Dat ass

Taken from Reddit 😂😂😂😂

Dark theme is soothing 😋

Taken from Quora

I. FUCKING. HATE. MOBILE. DEVELOPMENT.

I already manage the data, devops, infra, and most of the backend dev.

We had a mobile guy. He was great. I never had to think about it and kept moving quickly on my work. #SpecializationOfLaborFTW

He left. Why? Because they wouldn't give him a small raise despite being one of the best mobile engineers in the firm. WTF.

I made the mistake of picking up just enough slack on this workflow in the interim such that I'm, apparently, the fucking god-damned release manager, fixer of pipelines, fixer of build configs, fixer of anything where someone just needs to RTFM for a half-hour to not fucking break things.

Now, 8 months later...and, apparently, Fortune 500 companies are too fucking god-damned cheap to pay for someone who actually knows WTF they're doing for a very reasonable thing to have at least one dedicated set of eyes for.

I never wanted to be a mobile dev.
I never will want to be a mobile dev.
And I certainly don't want to manage your HALF-FACE-FUCKED detached expo configs.

There's a reason I never intentionally involved myself in mobile. All the way down, it's just shitty cross-compilation, transpilation, dependency-hell, brittle-as-fuck build processes so we can foot-gun and mouth-gun react-native and expo and babel and whatever the fuck else cargo-culted horseshit into the wild.

And why? What's the actual fucking root cause? The biggest white elephant that ever fucking elephant-ed? It's because Apple and Google decided to never collaborate on a truly-native cross-platform SDK--where engineers could write native code that compiles to native binaries that's simply write-once, run-everywhere. They know they could have done that, and they didn't. So what'd they get back? Expo--a too-cleverly-designed backdoor/hack--more-or-less a way to circumvent the sane release process software has usually followed: code -> executable -> deploy. Or code -> deploy (for interpreted langs). Expo's like "keep your same executable, we're just gonna to do updates by injecting new code into it whenever we want". Didn't we learn anything with web? Shit gets messy real quick? Not to mention: HEY EXPO, WE WERE ALREADY BUILDING NATIVE APPS, YOU SHORT-SIGHTED FUCKS. THANKS FOR LURING OUR CTOs INTO FORCING EXPO DOWN OUR THROATS W/ THE IMPLICIT (BUT INCORRECT) TOO-GOOD-TO-BE-TRUE PROMISE THAT WE CAN HAVE WRITE-ONCE, RUN-ANYWHERE WITHOUT ANY BUY-IN OR COOPERATION FROM THE ACTUAL TARGET PLATFORMS.

And, we just, like, accept this? We all know it's garbage engineering. The principles we learned in the classroom aren't just academic abstractions--they actually yield real-world results--and eschewing them yields real-world failures. Expo is tightly-coupled to high-heaven, with leaky abstractions six-ways-to-christmas, chock-full of foot-guns, and fails the most basic test of quality: does it, "just work?"

Expo is fucking shameful and it should fucking die. Its promises are too bold, its land-mines too many, its future-proof-ness is alway, always, always questionable as fuck and a risk to every project that uses it.

You want a rant? This is my fucking venue, 'tis not? Well, then this is a piss and vinegar rant straight from my blood-red, beating fucking heart:

EXPO FUCKING SUCKS. AND IF YOU'RE A FAN, YOU FUCKING SUCK TOO.

When you spend too much time doing JS...

Unnecessary optimizations everywhere

lol this

JS memes are the best

Happy Christmas.

I once asked "in web development, what does CSS stand for?" some answered "Counter Strike Source"

*Me feeling productive on a day
Today I am going to start working on the complex part of my proect. Spends 1 hour deciding what all technologies to use , how to implement it, which design patterns to use .

Let's do it

*15 min later
Making some tiny css corrections

*3 hrs later
Making some tiny css corrections

*An eternity later
REALISED DIDN'T SET THE SIZE OF THE PARENT CONTAINER TO 100%

So much for thinking about being productive for today :(((

Ctrl+Q instead of Ctrl+W in Firefox. Yup happens every time.

They have no idea.

we have all been here on one side or the other...

Attend all the meetings, they said. They're super important, they said. You'll get more code done if we hyper-report on progress they said. The bugs are piling up and we need to have even more meetings, they said.

STOP SAYING THINGS AT ME AND LET ME FUCKING CODE YOU INSUFFERABLE CUNTS.

LONELINESS IS REAL
I am a freshman in a university ( about to complete my first year ) with a girl to boy ratio of around 1:10. During my first semester I was spending a lot of time with friends, chatting up with people and making connections. Due to this my productivity as a dev, if I am even capable of being called that decreased ( I was not a developer before joining , but I had an aim of being one , esp at least the best in my batch ) after 1st year. In retrospect I did nothing productive till 3 months out of 4 in my first sem and the guilt hit me hard . During the last month I had to catch up with my much neglected studies and all I had done was a little bit of html and css, and barely scratched the surface of js( please don't judge me for this :) , I had to start somewhere < although I learned a little bit of C++ > ). BUT I WAS A HAPPY CUNT, and had no sign of lonelines. Now during this sem , I had made progress ( learn js with es6 syntax and still learning, did c++ and extended my knowledge ) . Currently I am working on my Vue full stack app ( along with express and some websocket library , TBD ) < yeh I learnt some backend too > , and increasing my knowledge of dsa using clrs. Although my productivity has increased manifolds but I know feel the need of closure. I am kinda happy with the fact that I know a lot of people around here ( thanks to my extroverted 1st semester ) but sometimes it hits me hard at night when I don't have a monitor to drown my eyes and thoughts in. I have increased my academic performance too but I need someone to share and express my feelings with. I could have made a girlfriend earlier but now most of them are taken and I have lost touch. But believe me, all I want is a companion to spend these lonely days and night ( not talking about as a friend ). Staying away from home isnt easy you know...m :(

KUDOS TO DEVRANT FOR DEVELOPING A COMMUNITY WHERE PEOPLE LIKE ME CAN FEEL SAFE IN OUR NATURAL HABITAT. I COULDN'T HAVE EXPRESSED MY FEELINGS ANYWHERE ELSE EXCEPT IN A PERSONAL BLOG ( where no one would have read it )

PS1: I apologise if I sounded arrogant about any of my skill, I didn't mean that way. I ain't even that good, just kinda proud of myself a little for achieving something I couldn't have thought.

PS2: Any type of suggestions and help is much appreciated ( considering I am a college student who went into some serious development 4 months ago , I am pretty impressionable ;) )

PS3: Please don't confuse this with depression. I am HAPPY BUT LONELY

PS4: Is there a way so that I can change my username?

HTTP return codes....

Does balding scare the shit out of anyone else here? I am 19 and have started showing signs of male pattern baldness *sigh*. Just hope to make it to 25 without balding completely.

I hate it when your non dev friend uses top notch hardware and I am stuck with a piece of shit junk

Is anybody still watching Silicon Valley?

I spent an entire week debugging my JS Gameboy emulator an year ago.
(The "C" register was read-only for some reason)
Turns out I typed "с" (cyrillic) instead of "c".

!rant
Wrote my first unit test. Strangely feels satisfying.

Thanks to devrant , now I can be one those people trying to look social in one those so called meets with personal touch where everyone is scrolling their Facebook (still)

!rant

When people listen to a complete story and then ask who the villian was..

DEVS : It's like reading JavaScript and then asking what is "this"

There is 2 broken pet floor on both iOS and web

Sorry I’m too lazy to open a new issue on gh

When you are trying to be supportive to a colleague but he sees your act as condescension on your part. BITCH I DON'T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT YOU, BUT UNFORTUNATELY I HAVE TO WORK WITH YOU SO PLEASE KNOW THE BARE MINIMUMS TO DO THE TASK. Also he complained to others that he was offended . He was tryna learn react before knowing es6 and nodejs , doesn't know asynchronous and was strongly suggesting that our whole fucking team move to React and I just suggested some topics to look to. I carried his ass once , and seems like now will have to carry it once more :(

Wow, since vue passed react on gh, this is like a competition, but only for the stars.
It's been like 2 days that there's < 10 stars of difference.
Looks like shitpost that you see on facebook, where the likes are not use to "evaluate" a post, but mostly as a dummy counter.
Am i the only one to found this ridiculous?

Naming variables with meaningful names

Was interested to learn about OpenGL and WebGL. Just found out no fucking drivers exist for my graphics card on Ubuntu.
WTF AMD !!! Atleast provide some compatibility for your product if I am purchasing it !!!

My laptop's back is rugged and rough so I can't apply any sticker...
Imagine the horrorrrrrr

Woke myself up shouting hdcp at 4:40 am today!!!

I was explaining what hdcp was to my sister in the dream, why the HDMI cable wouldn't work..

Had a chuckle and continued to sleep, realizing what a nerd I am 😆

Who dreams about hdcp and hdmi cables?

- the first time I have to touch a GO codebase
- it's the day GH goes down

come on, what's happening here! First dR, now GH? Tomorrow what - SO's turn?

Hello all, Just started with the Rant.

Dumb ass

Does anyone here just wake up and feel shitty for absolutely no reason why ? When I say absolutely no reason means none whatseover from previous day etc . I wanna know if it's just me 😅

Got my stickers in the mail today, just before I left for my new job. Thanks from Ireland devRant

- Over a dozen of pub projects on my gh

- the one and only that I'm excited about least [and ashamed most] gets all the stars

not sure whether everyone is actually struggling with creative x-fi usb soundcard on linux or my other projects are even shittier than that one..

Anyone else ever had to install Jekyll on Windows?

Man, what a displeasure the last four hours were. SSL errors everywhere because Ruby versions have differing SSL certificates for downloading gems or something, having to install the devkit three times, messing with Linux Subsystem and finding out the Ubuntu repos do not have a new enough Ruby version to support what you're doing.

All this to have some fun with GH pages. It's physically exhausting.

HOLY SHIT

FINALLY

AN APP THAT LETS ME USE FIREFOX I STEAD OF SAFARI ON MY FUCKING IPHONE

ITS NOT THAT DAMN HARD APPLE. YOU DID IT FOR THE MAC...

also devrant, plz add browser selection for iOS (yes I already submitted a GH issue)

Recruiters. Recruiters everywhere. I know, I know, F# seems to be the new hot thing now that FP has gained popularity and every bleeding company is looking for one. Well guess what? You got to make a pretty darn good offer for me to jump ship, and no, I’m not going to make much of an effort myself. If you want me, you sell me the job. I’m not going to do the selling here. I’ll come to the interview, do a programming test if I must but I bloody sure won’t tailor you a fucking resume. Everything’s on LinkedIn and here, have a link to my gh acco. That should be enough. No? Well go fuck yourself!

Forked a project of GH, which will remain nameless, and ran into this beauty...

// Not actual code, just respresientative...

{true ? <Component /> : null}

1.Working on a repo's 20 day old version without pulling the changes first
2. Then blaming me to not tell him
3. Ultimately sending me a see screenshot of his code to incorporate in my code ( which he himself didn't write, but asked a coworker to do it)

WTF DUDE. Atleast you could have realised your mistake and not blamed me for it

I just found the current main project of the people who originally wrote the codebase I’m mainly working with. After all these years they still write incoherent spaghetti mess. I need to make a throwaway GH account just to tell them people like them are the reason people hate PHP…

!rant
After 4 - 5 months of learning webD, I am trying to build my first fullstack web application (simple chat one ).

My stack :
FRONTEND:
Vue.js + Materialize

Backend:
Express ( handling routes )
Mongoose/MongoDB ( Database )
Socket.io ( web sockets for real time connection )
JWT

Had dreamt of this 2 months ago where I built a basic front end using html and css, and now porting it to Vue is like a breeze.

Wish me luck and let's hope it doesnot become one of the unfinished projects. ( My university semester exams are coming up , would have to complete this as fast as possible ). I am also learning DSA + STL and aim to learn basic python syntax before holidays so that I can focus my time on ML during them. It's so fucking overloaded that I have my doubts ::((

Why are project/tool webpages so useless...?

I mean, whenever I hear of a new tool/project I google its name. Of course, its dedicated webpage pops up as result #1. And EVERY TIME I find them looking nice, but quite confusing, riddled with all the buzzwords, nice phrases, promises of a better tomorrow,... but I'm yet to find a tool's webpage that explains what's that tool for and how to use it at least half as concisely and clearly as that tool's README.md in its GH/GL repo.

I mean, I can read every single word in the webpage, look at every picture/diagram, every fancy gif and still in absolute majority of cases I have no clue what that tool does.
Then I go to its GH/GL repo, read the first 2 sections of its README.md (takes me what, 2-4 minutes?) and I know all I need to now about the tool.

What's the point of those fancy webpages apart from containing docs and an SEO-tuned link to a README.md...?

Useless waste of storage and computing power if you asked me.

Once I wrote a shell script to solve a problem. Then I thought "now I have to rewrite it in a REAL language". So I did it in Go. But then I got bored and left it to rot in my gh. I picked it up again today and made another rewrite, but now in node. What the actual fuck

I hate python.

Who thought that creating a language that doesn't provide any backwards compatibility whatsoever without a way of managing versions is a good idea?

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It's only August but I already know what I'll be thankful for come Thanksgiving:
1. Our next president.
2. Integration tests.

Trying the look on my phone

For some reason I find reading tech books a repelling activity. I'd rather spend longer hours googling SO issues, GH/GL tickets, reading blogs than reading a well recommended book on the topic.

But then again.. What is the difference between a series of blog posts and a book...? Not much of it. At least I cannot come up with how blog posts would be superior to a structured and many times reviewed book :) Many posts are lame or just skim through the topic. The same holds true with books too. So maybe it's worth getting that 200pages thin book instead..

Prediction: One of the things Microsoft will do to GitHub is to remove gh-pages and make sure you can host stuff on azure, since gh-pages only supports html files, so with azure, you can host a server-sided app.

android development is shitty af, it will make you super zombie computer nerd that sit on his chair for fking several hours just to find the where the fk is null pointer exception is coming from not only this but for all kind of errors,logcat looks like someone just hacking nasa, you know what im the one who is shitty af i would have opt web dev instead of android dev , this retarded studio and emulator takes too much time to just load a simple fking thing & if i make some change in it i've to install that application again ,it's so pathetic and horse shit thing i've ever encountered , kotlin is fun it's actually great language most of the features are so helpful in it,but the google codelabs,it's all documentation , adding dependencies whole concepts are trash imo, why can't we install the dependencies using terminal what's problem in that ,but no they chose the hard way for no fuking reason, i've successfully wasted a year learning this shitty tech stack, hopefully this NY i will choose different stack , will work till ass off .gonna build some cool projects and will eventually try for internships and all. done with android dev, idk how senior dev's are alive in this field

What programming language did you study in high school? In my country they teach us Pascal for what ever reason, me coming from c++ I can t support it

When you accidentally send a screenshot of a chat to the person him/herself. Lot of shitload to get out off .. FYI I blocked the person. Would have to deal with it 1.5 months later when I actually meet her after vacations. I need luck :(

my old game had this flow every time a client places an object:

Client A creates a new generic object, and attaches texture paths (yep, global paths are allowed), and... lua code as strings to it.
Client A sends the entire object list to the server
Server receives it, replaces it's own object list
Server copies the entire object list and sends it to all clients
Client A and Client B both receive the object list and replace their versions.
All clients see that the object contains some code as strings
They compile and store it, and then run every frame. UNSANDBOXED.

any client could make all other ones execute any code and i was proud of my idea!

Why are you paying me to architect your new stack if you're just going to mandate that I use Guice and Jersey "because that's what you're using already"? I'm sorry. You're wrong. Spring Boot is not a "dying technology". I'm not going to build you a servlet from scratch. Get fukt.

All i ever want!

Ok so my thoughts on M$ officially buying github:

Honestly idk, it’s really up to them. I hope they think it really independent because otherwise they could abuse of the power they have over devs. So no added bonuses or free Azure if you develop for uwp or that kind of shit.

But it could also help GH get even better and include more the devs and all that stuff.

Lately, M$ has been becoming a little less evil and maybe they have a little of good will. What I think we need is a motto and clear guidelines for the development of gh. A community focused openness about development.

Anyway, I’m super tired and I should be sleeping, but I’m a dev and I don’t care.

Every time I check my old codes i start insulting my self..... How the fuck was i that stupid..... Still Stupid tho but i m progressing :D

I m learning to code by myself without any instructor :').... I wanna use unreal engine but i forgot how to code with cpp since i m only using C# now.. made winform apps and installing xamarin to learn about cross platform devloppment :)

Fuck companies that want you to build new systems that are a superset of what they already have when they can't even tell you what they have now. Fuck you with your bullshit, nonsensical, self-contradicting, third-assed diagrams--some half-UML, half-clip-art, half-pie-chart drivel. If you're the CTO of a company and you want me to think long and hard about rebuilding your distributed systems, you can think long and hard about expressing what you already have. And NO: a verbal explanation pow-pow WebEx over your DSL connection with your protege that mumbles worse than an Atlantan rapper doesn't count as fucking "knowledge transfer" of your fucking architecture, FOR FUCKS SAKE.

"feel free to choose which ever size pixel you prefer because you get the same great experience on both we don't set aside better features for the larger device"
-Google

how to propose your nerd gf here we go...
"you may look attractive like frontend but you need my support like backend and together we can become full stack developer we can create beautiful projects

Hey!! I have made an app for curbing smartphone addiction, In this app, I am just asking user to set timer for an app, and then my app will remind them to stop using those apps! I am also showing weekly/daily usage statistics. So, what should I name my app?

So umm.. the "Update on new rants" notif is turned off in the settings, but i'm still getting the push notifications. Does this happen to anyone else? Is this worth opening an issue on gh?

It really bugs me out when your co workers start working on a project without telling you. Makes me feel undervalued. I would not complete their sloppy seconds this time for sure

Is there any alternatives to Atlassian's Confluence and Jira?

We used to use GitHub projects and wiki, but "the business" wanted a more formalised process and access controls on kanban boards and backlogs.

We started using Jira and Confluence last month, but Jira have been incredibly slow with a horrible interface also Everytime I create a new issue it feels like I'm wasting a lot of time compared to the time needed to setup an issue on GH and add it to a project board, plus the entire team is used to using markdown which doesn't work great on Jira.

I've looked for some alternative but I wonder what you are using out there!

Being a university student who is about to complete his first year, is being a google certified mobile web specialist worth it?? ( More about my background : I have been into front end developement for around 4 months and this has been my first exposure to " production level coding ". I have been improving my JS skills and am currently learning Vue. I have a fair understanding of backend and am trying to build a full stack app using express, Vue and sockets . I have an interest in algorithms , dsa and machine learning although I an not able to devote my full time on it but hopefully would be able to do it in 2 to 3 months. I also have an interest in Linux and all. ). Please suggest something . Thanks in advance.
PS : I know my interests are very random , but I am just exploring my options and being a freshman , I am confused A lot . So trying to figure out something that will help me in future too

Question for my fellow devs:

Do you feel like you are spending too much time on maintaining ur devops/infrastructure rather than focusing on the actual product?

Do you think your company would be willing to spend a bit of money to outsource scaling problems to someone else and just focus on the product?

Ik we got lots of fancy new CI platforms like Circle CI GH actions etc but like I personally feel like I’m doing certain infrastructure tasks twice when I look at the two different codebases I work on.

I started to contribute to open source again to improve as a dev and to break away from web stuff, on top of that I want to improve my professional imagine with a rebuilt personal website, decent LinkedIn posting and a more curated GH profile (starting from the name, I’ll replace the childish “edgy” name I’m using with actual name + surname).
The only issue I have is that on my current GH profile there are a couple of issue on random OSS projects which I offered to fix but then I’ve not maintained the promise for mental health or work issues which deprived me of any willpower towards evening programming. Do you think it’s better for me to create a new profile to get rid of these or I can still use my current profile without risking significant reputation damage?

when you see someone declare a variable in java as int new 😄

Multiple projects on fire. WHY, GOD, WHY?

Told my friends about this awesome app. It used to be my safe place earlier, but oh well... Kinda happy and sad about it at the same time. Hope they don't recognize my handle 😅

I decided to use Docker Compose on a tiny project that essentially consists of an API and a Caddy server that serves static files and proxies to the API, all of this running on an EC2 t1-nano. I made this admittedly odd choice because I wanted to learn Compose and simultaneously forego figuring out why the node-gyp bindings for sqlite3 refuse to build on EC2 even though it builds just fine on my machine.

I am storing secrets in .env which is committed into the private GH repo. Just now I came across a rant that described the same security practice and it sounded pretty bad from an outside perspective so I decided to research alternatives.

Apparently professional methods for storing secrets generally have higher system requirements than a t1-nano. I'm not looking for a complex service orchestration system, I'm not trying to run an enterprise on this poor little cloud-based raspberry pi. I just want to move my secrets out of the Git repo,

Any tips?

how can i change my stupid username please ?

When all the discussion about a PR took place somewhere else so anyone looking at GitHub thinks they just blatantly disregarded GH etiquette

when your daily machine is a 150$ chromebook with a celeron running ubuntu....terminal and vim, you are my friends....and the only things I can use without freezing the machine 😥

You know you're a programmer when the hub means two different places to you ;)

F*CK C++

I truly believe that a back end needs to know about front end as much as a front end needs to know about back end.
And a more serious belief is that project managers / owners need to know about both. Thank you.

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Inheriting an ejected react-native expo app is cancer.

Im working as a software testing engineer with 2years of experience, I want to change my domain...I have some options infront of me..like Data Science, SAP HANA, Android app development, Full stack developer..I'm at intermediate level in java programming...please guide me to pick one from them

String good =
"I'll never give up type systems!!"
+ " Do you hear me?!"
+ " Never!";

bad =
"Can't believe it made it all the way into prod."
% NaN + 3 / '11'

how do I upload files on github in an existing repo with github api, I mean I'm able to create a repo using github api but I don't know how do I upload file via gh api?