with subjects and he was on it. I said ok. Went back to my previous issue. The director came in and ask for a fixed, my senior came up to me and told me to push my fix. Alright no problem. So we good now. Went back to our thing bla bla bla, then got an email that we will have a meeting, So we went, bla bla bla. The internal team wants a support for mobile, senior said no problem bla bla bla, after the meeting he approaches me and said (THIS IS WHERE IT GOT FUCKED UP) we wont be supporting bootstrap4 anymore because of the modal issue and since we're going to support mobile and BOOTSTRAP4 grid system is NONINTUITIVE we are moving to material design because the grid system is easier. I was blown away man. we have more than 100 components and just because of that modal and mobile support shit he decided to abandon bootstrap. Mater of fact its the modal its his code. I'm not expert in frontend but I looked at the material design implementation its the same thing other than the class names. OHHH LAWD!3 -
Hey Devranter's from mumbai
Why not we meet somewhere in Mumbai?
Please tag other ranter's in comment Who are from Mumbai.
@Floydian16 -
I always get great satisfaction by reworking and rebuilding ul li menus cos you know it's 2018 and fuk dat shit 90's implementation
-
can you share some interesting and useful topics for a web developer(PHP), who want to become nodejs based full stack developer?
udemy courses link will be useful.2 -
*deletes env var* "I'll just hard code this to localhost for now, my ci/cd pipeline will setup everything later"
*Pushes to master, forgets to undo*
Aw fuk,
I should of just changed the .env file -
Pgadmin4 error: could not connect to server
Tried to delete data from pgadmin folder but didn't worked for me2 -
Meeeen this is crazy. The director created a testing route inside the actual api controller instead inside the spec file. Common man. We better than this. 🤦🏻♂️2
-
Hello devrant,
Need guidance about QR code based coupon system.
In my restaurant I sale few food items. My 50+ customer bought food daily (on delivery). They are asking me for coupon system like I sale one sandwich for half 30 INR , they bought 3-4 per day.
So they can buy coupon of 100 sandwich on every delivery my delivery boy will scan QR code of customer and their sandwich count will decrease accordingly.
This will apply for every food item.
Can you suggest me current software for this.1 -
I'm in a big fat fucking stinking rut, as in progress on this project has absolutely stagnanted.
Gonna rubber face your duck now **UNZIPS** excepts I don't have zippers, as joggers are the one true way; fake Adidas til I fucking drop.
Brain damage aside, I understand both how I've layed out the data and what I'm supposed to do with it. We have a virtual machine, an array of instructions and arguments for a given process within it, and we need to walk this array and map values to registers.
We also need to spill values inside registers to stack, IF they are required at a further point within that block. This also isn't terribly complex. We simply look forward in the array and see if the value is an argument to any instruction that *needs* this value to be loaded (ie, within a register).
So this implies multiple iterations; we need to better understand how one particular value is used throughout an F before we can make a final decision on how many registers and stack space are actually needed for the whole block.
Here's where it gets tricky. If there's a call, we need to be certain that the symbol being invoked has already been fully processed. Besides the obvious fact that recursion fucks me up, there's another matter: say a private method gets invoked by another private method. We can take advantage of this, by which I mean, sacrilege incoming so put on this toga.
Looking at the output for C compilers, it would seem this is not done in practice, I would assume because it's a pain in the ass. But when you have the guarantee that F will only be called internally, as that's what "private" means, there's two ways it can go:
0. It's well below the 13-20 cycle threshold, so you inline the fucker. No suprises there.
1. It's a more involved affaire, and invoked in more than one place, so you don't inline it. Codesize matters.
Recursion and [1] are the big deal things holding me back. Not because it's too hard, like I said this is kindergarten level abstraction. I'm just slow and fanatical, which is how I prefer to spell "constant obsessive paranoid delusions". I can see the potential optimization I can pull here, so I'm stuck trying to figure it out.
Idea would be, handling the register allocation and stack spill for an internal-internal (or deep internal; what we like to call a "guts" method) in synchronization with the *calling* processes. This is, fundamentally, violating all conventions -- but so under the hood no one will notice.
Let me give you an example. If we were to pass some value to a function, expecting to mutate it and get a different value back, in a lot of cases it'd be stupid to make an implicit copy by using two registers, one for input and another for the output. Dude, it's one cycle. Multiply it by a million, say sixty times per second, for every time you __needlessly__ make a copy of a value that we've already stated is mutable.
Clearly unacceptable. This is, in the strictest sense, everywhere in every single codebase. Premature micro optimization is the root of all goodness, God is great and praiseworthy. So how do we go about it?
Answer is I know and I don't know. By which I mean to say, this very thing I've done by hand. Assembly is fun. Now the issue is teaching a calculator how to do it. Not so fun.
There is a dependency chain between processes, as I believe I've kind of alluded to. I'm trying to make decisions on the side of the caller depending on the details of the callee, which is why recursion is rawdogging my soul. This is the same situation, it's inverting the direction of one or more links in the dependency chain, which makes no fucking sense.
And yet it does.
Brain, explain yourself.
How do *you* handle this without crashing?
Brain?
<<ME STEWPED; BEEP-BOOP>>
Alright then, that was a useless attempt at fuckery. Let's have a nap then, maybe it'll come to me in the morning. That's what I've been saying to myself for almost a month now.
Perhaps it is a hardcoded fuk.1 -
When one thing append ( girlfriend bios brick ).. all the shit append at the same time ( HDD badsector, production fuk up, migration that work on local not work on production, etc ) this week is shit jezzz4
-
Hey devrant buddies,
I wanna learn AR development,
I am react developer,
May I go with viroAR or suggest something from your side4 -
can 2 modal which is static have a race condition error? I’m trying to fix a bug and when I showed it to my senior , I said maybe because of the first modal the style is not being applied on the second modal he then said “it might be a race condition” and I almost choked on my own saliva.
Ps: the first modal will show a loading text and a gif after that the second modal shows with some data.
I got confused how he think that it might be a race condition. We’re not doing webworks on the front end. Weird.2 -
@highlight
disabled: Set<string> = new Set();
@highlight
<input
class="form-control"
id="pushBack"
type="text"
[attr.disabled]="disabled.has('pushBack') ? ' ' : null"
[(ngModel)]="local.pushBack"
/>
---
Do you know what's wrong with this code? If you know and you are a junior how would you tell this to your super boss without hurting his feelings?7 -
Electronjs "framework to developed cross platform desktop application but not able to install in Ubuntu😢"6
-
hey folks,
need opinion about prisma grahql.
is it mature tech for ecommerce platform?
documentation and online help?1
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