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Boss: Our customer's data is not syncing with XYZ service anynmore!
Me: Ok let me check. Did the tokens not refresh? Hmm the tokens are refreshing fine but the API still says that we do not have permissions. The scopes are fine too. I'll use our test account... its... cancelled? Hey boss, why is our XYZ account cancelled?
Boss: Oh, "I haven’t paid since I didn’t think we needed it" (ad verbatim)
😐2 -
Them: Root, you take too long to get tickets out. You only have a few simple ones. You really need to rebuild your reputation.
Also them: Hey, could you revisit this ticket? Could you help ____ with this other ticket? Hey Root, how do you do this? Root, someone had a suggestion on one of your tickets; could you implement that by EoD? Hey Root, i didn't read your ticket notes; how do you test it? Hey, could you revisit this ticket for the fourth time and remove some whitespace? Hey Root, someone has non-blocking code review comments you need to address before we can release the ticket. Hey Root, we want to expand that ticket scope by 5-6 times; still labeled a trivial feature though.
Also them: Super easy ticket for you. Make sure you talk with teams A, B, C, D, E and get their input on the ticket, talk with ____ and ____ and ____ about it, find a solution that makes them all happy and solves the problem too, then be sure to demo it with everyone afterward. Super easy; shouldn't take you more than a couple days. Oh, and half of them are on vacation.
Also them: Hey, that high-priority ticket you finished months ago that we ignored? Yeah, you need to rewrite it by tomorrow. Also, you need to demo it with our guy in India, who's also on vacation. Yes, tomorrow is the last day. (The next day:) You rewrote it, but weren't able to schedule the demo? Now you've missed the release! It's even later! This reflects very poorly on you.
Also them: Perfect is the enemy of good; be more like the seniors who release partially-broken code quickly.
Also them: Here's an non-trivial extreme edgecase you might not have covered. Oh, it would have taken too much time and that's why you didn't do it? Jeez, how can you release such incomplete code?
Also them: Yeah, that ticket sat in code review for five months because we didn't know it was high-priority, despite you telling us. It's still kinda your fault, though.
Also them: You need to analyze traffic data to find patterns and figure out why this problem is happening. I know you pushed the fix for it 8 months ago, and I said it was really solid, but the code is too complex so I won't release it. Yeah I know it's just a debounce with status polling and retrying. Too complex for me to understand. Figure out what the problem is, see if another company has this same problem, and how they fixed it.
-------------
Yep. I'm so terrible for not getting these tickets out, like wow. Worst dev ever. Much shame.
LF work, PST.12 -
Hide yo' wives and yo' onanism, the haxors are cumin... i mean, coming for you!
Found on Reddit :D
10 -
Code works.
I'm happy.
Maybe she's happy.
Code doesn't work.
I look frustrated.
She's definitely not happy.3 -
I was once working for a company as a part time dev in the centrum of my city.
After working there for almost 1 year I noticed that I didn't get paid the last 2 months. I think it was about 500 euro's. (1 day per week).
So I went on my bike to the company to see whatsup. I came into the store and told my boss I hadn't been paid for 2 months. Even tho I did work.
He then got so angry! Just started yelling "YEAH BECAUSE THE PROJECT ISNT NEAR COMPLETE, NOTHING IS WORKING" I explained him the panel still had to be configured and that everything he asked me to do had been programmed and he then fucking told me he wanted it a different way even tho we clearly discussed it WEEKS AGO and he clearly said what he wanted. so he wanted dont revisions. I told him that this is not possible at this moment because holidays are around the corner and I want to go om vacation. (and he too!!!)
He then got so fucking angry he said "come with me for a second" we walk to the door of the building and then he just pushed me out of there and kicked me in my back.
I got so fucking pissed, I opened the door and asked him if je thinks this is a normal way to discuss. He closed the store door again, and I couldnt hold back anymore. I threw my full can of Red Bull against the glass door. The can exploded, and his whole fucking window had energy drink on it. He took some fucking steal pipe, so I walked back. But while trying to get away I jumped on his store sign. Which broke into pieces (they are quite expanasive). He came outside with his fucking pipe and he was trying to hit me. We had a crowd and people started yelling at him. I walked away but the asshole took my bike and put it inside his store. So that I couldnt leave.
So than I called the cops and reported him. For minor assault and some other things. Shortly after I deleted the entire project from his stupid server.
I really dont know this kinda shit happends, he probably felt like I didn't deserve that money even tho I did everything he asked for within deadline. Trying to solve it after vacation was also not an option. I signed him up for a few news letters after that.11 -
It is the year 2022.
We have multiple robots on Mars.
We have mRNA vaccines.
JIRA does not yet have a dark mode.17 -
!rant I finished crocheting the capelet I was working on. Not too bad for a first attempt, I think!
26 -
You’re not just an imposter. You’re the trickster goddess, the deception prodigy, the mastermind. The supervillain surrounded by mere mortals.
Embrace it.5 -
If you don't let the company enslave you then you're not a team player.
Also, you're definitely NOT flexible!8 -
!rant
Yesterday I got my first promotion that was based on merit and not because I graduated or moved company 🍻
#feelsgoodman6 -
Oh, nice. Now Windows 11 doesn't just fuck up AMD CPUs with lack of performance, but also SSDs. NTFS at its finest, but see the tags.23
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Story of a penguin fledgling, one of my end users whom I migrated from Win 7 to Linux Mint. She had been on Windows since Win 98 and still uses Windows at work.
Three months before. Me, Linux might not be as good, but Win 10 is even worse. User, mh.
Migration. User, looks different, but not bad.
One month later. User, it's nice, I like it.
Three months later. User, why does Windows reboot doing lengthy stuff?
Six months later. User, I hate Windows. Why is everyone using this crap?
One year later. Malware issues at work. User to IT staff, that wouldn't have happened with Linux. Me, that's the spirit!31 -
Special 2022 greetings to the last of us who still run truly static websites: update your footer template, recompile, upload.10
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Just pushed my first ever ticket to production! AAAND on top of that, did not take down our entire system. 😅7
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Customer call.
Customer: what's the status of the software?
Me: it's a bit of wood work.
Customer: wood work?!
Me: yes, I think it would work.
Customer: ...
Me: ...6 -
Not biting off the head of my incompetent manager.
Genuinely took a lot of effort. Partially the reason why I have depression. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯1 -
LOL Have I Been Pwned has pwned itself, cost-wise. Here the steps:
1) Go all in on cloud shit like Azure
2) Think you're a smartass
3) Trick the cost side with even more cloud, this time Cloudflare
4) Be not quite as smart as you think
5) Enjoy your 7000 EUR bill
6) Make some tweaks and continue with step 2.
Source: https://troyhunt.com/how-i-got-pwne...
Bonus laughter: he's a "Microsoft Most Valuable Professional", though not an actual employee.27 -
Web Devs - How many projects do you typically work on at once? I am currently developing 24 websites at once, most of them custom (homepage). I just feel like that is absurd and my company is absolutely insane. Not to mention I'm the front line for client communication as well, pretty much the project manager AND developer. We're a huge company too, not a start up. Just feel like not having project managers for web dev industry is unprecedented except for freelance. 😡👎🏼18
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No other language can do something as fucky as javascript.
"7 high severity vulnerabilities"
$> npm audit fix --force
"13 vulnerabilities (11 high, 2 critical)"
How is this fixed?!
It will be a great day when JS finally prolapses under the weight of its own hubris.15 -
Recruiter story.. hilarious stuff..
I have an interview in next fifteen minutes and was setting up for it.
Recruiter calls me to remind me of the same.
I ask her to tell me who the interviewer would be, because she did not mention in the invite and also did not respond when I asked her over the email.
Her response: sure, wait a minute... Actually we are not allowed to disclose interviewer.
LMAO WTF!!7 -
When your partner rolls over in their sleep and manages to smack you in the face… not the best way to wake up.15
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During job interview
Me : Am I going to maintain old solution?
Interviewer : Of course not.
2nd day
PM : Please fetch project X from SVN5 -
* installs pybullet via pip
* imports pybullet
* Runs
NoMmoDUlEFoundErRrRRRrroR: no module named pybullet
... Get fucked. 😐24 -
When you ask a short question(in Slack) to your teammate that can be simply answered in Slack and they start a video call immediately after reading your question...
Now you have to stop music/video, clean the background...
1 -
I ordered a reduction sieve for my espresso cooker from Amazon, but got this instead (Euro coin for size comparison). They'll resend the correct article, but WTF is this shit even?! Crazy crap!
23 -
I recently learnt that even chrome and Firefox use Webkit instead of their own engines in the iPad, because Apple requires so. So you can not use any alternative browser. You can not install oder versions of Safari as well. You can not open any browser-console or whatever. What the serious fuck.
I've hated Apple for my life but now I have even reasons!5 -
It's highly important that these wet wipes are not, and I repeat NOT, used by non other than professionals.
6 -
X: Hi, regarding that ticket that you made...
You said "Implement logging to find out the culprit in site generation"...
What do you mean exactly?
Me: "Read the meeting notes, we had a full discussion on this 2 weeks ago".
X: "We don't understand it..."
Me: "As I said before, I have no experience in this tech stack... I'd expect bla to have a logging framework and I'd - for easier recognition - implement additional logging levels based on criteria <me just reading the meeting notes>"
X: But how do we do it?
...
I wish I had invented this discussion.
Because it hurts.
For the jolly of it, I had similar discussions today.
Three times to be exactly.
As I asked some dev what I should do next, put a foley catheter up his urethra or change the bed pan he wasn't amused.
Guess I'll get monday a call of HR.
So Monday I have less work to do, which is awesome.5 -
Wanna know why Windows sucks so much? It's because of the Windows users. No, really!
Windows user: But but but I can't switch away from Windows because MIMIMI!
Microsoft: Ah, is that so? Then why should we even try to make (and pay for) an effort?5 -
I leave work feeling like I was beaten. Not just physically, I feel mentally beaten sometimes I want to cry.8
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To anyone asking for tips and tricks to start programming or become good at it, here is your ultimate golden advice: learn how to google and stop asking stupid questions like this before doing a quick research.
Reasons why:
1. You will most likely to learn better if you do your own research before asking for help. Even if you can't solve problem, you will be better and better at googling over time.
2. It is instant source of information. No need to wait for response (except response from server of course).
3. It takes only YOUR time.
4. Much more possible solutions/answers to your problems/questions.
5. Your quality of life will be improved over time. Not only your dev life but your daily life too.11 -
When I see everyone is busy in MS Teams(in meeting) and I am not invited to irrelevant meetings anymore.
5 -
RETARD MASTER: So how did you feel about this sprint DEV?
*nothing is planned, new tickets added each day and old ones removed - inconsistent sprint*
DEV: Well, it’s a bit chaotic, but it’s understandable. I’m used to it. Nothing’s to blame here. Client can’t produce their end of the bargain on time.
*3 week later*
DEV MANAGER: So RETARD MASTER gave a feedback. He told me you insulted him.
DEV: Can I please die now? Not funny.12 -
Nvidia might stop being a douchebag about Linux: https://developer.nvidia.com/blog/... Right now, that doesn't change much yet, but it opens a possible road.20
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Let me make this clear.. overusing ξ, ζ and ς in your equations or formulae does not(!!) make you smart!5
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For the first time I tried to use WordPress. I spent almost 30mins. Now I decided I should not use that again in my life. Fuck WordPress.4
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As someone into the cutting edge research in tech, it is my pleasure to inform you that I finally bought a pair of Bluetooth headphones. 😁
Yeah, nah, the irony ain't lost on me.30 -
Can anyone recommend any good IT / hacker related films that are not HACKERS or THE MATRIX. Thanks.19
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Can we all just set aside our differences for one day and agree that Elon Musk DID NOT invent the electric car?
Please, for sanity's sake!14 -
You think jQuery would finally have died after the IE era? Or that it would only be used to still pander to IE users?
Well... nope: https://w3techs.com/technologies/... says jQuery 3 has overtaken jQuery 1, which was the only version to even polyfill IE.
WTF is wrong with web devs, just WHY?! jQuery's use cases are shit that would be simpler and with less code without jQuery, shit that should be done in CSS instead, or shit that doesn't belong on websites to begin with.42 -
Ever noticed whenever you actually need a friend, none of them can be reached?
Technology has failed me. Where is my robot companion?18 -
www.dartlang.org
Dart helps you craft beautiful, high-quality experiences across all screens
... Not my screen though
I forgive them 😊
1 -
If your cookie preference setting doesn't include triple chocolate then it's not much of a cookie preference setting3
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I am using do while ONLY on programming exercises. And do not remember a single case I have used it for anything real.5
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They're not selling water in bullet trains because of COVID. I'm very proud to save people's life by dehydrating myself.
Fuck that shit.19 -
Another day, another shitty set of JIRA tickets.
In this week's edition, we run into an issue you'd think is a meme, something you couldn't even make up: three tickets with IDENTICAL titles, but miraculously, they actually refer to three DIFFERENT tasks! (Also comical, they're not bugs, they're tasks, but mouth breathers don't really know the difference, and at this point I just don't have the energy to attempt to explain what could be explained to elementary school children.)
I present a rare look into our national archives!
This document features two exhibits:
Exhibit A: product owner's original ticket titles
Exhibit B: translated-into-competency-because-i'm-not-mentally-deficient ticket titles
Just more proof that 'product owners' don't own shit, the devs are the real ones who actually know what is going on.
I mean just LOOK at Exhibit A's titles. As a big smart manager, do you write those tickets, smile, and say to yourself "Ah, yep, that's very clear, I'll definitely remember what each of these mean literally 5 seconds from now!"
Is asking for literally 30 seconds more of thought too much to ask for? Apparently.
Just kill me
Happy friday ☠️
7 -
v2.0.22 is now officially LIVE in GMT+2. Congrats and good job everybody!
Let's not fuck this one up, shall we? Let's keep our shit together this time.6 -
Everytime I think I'm smarter than the compiler, I'm... absolutely not smarter than the compiler lol4
-
Current Job Title:
Hoarder Bug Exterminator
Details:
Fixing code for projects that have not been refactored ever in 20+ years. -
I am a weird dev. No urge to rant really, mostly internal frustrations if any.
Today I had my first meeting with the client and it went smoothly - I showcased demo in the current state, they approved, asked a bit more about the technology and that's pretty much it...
I know, I know... I'm just starting and it's gonna change but, idk why, I think I'm in a good work environment.1 -
"I'm not distracted, I'm just very focused on something else"
Excuses that sound legit pt.2
PS: guilty3 -
No, a 33 Page README is not the better choice.
Not for reading.
Not for writing.
Compared to a /Documentation/ folder
+ good overviews / links4 -
Getting "bug" tickets from customers complaining about EXACTLY WHAT I DESCRIBED WOULD HAPPEN. THATS NOT A F&)$*(%$(*# BUG, THATS LITERALLY WORD FOR WORD WHAT I WROTE IN THE TICKET LAST WEEK YOU F&#*(@#$() NEANDERTHAL PIECE OF SH$%*(#(*)!!! WE AGREED ON THIS EXACT BUSINESS PROCESS WEEKS AGO. DO YOU EVEN READ THE WORDS THAT I WRITE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA5
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!rant Taking the kittens (they’re like 5-6 years old at this point but they’re always going to be kittens to me) to our old vet (45 minute drive from where we currently live) in a couple hours when they don’t like car rides or the vet and when we know they need to get vaccine shots and we’re not allowed to go inside with them. It’s the first time we’ve ever taken them to the vet and not been able to be there with them. 😭 I’m so nervous/anxious/scared for the little guys.
Wish me luck, friends.4 -
Stories from Gary #000
Short background info:
So I'm working as a game dev for 3 years now and by now I can say that I've seen some shit. Mostly because of one of our game designers, let's call him Gary.
So Gary, from here on called GDG (Game Designer Gary), is a regular game designer (GD). His job is to come up with new game ideas, commission the assets, make sure that translations are done, etc. - simply put, he has to get a lot of shit together before we can start working on a new game.
Would be no problem at all if GDG wasn't lazy as shit and would work for once in his life. No dev really wants to work with him anymore, since he's known for calling a game or any issue "ready for development" even if half the assets or specs are still missing.
Let's move on to a particular situation that happened a couple of months ago.
I had an issue assigned to me, which was about implementing the translations for a new game. As I read the issue and checked if everything I needed was given, I noticed that the most important part was in fact missing - the keywords for the translations.
-.-
So, I called GDG and asked where I could find the keywords, to which he responded "Oh, I'm working on them right now... and by the way I got a weird bug with the translation program. Can you come check it out?". Sigh. I went over to his office, rambling about how I should be able to help him with a program I rarely use and which was written ages ago.
As soon as GDG saw me coming roundbthe corner, he started explaining how the keywords aren't ready yet, since the program to create translations and their keywords won't let him name a translation.
"I can create new translations, but I can't assign a keyword to them."
"Okay, show me what you did", I told him, eager to leave.
He started to type the keyword, which turned out to be huge ass long and immediately I noticed a little counter, like "x/50", directly beneath the text field started to count up with every new character GDG typed. See where I'm going with this? HE WASNT ABLE TO RENAME A TRANSLATION BECAUSE HE WAS TOO LAZY TO FUCKING READ AND CONCENTRATE FOR ONCE. Sorry for that, but even thinking about it gets me angry again.
To some this might sound like nothing, but it really got to me at this point. Maybe it will become more understandable as I post more GDG stories.
tl;dr: A 40 something year old man, who's been working in his job for over 10 years wasn't able to use a program which he daily uses and asks me for help, only to find out he's a complete dipshit.4 -
The good: use the hardware watchdog in your application control flow.
The bad: don't use a watchdog.
The ugly: trigger the watchdog from a fucking timer interrupt.4 -
who the fuck decided macos not showing the file path in finder etc is the default
also not having a home directory available by default in the side bar
i fucking hate you so much9 -
Microsoft is slowly turning office 365 into employee spyware. Im not surprised just disappointed.14
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Government applications meant to handle private data made in the laziest way using cordova. Hell yea. Bonus points for using the developers account with his first and last name as publishing company to put the app on playstore and not their own official one (not that they have one). Whats not to love. Cant wait to beautify that js to find out that the calls are http and not https.3
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And on today's schedule, we'll be teaching the managers how to use a new dashboard, because not only do they not understand tech, they don't understand life!
waaaah_waaaah_waaaah.mp3 🤡2 -
I just found out that I should be using 4 spaces and not a tab for indentation, MY WHOLE LIFE IS A LIE.15
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I was working as a software dev contractor at this company providing specific e-learning services for a specific industry X.
One day the CEO posts on Linkedin about an interview discussing the potential of gaining $100k per year working in industry X after getting specialized training for 6 months (using our e-learning platform of course) .
My gross income at the time was $65k. My experience was about 7-8 years. Now the thing is you might say "gee that's pretty low for a dev, especially a contractor", and yes I agree, but you have to understand a few facts:
1. I am from eastern Europe (cheapish labor - which btw for all of you out there from the West, including Germany and whatnot, it is xenophobic to consider easterners cheap and it personally insults me and my ability - but that's another story)
2. I was happy to accept the offer since it was the best I had up to that point :))
Now, by the time the LinkedIn post I was heavily invested in the product development. I personally had written 30% of the code (frontend and backend) compared to the whole development team (about 15 devs)... and yes you might argue that performance is not measured by number of lines of code... but trust me when I am saying I did the most on that product, and I am not saying this to brag, I actually care about the stuff that I work on.
When I saw that post on Linkedin I thought to myself "what kind of BS is this? I am a dev and devs are supposedly the best paid workers out there, and a guy from industry X that just got trained for 6 months would get more than me?! WTF?!"
So I messaged the CEO ...
Me: I noticed the post from linkedin about $100k by working in industry X, I am curious how does one get to that revenue per year? What is your advice?
CEO: The best way to obtain value is by creating value which you maximize continuously.
Me: and how does one maximize value?
CEO: it does not matter how hard your work but how large of an impact you make!
Me: ... and how do you measure impact? (me thinking about performance reviews for contract negotiations - and because performance reviews should be SMART -> meaning it should be measurable somehow)
CEO: Simon Sinek says ... << insert motivational quote here because I don't remember and don't care >>
I just lost if after reading the name "Simon Sinek" ...
So you see my dear friends ? It is all fairy dust, smoke and mirrors, in the end it is about maximizing profits, lowering costs and maintaining the illusion of opportunity... when there is none.
Lord is my witness... I hate hypocrisy and quackery ...
You can imagine that my contribution on that product immediately lowered, doing the bare minimum to meet the contract demands AND I FEEL NO REGRET.
%&#$ YOU SIMON SINEK.4 -
2year project got cancelled, not because of covid, not because of budget reason, but because a new politician got elected that is against our company industry.7
-
So...
Paying minimum wages as become the norm in Portugal.
No matter that I have the same formation time in my area, plus experience, than a doc or engenheir everyone wants to pay minimum wages...
I'm so tempted to ask the next interviewer (usually an engineer) if his also getting minimum wage....
I'll do one year at my corrent company and will probably get out of this Europe's Ass.
Sorry for the bad typing. Working till 8 am11 -
However pathetic it may sound, I haven't. I've made good acquaitances, yes. But friends...
Last I had friends was in my first uni years. Long, long ago. After that - they went on their path and I - on mine. Work, family, personal projects and sometimes moto rides - that's my life now. Not really much time for friends. Not really much time to make any. Not enough time in a day to think/worry about it, not to mention reconsider my priorities/choices.5 -
!dev
Well fuck you Epic Games and Deep Silver!
I was really interested in getting Metro Exodus, but I'm not gonna install that shitty Epic Store!
Fuck off!11 -
TDD has not been proven in studies to provide substantial reduction in cyclomatic complexity or other metrics of software development.
16 -
Absolutely nothing excites me anymore in this field. Tech is such a commodity and I’m just so over all of it. Not gonna go all Ted Kaczinsky but I find myself longing for a time when not everything and everyone was controlled by computers. We’re not far from total transhumanism and despite what some may believe, that’s not a good thing.5
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Asus announced their AM5 board X670E Extreme. The E already stands for Extreme, which makes it an Extreme Extreme.
My feeling is that AM5 will be extremely - expensive!
That's because the AM5 LGA socket moves cost from the CPU (formerly PGA) to the mobo, but AMD certainly won't drop CPU prices, rather the opposite, and then there's also DDR5 as cost driver, not to mention tons of PCIe 5.0 where we don't even have AIBs.
On the upside, that would finally end the days of GPUs causing a disproportionately large share of the system cost - if only because the rest gets more expensive.6 -
Just got off a call doing some classic "I know you are not tech support but please help me connect my iPhone to my computer", and I heard the following words:
"What's the Windows start button?"
This was not a boomer. This was not a Gen Y, Gen X, or even Millenial!
I shit you not, a zoomer did not know what or where the windows start button was.8 -
If you have a new Alienware, I highly recommend not to try installing Ubuntu on it. I can't even describe how many levels of hell I went through to get stuff working, and how every Ubuntu base update gives me a panic attack.
From Ubuntu not installing with RAID settings, then not being able to boot in GUI mode because Nvidia drivers, to built-in keyboard, speaker and mic not working.
Praise the Ubuntu lord, now everything is working, but I still can't adjust the rgb keyboard colors :(25 -
Not bad vs 2022. Not bad !
I wanted to write that (really, not a joke).
Sometimes, auto complete just works.
-
Thinking about switching jobs...
Do you prefer working in a smaller startup sized company, a bigger more settled one, or as a consultant?18 -
Sartre once said "Hell is other people" .
Obviously he did not use public transportation very often.1 -
Bossman told me to give my project more hierarchy and to add all those weird __init__.py files.
I don,t quite like all those boring empty files, so anyone got some bri'ish language "innit?" jokes or other awful puns to add as comments?8 -
The Tale of Mouse and Watch
Once upon a time, a mouse wanted to know what time it was. So it asked the first guy who came along, but it didn't understand Suaheli. Anyway, he just had mumbled, gotta kick the cat in its lazy ass.
So the mouse moved on and nearly got it when it met another mouse who bad been sewn to a dead elephant's ear exactly 27 years ago - but unfortunately, it had forgotten the time of day when that had happened.
The seeking mouse came up with the idea of doing something with the sun, but since it was only dumb mouse, it looked right into the sun and was blinded.
Now pretty desperate, it tumbled through the gutters that were full of trash. Accidentally, it fell over a dumped watch, and the mouse broke its nose.
The lesson: sometimes, even a blind mouse may find a broken watch!5 -
The bouba/kiki effect is a non-arbitrary mapping between speech sounds and the visual shape of objects. It was first documented by Wolfgang Köhler in 1929 using nonsense words.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...17 -
I made that request a month ago or so, not long after i started to use devrant more often than any other app, and i can say only that i am glad that i pressed "install" that time when i found it in the GoogleStore.
Thank you all for making this community more like a family than a refuge!
Truth is i feel a little bad now for doing that but i might be able to repay the founders and all mambers of this community somehow, someday. And i am looking forward to do it 😁
Cheers!
4 -
Lost my temper at one of our volunteer moderators the other day. We had to do a test using live data, our sysadmin warned him, but not far enough in advance and not really by the right channels. So that was on us. sorry not sorry. But so then he didn't believe us. He must be a geek too cuz he responded with some stupid math problem for me to solve, as if that would prove we work here and aren't hackers or scammers. I replied "how about if i just kick you out of your own group and delete your account, would that convince you?" And so I did. Asshole. Of course I had to apologize later and get a lecture from the boss, but it was kinda worth it.1
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Fucking customer industrial machine doesn't work properly because the dumbass who designed the control algo failed to consider basic physics how this shit is even supposed to work. Just to be sure, he also included some race condition in the measurement part of the software.
-
My goal is to find the motivation to make a MVP for a company idea I have. The chances are low but not non-existent....1
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Ready for another look into my JIRA life?
Ticket Title: "The 'Selected photos' setting will result in users being able to select only one photo at a time."
Ticket Description: "This is not directly a bug, because this problem is caused by the selected setting. Here one would have to consider to give this option no more and/or with an error message the user on it to make attentive, how he can change the attitude."
I don't even have to worry about NDA in this one because it makes absolutely no sense.
BTW, we don't have a single text in the app with the words "selected photos"
99% sure the creator of this ticket wrote it when they were high, drunk, or both4 -
"Please move the logo left. The text goes a bit under."
Do you guys think people realize how unclear they are, and are just too fucking lazy to write the full spec? Or are they just so fucking stupid they don't realize I literally have no fucking clue what to do exactly with comments like these?
I guess Hanlon's razor applies here, but some days I just don't know...
Happy Friday! ☠️3 -
Had to fire two good developers and a decent QA engineer due to financial reasons in the company :(
That was the painful part, but moreover GUESS WHO'S GONNA GET MORE RESPONSABILITY FOR THE SAME WAGE?!
So long and thanks for all the fish. I'll see you in valhalla3 -
So why on earth would Postgres not spell this correctly?
```select rolname from pg_roles;```
Is it that someone could not spell rolename correctly?4 -
Bicycling.
I get to relieve stress and not think about anything but my breathing and how much my legs hurt.
Meanwhile, my brain can relax and work out solutions to problems I'm not thinking about.1 -
worst - not finding a job/internship for months
best - I now have my first dev job, and I will be graduating college and getting married this month! -
Boss asks if the project will be finished today, I reply ‘yes’ and then realised I’d not pushed my code after working from home the previous day! Doh!1
-
happy new year everyone! not that anything ever changes, but hope is free 😅
i wish all of you a year with very little reason to rant ✨1 -
Hail Adventurer,
By Linus, do not fear what you see
and curse not I, but those before me
hold steady in the storms to come
brace for bugs, wherever from
I pass on to you, the light of PHP
Use it well, to fight against scrutiny
if it works, keep it so, ask not why
my time is over, while yours is nigh1 -
As if I took a break, and I am not working.
Now I work on the weekdays, work on the weekends.. and I am not allowed to give myself a week’s holiday.
What’s going on!?6 -
I always find it frustrating that additional requirements and changes are added and the deadline is not extended2
-
Why the UI/UX guys don't understand that aligning divs is not that easy???
We cant fucking drag those things ....6 -
Should you not know or not have realised it years after your study: "video" literally means "I see" and "Volvo" (the Swedish car brand) means "I roll" in Latin.4
-
Wasted a day as Shitlock Holmes with the build chain.
It would not reproduce the firmware hexfile that had been checked in. Reverse engineering that along with the mapfile to find out the cause, it was a const string that was guarded by an ifdef from another file that was auto-generated as prebuild step via a script that fetched some version control info.
Or, it would have been if the installation instructions had been correct and someone had described that no spaces in the absolute path name of the project are allowed. Otherwise, that shit just failed silently.
I then had to reverse engineer the intended workflow from the commit history in the version control to figure out that the last dev obviously hadn't quite understood the project specific workflow and how the version control interacts with these build scripts.
At least, I finally did get a matching hexfile.1 -
When a client reaches out to me, I'm like:
404 Fucks Not Found. This is not the web developer you're looking for.2 -
(TL;DR FOR THE TL;DR: **THIS IS NOT AN AD, ITS A SHITPOST**)
(TL;DR: this is a shitpost about an Intuit ad campaign Israelis get a lot on YouTube, those ads are starting to drive me nuts lmao.)
WE'RE INTUIT
WE'RE INTO MACHINE LEARNING
OPEN SOURCE
WE'RE ADVANCING THE FIELD OF TECHNOLOGY TO OPEN FINANCIAL OPPORTUNITIES FOR MILLIONS OF PEOPLE AROUND THE GLOBE5 -
No, the language is not stupid :) No, it is not a problem of the language, it's just the fact that you don't really understand how to use it properly :) i think this is something each of us hates to hear while frustated but needs to hear afterwards, bad design is a posibility tho, but 99.999% of the cases is our fault. face it, nd overcome it! and finally, to grow beyond it 😄
<<edited with my potato phone's standard image editor>>
-
Bing does not understand context at all, I searched PS1 console color to change bash settings, it showed me results about the PlayStation 1 and not about Bash.10
-
Python be like:
TypeError: 'callable_iterator' object is not callable
and also:
TypeError 'callable_iterator' object is not subscriptable
Why the fuck did you name it "callable iterator" if you can't call it, or iterate it.4 -
Windows is not full of surprises. One can expect the (light) blue screen.
(Picture in comments because it stretches like yo mama pussy in the post)7 -
Not going insane due to lack of documentation.
In retrospect it may have been that I was still learning to properly apply and read docs so eh.3 -
Not consistently git comitting (and pushing to repo). Sometimes I wonder if I'm in fact a masochist.2
-
I was in a company (if you can call it that) for 3 months but I didn't exactly have a good selection process and I was even afraid to get paid for the first month. They made me install Hubstaff (or new slavery), I was in a project that mixed too many technologies, we were not clear who was making the decisions and finally they fired me this week, you don't know how happy I am.2
-
These 🤡clowns🤡 are so dependent on me and I'm just sick of it, not to mention I simply don't have the time.1
-
I dun goofed
made a neural net that runs against a simulation. Wanted to run it overnight to get some meanigful stats and insights
But yesterday afternoon I changed something in the simulation and ofc tested it without the nn ... and then forgot to put it back on
So while I expected to come in today and start plotting and analyzing the data while the runs finish, in reality I'm sitting here on a lot of useless data, not knowing what to do.
I kinda want to just start it again and go home7 -
Worst: Not landing a decent job
Best: dev-wise, none really.
It has been a rather shit year, really.15 -
Do NOT try to re-implement input type="number" but with nicer formatting. Do not even think about it. DO FUCKING NOT. It's a trap.9
-
Yo Vanessa? I like, appreciate your interest but can you not let your bots run wild?
On a more serious note: This has happened about 10 times already.
-
Is there anyone here who dealt with gaming addiction? I want real world responses, succes or failure stories. Not some third rate blog post copy paste replies please.18
-
I’m not sure why my dev tools feels the need to change warnings to a foreign language, but thanks Chrome!
10 -
I've read the docs but my tired brain overrided an important detail.
https://haproxy.com/documentation/...
"By default, HAProxy Enterprise will serve these pages only if it initiated the error itself. For example, it will return the page for a 503 Service Unavailable error if it can't reach any backend servers."
I had _the_ return part for interception of the error page from the backend added, not the default override for the error page of HAPRoxy itself.
Took me 4 hours, crying, madness and screaming to realize it.
This week is really wringing the last bits of the gooey slime what should be my brain out...
-.-
Another fun part is that I mistakenly thought the delimiter for multiple strings to an ACL comparison is a comma... It's a whitespace.
acl is_evil hdr(host) -i one,two is wrong.
acl is_evil hdr(host) -i one two is right.
I used to write HAPRoxy configurations blindly, today it was more like writing two lines of codes 100000000 times and still doing it wrong TM.
I need new brain.
Anyone got an offer?3 -
How to relax when you need to do so much context switching, many meetings and then your own work?
My breaks are not enough for recharging me.4 -
I am definitely not sean connory.
I wish linkedin recruiters and devs online would stop accusing me of being sean connory.
Why would I..I mean sean connory, who by the way I am definitely NOT...why would I be on devrant anyway?
For the last time, I am not sean connory.6 -
"Just let me know when you're done (today) with that handful of JIRA tickets that are not reproducible, have no description, and include no error information. We need to get them into the next release."
Yeah. Yeah, I'll let you know real soon. -
Believe me or not but there are some companies that do test their software on prod and ignoring users complaining.
What you think of this?14 -
My body decided to work against me
Last 3 days my “sleep schedule” has been “stay in bed with eyes closed until it’s morning without falling asleep”
If I go insane please tell my dog she was adopted. Ah… insanity is starting to kick in, next steps I’m defending pascal and managers…2 -
I have these gulp tasks to preprocess my css and html. months ago it was all polished and working great.
I run the commands today, npm complains about deprecated something and doesn't let me run... I do updates, I try to run again: "Right now osX is not supported".
I literally did not change anything all these months.
Fuck you npm.3 -
I have just been made aware that not everyone in this community knows the legendary tri-state boolean.
It is impermissible for anyone in this community to not know of the legendary tri-state boolean.
https://thedailywtf.com/articles/..._6 -
I'M SICK OF YOUR FUCKING HURR DURR TRIPLE FAULT HURR DURR PAGE FAULT THANKE QEMU FOR NOT EVEN BOTHERING TO TELL ME WHAT EXACTLY HAPPENS AND FUCK YOU GDB FOR NOT WORKING
-
DoorDash wants its non-driver staff to dogfood the product.
lol. ok.
https://sfgate.com/tech/article/...20 -
Last week summary:
-questioning my identity (I’m cleaning and realised I forgot I used to like many activities I forgot and decided to give them more time)
-questioning how tf my unconscious seems to always plan ahead of me (ah yes I can do this cause I prep… why tf did I prepare for this?)
-questioning my skills (just a standard imposter syndrome, nothing to see here, move on)
-questioning my worth (as above)
-questioning how tf somebody connected to a secret account I have (spoiler: they don’t know and it’s a crazy coincidence… but now I know secrets about them 😏)
-randomly freezing during everyday life for all the above points
Job wise all is cool, tho 🎊2 -
what are personal projects if not the daughters of hackathon solutions that never saw the light of day6
-
MS Teams suddenly not showing couple of days of message history. Just skipped. No blanks or anything. Messages not even that old, it's like 2 to 3 days ago. 🤬7
-
Would you still do your current job even if you had all the money in the world to not work again?15
-
I'm reading "A class-based reflective minimal kernel"
https://books.pharo.org/booklet-Ref...
... do you ever get the feeling like you understand something perfectly and don't really understand it, at the same time? what does it mean?
i can even rougly imagine how this would be implemented on assembly level, but it still feels like... i don't know. it seems too straightforward and simple, i guess, so i suspect i'm not understanding it properly, since it can't be that simple...?8 -
So....
Another machine not working till morning.
That's what happens when the engineer knows a bit how to operate the machines but doesn't have a grasp on how cutting tools work...
Replacing 60€ tools every 4 hours that should last a week is not profitable.
When so many tools are spent that there's no more in stock.
Also manufactor has cutting parameters for a reason... Making the tools work 3 times faster or deeper does not mean profit, means damaged machines and tools.
As comparison, think over clocking a cpu to 7000hz and pushing it to the max 24h a day...5 -
I feel like I am not CS major.
I doble major'ed on 3rd year, so don't have deep knowledge like other 'real' CS majors.2 -
Me: [leaves comment on jira to not delete a file until team meeting tomorrow]
3 hours later...
Junior on slack: I saw your comment, any updates?
We had a meeting for story pointing, and not a sync meeting which is tomorrow.
Literally not talked about, whatsoever -
I am not tired enough to sleep but I am not awake enough to fully concentrate.
It has been going on for 3-4 days. Am I burn out?2 -
What I love about windows is that it's not forcing people to say it's perfect.
Unlike some other OSes. :)12 -
Building your e-commerce looks easy for a dev. Just build a webapp and cry over it not getting hits 🤷♂️.
-
I smell McDonald's cheeseburgers.
Not just any cheeseburgers.... The same smell from the 1980s.
Does this happen to anyone else?10 -
Not sure if reading tech blogs in bed while falling half asleep is a sign of brilliance or insanity.3
-
Should I point out on an interview, that I've been approached by other companies too? will that help me or not? what do you think?1
-
So, I've been with my current employer four years now, three and a half of which have been spent working as a time material developer for a huge fashion company. I've been trying to get out of It for the past six months only for my exit to be postponed everytime. There's also no clear idea as to what I would be moved to, going forward. Nobody Is telling me a thing and I think other developers will be moved to different projects before I do.
That's why I took matters into my own hands and started getting back into the recruitement process. I'm about to receive an offer. A fairly better one.
The thing is, I wanna use such offer to see if my current employer can reedem himself and propose to me a good counter offer. I'm not in the mood of starting over, but I want security and management to have a fucking idea of what my future Is gonna be like at this fucking company.
What do you guys think? Am I playing with Fire?1 -
I think the reason why BigCos simply suck is that there are too many warm bodies that do not care.
I try not to give a fuck but I still do...1 -
Explain to me why CORS isn't the dumbest thing I've ever heard of?
I can make requests from outside the browser but not from within? Hah?7 -
@dfox For some reason, I can favorite my own rants if I send a request to do it manually, I guess that's not... good?9
-
Why is there no language that can run on a GPU, not considering GLSL and the such as they're shader languages and are only used for that.7
-
In Africa,
To get a private company job, you need skills, not books.
To get a government job, you Connections to big people, not books or skills .
To get a scholarship for higher studies, you need books.2 -
Things like Mailtrack are against privacy, aren’t they? Especially because it’s not in the control of receivers at all. Or am I missing something?!4
-
Other teams not related to my project bothering me with some on top requests not related to my project. I have lots of tasks to do in my project. I'll put those to my client hours and tell my client about it. I will not put those in my non office time because during those time I am sleeping to help cure my illness. I need lots of sleep.
-
Me: *applying for software dev roles or product roles*
Also me: *applying for masters in swe or mba*
Also also me: *gets hired as a multimedia dev intern for pissmoney*1 -
Why the fuck can we have nice things? Atom was a perfect match for my work, extremely practical and the extensibility of it was amazing.
MS deciding to starve that project from resources is very shitty.3 -
Having a senior DBA can save hours if not days of struggle and save your back, if you do not know well enough how to do a more complicated query yet, without fucking up something.
Good guidance and experience is worth so much.
... and no I do not have the rights to drop databases.1 -
In the previous company I've worked, we've had about one customer every 1-2 months that had his WorstPress website hacked.
It's a horrible CMS and there is no argument that could convince me otherwise, not even bribery.
Luckily enough for WP, it's not the worst CMS I've encountered... that award goes by far to "The CMS Of Doom™" (name changed to not dox the incompetent company that created it). Fucking bastards. -
I know it !
But when it finally works (reSharper) it's really not 'that' bad.
But my poor AMD Ryzen 9 3900X is not good enough I think lol.
About 30 seconds init time.
2 -
!rant
can you give me/point me to some good example problem/exercise for multithreading? as in, something that's small in scope, but actually requires dealing with most of the multithreading issues & complications? race conditions, synchronization, locks, shared memory access, cross-thread calls/callbacks, etc?2 -
If Wordpress gives you a blank screen of death. Do not check with your frontend developer what’s wrong. Your frontend developer does not have a clue since this is probably backend related3
-
Not too sure why I am required to be in the office when we all know the next code I will be writing is next year.2
-
Any (good) programming courses/presenters ?
Udemy for example is stacked with courses from the one's i bought Wich is more than a few 🙂 only one is really zgood.
What is good?
As All courses i bought having all the information needed, lots of them are not interesting ,not enough hands on project etc.
Regarding user review , as my ampiric experience it's not saying much.
So asking you guys for the courses impacted you the most. Any subject will do 👍2 -
Now it's bitbucket and gitlab that are not answering.
I will get fired because I can't do my job because nothing's fucking working -_- When it's not team (M$ piece of shit) memory leaking, it's visual studio. When it's not visual studio, it's windows. Or WSL. Or Atlassian shit. -
Backend developer does not even sort his API results by ID or name. Damn. I hate dependencies like this. Simple things but they are too lazy to do.1
-
Really minor gripe, but how comes that on a new install of Regolith ping is not installed but mtr is?
I think it's not limited to Regolith... But that's weird, isn't it?
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