Make it like facebook but better.

The amazing adventure of IE

- Wife logs onto uni website Saturday at 11pm to drop an elective, drop deadline is Monday
- Goes to course list and chooses course to drop
- "Course modification is available Monday-Saturday from 6am to 10pm"

😑 are you kidding me..

Like 😡😠 websites don't have business hours! Servers don't need nights or weekends off!! It's ridiculous to think that someone had to code this block for these hours, more effort than just leaving it always available.

One of the best developer jokes....

Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck

Well.. I'm a front end developer and this quote is my favourite.

"A user interface is like a joke. If you have to explain it, it's not that good. "

I have my best moments but the first time I felt badass about computers was when I was at kindergarten.

There was one computer with one cool game with skateboard. I wanted to play but the other kids didn’t let me.

I thought that if it look like I fix the computer they will let me. I took me month or little more but I made shutdown bat(I didn’t really understood fully) and I added it to the game shortcut from usb.

One of the other kids started the game and the computer turned itself off. Hi tried a few times and then I offered to fix it, I created new shortcut replacing the “hacked” one and the game ran.

From that moment the computer and the game were always free for me.

What bug?

Got a Email response from TJ. Best day of my life 😀

The only reason I use Linux is because I can't get a mac.

Seriously, look at this guy’s bloody phone. He’s not letting go of it, it’s been like this for ages. He’s got missing pieces of glass above the lcd, there are cracks all over, sellotape all over. At some point you gotta realise it’s affecting the user experience.

If you don’t want to get a new phone, at least have the screen replaced!!

When you walk into class and realize you are the only female yet again

I saw a post about headphones that reminded me.

Last week I was trying to find out why my code wasn't working. At about an hr in my wife asks me "honey, why do you have headphones on but they aren't plugged into anything?"

I looked at her partially spaced and thought to myself "I have headphones on?!?!"

Lol I tend to do this a lot.

Not sure if happy or sad

I'm having a crazy client month.

Saw this on Facebook and couldn't help but share here! 😂

A young woman submitted the tech support message below (about her relationship to her husband) presumably did it as a joke…
The query:

Dear Tech Support,

’Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slowdown in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as: Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as: NBA 5.0, NFL 3.0 and Golf Clubs 4.1.

Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and House cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
What can I do?

Signed,
Desperate

The response (that came weeks later out of the blue):

Dear Desperate,

“First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Please enter command: I thought you loved me.html and try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.

However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1. Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Farting and Snoring Loudly Beta.

Whatever you do, DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)
In addition, please, do not attempt to re-install the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend: Cooking 3.0.Good Luck!’

Good Luck!

Android Studio just converted my java file to another language.
Such an amazing IDE ❤️

Hello World! 👋
A newbie to DevRant..

I am Done! I am extremely burnt out and unhappy with my work. I have been doing this professionally for over 5 years now and much longer than that unprofessionally.
This new company I joined finally gave me the salary I always dreamt of but now I am extremely unhappy and depressed and anxious all the time. And I don't like the work I am doing. I don't like the team. I hate being isolated at home for over 2 years, working from home. I had a mental breakdown in the middle of the meeting the other day. And after that, I said. that's it. I am done. So, I gave the resignation letter. I don't know what I am gonna do. But I sure as hell can't do this shit any longer. But now, the fucking hr is making it even more difficult for me by not letting me leave without serving the notice period. I told her I am on fucking medication and I am having severe mental health issues. Now, she wants to see the medical certificate. Or I have to pay two months' salary. WTF? If I had that kind of money lying around, I wouldn't have slaved myself away at your shitty company, would I?
I went to my psychiatrist whom I have been seeing consulting for the last couple of years now. I asked for a medical certificate and he thinks it'll hamper my future career. So, he said I should get a certificate from a general physician. So, that's the world we live in then? You can't even speak the truth? And the way HR is behaving over the mail makes me feel like a total slave. I mean I am not at all fit for work these days, and it feels like, if she had her way, she would tie me down to a chair and ask me to push out code. what the fucking fuck. This is some fucked up industry and I think I am finally done with software development. But now, I don't have any idea what I am gonna do with my life or how am I gonna earn money. I am so burnt out and anxious that even the thought of working again gives me panic attacks. even working from home. What the fuck do I do?

Thought this was funny

Full HD 27' monitor 😍😍😍 when you can divide your screen into two halves easily and there's no need to do Alt+tab

IOS 11 Beta 2 can play gifs in the default Photos app!!!

Applied to a Jr. Dev job and was hired as a Digital Marketer — I can deal with this, I’m AdWords & Analytics certified. What I can’t abide is that I spent the last year working my ass off learning to code and the person next to me with the Jr. Dev position only uses DIVI and has zero inclination to study, learn or write basic HTML & CSS—much less PHP. I’m not an expert by any means but I love programming, I love the problem solving, the challenges and the culture of it all. So far, and these are only two examples, I’ve shown him how to use the target attribute to open a page as a new tab, and how to register a nav in the functions.php file to create a menu but he is unwilling to even attempt it. Rather, he told me that I was too technical and that no one would be using code in this day and age.

For the record, I think DIVI is a cool platform, it’s clear that my boss knows nothing about code to be fair and I love my job— this is my only issue so far😂 I just needed to rant.

For anyone wondering "rm -rf /" on a jailbroken iOS 12 deletes many of the system apps and services but device is still kind of usable without too many crashes, still managed to set boot nonce and restore (thank god).

So much truth

Elon Musk

Genius ??

Or

Sci-fi movie dreaming weirdo with money to burn and a cult following????

The personal trainers in the fitness that I go to are graduated programmers(.net, javascript, sql...).
During rest I can talk about something I love to people who understand me, guess I am lucky. 🍀

I'm getting convinced that some areas are not teachable. You have to learn it by yourself. Databases (sql), for instance, the teacher never manages to get the class attention. Even I that consider myself a very interested guy can't handle 2 hours of his explanations. I tried to think in a better way he could teach the content but don't really think there is one ..Do you guys faced issues like that in school?

At school I was excited when our teacher said he will teach us programming with VS.
I was expecting C# to show my skills but the he showed us a big book about Visual Basic with VS Express 2010.
I was literally dying.

My manager's boss just commited on a delivery date a month from now. We dont know what is to be delivered, nor does the client. We are supposed to work on a platform that we know nothing about. And of course the catchphrase is : yeah just use big data and spark. I'm dying...

I am good to the programs I use.
I give the all the needed ram.
Except Android Studio, I don’t have a fucking server.

Now my facebook messenger app does it's updates inside the app without my consent to install an apk.
I'm scared

Who else hates tutorials.
They are made with so much text and outdated code that it’s better to write the thing needed by yourself and stack overflow.🤔

Regarding the Area 51 news. These guys are really stupid. They’ll deservedly got shot soon as they come close enough to the fence, and even if they get over, then what??

Anyone who know anything, knows that you need to spawn a jet pack, get to the second hanger ASAP, and jump in the Rhino. They can’t touch you after that, even with 5 stars!!

!rant
Found out about JetBrains student program and asp.net unix support and now I am the happiest person on earth!😊🙂😋

Thank you devrant for the awesome stickers i put one on my laptop and one on my on my desktop the last one i may put on my car.

My password manager!!
I use passwords I can never remember, stay logged in, next time I need to log_in I use the passqord forgotten button, reset it with my e-mail or better phone

Android flow I’ve found(fixed in android 8, working on 7.1.1):
To make app uninstallable by the normal user make the app device administrator, add “android.permission.SYSTEM_ALERT_WINDOW” to the manifest and make sure it’s not granted by the user.
Now when you try to uninstall the app, it tells you to disable it from device administrators but the device administrator disable dialog is System Window handled by the app itself and if the app has this permission but not granted, settings will crash with SecurityException leaving the app untouched.

Who needs windows update?

Started learning Python from Java, C#, Objective-C, Swift.
It’s like Rocket Engineer who have to build a car. It’s easy but you have to learn almost everything from the beginning.

The IT policy at my company is down right ridiculous. You’re required admin rights to fucking move desktop shortcuts to the trash, all chrome extensions and almost anything you download from the internet is a ‘virus’, good luck getting driver support for external devices.

Writing my code, go to run it and boom its not working. I pull up stack over flow to get some insight. At this point i was working on my code for countless hours and became a bit annoyed so i decided to copy what someone wrote on stack over flow delete my code where i thought it was flawed. I run it and Blam bugged the hell outa my code. So i undo go back to my original. Turn to a friend and ask what do you thinks going wrong. He resets my browser and there it goes it works. I just kind of gave him a blank stare and thought to myself Im a dumbass!

I heard Google has prepared an AI for solving competitive programming questions by training models based on problems and solutions from GitHub.
*devil smile*...on my way to flood GitHub with wrong solutions. Ciao!

The dark them feels good on the eyes. Thank you devrant.

Google suggested me some article about how to preorder iPhone 8 and 8 plus.
To all devs who want to know my trick:
just buy second hand iPhone 7 or 7 plus and say it’s iPhone 8.

This is written by an iPhone 7 plus user and I suggest you if you want good look and functionality - buy OnePlus 5.

The number of ‘Junior FRONT-end’ positions that list Node.js as a requirement.

**Sees a different error after hours of debugging the previous one**

ME (crying inside) - What type of sorcery is this?

My wife says to me we need a new car..

Im sitting here trying to decide what I need more a car or a new computer.

Decisions, decision..

Every bloody time I respond to a comment, devRant asks me to add my 2 cents. I only have pence here, and there is not fucking coin slot!!!! 😡

I tried the lighting port, it doesn’t fit.

Is anyone else experiencing this pay wall?

When it’s 3am and you are working on an exception for more than 2 hours and have optimized your whole code just to be sure and remember you are writing swift not java: some ints have low max value like UInt8.

Let’s make statistics about from where are the most people out here.
boolean added = false
for (Comment comment: rant.comments) {
if (comment.text.contains(yourHomeland)){
comment.upvote();
added = true;
break;
}
}
if (!added){
rant.writeComment(myHomeland);
}

It is really frustrating when you have deadlines to meet,and need to fix issues with the tools instead of actively produce something. A whole day lost.

Some good things are just used by bad people 😞

For all the cheap-ass sys admins:
I wouldn’t pay 100$ a year to apple just to have push notifications when my server fucks up or an user fill my support form but I want to know that in real time but I have iPhone(forget about FCM).

So I downloaded pushbullet to my phone and integrated its API in my server and when something important happen I get completely free notification which (thanks to url schemes in ios) redirect me to my server administration app.

Note: I used xamarin for my management app to be ready for the moment when I switch back to android.

@HampusMa
What does that mean?

Noticed it while on another rant but didn’t want to hijack the topic. I’m genuinely curious.

Life as i know it

Basically...

Fucking Browser autocorrect!

You type the same address a hundred times, every time hoping it’ll guess the address after the first.... second..... third.... character. No, it shows you a similarly named site that you went on months ago. End up having to type most of the domain name before it catches it.

Then, one day, you hastily mis-spell the address and press enter, now autocorrect keeps fucking directing you to there!!

Fellow females! Hollaback!!

I started studying programming last year, currently learning c# and c++ at college (even though I'm a 29 years old electrical engineer.. long story...) any advice on how to start looking for internships and jobs? I feel very lost on how to proceed to gain experience and feel that many of my colleagues have the same issue. Thanks

Went from notepad++(and it’s mac equivalent Brackets) to Dreamweaver CC and VS Code.
Feels good man!

idk why, but why focus so much on internal stuff that never will be public...this is also my favorite quote

You know you hit rock bottom when can only comunicate with a chat bot.

So I joined this digital agency where they are working on this ad-tech product and right from day one, I was given a task to implement a new feature on the product. No knowledge transfer. No onboarding process. So, I had given estimation about the task and apparently it took longer than expected. But what were they expecting. Anyways, my manager asked me to have a KT with the only senior guy that has been working there for last couple of years. And man, since the KT started, it's been hell for me. The guy is such an asshole and won't even give me a basic walkthrough of the system. He only took one call and that ended within 30 minutes. On top of that he went ahead and told the product manager that I am not keeping up and am not ready. And my product manager apparently wants me to take his place within a month. It's been only two months since I joined. I have already pushed two major features, tried to understand the system architecture, codebase and everything on my own. On top of that, I got yelled at by that senior dev in a meeting about a PR. I was quite confident guy when I joined and now I am anxious everyday at work and i am scared that they'll let me go because I won't be able to meet their unrealistic expectations. I also can't stand this senior dev and he can't stand me which makes me really demotivated to work. I have anxiety issues and now I am thinking if I stay, I am gonna mess up big time and they'll fire me or worse. I might break something in production because I didn't have proper onboarding.

Working on FCM today and actually this is not rant. 😃 🎉
Google documented everything correctly and everything is understandable.

Opened up my laptop to install faster wifi card with macOS support and it turns out that I have m.2 type connection ready for ssd.

These fucking idiots in Toshiba have never said anywhere in this laptop’s specs that it supports m.2.

I bought 128gb ssd and installed it.
Fast af boie and no problems booting from it.

Ok, OnePlus nice fucking job!
I receive all of my notifications even during night and I lose around 4% per night - this is almost iPhone level!

Ported proprietary Chinese dll for specific device hid control and my windows program around it to macOS using swift.
Yeah that's pretty much how I feel.

Switched to LG G5 from iPhone 7 Plus.

Lg's screen has burn in and took me about 10 hours to completely fuck it up, restore it, flash crDroid(Lineage os based, the only custom rom working fine so far) and workaround the faulty wifi chip giving null mac address by faking it.

Still love my new(old) phone more than the iPhone.

Made a root only app: enable/disable GPS, mobile data, airplane mode and etc. work on not rooted device(yes all these functions work too).

How: Desktop app which downloads cross-platform ADB drivers, unzips them, executes a few commands, deletes the drivers and voala.
P.S: I use local ADB TCP connection(yeah I ported a part of the drivers for java android) and write_secure_settings granted with 'pm grant'.
And everything is user-friendly with screenshots explaining how to enable ADB and how to click a 2 buttons.

When something worked perfectly yesterday and now it’s just fucked up without touching anything:
Cause today
That was yesterday
Yesterday is over
It's a different day
(Love The Way You Lie - Eminem)

A Yahtzee game.

In fewer lines than my first try in 2010.

Fyi... It was like only 15 thousands line with if else statements .... Nuthin much.

So, I got hired as an independent contractor and the first thing they do is put me on a trial period which will be paid if I am able to complete the tasks. But, they said they'll pay me if I complete the tasks provided each day and not hourly. which is fine except the tasks for one day is impossible to complete in a day. Now, I am not sure if it is a big prank or they don't know how much time it takes to implement something like that. Or are they willingly trying to fail me to see my limits? because as far as I can tell, the tasks are impossible to complete in a day and I don't know what am I gonna report in the next meeting. I don't have much experience being in these kind of situation. So, what should I do? should I tell them that it's gonna take more time? are they expecting me to tell them that or should I just shut up and try my best to finish it in a day? is this fairly common?

Out of curiosity, how many years of PROFESSIONAL experience do people have on here. I’m assuming it’s quite diverse but skewed towards those at junior to mid-level for some reason. Just put a number down. I’ll start.

0

Have anyone in Norway/Scandinavia ordered a devduck/apparel from the swag store and can tell me how long it did take? Want to order one, but not until at the start of next year.

Just after feature launch, major bug on production and now I am getting yelled at by my lead as the issue happens to be with the PR i was responsible for reviewing yesterday. Somehow a logic error got past my review. But considering how large the project is it wasn't possible for me to test out every possible scenario myself. They should have had QA handle that. Also, that was my first code review. I can't understand why my boss has such unrealistic expectations. Bugs are expected at this stage. I feel like he just puts too much pressure on me for no other ther reason other than to just trigger my imposter syndrome. That way, I feel like a bad developer even though I am working my ass off. And he gets to avoid giving me a raise. Cant believe I rejected multiple offers to stay at this company. I don't even know why am I still working for this company anymore.

Has anyone tried kivy for android on a mac using the newest android sdk and ndk?

If the answer is no, god bless you and your unhurt soul.

As a senior developer with a couple of years under the belt, do you think having an active Instagram, YouTube and Facebook account is necessary? Does It help professionally at all? or am I just wasting time that I can use elsewhere?
I am thinking about launching my own SaaS in the future. But as a developer, does social media presence impact in any significant way in your professional life?

I am kinda getting addicted to posting setup videos and reels on Instagram. I don't have an end goal in mind. I just find it a way to express myself. But sometimes even I get cringe seeing my own posts. I was thinking about ditching IG and Facebook and twitter and go back to writing blog posts or something.

!dev && dev_workflow

Hey guys, what are your favorite truly wireless headphones?

For context:
- my OSes: Android (phone), MacOS (laptop), iOS (tablet).

- my getting in love with wireless audio story: I have been using some Chinese ones off AliExpress just to test out the truly wireless waters, their sound quality and pairing experience especially on Android is pretty shit but the ability to forget that you have headphones in your ears and just listen to music obstruction-free is 🔥 but they are now dying so I am looking for a replacement.

So you know those movies where the girl fells in love with the bad gay(kidnapper, thief...) and she doesn’t want to be saved.

Same relationship with me and JavaFX.

I was discussing with fellow students at college level about which technology to focus for web dev. Angular, React or Vue.Js. Would like to know external opinions about that :) any advices?

A question for people who are active on the open source community or anyone who succeeds in crwating some small personal coding projects.
How do you do it?
Do you have any advice on how to be more efficient when working on personal projects?
Each time I get an idea i try to start it but just give up or get discouraged by some related setups.

Also how do you find interesting existing projects to contribute to?

Please help. I wanna do more but never do anything. Am I alone in this situation?? I dont wanna get stuck in this loop anymore.

!rant

Rational ClearCase.

So, I have joined this new company where I used to work few years back. Something happened before I rejoined, so no one is working there now except me. It's web agency run by my boss and I am the only employee working on over 7 projects including front end, back end, mobile, devops, and some marketing also.

Now, I got offers from couple of other series a funded startups who are willing to pay me 30% more salary. I know I will have less responsibility and more work life balance. But I hate the politics in those companies.

My current company is making good revenue but my boss isn't giving me the salary I am expecting.

He said it will take few more months to give me the salary I demanded.

I also want to build my own company and provide services someday. That's why I thought it'll be better to stick with the company so that I cam learn other aspects of the business.

So. If the company is making say over 200k usd a year and its paying me around 23k usd per year, isn't this kinda low salary for my experience, skills and value I bring?

How should I go about asking a raise?

Also, I don't wanna move to another big tech company. I hate coding questions in the interview as its been years I have prepared for a proper tech interview.

Also, how secure do you think my job is? Is there any future working here? Will I ever be able to reach a salary comparable to big tech companies?
Is it a good place be in right now? (i jave over 5 years of experience)

True story ))))))))))))

The sticker would look amazing on my laptop, too bad i'm not going to get one soon 🙁🙁

Do a workout/run/walk outside for an hour, before starting to learn something.

I'm using Fedora 25/ pre-release, and It's rock solid except for wifi hotspot and I don't need it.

Now my school gave me a Windows 10 pro key, and I'm hesitant.
Should I install it ?
Will I need it ?

College Major: Civil Engineering
Minor: Web development(Frontend)

I need a scraper, or a f$$$in api

Anybody using Jetbrains PyCharm on Linux ?