Looking for a job as a deveoper be like:

Job title: car driver

Job requirements: professional skills in driving normal- and heavy-freight cars, buses and trucks, trolley buses, trams, subways, tractors, shovel diggers, contemporary light and heavy tanks currently in use by NATO countries.

Skills in rally and extreme driving are obligatory!
Formula-1 driving experience is a plus.

Knowledge and experience in repairing of piston and rotor/Wankel engines, automatic and manual transmissions, ignition systems, board computer, ABS, ABD, GPS and car-audio systems by world-known manufacturers - obligatory!

Experience with car-painting and tinsmith tasks is a plus.

The applicants must have certificates by BMW, General Motors and Bosch, but not older than two years.

Compensation: $15-$20/hour, depends on the interview result.

Education requirements: Bachelor's Degree of Engineering.

Hahahaja!

*Manager enters the room quickly*

Manager: Coffe2Code, we have a serious problem on the application, (We are working on a chat app).

Me: What? now just few hours before the Demo?, what is it?

Manager: when I send or receive a media message (audio or video) the sound is not playing, the file seems like corrupted !

Me: that's strange, let me debug it and see.

*Me spending an hour and could not even reproduce the bug..*

Me: Boss, I cannot see the bug, can I debug on your device quickly?

Manager: Sure, here it is.

Me: hold the fucking device, press VOLUME UP, IT WAS FUCKING MUTE. THERE WAS NO ISSUE MOTHERFUCKER.

Manager, oups ok good no issue then, thanks

Not my mom, but my wife's whole family. I'm a software developer.

So we're invited to her grandmother's 85th birthday celebration with pretty much every family member they could think to invite. 100+ people, and we all sit down in a circle in a huge room to watch a video that my wife's father and aunts/uncles put together.

They start the video and there's no sound. I'm a software developer, so I'm not an expert in hardware issues. I try to turn invisible, because every tech person knows what comes next, and this is in the center of a room of people I don't know.

After about 15 minutes of people struggling to get the audio working, one of the people remembers I "work with computer". Soon I have a dozen people calling me to the center of the room.

I begrudgingly make my way to the computer and projector. Upon inspection, I find that the computer is connected via VGA to the projector.

Me: "This cable only carries video. You need a different kind of cable, or you can hook up an AUX cable--the kind you use for headphones."
Other Guy: "I used this cable earlier and the audio was working."
Me: "...that's weird. Well, can we try plugging in an AUX cable?"
Yet Another Guy: "Will this help?" Holds up an HDMI cable
Me: "Oh, yeah! That should do it."
Other Guy: "I tried plugging that in, but it didn't change anything."
Me: "Hmmm..." Quickly unplug VGA and plug in HDMI, then click play.

The sound comes out in its full cheesy music glory. Everybody cheers, and I walk back to my seat. Throughout the rest of party, I'm approached by various other family members who ask me if I can fix X since I'm a "computer guy". Isn't it great to work in tech?

Days upon days I've spent on making this shit. Now the PC doesn't recognize it as a fucking hub, and instead it's just a glorified LED with some audio connectors next to it. What a fantastic waste of time 😑

Since Microsoft is racist and is trying to remove the "master" term on GitHub to "fix the World" I hope they won't forget about the "master" volume in the audio settings of Windows.

WHY THE FUCK DOES MACOS NOT HAVE A FUCKING AUDIOMIXER TO CHANGE THE VOLUME OF DIFFERENT FUCKING APPLICATIONS.

WHY DO OPEN SOURCE ALTERNATIVES NOT WORK AND WHY THE FUCKING FUCK WOULD I PAY 10 FUCKING DOLLARS FOR AN AUDIO MIXER.

THANKS FOR THE FUCKING EAR RAPE APPLE.

How to explain sound to idiot DJs 😅

In our self-developed intranet, i added a hidden script that fires an 'event' when you enter the konami code.

Said event it's simply turning thw screen contrast to 200% and play the audio of 'omae wa mou shindeiru'.

I was planning to make some more of those, but i don't have the time to do them ;_;

*Reads some text about frequencies
"Oh, bass is within 40-100hz. How does it sound?"
*Clicks on demo audio*
*Table trembles*
*Cat jumps high and runs off*
*Pauses audio*
"Yup, that's bass"

!rant.
I've worked for about two months at my (first) job. Its amazing.
We create audio/video software for the products we make.

There are 9 programmers besides me, I'm the only junior. And I'm still learning my way around the code, but they still value my input.

We only do stand ups for 5-10 min, like it should.

One if my colleagues helps me often when I have questions, so I've nicknamed him ducky.

My pm is awesome, he's great at coding and a great manager.

When we work overtime, the department pays for delivery food and drinks.

And we've already gone on 2 trips with the department, mountain biking and a BBQ.

I love my job and I hope that I'll soon be good enough to ask less questions.

A coworker was listening to a Stephen King audio book through headphones on his Mac, so I ssh'd in and used the `say` command to start talking to him.

I love admin rights.

Do you like listening to music on YouTube but are worried about your data usage?

Use this chrome add-on called "Audio Only Youtube" that blocks the video stream and just plays the audio.

If you know this already then good for you!

My Hackintosh project works! The GTX 1050 Ti runs, it boots without USB needed and even audio works!

So... I still go to school.
My English teacher (I'm from Germany) wanted to watch a video with us. There was one Problem. The sound didnt work. My teacher asked for computer Freaks in class. All pointed to me. I went to the desk where the computer was standing.

They plugged the audio output cable for the speakers into the audio input of the computer (that pink microphone input)... 😥 it made some nice sounds haha

Funny thing: other teachers didnt solve the problem before me

I decided to setup a little server on my local network just to make use of a 2TB harddrive I use to store videos.

Told everyone in the house I planned to grow the library over time and that they could access it all in a browser using my system name. It's become quite a fun venture and my video library is shaping up nicely.

Using nginx on a Dell XPS 17 with Ubuntu 16.04 to host a server that just auto indexes a shared directory on my external 2TB harddrive. Kind of an embarrassing rig, but it's just a hobby activity and I do plan to upgrade shit later.

The real fun has been getting to understand a bit more about video files. They used to be magic to me, as complex as their file extension. Now I run a script on all of my torrents which checks the video and audio codecs, converting them if they aren't supported by Chrome's and Firefox's web players, and outputting mp4s using ffmpeg. I feel like I have this stuff down fairly well now. Becoming more and more automated.

Next step is to port forward so I can access it from anywhere, but we'll see about that later down the line.

VLC because it really is damn good. The only player which gives you a nice looking interface irrespective of the windowing system it runs upon - Gnome, KDE, XFCE, MS-Windows, Mac. And that 200% boost in audio is really helpful with files having very low audio.

I received a shiny new pair of Bose QC 35 II's for christmas -- bluetooth headphones with active noise cancelling.

They're similar to the $500 pair my previous boss lent me at work. Lower quality, but much newer, and rechargeable! and bluetooth! Yay!

I paired them with my debian machine, and... it failed. No explanation given. I tried everything I could htink of, but nothing changed. Well, okay; bluetooth came out within the last decade or so, meaning it takes some extra effort in Debian. truth. So I did some reading on bluetooth connection issues, changed some configs, learned how to use the bluetooth cli, and used that to pair and connect them. Worked like a charm.

But! No audio.
Damn.

Cue more research (on pulseaudio this time) and more configs. Did some fiddling, etc. No progress. Also discovered `pavucontrol`, a gui-only (😕) utility which lets you select audio output devices, among other things. It doesn't list the headset. Nor does `pactl list`, but that does list the correct bluetooth modules. It also lists Lennart Poettering's name many many times, for all the good that does. Bragging about building something as needlessly complicated and crappy and buggy as pulseaudio? I will never understand that egotistical doucheballoon.

Anyway.
I paired the headset with my phone in about six seconds. I'm now controlling my phone's music via spotify on my computer. yay. Doesn't work for games or movies, but I can always just plug them in.

But woo!
Noise canceling!
Yay, silence! At last!
and music! How I've missed you!
❤💜🖤

(systemd and pulseaudio can still die in a fire.)

November 2015 - Android users: "How stupid are Apple fan boys paying $100 for a stylus?"

October 2017 - Google releases $100 Pixelpen.

September 2016 - Android users: "OMG! Apple removed the headphone jack! You will have to use a DONGLE! That is ridiculous!"

October 2017 - Google announces Pixel 2 width USB-C for charging and audio playback. Includes a USB-C to 3.5mm audio dongle.

On a holiday, Manager called for a sudden meeting to discuss an unimportant topic.

I pretended that my audio was not working. The meeting ended in 5 minutes and I went back to sleep.

Would the web be better off, if there was zero frontend scripting? There would be HTML5 video/audio, but zero client side JS.

Browsers wouldn't understand script tags, they wouldn't have javascript engines, and they wouldn't have to worry about new standards and deprecations.

Browsers would be MUCH more secure, and use way less memory and CPU resources.

What would we really be missing?

If you build less bloated pages, you would not really need ajax calls, page reloads would be cheap. Animated menus do not add anything functionally, and could be done using css as well. Complicated webapps... well maybe those should just be desktop/mobile apps.

Pages would contain less annoying elements, no tracking or crypto mining scripts, no mouse tracking, no exploitative spam alerts.

Why don't we just deprecate JS in the browser, completely?

I think it would be worth it.

alright very funny guys

i'm so tall my bluetooth earbuds keep going slightly out of range and garbling the audio

Girlfriend: hey, wake up.
Me: Error this interface has no audio input mode. The normal process can continue without audio.

Girlfriend: You aren't even coding.
Me: The interface was running without audio when interrupted. The behavior for audio is undocumented.

Girlfriend: I just want to know if you want to unplug your headphones.

Me: **wearily recalls most people don't refer to sleep as an interface**

"I don't have enough bandwidth to watch the twitch stream, is there a way to get the audio only?"

"yes, start the stream and turn off the monitor"

*sigh*

Our software uses a lot of video/audio hardware. But this hardware goes away when we deliver to the customer.
So everyone was asked to think of a way to be less depended on hardware.
I thought of a very clever idea and I told it to two senior software engineers who both saw much potential in it.

I've only worked here for close to 2 months. And I feel like this is a major contribution if they'll use my idea

Next week at the brainstorm session I'll have to present my idea (informal meeting)

I'll make an update when I know more

Not a rant but it's Friday and thought people could use a laugh.

When I was a teen we used AOL and for those who don't know, it was a test of patience to log on. It had to dial in, actually connect, and then you hoped it wouldn't disconnect for whatever reason. Just getting it to connect would take 30 min or more some days. After you were logged in you would get an audio of *Ding Ding*, followed by "Welcome!" and if you had email, "You've got mail!"

So, I decided to play a prank on my dad by swapping the Welcome sound file with the Goodbye sound file. He was waiting for a long time to connect, getting so frustrated. Then it finally does and he hears:

*Ding Ding*
"Goodbye!"

And loses it. Then he notices he is still online and calms down, confused.

I told him about it later but my brother and I got a good laugh out of it.

Ahh, I found just the thing to cover up that dopey audio branding on my laptop.

TL.DR.: Emojis in commit messages + bad commit messages made by Microsoft™ employees.

Yes, I'm looking at you Microsoft. It would be helpful if I can, you know, understand your commit messages instead of trying to guess wtf _that_ emoji means. That is, if it is the same emoji on my machine. We didn't figure that one out yet. And no, "Some 💄 changes ✨" is not a good commit message, even if you interpret it correctly (which depends on your emoji icon set).

idk about you, but that shitty 💄 emoji tends to be (see image) and I happen to associate that with an XLR audio cable. I had to ask someone else to understand a commit message; a message supposed to be explicit—stating what you changed and optionally why you changed it (you can off-load that part to an issue tracker).

Furthermore, that "Some 💄 changes ✨" commit did none of that. "I made cosmetic changes somewhere for some reason without linking to an issue." If you didn't catch that little detail yet: "COSMETIC CHANGES" is vague as fuck. What is a cosmetic change?

* Does a cosmetic change mean adjusting indentation?
* Does it mean deleting unnecessary abstraction to make the code more readable?
* Does it mean refactoring code to add that beauty factor?
* Does it mean all of the above? Or perhaps a specific combination of these?

Human communication is shit enough, don't make it worse than it already is.

Oh fuck the ROM compiled on first try. WTF ?
Well surely it wont boot.
//5 minutes later after coffee brake.
Oh fuck it booted up no fucking way.
Well but at least something is in place. Wifi not working BT, Camera, Audio.
OK i was worried what did i do wrong since it booted on first try.

MOTHERFUCK. FUCKING WINDOWS DID IT AGAIN TABARNAK!

Today, I was hoping to study some DB optimization for an exam tomorrow. How foolish of me to think that MOTHERFUCKING FUCKTARD WINDOWS WOULD NOT CHOOSE THIS EXACT MOMENT TO INSTALL THE FUCKING ANNIVERSARY UPDATE. Because it di. It took 2 hours to insert it's fucking update in my ass. FUCK.

I don't know why devs would choose to work for the devil, but for those who did create this update system, I HOPE YOU STEP ON LEGO BRICKS AND THAT YOUR AUDIO IS ALWAYS OUT OF SYNC WITH YOU VIDEO ON NETFLIX.

* !rant *

So I've been working since the summer on an app that uses NLP to record audio (I was thinking of using it for school classes), transcribe it and summarize it automatically

I've been using it at school and it WORKS

IT WORKS

I've actually put an app that I made to make my homework and sum classes up and IT WORKS

Windows is fucking amazing... Tried to disable and enable my audio drivers, prompted me to restart, i pressed cancel, fucker still did a restart. Best part is it started to do updates... For fucking 20 minutes until i forced it to shut down. After it turned on i didnt have any audio, enabled it and woo.. Another restar that wantwd to update...
Also happy birthday to devrant and to me

Saw some cheapie little radio in the dollar store, bought 2 of them for reverse engineering. Powered it from my lab bench power supply as usual, and tested whether it actually works before doing anything else.. then I noticed that the tunes were actually quite catchy, so I just ended up listening.

Then I started to notice that the audio wire I was using (the one I've spent a couple of days building earlier) had intermittent audio issues where the right driver would drop out when the wire was held in certain positions. Oscilloscope probing showed that there was some sort of disconnect, with only the 50Hz noise from the power lines showing up. Opened up the connector and noticed that the ground wire had detached. An 28AWG electrical wire that was inside a jack that was meant for stress relief! Yet the copper strands must've detached one by one regardless. What do I need then, huh?! 18AWG which wouldn't even fit on the connector, only to see the strands in that eventually detach as well?! You know what, let's go fancy.. 1AWG which is meant for extremely high current applications!!

At that point I was literally shouting "FUCK!!! Why does this shit always happen to me?!! ONE FUCKING PROJECT THAT FINISHED SUCCESSFULLY, YET STILL BROKE?!!!! WHY!!!!!!"

Clearly I need some fresh air to cool down. On my way to the fast food restaurant to get some Bicky burgers. More shit, humans. One stupid driver who slowed down on me, which of all things I hate the most. GO FASTER ALREADY YOU SLOWFUCK, AND GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY SIGHT!!! Next a pedestrian with a dog.. I swear motherfucker, if that dog comes anywhere near me I'll personally turn it into fucking fricassee.

Ah and then comes the killer.. in this stupid fucking summer, all that's needed to fix any issue is a fucking stupid DESPACITO, right?! More like DeSPASTICo!! FUCK!!!!

.. Back home, rather tired. So essentially a wire that was specifically built to have high endurance broke on me. Back to Bluetooth I guess.

Met this couple at the grocery store. After few minutes we were sharing mobile numbers. An hour later I was at their home. Next I remember switching on their laptop to install audio driver.

This is how people in the society treat me

[Dark Rant]

I'm sick of this stupid tech world.

Don't get me wrong, I love tech. I just can't stand anymore the global brainwashing that we're part of.

Think about all the huge companies making profit on our data. For a better service, yeah sure, but do we really understand what the cost is?

Ok sure, you don't care about your data because you trust these companies and the advantages are all worth it. What about the fact that we are all forced to buy the next new smartphone after 2 years?

Like if removable batteries were a problem for us, users. Or like the audio jack. Because now someone decided that the pricey wireless headphones are Just What You Need™.

Do you think you own your smartphone?
No, you don't. You are paying a bunch of money for something that soon will be just a useless brick of glass and metal which you can't repair. But you'll be happy anyway.

Someone is so happy to the point that they will defend their favorite company, doesn't matter how they decided to stick it into their ass.

Open your eyes, you've been brainwashed.

Almost got my audio settings set up, so close to actually sounding like me! :-D

Ok, I’m over windows. Done with it.

I have been a long time windows, I’ve used most versions since 3.11, and have used Linux for a few years on the side (not as a daily but have needed it for work and servers) but with yesterday’s update, not only have I lost audio for the countless time again, as far as Windows is concerned there’s nothing fucking wrong with it, besides the lack of sound and all.

Drivers are reinstalled, deleted and reinstalled, redownloaded from manufacturer, different drivers installed.
Ran a system restore back to before the update and just dropped the hdd into another laptop (it’s identical model) and still no fucking audio (to exclude the audio chip as failing)

So fuck it, I’m spending my weekend finding a distro that will work, I’m fucking done!

So we ordered a piece of software from external software house becouse I was low on time and we needed it asap.

So. Long story short, their software was bugged as hell, they deny all the bugs and they have their BDD that they done and anything we say about it like "feature XYZ is broken on firefox" they will deny it "becouse it wasn't on BDD" or "let's get on call" (in which +- 6-7 people participate from their side and we of course have to pay them for this...)

So they fixed like 20% of bugs (mostly trivials/minors) Application is fairly small scope. You have integration with like 3 endpoints on arbitary API, user registration/login, few things to do in database (mainly math running from cron).

They done it in ASP so I don't know the language and enviroment so can't just fix it myself.

2 days ago (monday) they annoyed me to point where I just started to break things. For starters I found that every numeric input is vunrable to integer overflow (which is blocker). I figured most of fields are purefect opportunity to XSS (but I didn't bother to do JS... anything but not JS...). I figured I can embed into my name/surname/phone (none validated) anything in HTML...

So for now we have around 25 bugs, around 15 of them are blockers.

They figured it's somehow our fault that it's bugged and decided to do demo with us to show off how perfectly it works. I'm happy to break their demos. I figured I will register bunch users that have name - image with fixed/absolute position top:0;left:0 width/height 100% - this will effectively brick admin panel

Also I figured I can do some addotional sounds in background becouse why not. And I just dont know what to put in. It links to my server for now so I can freely change content of bricked admin panel.

I have curl's ready to execute in case they reset database.

I can put in GIFs or heck, even videos, dosen't really matter. Framework escapes some things for them so at least that. But audio/image/video works.

Now I have 2 questions:
- what image + audio combo will work the best (of course we need to keep it civil). Im thinking finding some meme with bugs or maybe nuclear logo image with some siren sound
- am I evil person?

Edit:

I havent stated this clearly:

"There is no BDD that describes that if user inserts malicious input server should deny it" - that's almost literally what we get from them....

!rant
After nine months of work, my capstone project is finally coming together.

It's an audio server written in Node.JS and MongoDB. I can run it on a pi plugged into a stereo and remote control it from my phone via the web server.

Just received this beast!
I've read very good reviews of this headphone

Had some troubles getting audio to work in Arch Linux. Turns out that it was just muted...

What is your story of your first encounter with a Linux Distro?

Here's mine (Slight long version) –
Back in my 8th grade I used to buy Tech magazines that used to have DVDs filled with random updated contents like Audio/Video tools, Wallpapers and other stuff. There used to be this "Linux Distro of the Month" section that I used to ignore because I didn't know what it is.
But one issue of the magazine had a review of this "amazing new" Ubuntu 10.10. I read it and at first I thought it's some kind of theme for Windows (I know). But then I tried it out on my HP Compaq nx6120 which had a pure BIOS. No UEFI shit. Ubuntu came with it's wubi installer and it installed Ubuntu smoothly like a normal software. Later I discovered that it is a completely different operating system that doesn't run anything from my Windows. I was upset about it and I booted back to Windows.
But I never removed it. I felt like exploring what it was and why people use it.
It's almost 9 years later and I'm so glad with what had happened back then.

This freaking laptop.

The WiFi randomly stops working -- and by that, I mean the hardware is no longer detectable, let alone functional. It simply disappears on boot, even from dmesg.

The same happens with audio and bluetooth: on some boots they simply do not exist.

The power usage is also ridiculous: the battery dies in about two hours, and it gets soo hot. Toasty wrists unless I use my tiny bluetooth keyboard ☹ So I need to fiddle with powertop a bit more.

nVidia drivers are also a bloody pain, and having two graphics cards this is even more difficult to set up. I still haven't managed. (nvidia-driver, bumblebee, optimus, official driver messes, manual xorg configs, ...). So I have a beautiful 4k built-in display running at 4-18 fps, and a non-functional 4k external. That's fine for now, but >.>; frustrating.

In better news! I just managed to get the sound to work by backporting the new 4.19 kernel (yay!) -- I have never been so happy to hear an ad. but fixing the sound killed my bluetooth. (The `bluetooth` utility reports the adapter is present, but nothing else can seem to see it 🙄) So now I'm going to have burning hot wrists all day and want to cry because terrible sweaty awfulness.

Just. It's frustrating.

It's fast, though.
and ever so pretty.

"Time to install Arch Linux!"
*8 hours later*
"Back to Open Suse!"

Repeat every 4-5 months.

Seriously, I would LOVE to get Arch running on my laptop, but everytime I try to something goes wrong, be it bootloader, audio, cooptimus drivers, undetected network card, window manager going crazy, etc etc etc... and I simply end giving up and reinstalling my backup.

Someday, Arch, someday...

I will only sign up for TikTok if Microsoft successfully buys it, then rebrands it as something like Microsoft Audio/Video Social Gallery 2020 (Community Edition)

Today at work I saw 2 tech guys (Russians) that tried to fix an audio system at my hospital clinic.

The PL-3.5 cable was unable to transfer any sound to the speakers from the secretary PC.

So they tried to plug it into one of their phones, to rule out the possibility that it is because of the PC headphones plug.

(The speaker volume currently is on *maximum* btw)

1st guy said "Let's play something nice and relaxing, so the patients (mostly old people) won't get an heart attack"
The 2nd ask "So what should I search in YouTube?"
Then the 1st said "Metallica"

So I recently had a university project which focuses video game audio. We had to work in groups of 3 students and the task was to create a video game which uses audio as a gameplay mechanic.

Our idea was to create a game where you collect different audio samples which get looped as background music, and you have to select the correct ones to have a nice tune. To make it a bit more challenging we had enemies, guns and grenades plus doors which only open if the correct music is playing.

The guns fire on-beat, and the grenades always explode on the first beat of the next bar.
It was quite challenging to get things synced since even small offsets are noticable.

I wrote some nice code and theoretically it should have worked but for some reason the gun shots and the grenades didn't quite hit the beat of the music.

I tweaked stuff, created workarounds, optimized lot's of code to get execution times down but it still only worked sometimes.

I tweaked more and more only to realize that the timing drifted over time.

At that time I worked 20-30 hours on tweaking and trying to get it perfectly timed.

After recalculating some numbers I realized that all the audio samples are recorded at 135 bpm, but the guys who did the recordings said it was 130bpm.

I asked them if it could be the case that the samples are 135bpm and they said:
"yes, they are at 135 bpm as we told you"

I scrolled back in the telegram conversation only to see that they said 130.
Changing the number to 135 resolved all the problems and all of my workarounds and tweaks weren't needed.

So I worked for nearly 30 hours just because they didn't notice their fault and even when they realized that the timing is off sometimes (which took forever because they never played the game), they didn't even consider that they might have given me the wrong numbers.

This all wouldn't be that bad if both of my teammates had worked for more than 15 hours but they didn't. I did all the hard work and the only single thing they did fucked up my workflow. It fucked up the system I created and it fucked up the gameplay as things got unpredictable. Because of their fucking fault I worked as much as both of them combined IN ADDITION to all the other work I did (built 3 maps, coded everything, created animations, ...)

I love working in teams, but only if the whole team is motivated. Those two fuckers were the exact opposite.
Luckily i found the error so I could fix it, but guess with whom I'll never ever work together again?

Every standup, we had to make a skype call to the other office in UK. At that office was the QA lead and for this project she was on our team. One day she came in late to the standup and just looked pissed or sick or SOMETHING. This was particularly strange because usually she was incredibly cheery and "the life of the meeting" in a sense. After everybody's update, she was asked if she had anything to say. She started fucking mumbling some shit I couldn't hear because of the bad audio quality, then she progressively raised her voice until finally she was yelling and cussed out the PM, ending it off with "ALL FUCKING BECAUSE OF YOU, <PM>!!" Everybody was just fucking speechless and confused as fuck. Nobody understood what her fucking issue was, but the PM (on my end of the call) was not taking that shit! "LOOK LADY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOUR COMPLAINT IS BUT THIS IS COMPLETELY INAPPROPRIATE." Blah blah, he gave it to her good, told her they needed to take it offline, ended the call abruptly and then turned to all of us and said, "Jesus Christ, what drugs is she taking?" To this day I have no idea what the hell happened but it's still one of my funniest memories at that company.

Well finally ubuntu 17.04 fixed lot of fucking bugs and kernel 4.9 maybe will add audio so yeah maybe finally functional tablet yayyy

! exactly dev

I'd ditched Windows and spent a while exploring the Linux ecosystem for content creation. And I have to say, it was not a nice experience.

As much as I respect the Linux mantra of "free as in freedom" and "you need to roll up your sleeves and figure out stuff on your own", it just isn't good enough for non-dev work. Sorry guys, but I need software that gets out of my way and at least does what it's supposed to do. I can't stand a horrible UI or delays and random crashes, which is exactly what happens with most things under Linux.

To replace my Windows workflow I used the following:
1. Windows -> elementaryOS (because Debian/Ubuntu repositories seem to have the best software support, and elementaryOS is the least horrible looking thing that supports that) and then Arch, because, well, Arch.
2. Blender + Maya -> Blender + Maya on Linux.
3. Reaper + FL Studio -> Ardour + LMMS.
4. Photoshop -> GIMP + Krita + Inkscape.
5. ZBrush -> nothing :(

As you can see, my use cases are pretty much all over the spectrum.

Firstly, installing and configuring stuff. A pleasure on Windows, an absolute pain on Linux. Everything just worked on Windows, I had to wrestle with library versions and patches and unstable audio layers (Linux audio just sucks, except for JACK) on Linux.

Out of these, Blender and Maya were the best experience. But even then, both would suffer from random crashes that just didn't happen on Windows.
Ardour is actually really nice when it works. Its use of JACK for routing makes it really really flexible, but it just isn't stable enough to depend on. LMMS is utter crap. I'm sorry, but I just hate the UI. Can't stand it.
GIMP, Krita, and Inkscape can't beat Photoshop, even when you consider them together. Adobe software workflow is just so much better and more intuitive.
Blender 3D sculpting is not bad, but it's nowhere as good as ZBrush.

Also, if you're a C++ dev like me, nothing beats Visual Studio 2017. Nothing. That IDE just blows everything else out of the water. Even VSCode. And it's not slow at all, it handled a fairly large project (PBRTv3) just fine on my Windows development VM. Yes, a VM.

So...I ditched Linux and went back to Windows, but I keep Linux as a VM for when I actually want to mess with Blender or Ardour. Or some dev stuff which Windows sucks at (which is becoming less frequent because of WSL).

Out of all the above, the only one I'd consider ready for production use would be Blender. Developers of open source software, please learn from Blender. Kickass UI and user friendly operation is extremely important, you can't make a random window with GTK buttons and text boxes and arcane config files and expect people to use it for serious work.

Also, Windows beats Linux hands down as an everyday OS. It's always been rock solid, if you take care of it properly (and that goes for any OS). Updates hardly take any time because I run it on a SSD. As for all the advertising and marketing bullshit, you can block a large amount of stuff. And for what can't be blocked, well, I just have to live with it, because the alternative is compromising on my creative output, which is too much for me.

I still run Linux on my server, though. And on my embedded devices (Pi, BeagleBone, etc.). It absolutely rocks there.

I realize that Linux software is not going to improve unless we do something about it, so I'll be contributing fixes and code (the joys of being a C++ dev, yay). Still, I feel that the platform and software as a whole is just not mature enough.

Oh fuck... OH FUCKING FUCK OF FUCKS!

So, I made an interview and recorded it with Audacity...

Stupid me only stopped the recording and closed it...

WITHOUT SAVING! I DIDNT FUCKING SAVE THE FUCKING RECORDING! FUCK!

I DIDNT SAVE HALF AN HOUR OF AUDIO! HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN! IT DIDNT EVEN ASK ME TO FUCKING SAVE IT!
or was it??

FUCK NOW IM PARANOID!

Every time user complains about high latency in my Android Audio app:

User blames -> Me
Me blames -> JUCE
JUCE blames -> Google
Google blames -> Phone manufacturer
Manufacturer blames -> Users for not paying enough

So I I opened my college's Tech Fest website to check the events and an irritating music starts playing at full volume.

No bloddy fucking way !
I cant be believe it !
I ported LineageOS to device that newer saw LineageOS support so port from scratch basically.
So i did that. The build was done in 1 day with tiny amount of patches on top of what was in repos already. Basically patches only to build it.
I got the zip and all that jam but i put it away since i believed that it woudlnt boot as its first build ever of LineageOS for this device.
Today i had to factory reset my device since AOSP10 fucked up data partition so i thought that maybe i could flash lineage just to see where we stand.
I flash it.
Reboot.
I see sony screen.
Then black.
OK.
Wait what ?
LineageOS boot anim shows up.
Does the pass 3 times and shows me the final image of boot animation basically telling me it booted up.
OK in my head i was like OK but the UI wont load. There is no way.
I look away at my friend we have been talking with while this happened.
I look at device and see the device fully booted to LineageOS intro screen.
WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK ? HOW? WHY? WHAT ?
(I totally wasnt screaming like a girl and dancing in the room when this happened. NOOO)
We were joking with the devs on different devices that it would be fun if the first build booted up since it required only 2 patches to build properly.
When i told them that the first ever build booted up they were going nuts as i was.
To be clear.
Porting usually takes hours of debugging to even get it to boot up.
Sureee not everything works as is expected. So whats broken ?
Camera, Bluetooth, NFC, Audio (Already building a fix), flashlight.
So there is fair bit of debugging still left but once audio is working then basic functions basically work and i can use the phone daily without trouble and as backup i have my old phone until rest is fixed.
This is the best day of the year i must say.

LineageOS13.0 on my old device. Im coming to fix all your bugs.
Wifi.
Bt.
Sensors.
Camera.
Audio.
All that isnt working.
Lets go without sleep all night to fix it.

Omg Realtek Audio Drivers on windows 10 are absolute dogshit. Installing them is absolute cancer.

I am building a live streaming app.

General public: why don't you use periscope

I am building a photo sharing app

General public: why don't you use Instagram

I am building a social network

General public: why don't you use Facebook

I am build a audio app

Genera public: why don't you use sound cloud

Developer: WHY DONT YOU ALL FUCK OFF I am building it anyway dickhead

Y'know, I'm an audiophile. I want perfect sound, and that's why I want high quality headphones and audio files. I dislike speakers because the sound changes from room to room quite a lot, while it doesn't with headphones, and that would also be distracting when I'm coding. Anyway, that's not what I'm complaining about.

I really don't get it when I download music that has been given out to download for free by the author or recording label, it sometimes comes as a WAV or FLAC. I have enough space on my phone/SD card anyway so gimme lol. Sometimes, I like a song so much, I buy it but often, I never get a WAV or FLAC or anything similar to that. Only MP3 320kbps, WHICH SIMPLY ISN'T ENOUGH FOR MY AUDIOPHILE NEEDS SINCE I CAN CLEARLY HEAR THE FUCKING FREQUENCY CUTOFFS. AAC 320kbps would sound way better (WITH LESS FUCKING FILESIZE, MIND YOU) and its compatibility is also good enough to distribute it as such, but that's something that, again, only fucking free downloads sometimes use. IT MAKES NO FUCKING SENSE! GIVE US PROPER FILES IF WE PAY FOR YOUR GODDAMN MUSIC!

Thanks Google

A Gentoo installation might be fun, but it sure as hell isn't worth it, both in time and effort. Broken audio, broken video, broken stability. A broken kernel that doesn't recognize the hard drive or the network interface. And half a week to compile the fucking thing and it's still not done. This is not the right distribution for me.

!dev but rant

Samsung
Samsung...

Samsung!! What the fuck is wrong with you?
Some longer time ago you earned forst red red flag called knox. What the fuck you mean there is physical diode in phone that will burn out when I do whatever I want with phone? Its my phone. My. I live in europe and european law is with me. Its **MY** stuff and Im allowed to be super user so fuvk off with knox bullshit.

Okay, now, more and more phone are missing critical feature to save few cents a phone. You were last bastion. You were **that** company who was loyal to audio jacks. And why the fuck you plan to remove it? You know what? That one thing brought your phones from one of best (becouse retained audio jacks and didnt do much of notch fuckupery) to literally worst one thanks to knox.

And before anyone tells me bullshit apple tried to say "thats space saving", no its not true to point where one of their very own Iphones had internally space and traces for audio jacks. Its to save pennies on phone for profit margins and to force us to use bluetooth stuff, that I dislike. I stick to my K518 few years now and I am super happy user of it. Why y'all want to take away good stuff?

Oneplus, your turn. Why the luving fuck your big bulletpoint of marketing was "yes, we will keep loyal to audio jacks" and later down the line you shown one big fat middle finger to all users.

Goos job, guys, well fucked up.

So any good modern alternatives for my OnePlus 5 when it becomes obstole in few years? Nope. Fuck nope.

OP7 pro is awesome but no audio jacks absolutely kills off this phone in my eyes to level of not existance and inability to be considered.

Does anyone know of any good audio book sites besides audible? Free ones are good too, of course, but I don't mind paying for them.

Likewise for a good player, since books aren't music.

Shootout to my 2.5GB Maxtor hard drive, that I heavily used between 1997 and 2001. There were no USB drives, and CD burners were too expensive for consumers. So I used to open my PC case, remove the drive (along with Windows and my software), bring it around at my friend's house and have fun while copying hundreds of mp3s, patiently downloaded from filesharing and 56k modems or ripped from CD audio, in and out.

One time it fell out from my desk, hitting hard floor big time. I thought I lost it forever, and basically my whole PC in it. Then I tried plugging again its IDE and power connectors, and it was still working! ... well, half of it. That badass still continued to work with one of its two platters crashed, and got some more mp3s with it.
Maybe I still have it...

I know Google isn't the worst company in the world. But some of their data tracking just seems a bit odd. Such as keeping audio logs each time you use Google on your phone. Or when it picks up random bits of conversation. Along with them keeping track of where your going, and where you have been. Even if Google maps isn't running.

And one of my all time favorites is when Google Allo was a thing, it used to have access to my camera randomly without actually opening the app. My phone will tell me different logs each time Allo opened the camera without my permission.

I know they need to collect data in order to advance some of their fields of tech. But it just seems a bit intrusive when companies like Google do this.

some best python libraries for audio manipulating.

I've fucking had it with youtube, fucking jizz slapping knob butlers. I'm going to setup a mirror on my server, the idea is:

- Setup a youtube-dl cron that fetches multiple times a day both audio and video versions of the music playlist I have, hopefully with some sort of progress tracking of each download and total, so I could check if it has run successfully and have a nice dashboard, might need to do that myself (except if compactd proves itself to manage that all)

- Need to figure out a way to download the "best" quality but not go beyond 1080p, since if some videos for some reason are uploaded @ 4k, that'll be a waste of space

- Have Compactd/Funkwhale/Koel as the music player frontend for the audio version of the files, preferably one of them should offer download of the files too, so I could have a similar setup to spotify, though I could probably also just have some filebrowser installed or have a password protected index.

- Not sure what to use for the video versions, since sometimes the video goes with the music; plex? emby? suggestions are welcome

- Saw somebody (ab)using google drive as their backup for all the music they download, so I want to setup something similar, rsyncing all videos and music to some account, so in case shit majorly hits the fan, I can just download everything back

Programmers who work on audio/video or picture software are those I am most impressed with, either that or kernel devs!

Spent an entire day just compiling a kernel with audio codecs for my cherrytrail laptop, first on my server for 9ish hours, then on my laptop, ended up deleting it all and starting over, because the final folder was 20+ gigs big (without modules) and the next instruction was to transfer all those files to what is a 32gb laptop, so I thought I fucked up, now searching more, it seems I just need the vmlinuz file once it compiled, I guess I'll compile it all again...

Finally got my Bluetooth earphones!
It's called Pamu Scroll, funded in Indiegogo.
I bought it for $49 without shipping fee.
Now let me write a review about it here after using for about an hour or so.

1. Shipment
Shipment from China is slow and hard to track unless it is classified as EMS, which mine wasn't, obviously.

2. Packaging
It has some shock protection layer, but without that, nope! It was staying still inside the packaging though.

3. Design
Beautiful. Just beautiful. Period. Just see the picture below.
It opens as a papyrus, maybe that's why it is called Pamu Scroll. Both the case's end, and earphones itself has magnets to hold each other.
It has a leather feeling to both the inside and outside of the case, and the touch control area of the earphones is also leather feeling, adding a nice touch that differs with other earphonnes.
The diamond feeling finish in the end of the case makes the case itself isn't earphones, more like some expensive jewelry case.

4. Fit
My ears are smaller than most people, for I am young, so it sometimes fall off when I jump, but when I put it the correct way, never falls out.

5. Audio
I am not an audiophile. I don't really care about the audio quality and how it sounds like unless the sound is too cringy and has so many white noise.
This earphones has white noise, but just a little bit, you won't notice except when you are in a quiet room.
The bass is boosted, but low sounds, and vocals can be cringy sometimes, so I should manually tune them with my phone's equalizer.

6. IPX6
Not tested yet, but they advertise as using it in the shower.

7. Stereo call
Yup. Stereo call. Call in both ears. But only right microphone seems to get the voice.

8. Pairing
Using BT 5, it is a breeze to connect.
Take both of them out, put to your ear, then ding! "Connected"
Done.

9. Charging
with micro-usb
wireless charging for optional purchase - 10 bucks

10. battery
Reasonable amount
You have 3.5 hrs of listening time in both ears, and you can charge 2 times more each by putting in the case.

===============

Overall, it is awesome and let's just pray it doesn't break for at least for an year.

One side note, I can activate assistant by double tapping in the left ear (yes it is touch control), but my S8 asks me if I want to customize with Automate/Tasker. Yup!
Will share that later as well.

If you have any questions, ask me! Thanks for reading my first ever product review in devRant! <3

I was wondering how people can hate other people. That was weird to me, but now I unterstand these people.
I begin to hate people, too.
Not only because they are stupid, but also because of their irresponsibility, ignorance and incompetence.

Here I am taking my time to finish a school project which is to create a video about stock shares etc.
I did the planning, did the editing of the audio files, put my own part (imagea and own audio) to it and right now I am editing it.
One guy from our group is being a bitch and does not record his voice to a few documents which will barely take him 3 minutes. I did 8-9 minutes of talking, for the records.
Because of that dip shit, I am wasting endless time waiting for him to get his shit done. I need to create the video. I have a personal life, too.
I gave him a deadline, because he was procrastinating. If he does not make it to this time, I am going to record his part on my own and give myself all of his credits. Done.

FUCK! The fucking previous dev on this project who set up the fucking web service that he knew would be shared among multiple platforms set it up to use an audio format that's only supported on one platform. Now I'm faced with either doing some fucking JS black magic to decode the fucking base64 audio, convert it to another audio format, and then possibly re-encode it or attempting to re-write the fucking web service and already in production app! Fucking hell!

"Non-devs never call Steven Spielberg to have their TVs fixed."
But sure they MUST call a dev to update their Android, iPhone, Windows, installation of Anti-virus, data recovery, malware removal, to shortlist 20 laptops from market, ask for what printer to buy, why is there a weird animation in Android sometimes, come borrow my WiFi, have their phones and computers fixed, RIP old audio CDs (yes!), fix Bluray, fix anything electronic, repair their bike, teach them science, politics...
This While True loop never escape.

Fuck Windows 10. Period.

An amateur shit-show of junk. If you have an i3 processor it will find a way to choke it to 80% with the bloody audiodg.exe.

I have an i7 and takes 25% CPU from Windows Graph Audio Isolation to play a YouTube video and 12-13 % when idle.

Junk spaghetti with some half-useless UI over the same settings that were available in much older Windows versions.

I hate having a decent 16 GB ram, 512 SSD and Radeon and so on laptop, for it to be disabled and abused by Windows and Chrome.

Saw a reddit thread earlier asking about the most unsettling shit that people have found out Google has on them by downloading their data. I saw a bunch of comments about people finding voice recordings that Google had taken. After reading these, I was wondering what I could find from downloading my data. Decided to download my data, and on the page for it I saw that apparently I had disabled location history, audio activity, and device information.

Knowing companies like Google, I wouldn't be surprised if they didn't stop recording that stuff, just that they're not providing it to me. There were zero voice recordings, but there was location history up until about the beginning of 2017.

Another thing they have is all the pictures from all of my hangouts chats. Apparently there had a good amount of older pictures of myself in there. Going back to probably 2-3 years ago, when I had my emo hair. Just a bit of a throwback. One picture I saw was from last January, when my hair was reaching my chest. Made me really miss my hair.

Other than that, nothing that interesting. Just something I thought I'd share.

OK. This might sound incredibly stupid. But still...
I decided to help a friend of mine with asp.net assignment. I just know c# and he didn't attend classes. So he came to me with some pizza and beer. So we managed to finish the assignment. In the end we had to add audio to web page and I didn't know how to do it(I've never used Javascript until that moment) . So naturally I googled and tried literally 10 different methods to play audio and none of them worked. I lost my mind and hit the table a bunch of times. After 2 hours I realized that I was wearing my second headphone that is not connected to my laptop and audio is playing on my primary headphone as expected)

STOP sending me fucking videos of the bug you are experiencing. I don't get paid as much as I do to sit around and watch your stupid fucking screen captures for 37 minutes just to find 30 seconds of meaningful information to reproduce something you could have put in a paragraph and emailed to me.

Either you meet me halfway and actually understand the expected outcome and how it differs from what you experience enough to verbalize it, or I ain't fucking fixing your shit. For fucks sake, a 40 minute screen recording with no audio does NOT count as a valid reproduction.

I went for an interview yesterday and everything went fine, today I was asked to complete a technical test. I have done plenty of these in the past but never have I come across something as invasive as interviewzen.

It records every key stroke and plays it back to the interviewer, I assume they are watching on the webcam and recording audio too. I find the whole concept horrendous.

I closed that shit straight away and will tell them I'm no longer interested.

Anyone used that site before?

Apple fanboys justify the removal of audio jack as simplification of design. How the fuck am i supposed to find those damn pods if i misplace them. and what uf your bluetooth pods are shit and i want a different one. Fucking idiots.

I don't know if this is a problem only in Belgium or also in other countries but while I love Bluetooth for audio playback (headsets, speakers and everything) despite being extremely convoluted as a protocol.. FUCK Bluetooth keyboards.

Several of them I've tried. Several of them, from various brands. Pairing, setting the Belgian keyboard layout (which on that shitty Android 7.0 tablet that I want to use the fucking things with apparently has to be done *every fucking time you connect*, because reasons) all well. Except half the keys don't fucking map properly. A keymap, it doesn't get easier than that! How hard is it to make buttons map to the right keys!? They're literally fucking push buttons on a matrix! Seeing which points in the circuit make contact and sending that off to wherever it needs to go!

And to put the icing on the cake? USB keyboards with the same fucking layout settings work without any problems. So it's extremely likely that it's something in those shitty keyboards' controllers or Bluetooth going full rart on all of them.

Of course, Bluetooth being as convoluted as it is, manufacturers just copy each others' implementations of it if they can.. so there's that.

Can really nobody make a product halfway decent anymore before putting it on the market!?

Another one bites the dust.. JUNK!!! Every single goddamn one of them!

! Rant

To any games programmers here (I feel so lonely surrounded by these Web devs)

If I tree falls in a scene with no audio listeners does it still make a sound...

>watching Channel9
>display goes black for no reason
>cable was unplugged a little bit
>display starts working
>audio stops working
-_-

Well, it took me 7 hours but I finally made it.

I have a functional Arch Linux installation on my new laptop.

oh except the audio fails from time to time but it'll work eventually
and my hard disk starts clicking whenever I reboot even though I keep disabling its "power management"
and for fucks sake will you please mount my usb when i tell you to
and my touchpad doesn't work

but I can code and play games on it so whatever it's functional

Art issues and syatem server crashing fixed finally. Audio policy issue will be hopefully fixed soon and then hopefully bootup

I have not gotten a new phone in years. I am happy with my current one but unfortunately you need fucking at least 4gb of ram in your PHONE to run apps nowadays so it freezes frequently.

Watched the launch event for the OnePlus 7 very impressed. Price: high but not too high.

What they failed to mention, and I only found out a few hours later from a reviewer (Linus) is that they removed the audio jack. Come on guys that's just a dick move.

There are still enough redeeming qualities that I will purchase the device (90hz amoled 1440p 93% screen display? *Drooling*) but I am disappointed and feel slightly conned that in your detailed, 30 minute overview of the phone, you avoided mentioning this.

When your on the toilet and come across a tech video you want to watch but can't because of the audio. It would be weird... need to start taking headphones to the john.

How deep does the rabbit hole go?

Problem: Convert numpy array containing an audio time series to a .wav file and save on disk

Error 1:
Me: pip install "stupid package"
Console: Can't pip, behind a proxy

Me: Finds workaround after several minutes

Error 2:
Conversion works, but audio file on disk doesn't work
Encoding Error only works with array of ints not floats
BUT I NEED IT TO BE FLOATS

Looks for another library
scikits.audiolab <- should work
Me: pip --proxy=myproxy:port install "this shit"
Command Line *spits back huge error*

Googles error <- You need to install this package with a .whl file
Me: Downloads .whl file <- pip install "filename".whl
Command Line: ERROR: scikits.audiolab-0.11.0-cp27-cp27m-win32.whl is not a supported wheel on this platform.

Googles Error <- Need to see supported file formats
Me: python -c "import pip; print(pip.pep425tags.get_supported())"
Console: AttributeError: module 'pip' has no attribute 'pep425tags'

Googles Error <- Use another command for pip v10
Me: python -c "import pip._internal; print(pip._internal.pep425tags.get_supported())"
Console: complies

Me: pip install "filename".whl
Console: complies

Me: *spends 30 minutes to find directory where I should paste .dll file*
Finds Directory (was hidden btw), pastes file

Me: Runs .py file
Console: from version import version as _version ModuleNotFoundError: No module named 'version'

Googles Error <- Fix is: "just comment out the import statement"
Me: HAHAHAHAHAHA
Console: HAHAHAHAHA

Unfortunately this shit still didn't work after two hours of debugging, lmao fuck this

Decided to install new CentOS to prepare for Red Hat exams.
a) had to disable VirtualBox Audio and USB otherwise it got stuck during boot (lvm2 masking did not help)
b) First command - "dnf update". Crashed in middle of the process and completely screwed dnf/yum (TWICE!). Went through just fine when executed from runlevel 3.

So far it held up to the name Enterprise Linux because this is the exact out of box clusterfuck I would expect from a corporate.

!rant

Our implementation director got bored since yesterday. So, I decided to let him barge in with my colleague and let him manipulate the audio speakers. Things got funny and asked me to code properly so he can take a shot and send it to his friends. What I did, I copied and paste the code and saved as .bat to make the console looked like the matrix while coding. 😂😂

We had a video conference with some external collaborators. The boss treated them as clients but I didn't realize that, so I thought I could be honest with them and I said that the efficiency of the system could still be improved.
The boss suddenly stop the audio (but not the video) of the call and yelled at me: «You mustn't say that our system is not efficient!»
The team on the other side clearly understood what happened.
I spent the rest of the meeting staring at the wall.

Why does Linux Bluetooth audio not work properly!!!!
I have been using Linux on my laptop (moving from macOS). I got so used to Linux, and I love it so much at this point, but I really wanna use my Bluetooth speakers (subwoofer ❤️❤️).

So, now, I have to use OSX again and I am actually disliking it.

WHHHYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!

This happens when a Tech channel on YouTube faces audio problem while going live!

when your headphones get a new terms&service with an alexa assistant update and it becomes clear what the purpose of this product has become.

SONY W1100XHe Adphones.
so it plays audio ads now? 😆

Twitter like social media platform but people will be posting audio clips of 10sec maximum.

Handed over my first client's project today.

It was revamp for an internet radio site and also the first project that I used Bootstrap 4 in. On top of that, it was the first time I have to deal with PHP and its loops.

Despite audio player errors (somehow, they lost access to the streaming host and hence no audio source), I'm more or less satisfied with the final outcome.

But wait, why that stupid icon is not vertically centered?

So, I'm obviously very intelligent when it comes to hardware!

Me, being this "intellectual," fucked up one of the cables (and by that one of the pins snapped off) connecting to the motherboard. Wanna know the consequences of this idiocy?

My front audio/USB ports are NO LONGER WORKING! I'm now reduced to using a USB audio adapter and ports in the back of my computer.

Christ, now I remember why I never fucking touch the hardware inside my computer.

So I installed the JACK audio connection kit on my Linux box, set up drivers, configured routings properly, etc etc.

Tried playing basic sounds. No output. Panic.

Redid configuration, tried again. No output. Panic++

Reinstalled JACK, tried again. No output. Panic++

Reinstalled drivers and checked ALSA (audio subsystem). All good. Tried again. No output. Panic++

Hit the Mute shortcut on my keyboard to unmute my speakers, tried again. Worked. :facepalm:

I am such an idiot, fml.

So I work for a store that sells audio and video equipment. My boss asked me to find old stock that is in our system but not on our site.

We have an event at one of our stores in a week. I made a simple quiz - where people can fill out there email and win... something.

So going through the old stock we found something random, and my boss had the "great" idea to use that as the price for the quiz.

Guess what it is...

nah you won't

ITS A FUCKING TEAPOT.... I AM NOT KIDDING YOU - our audio video store is giving away a teapot as a price!?!?

Typing 2 pages of sprite codes from a magazine, then saving the little game onto an audio cassette...

Jeez maybe it's just me, not a very smart user, but after at least 6 years with iPhone5, just before changing it, I discovered how to raise the volume without logging in the phone first:

I press the home button, Siri show up, and THEN the fucking raise/lower audio buttons are working.

6 years typing the fucking pin just to raise the volume.
6 fucking years missing notifications and calls just because I forgot the fucking volume on the lower tone. Almost lost a girlfriend for that.

Switched from Android to iOS. Been using android since 2014 and now I’m on iOS 13 on the iPhone 11.

It’s pretty nice overall but there are somethings I really miss. YouTube vanced with its background audio and cracked Spotify were godsends. From what I’ve seen, adblockers only really work on safari but safari actually works just fine and it looks really nice too.

I can still use 1.1.1.1 as my dns and have adblocking, I love it.

Pip is something I thought I’d miss but found that I really didn’t need it.

Sound and notifications are a big pain tho. Only one channel of audio? Cmon man. And notifications on iOS are a bit of a mess.

Control center is very very nice in terms of functionality and aesthetics.
Speaking of, everything in iOS just looks so good. The UI/UX Is incredible.

The display on my iPhone isn’t better than my s8 and some YouTube videos look kinda wack even at 1080 and even some nice photos I took on my s8 looked sucky ish. I think a big reason why the “android camera sucks lmao” meme still exists is because most iPhones have low pixel density and are maybe biased to make iPhone shots look better? Idk tho

I used to disable animations on android but iOS animations are very nice.

Shortcuts app is very cool, very integrated big supporter of this.

Okay, if you have a video on your website how about you not blast my ears when I go to your site. Load it muted. I along with the rest of the world know how to turn on the audio if I desire. If you are not starting off muted; you are a jerk!

I hate that I have to have windows for my music production hobby. Does anyone know about any good DAWs for Linux?
Maybe I'll need a new audio interface as well though. Yamaha is about as bad as Nvidia when it comes to drivers for Linux.

In a recent venture, I had to use an office suite and a photo editing software regularly. As a Linux user, I tried using Libreoffice and gimp. But that was just a mess. My other project partners were using MS office. Format, image alignments, fonts.. everything was messed up. Same happened wih the gimp. I know Photoshop, learnt while studying. Gimp was just no match to that. I was forced to go back to Windows. And I was surprised that the latest MS office and Adobe Creative Cloud were excellent. MS office was smoother and faster than Libreoffice.

I love linux. I have tried all the major distros and I love all of them. But I would still say that Linux is not the best option for day to day non-dev tasks. Whatever Richard Stallman and the Open Source Community say, Linux lack good softwares, at least some good document, photo, audio and video editing softwares.

It happened with a company that makes the audio Codecs for Apple (you guessed it right).
It was supposed to be the most pleasant interview ever but not exactly. Here's the thing, the interview went so well that the HR explained all the benefits for its employees and handed me a copy of a leaflet containing so. In the end, as they were walking me to the door, the HR lady told me "you are staying here, you don't have to look anymore" as they were walking me to the door.

Well, everything I did from my end was perfect. Thank you emails and follow-ups blah blah. But not a single answer from their end regarding any decision.
This was the worst feeling to me.

Starting a new audio book. Figured this would be a fun listen.

You know what scary? In about 10-20 years, We will perfect 3D renderings of people like the president, coupled with AI being trained to replicate vocals of humans.

I believe once this happens, Something should be in place where using a famous persons face/voice should be copyrighted or something.

Core Thread[20741]: segfault at 0 ip 0000000000000000 sp 00007faacbff7e98 error 14 in spotify

Dude, please handle being not able to open an audio output... :(

Oh Thank You for such a helpful feedback! I have added images of kittens in next update of my audio processing application. Hopefully you will like them?

Even though I screwed up my front audio, I can die happy.

Finishing half a days work while waiting for some linux user to get the audio working for a video call.

Lately my sister's sound wasn't working. So i came over to see, whats wrong. Her boyfriend was also there, who claims to be a programmer himself, so i asked myself why he hasn't already solved the issue. But instead of asking, i just got on her computer and looked around.

First, i checked the audio jack, which was plugged in normally. There's a little wheel on the table, controlling the volume. There was a little light on it, shining. I assumed, it had to be a software problem and got into Windows' Audio Manager. Everything was okay. I spent the next 10 minutes checking EVERYTHING, even tried a restart (obviously changed nothing, but you never know ;D ). Drivers, Audio Settings, everything was okay.

Desperately I leant back in the chair and shot some looks around. Turns out, the plug wasn't plugged in. *facepalm*

The little light, shining on the wheel, seems to get its power through the audio jack.

It's always the simplest thing.

When windows update breaks external audio card 😫

wk142: geekiest non-dev activity

Definitely music production. Especially when using real instruments and capture their audio, so everything is quantized (i.e. fixed to time grid) and very tightly recorded. I make metal, 'tis a precise genre. For one riff it sometimes take 20 takes, since I record 4 times my guitar.

I've learned for the past 10 years how to compose, mix, masterize, but also learned how to sing, learned how to play the guitar, learned how to compose drums and using my keyboard to play drums (people are often surprised I can play double kicks @ 230 bpm) so that I can have a basic drum layer to further edit

Pretty geeky, not a common subject I talk to people about :D

Audiophiles here?

My Beats In-ear earphones just died, after 3 years of pretty frequent use. The cable is broken and one side is dead and the other side is flickering. Now I am looking for a replacement. And I hope that someone here can suggest me something that fits my needs :s
First question would be wireless or cable. I am not to sure yet, I think I'd prefer cable because I don"t need to charge them and the possibility of loosing them is not as big. However I am open to wireless earphones as well, since they are pretty good to listen to music during workout.
I want my earphones to have deep bass and clear highs.
One of the most important aspects is durability. If its a cable earphone, I would prefer something with strong durable cables, nothing flimsy that breaks again in a short time.
Oh yeah and the price shouldn"t break the bank, I am thinking about something <100 euros.

What would you guys recommend me?

Imagine a multi driver high quality balanced armature earphones. They have stainless steel ear channels and replaceable meshes. They’re also made by apple. Seems impossible in AirPods era?

No. Apple made them. They are really good and extremely comfortable. They are rare nowadays but here in Russia I just bought brand new pair for just $50. They sound awesome.

I listened to JH Layla and everything by Noble Audio. This forgotten apple earbuds still sound awesome.

It’s not a 3am rant. They actually exist. I have them.

So I gave i3 a try today via Manjaro i3 (don't have time to get a config of my own from scratch, would rather have a working setup which I can fiddle around with).

It's pretty...good actually. Doesn't work quite as well as I'd hoped because of my laptop's small screen, but still nice. Works well with my Blender and editing workflow too, so that's a plus.

After I'd spent an hour fixing audio and WiFi issues, of course, because Linux, but then that's just part of the fun amirite

One of my hobbies is to repair stuff.

In front of me is a Xiaomi Notebook air 13.3", a very nicely build device.

But it's driving me nuts, the screen is completely glued onto the front glass.
How the fuck am I supposed to exchange that display with a new one?

The main problem with those devices seems to be the display-cable in the hinge.
It might short 3.3V to 19V backlight, killing the display, the hdmi controller and the audio-chip.

2 ez fixes so far, but that fucken display.
And the absolute worst is that there are 0 official replacement parts available for any of the Xiaomi notebook's.
The fuck!

Discord...

Okay, I have a lot to rant about discord, but today, exceptionally, to the point.

I have my dedicated server. It has uptime last 3 years better than 99,99% (was down 15ish minutes for maintainance and RAM upgrade and like 10 minutes down becouse hoster's generators failed to trigger when there was outage)

This year it was up 24/7/365.

Why am I saying it?
Well, my TS3 server is up 100% of time this year. Yet still everyone moves to discord and suffers brutal audio quality and audio lags, and outages like right now. Its not first time this year and recently discord was acting up before. Today they scored bigger downtime than my dedi server (thats not redundant, not distributed nor any fancy "uptime helpers") last 3 years.

Why the fuck people prefer discord to ts3 other that it allows to upload images more conviniently? Okay, it looks nicer, and is like 10 times heavier on machine, but other than that? Its beyond me.

E: fix typo
E2: fix typo

Is it just me or is the Audio driver for Antergos WAAAY better than the one on Windows? Big diffrence for me at least.

Also, huge thanks to whoever made devRantron available on AUR.

I fucking hate Visual Studio!

Don't get me wrong, from time to time I actually enjoy it but not today.
It all went south when I tried to add a new handler to an fucking old asp.net webpage. I had the access the 'Range' headed to stream bits of audio and video files to the client. It was working absolutely fine for the first hour and a half, after that point the fun started...
VS decided that my source code and the binaries won't match anymore. Everytime I tried to add a fucking breakpoint or debug this cunt of an error it would just refuse
The worst part that made me go apeshit was when I finally got a breakpoint and the exception. Some unknown fucking system dll just kept on killing my thread without a proper error message because it's optimized to the fucking moon and back!

Any ideas from the devs here on what's going on and how the fuck I can fix this?

[linux distro stuff]
Hey guys!
Im considerig switching to linux because:

My macbook does not support mojave and the new ones are expensive af.

Windows 10 is bloated and not a great user experience(removing stuff from the control panel and adding it to the very stripped down settings app, privacy etc..).

I love open source software

However i did not used linux for a long time, back then i used ubuntu and SUSE.

My considerations:
Debian - because .deb on them haters
OpenSUSE - because i used it in the past and it seemed very stable and fast
Arch - i heard from a lot of sources that it’s “da best”

My use case is game development and 3D modeling. I use gimp, blender vscode and unity (the game engine) at work i sometimes use autodesk stuff (motionbuilder, 3ds max) because of fbx.
For audio stuff i use audacity

So overall i’m looking for a distro that is fast, lightweight, i can develop on it (mostly 3D stuff) and occasionally play some games

Anyone has experience with the mentioned distros? What distro would you use for this?

Apparently Russia is getting in on the "English title and description, foreign language audio" clickbait.

You would think the YouTube team would realize they could use their auto-captioning AI to solve this problem and detect when it happens 🤔

I will never ever see, play, or think about video games the same way again. Even playing all my childhood games is never the same.

I will now forever see the game from the inside out, imagining what code the devs might have written to achieve what is happening: sprites, audio, triggers, AI algos, etc. No longer is a player or character just a player or character; they're sprites, animations, classes and variables and method calls. o.o

What the f*ck Microsoft, you made me go trough whole shitton of troubles just to play a music into microphone so I can play music in VRChat while pulseaudio in Linux can redirect the audio without any hassle. You total piece of shit!

Fuck Windows 10

Just fuck it

Another update, the audio won't play using the correct device again.

Says headphones, but plays through speakers, simple things like that every day. Now spend 30 min diagnosing why...

Just fuck it

I wonder, are some apps on purpose made to be small size, but then later when you open them force you to download the actual data made with converting people that are low on space or dont want heavy apps to actual download numbers? since if they now after discovering that, delete the app - they already have boosted the downloads

I can understand pulling offline databases or game updates from own servers to get the newest data, but sometimes you come across apps that have no need in any of those and could just e.g. package the audio which will never be updated

It's fucking sad that when you buy a new laptop with good specs, good nvidia graphics, good sound and install Arch Linux because you hate fucking windows and arch way is the right way. But, then Linux fucks you because there is no proper nvidia support and you have to use wine which doesn't support new games and you run frequently into problems like audio (P.s. maybe in linux 4.10.11). You have to configure microphone everytime while using Skype and see some other guy having same laptop playing happily latest games without much burden.😣😣😥😥😔😔

When will Linux kernel be amazing for gaming??

My most humbling experience was finding the source code online to the original Pokemon games. It was right after I had finished my first text based Linux console game and I was looking up other programs source codes just for shits and giggles. Most of them were simple and I learned a few simple tricks but the red and blue Pokemon were the first codes I saw that fascinated me. The addressing, the memory allocation, even the simple audio processing was simply genius. So many unique innovations and techniques. If I achieve 1/5th of the skill I found in those files, I can die a happy programmer!

Fuck my internet connection. I really dont get it, sometimes it works fine and I can download small files while using skype without any problem and the other day, without any apparent reason, I always get kicked out of online games, Websites take ages to load and teamspeak audio cuts out. What the fuck, I even closed everything that might take up the smallest amout of bandwidth. It fucking ruins my night to the point where I want to run through my computer setup with an axe.

So I just ditched Windows, but then realized that my music production stuff (mostly REAPER and a few free VSTs) are all Windows/Mac only.
Audio on Linux is fun (as in, pain). JACK seems to be really flexible but is a pain to set up correctly.

Any of you use Linux for music production? Any advice?

I'm using Elementary. Essentially, I need:
1. A good DAW for recording, minimal MIDI.
2. A good sampler.
3. Standard plugin suite - reverb, eq, filters, compressors, delays, etc. I'm not too choosy.
4. Basic synths (I'll be happy with a simple saw/square wave generator, but the more the merrier).

How's Ardour? Compiling it from source right now.

REAPER on Wine doesn't run well for me, so that's out. And they don't have a native Linux version yet.

(no Bitwig, please, I'm not ready to pay $300 or whatever right now)

A coworker came into my office today telling me that she cannot make any calls from any software using any kind of headspeaker sets (tried bt, usb, audio cable).
The audio device was not available. I open updates, run "install" - all updates fail except defender definitions. Audio is back.
Tnx MS, you make my day so fun as I get to explain why this happens.

Open office plans are a GREAT idea. Nothing says productivity like hearing a pin drop from across the building. Who needs good acoustics anyways? And you bet your ass the moment anything sensitive to background noise is going on you're no longer allowed to communicate at all, because even a potato plugged into an audio jack can hear you whisper from 50 feet away. Good thing we don't do that often - only on days that end in Y, I assume.

I study Computer Science. At school we have a little project group that help others students in different fields with their computer problems.

A guy came and he says that he tried to removed the jack from the audio jack - he broke it for whatever reason - with a stick with hot glue on it's tip saying he saw this on Youtube. The glue got stuck in the jack... We had to buy a new headphone jack card for his laptop.

working with some voice actors.

Anyone familiar with balancing audio between differrent studios so the sources sound like they.."match"?

Or does it come down to making sure actors have the appropriate recording environment?

i'm starting a project where i will have a large amount audio clips, anywhere from a few seconds to about an hour long, and i need to store them based on which user created them and what group they are created in (so they will be sorted based on two integers). i'll need to concatenate and/or merge the audio files frequently, and i may need to filter which audio i use based on users and time created.

how should i store the audio? i'm pretty sure a database is the best option, but should i consider using the file system? if i shant, should i use mysql or postgres? i know postgres has more types and supports complex queries.

does anyone have experience who can help?

SORRY, OF OFF-TOPIC

Have you ever woke up one day, and EVERYTHING in your day went wrong?

I am working in a online media website to earn money while I'm on the university.

Today I had to deliver a work for uni in the morning. I only had to print it. Well... The printer wasn't working, so I got late to work.
At least they were cool about it.

Then I started working.
I had to record and edit 2 videos (and other easier things in between).
The first one went very smoothly and fast.

Then I "recorded" the second one. This one was with the most beautiful woman on there. Deamn, she's beautiful...
I got very nervouse.
First take, at the end of it, I look to my right and the mike was on the table. So she was basically talking to no one.
We had to record a second time.
When we finished, I looked at the camera, and I saw that I hadn't connected the audio receptor to the camera. Fuck! I was so unfocused...
We had to record a 3rd time.
What a shame.......

Then my colleague was in my computer, and I end up getting out of work 2 hours extra.

Now, to finish, I just lost my last bus home, and I need to take a taxi...

Fuuuuuuuck!

Do you use personal assistants for home automation? If yes, what's your setup?

I'm thinking about setting up a RPi/similar with Jasper and bundling it up with Home Assistant, however, I'm not sure about the audio hardware yet.

Holy shit! I have not programmed a Teensy micro in a while. So I was looking at what they offer and saw they now have a 600Mhz version that is the same size/pinout as their 72MHz version. I am just amazed by how much micros have changed. I love the embedded wifi chips that are out there too. I guess I am going to be playing with the Teensy the next few weeks. I love playing around with embedded audio processing. Lately I have been playing with bluetooth wireless audio. So this will fit nicely. The chip has 2 AD and assorted digital audio inputs/outputs.

I dunno, I was excited and this seems like a nice new years present.

I embrace the removal of the audio jack on smartphones, and I like listening to music via my Bluetooth headset.

Yet why, for fuck's sake, is a double tap on the headset's play button mapped to Call Redial?

I have lost count how often I called someone by mistake. How is such on action a meaningful default? What were they thinking, were they thinking at all?

Everytime I turn on the goddamn headset, I take extra care to ensure that I don't doubletap yet it still often happens by mistake.

I rarely call people anyways on my smartphone anyways.

Someone on WhatsApp asked me did I like the new update or not ?
Well here is what I replied,
WHAT THE FUCK ?! NOOooo ! already there is Snapchat whose USP is this feature, Snapchat is Snapchat, then they introduced this feature on Instagram that's ok...but WhatsApp should be WhatsApp.
ALL I WANTED IS A SIMPLE PLAIN MESSAGING APP, THAT'S IT !

Now it's wasting my time more, earlier I just used to see Instagram & Snapchat stories in my free time BUT now !? I will see these fucking stories again here on WhatsApp too... BECAUSE I can't help it, it's in our human mind psychology too, we are curious beings, we are somehow bound to open that Status Tab when we will see a green dot ! If it's not true SEE THE NEWS ! NASA just found a whole new Solar System just ~40 light years away ! YES we are curious, we explore, we invent things.

I hope they will roll it back, but NO the ugly truth my friend is people will rant about and forget, and we will end up using it too, hate this seriously ! for instance the new iPhones have no 3.5mm audio jack, WTF ?! well say goodbye to my favourite ear buds ! and buy these FUCKING NEW Monstrously over priced bound-to-buy pair of earbuds if you need high quality audio out.

AND are we bound to be slaves and continue using these features because everyone else is doing so ? NO ! I will use whatever I like the most, I will go back to the roots, may be use those old school IMs and may be ask others to join it.

I'm new to speech recognition game, so I was wondering what's the advantage of Tensorflow's audio recognition over Microsoft.Speech in Visual studio, if any.
Also open to any other suggestions/lectures on the matter.

I was trying out flutter because why the fuck not. I made a plan for an application the downloads an Osu!-beatmap file and extracts the infos relevant for an external music player (like background, the song file, title and so on)

So I designed a basic database scheme and decided to include the files into the database. 3 hours into development it hit me...

HOW THE FUCK IS THE EXTERNAL MUSIC PLAYER SUPPOSED TO GET THE AUDIO FILES WHEN THEY ARE IN MY DATABASE!

Guess I'll just have to replace the files with absolute paths instead. 😒

When the AudioAPI was new in browsers i did something like a virtual kaoss pad in js. With some touchscreen like thing for applying filters (looking and working like the kaoss one) and a sampler with multiple tracks to use and even the possibility to add own sound files into the sampler, recording your work, saving it as wav, ...

Actually sick thing.

But it was quite basic after all. Only two filters, no time correction (the samples got played back as you put them in, so if you are a millisec out of sync - it sounded shit)

Nonetheless I'm very proud of that thing.x)

Sooo I was wondering what you guys listen to while coding?
I mostly listen to instrumentals, feel like anything that has words can sometimes be distracting.
Was thinking of listening to audio books though lol. don't know how it'll go XD.
What do you think?

Microsoft Edge.........Really?@DolbyAudio. I love Mozilla Firefox as it is not interested in this Edge browser.

Management is preparing overview/standup session, to get everybody in sync about what is currently ongoing across the team while we are isolated.
SMEs agreed each topic should not be too detailed and 10-15 min (average attention span lmit) otherwise people will lose focus.
Management outcome? "Let's include an 1 hour deepdive session on [incredible complex and monotone subject]".
Maybe the audio quality wouldn't be so bad if they wouldn't have their heads up their asses.

Video conferencing apps:

Competition is great. It just sucks when you have to use all the competition.

Things I want to be able to do:

- Test Mic and Audio before joining the call, BOTH DAMN IT (some do do this, some just one or the other).

- No fiddling in settings to do test / change settings. I want to know / test every damn time before I join ...

- and it would be great if it forced everyone to test too ;) (obviously some complications there if folks are joining and don't intend to talk)

Things I to see all the time on the app, don't hide this shit, and GOD DAMN IT DON'T AUTO HIDE IT:

- Is my mic muted or not.
- Is my mic broadcasting sound or not.

I've been lucky enough to not have any terrible dork ups using these apps but man they seem to invite it by hiding stuff.

Don't go to hacker spaces when you have made up your mind and want to find some help turning that mind into a thing, folks.

Yesterday a person came to our hackerspace and wanted to buy ten bucks worth of parts to fix an audio problem in a cheapo active speaker they built. Unfortunately they dropped a line like "I measured the problem I want to fix and thus need X value of ...".

Well. Turns out that this collection of weirdos also has usually within reach quite a sizable sum in measurement equipment. So not only did that person not get what they wanted (the parts), they also had their own measurement proven wrong and been drawn into the space by half. They'll come back soon.

:)

I wonder if you guys can help, nobody else seems to.

Nine months ago I packed my desktop away because I had to move.
I then turned it on a few weeks ago and noticed a curious problem: the audio and video stutters.
I don't know why this happens.

I tried booting into Linux, and didn't see any stuttering. I went back over to windows and updated all the drivers, but nothing worked.
Last night I did a full system wipe, and re-installed windows without leaving any of the old files.

The error still persists.

I have no clue what might be wrong with the computer.
For all I know it's the hardware that's failing, but I don't have any idea which component in the system is leading to this strange behaviour.

Maybe you guys know enough to shed some light on this?

My computer started crashing two days ago. Logs say its the audio driver. Now I wanted to start the diagnosis just for fun. Guess what? The conclusion of it was: You have a low volume level, we will increase it by 20%p... GOD DAMN. YOU HAD ONE JOB TO DETECT THE DRIVER IS OBVIOUSLY CORRUPTED (Reason: Unknown)

Have to change out the audio player on a WordPress site for a podcast. Can't follow the code properly because wp forgets that standards are a thing. Code readability is shit as well. Fucking WordPress.

1.) Read the docs on the website
2.) Curse the Devs for bad docs
3.) Go to YouTube and pray that I find a food tutorial WITH AUDIO!

(jk,sometimes some docs r very neat and clean)