Just called Asus for a problem with my router, went to send them my systemlog.txt for analysis

"Oh we don't have an email you can send that to"

Me: "(me calling bullshit) let me talk to the tech team.."

*Get transferred*

"Hello this is the supervisor"

Me: "fml"

"Ya we don't have an email you can send that to, but we can use a different departments verification services to get a file from you, has to be a picture though"

Me: "What? I got a .txt file here, I just want to get it to you, does it really have to be a picture?"

"Has to be a picture or a PDF, we can't take txt files"

Me: "fkin.. srsly? Fine"

I can't believe Asus's system srsly. I think it's for virus protection, but viruses can be embedded in both picture formats and PDF, but not in txt. So wtf is going on lol

> project nearing deadline [✔]
> an IDE that hangs itself [✔]
> awkward status meetings that turns into pointless discussion [✔]
> confusing requirements [✔]
> getting addicted to tea [✔]
> losing track of time [✔]
> sleepless nights [✔]
> overgrown hair and beard [✔]
> did I shower today ? [✔]
> no srsly did I ? [✔]
> I don't know where am going with this [✔]
> I should probably get some sleep [?!]

Boobies

Set up an account at Wells Fargo today and they told me the password requirements... This is a joke right?

"Oh, I reverted your changes because I did not understand them"
I SPENT THE WHOLE DAY REFACTORING YOUR SHITTY SPAGUETTI SHIT U LAZY PIECE OF SHIT !
But I guess being a senior guy entitles u to sit your fat fuck ass in your chair writting garbage all day long.
Btw what he did not understand was f strings. In python. Srsly. How is that arrogant incompetent prick paid at least 10k more than me

Me: Hmm, let's check what's the issue with this styles... Seems like nothing special...

*15 minutes later*

Me: Well, now that's just fine, now i'm closin' this one and commitin'...
Wait, what the...?

/* frontend-developer's day rubric. devrant edition */

Ok, so I don't work yet and so I've never had to deal with any clients but based on the rants i have read this is how stupid I imagine most of them are.

Dev: Hey, would you like a chocolate bar?
Client: Yeah, sure.
Dev: here:
*hands chocolate bar over*
*client holds it in his hands, opens it and eats it*
Client: Tastes great
Dev: Ok, nice. So about the payment of the project...
*Clients face is swollen and he falls to the ground*
Dev: uhh, what are you doing?
Client *coughing*: Were.. were there nuts in the chocolate bar?
Dev: uhmm, yes. didn't you look at it?
Client: why didn't you tell me??!?!?!? I am allergic to nuts!!
Dev: uhh, I didn't know that. But srsly, did you not look at the wrapping of the fucking chocolate bar??!
Client: I am going to sue you!! You will go to prison!
Dev: Fuck off *leaves the room*

Image of the chocolate bar:

HO. LY. SHIT.

So this gig I got myself into, they have a whitelist of IP addresses that are allowed to access their web server. It's work-at-home. We just got a new internet provider, and it looks like I get a different public IP address everytime I disconnect and connect to the WIFI. And since it looks like the way they work on their codebase is that you either edit the files right on the server or you download the files that you need to work on, make the changes, and then re-upload the file back to the server and refresh the website to see the changes, now I can't access the server because I get different IP addresses. And it's highly inconvenient to keep emailing them to add IP addresses to the whitelist.

No source control, just straight-up download/upload from/to the server. Like, srsly. So that also means debugging is extremely hard for me because one, they use ColdFusion and I've never used that shit before and two, how the hell do you debug with this style of work?

I just started this last Tuesday, and I already want to call it quits. This is just a pain in the ass and not worth my time. I'll be glad to just go back to driving Lyft/Uber to make money while I look for a full-time, PROPER job.

By the way, can I do that to a contracting job? Just call it quits when you haven't even finished your first task? How does this work?

> Customer logs Jira ticket claiming app is not working
< I restart the app, investigate and explain tht their server has issues
ø Client closes the ticket as Resolved
-- a couple of days pass by ---

> Customer logs Jira ticket claiming app is not working
< I restart the app, investigate and explain tht their server has issues
ø Client closes the ticket as Resolved
-- a couple of days pass by ---

> Customer logs Jira ticket claiming app is not working
< I restart the app, investigate and explain tht their server has issues
ø Client closes the ticket as Resolved
-- a couple of days pass by ---
<...>

< I log a JIRA ticket explaining what and how is wrong with the server with suggestions how to fix the problem so the app will not crash any longer (client own the server, has his own sysadmins -- I don't even had permissions to open syslog.. had to hack dmesg on their PROD server to pin-point the issue)
> no reaction from customer for weeks. I ping the ticket

× app crashes again

> no reaction from customer for weeks. I ping the ticket
> customer leaves a comment that their sysadmins are looking at it trying to figure out what might be wrong (ignoring what I wrote in ticket's description??? srsly?)

× app crashes again
< I post detail investigation details: snips from logs, screenshots, everything with crystal clear explanations.

> no reaction for weeks
......

well that's fun..

I try to explain my problems to my 6yo twins. It is just HILARIOUS to see their small faces going "huh. Did you tried using that spark thing to send your emails for you?".
Srsly, they give better advice than half the devs I work with. Rubber ducking be damned.

I would kill all these +1 guys, srsly. I subscribe these threads to know if it will be implemented.

You do not add any value to issue:
* devs are pissed off as this does not help solving problem
* others are pissed off

No one really cares about your likes, really.

Debian dist-upgrade: not a single reboot

Windows updates:

Omg °o°

Me: here's the code.

Sr: allright, looks fairly ok. Just change all *FIELD* modifiers to protected rather than private.

Me: what? Why???

Sr: bcz that's the code style we've adopted.

Me: srsly? If so.. Where do you use private fields then?

Sr: nowhere. We use either protected or public so we could extend any class we want

SIDE PROJECT SHOWOFF

Srsly what the fuck does everyone else here do in their spare time

Why does everyone enjoy being pantless? I for one find it uncomfortable. One of the reasons I also struggle with wearing shorts at summer time.

Do you really work pantless? Sit on a couch/chair but in your undies?

Srsly....?

Coworker: I've got an error, can't figure it out...
Me: Send error
Coworker: NullPointerException
Me: fml

Sr. my balls.

I really need to let this out somewhere...

Why the f...? Srsly.. Why would anyone do that? I'm joining another project. Apparently lead dev has adopted a coding style, where:

1. Every dev writes code however he likes, i.e. no clean-code requirement at all.
2. All services are crud-only. I mean all service classes. All must have those 4 methods; no more, no less.
3. Half of the business logic is inside controllers.
4. Not a single comment... Interfaces, models, etc. -- not a single one.
5. Xmls -- tabs, classes - spaces.
6. Xml schemas are downloaded with each build rather than stored downloaded once and stored locally.
7. I can keep going on and on.

Is it just me or are these some really weird decisions?

God damn it, LEARN TO FUCKING READ!!!

#support-channel
> Admin: @here the tool will be disabled from today until Wednesday
> Chap: @here Admins, I cannot use the tool it says that it is disabled. Please let us know when we'll be able to use it again

FFS.. Srsly, man...

So my dear programming teacher really hates break statements... I mean really really really. He thinks it's better for readability if you don't break from any kinds of loops (not even ifs) well then we came across a switch statement in class. He says "breaks only exist because it's needed in switches" well how about returning from a fcking swith? or goto? then you need no break...
Is there anyone who could explain why I should NEVER use breaks and why it's bad in any piece of code? Why is it better to just use whiles because fors are apparently evil again? Srsly I just wanna ask him to show me some big code bases without breaks...

"dis shit aint working wtf mate?"

- somebody stackoverflow's question, bitching that it got downvoted

ŁEŊ@#fmęgwjnfčuÆ®ŊÆŁEŊ3ŋ4ħ€3łæŋ€4æł4ħæ4€ħ9æŋ98ł3ħŋ98↓łħ€9“→↓ŋħł93ŋ@38ŁŊ89ÆŁ4ĦŊ08ÆŁĦ093Đ3@09ŋæłęb„guwahęgawęgÆŁ$ĦÆEı$Ŋ(ÆŁ#Ŋ↑(łæ49↓ŋw

AAAAAAAAAAARRGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm gonna break this laptop in half if I will not get a break from Windows!

I'm running it in a VM and STILL this fucker gets on my nerves SO FUCKING HARD!!!

1. CPU% 100%. Laptop fans are spinning so hard it's ready to take off
2. My hands are on the laptop. THey are HOT from the heat from inside. Hell that's uncomfortable!
3. ctrl+shift+esc to see why is cpu% 100%. It's something called WMI Host something. Kill that mthrfckr!
4. Process respawns immediately and goes up to 100% again. I have already increased handles limitation for that service a few weeks ago. Like 20x more than it was before!
5. website in IE
6. does not seem to be responding
7. hit f5. Nothing happens
8. Hit refrech buttong on the toolbar. Nothing happens
9. Place cursor at the address bar and hit ENTER. Nothing happens.

Meanwhile my hands are burning.
WHAT THE FUCK!!!

What kind of idiotic system is that!! My asshole is a better OS than this piece of SHIT!

AAAARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#@ŦŊæ¶đ@#ĸogęq j

I'm super pissed. Better keep a 30-40 meters distance from me so the things I throw at you would not hit your ballz!

Now that I come to think of it, the only times I am THAT pissed is the times I am using windows. Srsly.

Allright, that was srsly cool!
We are doing family trips across Lithuania on weekends. This weekend we have visited a "gravity hill".

So basically here's what you do:
- drive your car down the slope, to the bottom
- stop the car. Leave at neutral
- the car itself starts moving.. UP TO THE HILL!!

I was sceptic, but ffs, it took my car less than 2 minutes to reach 25km/h from a point zero!!

I even tried once more with my engine turned off. The same thing happened :)

Hmm, I find it highly peculiar that I let a friend borrow my pc to watch stranger things on Netflix, with her account.

I signed her into the guest account, she picked Google Chrome (not signed in).

Now my Facebook feed and YouTube adds are all about stranger things..

I get the ip gets logged & mapped.. But srsly.

Lost my main job due to corona. All I have left now is my few personal gaming projects which generate decent money (usually around 2k euro a month but during corona jumped 3x 4x). I am trying my best to take care of my projects now because its all whats left. Last 2 weeks spent applying for jobs and did really well in 2 of them however didnt received an offer because they cancelled recruitment proccess all together. Meanwhile my gf lost her job and spends most of time in home. While Im trying to cashout as much as I can from my projects so that we could have a better future, she started nagging me about how I work too much and seems depressed. Srsly this fcking pandemic is killing me. Working from home is already hard enough, but being stuck in home with no opportunity to have time for myself while Im the only grown up is fucking killing me. Fuck off everyone Im tired of your needs, I have my own needs as well. If Im telling you that I need a couple weeks to finish my projects then fuck off leave me in peace. 2 weeks wont change shit but at least I would be able to make money for our house women. Stop being needy and start being fucking supportive or this will not going to work out.

Fucking apple & Mac OS..

So.. Before high sierra, you could create a USB using boot camp.
All good & dandy without too much fuss.

No longer. instead it automatically mounts & copies the os onto a apfs partition(?) and without as much as a mention or warning it just reboots immediately when it's done.

Srsly, not even a silly "hey, we need to reboot"..

Now, I could probably have gone to diskutil, formatted, set the boot flags and copied the files..
But rly, Nvm that.
Besides I might actually find some use in a windows install.

So needing to install windows to create an USB is acceptable.

But Bloody hell, it's been a while since I've been in this triggered from something..

T_T no warnings, just force reboot into windows.

Srsly???

parenting.stackexchange.com

Looking forward to read of some nice "dumps", "leaks" and "overflows" there. :D

devRant thanks you are what i was missing :D srsly its too fun great community

porra; caralho; toma no cu.

this fucking shit xamarin. I wish the ass who programed the xamarin vs2017 integration to go fuck off.

srsly, I just want to fucking code this fucking fucker VS2017 keep shitting all around me

first I was gonna install it. didn't install because no memory left. fair enough, my fault there.

cleaned 35 gbs.

finish installing VS, with xamarin. FIRST GOD DAMN TIME I create fucking project, 2 fucking errors and 3 warnings. I DIDN'T EVEN TYPE A COMMA.

ok, tried fucking it. it seems to be conflict between version of Android and xamarin forms. fucker you it shouldn't be like this. anyway.

tried downloading the updated Android version.

it failed at 80%! what error you ask? missing fucking space ok, fuck that thing is huge, ok, my fault again. uninstalled all programs I was not using, all projects I'm not current working on. more fucking 30GB free. tried again. ANDROID IS TOO FUVKING HUGE CAN'T INSTALL IN 30GB!!!

Ok. instead of updating android, gonna downgrade xamarin, can't downgrade. ok gonna remove and install an early version.

unistalled. CAN'T FIND XAMARIN DLLS.

I was like, fuck this project, gonna start a new one. ok, all seems fine, for some weird reason. Except no. I try adding a new page, ops, APPARENTLY VS2017 CAN'T LOAD A GODDAMN .XAML

Ok, I can create a .cs page. done, except now I get a fucking timeout error. fuck.

I search the internet for a workaround, see a guy saying I could manually add a .xaml + .cs by creating this files and then adding them to the proj file.

did it. I go again, everything seems fine. but now I can't freaking reference the damn page.

I'm fucking losing my mind here.

In the mean time I have to turn in this project at the end of the week AND I CAN'T FUCKING OPEN THE GOD DAMN FREKING PROJECT PROPERLY!

FUCK. MY. LIFE.
FUCK XAMARIM AS WELL
FUCK VISUAL STUDIO
FUCK MICROSOFT
FUCK THAT DAMN SSD
FUCK THAT BOSS WHO THINK THAT A 128GB SSD IS ENOUGH
FUCK IT ALL...

== Internship Interview Rant ==

This is the weirdest interview I've been to to be honest because it wasn't really ABOUT ME. It's like the boss is not really interesting in knowing what I can do, what I am capable of doing. He asked me about my educational background for 5 minutes and started explaining about the startup for 45 minutes. He explained how he came up with the idea like it was a children's bedtime story. He explain what the job is, BUT he didn't mention what programming languages they use. All he said was it required knowledge about different programming languages. I tried asking but he seemed to dodge the question for some reason by saying everyone needs to know a little bit of everything. (Srsly i don't even know what to start learning for this) After listening to him talk and talk and talk and talk, he finally said "hey, think about it and send me an email if you are willing to take it up!"

He works with STUDENTS. The team is composed of him and 5 students. o.O They all seem so..... quiet in the office. Is that normal ???? Or like shouldn't everyone be kinda "interactive" sometimes?

So there is a girl working there too for 3 weeks now but SHE IS IN ROMANIA like wtf, gr8 then i guess ill be the only girl there but hey perks of being a girl, u get to be spoiled sometimes XD it happens a lot !

Internship ad ----> Main language: English
Me: *rages internally during the interview and thinks: BRUHH WHY ARENT U SPEAKING IN ENGLISH i prepared what I was gonna say in english for an hour*
I wonder if the code is in english or maybe its not :(( But I wish it were because it would be soooo much easier in english.

And there you go, I guess I have one week to find a better internship or decide to deal with this talkative boss. This isn't exactly a story of my last job cause my last job is totally non-dev related. This is a story of (maybe) my future job unless I actually find a better internship.

Holy fucking shit... this didnt happen! IT FUCKING CAMT HAVE! NO NO NO NO! IMPOSSIBLE!
I LOST MY FUCKING BAG! RIGHT BEFORE ONE OF MY MOST IMPORTANT FUCKING TESTS! Ok, a little backstory, everyone in Switzerland or (due to alice's request) german can skip this part:
Here we have something called a "Lehre" (I think its called an apprenticeship or sth?) which usually goes 3-4 years, and in the middle, (end of 2nd) we have a "Teilprüfung" Which is basically a test which you HAVE to pass, if you dont, wait another year, and do it with the Final exams... and if you dont pass, your fucked. very very deep in the ass. And guess where I am? Yes. end of 2nd year. And guess what happened?
I LOST ALL OF MY STUFF! GONE. LOST. IM SO FUCKING SCREWED RIGHT NOW! (I have a small backup tho) BUT THIS IS JUST BAD! VERY FUCKING BAD!
OH GOD...
WHY THE FUCK ISNT THIS A DREAM!
I cant sleep...

send help.

fucking srsly.

send help.

A linux distro with all popular apps rewritten from scratch to use a single UI toolkit and consistent default keymaps, for a smoother desktop experience.

It's one of the reasons I have a tough time switching full-time because all the apps I need use so many different toolkits/versions/random keymap variations (inconsistent font-sizing, ctrl+tab vs ctrl+pgup, etc) that even the thought of switching makes my head spin.

Love the way GNOME's been going though (Except for their default keymaps. Ctrl+PgUp for Next Tab? Srsly?), and KDE is getting more consistent.

And yes, I know you can modify keymaps, but just wish they'd stick to widely used ones by default).

*downloads YouTube videos by ssyoutube.com and convyoutube.com
*tries YouTube Go
*downloads some videos by YouTube Go
*They are downloaded with captions
*Undecided
*YouTube Go randomly tries to redownload the videos
*thinking about come back to ssyoutube.com and convyoutube.com

❤️ Swift ❤️

"Module compiled with Swift 5.1.3 cannot be imported by the Swift 5.2.4 compiler"

but srsly

So you heard from that awesome tool that apparantly everybody uses.

Go to the web page:
One single continuous page in 90ies style with random blahblah targetting expert users and various edge cases without context. Some lines about arcane build commands in an unfamiliar language.

Not even a single, comprehensive line, what it does, what it is good for, no minimal example or hint even how to run it.

So you write thousands of lines of dense code, but are not able to drop some first lines of plain, understandable english for people just visiting the first time? How hard could it be? Fuck you, srsly.

!Dev

Sitting in a bus on 19 hour ride with my class to England a few things to rant about came to my mind:

Why the fuck do you have to blast shitty german rap music out of your fucking JBL boxes and why do you have to turn up the volume so much that I can still hear it although I am wearing headphones, listening to music and sitting 5 fucking rows in front of you.

Also why the fuck do clocks in buses never display the right time? How hard can it be to make the clock display the right fucking time?

Another thing: why does this bus which is especially made for long rides not have a fucking trash can?! Seriously wtf?

Rants aside I am really looking forward to staying in England for a week although I won't have a computer for the next week :(

Another thing: why the fuck is the coffee you get at pull-ins so fucking disgusting ?
Like srsly, it is made by a machine and still tastes like thrown-up.

And why the fuck does everyone look weirdly at you when you buy a can of red bull but everything is fine when someone my age drinks 3+ liters of beer and then throws up? What the fuck? People look at me weirdly when I tell them that I don't drink any alcohol, heck I am actually not even allowed to do so because I am 15 and not 16 (beer is allowed in Germany if you are 16+ but nobody really cares about that). Heck where I am from they even encourage you to drink beer? What the fuck??!!

Anyway looking forward to England and also sorry about the long non-dev related rant. Just had to rant about some people and society.

P.S. do you know any (preferably free) Android apps / games where you have to code or just solve problems with logic?

this is newest, srsly

Me and my Family(And just about everyone else)

A: "What's your address?"
B: "127.0.0.1"
A: "Srsly? I mean your real address"
B: "00.25.B5.AA.01.1F"

iiiii fffffuckingg hate articles that just explain something

put a piece of code

that piece of code uses X amount of classes/models

they never mention what structure are those models/classes made of

what is inside them

i cant continue following the article because i dont know what is inside them

they just put it in ur face and say Fuck you

no

Fuck YOU

<font size="1000000px;">FUCK</font>

<font size="10000000000000000em;">YYYYYYYOOOKUUUUUUUUUUU</font>

U MOTHFFFFFUCKERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

USELESSS ARTICLE

zzzzz

frustratioms

my nerves are torn

broken

disabled

demented

day

in life

obsession

hell

unreal

what is life
q

what are doing

why are doing this

what is the point of living

how long does it take for a man to die

why are some people blessed with luck and some are not

zzzz

u know what is even more frustrating

girls

yes

ohdont get me started on this topic

well i warned u

the path towards abundance lies upon the few; thou who shalt not risk high; shalt always stay thus low

girls also frustrate me bc

i always do every thing nice and im always nice

so i realized

being nice is fake as fuck and doesnt fuckin work

being urself doesn't do a Fckimg tHING

hhh

frustrations

.

breathe

.

in this hardlife

only the strong survive in this world
- tupac shakur

zzzz

so yes bavk where i was saying girls frustrate me because i always do what im supposed to

so

i tried being thou who shalt i am not

guess what mothrfucker

it works when u be a gofdamn fkig low mothfckr a u know a goddmn fkig punk then they respect u and want u

back i fckked up

i turned back to my real me, the nice me

and then they left me

they think being nice = means being weak

FUCCKK YOUU

ssss

zzzf

kindness != weakness

U FCKING WHORES

UNDERSTAND THAT

zzzzz

breathe

i just wanted to have a walk outside and thenit started raining

so i had to stay inside bc of the rain

m

i am very lonely

u know i was very fine when i was lonely at a very young age but now i need a living entity beside me

with me

i fking need

wait i will cuddle my fluffy dog rn maybe i will feel better

br b wait for me ok

i feel better now

fck

i remembered that goddamn girl again

man i feel so heart broken

srsly

i have sunk into the deepest depths of endless depression I think

it doesnt feel nice

it feels very lonely and depressing down here

but i thimk tjat is be because i care too much

some people say i overthink

I dont overthink

i am like the stealth people
the shadow people

i stay quiet and observe

everything

i always know what is happening but i rarely speak about it

and people dont realize

so they think they can fool me

no

everything has its limits

so much lies that im sick of it

i always tell it how it is

i always reward those who help me

i always help those who help me

i never forget those people

zzzZZ

why is it that people who dont give a single fucking Fffffficxkkckck about me

are the ssame people i almost care the MOST?

i cross hundreds and thousands of miles to visit a person, invest hours of my time to do that

i do that....

and they wouldnt even step 1 foot in front to see me....

what kind of life is this

vv

feel like cryin rn

.

zzzzz

.

i dont understand what one must do

what is the point

all i want is to be happy

that is it

but being happy is.... i wanted to say the hardest part of life but now my voice told me being happy is a state of mind

myself answered me that being happy ? is a state of mind?

so that means if i want to be happy even if everything around me is falling apart

in my mind i can create a psychological world that would make me.... happy ....?

or what

i dont understand what did myself tell me

why do i care so much if im lonely

u know my friend from college we go to same computer science college

hes a very smart man but a fake FUCKING friend, plastic as fuck

he reads philosophy booms and told me

"when a man is lonely for long enough, he will slowly start to fall apart"

that is me...... that is ...truth......

he quoted a philosopher from some book

zzzz

he also said a quote he read about the meaning of life

"this life is endless pain and the only purpose of life is to reduce this pain as much as possible so we can be happy"

what the fck that is incredibly depressing

what the fuck im actually crying rn

i feel stabbed in the back and left behind and cheated on, all of those happened and some of them are happening right now

dont know what to think about the reasons

all of this causes me such huge anger and depression and that is whT keeps me going

going by working harder than i am supposed to

without all this hurt there would be no glory

all this effort..... it better pay off at the end...... please God..... i beg you....

i have completed 50% of my life purpose, let me do the rest so i can die in peace...

(Ok, I love js in general (specially with es6), but here's something I hate about the "ecosystem". Dont take this too srsly also)

Holy fucking gagged shit, these project readmes that start out for too long about the project objective instead of stating the actual thing/s the software does.

WHAT DOES IT FUCKING DO!?
STOP BEING FUCKING FANCY ABOUT YOUR PROJECT.

Jesus christ, people jacking off about their awesome tool and how it will make everyone happy. No one cares.

"shitsmoke.js is a framework that focuses on delivering truly reliable data with static checking enabled on deployment."

WHAT THE SHIT DOES THAT MEAN?

Gimme a bullet point with the goddamn features (not the fucking BENEFITS) and I'm done.

These are like layers of marketing bullshit texts you have get through, getting more technical as you go on.

But sometimes they never do a technical summary, THEY GO STRAIGHT INTO THE GODDAMN API. And the API docs belong to a docs site, there is github.io and packages that take care of that.

You're like a goddamn linguistic detective, trying to disect the meaning of these words to understand if some package is what you're looking for.

And I don't wanna visit another website to understand what it does either!

You may not like GDPR but it will change one important thing - american companies will stop email spam. Srsly, in Europe you always had to check box that you want marketing spam. USA companies always worked in opt-out mode, which is soooo annoying

Have you ever wondered why !important is even working? Imagine this:

element {
color: #FF0000 !important;
}

It literally means the red color is NOT IMPORTANT. And this overwrites previous CSS rules such as in this example, previous element.color. Like seriously, where is the logic here? :D

When you find out your boss doesn't question the usage of: extract($_POST);

Our only pretty good and uderpayed graphic designed did not get raise so in few days he found company that offered him 1.5 more as starting wage.. Now we will be left with no designer and half of our project being behind schedule cause of unfinished graphic design.. losing 4x more than was raise that designer asked for...

Srsly there are greedy bosses.. then there are retarded bosses... but when Greedy retards run company it is next level idiocracy

i always assume that my code is right so when the compiler gives an error, its hard for me to find out why it gives an error and why it doesnt work. my mind is too convinced that it is correct.

i guess i have to sleep it off 😴 maybe tomorrow it will be easier to fix

I've refrained from commenting on which IDE is best and which isn't, what simply works for me is eclipse. So far it handles stuff for me pretty nicely... until today.

Look at this screenshot, can you spot the wtf? Like, SRSLY, WTF.... Might it really be just that DOT at the end or is it just the dot concatenated at the end of the error message?

Has anyone tried the "Connect app" on windows? To be able to screen cast for example android screen to windows.
What in the fucking fuck are those guys in Microsoft smoking? It fucking hijacks your mouse and keyboard with no way to control your PC. Only thing that works to go back to your PC is ctrl+alt+delete. Wanna close it? Alt+F4. No fucking UI except some broken pseudo setting. Srsly it seems like some intern did it. WHAT THE SHIT??

Is it OK to punch a game dev who codes stupid numeric bugs?

So my wife got into Stardew Valley, that admittedly awesome comfort game farming simulator.
She went pretty far in the game, and found some item that was supposed to highly increase the damage she could inflict onto cute little monster thingies.
It didn't work as intended.
Since equipping the piece of shit all her hits did 0 damage. She tossed the item away but the problem persisted. And on and on...
She took to the googles to try and find some explanation, and apparently that is a fairly common bug for mobile devs.
Then she called in the big guns (that is how I'm calling myself in this case, you will see why).

Apparently there is some buggy piece of shitcode somewhere in the game with a numerical insecure routine that overflows the attack modifier. I.e. if it was supposed to increase from 1.990 to 2.010, it actually went all the way down to -0.4.
She was lucky her attacks weren't increasing the monsters' HP.

We found a forum post where some dude said that he managed to edit the game save file and reset the negative-value attack increase modifier variable. Seems easy enough at first, but my wife uses iOS. Nothing is ever so straightforward with apple stuff.

We did get to the save file, she emailed it to me (the file has no extension and no line breaks in it, so we facepalm'd on a couple attempts at editing it directly).
I finally manage to get it into my personal 11-yo laptop... that won't open a single line file that big.

Cue the python terminal. Easy enough to read the file into a string var and search for the buggy XML tag. Edit the value and overwrite into a new file. Send it back to her by email. Figure out how to overwrite the file in iOS.

Some tense moments while the game reloads... and it works!!!! Got some serious hubby goodwill points here.
Srsly, this troubleshoot process is not for technophobes. It is out of reach to pretty much every non-techy user.

And now back to the original question: If I ever manage to find the kid who coded a game-breaking numerically unsafe routine and shipped it as if every test in the planet had waved it bye-bye, can I punch them? Or maybe buy them a beer, let's see how I get to cash that hubby goodwill tonight :)

whining

So I'm sitting here, working my ass off developing something far above my current skills.

On the opposite side of the table sits relatively new guy, working as a part of support "department". Relatively new means that he's with the company for around 1 month.

The guy started speaking to me. I took off my headphones and listened, while still reading code. He told me about how he'll have to carry out the recruitment process for the support department today. And that he was told to present himself as a leader of the department, blah blah blah.

To be honest, I stopped listening at that moment. I got really pissed. And it's not because of the absolute lack of the professionalism of the company (srsly, make a new guy do recruitment work?). It's because I asked boss to get someone to help me half a year ago. He did employ around 3 new support people (4th today). But no one for me.

And he has the balls to tell me that I NEED to work harder to make it for deadline that he imposed. That he won't employ anyone new for me because new people could stole his "idea". Because MAYBE in a month one guy, a junior like me, will come back (he's on a break to finish his master thesis).

Product I'm working on is probably the main reason other companies are even buying the system he's reselling. As a student I'm working only half-time, so those deadlines are almost impossible.

I wonder how he'll manage if I'll get accepted for the work I'm currently applying.

I don't know what's wrong with using Bootstrap

*insert office dude meme*

And at this point I'm afraid to ask

Let's code in xml ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

MS teams
- user activity status doesnt update properly
- your status stays as ONLINE even when 30 minutes afk or goes to AWAY after two minutes of being afk and stays that way after you started working again.
- status sometimes does not update in active chat window when person's status on the other side changes.
- sometimes, messages dont appear, until I click into the app and force it to update the status from away to active
- I/O
- One day everything works, suddenly next day your mike doesnt work. Then your audio is mute altogether. Or you suddenly start hearing yourself (echo). All without any configuration changes or restarting whatsoever.
- UI
- Happens so often... You get a new message in your active chat window and you have to SCROLL DOWN MANUALLY to see it!!!
- Coppied text from chat? HERE'S A TIMESTAMP AND A NAME OF THE SENDER AS WELL!!!!!

And Im not even mentioning the performance itself...
Srsly this app is horrendous

Signed up for an account on an online store, which then proceeded to send me my full password in plaintext, and in an unencrypted email.

Sent them an email 3 weeks ago detailing the security issue (i was extremely nice about it), but no response.

What else can i do?

a perfect app name taken by some shitty LQ indian who made a shitty LQ app that doesnt even look good and is broken

i feel like punching that shitty app

and shoving it up his ass

for taking the perfect name of my app that actually looks good and gets the job done

the kid even made about 6-7 accounts on ig about the same app but just putting dashes or underscores as the username THE FUCK?

the site looks so SO goddamn shitty, a lime green color as the background and a white text on that U CANT SEE SHIT THERE

NO PADDING, 3 ITEMS IN NAVIGATION MENU, 1 CHAT MESSAGE EXAMPLE

RUINED THE PERFECT SHIT FOR ME

FUCK U

i feel like going to deepweb and renting a hacker to take down his shitty instagram pages and the domain name, srsly whats the worst thing that can happen??

Srsly, who the fuck using internet explorer or edge in 2018??? I wanna drink a coffee with them while talking about mental disorders.

No matter how many newsletters I unsubscribe from, there will always be an unread promotion e-mail in my inbox.

Fuck Apache TIKA.
Its supposed to be a "universal file reader" or some shit. Im trying to use it as a PDF/image parser that does OCR when needed and yelds a full-file string. It does so, but the text ends up being IN THE WRONG FUCKING ORDER.
WTF would I want to parse the text out of a PDF in any order that is not the one the text is supposed to be read?!?!
"It is more efficient to work in random ordering", says the docs. No shit, really? Wouldn't it be even more efficient to just spit out random strings? Just as useful and 100% CPU-bound.
"You can add a property to forcefully put the text in the right order". THEN WHY THE FUCK IT IS NOT THE DEFAULT SETTING?
Srsly, what's the use case to a parser that yields scrambled text?!?

So I was glad that I finally completed the project for my bachelor's degree after fixing random bugs.
Here came this shocking news which left me stunned.

Some other batch bought a similar project from a project centre(lifeline for noobs to pass university project by buying projects made by someone else).

Head of the Department sent me a message that the project done by my team(95%me) is rejected as the other batch also has a similar project. He's aware that they bought it from a project centre. He's defending them that their money would go in vain as they bought it already.

I was like WTF!! Srsly? Do you even know what it takes to make a project functional? I've no idea what I'm going to do now.
#doublestandards

DRC Hide & Seek

Me: runs DRC on finished layout
KiCAD: Unconnected nets found.
Me: fixes unconnected and runs DRC again
KiCAD: Different unconnected nets found
Me: fixes unconnected and runs DRC again
KiCAD: Differen unconnected nets found
Me: srsly?! Why can't you tell me all of them at once?

WHITEPAPERS.

Not exactly a programming problem, but one of my many task (as i am apparently a multi headed hydra) is it to find Software for tasks. I made the experience, as more marketing experts are on it, and as more SEO is poured in as more information about a topic degrade.

Two examples:
i wanted to find out if there is anything that speaks AGAINST "the cloud" as a concept for Data Procesessing and Storage. (Beside that the company internet connection is crap). There are tons of documents that in a semi "scientific" way show that having a data centre with a constant staff of experts is superios to everything. And it goes on, every company has a different version of basically the same document, and they all subtley show that THIS company is the best.

Example 2:
ERP Software, the most infested pool of filth i have entered yet, be it just a tiny CRM System or a full blown SAP clone, they all have those "Whitepapers" that first look somewhat scientific or informative. Like "the top8 common pitfalls when introducing an ERP system". 7 of them read logically and were what i expected, the 8th was "dont get your IT involved".
Yeah sure, IT doesnt understand economical processes, fair enough, but not getting it involved at all sounds like selfdefense. A further look showed me that this particular vendor has a web-based solution but doesnt provide any further informations (srsly, the website is starved of actual hard informations). The screenshots let the software look a bit oldschool but what really threw red flags for me was the sentence "we are ready for Win10, we did significant adjustment to perform excellent with Windows 10"
So, either they have some system interwoven stuff (so why bother with Webbase then?) or its just another marketing bullshit sentence.

Either way, i found it to be really hard to get ANY reliable information about this particular topic which adds to the overall world experience of missinformations and the all-being "fakenews". But for many things one can usually filter through a lot of different informations that can be pieced together, with this..its all outright propaganda camouflaged as "useful information", some even try to let it look scientific. In the end its all biased..

ultimativly, this rant is about all the people that write those missleading whitepapers, fill the world with biased informations and make the whole planet a worse place.

Srsly Ansible/awx? No migrate scripts in a Django powered application? No one commits „python manage.py makemigrations“? 🤬

"Don't google this" 4 devs:
(Quine technology for the service of the evil)
Don't google "ken thompson hack"
I'll have nightmares
Ps: i you are sure youve seen this before, it had a typo, n i couldn't modify it

Xcode can't refactor swift code... I mean... srsly wtf

*srsly ++ed
Nice rite of passage, you guys <3

Any disposable e-mail address service:
"FIGHT THE SPAM"
"THANK YOU FIGHTING THE SPAM"
"YOU DID GOOD BY FIGHTING SPAM"

The users of disposable e-mail address:
*creates another spam account*
*creates another multiaccount in order to exploit a system*

Companies actually fighting spam:
Now there is even more spam to fight against. (which is not good)

About 2/3 of the accounts created daily on our website are spam accounts. We have to waste our time with this shit instead of actually improving our services. Since we do not track IP-Addresses and there are countless amounts of disposable e-mail domains AND there is still the option to create countless spam e-mail addresses within legit e-mail providers, there is no easy way of stopping this madness.

"Fight the Spam", you could start by deleting your shitty service or at least give us a list of all the domains you're using, srsly.

This is really a rant:
The company i work for uses the wso2 enterprise integrator for message transformation and so on.
I am in charge to get this thing to work.
And i am so annyoid about this fuc**** crap software, there price it as lightweight, fast and easy to use?
EASY TO USE?????
Who the fuck there had the IDEA to use XML as configuration files.
They have kinda no documentation, even searching the web makes no sense because you only can find there crap documentation, once i searched after another problem and found my own Stackowerflow question, which had a totally different term!!
And i guess they are making no testing, i mean if i want to edit a api and i set one bracket false or so, than if i click on save, i am doomed, BECAUSE IT DELETES THE CHANGES WITHOUT WARNING ME, i mean srsly are you kidding me wso2???

Srsly, I don't

I cri ;_; help

Ok so.

You know you have to deal with annoying things when you take on a guard duty role and yes, we signed up for it because of the mullah.

However, you also want to do this with a reliable and robust monitoring and alerting systemthat you can depend on! And no i am not going to advertise a product for this... What i will tell you is which one to avoid.

Meet Quest "Foglight" ... It does EVERYTHING! It monitors, it alerts, it does trend watching it does fancy shmancy graphics, it does reporting, it is very extendable... WAUW, right! right?

Well, if you were stuck somewhere in 2005-2010 maybe... But this fucklight is cutting short on EVERYTHING

Today , i got called up at 3:30 in the morning (i am typing this after the incident) because this shit of a system has "HIgh Availability" by basically letting the FMS server suck each others jaggons and hope it somehow respons. This is a sort of keepalived thing, but on proprietary java tech..

Oh, yes, it's written on java and... yes.. Java 6
This means that, effectively we are running RHEL5 machines (yes, RHEL 5!!!) because something more modern in place? nope.

I have no idea anymore what i am ranting about, i'm tired, i'm tired of this shit, i'm tired of getting called up just because of some dude has been cussing up a sales representative, sucked each others jaggons and pushed the federal goverment with a shit solution for almost a decade now.

Fuck Foglight
Fuck Quest software, because did you really think you would get enterprise level support for an enterprise product which you payed enterprise euro's for it? You are so naive, how cute...
And consequently : Fuck Dell and Good job Dell.. For purchasing quest software, mess around with it, and then dump it back to the market... Srsly Dell , you were like me when i had this hot ass chick as a girlfriend but later seemed to be too crazy to justifiably tolerate compared to her hotness. Dump it like it's trump.

Oh, and, wauw! Foglight graced us with a successful startup process after .. what.. 6 times restarting? In 2 hours... With 12 CPU's and 128 GB ram and .... oh fuck this you don't deserve such resources.

One of the reasons why I wanted to become a software developer is because I see so many products or services taking the easy way out, at the cost of killing customer expectations. For example, I was told about JobTrack.io, which is supposed to help manage job searching by keeping track of applications and their statuses. But almost as quickly as I was told, my mind goes into automatic promise defense mode. And rightfully so, because the service turned out to be almost as monotaneous as the job search itself! Not as seamless as I'd need it to be to get started right away.

Now, maybe there's a slight chance I don't know wtf I'm talking about here. But, what's stopping this product from using an email client that runs server side, to interface with the user's main inbox, to run sentiment analysis on emails for detecting job application submissions? Such functionality would obviously need permission from the end user, so there are no surprises that some 3rd party app is sorta kinda monitoring your emails. And of course measures should be taken to avoid detecting anything beyond the contextual lines of: "Thank you for applying to so and so", or "We've recieved your application! Next steps".

Present those detections to the user to confirm. And do the same thing for rejections and offers. Shouldn't be that hard especially when most sites these days allow you to sign in with Google, and that Google marks these particular emails as "Important"; which further filters the detection process, and partially does JobTrack's job for them.

Honestly, I think the app has promise, and hope this is just a case of starting off small.

Okay my Instagram feed is filled with Devin AI engineer! It's not that I'm threatened that it will take my job, but srsly? Is this a threat?

anyone else having Adventofcode problems? day1 told me the obviously right answer was wrong. after a full day of debugging two obvious lines of code, it finally decided to accept the first answer.

and day two seems to be doing the same. guess I'll just be a day behind then?

anyone else?

OK, So at my school I work as the assistant webmaster of our school newspaper. I joined the newspaper before my 'boss' but was demoted when he joined because nobody had anything for me to do? Yeah I was confused too. Anyway now I was working on making Bois for the writers and to format it I'm using simple html. So now the scene is that I and my boss are sitting side by side working on these Bois. I finish like 5 bios and look over to his screen and he hasn't finished the first fucking bio and he is still puzzled on how to fucking format it with a fucking paragraph tag!!! Later on he asks me how I format them I just say with p tags and the occasional br. He looks confused still so I ask if he knows html, he quickly googles fucking html and then replies no!!! SRSLY?!?!!!!? yOU ARE THE HEAD WEBMASTER AND YOU DONT KnOW HTML???? WTF NOT TO MENTION THAT HE GOT ALL THE CREDIT

Gf asked me to help her with getting science articles. She had some page that her university suggested students to use, but had troubles with downloading documents.

At first I was like "Hey, it says use IE, other browsers are not supported. Thats bad but.. whatever". Then it popped that she needs Java enabled - well, I guess we have to... Even updated it cause it was needed.
Restarted IE, clicked download again and... Java security blocked web app... Eh, I don't trust it but whatever, just let's check what if I whitelist it.
Got some basic view, 1 dropdown list for "file name format" (like anybody cares), path selection where to save file, and some checkbox. Lame, but let's just leave it behind.
Downloaded, it turned out to be html file, not pdf, fishy that it was single file, but hoped for some text styled with css, so I opened it and got redirected to page where I clicked download.
Checked that file content - html with empty body and script tag containing js that redirects on load.

Srsly?😐

Instead of using MySQL, I zipped a bunch of json files... It's fast, but definitely not reliable, I was young and stupid, I should finally getting started with mySQL, srsly.

I successfully PCI passed through my nvidia 970m to Bluescreen-OS on a nvidia optimus laptop.
Totally useless, if your GPU does not have any video output ٩๏̯͡๏۶

What's the point about having an HDMI output, if it neither works with the intel 530, nor with the 970m? Is it even connected? I mean, srsly, why would you do that? Best Linux support ever!!!1!!!

Life srsly pisses the crap out of you.

Socializing and Human Interaction sucks.

Dear provider, COULD YOU PLEASE SENT ME YOUR DSL INSTALLATION CODE BEFORE YOU TURN A COMPANYS INTERNET DOWN??? SRSLY this is the biggest bs. No phone no mail since 8am, new hardware won't work without this fkking code.

I have a meeting in 1 hour that should be about the deployment of a product. This morning I got 2 emails from the client about some not so small changes.

Not sure how I can explain that I'm not a wizard.