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Me: *Applies for entry level full-stack job*
Recruiter: "Sorry, I can't hire you because you don't have the years of experience we're looking for. We can take you on as an intern! Unpaid of course, while we train you."🙂
Clueless Me: "Sure, why not."
*second day into the internship*
Boss: "I have this really big project, and I want you to be the lead. I'm going to be very vague about what I want, so you'll constantly have to make changes to user stories, wireframes, & database designs until I'm satisfied. Don't ask me any questions for clarity, because I'm busy 🙂"
Silly Me: "okay"
Boss: "Also, can you train all the other interns? You're so lucky! You'll get to pick the best to join your team" 🙂
Stupid Me: "okay"
Boss: *emails me a spreadsheet of 80 Front-End interns (freshmen and sophomores)*
"Did you start building the app yet?" 🙂
Me (Dummy): "You haven't approved the final wireframes ye-"
Boss: "And for the other interns' training, what did you have in mind?" 🙂
Me (Dumbass): "I made a training guide, they're already followi-"
Boss: "My project manager for this other project left, guess he couldn't handle the pressure of a real job... HAHAHAHA! You're gonna take the lead of that project, too!"
*Adds me to the slack group* 😁
Me (Imbecile): "Wha-"
Boss: "And we've been having trouble with keeping track of everyone's code. Is there something we can do instead of slacking code snippets back and forth?" 🤔😮
Me (Fucking Imbecile): "Wait, you guys are working on a project and you don't have any form of version control? Maybe we should take a few steps back and plan thi-"
Boss: "Are you gonna take initiative or not!?" 😡
Me (Enlightened): "I quit." 😑
Former Boss: "Too bad... I was going to offer you a paid role tomorrow morning. Oh well!" 😔39 -
I’m kind of pissy, so let’s get into this.
My apologies though: it’s kind of scattered.
Family support?
For @Root? Fucking never.
Maybe if I wanted to be a business major my mother might have cared. Maybe the other one (whom I call Dick because fuck him, and because it’s accurate) would have cared if I suddenly wanted to become a mechanic. But in both cases, I really doubt it. I’d probably just have been berated for not being perfect, or better at their respective fields than they were at 3x my age.
Anyway.
Support being a dev?
Not even a little.
I had hand-me-down computers that were outmoded when they originally bought them: cutting-edge discount resale tech like Win95, 33/66mhz, 404mb hd. It wouldn’t even play an MP3 without stuttering.
(The only time I had a decent one is when I built one for myself while in high school. They couldn’t believe I spent so much money on what they saw as a silly toy.)
Using a computer for anything other than email or “real world” work was bad in their eyes. Whenever I was on the computer, they accused me of playing games, and constantly yelled at me for wasting my time, for rotting in my room, etc. We moved so often I never had any friends, and they were simply awful to be around, so what was my alternative? I also got into trouble for reading too much (seriously), and with computers I could at least make things.
If they got mad at me for any (real or imagined) reason (which happened almost every other day) they would steal my things, throw them out, or get mad and destroy them. Desk, books, decorations, posters, jewelry, perfume, containers, my chair, etc. Sometimes they would just steal my power cables or network cables. If they left the house, they would sometimes unplug the internet altogether, and claim they didn’t know why it was down. (Stealing/unplugging cables continued until I was 16.) If they found my game CDs, those would disappear, too. They would go through my room, my backpack and its notes/binders/folders/assignments, my closet, my drawers, my journals (of course my journals), and my computer, too. And if they found anything at all they didn’t like, they would confront me about it, and often would bring it up for months telling me how wrong/bad I was. Related: I got all A’s and a B one year in high school, and didn’t hear the end of it for the entire summer vacation.
It got to the point that I invented my own language with its own vocabulary, grammar, and alphabet just so I could have just a little bit of privacy. (I’m still fluent in it.) I would only store everything important from my computer on my only Zip disk so that I could take it to school with me every day and keep it out of their hands. I was terrified of losing all of my work, and carrying a Zip disk around in my backpack (with no backups) was safer than leaving it at home.
I continued to experiment and learn whatever I could about computers and programming, and also started taking CS classes when I reached high school. Amusingly, I didn’t even like computers despite all of this — they were simply an escape.
Around the same time (freshman in high school) I was a decent enough dev to actually write useful software, and made a little bit of money doing that. I also made some for my parents, both for personal use and for their businesses. They never trusted it, and continually trashtalked it. They would only begrudgingly use the business software because the alternatives were many thousands of dollars. And, despite never ever having a problem with any of it, they insisted I accompany them every time, and these were often at 3am. Instead of being thankful, they would be sarcastically amazed when nothing went wrong for the nth time. Two of the larger projects I made for them were: an inventory management system that interfaced with hand scanners (VB), and another inventory management system for government facility audits (Access). Several websites, too. I actually got paid for the Access application thanks to a contract!
To put this into perspective, I was selected to work on a government software project about a year later, while still in high school. That didn’t impress them, either.
They continued to see computers as a useless waste of time, and kept telling me that I would be unemployable, and end up alone.
When they learned I was dating someone long-distance, and that it was a she, they simply took my computer and didn’t let me use it again for six months. Really freaking hard to do senior projects without a computer. They begrudgingly allowed me to use theirs for schoolwork, but it had a fraction of the specs — and some projects required Flash, which the computer could barely run.
Between the constant insults, yelling, abuse (not mentioned here), total lack of privacy, and the theft, destruction, etc. I still managed to teach myself about computers and programming.
In short, I am a dev despite my parents’ best efforts to the contrary.30 -
My favorite kind of interview question/challenge is anything that is highly practical for the job. At the current company I work, the coding test/interview challenge was to design and implement an API very similar to the core functionality of the actual product. It’s fair, tests for skills relevant to the job, and is much better than irrelevant silly brain teasers and cs questions, I feel.
In terms of specific questions, one of my favorites is one that one of my colleagues suggested I ask to potential candidates: describe what you think your biggest failed project/task was in your engineering career, and what happened/what you learned. I think it’s a good reflective question that can tell a lot about someone.3 -
about one and a half years ago I wrote my first application ^-^
it generates a little christmas tree with lights on the CLI.
and I still feel the same joy as back then when something actually works out :)
8 -
I'm working on a project with a teacher to overview the project at my school to be responsible for the confidential student data...
Teacher: How are we going to authenticate the kiosk machines so people don't need a login?
Me: Well we can use a unique URL for the app and that will put an authorized cookie on the machine as well as local IP whitelisting.
Teacher: ok but can't we just put a secret key in a text file on the C drive and access it with JavaScript?
Me: well JavaScript can't access your drive it's a part of the security protocol built into chrome...
Teacher: well that seems silly! There must be a way.
Me: Nope definately not. Let's just make a fancy shortcut?
Teacher: Alright you do that for now until I find a way to access that file.
I want to quit this project so bad4 -
There was a time I made an update on one of our client's e-commerce website sign-up page. The update caused a bug that allowed new users to create an account without actually creating an account.
The code block meant to save user credentials (i.e email address and password) to the database was commented out for some reasons I still can't remember to this day. After registration new users had their session created just as normal but in reality they have no recorded account on the platform. This shit went on like this for a whole week affecting over 350 new customers before the devil sent me a DM.
I got a call from my boss on that weekend that some users who had made purchases recently can't access their account from a different device and cannot also update their password. Nobody likes duty calls on a weekend, I grudgingly and sluggishly opened up my PC to create a quick fix but when I saw what the problem was I shut down my PC immediately, I ran into the shower like I was being chased by a ghost, I kept screaming "what tha fuck! what tha fuck!!" cus I knew hell was about to break loose.
At that moment everything seemed off as if I could feel everything, I felt the water dripping down my spine, I could hear the tiniest of sound. I thought about the 350 new customers the client just lost, I imagined the raving anger on the face of my boss, I thought about how dumb my colleagues would think I was for such a stupid long running bug.
I wondered through all possible solutions that could save me from this embarrassment.
-- "If this shitty client would have just allowed us verify users email before usage things wouldn't have gotten to this extent"
-- "Should I call the customers to get their email address using their provided telephone?... No they'd think I'm a scammer"
-- "Should I tell my boss the database was hacked? Pffft hack my a**",
-- "Should I create a page for the affected users to re-verify their email address and password? No, some sessions may have expired"
-- "Or maybe this the best time to quit this f*ckn job!"
... Different thoughts from all four corners of the bathroom made it a really long bath. Finally, I decided it was best I told my boss what had happened. So I fixed the code, called my boss the next day and explained the situation on ground to him and yes he was furious. "What a silly mistake..!" he raged and raged. See me in my office by Monday.
That night felt longer than usual, I couldn't sleep properly. I felt pity for the client and I blamed it all on myself... yeah the "silly mistake", I could have been more careful.
Monday came boss wasn't at the office, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday not available. Next week he was around and when we both met the discussion was about a different project. I tried briefing him about last week incident, he seems not to recall and demands we focus on the current project.
However, over three hundred and fifty customers swept under the carpet courtesy of me. I still felt the guilt of that f*ck up till this day.1 -
Here's a silly side project I've been working on just for fun:
https://soundofco.de/
It "programmatically" creates sound from code (or plain text) on GitHub. I wouldn't call it music, because it sounds kind of horrible almost all of the time :D It's very simple: The length of a line defines the note to be played. Really just a nerdy bit of fun.
Unfortunately I have absolutely zero knowledge in music theory and I have no idea how to make the resulting sounds more pleasant or even melodic. If you're interested in making this better or helping out with feedback, you can find the project at https://github.com/dneustadt/...
Also feel free to share if you find anything on GitHub that makes for some decent sounds :D (I doubt it)12 -
So I've been doing some code jobs now and recently they pushed me to a new level.
This company worked with some silly management app made in cpp which they asked me to edit a little bit giving it another style and some additional functions.
Day 1: this code is a mess.
Day 2: this code is a mess.
Day 3: how does this code even compile.
Day 4: I no longer have faith in humanity.
Day 5: I found my first comment (Yay?).
Day 16: I'm done.
Day 19: I got paid.
If you're making a project in cpp just like that dev you do deserve a punch in the throat.
No documentation, no comments, no patterns, just some thick pasta of poorly written code, names like fCalcAllTaxFilesSizeMB....
This haunts me for real.2 -
!rant
Progress on the ESP32 studio equalizer project! It looks much better and has less stupid silly cables everywhere.
11 -
First day back. I am a junior Dev a year and a half of work.
I get in after Christmas break and find people standing around my desk turns out all senior staff (except CEO and PM who are both non-technical ) are away and an email. Basically saying it's up to me for the next week to manage people.
FU&£&# what the heck I don't have a clue what I am doing and I can't mange if I could I would be a manager pays better. So I designate to people took me an hour to figure out what people can actually get on with. Then PM wants a break down of the plan. Then meeting with CEO over the importance of these projects and told 'politely' shortest deadline to date most work, get it done the company depends on these projects if you don't well it would be the end of you.
Get back to my desk people need work I should be getting on with to do theirs but I have been busy in silly meetings and litrually every 5 mins get nagged 'have I done it yet'. But as I am about done they discover what they should have been working on is doable without my work. I don't shake but at one point today I was shaking so much with nerves I couldn't type. Had a very short lunch and stayed on late sorting people problems out. (Thankfully the even more junior people are nice and 1 did help me at one point today I'm so great full for the help)
I'm a junior no training in the technologies I work with not even before starting the job. £3 million+ worth of projects and possible future client resting on my shoulders... (Thankfully the real project lead and senior members are back next week although won't be long left till deadline) Wtf ...
Anyone got a job going I want out!5 -
Sleep rant time!
As per usual, I got home late and tired, but wanted to keep on with learning to use Electron for a personal project. I setup everything, created the project and began to tinker with it.
One issue, the script I made was not loading, I spent like 30 minutes wondering why, reading docs (it was 12:40AM). When I was about to give in, I opened the index.html file and guess what? I IMPORTED THE SCRIPT AS A FUCKING STYLESHEET.
I laughed like 2 minutes, then shut the lid of my laptop and went to sleep and thought "Oh, so silly"3 -
Signed up on Trello, got everything set up there and everyone has an account.
But my dear PM, why the hell are you still sending out a screenshot of your bloody spreadsheet bug tracker and ask everyone for updates????
Fellow devRanters how do I get (force) my PM to use a project management system instead of silly tables?11 -
“PHP is evil” is not just a joke.
PHP is usually percieved as a language which is not so consistent and has some opinionated historical aspects but allows rapid development because it’s easy. They say PHP doesn’t focus on that “purist shit” such as concepts and “just gets things done”.
Hovewer, this is not true. PHP lures you in and lies to you promising saving time on development, but everything, and I mean EVERYTHING written in PHP is doomed to turn into a bloody mess sooner or later.
You have to be an AI to manage the growing PHP codebase and add features without breaking anything. With every feature it gets harder and harder. If you’re still a human managing a human team, you have to enforce guidelines. Automatic error preventon measures are made of code themselves so the cost of deploying them ona late stage can be ridiculous. And you never deploy them on early stage because you want to “save time”. Your people have to spend more and more time everyday checking on that guidelines. Your development process only becomes slower and slower. If you try to push things, your project will crumble to dust.
To make PHP at least decent, you have to figure out all this by yourself on an early stage. When you’re done, you spent a lot of time creating the buggy, ad-hoc, unspecified and unsupported alternative of what works out of the box in other languages. And you still code in PHP and still have all its disadvantages in your project’s DNA.
PHP is evil because it promises and never delivers. PHP is evil because it lies to you and it already fucked over so many of us.
If you want to code in PHP, do it under your pillow. Code your own silly projects.
If your project has the word “production” somewhere in its plans, PHP is not the way to go.
Amen.66 -
A BIG SHOUTOUT TO MY FRIEND @theKarlisK
He is the real MVP.
We both spent the weekend to setup OpenVPN + Pi-Hole on Oracle free tier.
He hand held me through the entire process, was super patient with my silly queries and in fact explained me everything so well that it got imprinted in my mind.
And ofc, he was super quick to debug and resolve issues and handed me all the commands for quick execution.
Super glad to have worked with him on this project.11 -
What a silly end of the week. Have to continue developing at a project a student started at our company. Today I had a phone conference with the client. They told me there where missing several data. At first I thought it is only a frontend issue but now I know it is a database issue so I have to work through several database procedures which are all undocumented and the student who build those is not reachable. Business integration ftw
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I’m working at an architecture firm these days, so I don’t have many “dev” stories to tell. However, I’d like to share this anecdote to reassure (or demoralize) you all that the kind of nonsense we’ve all dealt with as software developers isn’t limited to the software industry.
I’ve been working on a project to build townhomes and apartments on vacant lots in an urban environment.
Space is limited, so the client assured us early on that they would be centralizing all the mechanical equipment (water heaters, air conditioners, etc.) in the basement of each building. We finally got all the apartments laid out and presented them to the client last week. During that meeting, we get a casual “oh, by the way, we need a 3-foot by 3-foot mechanical closet in each apartment.” Did the project manager push back? Of course not. Have our deadlines been adjusted as a result of changing requirements? Don’t be silly! Starting tomorrow morning, the team gets to feverishly search for an extra 9 square feet in each of a couple dozen different apartment layouts that are already “cozy” in time to meet our next deliverable.
Clients suck.
Changing requirements suck.
Pushover PMs suck.
In every industry.2 -
Earlier this day, I was about to start a new project. So I copied my favourite gulpfile.js into that projects root and installed all dependencies with npm. After running Gulp for the first time it threw an error.
Silly me tried to fix stuff and got googling the error and trying random things... After a break of a few hours I just fucking rerun Gulp and read the fucking error completely. It stood there. The fucking solution just stood there, run "npm blah --force" to reconfigure package blah....
Of course it worked right away and I finally could start working. But this shit took way too long. Why I just can't read the fucking error message. Damn -
In a meeting yesterday working through our WebAPI coding standards, starting from File -> New project..etc..etc.. and ironing out some of the left-or-right decisions so we can have a consistent coding style, working in a meeting room with an overhead projector and sharing keyboard around with one another.
Then we hit the routing 'rules' in the WebApiConfig, "api/{controller}/{id}"…
DevMgr: "Do we need the 'api' prefix? It seems redundant."
Ralph: "Yes it's needed. Prefixing the controllers with 'api' is industry best practice. Otherwise, how is anyone to know it's a web api"
Prancer: "Yea, it's part of the REST standard."
Me: "I don't think so. That is only part of the Asp.Net routing rule. We can put anything we want or take anything out."
DevMgr: "Yea, it looks silly. All the new services are going to be business process specific."
Ralph: "That's how everyone does it. It's kind of the point of why REST services are called WebApi"
Prancer: "What's the point of doing any of this work if we're not going to follow industry standards."
Me: "I understand if the service is part of larger web site, but we're developing standalone services. Prefixing routes with 'api' is redundant. I mean who are these 'everyone' you're talking about?"
<ralph rolls his eyes>
Ralph: "Lets see …uhhh… Netflix?. They're kinda a big deal."
Me: "Like I said, it's an integral part of their site and the services they provide. That's fine. I'm talking about the 12 other 3rd party services we integrate with. None of them have 'api' on any of their routes."
Prancer: "We're talking about serious web services."
Me: "Last time I checked, UPS is a big and serious service."
Ralph: "Their services are a fracking joke" – he didn't say fracking.
Me: "Our payroll system, our billing system, billion dollar companies, didn't have '/api' prefix anywhere. Heck, even that free faxing service we used for a while was a dead-simple routing path."
<I take the keyboard away from Ralph, remove the 'api' from the route.>
Me: "There. Done. Now, lets talk about error handling.."
Rest of the meeting Ralph and Prancer don't say much of anything, arms crossed…I swear Ralph looked like he was going to cry.
This morning I catch my boss…
Me: "What did you think of the meeting? I thought Ralph was going to take a swing at me when I took the keyboard away from him."
DevMgr: "Oh yes…I almost laughed out loud….blows my freaking mind how worked up people get about crap that doesn't matter. Api..or not…who the frack cares. Just make it consistent"
Me: "Exactly…I didn't care either way, but I enjoyed calling out that nonsense."
DevMgr: "Yes..waaay too much."
If I didn't call them on their BS and the 'standard' allowed to continue, I can bet my paycheck when the subject comes up in a few months (another mgr asks 'isn't this api prefix redundant?') Ralph and Prancer will be the first to say "Yea, its stupid. We fought really hard to remove it from the standard...its not our fault...its <insert scapegoat> fault." -
Day 1. Push branch. Make pull request😀
Day 5. Got reply to fix some silly stuff🤡
Day 6. Apply changes. Ask for review again.😊
Day 7. Needed to work for another project for two weeks🤝
Day 25. Came back and pull request and branch were deleted from server 🧐🧐
Day 26. I merge my local branch copy into master and push it to server. So long bitches! 💅💅6 -
How surprising is it when a person designs code in a very clear and impressive structure and just when you think about asking them for guidance, they reveal themselves to be complete turds?
I've been working with this person's "infra" code, at work. I've rewritten some classes to use their infra. I had a vague idea of how the classes work. I had no idea of how their code works. Expectedly, there were some issues but now only minor ones remain.
I asked them for a description of what I'm supposed to do for the few bugs I'm facing. They replied in such a condescending tone, it made me want to punch them through the screen.
Almost a month later, we're still going back and forth with emails. I've been swallowing it and responding calmly. I never got direct answers. Always deflections to irrelevant things or veiled insults. I took it because they did correct one silly error of mine that actually my code reviewer should've caught. (What's worse is that it got introduced by me just before my review and commit.)
But does that give them the right to insult me in front of the whole team including my project manager? I got a reply today from them with everyone of note in cc implying very clearly that I have not done any work. They highlighted a line from my code with some todo tag (that was not meant for them) to make their invalid point. A line that's unrelated to the bug I asked them about. This is after I proved them wrong when they insisted that I had done something wrong about a feature related to the bug.
If you don't understand what I asked for fucking ask me to ask again. But do not fucking try establish yourself on higher ground by pointing out irrelevant things in my code.
I was shocked and enraged that they'd do such a thing. I double checked everything like a mad man. Despite knowing that the fix has to come from them, I was instantly transported to the noob stage, grasping at straws. I wanted to send a really scathing reply right away but my manager asked me to wait.
My mind is now a see saw shifting between a panicked noob questioning every fucking thing I ever did in my nada life and a hungry enraged monster looking to maul that fucking shithead for burning me like that.1 -
For two projects, I have been in a solo work pattern, been a time bottleneck, and been irreplaceable on the projects. Four months ago I told management, "If anything happens to me these projects will be in trouble. I want to train a backup. I can't sustain this momentum. It isn't good for me, or for the success of these projects."
Four months later I still have no backup. They decided to diversity hire some new developers in the wrong area and now there is no money for a backup for me. I can't do all the work on both projects as a solo developer. I could have if I wasn't pushed into doing trial and error development on a poorly defined MS Dynamics API. Since the projects were behind schedule the customers lost confidence in the company to deliver. So the executives railroaded both project managers to save face.
Instead of addressing the development issues they did a bunch of other silly things. I got a job offer lined up and issued my resignation. That news absolutely exploded. After resigning my executive decided to say how awful I am in front of the customer in an attempt to save face for the company. The customer contacted the recently railroaded project manager and asks why. Former project manager tells customer, "You noticed how much faster the development of that part of the application went when he joined. You noticed how much better the quality of the project was. What do you think is happening? Do you think that a very good developer and an experienced project manager are to blame for the failures here?" So the executive is 13/10 pissed off because I may have accidentally struck a death blow for millions of dollars of business. I committed to taking care of the handover to the customer, and the company can't afford to get rid of me without completely losing confidence of the customer. The developers that I work with don't blame me at all and they are disgruntled that executive tried to character assassinate me and realize that it could have been them. I sense that I also may have initiated a developer mass-exodus. So the last few days have been the most stressful of my career but none of it is sticking to me because I followed all of the correct process.
You play stupid games you win stupid prizes.4 -
Visual studio is rather silly.
In one project, just changing the character set to unicode was enough for the program to work.
In another project, exact same code, I also needed to add a command-line argument to enable unicode.
Isn't. That. Just. Silly.4 -
[Working on some really "urgent" report for an about to publish project]
dev: client, can you explain what this value is? we can't figure it out and we though tha...
client: im gonna stop you right there, DO NOT Analyse! we dont have time for silly questions, if the design says there's a 10, just put that freaking 10 in that place...
dev: but sr, we need to...
Client: what did i say? just stop saying things and build it!2 -
Unpopular opinion.
TOML sucks
* it does not claim to care about indentation but it actually does
* nested datastructures are a nightmare, especially 'inline' for 'readability'
* oh fuck me everything must be "double quotes"
* booleans always lowercase, there is no "truthy" here.
* Tables are not intuitive at all.
And all this from working with it first time because I had the silly idea to modernize a python project to use pyproject.toml
Oh and don't get me started on pyproject.toml files. The documentation sucks!6 -
I came into work with a skip in my step and was actually feeling positive for once.
That all came crashing down when a guy I despise who has half the experience I do and even less seniority than I do got promoted above me before I did.
This guy is a talentless, boring, irritating hack who rides the success of others and does everything to glorify his ego. He shits on everything he doesn’t like and no one likes him. I guess that’s why he’s on the fast track to management.
I asked why I haven’t been promoted yet, despite being the technical guru on the team and having professional accomplishments that make his look silly in comparison. Their reason “well he comes in earlier than you”. Well guess what fuckers. I still get my work done and I stay later. Seriously, fuck this place.
This guy also worked with me on a past project. I use “worked” loosely because he did nothing but sit there and criticize everything while doing minimal code. When the company we were doing the work for folded he demanded to be paid his full portion, and I got jack shit despite having done all of the fucking work.
This guy...seriously...why do people who do fucking nothing get the glory? Why do I even fucking try?9 -
C# has become shit.
I work since 2013 with C# (and the whole .NET stack) and I was so happy with it.
Compared to Java it was much lean, compared to all shitty new edge framework that looked like a unfinished midschool project, it was solid and mature.
It had his problems,. but compared to everything else that I tried, it was the quickes and most robust solution.
All went in a downhill leading to a rotten shit lake when all this javascript frenzy began to pop up and everyone wanted to get on the trendy bandwagon.
First they introduced MVC, then .NET Core, now .NET 5-6-7-8.
Now I'm literally engulfed with all these tiny bits of terror javascript provoked and they've implemented in all the parts of their framework.
Everything has to be null checked at compilation time, everything pops up errors "this might be nulll heyyyyy it's important put a ! or a ? you silly!!!" everywhere.
There are JS-ish constructs and syntax shit everywhere.
It's unbearable.
I avoid js like a plague whenever I can (and you know it's not a luxury you get often in the current state of a developer life) and they're slowly turning in some shit js hybrid deformed creature
I miss 2013-2018, when it wass all up to me to decide what to do with code and I did some big projects for big companies (200-300k lines of code without unit tests and yes for me it's a lot) without all this hassle.
I literally feel the need c# had to have some compiler rule you can quickly switch called "Senior developer mode" that doesn't trigger alarms and bells for every little stupid thing.
I'm sure you can' turn on/off these craps by some hidden settings somewhere, but heck I feel the need to be an option, so whoever keeps it on should see a big red label on top of the IDE saying "YOU HAVE RETARDED DEV MODE ON"
So they get a reminder that if they use it they are either some fresh junior dev or they are mentally challenged.20 -
Project Manager: "C++ has become much better for embedded now so we're gonna use it in the new project."
Me: "I didn't C that coming."
I know it's silly but I'm proud of it 🤓 -
How do you guys motivate yourself to finish private side projects?
This is merely a rant about my incompetence to stay motivated until I finished a project just for and by myself... Most of the time I start coding until I figured out how it works and then mostly never touch it again. And this is fucking silly16 -
just started a holiday project. creating a silly game using Processing 2. finally done with day 1 drawing, and baselining.
1 -
Today I had to write some shitty code that should work on ie in compatibility mode which is like ie in Version 6. I only coded on the clients system and never backed up. Silly me. Every think worked so I continued with another clients project. Suddenly my colleague came in our office and told me that the client deleted my code by accident. I never will keep code on client systems only again in the future.1
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A multistage project that includes: 1, A version of Linux that natively supports every existing windows api call by converting it to work with a standard *nix call. 2, a gui for said distro for every flavor of windows 7 and newer that looks and behaves exactly(minus silly errors) like that windows version. 3, a virus that infects the Microsoft servers as well as every isp to identify every windows user connected to the internet. 4, infect said isps and force push my Linux kernel and gui to every windows effectively erasing every instance of the OS off the face of every connected computer. 5, wipe all Microsoft servers of code related to the operating system, but leaving all their other products.2
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Best part of being a (freelance) dev : working from home, being able to see my newborn son slowly growing up. Not easy to run after clients days after days, but I don't regret the silly project managers, the dumbasses from the marketing, and, gosh, I don't miss the CTOs. :)1
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Me - Ooo I've got this idea ! This will fix this "No ones" problem in programming.
(Thinking this will change the programming for everyone)
Starts Coding......
Few minutes later ...Searching stackoverflow for silly syntax errors.
...Finds a 2 years old project from some guy, who already finished working on the idea and answering question as "This is a bullshit idea!, Never try to make something like this."
Me - (Suffering from existential crisis)2 -
I always wanted to become a business man like my dad and I was going to study BBA. Until I saw the tv show Person of Interest, I know it sounds silly but it inspired me to make my own AI system that can predict stuff.
I could not make the machine or Samaritan, but in my final year project, we managed to make an AI system that can categorize emails automatically without any input from the user. The system can create category names by itself and put the emails accordingly.7 -
I just crave to start an open-source project. It's just that I don't feel like doing it alone. Anywone up for doin' something stupid? I have a few silly ideas in mind 😅
(Yeah, I need some other project than work...)
(Oh, right. Didn't feel like posting this over at the collab section. Felt to vague.)7 -
Am currently handling a very bad code, once you add any feature the app crash and you have to fix the whole POKER application ( as you know poker is a really complicated and everything related to each other). The app crash and every single line of code goes wrong. As well i do barely have a break and am working overtime and during the weekend.
In addition to all of this i have a very complicated design and animation to the chips. Adding to this am the only developer working on this project.
Summing-up am working 10 to 11 hours per day 7 days a week. And still the manager is dissing me as if am not a good developer.
I feel so bad, i cant describe how am currently feeling.
So guys do you believe handling a very bad code might reflect your coding skills ?3 -
Hey all,
Need some ReactJS help:
So I was able to redo a browser extension project to fit my needs for my browser proxy project, however for some reason, the original source code doesn't seem to know the Setup class for the setup page. Webpack is not the issue but it seems it can't find the exported class, which makes the browser extension unusable. I hope you can help with my silly screwup.
Extension Source code: https://github.com/sr229/filo/...
I really lost all hope :<1 -
Oh, hello dear PO. You suddenly wanted a change to be done after being silent for months?
Silly, silly you. I'm not some kind of rack you drag out of the closet whenever it suits you.
I am now assigned to another project. Your project can't be completed for months, and it ain't my fault. -
Eclipse deleting my entire project, roughly few thousand LOC and a lot of assets. (Probably my silly mistake, though I don't know what I did)
Good thing I had a half a week old back up2 -
Been working on an Android app for some time. Silly me too lazy to use VCS. Anyway, one day android studio just could not build my project and errors that should not be errors popped up everywhere and nothing I did fixed the problem. Somehow my project got corrupted. 3 hours later of googling and trying to recover my project I had to resort to creating a new project and manually port the old files in one by one :( but all I have to say is WHAT THE FUCK ANDROID STUDIO3
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That time you are programing some project and you just curried a function naturally and you ask to yourself: "Does it mean I know Functional Programming?"
And you put a spoke in your own wheel right away: "Don't be silly".
:P1 -
I don't know is it me or what, but I am really trying hard to get my hands on Vim and trying to get use it for all my daily development. But I don't know why I keep comming back to vscode thinking it will be faster to complete "this one task" in vscode and I will try vim later for other once 😐
Vs code feels more easy to move around project files, working in tabs etc etc. I do try to work on vim as well just for very silly bugs or something but I really want to switch to Vim full time but not able to convince my mind for the task in my hands at that point in time.
Anybody has any advise? I would really appreciate the help on this one12 -
I need advice fellow developers, am I stubborn?
So I lost an argument in my team regarding constant vs variable directly in a method for stored procedure names.
I separated names of procedures into their own StoredProcedureConstants file because it makes it very easy to see all procedures used in a project and refactor their names if necessary. Argument against was that you loose time creating a constant. Am I silly if I am alergic to seeing quotation marks stuff without its designated purpose throughout the code?
Their way is adding var procedureName = "cc.storeProcedureName" directly in a method. I just can't find my peace with it. To me this is a magic string.
Am I being unreasonable?3 -
See I'm a curious case.
Back when I graduated high school my father and I started a startup. We build an Android app revolving around personal safety. It was cool. Had news coverage. It flopped.
In the process off the two months time it took me to build the fucker I had to "Learn" Java and the Android SDK enough to push this app out.
I burned myself out and on top of that I felt like I did not really learn the language. So now years later I want to Learn C# for myself for game Development with unity. However I also want to learn Web Development Properly. Which I have tinkered with on and off since the old days of Xhtml when I built a website for my senior project in HS.
I still feel burned out. Anyone else with a similar feel. I know it's silly being burned after one failed project. But it does not help either that I rushed through learning Java did not retain fuck all and now I feel like I can't learn anything new because mental blockage. Even reading this sounds stupid.
Might also be new shiny object syndrome. Between C# and JS. Lol.6 -
my maven project was working fine in windows but showing a lot of errors in Ubuntu's eclipse. so,I uploaded my to Github & I cloned it in my ubuntu only to find that I forgot to remove a jar from the classpath. I felt so silly afterwards but yeah,I think that was cool! 😋
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As a newbie dev, I'm looking for partners to work together. You know I feel like unmotivated right now for some unknown reasons. So I thought of changing the pace by meeting with some new people who feel the same. By working on some not-real-world-project or silly ideas together, we can learn how to work in collaboration. We can also share some new ideas together!1
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This is a repost of an original rant posted on a request for "Community Feedback" from Atlassian. You know, Atlassian? Those beloved people behind such products as :
• Thing I Love™
• Other Thing You Used One Time™
• Platform Often Mentioned in Suicide Notes, Probably™*
Now this rant was written in early 2022 while I was working in an Azure Cloud Engineer role that transformed into me being the company's main Sysadmin/Project Manager/Hiring Manager/Network Admin/Graphic Designer.
While trying to simultaneously put out over 9000 fires with one hand, and jangling keys in the face of the Owner/Arsonist with the other, I was also desperately implementing Jira Service Desk. Normally this wouldn't have been as much of a priority as it was, but the software our support team was using had gone past 15 years old, then past extended support, then the lone developer died, then it didn't work on Windows 10, then only functioned thanks to a dev cohort long past creating a keygen....which was now broken. So we needed a solution *now*.
The previous solution was shit of a different tier. The sight of it would make a walking talking anthropomorphised sentient puddle of dogshit (who both eats and produces further dookie derivatives) blush with embarrassment. The CD-ROM/Cereal Box this software came in probably listed features like "Stores Your Customer's First AND (or) Last Name!" or "Windows ME Downgrade Disk Included!" and "NEW: Less(-ish) Genocide(s)"!
Despite this, our brain/fearless leader decided this would be a great time to have me test, implement, deploy, and train everyone up on a new solution that would suck your toes, sound your shaft, and that he hadn't reminded me that I was a lazy sack enough lately.
One day, during preliminary user testing I received an email letting me know that the support team was having issues with a Customer's profile on our new support desk. Thanks to our Owner/Firestarter/Real World Micheal Scott being deep in his latest project (fixing our "All 5 devs quit in the last 12 months and I can't seem to hire any new ones" issue (by buying a ping pong table)), I had a bit of fortuitous time on my hands to investigate this issue. I had spent many hours of overtime working on this project, writing custom integrations and automations, so what I found out was crushing.
Below is the (digitally) physical manifestation of my rage after realising I would have to create / find / deal with a whole new method for support to manage customer contacts.
I'm linking to the original forum thread because you kind of need to have the pictures embedded in said reply to get really inhale the "Jira-Rant" ambiance. The part where I use several consecutive words as anchor links to tickets with other people screaming into the void gets a bit sweet n' savoury too - having those hyperlinks does improve the je ne say what of it all.
bit.ly/JIRANT (Case Sensitive)
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There is some good news at the end of this brown n' squirty rainbow though!
Nice try silly little Jira button, you can't ruin *my* 2022!
• I was able to forget all about Jira a month later when I received a surprise vacation home! (To be there while my Mom passed away).
• Eventually work stress did catch up to me - but my boss thoughtfully gave me a nice long vacation! (By assaulting *while* firing me (for emailing in a vacation request while he was a having a bad (see:normal) day))
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"Most successful private project" would be an extension of the webeditor Brackets named brackets-swatcher.
The silly thing about this is that it started out from my own frustration with variablenames in variablefiles in Foundation and Bootstrap.
After a collegue of mine also used it he had a shitton of ideas how to improve and what he wants so i developed it on many weekends with many many beers in my belly.
Where we come to the conclusion - its for sure the ugliest project ive ever written (=> beer and jquery) and i hope i never have to touch the code again - but on the other side i never had bug reports despite the fact that alot of big websites had it in their "Top 10 Brackets Extensions" and many downloads from the Brackets Marketplace.2
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