Client : pls put the disclaimer that the site uses cookies.
Me: but we don't use cookies this is a static page
Client: Still, the pop up makes the site look more professional, kindly add the feature asap
Me: :/

Worst Hackathon ? When you have coded so hard during 48 hours to have a functional prototype and the winners get trophee with a static PowerPoint, full of bullshit buzzwords...

Consultant: "you should deploy a website. Use wordpress and have a draft ready in a few days. It's easy."

Me: "It's a static website, a one-pager even. I think we would be better served with something light-weight without a database."

Consultant: "99% of the websites in the entire internet are powered by wordpress. It's state of the art, you should use it"

Me: 😢 "Nooo, it needs mainentance and stuff. Look, XY is much simpler. You can even version the static site with git"

Consultant: 😤

We ended up with wordpress for our static website now. I am so proud. I absolutely love wordpress. It is amazing. Now my static one-pager can have plugins, multiple users, security issues and all that. The future is now!

Let's build an Android app... For a static Website.

Today I saw this in our code base:
private static final int THREE = 3;

To do this:
rating += THREE;

I laughed, and cried a little.

Hehe, stumbled upon an oldie :-)

struct ComputerContractor
{
double salary;
long lunches;
float jobs;
char unstable;
void work;
int hiring_him_again;
const pain_in_the_arse;
unsigned agreement;
short fuse;
volatile personality;
static progress;
};
/* and there are no unions in sight */

My first self written framework 😅

Damn that was a pile of ****, I still write my own stuff (frameworks etc) but I've learned a lot and those are way better compared to that first one.

Everything was static, loads of defines (way too fucking many) and so on.

Dus.....

Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck

My biggest tip to new developers? Embrace your ignorance, don't be embarrassed by it. Let it inspire you to learn as much as you can, let it humble you into asking questions when you're stuck, let it prepare you to change within an industry that is anything but static. Admitting you don't know something isn't a weakness, it's an opportunity 😃

My boss has never programmed before. Recently, he decided that I should print out all the code for an admittedly rather small project (10k lines of Java code, 200 pages printed out), and then have me explain every line to him.

Luckily, he didn't get past 'public static void main', especially since I hadn't even bothered to print out more than that!

"I made your static HTML pages into a dynamic site! Now just include <%Header%> instead of copy pasting that nav into every page!"

...1 week later...

"You made our website all crazy. None of the pages have headers in the source code but it still shows up by some kind of witchcraft. Put it back."

static void TryOut<T>(T newStuff)
{
try
{
self.Learn(newStuff);
}
catch (NotUnderstandingException)
{
// At some point, it will work, just call it again
TryOut(newStuff);
}
}

/*
Pickup line by a dev-

Hey girl,
I always thought `love` was a static class till you made an instance of it!

copied
*/

When you accidentaly build up so much static electricity that you zap your laptop and the screen goes black. 😅

As a Java developer, reasons to kill other programmers:

- static mutable variables
- WRITING to static mutable variables
- API call with Framework X didn't work. Add Framework Y along with X and try that. Wrap X in try/catch statement. Catch block fires framework Y.
- six, seven, ten levels of nested code. Zero thought put in organization
- 6K LOC Java files
- spring (singleton? Maybe) object assigning values in static mutable (see pt.1)
- a couple of unit tests in code base that no longer work. Zero unit tests in new code
- unit testing disabled in CI pipeline
- empty catch blocks
- pass mutable data between threads. Modify in various places concurrently.

import java.util.Exception;
try {
public class A {
public static void main(String args[]) {
new Exception();
}
}
}
catch(Exception e) {
System.out.println("Got you BITCH");
}

The idea was simple. Create a div.
Add two 50% div's inside. Float them. Add clearfix to parent.

Everything was fine.

Noticed that one of the childs had a height bigger than the other. But due to an adaptive design, setting static heights did not work.

Simple fix. Add a height to parent div and set overflow-y to hidden.

It didn't work.

Tried using the legendary !Important (a.k.a. not important but important.) Didn't work. Set position to relative, set static height. Set the childs to absolute position with height 100%. Problem solved.

No. It. Didn't. Fucking. Work.

Tried every possible css combination could could fucking think off.

After 15 minutes (8 hours in dev-stress mode) realized the clearfix changed the div DISPLAY TO FUCKING TABLE. A TABLE. FUCKING TABLES CANT HAVE FUCKING HEIGHTS FUCK.

Anyway. 6 years after my first clearfix. I learnt something new about the code that saves my life every project.

/*
* Name
*/
private static final String NAME = "name";

No shit Sherlock...

public class HelloDevRant
{
public static void main(String[] args)
{
//Commenting for reasons! ;)
System.out.print("Hello dear devRant community!\nI am new here!\nNice to meet you.");
}
}

// I can't be the only one...

public static void p(String inpt) {
System.out.println(inpt);
}
...

p("That much typing is unjustified.");

The moment when the legacy system programmer told you they program object oriented, and all you see is a class with hundreds of static methods. and 2 protected static methods

Python: I hate the way it uses True/False over true/false

Java: Static. Just fuck static. oh and System.out.println(), why the fuck did they make the basic print function so long to write.

C#: I despise the way the curly braces get automatically put under the function declaration rather than beside it since it's a language style thing.

C: the inability to declare vars in altho declaration of a forloop. Although I think C11 let's you do this.

Javascript: Fucking prototypes.

Coldfusion: it runs like an elephant. Slow and heavy.

Go: The way the compiler won't let you have unused variables/imports. Pain in the ass for testing.

On category theory...

For all you meme lovers

namespace Improvise {
static class Adapt {
int Overcome;
}
}

Improvise.Adapt.Overcome

Why would anyone declare a private static function ???? Like WTF????

Going through code left by a senior developer who quit.. Dated 2015..

public static T IfThenElse<T>(bool isTrue, T ifYes, T ifNo)
{
if(isTrue) { return ifNo ; }
else if(!isTrue) { return ifNo ;}
Debugger.Break();
throw new Exception("") ;
}
.....
There was a unit test for it well
....
............. Wow, just wow

Static.
One fucking static and its all over

Found this gem in some old piece of code:

public static void printStackTrace(Exception e){
e.printStackTrace();
}

condition == true

is for boys,

public static boolean isTrue(boolean condition) {
try {
return new Boolean(condition).equals(Boolean.parseBoolean(new String(Boolean.toString((boolean) Boolean.class.getField(String.valueOf(true != false).toUpperCase()).get(null)).toString().toCharArray())));
} catch(Throwable t) {
return condition;
}
}

is for men.

Not really a programming thing. But I once forgot to set a server to use a static ip. So after 3 months of runtime, it had to be restarted. And everything broke.

My first real web project was in my senior year of college.

It was a hacker rank clone. And supported a bunch of languages. It was a fun project.

Others created a static website.
And guess what? they got the same grade as I did.
Fml

Putting SSH on another port and using fail2ban on the default one to ban everyone else trying to get in is a nice thing until you ban your own static ip by forgetting the new port...

Guy to a girl,
"I always thought Love() was a static class, until you made an instance of it."

Python Dev Learning C#: I'll just wait until I run the program to see what type the function returns.
Me: Static typing means you know that before the code even compiles!
Python Dev: Sometimes I forget that all functions explicitly say what they can return.

Yeah all these js files for one static page, hardly one or two functions are getting called.

using 21 js files (most are jquery based) and some 17 or so css files for a simple static one pager,
the only dynamic part is a filtered list of images,
big fuck you to whoever wrote this shit

Today,I found this gem:

static function getConfig(){
$cacheKey = 'foobar';

try {
$config = $this->repository->getConfig();

$this->cache->set($cacheKey, $config);
}
catch(Exception $e){
try{
$config = $this->repository->getConfig();

$this->cache->set($cacheKey, $config);
}
catch(Exception $e){}
}
}

I don't want to live on this planet anymore...!

FUCK STATIC-SIZED ARRAY!!!
FUCK YOU!!!!
FOR MORE THAN 3 HOURS I TRY TO ADD A VALUE TO AN ARRAY
Nothing work...
Nothing...
AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Me : Can I have your Server Access to deploy project.

Client : I don't have server. I will run it on my laptop.

Me : Okay, Are you sure? And do you have static IP?

Client : what's that?
😂

Hello world!

When the app development course is all about static websites 🤔

Two actual lines of code I stumbled upon...

static ArchiveAbstract ARCHIVE_TRUE = new ArchiveTrue();
static ArchiveAbstract ARCHIVE_FALSE = new ArchiveFalse();

Ok you might think, what is going on? Searching for it's usage yields exactly a single case:

if(someVar instanceof ArchiveTrue ? true : false)

So someone managed to introduce 3 new classes... instead of using a simple boolean.
(╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻

I rewrote my static website generation from jekyll to custom python code over single night.
Literally all jekyll plugins I use including seo, rss, syntax highlighting inside markdown content, sitemap, social plugins, css sass, all of it.
Now it’s around 400 lines of python code that I understand completely. I didn’t touch any existing templates and after comparing output I got even better results now and it’s working faster.
I skipped drafts as I don’t need them now.

Why ? Cause now I can make better generator for my side projects that can include some partial website generation, better modification and date handling, tree structure, etc.

What I will do now is that I will parse bunch of content to create markdown files that will be sucked by this generator to create static web pages that will flood internet lol.

Still I didn’t believe it was possible to rewrite all of it so quickly. I sit yesterday around 4pm and finished around 6am.
I started thinking that maybe I am crazy and no one can help me.

unpopular opinion: javascript has broken standards, and nobody corrects it. people use these frameworks and shit with 600 dependencies, then can't figure out how to update their application when things go out of date. now people are expecting you to use NPM to make a - - > static <- - website

In ESnext, private properties are marked with `#`.

Who thought that was a good idea? No really, who thought that was a good idea?

Why not just -- I don't know -- introduce keywords like ... let me think ... public, protected and private!?

Why this:

class MyClass {
a = 1; // .a is public
#b = 2; // .#b is private
static #c = 3;// .#c is private and static

incB() {
this.#b++;
}
}

If this becomes part of the language, no JavaScript developer may joke about php usage of `$` anymore.

You still have the time to update your static site year.

I provide hosting for my clients. About 3 months ago I discovered that the hosting company that I'd been using had been swallowed up by EIG, which explained why the tech support had gone downhill.

So, I jumped to another hosting company. Same shit different company!

Apparently the fact that my browsers sit at "connecting" for up to 30 seconds, and I get a "could not connect to" message half the time while I'm trying to fucking work on a deadline is the fault of some plug-in in a WordPress installation!

Oh yeah? Why then does this shit happen when I'm working on a pure html/css site?
Why then did it start happening after they "updated" my shared server?!

Oh, but the bastards suggest that I buy Cloudflare or pay for more space!

You fuckers made my work take 3 times as long, and you made an important migration fail!

Network places make mistakes. We all do. That's cool. Fucking own up to it, talk to me like a techie, and DON'T TRY TO BLAME IT ON ME OR MY TOOLS!

Fuck you! I think I'm gonna give Google Cloud a try, and do this shit myself!

Arrrrrry new year, you bloody pirates!

For those few of us still running fully static sites: remember to update the year constant, re-compile and upload.

when you make your best at code writting,responsive design, and making everything smooth but the designer get the credit " coz' the design it's what matters" really? i can't imagine browsing a static image..

Getting a static IP has become a kind of a status symbol, my friends are paying extra bucks to ISPs so during parties they can be like `Hey Yo, Ping me at 27.49.36.16 , it's static!` :/

PM with no technical background: "The client needs a static site in WordPress." 😐

- What did a Java static method accused of criminal possession of a weapon said in his deffense?

- "THIS does not belong to me!"

conversation between me and coworker via slack:

me: why ffs does this class extend this class. Calling it as a static?
me: it's called as a static exclusively throughout the entire project. shouldn't it be moved to a core singleton class?
me: yup, moving it to core
me: thanks for being my rubber duck

Biggest annoyance of favorite language:

Python has no static type checking. I know that is not something that is intended for Python. It's just that I enjoy the syntax, but would love the type-safety of something like Kotlin/Java

Dear everyone who doesn't write JS and has some hand-wringing concern about its lack of static typing, lack of threading, or its suitability for large back-end services:

It's fine, we've got this. You go back to discussing contravariance or whatever it is you do.

Signed,
Team JS

Let's write some Java line by line, go!

public static void main(String[] args) {

public class Main {
public static void main(String[] args) {
System.out.println("Hello, World!");
}
}

sorry for my messy code

class Life extends Death{
public static void main(String...args){
Guy me = new Guy();
me.born();
GirlFriend gf = new GirlFriend();
me.setGirlFriend(gf);
me.getMarried();
me.haveSon();
me.die();
}
}

------- Exception on line 5: NullPointerException, girlfriend cannot be null ---

Daaamnn

Annoyance in C: using the same keyword for two unrelated things, process-long memory allocation and internal linkage. Looking at you, static.

The latter should really have been called "intern", just like there is "extern". Far more people would use it if it was named correctly.

History says "static" was chosen for compatibility, allowing older compilers to take new source files.

My friend's finally figuring out basic static RE, i'm so proud

Learn VIM. Unless you're doing Java or some other compiled static typed language. In that case: learn JavaScript and then learn VIM. 😎

*Java*
Friend: So I can have variables on interfaces?
Me: Yeah, just that they are final and static
Friend: ...

I have a server. I want to filter connections to that server so only people on my work network can access the server. A quick search yielded my public IP address.

"Is this static?" I asked IT. "Do we have static IP address?"

"What do you mean? What do you need that for? You better know EXACTLY what you are doing before we release that information to you!!!! This needs to go to my manager. My manager is demanding to know why you want that information - we are having Network Engineering look into this request, someone will be in touch to find out more."

I have now been waiting for 3 hours. I think I will just go ahead and assume my IP is not going to change...

I have an interface implemented by 11 classes, coz u kno, it's "SOLID". But today i felt my life is a lie when a developer refactored my code and deleted all those classes and placed them in a Utils class with static methods, and slapped me with "Let's make it simple".

if you're gona write huge monolithic, 1 file, 1000s of lines, code...at least have the gusto to go all or nothing

don't carve out function after function, for actions only called once, and end up having 100 functions.

or were you trying to reach 69 "static void"s ?

Just purchased a new house and was looking for a new ISP. Found a local ISP that is still offering dial up services and "Professional Website Design". Their website was obviously pre-web 2.0 all static nested tables and sliced images.

private static final String CHANGE_MY_MIND;

const change_my_mind;

How many here know surge.sh? it seems each time I mention it somewhere, nobody knows it, checks it out and thanks me. It basically allows you to host a static webpage on their servers - for free and with custom domain if you wish. They are also the creators of Cordova/Phonegap.

Extensible event system design in c++ - but also includes built-in static types for uniformity and performance.

Happy with it!

Some people in the company (3000+ people) didn't know how to use static variables (c#) in a thread-safe manner which resulted in production problems.

Only possible way to solve this in management's mind?:

Disable the usage of not read-only static variables via quality control...

What kind of seizure of insanity led the devs of Python to believe that static, mutable default parameters could be a good idea? You can literally share whole arrays between multiple calls of the same function with the same input, and the number of cases where a sane person would intentionally want to do that is FUCKING ZERO.

A guy rants a client of mine "anonymously" via his website contact form. How stupid is that. Even worst. He used his static IP connection. Busted! IP forwarded to my client. Turns out he is one of my client's client and has unpaid bills to him :>

A project at work which is based on blindly copying other projects, empty catch clauses, a static class for global variables, and incompetence.

I legit had an interview once where he said
"Ok next question. Static variables...are they good or are they bad"

The funny thing is I can totally relate to working with someone who thinks static variables are bad but it's sad to see this is how far we have fallen.

!rant

I used to doubt the usefulness of regex, until now.
I'm new to web dev, and downloaded a sample website to make a project with, but all the sources of images came as src="images/image.jpg", and for some reason I couldn't make it work, the only way that I found that could work to me was creating a static folder inside my app folder, declaring in the start of the document a {% load static %} and referring the image source as {% static 'images/image.jpg' %} in the html file, I kinda get what this is doing, but why it's the only way that works, it's beyond me.

Great! Now I can start the development server and see the website in its full glory!!! Then I realized: I had to edit the sources of every image and every reference to css and js in 5 html files to it work properly, and come on, do all that by hand?

Then regex came to mind, never had used it, never knew how to use it properly, after some web research I found if I did a find/replace with ([a-z]\w+\/[a-z,-]+\.[a-z]+{1,2}) and {% static '$1' %}, all the work I had to do, was resumed to a single click of replace all.

Man, I love doing what I do, and I love you guys/gals, never tough I would ever find a place in which I could share this kind of thing!

Are you kidding me? such a huge static header! From the top till the prev and next buttons! 😑

I got freelance contact for this simple static website.

Now the client is having a brainstorm and started giving more and more requests for features...

Slowly it's going to be not worth it...

"We enjoy typescript because it helps 'Massage our code' ". Dude if you used javascript enough to understand the difference between excellent and atrocious code then you could "Massage" all you damn well please.

Strict typed languages just keep the developer from making more mistakes. Being a GOOD dynamically typed programmer is an art form in itself. Most will be 'ehhh' cause languages like python/javascript/php allow you to be awful with zero repercussions and that feeling of liberty continues to make them so popular.

Give it up for the javascript developers that do not need a strict typed language to keep their ducks in a row or their tests in line.

Because we don't have a static IP at the office, why don't we implement two factor auth for SSH?

No that's too complicated, let's just update the IP every week and we'll leave webmin available as a backdoor for ourselves to do so.

I just had a programming test.
I'm such a fucking stupid retard.
What I should've written:

static bool NotAnd(bool a, bool b) => !(a && b);

What I did:

static bool NotAnd(bool a, bool b) => a != b;

So instead of !AND, I wrote a fucking XOR. I got everything else right but not the simplest of all.
Great birthday so far.

Came across an app that I really liked, but unfortunately, development has ceased for it. That also means I can't pay for it in order to get a license key. So what's a developer to do?

DECOMPILE it

After decompiling it, I placed inside the code that I paid for the app 😂

.field public static final MARKET:Ljava/lang/String; = "paid"

Why would anybody use dynamically typed languages? I mean it is lot safer to use static languages, no? No weird bugs, no weird outputs...

How they manage to write such big applications in dynamical languages?

Keeping myself from getting bored af at work. I am a backend engineer doing mostly frontend. And right now it ain't even the interesting stuff. I am merely passing photoshop files to static displays.

Kill me. Every once in a while I do maintenance on Java and PHP apps, but still...bored.....more Rails or Django please

Just one or two days ago there was a guy asking for opinions on his UI (a reddit viewer app). I couldn't find him and wanted to ask him a question tho.

You probably use some class for fetching the data from reddit, hoe to you make it accessible within your app? Storing a static instance within the application class (like many do with the application context) and using that one?

Would be nice if you could answer ^^

Static, everything is static, static methods everywhere ☹️

I'll give few static methods/variables theses and I would like if you guys would give me your thoughts (especially low level coders)

Methods:
1. All static methods are good practice as long as they don't use global variables (I think it should use less ram)

2. Same as first but used only by single class

3. Same as first two but used by single line in whole code

Variables:
1. As long as it's const (final)

2. As long as multiple instances needs same value and it's always the same (ex some PC spec)

So, everything that I mentioned isn't horrible practice in my opinion, but still, I try to keep distance from static stuff (aside utils classes)

Can we please make a Over Engineered Section....

This happened a couple of weeks ago...
Hey platform engineer team, we need a environment spun up, it's a static site, THATS IT!

PE Team response.. okay give us a 2 weeks we need to write some terraform, update some terraform module, need you to sign your life away as the aws account owner, then use this internal application to spin up a static site, then customize the yml file to use nuxt, then we will need you to use this other internal tool to push to prod...

ME: ITS a static site... all I need is a s3 bucket, cloudfront, and circleci

I try to exercise a lot of patience when training other devs. Hell, I have always asked stupid questions and will continue to do so. But yesterday I almost reached my breaking point when the guy I was training (who is not young nor entry level) asked me where the CSS files were for a static HTML page. I had to awkwardly say, "they're located at the path being linked to in the head" 😣

Unsigned type means mod 2^n. It's not rocket science, argh!

Context: colleagues surprised by/demand comments for code like: static constexpr unsigned max_value = -1;

Recommended alternative: static constexpr unsigned max_value = std::numeric_limits<unsigned>::max();

Which will work great until someone carelessly increases the width of max_value to size_t or somesuch.

I recently got into an argument with some people, and I want your opinion. I did a speed code in Java (just sped up clip of programming, because it looks cool lol), and someone commented:

"Way too much static abuse here. Jesus"

In which I replied:

"Actually, sir. There is near none at all, just because I use static methods does not make it static abuse. A static method belongs to the class, and is somewhat permanent. It is not a type (instance, cat, dog, animal, etc.) class, it is a Utility class, much like other dependencies you'd use are Utilities and not types."

To which they reply:

"Getting and setting is a Utility?"

Boi. If it is a static variable, yes. Like, what?

I was working with a stable installation of an elaborated platform. Some plugins were installed. After upgrading the installation by 2 patch level the customer registration was not working anymore.

In these two patch level a method in an interface got an additional optional parameter which had a major impact on the behaviour the implemented method. A plugin decorated the implementation without knowing about the new parameter. Therefore when calling the method the decorating class did not pass the new parameter in to the decorated implementation and the fallback value was given instead.

The caller expected the method to do something and did not branch into an alternative way but the default value disables the expected behaviour. Eventually nothing happened.

Breaking changes in patch levels woop di fucking do.

does reactjs make anyone else start craving static HTML sites?

How to write a proper Hello World program in Java:

public class ProperJavaProgram {
    public static void main(String[] args) {
        try {
            // Write the hello world file
            List<String> lines = Arrays.asList(
                    "#include <stdio.h>",
                    "int main() {",
                    "printf(\"Hello World!\\n\");",
                    "return 0;",
                    "}"
            );
            Path file = Paths.get("awesome-program.c");
            Files.write(file, lines, Charset.forName("UTF-8"));

            // Execute the file
            executeCommand("cc awesome-c-program.c -o awesome-executable");
            executeCommand("./awesome-executable");
        } catch (IOException e) {
            System.out.println("You're screwed, just use Java and get over it. " + e);
        }
    }

    public static void executeCommand(String command) {
        try {
            Process p = Runtime.getRuntime().exec(command); // Run the process
            BufferedReader stdInput = new BufferedReader(new InputStreamReader(p.getInputStream())); // Get the output
            String s; // Print out the output
            while ((s = stdInput.readLine()) != null) {
                System.out.println(s);
            }
        } catch (IOException e) {
            System.out.println("You're screwed, just use Java and get over it. " + e); // UR SCREWED
        }
    }
}

All classes (with a few exceptions) have nothing but static methods just so that I can call them like "Class::Method()" from anywhere in the project...

C# developer: static typing and precompilation make my language really fast! *writes service that makes 50 synchronous database calls for every request*

When your director wants a single flat static webpage(a simple advertisement with a form), but forces you to create it within Wordpress

....talk about clunky

Me: the web app is downloading a lot of static content while loading the page, leading to the app being very slow in low bandwidth locations. can you ensure compression is enabled while serving static files ?

UI Developer: sure, I'll look into​ that. Btw, I have a question reg that.

Me: yes, pls.

UI Developer: once the compressed static files are downloaded to the browser​, should I write a separate module to uncompress them ?

Me: :-(Strategic Facepalm)

Why the FUCK are my project ideas so easy to implement. I wanted to make a static site sharing webpage (imagine github pages), and i fucking made it in 2 hours?????? Fuck me, does anyone know something like codewars or something but with project ideas instead of algorithms?

Use different indentations in same program.
for(.....) {

}

if
{
}
else
{
}

void doSomething
{
}

static{

}

I have to stick to one convention anyhow soon.. :/

Interviewer: Could you please make a class to force it create one instance at most?
Me: Sure!
(I didn't know the singleton pattern)

class A {
public static bool isCreated = false;
A() {
if(isCreated == true)
throw new Exception();
isCreated = true;
}
}

!rant

Started learning Rust yesterday. As a web developer I like the static typing and the speed. I want to know a low-level language to complement Python but kind of dislike C and C++ and that's why I chose Rust. At the moment the syntax still feels kind of foreign but I probably need to just man up and embrace it. :)

8 hours of networking/static routing exercises...

Result?

Windows bug: system provides two standardgateways

Let me write that again:
Two STANDARDgateways

Neither me nor my teacher found out how this happened

At what point is coding not coding anymore. When are you not considered a programmer?

Level 0 - Online Website Creation Tool
Level 1 - Programs that generate static HTML from markdown
Level 2 - Bootstrap
Level 3 - Using a JS framework
Level 4 - Using HTML and CSS (from scratch)

Understanding the usage of

public static void main (String... args)

I think I fucked up today's interview. Opening with non-technical questions really threw me off kilter.
"What happened the last time you conflicted with another team member?"
IDK, ask me what "static" means in C# or just let me solve "FizzBuzz".

Without using editor...
public class Test {
public static void main(String[ ] args) {
int value = 3, sum = 6 + --value;
int data = --value + ++value / sum++ * value++ + ++sum % value--;
System.out.println(data);
}
}

a) 1 b) 2
c) 0 c) 3

I created a class Log with a method d(String tag, String text) to replicate Android's log method in Flutter.

class Log {
static void d(String tag, String text) { print(tag + ": " + text); }
}

I replaced all 'print' into 'Log.d' in my project and I wondered why emulator kept crashing for the past two days.

Now I know..

Fuck isps where you have to pay like $50 for a static ip. Im tryna set up a wemos for automating stuff, and the only way to ping from my phone is pinging a vps that has an open socket towards the wemos :/

protected static new readonly

// just no

using System;

namespace HelloWorld {
class Hello {
static void Main() {
Console.WriteLine("Hello World!");
}
}
}

So, yeah, hello DevRant...
But that you don't thing I am insane, I also know how to survive in C++ and Python.
Besides the fact that I utilize Mono on my Linux server I am crazy enough to admin Windows servers.

interface Flyable {
public static final int wings = 2;
void fly();
}

This is a good use of interface a/c to my CS Prof
(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻

I have found some subdomains of a specific domain.
I know the subdomains are up but when i try to load them , firefox says "unable to connect".

What might have caused this?
A static ip or mac address?

When a fucking $60 paid WordPress theme has endless-scroll implemented, but the client decided for a static start-page and this damn theme will continue loading content when scrolling to the bottom, but doesn't display the new content, because it should be a static page. (It still loads content but just disables displaying the new content)

So, in three minutes scrolling the start page, I downloaded 0,5GB of images, that aren't visible.
Told the client, who's using this theme on 8 websites (and paid 8 times). He's writing a bug report.

Why are there barely any material design based static site libraries using js and CSS -,-

Don't use node or anything so guess I'll be building my own 😁🔫

Does the ease of “hacking”/breaking AI scare anyone else?

I remember a slide from a security presentation I saw once where there were three sections, the first was an AI classification of some animal with about 60% confidence, the second was a small grey static (think old tv static type thing) with a label next to it saying 10% and the third was an AI classification of the first picture overplayed with 10% of that noise and it had 95% confidence that the animal was COMPLETELY DIFFERENT.

Adding just 10% noise and AI goes batshit crazy. (No it was not a bat afaik)

THINK ABOUT THIS IN TERMS OF STOP SIGNS. WELP.

I've tried to give it many chances, but I just don't think Python will ever be for me. Even "quick and dirty" scripts are faster for me in a statically-typed language with static syntax checking and sensible code completion.

FUCKING CSS and browser inconsistencies.

Trying to make a simple static site but these fucking browsers are making it so hard I want to program console application instead.

Also for some reason mobile Firefox don't give the right window height and width fuck everything.

So I'm kind of a fledgling webdev. Where would I go to learn how to do backend in order to do logins, manage inventory, create posts, that kind of thing?

I know a little bit of PHP, HTML, and CSS, but only enough to make static pages... it's kind of bad...

Just experienced a static website giving me a session expired message...
What a time to be alive.

Can't touch this

My "senior developer" colleague just committed 300Mbs worth of node modules in addition to static files bundle. So not only I have to wait 20mins for the changeset to download on this god damned internet over barrels connection but also resolve merge conflicts on 100+ files. You think that was a mistake? Oh no I've asked him about it and it was intentional ...

Imma jus start callin uhlee niggas who touch me electronics wo/ discharging their static electricity fat fucken retards 🤙

In production, whenever nginx can't find an upstream it will display a static 'maintenance' html file that tells the user the come back later

In development, it shows clippy :D

Trying to unit test legacy code with lots of static methods suuccks!

During my first job as software engineer I was assign to setup meta data upon implementing the meta data I accidentally forgot to remove the static og:title="Im ocabafox and Im handsome AF" and it was deploy to production. After few days someone send an email that when they share to facebook there is a text Im ocabafox and Im handsome AF. :D

dear ietf-people i want to thank you that tls1.3 is official. i know it was hard work to say just no to the doughbags and preventing that middleware and spyware manufacturers implementing static keys.
to make it short:
Thank you for your hard work

Since becoming an "Architect", I've come to learn "Architect" simply means siphoning your will by eliminating all opportunities to actually write code ...

public class Architect {

static final boolean inMeeting = true;
private int will;

public static void main(String args[]){

Architect me = new Architect();
if(me.inMeeting){
while(meeting.active){
me.reactToEvents();
}
}else{
me.writeCode();
}

}

public void reactToEvents(){
if(new Random().nextInt() % 3 == 0)
will -= this.hit(this.face, this.palm, Force.CONSIDERABLE);
else
will -= this.hit(Office.desk, this.head, Force.MODERATE);
}

public int hit(Object object, Object with, Force force){
object.useForce(force);
object.moveTo(with);
return new Random().nextInt();
}
}

I'm dockerizing this old CMS that needs a database query to resolve URLs for static assets.

Yes, a query for every single static resources. Fuck me.

Pet peeve: the claim that static typing prevents errors.

Today I worked on a C# project that's a mess of nulls, side-effects, inferences, and race conditions. Then I went back to a JS project that's twice the size but written in a clean, well-tested, FP style and currently has fewer than 10 issues logged.

Look, I get that there are upsides to static typing, and I'm open to introducing typescript or flow for our JS code.

I just can't stand the faux-concern from the static typing dingleberries when they are the ones who produce these horrendous lumps of unmaintainable shit, and the JS/Python/Ruby/etc people are over here quietly reinventing functional programming and code modularity.

Do I go to object-oriented hell?
Edit: sc and cc are now unset in Connect

Finally set up my home server and port forwarded it so I can use linux everywhere even as a window pleb.

Now just to make a solution for not having a static IP address...

The cool feeling when you see your static analyzer that compare previous version and future release and code quality is improved.

At the same time the bad feeling because you was the same dev that made the previous version.

Took a whack at installing arch...

I failed. 😔
My rj-45 port is broken and i I couldn't figure out how to manually set a static ip, default gateway and dns for the wifi interface thru the terminal when installing.

Oh well. Maybe next time

Folks,

What static site generator do you prefer, and why?

I want to set up a website for a small business and do not want to spend a lot of time on it but it also should be blazing fast.

My familiarity with react leads me to Gatsby, but there are probably good alternatives.

It should also be easy for the (non-tech) admin then to create posts on a news page or even new pages (probably with Markdown).

Thank you in advance!

Building games for people to whom the expression "game design" evaluates to "game UI design", which a fancier way to say "a bunch of static slides with arbitrary screenshots"

The road to hell is paved with static typing, transpilers and bloated dev-environments.

Static UI designs are no longer acceptable for site or applications. UX today is equally about the large and subtle animations. The way to forms, boxes, text, header and buttons react with the users choices. Handing a dev an image of an apps view is doing half the job in today’s web market.

So I reinstalled Ubuntu server and set the ip to 204, but I forgot that I assigned a static ip to it in my dhcp. I guess it has two IPv4 addresses now? How? Only one NIC 🤔

The most interesting part of learning Jekyll is trying to remember how to type 'Jekyll' correctly...

Having a static class in C# with 20 variables of generic type: ArrayList with zero documentation to know type of array content 😒

In my previous job, we had in c# a class called static manager. This abomination was thousands of lines long, every member static. Eventually the dev responsible, did split it in to multiple files each thousands of lines using partial class. Worst part? It wasn't even legacy code yet.

That moment when you get your first job after getting your degree and one of your co-workers with about 5 years of experience asks you what is a static class because he never used one...

I mean come on... You have 5 years of xp and never used a static before? x)

This project is going places...

Did I screw up or is it ok doing this?

1. Calling another method inside the same factory file
2. Calling a method from another factory file
3. All factory methods are static because they only depend on their passed parameter(s)

I just hate Comcast. All I want is a static IP to host a server on BUT NOOOO COMCAST BE LIKE BITCH YOU GOTTA BUY OUR ENTERPRISE PLAN FOR SOME RIDICULOUS AMOUNT FOR A STATIC IP

I've been writing various forms of OOP for three years and just now learned exactly what static means

Static typing : one boyfriend/girlfriend is enough for me

Dynamic typing : prostitute/womanizing mode activated (i have the right to fuck who ever i want)

WHICH KIND OF IDIOT KEEPS PREVIOUS CALCULATION AS STATIC INSIDE A FUNCTION IN A LIBRARY!!!! Took me a while to understand why when I double the chip set, I start to get random behaviours.....

I'm absolutely exhausted...
Just spent the past 2 days restructuring our SAAS products entire server network on AWS just so we can have a static IP address for all our server instances passing through an NAT....because we need to integrate with another service that only allows you to access their API if they whitelist your IP.

When I overhear a senior dev explain a static class to a dev who makes twice as much as me it kind of pisses me off.

U've seen one dev creating Java-Classes like 'GetLevel' which contain only one method that is called 'getLevel'. And it wasn't even a static method.

public class Celebrations {

public static void WishHappyBirthday(String toWho) {
if(toWho == null || toWho.isEmpty()){
System.out.println("Can't wish" +
"happy birthday to" +
"someone that doesn't exist");
return;
}

System.out.println("Happy Birthday " +
toWho + "!!!");
}
}

I once had a Pakistani client on Freelancer who offered me almost 300$ just for a static two-page website.

I agreed,and later found out it was for a Ponzi scheme.

You know your doing a quick and dirty job for a diagnostic tool when every method you create in alternate namespaces is static...

Suppose I should probably stop doing that aye...

Sitting here scrolling my timeline seeing my friends and family getting engaged, getting their degrees, getting new jobs, talking about #addictedtosuccess and all that. Meanwhile I'm just here like "Should I use a constructor or a static method for this?" 🤷🏽‍♂️

OOP devs bringing anti-patterns to golang be like:
“Let’s write new shitty dependency injection container package where you can link dep to string and loose static type benefits”.

class smoking{

public static void main ( String []args){
int a = 2;
String c = "cigarettes";
if (a==2)
System.out.print ("go smoke "+ c);
else if (a <2)
System.out.println ("go buy some");
else
System.out.println ("error");

}
}

public static Map<Integer, List<Integer>> stuff(arguments) {
HashMap<Integer, List<Integer>> map = new HashMap<>();
method(map, otherVariables);
return map;
}
public static void method(HashMap map, otherVariables) {
map.put(things);
}

So... You know how to return a map from a method. Then why do you create the map outside the method and make it an argument that does not get returned, making it confusing because the map gets created empty, given to a different method, then returned, making it look like you're returning an empty map...
...instead of just creating it inside the called method, returning it and assigning it to a map in the calling method? Even if you think that would create another map (it doesn't), the compiler is intelligent and can optimise that away.

Spent months building a full regression testing framework app at the request of my boss...

Now he just says need a simple app to test a few static URLs...

I could've written that in 1 day... FML...

And now I've been pulled away from the main thing he wanted me to work on...

and keeps asking if it's done yet...

participating at an coding challenge.

the mission is to write an game solver for an game engine - in java. based on astar, pathfinding should be made possible by cloning objects.
never seen a so hardly misconcepted challenge, where character instances and their variables are static and contain uncloneable data😂 oh god what a waste of time realizing this bs

Whatsapp Status of a friend:
static into nohobbies = this.MAX_VALUE;

Static site generators are fun and games until you try to add a self hosted image file to your site. 😢

Does anyone else think some of the Sonar rules are actually crap?

In particular the Put all you variables above methods one?

I have some static methods and variables and some object ones.

Apart from creating a new class for them which I think is over kill for just a few helper methods, don't you feel you should keep all static stuff separate?

Clean code shouldn't be about following arbitrary debatable rules, it should be preventing the horrible crap that any experienced developer would instantly call shit... If he didn't write it.

And I'm pretty sure I'm experienced so if I'm not calling a price of code shit...I don't see why Sonar should...

Me (sysop) : in order to access our servers, you have to give us your WAN static IP...
Developer : yes I have a static IP... 192.... 168...
Me (don't know wether to laugh or cry...) : O.K. !

Me: *Building my own CSS and JS framework for static websites and testing it as i go while building my work site*

Inner me: Stop remaking the wheel, use MDL!

Me: *Starts sweating furiously*

Why must JS and CSS be so bloody horrible to build with from scratch, should I just use MDL and extend it with some custom classes or keep powering forward?

a singelton class with four public static fields.
when you all you is a hammer....

I kept wondering why would anyone declare a private static variable until I needed one myself.

Method passing as argument.

Fuck you who are doing that.

FUCK YOU !!!!

Use fucking STATIC !!!!!!!!

How to serve a static file when infra setup is something every hard to do?

<script src="/path/to/my/fav/lang.cxx?filename=mystaticfile.js" type="text/javascript" />

... Brilliant !

I´m learning C # basic concepts and a question has come up after doing this exercise:

using System;

namespace exercise
{
class MainClass
{
public static void Main (string[] args)
{

console.WriteLine("Type your name");
String name = Console.ReadLine ();

console.WriteLine("Type one city");
String city = Console.ReadLine ();

console.WriteLine("Hello"+ name + "wellcome to " + city )
Console.ReadLine ();

}
}
}

Question: its necessary to put the last
Console.ReadLine ();?Why?

Trying to create a dedicated server but stupid comcast won't give me a static IP 😰

Which static site generator are you using?

Jekyll vs Hugo vs Gatsby vs Hexo ...

I want to build my personal blog using it, I've also used ghost.

Which one is better in terms of performance?

One of these days my Windows 10 system will actually figure out how to obtain an IPv6 address without needing me to manually run ipconfig /renew6 or disable/reenable the network adapter... For now, static IPv6 it is

My colleague is having fever with reactjs and tools. Why the hell a 5 pages static cooperate website of our own need to use webpack?! How often we need to update the site? And today he spent whole day configure his gulp and deployment automation. If I were him, I would have finish the task with bootstrap, jquery and filezilla.

netlify.com boom!

!rant
Python is a language I love to use. But after using a typed language I just so wanted that feature in Python. And guess what, there's already a project that does that - mypy! Static typing for Python. Just wow!

Got a new job and I'm moving from academia to industry. Decided to step up my web dev game by using Netlify and GatsbyJS to build a static site blog.

Not a difficult task but it forces me to look at more current technologies.

For months had a static clicking very faint noise on my creative speakers. Googled every issue with my x-fi titanium, swapped pcie around, changed cables you name it. In the end I blamed "dying" speakers amp as they have 10 years now only to realize a minute ago it was interference from the fecking cell phone's 4g...

Who the fuck invented the glorified pile of shit people call laravel? Is this actually used in PROD for anything else than load testing a monitoring server by creating loads of error messages?
OOP exists for a reason, not to create bazillions of classes with static methods.
Dump that shit ffs!

public static void turnItUpTo(int val) {
this.setLevel(val);
}

public static void main(String[] args) {
turnItUpTo(11);
System.out.println("Rock out");
}

Jesus fucking christ! I've been hired by this bank to improve the quality of their online banking software. Zero unit tests and I'm tasked to make it testable as much as possible.

Guess what? Almost the whole fucking codebase uses static classes everywhere!!! Good luck unit testing that.... what a bummer. It is a challenge though.