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So today I got really triggered when i hear this guy say that coding is cancer. I stand up and instantly the first thing going through my mind is that it's the battle of the nerds. He says he tried ALL of the programing languages out there and they were shit. I asked if he tried C# and he still says coding is cancer even though he has never even heard of any C# syntax. I asked if he used Batch as a started language and he still says it. So I just decided to roast him by saying "did you put .bat at the end of the file when you were saving? Oh wait never mind, I forgot your lazy ass doesn't have the intelligence to understand how to save"
Surprisingly everyone was silent and most likely didn't understand what I had said. So I just left wondering if he even bothered to get a guide on syntax for any of the languages he would have liked.5
The Indian state of Kerala uses Linux(Edubuntu) in all the schools. This incident happened back in 2010. I was not that proficient in Linux but I liked it for some reasons.
So one day, one of my IT teachers was handed the responsibility to edit a video. Being the School Student IT Convenor, he asked for my help. I'm no Video Editor but this thing was so easy that Openshot was enough.
While I was at it, he said: "Why does the govt. want us to use such unprofessional stuff? If it was Windows we could do everything very easily. Who is ever gonna use Linux in a professional environment? The govt. is spoiling the children by urging them to use Linux, Free Software and Open Source."
I couldn't argue that day. But today I so wish I could go back and roast him!4
It's happening... 😂😂😂
Wish me luck.. or roast me
Well it's gonna be dual boot so it's not permanent :P28
For a project day we had to write a game of our choice in Java.
"You should make this game using the JSwing library and make each component a JComponent"
Later I learned you can simply use a Bitmap as a canvas.
NEVER. EVER. BASE. YOUR. GAME. ON. SWING.
It inefficient to the top of my taskmanager. I had to wrap everything with something like a virtual playground where I had to manage everything myself to not roast my cpu.
I had alot more fun debugging hundred lines of C code with print statements than writing that shit2
So Im making my best friend (which is a girl) a website. I'm not a pro at it so please don't roast me. I am self taught and still learning. A few opinion and ideas would hurt ? K:32
I tried writing this rant before, but I was (and still am) in too good of a mood so it was lengthy, meandering, and over-specific. so I'll summarize(ish).
* working weekends
* incompetence and/or screwy integrations
summary of the summary:
* I can't fix someone else's mess if you don't talk to me!
Summary^3: #TODO: learn telepathy
Bossman at work signed up a very lucrative client by promising them something he couldn't deliver because he misunderstood and miscommunicated scope -- anti-fraud, if you've been following my rants.
Their signup (all four...) are screwy and cause issues and nobody knows why. I didn't write the code, have barely even glanced through it, and it uses a third-party (Clover) that's rather screwy.
Bossman has been asking me to do various things concerning the merchant, but has never been around to provide specifics, so I'm left to guess. I've done my best, but due to the aforementioned screwiness, I really have no idea what's going on. I just sort of muddled my way through.
Bossman also asked me, super late on Friday night (after 8:30pm), to rename one of the merchants because there are two with the same name (with different Clover creds, etc.) and that's just confusing. I didn't see the message because late and tired, and he didn't follow up or text/call me until two days later (today, Sunday). I also thought these were strictly for diagnosing and were de-listed. I had no idea the merchant was live and people were actually purchasing things for it. Had I known this I would have freaked out and demanded specifics on Thursday/Friday because wtf? debugging in production? with broken merchants? selling things for real money? scary bad? hello?
Anyway, I didn't see his message until he texted me about it at like 5pm today while I was about 2 hours from my computer. He's understandably frustrated, and I totally don't blame him, but fuck, miscommunication is a serious problem in this company, and that's amazing because it's so freaking small.
But the short version is that I'm likely going to get blamed for all this, Clover screwiness included. Bossman and I set up a call for 10am tomorrow and I'm positive he's going to try pinning it on me. Totally not going to let him, but his social is lv16+ while mine's like. 2 or 3. 😕 I'll see how it goes.
Really though, I should read @rutee07's book and just roast these fuckers.3
let's try something...
Roast thread, please tag and insult your fellow devRanter in this comment section. Get creative in finding swearwords. Too many ++ bombs, poor code quality or you're just secretly in love with some other Ranter and hate it.25
My react component is now over 1000 lines long and contains 28 state values. Go ahead and roast me. I deserve it.7
When Microsoft shuttered Windows XP, my mom's old laptop became a virus-prone, sluggish machine. She let me have it, soon after which I decided to install Ubuntu on it. One thing I should note about this laptop is that the battery could not hold a charge. The power cord was the laptop's life support, and I made sure to place the power brick on a flat surface.
One day, a new version of Ubuntu was released. I decided to perform a dist-upgrade. Because this laptop was on the older side, the ventilation left a lot to be desired by today's standards. Rather than roast my crotch, I placed my computer on the table and the power brick on a swivel chair next to me.
I was working on an assignment for a class when I saw movement in my peripheral vision. I turned and watched in horror as my power brick fell off the chair, pulling the charging cord out of the laptop and turning off the laptop... MID-UPGRADE!
Moral of the story, learn to navigate a computer via a text interface if you haven't already. It may save your ass someday. It saved mine.2
If I were cooking like I maintain my dev projects, I'd have a roast in the fridge, a frittata thats only missing the eggs, eight different pots of uncooked soup around the kitchen and the ingredients for a pudding in the cupboard. But I'd be eating pasta with a ready-made soup every day, because its finished.
NoSQL makes a little bit of sense in a chaotic way but six years of SQL defaults my data structure visualization to the traditional column/row shitness. I can definitely see its use but as my tasks go deeper into it and add to that the completely foreign data of a new project with a new stack, I feel a little less confident about my employment status.
If I wanted to search some information in the database and get the filename of the document, my mind quickly wanders off to:
Value = <filename>
Value = <additional information>
So I would code based on that structure. I'd still get the values I want but then I would find out that it's inefficient because in reality:
Value = <additional information>
But in this case, the column name itself is the filename so you'll see:
Value = <additional information>
Value = <additional information>
And in my current task's case, the filename can either be some human-readable text with no file extensions or some gibberish shit that when encoded turns into docname.txt, etc.
That confused me for a long time because I had mistaken the human-readable stuff as the column because it looks like a column name (for example, "NOTES"). Do you get what I mean? I'm just rambling here because my other colleague had experience with NoSQL before. My boss had to explain the data structure to me knowing I was confused. While I think that's fair and it's unreasonable for me to expect myself to know everything about this project or a technology I didn't write in my resume, it makes me feel stupid like I'm not even passing my own standards now. I'm not stubbornly figuring things out on my own, by the way, which is why I asked my boss in the first place. I always ask for clarifications. It's just this kind of reflex thing with SQL.
Whatever. This is not the rant I promised. I just want to ramble on and get over it before I roast other people for their own shortcomings.1
I was making coffee this morning when one of my managers walked up and asked me if I could make a cup for him too.
I was like sure, anything to make you happy. (Maybe you'll lessen the amount of work I have to do today 😀)
I finished making both the cups of coffee and the brought his over to his desk. He drank some and then almost spit it out. He complained about how the coffee was not dark roast it was medium roast, and he could tell the difference and I should have known that.
I was like "well if you're going to complain about how I make your coffee go make your fucking own". (I didn't say that out loud though, I probably would have been fired!)9
I see many people try to build automated insults using ML and reddit roast me, is it possible to build an automated compliment bot ?5
I don’t give a fuck about crypto currency, bitcoin and all the shit. I don’t even want to know how it works.
I’m an arrogant or dumb ??
My class team picks me for a competition.
My team tells me to do everything and doesn't give me an outline of what they want for the code or design.
They have 7 members. + me, 8.
I have to design and code the whole app on android.
Furthermore it was my first time with library stuff.
I had to develop from 10pm to 6 am with short rests in between. Almost no sleep.
It's impossible sht. I continue with it.
When it was time for school, I just went to school as per usual.
When it was the interview someone just had to roast the judges.
Our idea was very sophisticated; was to help track down elderly or child with a gps tracker and the app.
Didnt got in the qualifiers because of the leader being an asshole to the interviewers.
Hey devs. See you've got a minute dev in this bluge world of developers. My characteristic is roasting all but just because I am roasted I chose to roast y'all. So, how's life?2
I need to begin with a project ASAP.
I wanna make something. I don't know what but I want to.
My skills: Python, Java, PHP (kick my ass on this), Minimal Frontend, Django, C++
All the skills are on the beginner and intermediate stages.
In college right now
Haven't done a single project
Need serious suggestions on how to begin to make myself a good CV and get satisfaction by making something..
Roast me. But do throw some light.
Thanks thanks thanks a lot ❤️❤️❤️❤️3
Do you guys pronounce the database query language as 'S.Q.L.' or 'See-quel'
Personally hearing the latter makes me want to punch the person saying it right in the throat.
Please forgive the pea-roast, didn't check to see if this had been previously asked.14
I made a lazy handwritten static site that's kind of broken, but I'm super proud of its quirkiness. Okay: roast me:
Today, my boss comes up to me to tell me that the CR he had me set up was not created by the release manager because there wasn't a QA test ticket or DBA review ticket. Look, if you're gonna shoot shit down without any bullets loaded, at least have the safety off because you had 3 hours on Friday to tell me that before leaving it to Monday morning when my head is hotter than the roast I'm sippin' on.
You nut butter, contrary to pizza devs. This plus chocolate and fresh medium roast, plus Yerba mate is what can help me when working.2
Ricing newly installed Mate Desktop
In need of wallpapers (Anime/Illustration)
In need of a motivational quote too (can be sarcastic)
People who are going to roast me in the comments I know its cringe worthy and googleable. Cloning multiple repos and downloading a lot of data so please help me out5
Hey Arch people! Wanna help a newbie get started? I'm very comfortable with sysadmin and are currently using Ubuntu with XMonad for DE.
I'd like to 'build' my own, super minimal system. It should preferably have gtk theming with XMonad as de. I've been looking at suckless and are currently wonder what I actually need to prepare/know in order for networking, VSCode(or learn vim), QT and docker to run on the system. It has a Nvidia graphics card and I'd like to use it for ML too.
Dont worry, I'm also going through the Arch page and are looking for answers to my questions & thoughts.. I just know I haven't thought of everything yet, probably not even all the basics.
Oh and please roast me for my ignorance, as long as you tell me something useful 😝6