Man I am tired of my company's dogshit software release process.

We have to commit to fucking estimates for 6 months (2 quarters), SQA shadowing dev by 2 weeks, and freaking estimates and work done at the end are not even close. And then we call it a minor release. These shitty estimates are based on requirements that basically say "we want feature x, plz make it work". It's some fucked up agilefall garbage that does not work for shit.

We rush like motherfuckers during the final weeks because estimates are bullshit but we are still expected to be done with every story points which somehow are days instead of other better metrics.

I swear this fucking bullshit has been designed by the board so they could plan their money entries based on the software release.

The only reason this company actually still holds itself up is because the engineers are good at their job.

Go fuck yourself high management.

Never trust organizations who claim to have adopted the agile mindset, saying they use SAFe or Scrum or w\e, unless the teams themselves say that they have full autonomy for the release process. Because the upper management is not agile. Especially in older organizations. Typically they are the ones who will have the final say if teams don't have autonomy.

As a consultant, I joined a team on an organization who says that they're using SAFe. "Scaled Agile Framework". There is absolutely nothing agile in that horrid process.

Agility only happens at the team level. That's where we seem to improve the ways of working. Levels above, nothing happens.

I've been on this team for a year and we haven't released ANYTHING to customers. So those "release trains" are sitting on their stations.

Upper management refuses to green light a product release to customers that doesn't contain everything they want in it. In their mind they have the "perfect product" in mind and it needs to be perfect before it can be delivered to anyone. Fighting them on that idea has proven pointless. They don't understand what an agile mindset it. At the moment we are providing zero value to customers.

The MVP release date has been pushed for over 6 months now because nobody can come to a conclusion as to what needs to be finished before the release. They can't accept that we'd just release it now and keep iterating it. Everyone from the team members to the organization leader to their grandmother has to green light a release. People argue about minor nuances. Semantics. Big manual regression tests are needed to make sure that everything works. When a minor bug appears, PO's lose their minds and start calling out developers to investigate and fix it, and to set up more gateway checks that these things don't happen.

Organizations don't adapt the agile mindset very easily. Frustration sets in. Waterfall is forever.