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Search - "roommate"
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TL;DR: I “hacked” my thermostat.
I’m stuck with an annoying roommate in college dorms who apparently always keeps the FUCKING thermostat at 80F. LIKE WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS WRONG WITH HIM. Every time I change it to like 73F, he changes it back to 80F Heat.
Getting tired of his shit for over a semester, I decided to do something about it. I looked up the thermostat made by HoneyWell and downloaded the product manual of it. Turns out, they have a system override ability to remove the heating mode and change the maximum and minimum values of temperature.
BOOM! I removed the heating mode and changed the minimum value to 70 and max to 74.
It’s 2AM here and I can finally go to sleep without sweating my balls off. I’ll keep you guys updated on his reaction hahahaha.28 -
I love listening to music and reading on the train every morning. On my way to the station, I get a text, "DUDE. ***** committed suicide."
He was a good friends of ours from high school. I remember once he got a few of us to go caving on homecoming since none of us had dates. He'd never finish a candy bar; would give half of everything away. He once drove out to California to try to start over; lasted three days and came home, but through a girl he met he was in Hawaii for a year.
He lived a lot of life, and he had a heart of gold.
I didn't get out my ebook on my phone. I didn't even put my headphones in.
I had lost another close friend from University while I was overseas. I remember being in the city art gallery when I got the news. I walked right out to the harbor, fell to my knees and cried. I always thought one day I'd be home and could shoot the shit with my old roommate. Now he was gone, and the only thing I had from him was a text from 10 days before saying, "I haven't been doing too well, but thanks for asking."
I'm back in another software engineering job, on the train to an 8-to-5, shakin it for the money. I couldn't read on the commute. I just looked out that window as the train car descended into the subway, and thought to myself, "What am I even doing anyway?"
I'm in my mid-30s; too young to be losing people like this.
I'm sorry man. I wish we had caught up sooner. I wish you weren't gone, but I know you're at peace.23 -
My roommate was sleep talking last night. She said: "It doesn't work!"
I wonder if she was debugging in her sleep...4 -
Sitting in a dorm, chilling..
My new roommate: So You study Computer Science?
Me: *Here it goes again*
Roommate: Can you fix my HDD? Something is wrong with it..
Me: No...
Roommate: But..
Me: No I study computer SCIENCE! Go ask yout physics professor to fix your fucking trebuchet, because he knows how that stuff works..
Roommate: *Silence*
God... That was my best reply in whole life... Someone should make a shirt of that...23 -
So, i tried to demonstrate my roommate how many people push their credentials to github by searching for "password remove" commits.
I decided to show him the file and noticed something interesting. A public IP, and mysql credentials.
I visit the IP and what do i see there, a directory listening with a python script, with injects the database into a webpage (???) and a log of all http requests. Lots of failed attacks aiming at the PHP CGI. Still wondering how they failed on a python server 🤔🤔🤔
Edit phpmyadmin to connect to the mysql database. Success.
Inserted a row telling him the his password is on github. Maybe i should also have told him how to actually remove it. 😅
Yes, root can login from %
This is how far i can get with my current abilities.
------------------------------
Scary how insecure this world is.4 -
I'm moving to a new place soon meaning that I'll have to get a new desk/chair. (current ones suck)
I need a good one of both but I'm not rich so was looking for more cheap options.
The guy next to me is moving out soon as well appearantly and he came to me and another roommate like "hey I'm going to buy everything new, fresh start! If you guys would like to have anything, let me know!"
Me: also a desk/chair by any chance?
Guy: yup, take a look :)
*takes a look*
Me: the damn they look very good! Are you sure you want to get rid of them? I'd think they cost quite some money.
Guy: yeah, you can also have the couch table/clothing closet if you'd like! (all designer/quality stuffs)
😍7 -
Roommate: I thought you aren't into social media...
Me: This is devRant, it's different.
Roommate: How so.
Me: It's for like minds, very well structured and has this fun feature which let's me create myself as a cartoon for my profile pic.
Next Day..........…......……
Me: (walks into the room) Why are you laughing and why are you using my phone.
Roommate: I THINK I LOVE THIS APP. I might actually download it.
Note: Roommate is a musician who studied CS in school.7 -
My roommate use torrent to download games,movies and series on an 8mb connection 24/7 even when he's sleeping. I a lot of times asked him nicely not to do that while I'm working or use speed limiter so it won't cause any problem for us, once in a while is okay but not every day. But people like him don't listen.
>Now i just disabled utorrent port associated with his IP every time he goes out or go to sleep. That what you get from being a self servings duche bag5 -
A roommate said he didnt have internet on his laptop. Wifi wasnt working for him and the cable doesnt fit because he has a new ethernet port and needs another cable for that.
I told him that there is no new ethernet port or new ethernet port standard, I would have heard about it.
But he insisted that it was true.
So I grabbed the ethernet cable, pulled the clamp on his ethernet port down (as most new laptops now have) and plugged the cable in.3 -
"Holy mother of fuck. This shit is soooo interesting."
- My roommate after I taught him basics of programming. May the main() be with him.12 -
First Post!
I am a student who is just starting out in cs and web design. I don't really like web design that much and don't see a future for myself but I run a small website for fun.
Whenever and I mean whenever I show my roommate or friends a side project hosted on the site I get a 8 minute long speech about how an aspect of my design is flawed, how my color scheme is trash, and how I should do X thing instead. Whenever I argue and say that I like my design I'm met with "I'm the end user and the user is always right"9 -
So, this dumb roommate of mine (graduated in CS) comes one day and says..
"Ruby on Rails was developed for the railways!"
And he was serious not joking. Fking serious!
I almost burst my brain nerve laughing that day!! 😂
P.s. I'm changing roommates this session.14 -
Roommate: "Hey, man, uh, I know you use computers a lot or something; do you know off the top of your head how to use the touch screen on my computer?"
Me: "Uh, your laptop doesn't have a touch screen."
Roommate: "Yeah, but I thought you might know how to use it as a touchscreen."
Me: "...Your laptop does not have a touch screen."
I swear, this is the dumbest man I have ever come into contact with.
That'd be fine if this was a one-off type of thing, but he seriously has approx. 209.8 brain cells in total.
Once, with no argumentative basis, he told me that, if Mickey Mouse got enough votes as a write-in candidate, he could win the Presidency of the United States. I showed him Article II of our Constitution, and he said "why does that even matter here?"
Three more months, school'll be done, and I never have to see him again.7 -
I was learning about packets and I was trying pirni (like Wireshark for iPhone) on my local network. I found a packet of my my roommate about a recipe of fancy a fancy dish
me: *enters the kitchen* Bro you need to see this I got this sick recipe of $fancyDish that I really wanna try
le roommate: THERES NO WAY ARE YOU FREAKING KINDING
I know its wrong to spy on peoples trafic but it was worth it hahaha7 -
he might be one of us.
full video (James Veitch Is A Terrible Roommate - CONAN on TBS) can be seen on youtube
- http://ow.ly/fr8R30gOfUs7 -
FUCK OFF!! JUST. FUCK. OFF.
I've been studying for around 4 hours and my roommate just asked me "why do you take so much time to study? Reading through it twice should be more than enough"
Simply reading trough it twice he said. MOTHERFUCK I'M NOT EVEN DONE READING THIS SHIT, THAT I'LL NEVER APPLY IRL, ONCE AND I AM NOT A KIND OF GENIUS THAT REMEMBERS EVERY DAMN DATA OK BY READING SHIT TWICE LIKE YOU. PUT YOURSELF IN MY DAMN POSITION YOU INSENSITIVE FUCK4 -
Had a tinder "date" last night. Shit was just awkward the entire time. She lives right over a state border, and I live right on the other side, so it was maybe a 10 minute drive. Plus she had a bunny, so that was pretty cool.
She said she wasn't interested in a hookup or anything, which I was fine with, sex isn't everything. We saw the bunny for a bit, then she started talking about her abusive ex boyfriend she was with for like 2 years (she did not shut the fuck up about it).
She lives in a fairly sketchy place too, so that didn't help the situation. At one point, a car drives by and shined a flashlight through the window I was sitting by. The flashlight was turned off right after that. Then she continued talking about her ex boyfriend.
I held through for 3 hours of that shit. It was the most uncomfortable I have ever been in my life. Eventually she said her friend texted her about having boyfriend issues and invited herself over to stay the night there, so she basically said "you might as well go, I don't think you want to deal with a crying 16 year old"
So I went to my car and left. I drove as fast as I could back to my apartment. Then I was telling my roommate about it, and he was like "I think you need some alcohol after that shit", so I took a couple shots of vodka.
Shit was fucking weird guys.7 -
roommate: lets start a startup!
me: sure, what do you have in mind?
roommate: nothing, I need a team first.
oh come on!1 -
This is what my roommate got handed to him at a lecture. Completely written in Comic Sans, everything is in fucking comic sans and it is not a joke! 🤣18
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When I was in college in 1996, one of my roommates had a “Web 101” class. At that same time, the office of a government agency I was working for had asked me to publish a website to let the public know what they were doing. Prior to that I had bought an HTML 1.0 reference and had been fiddling around with some things. I got excited about it all when I realized that just within 2 weeks of using the book I had passed up the entire class my roommate was taking and apparently knew more at that point than the professor. I published the agency site, then went on to build sites for the Uni and freelance clients, and then to apply to teach a more advanced class in the Continuing Education courses the Uni offered to adults in the community. All of that got me a job at a startup which led to the rest of my career. That was pretty dang exciting to me.1
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A minute of middle-fingered-silence to those fuckers who buy expensive high end machines and play finch stupid video games like counter strike and all and fucking don't let their roommate sleep!!!!
Fuck you roommate!!
Fuck steam.18 -
Some days before my graduation me and my roommate were invited for an interview. We arrived at mutually agreed time.
The interviewer asked nothing about our coding knowledge. just some personal questions. after a brief conversation he started to explain the job responsibility to us. It seemed we were both hired. We were happy that we are getting full time jobs before graduation. And then he asked us if we can commit to stay in the company for year. We both agreed if the terms are good.
After that he tried to hire us for
$125 USD per month.
we did not spent another minute bargaining with him. We just left saying that we will let you know.
We were shocked.8 -
Not really hacking, but my roommate says otherwise. So we share a router in the apartment and I’m the only one that really knows how to access it, so of course I change the password and tell no one (not like they’ll try to get in anyway).
Occasionally set roommate likes to get blackout and play music very loud at 2am. To be petty, on those occasions I set up an RPi Zero to connect to the WiFi, restart it, and sleep for a minute, and repeat. He’s still convinced we are getting DDOSd, and suspects nothing.
Reason I don’t just set parental controls - he gets more frustrated when the WiFi appears for 10secs, the music is just about to start and shuts off again. So he gives up quicker. Otherwise, he resets the router and I have to set up everything from the start.3 -
NUKE IT FROM ORBIT. It was when i was doing an assignment with my roommate, i was compiling something on my pi and ran netstat afterwards for no reason. I had an ssh-connection from china (logged in too). The pi was shutdown ASAP, i salvaged everything i needed from the sd and dd'ed raspbian on the disk again.
Turns out you were able to login via root (i thought i disabled it) with the password i set (root...). I learned from this, now external logins are only allowed via private key and i have fail2ban set up3 -
Roommate: Filter it, would you please? (* Was talking about the tea*).
Me: Alright buddy, say no more. (*Names the signal that I was working on as "Tea".*)
(*Got the filtered output 😎*)3 -
My roommate: why do you look so mad.
Me: stupid program is broke
My roommate: didn't you fix it yesterday?
Me: yes. I broke some thing else
Roommate: oh on a different project?
Me: nope same one.
Roommate: [walks away more confused than when the conversation started]1 -
“Dear Manager, the reason I didn’t complete my sprint task today was that while I was nursing my fiancé’s COVID vaccine severe side effects, said fiancé’s Chinese roommate put a jar of some fermented product called “Golden Smell” in a precarious place from which I broke it, causing a veritable golden shower of glass shards and odors to permeate the workspace. If you don’t hear from me by standup, tell my mom i’m sorry."4
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It's fucking annoying when your roommate feels the need to play their music so loudly you can hear it through the walls. That's not fucking necessary... I listen to music all the time without it being that loud. And if I want loud music, I do the polite thing of putting my headphones in. This shit didn't bother me early on, but it's getting on my last fucking nerves these days.
I'm trying to do homework and can barely focus because of the constant sound of bass non-stop.6 -
My roommate is a damn wannabe programmer: he keeps talking about how much he’s passionate into technology, buying hardware, spending hours into arranging his workstation to be as “cool looking” as possible, talking about future big projects, he even wants the fucking Java and Arduino logos embroidered in his backpack the only issues are that I’ve never seen him spending time in a project which going beyond literal hello world and if I offer him help to help and improve (I’m an employed programmer) he refuses because he’s tired/lacks time (but always make it for Netflix). I’d be still ok with that because I believe in living and letting live but now every time he starts to bore me with his lengthy stories about projects he’ll never do I imagine him with a big clown nose 🤡8
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Last week my university decided to give away old hardware to students (CPUs, displays, keyboard, mouse, speakers, printers etc.). My roommate got me this beast. I was so excited and decided to boot it up only see to GRUB error 22 :( I think the hard drives were wiped before handing it out.
I've never set up a server before and I've been trying to boot up an Ubuntu server via USB drive but it's not detecting the OS installation files. I've been searching all around to make this work but it's not fucking working. I don't have any other cables or CD drive to try something else. I want to make this work. I have exams next week and I can't stop thinking about this. Godammit8 -
Have been using python for a long time. Can't help roommate with a C project because my brain automatically filters out semicolons!!😢3
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Seasonal depression is starting to kick in. I'm feeling like I'm not doing good, whenever I ask for help with code people usually just rewrite all of it when they fix it so I feel like I'm not improving at all. I'm almost to the point in my life where I have to move out and be on my own I'm 19 I still have about 2 more years but it's so stressful. My room is the most comfy place for me I cant be away too long or I'll just get depressed so how am i supposed to find somewhere i like more? And what would I even use the other rooms for. I want a roommate (particularly a friend of mine) but I'm not even out there and I can see the future depression I'm gettin myself into with all the Bill's and jobs and shit, and college doesnt help with stress or depression at all. I probably shouldnt worry about that right now but i just cant help it.. it goes by too fast fuck.
Sorry guys this is the only real outlet for my feelings nowadays6 -
Story Time.
I was hanging around at a friend's place when she informed me that her roommate is throwing a really lavish party 50kms away from the city. I got invited by said roommate and I agreed to go.
When we arrived at the venue, there were like 100+ people at this place, all smoking weed drinking and dancing in loud music. I was also stoned at that point.
So at one point, my friend abandoned me and I found myself talking to 10 complete strangers. I realized that I was on my own and thought about seeing how much rizz I got.
Mind you that everyone was drunk and there was loud music everywhere so there was no way anyone else knew that I was getting shot down lol.
After couple rejections, I straight up went to a girl and said "You want to smoke weed and make out in the bathroom?" And to my surprise, she said yes. So, we both already high and drunk slipped into the bathroom and made out for like 10 mins and I smoked all my weed with her.
Then, at some other point, my friend showed up and we went home. The one thing I missed, was asking for her number, which I kicked myself later for. I guess stoners don't realize they have phones.4 -
!Rant
I'm going to be teaching my roommate how to "code" soon. Or rather, I'll be teaching her how to use Scratch, so she can have a leg up when she applies to work at a children's code academy that uses a Scratch-like environment. Should be fun!
I love that Scratch exists. Such an accessible way to teach basic concepts like loops, conditional statements, etc, with results that are way more fun than "oh look I output the fibinacci sequence"1 -
Living in student accomondation :
Me doing whatever on my Laptop (coding, YouTube ...) minding my own business enjoying silence or music or whatever...
EVERY FUCKING TIME I GET TO GET COMFY, MY STUPID FUCKING ROOMMATE DECIDES TO COME IN, LAUGH LIKE A DUMB FUCKING IDIOT AND EITHER STAYS FOR X MINUTES WATCHING OVER MY SHOULDER AND IS EITHER CRITICIZING MY CODING OR STARTS WATCHING THE VIDEO SITTING NEXT TO ME LAUGHING LIKE A DUMB FUCK.
He does that at least 3 times a day, while he should be studying himself(He almost failed all of His CS classes and does not even know how to create a fucking constructor in Java).
MOTHERFUCKER, GO AND LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE.
MIND YOUR OWN FUCKING BUSINESS
Had to get that off my Christ :)
PS : told him multiple Times to fuck off. If i go and sit somewhere else (like library or somewhere) dumbfuck just follows me.
FUCK HIS LAUGH, SOMEBODY CUT HIS TOE OFF PLEASE.
Cant even change Apartment as accomondation ist completely full :)3 -
So, I've come to hate Sundays. You might ask me, why? Why Sunday of all days? The answer is very simple: My wont-shut-her-fucking-mouth roommate.
Woman should be a commentator at sport events. She woke up at 10 in the morning and has been talking to what seems like the entire fucking population of this goddamn world, it's going to be 10 in the night soon. I feel like I am staying as a leech so I have no say in this goddamn room.
Please someone help me design a fucking signal jammer so I can block out the signals to shut her up!
Kill me now!
FML7 -
Fucking roommate just closed my fucking laptop while I wasn't looking. I fucking told him that I am the downloading the oversized android sdk and I also once told him that my laptop isn't completely configured yet and turns off when closed. Now I can restart the whole fucking download because android studio is also a piece of shit that doesn't know what it already downloaded.
"Sorry, I forgot that your laptop did that". Yeah, let me just slit open your fucking neck. Sorry, I forgot that kills people.2 -
Fuck this shit! Roommate just barged in at 3:30AM, his gf in tow. They went to bed like I am not here and he is snoring like a chainsaw. I never understood how can she sleep next to him while he snores like that. I have earplugs and active noise cancelling headphones on. I can still hear that motherfucker loud and clear. How the fuck is she not awake?!
But more importantly, 50% of this fucking room is mine, what makes him think he can just have his girlfriend over while I am here is beyond me. Like, sure, if I am not here go ahead but when I am here I would like some privacy, I guess the plank wall that I made in the middle of the room is not an obvious enough clue that I want privacy and I don't want to be disturbed :-/
Can't wait to have enough proof of his bullshit to get the block manager to throw him out.
Edit: To add to the snoring problem: I had a girlfriend who would snore, less than my roommate but still loud enough that I was awake the whole night when I went to sleep at her place... I HATE SNORING ... And when I went home for some holidays and my brother snored even for a second I kicked him off of his bed (because why not, he is an asshole to me like 99% of the time - and so am I to him :D //sibling love//)12 -
I really gotta stop accepting food from other people
my birthday was the other day and my roommate wanted to get me something special to eat for free
I said I keep dreaming of the samosa salad from Indian places he would get and I would keep stealing a spoon full of to try (this was after I got sick and insensitive to food so I was cautious)
he insisted it was from this fast food place... that's weird. I don't think it was. he insists all Indian places have it on their menu but he just didn't know. and he was getting this fast food's place one and that's the one I liked. ok. I consent.
I go running, come back, shower, hungry and food arrived, so I scuff down half the samosa salad thing
now I feel like trash
and it tastes nothing like it
it has fucking BBQ sauce in it. no yogurt. it's supposed to be Indian. what the fuck, sweet-ass bqq sauce? the spiciness is some retarded white people taste. this isn't the punch of Indian food.
30% of the mass is cucumber. wat. there's fucking pomegranate seeds in it so you can't even chew it. what am I even eating. the samosa pieces are all soggy and not crunchy like I remember. the spiciness sucks. there's no yogurt to counteract it either. just pathetic
and now I feel like garbage. I feel sick to my stomach. because that BBQ sauce was a lot more sugar than you could taste.
I fucking hate my life. I hope I don't get sick from the food, cuz I have food insensitivities... and I knew before when I took spoonfuls of what he ordered they didn't effect me... but that wasn't this.
this fucker literally lied and used me to order food guilt-free under the pretense of "hey it's your birthday and I wanna get you a meal". and he orders disgusting fast food that isn't even food. "for me". while lying to me. me who can't even eat the damned cherries I love without my brain degrading because those are too much sugar. what the hell is wrong with this guy
I know I got downvoted for this before but fuck I hate fat people. I don't want to eat fast food. I want real food. I don't want to get sick off fake fucking BBQ sauce infused with disgusting sugar. all this guy does is make excuses for the food he wants to eat. maybe I'm just literally food insensitive watching him eat himself to death I don't know. I feel like puking
I swear nothing good anyone ever does for you is ever for you. people are rotten.40 -
I had my presentation early morning, it was 3am, and I was still up because the code was not compiling. Then showed up my roommate who had gone for party. Can't believe that he was the one, in the half drunk state, was able to find just a short typo,but not ME, EVEN THOUGH I HAD 3 CUPS OF COFFEE the same night. Lesson learned. Patience is a virtue. Blessed to have a nice roommate. :)
PS. It was a Matlab code for filtering the mentioned portion of an ECG Signal, and analysing the problem faced by the patient. Well, I was pretty sure to get arrhythmia if I couldn't complete the code by morning. -
So my annoying roommate, an upcoming musician & I got into an argument, and although that happens quite often, today was different.
We were talking about 💰, and he said "money is everyone's motivation". I completely disagreed and now I'm bringing it to my fellow ranter's.
I know it's 'a motivation' but is it that big of one?5 -
It's been a long time since I last posted, I saw it as a good thing - I hadn't had stuff to complain about.
Until my fucking idiot mush-for-brains asswipe roommate locked me out of my own apartment!
Fucker is squatting with me, and while I'm away for work, decides it would be a great idea to change the locks and conveniently forget to mention it.
It's taking a lot of energy not kicking him out.1 -
Best conversation with non tech roommate ever:
Me: hey roomie, implement an algorithm to determine if a string has all unique characters
Roommate: like a string of code or a string of yarn?2 -
My roommate is a hardcore apple fan boy. Me and my other roommate use windows so we actually installed windows on his Mac.
He later passed out.........
1 like = 1 prayer.9 -
!rant && story
tl;dr I lost my path, learned to a lot about linux and found true love.
So because of the recent news about wpa2, I thought about learning to do some things network penetration with kali. My roommate and I took an old 8gb usb and turned it into a bootable usb with persistent storage. Maybe not the best choice, but atleast we know how to do that now.
Anyway, we started with a kali.iso from 2015, because we thought it would be faster than downloading it with a 150kpbs connection. Learned a lot from that mistake while waiting apt-get update/upgrade.
Next day I got access to some faster connection, downloaded a new release build and put the 2015 version out it's misery. Finally some signs of progress. But that was not enough. We wanted more. We (well atleast I) wanted to try i3, because one of my friends showed me to /r/unixporn (btw, pornhub is deprecated now). So after researching what i3 is, what a wm is AND what a dm is, we replaced gdm3 with lightdm and set i3 as standard wm. With the user guide on an other screen we started playing with i3. Apparently heaven is written with two characters only. Now I want to free myself from windows and have linux (Maybe arch) as my main system, but for now we continue to use thus kali usb to learn about how to set uo a nice desktop environment. Wait, why did we choose to install kali? 😂
I feel kinda sorry for that, but I want to experiment on there before until I feel confident. (Please hit me up with tips about i3)
Still gotta use Windows as a subsystem for gaming. 😥3 -
As usual before sleeping i set a timer for shutdown cuz i use my hotspot to surf devrant in bed before sleeping.
My roommate( lets call him AB) sees me writing the command.
AB: what are you doing?
Me: setting a timer to shutdown my computer.
AB: oh nice i want that too... is it just a linux thing?
Me: nope u can do it on windows.. just search the cmd command on google and u are good to go.
AB: you do it. You search.
Me: huh? Why would i do that? Bitch it is simple just google "cmd command shutdown timer" and open the first result.
AB: *extremely dissapointed face and starts searching* i dont understand anything.
Me: AB! The instructions literally explain everything! I can see!!
AB: you are good at computers, u are a computer engineer (im just a second year student)
Me: fuck off *i go to sleep*
Next day i learned that he did it after i left him, and that it did shutdown but he wasnt done with his work and he was too lazy to google how to cancel it.... JUST GOOGLE DAMMIT!!! -
Shit bathed and stack smashing ass loads of fuck.
I wrote a virtual machine, and just to fuck myself harder, I make the decision of applying some fancy dumbass theories of mine. This translates to a piece of shit modular design that works exactly as intended, but constantly gives me vietnam flashbacks to the horrifying, multiple concurrent instances of my younger mind being incessantly turbo-raped by the dozen object-obsessed pedophiles that I initially studied under.
Now, were they *actual* pedophiles? No, of course not. But I have to make fun of the acronym somehow and that's what came to mind, leaking horse dung all over the walls, floor, curtains and carpets.
Anyway, I feel so smart after this traumatic experience I just have to keep doing it to relive the terror once again. Find me in the corner, laying down in the fetal position, sobbing until the tears build up and drown me in this well of despair, or rather this finely shit painted portrait of a toilet in a lonely and stinking unisex public bathroom stall.
But let me squeeze these fucking tits a little bit harder, because that's my actual day job. That's right. I get PAID for slapping around mammary glands, it's not much but it's an honest living.
So where was I? Ah, yes, absolute degeneration. I'm truly the Max Wright of programming, mostly for smoking crack and having unprotected sex with homeless people, but also for keeping alien life forms in my basement that go out at night to hunt for sweet feline delight.
But as I keep going, I decide I want a language for the machine so I don't have to punch bits by hand all fucking day like an idiot, so alright let's make a small assembler for this shit... oh, right, except it's not small, because gently suckle the bile out the lips of my fucking butthole.
I may redefine a load of shit two months down the line, so I have to make everything perfectly encapsulated and easily fucked with -- which in my licking vomit off the floor of a porn theater travesty of a case means I'm generating half the code and scrambling as hard as I can to glue everything together.
Does it work? Of course it works, I'm Max Wright bitch. I can redefine the ISA all I want, anytime I want without breaking anything because of my pristine crackhead encapsulation. And to credit the scrambled eggs I have for fucking brains, it's not even *that* complex.
The problem is I keep forgetting shit, not how it works, just that it's there. So I forget that I have a virtual machine, and I forget that I have an assembler, and so I spend an entire day trying to figure out how the fuck I'm going to handle a loop inside an unrelated interpreter.
By the time I manage to remind the drooling undead jackass that is this husk that my irredeemably demonic self inhabits, that we can easily solve this by using the tools we've already built, it's so late and we're so tired there's not much we can do. All this time, WASTED.
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For some reason, my roommate thinks Facebook can track his and all our calls.
I don't know the beginning or the end of what they can/can't do, but that just has to be BS... right?12 -
sunny day, put plants outside
cleaned under plants... then dusted... I had no energy when I woke up but evidently somehow I'm doing spring cleaning. I'm only halfway done, if that
the kitchen lightbulb burnt out today coincidentally. asked roommate if we had extra. he said no, but strangely said he'd go buy and replace it. whoa. we have several dead light bulbs and he hasn't replaced them in years. he actually replaced them all today... very weird
anyway, the one in the kitchen is bright blue now. it seems like all the nightlights in the kitchen are also now permanently on because of it. I do not know if I like this2 -
It was my Java teacher's last semester before he bailed to a different school.
All the machines had different versions of needed software or just didn't have them at all. He would try to teach like we all had it and we should just take notes because installing would take too long.
He would rapid fire different technologies and then drop them lie flies, so we learned nothing about any of them.
At the end of the semester, almost nothing had been graded (my roommate never even knew his final grade, last he saw it was a '*')
He assigned the final exam project on Thursday afternoon of the last week of school, and it required every technology he thought he used in the course.
I came out with a D, somehow, couldn't ask why because he left already. A lot of people had D's or worse, but it was what they needed in order to move on or graduate or whatever so there wasn't enough of a group to get it corrected by student affairs.
Fun times.1 -
tl;dr never heard about rubber duck debugging before devrant
i didnt worked with Yii fw in the past but we bouth a site written in Yii and i wanted to add a form but could not pass the model to the view so i went for a smoke with my roommate to think about it
"i have the view, i have the model, the action but dont know how to pass the model variable because its an existing view..."
"...it should be passed to the render function in the existing index action but thats written somewhere else, so if i could pass it there..."
"...i can write the action there and then i should pass the variable to the render function in the index action and goddamit, so thats how you do it, thanks mate!"
he stared at me like wtf? o.O
room mate debugging ftw!1 -
Never got one as is, but went so close to it than I could smell the smell of death out if it.
Short story: it's due to my hate of Drupal 8, but I just don't know if I was badly introduced to it through a car wreck of a project or if I simply just hate it and it's insanly hard way to do simple stuff.
In November I went to the point where development was no longer a pleasure, and I was doing lots and lots of small mistakes that almost got my ass fired (made a rant about it). Nothing was enjoyable, I stop going to the gym, ate badly, saw no one excepted my roommate...
The day they switched me to write test scenarios with Behat, the sun started to shine again. Now that I'm back on Drupal knowing all this, I know that I'll have to leave the company once I have my diploma, because there's no point to stay in a place doing something you don't enjoy while you get tons of job proposals on LinkedIn
To all the people who are deep down in it: stay strong, save your ass as soon as possible and find something else, but keep some time to heal. -
today is such a good day I'm literally paranoid that something is about to go wrong
and this will maintain for like 4-5 days because my roommate left and the weather is amazing, both cool and sunny
nothing is blowing up, my health is maintaining, I just hauled 5 kg of potatoes several miles and it made me feel great, then accidentally made too much food but easily ate all of it. hell yeah
my plants are thriving, I already collected seeds for next year, and new flowers are budding and such
and I keep redesigning and making headway in my evil villain plan
and investments are doing nicely
and I have everything scheduled and done for the next half-month
about the only thing that isn't done is laundry. it's actually bugging me but who does laundry before a heatwave instead of at the end of one
am I gonna fixate on this now just to ruin my mood
hope not, fuck2 -
Everyone seems to enjoy posting their debuggers so meet the team:
Slash, Classic Duck, Varys, and a Son of the Harpy repainted to look like my D&D character courtesy of my roommate1 -
There are some who view software as a social construct (like Pieter Hientjes), and I think it's a valuable perspective. So if we know about the intrinsic brokenness of software, can we deduce sth about the brokenness of human interactions? Did social API's evolve to similar clusterfucks of dead entropy we have to shovel in our brains to get along?
I think the answer is an emphatic yes. And you know what's even making it worse? Software. Y'know there are all these whining about the millenials, and I too have had my experiences with stuff of that category. Like back when we searched a new roommate for our flat, we needed three rounds because people who had said yes suddenly reconsidered. Similarly now when we tried to sell our couch: people tried to push the price. Said they were interested, never showed up at the appointed time. It's like they have been spoiled by Amazon: expecting to buy with one click, for the cheapest price and send back if they don't like. And that is not a generation thing. Those old blokes ranting on the young are just as bad. They are just as lost in antisocial media as anybody else. It's a general erosion of not sticking to civility and courtesy, to the yes or no once said, coz everything is now as flexible and fluid as the digital projections of ourselves transmitted round the globe, changing in realtime.
I fucking hate it. - I'm out like this stupid Tom Cruise character in Oblivion.6 -
Open layout offices promotes collaboration, just look at the roommate full of people with headphones on.1
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The problem about being a programmer:
My roommate: "Bro if you're going to the market buy 1 bottle of milk. If they have eggs, bring 6."
I came back with 6 bottles of milk.
Roommate:" Wtf man. Why did you buy 6 bottles of milk."
.
.
.
Well fuck.
:/1 -
Fucking hell! I'm trying to sit down and learn LaTeX so I can take notes with math formulas in the notes. Between work, random bullshit, crappy roommate drama, cats with the zoomies, and the kiddo going nuts wanting to play I just can't catch a fucking break to studying.
I'm torn between drinking a cup of coffee at 10pm to be able to get a chance to study or being able to sleep tonight...
However in the hell did I convince myself that going back to school at 30 would work better than when I was 19-20?!? (I'm still only 29 but shit I loose steam quickly these days 😰)
Lol I'll update the rant here if I drink that cup of 10pm joe!4 -
if you're having funner you're winning, son 😏
browsed through somewhere people were confessing things about their life. the community there is about something else so it's an interesting peek to who is there and how they are as people outside that area. man some depressing shit, or plain vile shit, evil shit
people have hope for the best for themselves and it doesn't work so they go crazy sometimes
some in there thought if they stayed there and toughed it out and were "successful" they would feel better. they didn't. I see that so much in the comments. people thinking if only they were successful they would feel better, but their problems have nothing to do with their level of success. it's strange humans do this
somehow every time I see depression I get happy
life will roll you, but are you having fun, son?
the more pain you see, the more you understand
so let's make talking about pain illegal
earlier I found out the first time my roommate realized if you pushed your body you eventually can't feel how tough it is to move it was when he was in his mid 20s on a college field trip... really wtf?
I walked a few miles to a far away grocery store to buy potatoes and hauled a couple bags home today. last time I did this I felt great after, which is what spurred the earlier conversation cuz I was telling him I was gonna go do it again.
well when I got back... he was doing dishes and literally crying... and he doesn't do dishes... because it's too physically tough for him to do his own dishes... so I guess knowing I was gonna do this walk with several kgs of potatoes he decided to try it out...
I told him the difference is maybe cuz since ever I could remember, my mom had taken me on errands with her like pre me being 3 years old, and we'd walk like 6-8 hours so I had learned real quick if you just power through physically you eventually feel nothing and can do it all day long
how could a dude not know that until he's in his 20s lol
so much of life is just like this though. it's funny. nothing real is spoken, nobody does anything, nothing ever happens. there's even war tourism people complaining current wars are too boring
but are you having fun, son?7 -
My roommate apparently discovered the magic of Wordpress. So much bashing to the desh I haven't heard for a while.
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Shot scared if my roommate brought in some corona.
He had few coughs and seems to have caught cold.6 -
Any ideas for programming related Christmas presents for roommate?
I was thinking Java coffee mug or a binary clock.
Any ideas?1 -
I wonder sometimes is maybe management just like. Forgot that I'm my partner's primary transportation or something. I cannot imagine how else they would have approved putting them on a 4p-1a shift where they are alone and have no other transportation options save for me, their roommate who has to be up at 6a M-F, or walking home. But like it's 1a and actually freezing outside, so...
I dunno, maybe it's the sleep-deprivation, but it seems to me like they didn't think very hard about this, despite being made well aware a month or better in advance, and clearly understanding it then since HR had me take them for their drug test just before they were hired on because they didn't have another available ride.
But, then too, this is the same management and HR that left my partner without "official" access to clean drinking water or a working bathroom for almost 3 weeks because they delayed getting them a door code, so I'm not sure what I expected, exactly 😒4 -
Learned HTML in 7th from my sister's web designing book(she was doing some course from institute), then in 10 class met with C++, Sql because they were in the course, in college first year met with PHP as my roommate was searching how to do phishing attack, then met C++ and after that Java, Javascrip, Android development, Javascript and many more all because of various projects i did.... glad that i took those projects. 😊
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I can work productively and for very long hours with a lot of stuff which many dev considers productivity hurdles:
- single small monitor? No problem (in fact in one occasion in which my roommate accidentally broke my laptop charghing port and I couldn't get a spare I worked on an iPad connected trough SSH to a Linux machine completing one of the hardest tasks I ever did without significant loss of productivity)
- old machine? That's ok as long as I can run a minimal Linux and not struggle with Windows
- noise and chatter around me? A 10€ pair of earbuds are enough for me, no noise cancelling needed
- "legacy" stack/programming language? I'd rather spend my days coding in Swift or Rust but in the end I believe which is the dev and its skill which gets the job done not fancy language features so Java 8 will be fine
- no JetBrains or other fancy IDE? Altough some refactoring and code generation stuff is amazing Neovim or VS Code, maybe with the help of some UNIX CLI tools here and there are more than enough
despite this I found out there is a single thing which is like kryptonite for my productivity bringing it from above average* to dangerously low and it's the lack of a quick feedback loop.
For programming tasks that's not a problem because it doesn't matter the language there's always a compiler/interpreter I can use to quickly check what I did and this helps to get quickly in a good work flow but since I went to work with a customer which wants everything deployed on a lazily put together "private cloud" which needs configurations in non-standard and badly documented file formats, has a lot of stuff which instead of being automated gets done trough slowly processed tickets, sometimes things breaks and may take MONTHS to see them fixed... my productivity took a big hit since while I'm still quick at the dev stuff (if I'm able to put together a decent local environment and I don't depend on the cloud of nightmares, something which isn't always warranted) my productivity plummets when I have to integrate what I did or what someone else did in this "cloud" since lacking decent documentation everything has do be done trough a lot of manual tasks and most importantly slow iterations of trial and error. When I have to do that kind stuff (sadly quite often) my brain feels like stuck on "1st gear": I get slow, quickly tired and often I procrastinate a lot even if I force myself out of non work related internet stuff.
*I don't want this to sound braggy but being a passionate developer which breathes computers since childhood and dedicating part of my freetime on continuously improving my skill I have an edge over who do this without much passion or even reluctantly and I say this without wanting to be an èlitist gatekeeper, everyone has to work and tot everybody as the privilege of being passionate in a skill which nowadays has so much market2 -
So I've bought a new blue key switch mechanical keyboard... And now I want to type on it all the time...
Except, my brain isn't multiprogramming at all and can't focus on other shit when giving a typing test (and not some real code as my end semester exams are going on and I don't want to divert my time anywhere else... But I do waste time... Which is opposite of what I should be doing)
Also, my roommate initially had a bit of problem... But we have now reached a settlement (sorry roommate, but 4x times the price of brown keyboard is what I have on me now... So ig I'm poor. Sorry for disturbance)
So yeah... Good relatively cheap keyboard which I love to type on2