Spoiler alert!!!!

People are awesome 😂 😂.

That late coffee was a mistake... (For the millionth time)

Now I have to sit in bed for 2 hours contemplating my life choices...
Spoiler: not good!

Dev: "What if the user has more than 100 entries? How would that display?"
UX: "They won't ever have that many"
Dev: "But what if they do?"
UX: "They won't."

(spoiler: they do)

!!rant
!!ANGER

Micromanager: "Hey, Root!

Since you're back, and still not feeling well, we have an easy ticket for you: Rewrite the slack integration gem! Oh, you don't have to re-implement all of it, just make sure it all works the same way it does now. That bitch you worked with once over a year ago who kept throwing you under the bus to management and stealing credit for your work? Yeah, she wrote the original code like four years ago. It's perfect, so don't touch it. but she can fill you in on all the details you need and get you up to speed on how to test it.

But yep! It should be simple. and I just knew you would love this ticket, so I saved it just for you. Nice and quick, too, to get you an easy win.

You know, since you have to repair your reputation with product. and management. and the execs. and the rest of the team. and me. Yeah, product doesn't trust you so they don't want to give you any tickets. They just can't trust you to get them out and have them work. So you have a lot of hard work to do."

Spoiler: The bus-thrower wasn't much help. (Surprise.)
Spoiler: The ticket was already in my backlog -- one of a grand total of two tickets.
Spoiler: I don't find the ticket fun. Maybe if I was to write the entire implementation with a nice DSL? but no, "don't touch the perfect code." Fuck you.
Spoiler: It isn't going to be nice or quick. But, she (micromanager) is looking to lose me, so that really is an easy win. for her.

And. just. argh. fuck you. i've been exhausted and dying for well over a year, but you've kept ignoring that (and still are, despite me providing goddamn legal forms from fucking doctors stating it in plain fucking english, which you also fucking ignore), and you just keep piling on the work and demanding the ridiculous of me despite it. Yeah I can pull it off sometimes. No, I really shouldn't, and I'm surprised I can. (also, "Time off? What, and lower your productivity even more? ____ doesn't even take vacations. And how are you doing on that ticket?") And no, none of my tickets have ever had any fucking problems. Not even when there are upstream service outages. Not. a. single. fucking. one. Ever. And the only things I've ever missed were things that bloody product never put in the fucking ticket, so fuck you with your "repair your reputation" bullshit.

god, i fuckiNG HATE THESESTUPOID ANWETLJAF SAJEWTKW BITCHFACEDUCKFUCKERS

Why the FUCK am I still fucking working here?
Right, because I've been burned out and dying so much I can't pass a fucking interview so I can fucking leave.

jasdkl;fk

ugh. Anyway. If you ever find yourself starting work at a Cali fintech company whose internal mascot is a very fine duck? Just run. I absolutely guarantee you will be miserable.

Guess who compiled a program with 0 errors and 0 warnings at first try!! 😀😀😀
Spoiler: not me

A new urgent request today…

“ITS URGENT WE NEED THIS CODE IN IMMEDIATELY I DONT CARE IF ITS FRIDAY WE NEED IT THERE BY ONE HOUR”

“What is happening?”

“ADD THIS CODE TO OUR CODE”

(A snippet to track marketing conversions from fb)

“Uhhh it’s Friday and our product won’t release to the public for 2 months anyway?”

“YOU DONT GET HOW URGENT IT IS, MUST BE THERE IN AN HOUR OR WE’LL LOSE DATA”

“O….k”

Spoiler: data said that today we had no customers on an unreleased project. Go figure!

Developer vs Tester

(Spoiler alert: developer wins)

My last developent was quite big and is now in our system testing department. So last week i got every 20 minutes a call from the tester, that something did not work as expected. For about 90% of the time i looked at the testing setup or the logs and told him, that the data is wrong or he used the tool wrong. After a couple of days i got mad because of his frequent interruptions. So I decided to make a list. Every time he came to me with an "error" i checked it and made a line for "User Error" or "Programming Error". He did not liked that much, because the User Error collum startet to grow fast:

User Errors: ||||| |||
Programming Errors: |||

Now he checks his testing data and the logs 3 times before he calls me and he hardly finds any "errors" anymore.

him: *explains feature*
Can you do that?
me: No.
him: Okay, you'll do that.

spoiler: I did it. This actually happened like 3 times with the same dude.

Long rant ahead.. so feel free to refill your cup of coffee and have a seat 🙂

It's completely useless. At least in the school I went to, the teachers were worse than useless. It's a bit of an old story that I've told quite a few times already, but I had a dispute with said teachers at some point after which I wasn't able nor willing to fully do the classes anymore.

So, just to set the stage.. le me, die-hard Linux user, and reasonably initiated in networking and security already, to the point that I really only needed half an ear to follow along with the classes, while most of the time I was just working on my own servers to pass the time instead. I noticed that the Moodle website that the school was using to do a big chunk of the course material with, wasn't TLS-secured. So whenever the class begins and everyone logs in to the Moodle website..? Yeah.. it wouldn't be hard for anyone in that class to steal everyone else's credentials, including the teacher's (as they were using the same network).

So I brought it up a few times in the first year, teacher was like "yeah yeah we'll do it at some point". Shortly before summer break I took the security teacher aside after class and mentioned it another time - please please take the opportunity to do it during summer break.

Coming back in September.. nothing happened. Maybe I needed to bring in more evidence that this is a serious issue, so I asked the security teacher: can I make a proper PoC using my machines in my home network to steal the credentials of my own Moodle account and mail a screencast to you as a private disclosure? She said "yeah sure, that's fine".
Pro tip: make the people involved sign a written contract for this!!! It'll cover your ass when they decide to be dicks.. which spoiler alert, these teachers decided they wanted to be.

So I made the PoC, mailed it to them, yada yada yada... Soon after, next class, and I noticed that my VPN server was blocked. Now I used my personal VPN server at the time mostly to access a file server at home to securely fetch documents I needed in class, without having to carry an external hard drive with me all the time. However it was also used for gateway redirection (i.e. the main purpose of commercial VPN's, le new IP for "le onenumity"). I mean for example, if some douche in that class would've decided to ARP poison the network and steal credentials, my VPN connection would've prevented that.. it was a decent workaround. But now it's for some reason causing Moodle to throw some type of 403.

Asked the teacher for routers and switches I had a class from at the time.. why is my VPN server blocked? He replied with the statement that "yeah we blocked it because you can bypass the firewall with that and watch porn in class".
Alright, fair enough. I can indeed bypass the firewall with that. But watch porn.. in class? I mean I'm a bit of an exhibitionist too, but in a fucking class!? And why right after that PoC, while I've been using that VPN connection for over a year?

Not too long after that, I prematurely left that class out of sheer frustration (I remember browsing devRant with the intent to write about it while the teacher was watching 😂), and left while looking that teacher dead in the eyes.. and never have I been that cold to someone while calling them a fucking idiot.

Shortly after I've also received an email from them in which they stated that they wanted compensation for "the disruption of good service". They actually thought that I had hacked into their servers. Security teachers, ostensibly technical people, if I may add. Never seen anyone more incompetent than those 3 motherfuckers that plotted against me to save their own asses for making such a shitty infrastructure. Regarding that mail, I not so friendly replied to them that they could settle it in court if they wanted to.. but that I already knew who would win that case. Haven't heard of them since.

So yeah. That's why I regard those expensive shitty pieces of paper as such. The only thing they prove is that someone somewhere with some unknown degree of competence confirms that you know something. I think there's far too many unknowns in there.

Nowadays I'm putting my bets on a certification from the Linux Professional Institute - a renowned and well-regarded certification body in sysadmin. Last February at FOSDEM I did half of the LPIC-1 certification exam, next year I'll do the other half. With the amount of reputation the LPI has behind it, I believe that's a far better route to go with than some random school somewhere.

Guess who just passed his bachelor thesis with 1,1 😜 Spoiler: I did! 🎉🍻

Our company just had a meeting with another company which are our main investors for a project for the next quarter. I sit down next to my team lead and we all wait for their last HR person to arrive. Ten minutes later a girl which I hooked up with last week walks in and sits next to the other company's "main boss". Spoiler alert, she is the bosses daughter.

We might pull out from the project but I sure didn't last week.

I hope this rant doesn't get deleted...

When somebody started bragging about his superior coding skill then I said that talk is cheap and that I wanted to see code (for some reason, this pissed her off) and then she started to DDoS me :^)

spoiler alert: she got a huge fine for it AND got fired from her job (whose servers she used to perform the DDoS)

The last person who might have taken offense at this recently quit, so time for a consequence-free rant. I just want to say...

Fuck absolutely every single one of my teammates who quit this year. Fuck your shitty, undocumented spaghetti code from hell that the rest of us will have to rewrite because it's utterly broken and functions mostly on prayer and luck. Fuck the 1000+ git repos we'll have to rename so we can even begin to tell them apart. Fuck your complete lack of any sort of processes or procedures or standards. Fuck the person who hated tickets and decided we could just have hundreds of people ask us for help on Slack whenever they need it. Fuck the people who quit because we got a new manager who told us we need to support the applications we build. Fuck the person who said "I'm leaving because I want to move forwards instead of backwards" as if fixing bugs in the code YOU WROTE TWO WEEKS AGO is really moving backwards. Fuck the two people who designed their own separate pipelines and then used both without bothering to debate and pick the better one (spoiler: both are completely undocumented and broken as hell).

I hope your various new employers figure out that your strategy of covering shit with gold paint doesn't change the smell.

Now the rest of us have to fix it all, and we're probably going to start by demolishing most of it so we can rebuild it from scratch.

I’m on video calls very often, but never really bothered if I’m wearing a shirt or tee. Even when the call is with people like CEOs or bosses.

This time though, the friend specifically asked to be in a good shirt, be professional and shit. Till this point all I knew was the friend started a very amazing business of sort and would like me to join too. And the person I’ll be meeting is very busy and impossible to get an appointment.

The buildup is so much for this call that I’m wondering it’s either going to be CIA or scam. Spoiler alert: it wasn’t CIA.

A few minutes into the call, I get a feeling it’s a scam. A few more minutes and I was sure it’s a pyramid scheme.

Now, I can’t call it out because the friend is really into it, almost blindly believes this scheme, and isn’t ready to hear any counter-arguments. So I thought, let’s just get over with this call.

The call went on for 3 hours. 3 WHOLE HOURS. I had to be attentive, professional, and not laugh on their face for 3 hours. On top of that, I was feeling hungry AF.

Mr. impossible-to-get-appointment was explaining Robert Kiyosaki’s financial theories - in a completely incorrect manner and interpretation. I tried correcting a couple of times, because I’ve read his books and theories in detail - but this person just went on and on and on for 3 fucking hours.

I don’t need a fucking vacation starter kit
(Spoiler alert: i probably do)

So I've been applying to jobs. I, purposely, have been putting down that I am female (since they all harp on diversity, I'd like to see if they even bother reaching out to me. Also anything to get my resume past the bots).

Spoiler alert - getting similar ratios to male counterparts, 100+ applications sent, maybe 4 phone interviews. No offers yet. Still made to do code challenges.

Well, I just found out where all that diversity hiring went to. Buddy of mine who works at a mid tier company said that they have a special program that onboards women into tech.

Specifically, women who have literally zero background in computers.

Teachers, social workers, etc. They get a week or so of some coding bootcamp and then get full time positions over more skilled applicants.

This infuriates me. I literally would be in a better situation to be hired had I not have had any technical background, taken this particular bootcamp and finally net the elusive entry level position I need.

And guess what? That move has antagonized the existing male employees who see that they have zero interest and zero competency instead of having an integrated workplace.

10/10 for incredible bullshit.

⛔️⛔️⛔️⛔️⛔️⛔️⛔️⛔️
⛔️ SPOILER ALERT ⛔️
⛔️⛔️⛔️⛔️⛔️⛔️⛔️⛔️
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You've been warned
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
⛔️🚨⛔️🚨⛔️🚨⛔️🚨⛔️
ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK
🚨⛔️🚨⛔️🚨⛔️🚨⛔️🚨
.
.
.
.
.
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That was an awesome way to end the series!

Not a spoiler

Today's project was answering the question: "Can I update tables in a Microsoft Word document programmatically?"

(spoiler: YES)

My coworker got the ball rolling by showing that the docx file is just a zip archive with a bunch of XML in it.

The thing I needed to update were a pair of tables. Not knowing anything about Word's XML schema, I investigated things like:
- what tag is the table declared with?
- is the table paginated within the table?
- where is the cell background color specified?

Fortunately this wasn't too cumbersome.

For the data, CSV was the obvious choice. And I quickly confirmed that I could use OpenCSV easily within gradle.

The Word XML segments were far too verbose to put into constants, so I made a series of templates with tokens to use for replacement.

In creating the templates, I had to analyze the word xml to see what changed between cells (thankfully, very little). This then informed the design of the CSV parsing loops to make sure the dynamic stuff got injected properly.

I got my proof of concept working in less than a day. Have some more polishing to do, but I'm pretty happy with the initial results!

Who wants to buy $77.44 worth of arduino parts (including an UNO, two Pro Micros and a Digispark)

For best offer + SH (Paypal)

Parts consist of two sepperate kits and a few individual parts purchased.
All parts are unused (besides the Digispark) but some have been opened.

Message me on Telegram @thecyaniteproject or Discord @Kianite#3935 for exact parts listing.

US based.

Backstory: (If this is even needed)
I spent a lot of money on parts for a project after everyone told me it was a bad idea. Spoiler: It was a bad idea.

Game of Thrones totally fucked up my coding mindset tonight. I guess it's time for bed.

Only if people understood the amount of effort that goes behind building a simple app.
Even if it's a simple notes app, I've to design the UI (at least 2 different activities - 1 for the list and the other for editing notes), write the code which makes it run i.e. without which the app is just a piece of empty design, think about what data
structures to use (that notes you are saving need to be stored somehow) and then club everything together and hope nothing breaks (spoiler alert: something will definitely break).

People need to understand that it's not just putting some fancy buttons and boxes around. Also, I'm not just making the app for one device. I've to make sure it works on different screen sizes, different versions of the OS (a user can't imagine how many functions need to be re written because something got deprecated in the process and I'd to switch to something different).

Also I'm not just sitting at my computer and converting coffee to code. I've to think about the flow, structure, design, navigation, backend etc. Of the app; most of my time isn't spent writing code but thinking/studying how to write the code. I also need to wait while the project is compiling/building every time I want to test it.
A function which you think is hard to implement night be really easy while something you claim is easy might be a nightmare. Oh and I didn't even mention how I need to stick to some design guidelines to make the app look consistent with the rest of the OS.
If you're wondering why a developer is spending most of his time on a browser, he isn't playing internet games or browsing reddit ( at least you better hope not), he's probably looking at the docs/stack overflow to get something to work/fix something!

Wow! That was long. Thanks!

Since this post was too long for devrant's 5k sign limit, I split it in several parts. I will try to make each part comprehensible as a standalone post. This is part one of WHY WOULD I WANT TO WORK WITH YOU? saga. A tale of empathy, competence and me being a dick, even though I didn't really want to be one. The part one is titled: "Bad times, good times". It may or may not have any value. It probably won't be funny.

I dedicate this to every single junior or entry level dev out there, struggling to find a job in their field.

=====

What do you think, how long does it take for junior with 6 months of commercial experience to find a dev job? If your answer was "idk", you're right. If your answer was "3 montths maybe", you're also right. At least this is how long it took for me. I am writing this at 2am, couple of hours after I managed to get employed. I am happy. My employer probably is happy too. My recruiters certainly are. The guy whose offer I had to reject after we were almost ready to sign the contract, on the other hand, isn't. He probably hates me. We'll get to that one post at a time.

Let's move back in time a little bit. It's December 12th, 2019. It is third month after I left my family home. I don't ha0ve a job, I was living first in my older brother's apartment for a month, then I started to rent my own. I have literally no money, I'm in debts. I moved out because reasons that would make up for another couple of posts, and for said reasons I refused to get 'any job just to pay the bills'. You can imagine that I was in pretty bad situation, and my psyche didn't really take that shit too well either. My daily meal was a bowl of rice with a little bit of self-hatred on top. Gourmet.

At that time, my daily routine would consist of practicing music, practicing programming, trying to get a job and surviving. Some of my friends just turned their backs against me. I did a small rework of my contact list as well. It was a *hard* time. I had sent my CV to around a hundred different companies with very little to no response. Some of them required at least bachelor's in IT for their frontend dev. Some of them required experience I didn't have. Some of them just didn't care to answer me. And then that one day happened. Three different people wanted to meet me and talk about internships/job offers. I will share what happened next in next posts, but here's a quick spoiler. I got a job. Yes, I am hyped.

Dear fellow Dev. This is a small reminder. If you're having bad times, just remember that if you focus on what you need to do, you will be just fine. Sometimes it may take days of struggling, sometimes it will take months of eating mostly rice. We all... Most of us have been through this.

Next posts will be less inspirationalstufftelling and more storytelling. Let this post be a setup, a small context to keep in mind upon reading my next stories. Because it is quite important. For me and for the story.

I want to talk about my last six months at work. Who wants to hear it?
Spoiler alert : from introverted nerd to Talkative flirt
What did it cost? Everything.

They give you 2 containers, one with one amibea the second with 2 amibeas.

Amibeas divide themselves into 2 identical amibeas after 3 minutes.

The container with 2 amibeas get filled up after 3 hours.

How long​ does it take the one with one amibea to get filled up.

The test was named:"Javascript Test"....

I first thought, should I write this in JS?

Spoiler: the answer is 3h and 3 minutes.
But why? What's the link with JS?

Applied for a job at Canonical.
Was waiting for an e-mail response to know if I would move up the interview process or not.
Got a standardized e-mail to evaluate their hiring methods and how fast it was.
In that standardized e-mail there was this question:
"Do you know why you didn't move up on in the application process?"
Fuck. The e-mail should have something saying "Spoiler alert".

Black mirror is awesome.
What do you all think about that?

Christmas Party (2016) SPOILER ALERT

you've been warned

mental discussion I had yesterday after watching Christmas Party:

Hacker me: "I wonder if is really this easy take down the internet connection of an entire city........... maybe I'll google it around and see"

Normal Person me: "Let me get this straight you're thinking to google 'how to take down city internet'? ARE YOU A FUCKING IDIOT???? DO YOU REALIZE IN WHICH KIND OF WORLD WE LIVE NOW? DO YOU REALLY WANT THE SECRET SERVICE OF 5 DIFFERENT COUNTRY TO KICK DOWN YOUR DOOR AT 5 IN THE MORNING???????"

Bluntly telling management that they're wrong, full of shit, and need to quit doing stupid things instead of just smiling and nodding and taking the paycheck. SPOILER ALERT: After 20 years in industry, they're NEVER going to change. They're just going to keep doing stupid shit. The best you can do is smile and politely point out that it's a problem. Then, look out for your own concerns and make sure you don't have to suffer with their bullshit decision as best as you can.

spoiler: not a rant
sometimes you just gotta take some time out from looking at the monitor and chill like it's the infinity.
Location: Hounslow Central, London, UK

Sorry, long since my last post...

I have quit my job recently at DERP & CO.. The level of anxiety was already somewhat of medical severity.

For months I had been in a project that not only did not progress, but that it was getting worst day by day.

A bit of Context

November: "Dev, junior anon needs you to help him on the SHIT project because they are running out of time, it is mainly doing unit tests."
Well, the code was a mess, there was a LOT of copy paste and it was all bad quality (we talk about methods with complexities between 80 and 120 according to SONAR QUBE).
Dev: "Anon, you know this is wrong, right?"
Anon: "Why? it works"
Dev: after long explanation.
Anon: "Oh well, yes, from now on I will take it into account." And he did it / try his best.

Dev does the unit tests and do extra work outside of the reach of the sprint (y than i mean work after hours, classic) and alerts the boss of the mess.

December: After a project of approximately 6 or 8 months of development, the boss discovers that the junior anon have been doing everything wrong and/or with poor quality (indicating that throughout the whole development the quality of the code was NEVER checked nor the functionality).

Boss: "This is a shit. Dev, you have to correct all the errors and warnings marked on sonar", which are around 1200 between smelling code, high risk errors, etc.

Dev fixes something like 900 bugs... lots of hours...
Boss: "This still is all wrong, we have to redo it. We will correct the errors leaving something stable and we will make a new repository with everything programmed as it should be, with quality and all"
- 900 corrections later, now are irrelevant -
Boss: "Dev, you will start to redo it, anon is out on other project. First you must leave the existing one working properly"
Dev: "ok ..."

January: How can I correct the mess if the client asks for more things. I am just fixing the mess, doing new functionalities, and when I have free time (outside the work) I try to advance the new repository, poorly I must say because burntout.

Boss: "Everything should be arranged at the end of January, so that you can redo everything well in February."
I can't handle everything, it starts to fall further behind. Junior Anon quits the job.

February: Big Bad Bugs in the code appear and practically monopolize the month (the code is very coupled with itself and touching in one place sometimes meant breaking other stuff).

Boss: "It can't be, you've been with this since January and you haven't even started correcting this mess in the new repo"

Dev: "It is that between the new things that are requested and the bugs I cannot put myself with that"
Boss: "Do not worry, you will be helped by random dev if you needed. SPOILER ALERT: random dev is allways bussy. Not made up bussy, He had a lot of work by itself, but it can't help me the way I need it.

High anxiety levels, using free time to try to reduce the work left and gradually losing the taste for develop.

March: So far, not only do they add new things day and day, but now they want to modify things that were already "ok", add new ones and refactor everything in a new repo. I just did not see an end of this nonsense.
Dev breaks, the doctor says it's anxiety, so I just know what I have to do.
Dev: "I quit my job"
Cool Manager: "Damn, why?"
Explain everithig
Cool Manager: "Do you want to try if I can change you to other project or anotjer scope on the same project?"
Dev: "Thanks, but no Thanks. I need to stop for a while".

End. sry for long sad post and maybe poor use of English (?) Not my native language.

Whelp. I started making a very simple website with a single-page design, which I intended to use for managing my own personal knowledge on a particular subject matter, with some basic categorization features and a simple rich text editor for entering data. Partly as an exercise in web development, and partly due to not being happy with existing options out there. All was going well...

...and then feature creep happened. Now I have implemented support for multiple users with different access levels; user profiles; encrypted login system (and encrypted cookies that contain no sensitive data lol) and session handling according to (perceived) best practices; secure password recovery; user-management interface for admins; public, private and group-based sections with multiple categories and posts in each category that can be sorted by sort order value or drag and drop; custom user-created groups where they can give other users access to their sections; notifications; context menus for everything; post & user flagging system, moderation queue and support system; post revisions with comparison between different revisions; support for mobile devices and touch/swipe gestures to open/close menus or navigate between posts; easily extendible css themes with two different dark themes and one ugly as heck light theme; lazy loading of images in posts that won't load until you actually open them; auto-saving of posts in case of browser crash or accidental navigation away from page; plus various other small stuff like syntax highlighting for code, internal post linking, favouriting of posts, free-text filter, no-javascript mode, invitation system, secure (yeah right) image uploading, post-locking...

On my TODO-list: Comment and/or upvote system, spoiler tag, GDPR compliance (if I ever launch it haha), data-limits, a simple user action log for admins/moderators, overall improved security measures, refactor various controllers, clean up the code...

It STILL uses a single-page design, and the amount of feature requests (and bugs) added to my Trello board increases exponentially with every passing week. No other living person has seen the website yet, and at the pace I'm going, humanity will have gone through at least one major extinction event before I consider it "done" enough to show anyone.

help

(Antman spoiler ahead)

When they hack a tunnel to the quantum realm in php ecks dee

Also when you can't enjoy the movie because you recognize php

I hate arbitrary deadlines.
Cocksuckers just pull them out of thin air and force me to give estimates about tasks that are impossible to give an estimate on.
(Spoiler: The tasks are the problem and need to be split and analyzed)

Spoiler:
The Boss is always right

If you also programm in your free time you probably know this kind of situations.

Situation: I'm currently creating my own PHP framework (I know there are plenty... I do it for "fun").

The database Connector Class wasn't working so after an eternity (around 2h) I just went to bed.
11pm: My Eyes open. I'm sure I just solved the problem in my dreams. (Spoiler alert: I didn't)

2am: I go to bed again. It didn't work.

Next day: I open the file add a missing required file. It works. I'm now tired AF and feel like dying and above all: I now get all the suicide PHP memes. Good night guys. I'm getting some sleep.

man i wish i had brain cells.

i was trying to free some storage by deleting some btrfs snapshots, so i mounted the directory and started rm -rfing, as you do. a couple minutes in, i decide to reboot and make sure i didn't accidentally start deleting my root partition.

spoiler alert: i accidentally started deleting my root partition.

it only got up to deleting /data (where i keep my multimedia), but my whole /boot directory is gone. now I'm gonna have to spend a couple hours redoing stuff like fstab and grub to make things work again 😃

Everytime you use OpenGL in a brand new project you have to go through the ceremonial blindfolded obstacle course that is getting the first damn triangle to show up. Is the shader code right? Did I forget to check an error on this buffer upload? Is my texture incomplete? Am I bad at matrix math? (Spoiler alert: usually yes) Did I not GL enable something? Is my context setup wrong? Did Nvidia release drivers that grep for my window title and refuse to display any geometry in it?

Oh. Needed to glViewport. OK.

Trying to re-type a massive essay I lost because the app refreshed for some reason. I'll try to keep it short (spoiler: I lied).

Recently, I had a conversation with a couple of non-tech people about AI and the fear of computers making humans obsolete. I have some strong (borderline ranty) opinions about this, and thought I'd post here to see what reaction is get.

This is not a "machines will destroy us" post, it's more about the very legitimate great of losing jobs.

- AI is a tool. It's main use would to be help optimise the more complex routine tasks and free up people's time to be more creative in their jobs. Basically, it's the next step of automation.
- Human intuition can never be replaced. Sometimes, things just seem a bit off. Sure, an AI would avoid ever getting in that situation, but only if it had learnt it in the past. A human will always have to be at the helm of any such system.
- Achieving true intelligence and sentience is like trying to travel at the speed of light. The closer you get, the more challenges you face.
- Getting hyped by sensationalist news that claims the end is nigh because two computers optimised the language they used to communicate when trying to reach a goal is stupid. All this shows is that the tech is working as expected and the systems can optimise on the fly. To me, this was a pretty awesome moment.

Now, I'm not saying dystopia is impossible, neither am I saying that it is inevitable. Just like any tool presented to us, if we use it responsibly, we can make life and society a lot better.

That this one component being object orientated is necessary and good design.
We have uh interfaces, theyre contracts.

Spoiler: it wasn't, I could have written it in half the code and half the time. But no, we gotta have those patterns, can't miss on dependency injection!

I've come to notice that mindful meditation does some good things to me.

And by "mindful meditation" I mean my subjective experience based on the shitty articles and videos I saw online, aka, I close my eyes and focus on how my breathing feels...

spoiler: it doesn't fix my depression and anxiety. The good thing that it does to me is that I seem to be more focused and to bump into simple solutions to problems I have everyday instead of freaking out about them.

So while it doesn't fix it, it does help a bit with anxiety.

The problem is that it's very, very, very goddamn hard to meditate to me.

I try to focus on my breath and not think for like 10 minutes. Even for 10 minutes, the experience is jarring.

I have this insane urge to just do something immediately. It's not a painful experience or anything or bad for my mental health so far, I just get massive urges to start doing something else, like, for example, I can't wait to start working.

So it's as if it decreased anxiety, but increases adrenaline or whatever? I dunno.

Disclaimer: I don't care much about the religious aspect at all, which is kind of problematic because 95% of what you find online is just biased religious marketing, and I avoid that like the plague.

An UI guy which actually complimented my will to work with non-dev professions in order to deliver quality features.
Spoiler: I am willing because you are awesome and are not offended in me asking questions outside my area of competence in order to be sure what I do is what you want, so if you happen to read this post kudos on you M. , not on me :)

Warning: silicon valley spoiler
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Am I the only one that doesn't comprehend why they didn't attempt to recover the shards of Anton's corpse? I mean there really isn't anything to lose and some parts may still be working. My brother and I could only conclude that it wouldn't be as dramatic as the straight up massacre by recklessness

Okay. So. I was fixing my laptop (the screen was broken) and I decided to just boot it normally rather than into linux with my USB just to test it.

Once it booted up I thought "you know what would be funny, if I decided to look at my crappy first ever programs", so I fired up eclipse and looked at them. Spoiler alert: it was really bad.

I then decided to go to my first proper project where I didnt follow a tutorial for it like I had with most bigger things up to this point. This was when I remembered that all the files had a last modified date.

I decided to go back to my first projects folder to see when I made it. Turns out it was 6 months before I thought I had started coding.

Awsome! I have 6 months extra experience.

Turns out this means in 2 years, 3 months I'll have 5 years experience, which is about half a year after I finish college.

First of all, it does not seem like almost 3 years already
Second, I cant believe how soon after finishing college I will reach 5 years. I thought it would be *atleast* a year.

Now then... where do I begin 😐

TLDR - fuck charity

A bit of backstory first, I was in my first year of college when I started this project for this charity.

It started in December of last year, my tutor approached me and asked if I’d like a project to work on, for my portfolio and what not, I agreed as I thought it would be a great opportunity. Saying yes to that question is my biggest regret so far. Oh boy the pain it has caused me.

The projected started a few days after I agreed. The stack and stuff was already agreed upon by my tutors higher ups. The stack was Wordpress and a theme called ‘X theme’ I understand the use for Wordpress, they are a non tech savvy client, it will be easy for them to manage.

The project was to basically modernise the current site the charity had, simple task you might think... ohhhh no. We agreed upon a deadline, January of 2017 (spoiler, we didn’t make that headline). However the charity wanted change, after change, after change, after change, after fucking change. Every time I’d show them the new revision it was never right, they’d always want another change.

Once we hit the deadline I asked my tutor if we could just drop it. His higher ups said we had to keep going (I could of abandoned my tutor and left him to do it but I’m not a prick). Anyway, we are now in November of 2017, a whole fucking year later and the site has only just been handed off. A WHOLE FUCKING YEAR OF THIS MOTHER FUCKING COCK SUCKING PRICK WHO WOULDN’T TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER.

Please may god be with me as we have to provide support for this site 😥😥

If anyone’s really curious as to which charity it is or the site. I’ll post it in the comments if you ask nicely enough

Finally made my node production server stable enough that I could focus on writing tests*. I start by setting up docker, mocking cognito, preparing the database and everything. Reading up on Node test suites and following a short tut to set up my first unit test. Didn't go smoothly, but it's local and there are no deadlines so who cares. 4 days later, first assert.equal(1+1, 2) passes and I'm happy.

I start writing all sorts of tests, installing everything required into "devDependancies," and getting the joy of having some tests pass on first try with all asserts set up, feels good!

I decide to make a small update to production, so I add a test, run and see it fail, implement the feature, re-run and, it passes!

I push the feature to develop, test it, and it works as intended. Merge that to master and subsequently to one of my ec2 production servers**, and lo and behold, production server is on a bootloop claiming it "Cannot find module `graphql`". But how? I didn't change any production dependencies, and my package lock json is committed so wth?

I google the issue, but can't find anything relevant. The only thing that I could guess was that some dependencies (including graphql) were referenced*** in both, prod and dev, and were omitted when installed on a prod NODE_ENV, but googling that specific issue yielded no results, and I would have thought npm would be clever enough to see that and would always install those dependencies (spoiler: it didn't for me).

With reduced production capacity (having one server down) I decided to npm uninstall all dev dependencies anyway and see what happens. Aaaaand it works.....

So now I have a working production server, but broken local tests, and I'm not sure why npm is behaving like this...

* Yes I see the irony.
** No staging because $$$, also this is a personal project.
*** I am not directly referencing the same thing twice, it's probably a subdependency somewhere.

I have just been invited to a Technical Test Server for the game I currently play most, but I have some development in progress! God my life is full of hard choices!

Spoiler: I'm playing on the TTS right now :x

So, it's been a while since I've been working on my current project and I've never had the "luck" to touch the legacy project wrote in PHP, until this week when I got my first issue.

And damn, this goddamn issue. It was a bug, a very strange bug, that only happens in production and that nobody has any idea what was happening, so yeah, I didn't have anyone to ask and I got less time than usual ( because Thanksgiving ).

And thus, I have no starting point, no previous knowledge on PHP and less time! I expected a very fun week 😀 and it was beyond my expectations.

First I tried to understand what might be causing the issue, but there wasn't any real clue to star with, so no choice, time to read the flow on the code and see what are they're doing and using ( 1k line files, yay, legacy ). Luckily I got some clues, we're using a cookie and a php session variable for the session, ok, let's star with the session variable. Where it's that been initialize ? Well, spoiler alert, I shouldn't start with that, because my search end up in the login method of the API that set a that variable and for some reason in the front end app it was always false and that lead me to think that some of the new backend functions were failing, but after checking the logs I got no luck.

Ok, maybe the cookie it's the issue, I should try open the previous website on the brow...redirect to new project login, What? Why ? I ask around and it's a new feature push on Monday, ok I got Chrome Dev tools I can see which value of the cookie it's been set and THERE IT WAS it has a wrong domain! After 2 days ( I resume a lot of my pain ) I got what I've been looking for, so now I should be able to fix the bug. Then where is the cookie initialized ? In the first file the server hits whenever you tried to enter any page of the app, ok, I found the method, but it's using a function that process the domain and sets it correctly? wtf ? Then how in heaven do I get the incorrect domain ? Hello? Ok, relax, you still have one more day to fix this, let's take it easy.

Then, at the end of the Wednesday, nope I still have no clue how this is happening. I talked with the Devops guy and he explain me how this redirection happens and with what it depends on, I followed the PHP code through and nothing, everything should works fine, sigh. Ok I still have 2 days, because I'm not from US and I'm not in US, so I still have time, but the Sprint is messed up already, so whatever I'm gonna had done this bug anyhow.

Thursday ! I got sick, yay, what else could happen this week. Somehow I managed to work a little and star thinking in what external issue could affect the processing, maybe the redirection was bringing a wrong direction, let's talk with the Devops guy again, and he answer me that the redirection it was being made by PHP code, IN A FILE THAT DOESN'T EXIST IN THE REPOSITORY, amazing, it's just amazing. Then he explained me why this file might be missing and how it's the deployment of this app ( btw the Devops guy it's really cool and I will invite him a beer ) . After that I checked the file and I see a random session_star in the first line of the code, without any configuration, eureka ! There was the cause and I only need to ask someone If that line it's necessary anymore, but oh they're on holiday, damn, well I'll wait till Monday to ask them. But once and for all that bug was done for ! 🎉

What do I learn ? PHP and that I don't want any more tickets of PHP 😆.

I swear, I started yesterday windows once for some guilty gaming. ONCE
Tried to connect Bluetooth headset
-> BSOD on the first try. Fuckn os can't handle shit
Works second time.
*Execute guilty_gaming.exe*
*Finish gaming business*
Want to shut down windows
"oh, I can only shutdown if I install your fucking update? Well fuck me pls no delet pingu partition

Next day. Pingu is alive. Wanna connect headphones.
* Connection: yes
* error.Failed
* Connection: yes
Fuckn ok, does it still work in windows?
Spoiler: fucking no! Very cool. I didn't there would be a better waste of time than gaming, but windows always fund a way to fuck you shit up.

Windows vista was less of a pain, windows 7 a nice memory and this is just an abortion fucking kept alive for the proving god that human can create a better hell for people than lucifer could ever imagine.

Way to go windows, I appreciate MacOS now

Working with Yelp API.
Had a working method to return Restaurant List in a separate project.
Moved that code to a new project.
Spent 3 hours trying to figure out why the tried and true method was returning an empty list.
I forgot I had also made a helper method in that other project to turn km into meters.
Instead of searching a 5km radius, I was searching a 5 meter radius...

(Prior to that I mixed up my longitude and latitude, and searched for pizza places in the antarctic. Spoiler: There are none.)

I have a weird love/hate relationship with JavaScript.

I'm not at all a webDev, but I like to use it occasionally because it's fun and I really like its syntax... but it's an absolute pile of shit.

If you put racing stripes and a spoiler on a golf cart, it's still a fucking golf cart.

Man...

Why is it by any means helpful to know whether the ENIAC had 1 000 000 vacuum tubes, or not? (Spoiler: it had far less)

We have this fucking inevitable optional c(o)urse for the last year and last semester at my Uni, called History of Computer Science. It would be totally fine, if we had learnt something really useful, or at least something really close to general knowledge, but no... Instead we should fucking know, who wasn't part of the team designing the ENIAC from a list of 6 people.

I guess our teacher should really go and rest as she is way over the minimum retirement age... and this is way below my expectations about our teachers being on the academic level...

- ok so I said I had to touch little bit of nodejs. It's a messenger like chatroom. Users data and the rest are stored in mysql. Chat messages are stored in mongodb. Found a funny issue. (Funny as in annoying that you just bang your head with your head while laughing funny) one mysql query in the node app is giving different order by result when you run it. I thought it was async issue. Turn out it's not. Said query works fine when running on phpmyadmin and the likes.

- I watched end game yesterday. And I'm sad. It's an end of an era. But also hopeful for various possibilities Marvel can do for future films.

- have you ever had such a great sex that afterwards she got serious headache and had to vomit?

Avengers End Game spoiler ✌️

Last week summary:

-questioning my identity (I’m cleaning and realised I forgot I used to like many activities I forgot and decided to give them more time)
-questioning how tf my unconscious seems to always plan ahead of me (ah yes I can do this cause I prep… why tf did I prepare for this?)
-questioning my skills (just a standard imposter syndrome, nothing to see here, move on)
-questioning my worth (as above)
-questioning how tf somebody connected to a secret account I have (spoiler: they don’t know and it’s a crazy coincidence… but now I know secrets about them 😏)
-randomly freezing during everyday life for all the above points

Job wise all is cool, tho 🎊

Why my brain dogshit.
I try to focus on something and then my brain flashes thousand things through my brain which i need to do. Then me getting angry and frustrated and no fucking concentration. Then i smoke a cig in hope that it helps(spoiler it does not). Then like 2 minutes it kind of works and then the exact same.

My fucking brain is fucked up.
I hate it here. My psychiatrist hopefully says something good this wednesday or i don't know any further..

Why can my only hope be some good drugs. Why not function without psychopharmaceuticals.

🚬🧠
⬇️⬇️
🗑️🗑️

[SPOILER]
I just watched Black Mirror: Bandersnatch the movie with chromecast, I didn't know what was going on until the movie told me, then I switched to the laptop

Best: Getting fired from a shitty company that regularly lied to middle-management after standing up for my team.

Worst: Losing a team of fantastic direct-reports that went to bat for each other, helped each other out, and help me be a better engineer.

(Spoiler alert: same job)

Being pretty much the only one who has some knowledge of how to code and get my way around tech (even if minimal, I'm too lazy for my own good) in my familiar household - and by extension, my family (Family extends FamiliarHousehold - LoL I'm sorry) - (my brother is on his first grade of a programming course in high school, I'm a 2nd grade uni student aiming to become a game dev) sometimes I wish I knew nothing of it.

Don't get me wrong, I do like working on code (if in Java. C is making me wanna tear my eyes out) but sometimes ignorant family members push me through the edge.

I worked on a business thing my family started this summer and one of the "jobs" was managing everything via a website.
Fair enough, I knew nothing of it when I started but I learn fast and just like that I knew my way around it. The problem came when I had to teach the person who started the project how it worked. This doesn't sound all that bad except he is kinda in the stone age regarding informatics.
He got a computer a few years ago and he pretty much only played poker in it, and he still had one of those old nokias you could throw to a wall and get a hole into it. The computer is like 9y and runs like crap.
To make things worse he bought a new phone, a smartphone, and pestered me to teach him. I swear trying to teach him is like repeating the same thing 1000x and pray he keeps it in his head. Spoiler: he doesn't. ( sanity--; )
So to try and easy my suffering I decided to make a manual for the website (which is outdated by now because the team behind the website did a 180 and some things looks different), but it acted as if I'd done nothing. ( sanity--; )
To top this off he keeps on saying I don't wanna help him. ( sanity--; )
This kept going for the whole damn summer, and meanwhile I had to go back to uni and in the first days I still got like 4-5 calls/day, half of those might about the smallest things because he's so panicky.
Like (both examples happened while I was still there but it kinda goes along those lines sometimes):
- (During the period they changed the website the first time since we're there; they were mostly doing changes back and forth and testing because it had a new layout for a day or 2 before going back; also the site was totally functional, except for a thing or 2)
Him: "They're changing the website, why are they doing that?"
Me: "Because it's their website and they can?"
Him: "WHY DIDN'T THEY LET US KNOW"
Me: "They don't have to, they don't work for you." ( sanity--; )
Or (during the same period; the pages have a menu on the left; one of the submenus has a counter that resets every time the session ends; during that maintenance time they must've "disabled" the function because the number kept growing even after the session ended):
Him: "WHY IS THE NUMBER GROWING?"
Me: "They're working on the code, relax, it's nothing."
Him: "But why." ( sanity--; )

The only quesion he pretty much hasn't asked me yet is why "Is the website's colour this one and not that one?".

When your co-worker ignores all warnings and knowingly breaks production, then tries to lie and say he had no idea what he was doing. He's been here a year and has been told multiple times how to handle production. He also acts like he knows everything (spoiler, he doesn't) and never shuts up.

India vs Pakistan, ICC Champions trophy finals..Sunday..a perfect combo to skip coding for a day..but the way match is turning out is making this day a spoiler :(

Umm ok devRant!!!
Frist when I saw that on someone's profile, I was like, man they are god damn great!!
But then I saw them on some more profiles and thought I might be a bug, only to realise that its 1st of April!!

PS: look at the number of ++s;

Ok, which datacenter do I have to set fire to, in order to stop these FUCKING PROMOTIONAL SMS MESSAGES THAT I KEEP GETTING FROM MY FUCKING PHONE OPERATOR??
NOW I'M GETTING PUSH MESSAGES TOO?!? BURN IN HELL YOU FUCKING FUCKS!
I WILL BUILD A FUCKING ARSENAL OF FUCKING ROCKETS AND I'LL SHOVE THEM UP YOUR SHITTY ASS AND BLOW YOU UP IN SO MANY PIECES THAT EVEN AVOGADRO WON'T BE ABLE TO COUNT HOW MANY WILL BE LEFT OF YOU.
AND SPOILER ALERT: I ALREADY KNOW HOW TO BUILD ROCKETS, SO YOU BETTER START RUNNING

First semester tutorials are fun (spoiler they can be frustrating).

Today my University held an entry level tutorial for LaTeX, which I had already visited a year ago and offered to help and boy ohh boy was that painful. For your information all of these students want to study computer science.

From around 50 people there was only one person who used Linux and I thought "Well at least one".

I was even more impressed as the other tutors asked me to help her because she used Manjaro (also the distribution I use).

As i helped her installing texstudio (the software presented) I needed her to enter the root (?) password and she answered "Which password, it's the laptop of my sister, I thought the laptop had windows installed".

Everything worked out fine but this was only the beginning.

After an hour came the first exercise in which the students had to build a simple document and for everyone who doesn't know LaTeX, it's a markdown language which heavily relies on \ and {}.

And there laid the other most common problem, some Mac users didn't even know how to write a \ or {}.

At least I had some fun helping them but if you want to study computer science you should be able to know how to write some of the most common symbols in programming languages.

Right now, most of my friends in whatsapp are doing one of those stupid viral message challenge that is designed to "testify friendships".

This latest one that i got goes something like this: they ask to send one of your pic to them and they will add it to their status. Then you have to also add their pic they send you as your status. Also you have to forward the challenge to your friends.

I don't know who comes up with such crazy stupid messages that is designed to force people change their perception of friendship. It's amazing how simple and gullible people are to such messages.

Spoiler Alert: yep, i also send it to few of my friends just for the heck of it.

Spoiler: This might be a dumb question

In this platform the rant count is showing for all people like a badge. And we can see that whenever someone comment in a feed or near the posted person. Do they have a separate column to keep track of rants ( ++ ) or is it a overload to call db count query of all ++ they recieved by various post and people because some people have 5000+ whenever their name appears

Welcome to my new series "shit I have to deal with as a developer hat was forced to become an TYPO3 integrator". I don't know how often I will post or how many parts there will be. To be true, I just need this series to vent about this shit.

10 months ago I started my training as a developer. Before that point I worked as an PHP developer in a student job. I was already experienced as a dev so I was looking forward to deal with great and interesting topics in the agency where my training would take place.
After a few weeks I was introduced to TYPO3 due to a support project that needed some tickets to be done. Also a new client bought many websites for most of his brands. So for the next 10 months or so until this day I mostly (around 95% of the time) worked on TYPO3 Projects and most of the time for this one client. I quickly became the "TYPO3 dude" and got tasks to integrate Fluid Templates, fix errors in templates, edit templates, sometimes even work on some smaller businesses logic.

We currently have 3 sites live, one waiting for a final customer approval and one WIP. The whole client project is setup on a single(!) TYPO3 instance with reusability of templates and other things in mind. Spoiler warning: it absolutely didn't work!

So be prepared for the next rant in this series where I vent about this piece of shit.

udemy.com/java-tutorial
I had some very minimal experience with Arduino and Zelio, so I guess I had the basic notions in the back of my mind, but this is where it all begun.
I was asked if I wanted to learn how to code because they needed a developer, so I chose Java because I liked Minecraft and I thought that if I failed, at least I could code some mods.
Spoiler alert: I didn't fail so I didn't have time to code mods... is it really not have failed?

Is Khalinsee dead yet? (Spoiler alert)