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Search - "life choices"
I just feel that I have to get this of my chest, because this have really me and my family really negative.
It have destroyed my will to be happy, sort of.
Well, my father have some kind of control behaviour. My whole life he has been angry on stuff that does not really matter
and I have always been the one that get all the shit - because I am the oldest. I was never allowed (maybee 3-4 times between age 8-15) to have any friends
over or stay with friends over night or after school. Because they "where bad and I would become like them".
I am happy that I meet my wife 6 years ago and moved away from home when I was 20, I kinda fled the situation from home to start my own life.
My father has always hated when boy/men had long hair and alot of beard - but that is something I always wanted to have. So when I moved from home
I start to let everything grow.
Two years ago, things got really fucked up when I did not shave all my beard of and cut down my hair because my mom had birthday. I did it the week after
because my brother graduated from school and we where going to visit, we did not want a repeat the situation from a couple of weeks before. After that I got
another job as a Linux sysadmin and started to grow the hair and beard again.
Last monday, my dad called and said that I am not welcome to visit them anymore. I am a "bad example" for my sibling
and he also said "you brother and sister does not feel so good (my sister fainted a couple of days before, which I did not know) so I have no time to care about you and your family"
I was stunned, I really wish that this was a joke but it is'nt.
I have always been bashed because of the choices I make in my life and for my own family (wife, and two kids + one more kid any day now)
When I choose to work with something that I love, they said that I am stupid because they basically think "that the PC is full of SATAN".
When they realized that I make more money than my parents combined they went silent.
I just wanted to write this shit of my chest, it is really fucked up and I am starting to loose the ability to have feelings - if you know what I mean.
Thank you devrant, for being one of the fun things I do, when I read all the rage, fucked up stories, hate, and so on. I do not feel alone :)
PS: I promise you, that you guys/gals will be the first one to know when my new kiddo arrives21
Worst thing you've seen another dev do? Long one, but has a happy ending.
Classic 'Dev deploys to production at 5:00PM on a Friday, and goes home.' story.
The web department was managed under the the Marketing department, so they were not required to adhere to any type of coding standards and for months we fought with them on logging. Pre-Splunk, we rolled our own logging/alerting solution and they hated being the #1 reason for phone calls/texts/emails every night.
Wanting to "get it done", 'Tony' decided to bypass the default logging and send himself an email if an exception occurred in his code.
At 5:00PM on a Friday, deploys, goes home.
Around 11:00AM on Sunday (a lot folks are still in church at this time), the VP of IS gets a call from the CEO (who does not go to church) about unable to log into his email. VP has to leave church..drive home and find out he cannot remote access the exchange server. He starts making other phone calls..forcing the entire networking department to drive in and get email back up (you can imagine not a group of happy people)
After some network-admin voodoo, by 12:00, they discover/fix the issue (know it was Tony's email that was the problem)
We find out Monday that not only did Tony deploy at 5:00 on a Friday, the deployment wasn't approved, had features no one asked for, wasn't checked into version control, and the exception during checkout cost the company over $50,000 in lost sales.
Was Tony fired? Noooo. The web is our cash cow and Tony was considered a top web developer (and he knew that), Tony decided to blame logging. While in the discovery meeting, Tony told the bosses that it wasn't his fault logging was so buggy and caused so many phone calls/texts/emails every night, if he had been trained properly, this problem could have been avoided.
Well, since I was responsible for logging, I was next in the hot seat.
For almost 30 minutes I listened to every terrible thing I had done to Tony ever since he started. I was a terrible mentor, I was mean, I was degrading, etc..etc.
Me: "Where is this coming from? I barely know Tony. We're not even in the same building. I met him once when he started, maybe saw him a couple of times in meetings."
Andrew: "Aren't you responsible for this logging fiasco?"
Me: "Good Lord no, why am I here?"
Andrew: "I'll rephrase so you'll understand, aren't you are responsible for the proper training of how developers log errors in their code? This disaster is clearly a consequence of your failure. What do you have to say for yourself?"
Me: "Nothing. Developers are responsible for their own choices. Tony made the choice to bypass our logging and send errors to himself, causing Exchange to lockup and losing sales."
Andrew: "A choice he made because he was not properly informed of the consequences? Again, that is a failure in the proper use of logging, and why you are here."
Me: "I'm done with this. Does John know I'm in here? How about you get John and you talk to him like that."
'John' was the department head at the time.
Andrew:"John, have you spoken to Tony?"
John: "Yes, and I'm very sorry and very disappointed. This won't happen again."
John: "You know what. Did you even fucking talk to Tony? You just sit in your ivory tower and think your actions don't matter?"
Me: "Whoa!! What are you talking about!? My responsibility for logging stops with the work instructions. After that if Tony decides to do something else, that is on him."
John: "That is not how Tony tells it. He said he's been struggling with your logging system everyday since he's started and you've done nothing to help. This behavior ends today. We're a fucking team. Get off your damn high horse and help the little guy every once in a while."
Me: "I don't know what Tony has been telling you, but I barely know the guy. If he has been having trouble with the one line of code to log, this is the first I've heard of it."
John: "Like I said, this ends today. You are going to come up with a proper training class and learn to get out and talk to other people."
Over the next couple of weeks I become a powerpoint wizard and 'train' anyone/everyone on the proper use of logging. The one line of code to log. One line of code.
A friend 'Scott' sits close to Tony (I mean I do get out and know people) told me that Tony poured out the crocodile tears. Like cried and cried, apologizing, calling me everything but a kitchen sink,...etc. It was so bad, his manager 'Sally' was crying, her boss 'Andrew', was red in the face, when 'John' heard 'Sally' was crying, you can imagine the high levels of alpha-male 'gotta look like I'm protecting the females' hormones flowing.
Took almost another year, Tony released a change on a Friday, went home, web site crashed (losses were in the thousands of $ per minute this time), and Tony was not let back into the building on Monday (one of the best days of my life).10
That late coffee was a mistake... (For the millionth time)
Now I have to sit in bed for 2 hours contemplating my life choices...
Spoiler: not good!4
That moment when you've spent 3 hours debugging only to realise you weren't wrong. You were just debugging the wrong variable name...
I can stop questioning my life choices now.2
Had a recruiter contact me at home on my day off.
Recruiter: We have a company that would be interested in hiring a C# developer because of your programming skillset.
Me: Does it involve ASP.NET?
Recruiter: Oh, is Java an in demand skill that companies want?
....Why are you talking to me mate? Take off your headset, go home, and rethink your life choices.4
Recently I've been procrastinating a hell lot by watching random youtube videos, so I made a little Chrome extension to keep me focused. I personally find it quite fun.
Crowwwww is an extension that helps you to stay focused. Whenever you go on a work-irrelevant site like youtube or reddit, a very judgmental-looking crow will appear on the screen and stare into your soul, forcing you to reconsider your life choices and go back to work.
(whitelisted sites are configurable of course)10
> be me
> spend 0.02 Ether (about €5) on one of those old-school MUD-style games
> send to the same Ethereum wallet from a previous purchase
> realize that the destination wallet changes for each purchase (probably to mitigate the fact that transaction history and contents in Ethereum wallets is entirely public)
> send an email to the game dev asking to return the transaction or pass it on to my player account
> *cricket noises*
About a week later, i.e. now:
*checks that Ethereum account that I accidentally sent that transaction to*
> $0 on it, transaction has been withdrawn
Now I couldn't care less about the €5 - it's only 2 beers worth - but what I do care about is honesty. Dear Chat Wars admin, that money wasn't yours. Also, I am one of those players that plays very few games but tends to commit to those I do play. The last one I played, I spent several hundreds of euros on over the couple of years I played it. I could've probably paid for your servers, spare time development and then some. But obviously not anymore. Choosing a quick grab of €5 over a relatively steady source of income from someone that tends to financially support what he likes... Re-evaluate your life choices.
Just like that incident with the stolen flash drive that was worth only €10... I couldn't care less about the raw value of them, but I do feel very disappointed in humanity when people go for a quick grab of such worthless things.5
That one time when it took me 3 days to fix a bug, which ended up being literally one character missing.
I was questioning my life choices for another 3 days.2
(Best read while listening to AEnima by Tool, loudly)
Dear Current Workplace,
Fuck you, for the reasons enumerated below.
Fuck your enterprise grey blue offices, the stifling warm air of a hundreds of bodies and sub par "development laptops".
Fuck your shitty carbonated water machines which were a cost saving measure over decent drinkable water.
Fuck your fake "flexi time", "you can do home office whenever you want" bullshit. You're still inviting me to mandatory meetings at 09:00 regularly.
Fuck your shitty, in house, third part IT provider sister company. They're the worst of all worlds. If it was in company, we'd get to give out to them, if it was an external company we'd fire them. And yes, when I quit I will quote the dumpster fire that is our corporate VPN as a major factor.
Fuck your cheery, bland, enterprise communication. Words coming under the corporate letterhead seem to lose all association with meaning. Agile, communication, open are things you write and profess to respect, but it seems your totally lack understanding of their meaning.
Fuck your client driven development. Sometime you actually have to fix the foundations before you can actually add new features. And fuck you management who keep on asking "why are there so many bugs and why is it always taking longer to deliver new releases". Because of you, you fucknuts, Because you can't say "NO" to the customer. Because you never listen to your own experienced developers.
Fuck your bullshit "code quality is important to us" line. If it's so important, then let us fix the heap of shit you're selling so that it works like a quasi functional program.
Fuck you development environment which has 250 projects in a single VS solution. Which takes 5mins plus to compile on a quad core i7 with 32 gb of ram.
Fuck this bullshit ball of mud "architecture". I spend most of my time trying to figure out where the logic should go and the rest of the time writing converters between different components. All because 7 years ago some idiot "architect" made a decision that they didn't have to live with.
Actually, fuck that guy in particular. Yeah, that guy who was the responsible architect for the project for 4 years and not once opened the solution to look a the code.
Fuck the manual testing of every business process. Manual setup of the entities takes 10mins plus and then when you run, boom either no message or some bullshit error code.
Fuck the antiquated technology choices which cause loads of bugs and slow down development. Fuck you for forcing me to do manual tests of another developers code at 20:00 on a Friday night because we can't get our act together to do this automatically.
Fuck you for making sure it's very clear I'm never going to be anything but a code monkey in this structure. Managers are brought in from outside.
Fuck you for being surprised that it's hard to hire competent developers in this second rate, overpriced town. It's hard to hire anywhere but this bland shithole would have anyone with half a clue running away at top speed.
Fuck you for valuing long hours and loyalty over actual performance. That one guy who everyone hated and was totally incompetent couldn't even get himself fired. He had to quit.
Fuck you for your mediocrity.
Fuck you for being the only employer for my skill-set in the region; paying just well enough that changing jobs locally doesn't make sense, but badly enough that it's difficult to move.
Fuck you for being the stable "safe" option so that any move is "risky".
Fuck your mediocrity.
Fuck you for being something I think about when I'm not at work. Not only is it shit from 9 to 5 you manage to suck the joy out of everything else in my life as well?
Fuck you for making me feel like a worse developer every day I work here. Fuck you for making every day feel like a personal and professional failure. Fuck you for making me seriously leave a career I love for something, anything else.
Fuck you for making the most I can hope for when I get up in the morning is to just make it until the night.6
I work as a software developer for a small and specialized company on a very popular, albeit niche, piece of system software.
This software has been around for a while, and in that while it has ages. If there is one thing you could say to have aged gracefully--well, this thing ain't it. The codebase itself is what anyone would expect of a large-ish C++/C product started in the mid 2000s: documented poorly (and where it is documented, documented *wrong*), full of obscure bugs, full of idiosyncratic design choices that caused the obscure bugs in the first place, and a code style--or rather a general approach to software engineering--taken straight fom the 80s.
It is also fair to say that the product has been developed by marketing. What started out as a company-internal project to help others get work done was perceived as valuable for others, quickly rushed out to market, and "developed" by listening to whichever customer screamed loudest at that point in time. ("Developed", in the "duct tape and WD40" style of development similar to an early 90s web page: the result has no class, no style and everything users find "interesting" to interact with is a java applet.)
About six months ago the powers that be finally acknowledged that a codebase that has not seen a single line of refactoring since its inception over ten years ago is not a solid foundation for further business. What was once an openly hostile attitude towards refactoring and general improvement of the codebase itself rather than the set of user-visible functions slowly morphed into a secretly hostile attitude. Upper-level management continued to denigrate developers seeking to improve the system citing their own experience ten years ago as reason why things must still be done exactly as they have did. Parts of this upper-level management were soon complimented on their work and it was suggested they take the next step in their carreer.
Which they did, with two toes of one foot. The other eight remained in internal discussions and, more importantly, inside the head and arse of the new managers. Which promptly turned just as secretly hostile and blocked all attempts at improvement. Instead it is highlighted that the developers are clearly not smart enough to do their jobs.
Meanwhile the entire project is falling behind deadlines. We've failed to deliver on three accounts already and are now nine months behind on another plan that was set for 15 months nine months ago. (Yes. We have officially started working on this thing, but no work has been done. More to the point, work has been *started*, but is stalled or rejected continuously because "that's not what we would have done five years ago" or "you can't change that, whoever wrote it must have thought about this a lot.")
And now upper-level management has begun reverting changes that same upper-level management has requested and signed off on. Without communication. So that developers don't start work on things they have not signed off on (because they don't read the plans or give any feedback). Because developers are not qualified for their jobs and must be closely monitored to ensure they don't break stuff. Which was already broken. Because the product has been bitrotting since birth.
Fuck my life.3
I did some grave and irreversible mistakes in my life
- Never gathered enough courage to mingle with women when I was younger and now the hope is lost
- Compromised my values and mental wellness when I met a narcissistic bitch
- Did not invest money wisely when markets were sailing low and allowed that good sum to sit in bank
- Did not plan health and term insurance at early age when premiums could have been low
- Out of fear, did not follow my gut to purchase gold because my father was acting crazy (or else my money would have been doubled)
- Did not plan my taxation well (or until now would have paid almost zero tax)
- Did not define strict boundaries and allowed people to overstep (or else I would have better friends and family relationships)
- Did not quit my job early and stuck with low paying shit with negative learning, for years (or else I would have grown exponentially)
Thankfully few things I did right are, spending more time with my mom and learning from my mistakes.
I hope I don't make such stupid life choices again.15
A sign in front of startup office:
Do not feed the developers! We keep them on a soylent diet - eating real food might make them question their life choices.
If you ever feel bad about your life choices just remember that my classmate spent 53 bitcoins on a mining machine 5 years ago (never made its price back).
Today that'd be $883616 or £6515282
Would anyone like to do my job for me today, I really don’t feel like it. It’ll involve the following:
10 minutes: coffee
20 minutes: find next Jira ticket that is actually ready to be worked on
5 hours: figure out WTF is being requested
2 hours: reconsider life choices, have a small existential crisis
30 minutes: find part of code to change
2 minutes: update code and create PR
That’s it really. Anyone interested?4
There's always a moment when your entire codebase starts breaking up piece by piece and you just wonder why did you choose this job, why you are a programmer, why you don't work at a bar or something like that10
First day of the academic year(CS):
(some uni official) - "And remember to become a good programmer you have to become an excellent mathematician first"
(Me): Oh shit.
Little did I know...
It is a second year now. And the only course I failed is the one that he lectured.
I had no fucking idea that people like this (mad)man exist.
Almost at every lecture he was introducing at leas one topic that was way beyond our program; as he thought they were interesting and "fun".
Many teachers at the University refered to him as a very 'ambitious' man. Then I didn't blame him he truly loved his profession and wanted to share as much knowledge as possible(I thought).
But two months ago he went to far. It was a second exam(for those who failed the first one). And believe me there were a few(60 out of 160 to be exact).
Only ~30 people showed up as the rest failed to many courses and would be kicked out of the uni anyway.
He was handing out the exams when I saw that whoever gets one slowly starts turning white.
I finally got my copy and immediately I realized that the tasks are from his favorite topics, the "fun" ones. 🤦
At this point I knew that it will be extremely hard to pass. But when I was reevaluating my life choices something draw my attention.
One of the tasks had a note below it: "Homework after the exam: It is a very interesting problem just assume x instead of y and try to solve it. PS: it is a lot of fun!"
At this point I lost it.😠 I don't care how much you love math, you should always assume that not everyone loves it as much as you do. So don't push it down the throat of people who clearly don't need a degree in this subject!
Now I'm preparing for the second semester with this guy. And I have a strong feeling that it will be hell of a ride... again.😐
BTW: Sorry that the rant is so long, it's the first one I wrote, and had to share it with someone 😀19
If you didn't think NodeJS dependency hell was that bad, you should try sequentially parsing a graph that's stored as an array of nodes and their references, where processing of said nodes forces you to use some async functions that depend on other async functions.
What should have been 20 lines of code written in 30 minutes has turned into 3 hours of horror, reading about babel, realizing that it's just adding more problems without solving one, assessing the effort of modification of async libraries to include sync methods as well, trying out asyncwait, async, and everything else there is, trying to rethink the recursive algorithm, rewriting it several times, cursing and hating myself for not choosing to use Python or .NET Core, screaming senselessly at my wife in a language as familiar to her as Klingon, crying in the bathroom, re-assessing my life choices, thinking whether it was a mistake to dedicate 10 years to this career, maybe I'm just not cut out for it since I can't handle this simple task, watching noose tying tutorials on youtube, thinking about my naked empty RPI that won't connect to the server any time soon.
Seriously. Why is it SO BAD?! Or is it just me?5
When it's late at night and my wife and child have gone to bed and I pull out the laptop to start some code/specification I question my life choices.
Does anyone else wonder why they're driven to do what they do?4
As someone deeply questioning their life and career choices as of now, I wouldn't want to become a dev anymore because:
- you spend most of your time burning your eyes on a monitor and getting terrible back pain
- you might sell your soul to company benefits whose only purpose is to make you distracted from the fact that you're basically spending 1/3 of the day wishing you were doing something you actually want to do
- might have to do some exhausting communication ooga boogas to understand what supervisors and your other colleagues want to say (in a small company setting)
- again, as in my previous rant, if you're not on some less disposable dev position, you could as well become something else given that junior salaries are not that high
- get into an unhealthy work world where little hours of sleep, overworking, and other such unhealthy lifestyles are praised or used to determine your worth
Of course, these differ on a case by case basis. I'd become a train driver or something if I still didn't have to eat and not throw more money at a career change
Alright, time to do some explanation.
Q: where tf are you bruh
A: in your mo-uhhhhh alright, so I was chosen to be the main developer for an interactive promotional video for my school (every year the school holds something called an open day, where kids from 8th grade can come to the school and have a tour in the school first hand. Because of the coronavirus (just gonna call it “the rona” from here) this is now impossible so we are losing the interest and the first impressions so the school decided to make an interactive virtual one). They asked me if I want to do it and I said yes.
Boy, was that ever a mistake... (hint: it was a huge mistake)
So the guy who talked to me and asked if I wanted to do this was my grade’s manager, and he gave me the phone number of my PM. So we talked and stuff, and then this happened: (bruh = PM)
bruh: I’ll send you the API and documentation for the thing that we are working with! They have lots of examples and stuff and they’re Israeli too!
Me: Okay! What language are we talking about here?
Me: (questioning life choices) Okay!
So, what was the objective for me? Build a Firebase client that sends the user’s score and choices to Firestore after he chooses something in the interactive video (for example, go to chemistry or go to physics) while learning JavaScmeme (ECMEMEScript) as I go.
Deadline? A week and a half.
After working almost 12 hours a fucking day, I made it work. Sorta. In order to reconcile with small exceptions and edge cases in the interactive video, I had to hard-code some IDs in the code. I had no choice, since I couldn’t allow myself to spend more and more time to make my code more dynamic than it was because I simply didn’t have time. The code absolutely STINKS but it works.
Today is the day where we (aim) to finish all of the cosmetic things that we need to fix. All of them are non-essential for everything to work, but we want to make this thing presentable because we want to put this on the school’s website.
So there's this extremely cute mother cat and her kitten that are living on a small shed near my home . I used to put some catfood/ milk in some bowl whenever i passed their shed and call them. They used come down very scaree , fully ready to jump back and slowly come towards the bowl.
Awestruck me would try to move my hand towards them when they are eating, and they would quickly jump back. The kiddo would even try to hiss at me xD.
So i would just stand their fully still , occasionally trying to call them or wave my hand and at the end go back.
This has been happening for last few days. Those cute wild beasts don't want to interact with a human but their hunger is forcing them to tolerate a messy kid.
So today i went late and didn't had any cat treats on me. So i just stood their called them fondly and again tried to peacefully put forward my hand towards them. They again took a step backwards, but both mom and kiddo is hungry , and they are replying back.
So having nothing on me i sadly started going back towards my home. But to my surprise the mother cat was trying to follow me , and she was super scared. I could feel it because everytime i stopped to look back at her, she was like "keep moving forward or am running away!" . So that's what i did, she came to my door, eat some catfood and went away.
This whole incident was very cute, a scared little cat trusting a stranger . However i kind of related it to myself, and humans . Its like every creature has the same tendency to make risky choices when there is a question of life or death or food or family. And we are all shit scared , ready to run any moment away from the choice, but we still go towards that choice, in her case , following a stranger even though she knew it could be risky for her or her child's life ♥️2
Took up computer course, never used nor seen a computer in my life. Was good at written tests, now first time to use the lab and first time seeing a PC
Prof: Today you're going to create your own bootable micro floppy disk. Afterwards you're going to load it with SideKick and PC Tools. Turn on the PC in front of you and insert your double density disks as soon as you see the C: prompt
Me: my disk won't go all the way in
Classmate: just push it in until you hear a click then it will lock
Me: still won't *pushes really hard until I heard a crack... my disk was inserted the wrong way... it did lock though*
Everyone in class looks at me and I start questioning my life choices. I could've sworn our Prof's face turned white
For me there are two kinds of bugs. The ones where you lean backward and the ones where you lean forward.
If you found a bug and you lean backwards in your chair resting your hands behind your head you feel proud and relieved that you found that sneaky bastard. Good for your dev soul.
If you lean forward, resting your forehead on your fists or on the desk then it was a very stupid bug. Not sneaky at all. Something plain obvious. It makes you doubting all your career and life choices you made so far. Like needing one hour to find out that you named the "MANIFEST.in" accidentally "MAINFEST.in"...
Want to share any embarrassing bugs to make me smile again?5
If you comment your code like this, I'd like you to rethink your life choices.
This is a project we need to work on in university. The code was given to us.4
How long do my fellow devRanters spend per day coding? I will spend about 10 hours per day 6/7 days per week.
I ask this because I'm wondering if I need to re-balance my life choices. I took a whole day off
over the weekend and ended up feeling more rejuvenated coming back to my code this Monday.15
So i recently started a new Instagram account with new email ID apart from the personal Instagram account which has my friends from Facebook and even from highschool.
The new account was supposed to be a secret, part of an experiment I'm doing with my life choices. And there i only follow people that i look up to. I'm not expecting anyone from real life to follow me their and i prefer if they don't.
Nobody was supposed to know about this new account other than me. But guess what, it seems this account is being advertised to my friends from other account and some of them are following this new account. I'm 99.9% sure they are following just to get a follow back.
I'm feeling shitty about this, but i ain't gonna follow them back. If i need to see their story and photos, I'd get back on my personal account.
Guess I'll have to suck it up and be okay with fact that those "friends" will be seeing my vulnerable side.6
To the developer who was kind enough to complicate matters by using Java 8 Time and Joda Time in the same constructor. Please reconsider your life choices
You really start to question your choices in life when you can't get hired or get paid freelance work, so you apply to help (for free) on Catchafire... and get rejected.2
"When you hit 10 joins, you should contemplate your life choices. By the time you hit 15 joins, you've just entered the realm of no return." - Me when I find out that a query I've got a ticket for(because it's taking too long) has 18 joins to tables with no indexing at all.5
That moment you realize you are at the end of that period of life when you have a lot of free time...
I recently moved and live on my own. I'm still studying and I'm finding small jobs as a developer (I make the money I need to live). So far so good, but recently I found out that the career path I'm taking it's not what I actually want to do.
I do not regret it, I'm happy and I feel lucky comparing myself to others in my country.
But I can't stop thinking that the more I go on the less choices I can make freely and that growing up sucks sometimes.3
Went late in life to college.
Got my first IT Dev Job at 30
Now almost five years later, I'm depressed, realizing that I can't do this. I'm a horrible dev and not the kind of "horrible" that writes blog posts about how horrible they are while they maintain several libraries and casually make tutorials on YouTube.
I'm genuinely bad.
I tried learning and improving myself. But I'm always overwhelmed and frustrated, because there are so many things I don't understand. Learning anything takes me an incredible amount of time and then it's only on a superficial level, to the point I mostly memorise patterns but never truly understand. While others go through documentions and they understand everything, I have to find articles that explain solutions and concepts with super simple examples. Without Google I would be lost.
Online or in real life, I'm just getting baffled how poorly I compare to others.
I can't sleep, it's 3 am and I have a meeting in the morning. I still wasn't fired so far, but I should be fired. I messed up in all aspects of life, but realizing your choices were all wrong is dragging me down.3
So my friend works in this big MNC company with good pay. He has had good education and certifications. He runs into a simple issue with someone's github project he forked and calls me for me help to debug the issue. Just helped him figure out the reason for issue over the phone.
And here I am technically "jobless" and loser in my relatives eyes because I'm pursuing self employment with no cool certifications to brag about.
Not sure if I should feel stupid for the choices I made in my life.2
I don't feel ready to search for jobs. I don't feel that coding is for me.
There is this guy that wanted to study physics and changed to System Information. He is more logical and rational than me. I'm too "emotional" to code, I get stressed easily when something isn't working.
I'm doing this because I wanted to challenge and prove myself that I could be more. I could have been a teacher, but I thought that it wasn't enough for me and I wanted to go further.
Every day I'm outside of my comfort zone and I don't know where this path will lead me and I'm scared and at the same time, I'm hoping for a happy end.
Maybe my brain is not made for coding, maybe it is more on the database side. But I'm sure of one thing: this year I'll give my best and everything at my current internship to get better at coding with Android Studio, Windows Form, Angular and React. My results will determine if I''m a good fit for coding.
Remember one thing: not everyone can easily learn how to code, but you will never know if you don't try it. Go out of your comfort zone in your life and you will meet a whole new world.2
Today I've found code that was generating HTML of ```<ul><li>1. Item</li><li>2. Item</li></ul>``` and I'm seriously reconsidering all my life choices. Fortunately the guy who made this doesn't work with us anymore.6
I have just been invited to a Technical Test Server for the game I currently play most, but I have some development in progress! God my life is full of hard choices!
Spoiler: I'm playing on the TTS right now :x
So we have this project that we are hosting on our testing server for presentation purposes ( already provisioning prod server ).
Our boss was presenting it to investors and my superior committed a bug there and was asking me help to figure out how to fix it (yeah.. he doesn't know how to checkout last commits in git... fml), and I realised the presentation might still be going on... so I asked: isn't boss showing it to investors?
superior: lol, idk maybe.
me: right... ( I proceed to roll back changes ) bye, have a good lunch.
And here I am having lunch considering my life choices.
Just sharing a thought.
A and B are 2 good friends.
in the last days of their college, both of them know that after this , life is about to come for them. they would be out of the comfort bubble and into the harsh world. they have a lot of paths in front of them, and they have to make choices now.
A is a very unsure of everything:
- He likes a bunch of things in which he would want a career in , but is afraid that his choice of interest isn't too good.
- He also don't like a bunch of things that he don't want to get stuck in , but is afraid that its either too good or too bad that eventually an average guy like himself would have to end up there .
- He also got a bunch of demons in himself which are the reason for his overconfidence, doubts and maybe his average results.
- he ends up trying a lot of things, giving average results in them due to his demons and lazy nature and end up regretting every of his choice. He does gets some success at the end, but he lives a terrible, sad life
Then there is Guy B:
- He's also an average, but he don't regret his choices. He also have a bunch of demons, but makes sure to keep them in check
- He makes choices and sticks with them. He only tries a path if he feels like so, he is not easily swayed by the choices of people around him. He has some firm beliefs.
- He ends up in career path that he is fully confident of, and doesn't regrets about it in the least. He too gets success.
I assumed( and hope) that both of these guys gets success. But i am sure one was just throwing stuff on the wall thinking that something would stick, and other was sure that he has a glue in his hand and it would definitely stick(even tho it might had not been a glue).
For the first guy the success was a surprise, a miracle that he didn't even believed that he got one. But for other, it was a long due reward that he was confident would someday come up for him
The practical case is usually that the first guy never gets to enjoy success and ends up regretting( like the ending of first guy's story) and second guy not only gets the success, but get it faster than he would have though( like the end of second guy's story)5
Why the fuck nobody talks about Multi-page apps?! We went from a Web where everything was Multi-page server-rendered, and now everything for Web developers is "Single-page apps".
What about websites who can't do that? Not everything can be a single-page app. Only my uncle's restaurant website, or something which is TRULY a full app. No half choices.
If your website is a multi-page app/portal which actually PRELOADS data, instead of doing 100 fetch to an API within a page that is full of loading bars, well, your life is a pain.
When you want a first contentful paint which isn't a white page, well, your life is a pain.
What are React, Vue, Ember, Angular (let's exclude Svelte and Marko) going to do about Multi-page apps and SSR?
React-router sucks to me. It's performance is weak and it's useful only when you have an SPA with multiple sections which can be treated as pages (e.g. A single SPA divided in tabs).
Server-side rendering is the worst pain ever made by humanity, in React (and prob Vue, I didn't try but I can bet). And even when made easier from libs like Svelte and Marko, I (personally) can't get it to be faster enough compared to a traditional website without a JS framework and with a templating engine.
Anyways, if there's anything that I learnt from React, is to stay away from Next.js. Perfect, beautiful, mess.
All JS frameworks just seem to bloat the code and make it worse and slower, even though they're REALLY helpful.
Why? Why everyone loves them if their downsides are so clear? Why 3 projects out of 3 I made (1 React SSR, 1 Vue, 1 Marko SSR) are and will stay painfully slow and bloated, full of shit, even if in 2020 we should have evolved with the famous three shaking, with the famous lazy loading, etc.?
I am just frustrated.
And let's not even talk about Webpack, Rollup, Lasso, those module bundlers shit which are harder to configure and understand than finding a needle in a haystack.
Lasso was the easiest to configure but I anyways can't understand it. Webpack seems it was made to handle SPAs, as any tool in this freaking world, and not even considering an easy way to integrate multiple bundles for multiple pages (I know it's pretty easy, but with component sharing between pages and big unique bundles Next.js handles it soooo bad it feels like hell).
Am I the only one?
Sorry for the long rant. I just needed to rant right now.18
Do you think it's possible to get enough of a following on YouTube and twitch to fund your living expenses and use the rest of your free time to work on your own studio projects?
For example I'm a VR and AR game developer. I do the whole shebang for game development and design on my own. I could stream play throughs of the current game I'm working on as a weekly thing and create tutorial videos for other developers and students for more content on my channel, but to also stimulate growth in the VR and AR industry. I'd in a way be creating my own market. I could also stream the development of the art assets and whatnot.
Could possibly make some money from the ads at first. Maybe even within the game?
Idk I'm trying to avoid having to get a job anywhere else if I can float my own success as an indie start up. So thoughts on this rant please?5
There are only three dev jobs:
- Hate the job
- Feel neutral
- Love the job
Two are choices that you make because of where you are in your life. The other choice you get stuck with and only stay long enough to avoid damage to your reputation.
Baby or bills? Often the middle choice is the best choice. Dream jobs come at a massive cost and risk to your personal stability.9
40k vs 1.6m city, same pay, same position, same company - life million times more easy and much, much cheaper. Could change a flat to a huge house easily. goto or !goto8
I subscribe to many copywriting newsletters. Here's an article that shows how it's like on "the other side", marketers struggle, too.
How Kevin's Massive Mistake
Completely Changed His Life
Kevin H. made a huge mistake.
The biggest, he would say, if he could tell you himself.
And he knew it immediately.
It was, he said, "instant regret."
Within milliseconds, he was asking himself "What have I done..."
Kevin, see, had just jumped the rail of the single most popular suicide spot in the world, the Golden Gate Bridge.
On average, the site gets another distraught jumper every two weeks. Kevin was one of them.
It wasn't like he hadn't tried to quiet the voices in his head. Therapy, drugs, hospitalization.
Time to die, those voices still said.
And yet, in the minutes his bus dropped him off at the bridge, he hesitated and paced with tears in his eyes.
"I told myself if just one person comes up to me and asks if I'm okay... if one person asks if they can help... I won't do it. I'll stop and tell them my whole story..."
But nobody did, so he jumped.
It was in those next milliseconds, he would later say, he knew it was the biggest mistake of his life.
He didn't want to die.
But now, he was sure, it was too late.
From its highest point, it's a 245-foot plummet into the icy bay waters below.
Out of the 1,700 people that have jumped from the bridge since it first opened in 1937, only 25 have survived.
Kevin, against all odds, would be one of them.
He slammed into the water like hitting concrete. Three of his vertebrae instantly shattered.
When he surfaced, he couldn't hold his own head above water. But, incredibly, a sea lion kept pushing him up.
The Coast Guard soon arrived and pulled him out.
From there, he began a long recovery that required intense surgery, physical therapy, and psychiatric care.
While still under treatment, a priest urged him to give a talk to a bunch of seventh and eighth graders.
Afterward, they sent him a pile of letters, both encouraging and full of their own pained thoughts.
He also met a woman.
Today, Kevin lives in Atlanta and he's been happily married for the last 12 years.
And he tours the country, sharing his story.
So why re-tell it here?
Obviously -- I hope -- you don't get lots of copywriters looking to snuff it after a flopped headline test.
Just the same...
We've talked a lot in this space about the things one needs to get by in this biz.
My friend and colleague Joe, over at the publishing powerhouse Agora Financial, likes to list requirements.
You need intense curiosity...
You need a killer work ethic...
And you must, MUST have... resilience.
Meaning, you must have or find the capacity to bounce back from failure and flops, even huge ones.
Now, again, Kevin's story is an extreme and in this context -- I hope -- a hyperbolic example of somebody giving up. In the worst way possible.
It is also, though, a metaphor.
See, I get a lot of notes from some of you guys... and at conferences, I get to talk to a lot of people...
And I often get the sense, from some folks, that they're feeling a little more overwhelmed than they let on.
Some are just starting out, and they've got a lot on the line. For some, it's everything. And some are desperate to make it work.
Because they have to, because their pride or livelihoods or a family business is at stake, because it's a dream.
And yet, they're overwhelmed by all the tips and secrets... or by piles of confusing research or ideas...
For others, even had some success, but they're burned out, feel antiquated, or feel like "imposters" that know less than they let on, in an industry that's evolving.
To all those folks... and to you... I can only say, I've been there. And frankly, go back there now and again.
Flops happen, failures happen. And you can and will -- even years and decades into doing this -- make the wrong choices, pick the wrong projects, or botch the right ones.
The legendary Gene Schwartz put it this way, according to a quote spotted recently in fellow writer Ben Settle's e-letter...
" A very good copywriter is going to fail. If the guy doesn't fail, he's no good. He's got to fail. It hurts. But it's the only way to get the home runs the next time."
Once more, nobody -- I hope -- is taking the trials of this profession hard enough to make Kevin's choice.
And believe me, I don't mean to make light of the latter. I just want to make sure we hit this anvil with a big hammer. To drive home the point that, whatever your struggle, be it with this biz or something bigger, that you don't want to give up. Press on.
As Churchill put it, "Success, is the ability to go from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm."
Or even more succinctly when he said, "If you're going through hell, keep going."
Because it's worth it.
I finally realized that my fate has been written using a donkey's dick!!
Anything I plan or anything I even remotely think of, goes exactly sideways!! 😡1
In all fairness to macOS. To it's weird design choices, both Linux and Windows should copy way of installing most of macOS programs. Downloading and mounting .DMG file, drag & dropping the app into Applications folder and done! Life would be so much simpler with it. And yes, I know apt install/pacman -S/dpkg -i/any other package manager is quicker, but average Joe doesn't care about it!
Then again, it would create yet ANOTHER package managing method supported by two distros that no one really cares for...6
Being a native Android dev for most of my college days(yet to start a full time professional life), i often feel scared of my life choices.
Like, i chose to go into a field in which am totally on my own . Android is not a subject taught or supported by colleges, so a virtual shelter that every fresher gets, i.e that of a "he's just a college passout, he wouldn't know that" is not for me. I am supposed to be a self learner and a knowledgeable android dev by default.
Other than that , idk why i feel that am having a very specific skillset which would be harmful for me if am not the best at it.
I feel the same for entire Android dev. I mean, its nothing but a very specific hardware device with a small screen and a bunch of lmited sensors. Our tools and apps are limited to just manipulate them to do little fancy stuff offline. Other than that everything (and sometimes even this too) could be achieved by a website/webapp of a web dev.
A particular native android dev don't know how the ML/AI stuff works, don't know how backend stuff works don't know how the cloud stuff works, jeck we don't even know how those unity games work!
We are just some end product makers taking data from somewhere handled by someone and printing them in fancy gui.
(But we are good at ranting about stupid mobile hardware manufacturers, i tell u that)
So am not sure if being an Android dev is a going to be good for me in the future. I mean , a web dev always gets to interact at every level of products, but we can't.
I always feel my future will end up being limited to being good in Android, later shifting to IOS to being completely unemployed because everything is controlled by js and web dev tools and native programming is no longer a thing anymore :/4
At many phases of life, i had 3 choices : the difficult one , the average one and the wrong one.
I questioned the difficult one as it was too pointless to go on with, uncomfortable to follow and stressful to practice. Some guys chose that.
I pulled myself away from the wrong one because my parents always reminded me of the implications. Some guys still chose that
I went on with the average one because it was comfortable and cozy and didn't caused any Unknown chain of reactions. A lot of guys chose that.
The guys who chose the difficult ones became the pioneers/winners
The guys who chose wrong one became addicts and shame to society
The guys who chose the average one later chose the difficult one and became pioneer/winners
I took the average choice ,and then kept on taking the average choice and is getting the unique designation : "looser"
Must choose the difficult option next time :/14
After next 10 days i will be officially out of my student life phase and into the role of a adult, but my habits and mistakes are still that of a person i was 4 years ago. Even tody my poor decision making and practical skills are causing a pain to my loved ones , leading them to take charge, and i am so sad as to why i am the way i am. I wish i could know a way to change, to know of a way to grow.
Tldr : clg/uni fucks up with sudden notices. Immediate actions needed. My confused brain wants to react correctly and in a fail safe way,but confusion in choices leads to my old parents travelling 140kms.
(Note 12 -2 days ago is not much relevant)
12 days ago
Situation in my state/country : heavy increase in covid cases by 90k each day, yet govt opening up and judiciary allowing markets/systems to open slowly
11 days ago
Univ drops a bomb : offline college exams for final yr would be happening in next 13 days if everything goes right. We would be giving the datesheet in next 2 days.
Le students:" wtf they can't take offline exams. What's going right? Situation is wrong as always... They bluffin (goes on creating twitter wars)
Le me : yeah its just a bluff
9 days ago : *no datesheet comes* *everyone quiet thinking univ got their brains on track*
8 days ago : univ drops "proposed" datesheet. Datesheet is exactly as they said : exams starting from 22nd, continuous , offline, in the college itself , at very early time
Le students : WTF! THEY REALLY GAVE THE DATESHEET? THEY WANNA KILL US? HOW CAN WE GO BACK TO COLLEGES ?WE DON'T HAVE TRANSPORTS!!? *Angry posts everywhere, but nothing is really happening*
Le me : hmm . Looks like its really happening. No probs. We will start from this monday. I have already some prep, we also have some interviews so Monday is good.
Monday comes . Goes on doing revisions, attending some inteviews,... Etc for next 5 days. Meanwhile i inform my parents that i will be having exams next week. They too busy to pay attention. I too engrossed in my stuff to think about a very important thing : HOW WILL I FUCKING GO?
So here comes the shit story.
Some event happens that brings attention of me , parents nd everyone else to the execution of exams by us.
Here is some maths.
- Exams to start : in next 4 days
- Exam start timings : 8.30 am.
- Examination gate closing time : 8.10 am
: . need to reach college by :7.30 am
- Distance between my home and college = ~70kms
- General route + timings =metro + bus + 3 wheeler = 1.3- 1 hr 40 mins
Thus to reach college using this route, need to get out of my home by : 6am
First metro on my route : 6.20 am
MATHS DOES NOT MATCH!!! I WILL BE LATE FOR MY EXAMS plus there are many unreliability factors like the unsafe nature of buses interms of covid, traffic etc.
So needed a different plan.
So when i thought about it, i immediately came up with an alternative solution. My friend presented me an option 2 and when my parents thought about it , they came with an option 3.
But i was so confused about all the options , that parents just got frustrated and took it to their hands.
Option 1 (mine) : i go by metro till the place from where i take the bus. From their i book a direct cab to college. Cost =$$$ but i will be somewhat safe from covid. Also risk of getting late is reduced as
Parents : nope/maybe. Still too much exertion + traffic risk
Option 2(friend) : i go by metro to the place from where i tske the bus. Friend has a car, will take both of us from there
Parenst Nope/maybe : traffic risk + what if friend gets late? He will run away without u.
Me : friend is responsible.
Option 3(parents) : there's an orphanage run by a known family friend that's at 4kms from my college. Let's shift you there for next 6 days. Mom will also stay woth you there
Me : nope/maybe. Lack of basic facilities ( table, wify) there. Plus mom can't go , her business will get disrupted . Also everyone would he taking the usual route, it won't be much exertion
Parents : mom has to go.. how will we be satisfied that you are staying safely there? The aunt there won't be able to handle your requirements.
Me : I DON'T HAVE ANY REQUIREMENTS! All i need is my mobile and copies and i cans study anywhere, eat anything.. plus we don't have time for all this. I think staying there is good planz let me shift tomorrow
Parents. : No,..okay...umm.. no we have to...
<Everyone confused and mostly angry at me>
At the end they decided that i should be staying home and they would be going first there to check. I feel bad that i couldn't give them the confidence in me to take such decisions, or criticizing the only correct risk free choice they gave to me.
So, i'm starting to hate being young...
I'm 19, and have been programming for 6 years, almost half of my life, people assume that due to my young age I must be an inexperienced incompetent, shit on me for every line of code I write, insult me every time I make a sintax error...
Well, now I'm working on my own on my first big project, a videogame (it's the reason I started programming in the first place), nobody blames me for their errors, I don't have to justify mi choices to people who don't want to understand and I can stop if I have to study for university...
All of this just to say one thing, please, before blaming the kid, think what you might have done wrong!5
My area of focus? Breaking things until the work, making questionable life choices, and translating unintelligible client ideas into human readable goals that the rest of the team can understand.
On a more serious note.... Game development, mobile development, and web development (websites and apps). Typing up a bunch of what most would call gibberish and having it turn into a world is just a fantastic feeling. This can be called playing god. It's also great to send those world's to the tiny boxes in our pockets and have them work there too!
... Obviously though the key reason why is money, gotta make it to get by.
If you ever make rating request pop up when user makes something else, I SWEAR TO GEEBUS, I'll make you regret your life choices!5
Every now and then you get that error that makes you questions your life choices and how u end up here ... Then u solve it .1
To the people who changed from windows to linux and bought the new iphone; congratulations on your wonderful life choices.
I believe that there are 2 paths. Either a successful job(a really high salary) or building your own business. Which do you prefer? I prefer to have my own business.18
So today I finally lost my sanity and public'ed by somewhat Chromium OS board overlay and built on top of that already...
source here: https://github.com/sr229/maru
I need to reconsider my life choices2
I've learned more about stochastic by watching my miserable dqn , trying to determinate whether it's actually learning something or not, than in all the math classes I ever visited.
May write an epic about depths of despair next.
Probably qualified to lead humanity into battle against the machines.
Reconsidering life choices.
Decided never to have children.
I'm thinking of writting off 4 years of my life i.e 2011 - 2015 i.e my college life. The baggages from that period is the biggest distraction in my life.
I made some bad choices and chose a stream that i eventually lost interest in, while on the other hand, i found my interest in programming. It was too late for me when i find my interest.
When my course completed, i had nothing to brag or be proud about but over 15 backpapers.
Two years since then the count of my back papers is down to 1.
Having to study for these failed exams on subjects i don't care anymore makes me hate myself.
But, I'm just 1 exam away from this stupid degree.
2 uses that i see in this degree:
- can confidently add in my resume that i graduated college.
- parents can be "proud" i finally have a degree and increase my chances in finding a match in matrimony. :/
However, these 2 advantages don't align with the life i vision. I don't want to live 9 to 5 work life, I'd rather be self employed in some way.
If i don't make it in the next exam, I'm gonna write it off. I might have to live with strained relationship with my parents and relatives after that.. :/5
Did you ever feeling like you made all the right choices in life?
(At least for the big decisions)
That feeling is fucking amazing..14
That feeling when you were sick as shh and almost good now after eating good pepperoni sausages and wine, suddenly getting energy and reminiscing about : (1. Biggest priority)
1. Am I really going to play with code side project it's Saturday
2. Nah I'm still going to play Dota or wow or idk
3. Laying in bed devranting and telling to myself am I that tired and lazy to do the above ones? Nah it's just socializing
4. Laying in the bed turning the phone display down ?
Yeah tough choices probably get some wine and do some music idk man
Feel like shit, can't focus on work, exam coming up in about 2 weeks...
These stupid numerical algorithms are easy, and yet I manage to get stuck on every shitty little detail, I panic, and I completely lose focus.
This shit has been destroying my academic career... Can't focus properly anymore, cannot study even the simplest things - things that I used to do off the top of my head just a year ago.
My sleep schedule is FUBAR, it's a miracle if I manage to stick to the same timezone for three nights in a row.
Yet I'm still learning new things, trying out stuff and solving problems. Just not the ones that I need to pass my exams.
And before anyone says that university is useless and whatnot: I'm studying aerospace engineering.
I love it, I'm having great fun, learning amazing things, and I've met a lot of amazing people thanks to it. It's one of the few choices in life that I am certain of, and would gladly repeat over and over again.
I've burned myself out from stress, far harder and longer than I've ever done before, and I cannot figure out a way to recover from it.
I've been doing better in the last month or so, but I still cannot get any proper work done, and this is gonna bite me in the ass really hard, once again.
Funny story: I had 3 days of break between the end of the previous semester and the beginning of this one. 3 days of pure freedom.
In those 3 days, I spontaneously reverted to a normal sleep schedule (didn't even need an alarm clock) and felt like a mountain had been lifted off my shoulders.
A year ago I had no idea what truly panicking in the middle of an exam felt like.
My mind had never gone completely blank.
I had no idea what impaired cognitive ability felt like.
This shit is scary.
Why do our minds have to make things so complicated?
I'm a junior, now getting used to the idea of having to finish something in the same day if it's urgent for production and therefore having to clock in extra hours.
It's depressing, in a way.. I'm hoping to avoid this as much as I can and just get work done within the usual 7.5 hours.2
One day I decided I wanted to build robots.
And not kidding the reason I wanted to build them was because I wanted someone interesting to talk to and stil not kidding I even fantasized about a robot girlfriend... Lame I know I think I was a lonely little guy back then, though even after 7 years or so it doesn't feel as though it's that long ago. Maybe because things didn't change that much. Which is worrying but it's not the topic so I will pass on that future-past worries bullcrapper. After learning how robots worked and what made them function so things gradually led up to me being more interested in machine learning applications and software. I learned Arduino at first, I think I still have some messy circuits and old arduinos around. I only finished one robot though and it couldn't even support it's own weight. The servo motors were taking too many amps that heated up the little arduino even with a fan attached. Provably I should have made use of mechanics for robots books and calculated things first. But even though it couldn't walk properly I still felt success and I loved it like my own kid (me taking it apart was questionable but believe me). After that I focused more on writing code than using my hands to make things which was a pain in the ass if I might add.
After learning arduino and making that failed project of mine. I then picked up C++ wrote hello world program usual things a starter would do. It was the language I wrote my first game which I finished and this time it worked. But I never released it which was partly because I didn't want to spend a hundred bucks on a license for the engine and I also knew that it was a shit game. If I were to describe; lines in different colors come from the top you need to hit the lines with the same colored columns to break them. The columns changed their height and location on random. The lines sped up and gap between them decreased. Now that I think about it it wasn't half bad. But the code was written in game maker studio's version of C so I have no way to salvage it.
But I learned a lot of things from that project and that was the goal, so I would call it a win. I don't remember but after sometime I switched to python. And I'm glad I did, it's fun to code in which was the main reason I coded in the first place. Fun.
Life happens and time passes,
Now I'm waiting to enter college exams in a few months after hopefully passing them. My goal is to get into computer engineering which will be extremely challenging because it's the highest point department in the university I'm aiming at. But hey if the challenge is great the reward is greater right ? To be honest I'm still not sure about my career path. Too many choices. So I will just let my own road called <millions of similarly random events that are actually caused by deterministic reactions, to affect you and your surroundings leading up to a future which only the Laplace's demon can forsee> guide me. Wish me luck.1
Duh. I'm really torn right now. I'm still wasting my time in this garbage college, and my patience is sooo running out. I can easily get a job by now and actually learn things, but there's just a few months left until I graduate. The worst few months. Should I just screw it or endure a bit more? 🤔21
Does anyone else ever get really down when you spend too much time away from your project? I feel myself retracting from society and all I ever want to do is drink coffee and teach myself stuff and work on my game.
It's getting to the point where I don't even want to see my gf and I don't even think about food. I see this happening to me in real time, but I don't want to stop it because I know it's what I need to accel. It's just, damn, it all makes me kind of sad and reflective.5
When I see in a project a custom-written 96 lines long file that implements linking on a website I seriously reconsider all the life choices that led me to this point.2
Fucking hate to explain basic shit to computer illiterate. Usually I don't mind, but right know I working on the project, want to automate one thing I need to do every morning, put two numbers to web page(I will explain details maybe in next rant). So I am only one who fix, buys computers, printer(for some problems I call for other repair man.). Generally speaking working as IT guy. Firm has like 50 computers, some of them has SCADA software. Some computers have Win 7, some win 8 and others win 10, can't upgrade those computers, not enough money(I can deal with this problem). And yes, computer buying is not the fastest, easiest thing too. Because is public firm, I need to do public buying(I don't know how to translate to english), and most of the time wins the lowest price, I am ok with that. But I can't on item specification write I want that model pc or it components. Example: I can't write I want intel processor, however I can write number of cores, frequency. But it's not that bad, usually i have template for all things I buy. One of the worst thing is this, our firm bought new bookkeeping software version, old version was using visual foxpro framework. Good thing I didn't initiate the purchase, because right know I would be jobless, not because I would be fired, but because our senior accountant would drive me crazy. In fact accountants drive me crazy, but I can handle it for now. As I wrote before our form has about 120 workers, major part of workers are old, like my parents age. (I am 28 btw. Mom is 55.). As you all know what happens if you say you work with computers. So our accountants are like 60 years old, got new program, don't know how to work with it, and they ask me how to do certain things. if I don't know how to I ask program's support, every question is like 90 Eur. So in short accountants expect I should know their work and how program works. If I try say something they don't like, they try to make my day hard. Next thing is our billing program. Man that worked before me done some payments import. And when I came everyone expect me to do that. Ok I did that because that people working with billing program would probably fuck it up. And I semi automated that, so I don't mind that much. Sometimes that program fucks up, like it happened yesterday, it send email invoices attachment without filename. Example: people got this attachment ".pdf"(no filename, only extension), And if you save it you need do OPEN WITH command and then select pdf reader or rename file (I don't know what easier). And surprise surprise our firm, customer support redirects all phone calls, emails to me. But I did explain to customer support what to say to people. Still they redirect it to me.
PS: This is my first job after school. I work as part time.
TL;DR Thinking my life, carrier choices. accountants are not the nicest people.8
DevRant notifications for posts and comments that aren't even funny or creative are the only positivity these days
I'll have to make some tough choices over the next 6 months. With my tech career beginning and my college education ramping up, time is of the essence, and the skills I develop now will be at the forefront of my future. So what does this have to do with Microsoft?
Well, the story begins in the Spring of 2016. Social Forums was about to turn a year old, Trump's campaign was ramping up, and I had just found my love for technology. With all my friends having phones, I had to get a phone and get working on development. The year before, Windows 10 was launched, and I was psyched. I found Microsoft's products to be underrated with potential. That day, I purchased a Lumia 640, upgraded it to Windows 10, and immediately began working. After another year-and-a-half gone by, I went from loving Microsoft, to defending Microsoft, to tolerating Microsoft. I could go on and on about the lousy structure, the privacy issues, the forced upgrades, the redundant developer platform, and other such issues that is leading me away from them. But if there is one thing they have proven over the years, is that the they are completely out of touch with its developers and its customers. They spent years ramping up their phones. They failed. They spend years ramping up their phones. They failed. They spend years ramping up their semi-annual OS updates. They failed. So why did they fail? It's not that they made the wrong prediction out of chance. They legitimately don't care about feedback. It's their way or the highway. This sounds vaguely familiar. They have been spending a decade ignoring feedback from the community because they want to become just like Apple. Right now, Apple LIVES off of brand loyalty and its stable, useful ecosystem. This cannot work for Microsoft as they don't have a lot of brand loyalty. But most of all, they don't have a working ecosystem. They have Windows Insiders, which provides them with hundreds of feedback messages per day. These include suggestions, bug reports, and constructive criticism. The feedback is public. You can have several pages of the same complaint, and they still won't do anything about it. They say they have a good relationship with their community, and that this Beta program helps Windows become better for all. But in the end, we are nothing more than a glorified unpaid labor force. They fired hundreds of professional debuggers just before the Insider Program took off. We are only here to provide bug reports for free. Now that their phones, AR headsets, browser, online services, and VR headsets are failing for all these reasons, I see little reason to develop for Windows anymore. I don't just mean their UWP and App Store platforms, I mean Windows as a whole. I'm definitely not a Mac guy either. I never see myself going to Mac either, as they are really no different in terms of how they treat their Developers and PC users. If things continue down this route, I will leave the platform all together. I've always wanted to be a Systems Programmer, so I don't really need an established paid platform to be successful. Even now, I'm not certain about leaving Windows altogether but as a developer, I need to find my place. Time is of the essence in my life, and I need to find out my place in the software world. Now I think it isn't on the Windows platform like I had dreamed it would be. But where do I go?10
I'm going out of my f&;$)" mind trying to serve my site from digital ocean with Nginx and Node. Won't serve my page no matter what I do 😭😭😭😭
Literally been on this for 10+hours at this point.1
Is asking the question on Stack Overflow 'how to insert <script> elements from .md comments in .css files to a nuxt.js-based site' a point where I should rethink my life and code design choices? Or should I see where this insanity will lead me?3