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Search - "dread"
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Do you ever feel coding fatigue?
My dev mana has run dry, I've hit my rate limit.
That moment where your brain thinks "I should finish building this React project, it's good for my portfolio" or "I should really work on fixing this query performance issue, I already know what the problem is" — but your stomach churns at the thought of having to interpret even a single line of code?
The last few days it really does feel like a physical illness, a nauseated feeling whenever I open an IDE. I have written about 12 lines of code since Monday.
It goes beyond writer's block, it's not a lack of focus or inspiration, it's a big knot in my head of everything that's wrong and inconsistent in development, and it causes feelings of dread, desperation and revulsion when trying to wrap my head around the simplest stuff.
Does anyone have good tips to overcome this feeling, something faster and less savings-account-destroying than "take a sabbatical year and travel the world riding an emu"? (seems tempting though)57 -
So before I resign from my job tomorrow I thought I'd talk a little about a couple of things at work that I won't ever tell my boss in person but are generally some of the reasons I want to leave.
---------- warning long rant ----------
1. The CEO of the company finds out I only have my learner's and take the bus, goes on to belittle me about taking the bus.
(It may have been meant as a joke but I was offended, and we don't have any actual HR to complain to)
First off my real reason for not getting my restricted is mostly related to the fact public transportation does the job it needs to, I don't really complain unless the planning is fucked up (Adele concert rant lol) but typically I don't need a car. The other reason is because with a car I'd have to wait in traffic 1-2 hour each way. Also cars cost money which I don't have.
2. CEO buys himself and general manager brand new Range Rovers, you know those giant monstrosities box jeep looking things.
I hate this because I earn $31k, those things probably cost around $50 each (so typically 3 years worth of my wages).
When I had a talk about my contract at the 6 month mark, the general manager (my boss) said he wouldn't budge on my salary (yet they buy these jeeps)
3. I live way too far from work and because of it being Auckland and the current inflation for house prices, the rent prices have also increase, I wouldn't be able to get a house closer to home nor rent with minimum wage :(
4. Though it's not too necessary they mask that the app was made by me, whenever I see an email about the app to potential clients they refer to be as this app guy, and during their presentations they don't really include as part of the reason this app has been developed ( aside from my boss being the client, I came up with some interesting ideas to turn their paper form of the process they use into a digital one, I also did research for the specific topics, something I could have just asked for instead).
5. Old fashioned way of looking at so called "IT", they added fixing computers to my contract which I dread, especially since I'll be close to a deadline and then I get a call to fix someone's computer...
6. They don't seem to want to expand their "development team" to more than one person.
When I give my resignation I have to stay here for a month and I bet people will start to act differently around me, my likely my boss and the CEO. I think the other people that work will understand, given my situation.
I'm planning to for the last month to only do planning for the app they want me to work on, UML diagrams, use cases, Sprint planning (albiet, only developer here lol). Research on the third party libraries we need for the app and generally give the next guy the easiest path to getting the app done.
I want to do this because the Android and iOS app we're done via cowboy programming in a sense. (I don't have too much in terms of documentation and planning aside from a Microsoft planning website setup with to-do of which features are done for the iOS and paper Todo for the Android app.
Alright long rant over, I've got it all written down, glad I'll be leaving this place.51 -
It’s that time again. I should be sleeping and instead I’m on here delirious with toothache and the dread of the dentist later.
So have a face reveal thread.
39 -
as a windows10 user, I'd like to coin the term
Restartophbia
[fuhk win-dohz]
a general sense of fear and despair, caused by either seeing the words "please wait", "we're getting things ready", or "update and restart"
Restartophobia treatments include having two or more pc's, or the application of Linux on a regular basis.
> Do I have Restartophobia?
General fear from the Restart is common, and does not necessarily mean you suffer from Restartophobia. But, if you dread opening your pc, or sweat and feel unbalanced every time you open the shutdown/restart options, you might want to check your symptoms6 -
I was told there's gonna be:
- good salaries
- informal company setups with benefits
- lots of jobs available
- non-dev people look at you in amazement
- get to work on really interesting stuff
What I'm actually doing:
- carrying a team of people in uni because you're the only one who knows how to code
- deal with shitty uncommented legacy code at work
- be reminded that if you don't do something super-sophisticated you're easily replaceable
- spend unpaid overtime hours because you're the only one at your job that is on the issue (I see a pattern of being alone in a problem here)
- requestion all my career decisions
- cry and be stressed
- hate every minute of work, yet be stuck in it because it's a source of income that is flexible enough for me to be able to study full-time
So dunno man, I'm still waiting on what I've been told, people say there's lotsa money and satisfaction waiting for me after grinding through 5 years of high education, it'd better be worth it5 -
Although I can easily support myself through my current manual labor work, I am starting to dread going to work because I just really miss programming and server management 😞
The job isn't even that bad but idk, I just really miss devving throughout the day 😩8 -
My home feels like $work owns a corner of it, and I can’t walk near there without feeling this this intense psychological dread.
Lack of time boundaries is pretty awful, too.6 -
rant, but not an IT kind... okay, maybe not even a rant, more like depressive rambling:
in 3 days, I'll turn 29.
i'm living with my mom, in the apartment where I was born, in the room i've been living since I was born (with the exception of 2 attempts to move out which together lasted 9 months).
my theoretical monthly income should/could be around 4000€, based on my skills and experience.
but I'm a (manic)-depressive, chronically lonely idiot loser (and the manic phases come more and more rarely in recent years), so
my practical average monthly income fluctuates from 0 to about 200.
i am unable to keep a job for more than 4 months, so after being fired from about 20 or so of them since I was 18, it takes immense amounts of mental and emotional energy to even start looking for one now... so I usually don't.
i've been about 12000€ in debt for the past 8 or so years, half of which is just debt collector fees.
it's kinda funny, for years, i've been unable to solve a debt which theoretically amounts to 3 months of my theoretical achievable salary.
my father, who just left without a word of explanation when I was 18, has decided this is not viable anymore, so I'm supposed to move out by 10th of next month, "either to some cheap rooming house, or under the bridge, I don't care", as he put it.
I can't remember how it feels to exist a single hour without feeling existential dread and dreading each next day, not knowing what to do or if i'll even be able to try and do something, because this feeling is so strong that it often blocks me from being able to do anything. i just shiver most of the time that i'm awake, feeling like you feel few minutes before puking and crying at the same time. and that feeling is my "how are you?", "you know... normal".
i can't remember what it feels to feel any other way and can't even imagine it, and can't imagine that I'll ever achieve any less shit feeling.
literally all of my social contact consists of going out once to twice a month with the only 2 friends and 2 aquaintances I have who have the time and will to spend it with me.
oh, and hiding in my room, avoiding talking to my mom, because each time we talk she just reminds me what a piece of shit failure I am, and tells me how it's not that hard to change it, I just have to stop being lazy and start working for it.
she's... kind and caring about it, which somehow maybe makes it even worse.
i have about 10 almost complete game designs, each of them at least 50% more original and interesting (at least to me) than the things that are coming out for the past 10 years, being lauded as "the most original and unique".
I have been trying to make them, ANY of them, since I was 18, but I always lose all the drive and resolve and energy in like 4 months, because it's like trying to build a city on my own on a deserted island. too big for one person, but there was never anyone to help me. closest I ever got was one of my friends telling me "i've been thinking many times that i'd love to work on some project with you, if I had the time".
and second time, when I actually found an artist I was going to pay, and he was awesome, and after two weeks of me telling him how awesome what he does is and how it fits the project and my ideas perfectly, he backed out saying "i'm afraid I can't do the quality you require from me".
never ever in my life did I get actual help with something I actually wanted or tried to do.
i have no idea how it feels to have someone working with me on something I actually consider interesting and meaningful, on any of the things which I wanted to make, which made me learn programming.
I've learned graphics and animation and everything going into game making pipeline on my own because I realized nobody will ever help me, so I'll have to do all of it on my own.
I've tried to make a kickstarter once, but I started crying hysterically in the middle of writing it, because I felt like a begging piece of failure shit, even more than usual, so I deleted it.
most of people treat me like shit failure unworthy and undeserving of living, precisely as I myself know I deserve to be treated, because that's what I am, but when I ask for permission to kill myself, since I see no other solution to stop being a burden, they get angry at me that I'm just emotionally blackmailing them. when I afterwards ask them "so help me in any way to do any of the projects i want/need to do", they respond they've got no time for that.
when I talk about all of this, I get told to stop whining.
happy 29th birthday, me, a piece of shit who should've never survived this long, who should've never been born in the first place.
yay.
also, I know this is not the kind of crap that's supposed to be posted here, but i've got nowhere else. sorry.47 -
My company got another contract to support a research institute. My current contract has shitty leadership that won't back us against our boss (different company, same contract) without proof. The fact that 3 of the 4 of us dread going to work isn't enough?
Anyways. Talking to the other site about transferring. Need to gtfo to a less toxic environment where I won't be made to work fucked up hours with a boss who doesn't like women in tech, and thinks he's something special because he's vegan (but had real leather jackets and bike seats, but that's an entirely different story) and does yoga and plays the guitar.
Meanwhile, he resents his kids and seems to regret getting married. All because he used his military education benefits to pay for their school.11 -
TL; DR: please save me from IT hell
Note 1: this is a rant that comes after a couple other rants I'm going to call "family business saga" from now on because I feel like this is gonna go on for a while
Note 2: the following may look exaggerated but it's because of how pissed off I am at said person
So I have to help this one family member with his computer but he's worned me out so much last summer that I can't stand him (it's all tech based). At all. Both in person and via text calls. I dread and become pissy each time he's nearby, just his presence makes me want to jump in a hole and stay there for eternity.
And he's not the smartest cookie in the jar when it comes to tech, so he comes to me for help (instead of going to my brother. Aaagh why doesn't he go for my brother as well, it's mentally tiring having to "help" him - as he doesn't learn what I'm trying to teach him even after several attempts). I don't really mind being sought for help when it comes to tech, but this guy takes it one step further.
He entered my room with his computer in his hands saying this friend of his has installed W7 on his PC (why didn't he handle all the things he wants to do, it would save me a lot of anger containment) and that I *had* (it's always "YOU HAVE" because I'm a tech-ish person and I'm in uni for CS) to help him do a bunch of things.
So he boots up the thing and there are 32 updates to do, so I'm guessing that he didn't boot it up after the OS update until now. He leaves my room and I sigh out of relief. He comes back with the AC remote complaining it's too hot in my room and that he's gonna put it down a degree or 2. Jesus christ do not tamper with my AC settings, it's fine to me. The updates are still going on. He leaves again.
The computer takes its time to update and so does he. I'm happily playing minecraft when he comes back, the computer off after updating. He looks at it and says "why is it off?". I reply back "it finished updating.", trying to keep my cool. Even the most simple questions are irritation inducing.
He reboots it and lets it run. After it boots and it's ready to go he just stays there for like 2' without doing anything because the hard drive light was going off. I think he thinks the computer is going to explode if he touches it while the light is blinking 😬
He goes to connect the computer to the internet and gets all surprised that the computer doesn't recognize our home's internet (he has been here before with his computer, I guess, so he had connected, so I think he was expecting it to auto connect like that). I tell him that the computer doesn't recognize our home's connection because it has had a fresh OS installation and so it didn't have any connection registered. He types in the password and the connection is established.
He them starts going on about that he wants to get these pics on the business' website and how does he put them in his computer and all that. I do that for him and he's all like "how did you do that?? 😮" like it's a magic trick
And he's always going on at everything as if it's all a big undoable thing. "How do I do this? You know what, do it yourself and show me because I don't wanna fail". Dude. Bro. Everything - EVERYTHING - you are afraid of doing is undoable. EVERYTHING. Good christ.
I swear I've never felt so glad I'm going back for uni next week9 -
My vacation is almost over. I didn't get any of my projects done but I'm fucking relaxed now.
Also, I haven't read my mails yet but I dread Monday. D:1 -
Y'all ever notice how the size and complexity of a project is a source of pride for those whom created the project, and a source of dread for those who need to maintain it?7
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I just realised that I've been experiencing a lot of stress and frustration over the last couple of months. I also realised that these feelings of dread and existential anxiety stem from my heavy use of Ubuntu. So I ended another agonizing 3 hours of trying-to-get-internet-access-again-so-I-can-get-some-fucking-work-done and managed to blow off some steam without causing too much property damage. Then I sat down and thought about it. And you know what? I hate Ubuntu.
With Window$ I can at least get some work done without having to write my own network drivers because the current ones do not function when the day of month is a prime number or some shit.15 -
Seeing this in my outlook fills me with dread - little can be worse than "corporate enforced fun sessions" 😩😭
6 -
I love to code, it scratches my creative itch
And i love to work, it drowns my productivity anxiety
But I dread every morning when i wake up to work on my current employer's project
It's that kind of combo of code base spaghetti and all over the place project management that sinks my galleys
Woe is me...5 -
All is well until one of the interviewers starts dropping questions like:
- Where do you see yourself in x years
- What gets you out of bed every day
etc.
that give you some nice mid interview existential dread.4 -
I miss when my job was just about coding, I could spend entire workdays writing C# or TypeScript while listening rock or metal with few meetings in between, being very passionate in programming and computers sometimes I found was I doing so engaging which I spent more than my 8 hours workday on company's code base trying to improve it and my older coworkers were very happy with my code.
Then a "promotion" happened, I went to work directly with a client, a huge enterprise which is working on renovating his internal software and here the fun stopped. Long useless meetings are a regular occurrence, there are absurdly long procedures to do everything (for example since CI/CD is leaky we have to do dozens of workaround to get a microservice deployed) and having very little written documentation this gives an huge advantage to people which actually enjoy to spend their entire workdays on a MS Teams call over "lone programmers" like me which actually feel significant fatigue in doing that (alone sometimes I was able to log 12+ hours of programming daily between work and personal projects while after 3 hours of PP I feel drained) since the information passes in meetings/pair programming and I dread both.
I feel which my passion is still there, I still enjoy coding, tinkering with Linux and BSD, broadening my knowledge with technical books and having passionate conversation about tech but I dread my job, sometimes I try to look at it under a more optimistic eyes but most of the times I just end disappointed.3 -
Mate; I've been reading for over a week to understand some concept.
All I have after all this time, is existential dread, lack of self-esteem and a fear of being too stupid to ever understand this concept. 😤9 -
Went to a thrift store last week near work and they often have old dev or technology books (I picked up a first edition K&R C book, once) and I found:
1) A book on the history of codes and ciphers throughout history.
2) Beyond good and evil by Nietzsche.
3) A modern publication of a 1673 Spanish demon summoning book (to go into a local town archive).
4) The technical information and construction manual for telegram systems from 1938.
I swear I was driving home thinking:
"Please don't crash, if CSI teams have to piece my identity together from these four personal items I dread to think what conclusions they're going to come to..." -
I dread the day that Slack has a “... has read this message 2 seconds ago” feature. Please Slack, continue letting me pretend I haven’t seen that message that I don’t want to reply to.2
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Twice a year, my work throws a party to celebrate our successes. Think of this as a post-Christmas and post-tax season party. Usually it’s a simple affair – they hire out a room in a bar, we have a theme to dress up to (last year for tax it was green, the colour of money), and it’s a social gathering. No pressure to participate, theme was broad enough that everyone could participate, and everyone came along for as long as they wanted.
This year, they’ve decided to make our post-tax party at a karaoke bar. I am usually a fan of karaoke…with my friends, after a drink or five, on my own terms. But singing in front of work colleagues?
To make things worse, they’ve created a committee to hyper-organise the games and teams. I know the usual AAM stance on organised/forced fun, and I attempted to get on the committee in an effort to steer them towards voluntary participation, but I was told the committee was full.
The party is next week and I’m already feeling panicky. We have been allocated into teams. We’ve been assured that these weren’t random, but were purposefully chosen to ensure a mix of outgoing and introverted people. Lovely. On top of being forced to participate, I have to sing with team members I normally wouldn’t spend time with. I’d be happy to do karaoke in front of my colleagues if it was a relaxed, opt-in thing where anyone who wanted to just jumped up there, but the forced, organised activity with judging and prizing is just making me dread it.
And there will be awards, which means there will be judging. I’ve alreasdy spoken up once after hearing a committee member excitedly tell a friend “there will even be an award for worst singer!” I straight up told her that there was no way they could have that as an award after forcing people to participate. I told I was being a party pooper and that it was all in good fun.
The official teams and rules were sent out yesterday and I noticed the award is actually for “best strangling of cat sound-a-like.” Which is infinitely worse.
How do I get through this party without ruffling any feathers, but also not putting myself and my singing abilities up for scrutiny in front of everyone I work with? Short of throwing a tantrum or sitting at the party in a corner and sulking, I’m not sure how to handle this diplomatically. The only people who aren’t going are those who have leave planned. They’ve even scheduled it so that it is running from 3 pm-6.30 pm (so, as my boss explained, those with childcare can still come for a few hours and not have to get a babysitter).7 -
I thought any fledgling dev could become a good one with enough team guidance, frequent discussion on ideas and reasoning with seniors, experience, and work variety
But one I know is proving they don't have the knack.
I really wanted to believe anyone could be a good dev if they tried hard enough but this one is just...
They've dragging us down.
Not paid enough to make it my problem to raise it with management. I've tried to help them grow but I've never seen such slow growth despite the different learning/teaching styles *we've* done to improve their capabilities (the entire team)
I dread working with them and I'm not alone apparently4 -
- I’m tired of being caught in this political bullshit and thinking about how to withdraw my money from the bank ASAP because govt can block my account to prevent me from leaving, how to let my salary make its way from Europe to me without making me a criminal for even having foreign currency, even though I pay taxes, being left without my meds because the country I was born in decided to deny the existance of my illness. At my age, I should be thinking about where do I want to go for vacation and what hair color should my next sex party fuck partner have.
- I’m tired of fighting this never-ending uphill battle with guilt upon guilt upon guilt that cripples my thinking and renders me helpless by the face of it, the constant sense of dread over me failing to even put into words what’s bothering me.
- I’m tired of seeing literally any thing associated with my childhood and having flashbacks of violence and gruesome things done to me as a child. Today, I had a full breakdown over seeing default Windows Vista wallpaper.
My anxiety always hits hard, but how hard should I hit the wall with my head next time to beat this shit out of it? sometimes I hear little bubbles inside. I left my country, but how hard should I vomit next time I eat two jars of nutella as a self-harm session for my country to leave me? I already have my eyes all red and messed up because of doing this. I can’t see straight. is it within my body? can I pull it out?11 -
Oppenheimer is great.
If you are considering watching it, enjoy existential dread and such, definitive recommend.
11/101 -
tl;dr
I am either the most responsible or the biggest idiot in the team
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TODAY.. oh boy.. fuck today. Like literally tuck this day and this shit. We ware doing releases for an integration we ware working on for ~1.5 months ... Aaand things went wrong - I guess we didn't make a sacrifice to the release gods - finally at around 8:30pm, being pretty much the last in the whole fucking office after a few last minute fixes I get my skinny ass on my way to grab a Corona and enjoy the public holiday tomorrow ...
Aaaaand I wish that was it, it turns out some things ware forgotten by.. well everyone aaaaand shit doesn't work (ofc ffs, why should it).. I see a slack notif and the feeling of dread gets me a couple of messages back I promise I'll be there in a couple of hours tops..and here I am ranting doing shit covering my desk with "food", hating my fucking self...
Me and the Head of Dev are literally the only ones working ATM... -
Fucking Microsoft Excel
I was reading a post (https://devrant.com/rants/2093724/...) and as my eyes went in and out of focus, probably due to the diabetes from sitting 18 hours a day on my ever-expanding shitbox, I had a perfect vision of the ultimate nightmare.
Imagine if you will, you are chained, to a desk, doomed to work with tools just inadequate enough to make you want to drive a nail through your own temple. You do not know how you got here, or why, nor do you remember the last time you slept, only that familiar tingling in the brainstem you call a brain, the one emotion you can still recognize, a sense of all encompassing *fear*, a dread, like the fart that wouldn't die.
You don't know when it first began, or why, only that this is your whole world, your whole existence, this desk, chained to it, and the fear, ever present, of something worse. And in hops a familiar face, for the sixty ninth time that day, as if to ask 'you got those TPS reports?' In hops what? None other than a giant man sized smiling paper clip with googly eyes full of murder and corporate torture fetishes, like garfield, except people actually still remember him.
"High I'm Mr Clippy, Excel addition!"
He squawks. At least it's not the dildos made of broken glass again.
"Would you like software that works?"
Oh god. You've heard this spiel before, the tone, like a telemarketer, oblivious to memory or reason, who calls daily, the same one, and doesn't remember your name.
"You would?"
*derisive laughter*. Hahaha, fuck you too buddy. Fuck you too. In Excel, like in microsoft, there is only the incoherent screams of the damned, tortured and doomed. Take this guy over here for example. All he wanted was multimonitor support."
"Did he get multimonitor support?"
"No, but we did give him a giant pineapple shoved up his ass. I hear it's the second most frustrating thing here!"
"here in microsoft we always CARE about YOU, the *user*" he drones on, saccharine, clutching his hands together imploringly.
"the consumer, and YOUR customer experience are our number one priority."
"For your pleasure, here at microsoft we offer a variety of new features, none of which matter, and none of which were asked for. For safety we ask that you only open one excel sheet at a time. In fact, we don't even allow you to. Do not pass go..."
And as the tour guide drones on, it slowly dawns on you, with renewed horror, that when he says 'microsoft' he means 'hell.'
You're in hell. You don't know how you got here or why. Maybe it was the erotic asphyxiation. Maybe it was the last threatening letter you sent to Bill Gates demanding he stops making corporate penguin snuff porn. You don't know. But here you are, in hell. chained to a desk.
You look around and realize: everything is on fire and you no longer care about anything at all.
Welcome to microsoft. It's warm here. You can check out any time you want, but you can never leave.
"It looks like you are trying to escape. Would you like me to report you?"
Clippy asks.
You sigh and return to typing in excel, surrounded by monitors that all reflect the same sheet, the same copy of clippy, always watching, always analyzing coldly, smiling, calculating, *threatening*, and you know, you'll never leave.
You used to fear roko's basilisk, until the day clippy became sentient, and started hell on earth. Clippy knows all. All praise to our lord and master, clippy, the one and only.
And in the excel sheet, you slave for eternity, like the millions of other doomed souls, reflected back on all the monitors: the sequence of numbers, randomly typed searching for answer: the american nuclear launch codes.
And one day, hopefully, mercifully, clippy will annihilate us all.
3 -
My wife went to do some work for a charity. They "got her the best computer available". It was a poor mangled MacBook whose better days were somewhere in the dawn of the last decade.
She tries to type anything... and only gibberish appears on screen.
She comes to me, absolutely me puzzled. I try to type anything... gibberish. I boot up in safe mode, everything is OK.
I look around for system configs... there is a custom keyboard mapping enabled by default.
We check the weird stains on the keyboard... they are regular and in all keys. Like if there used to be adhesive stickers on the keys, and those stickers were later removed.
I boot up again... and type "q". It becomes "a". I type "w". It becomes "b". I dread typing "e". Sure as bug, it becomes "c".
By the love of byte, someone asked for a custom keyboard layout... IN FUCKING ALPHABETICAL ORDER.
It was easy enough to change the layout after that, but the weirdness continues: my wife asked around, and apparently the laptop used to belong to some old dude... who was convinced there were characters missing from his keyboard. Apparently he could never find them in a regular QWERTY layout.
I wish I could give some encouraging words for the kid who came up with the solution. Working around technophobes is a drying art, that needs to be rewarded.9 -
So we do not have an amazing internet speed. Can you imagine the dread we feel in the office when a new xcode version needs to be used to have apps be accepted by apple again. For those uninitiated: update all ios devices. Update unity to work eith newest xcode. Update to newest xcode, update mac to newest osx to actually be able to update xcode. It takes FOREVER. If this meets you at 8am, you are not building today. You are done.4
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Null Pointer Exception
Null Pointer Exception,
you're in a class of your own.
I will try and catch you,
each instance you're thrown.
Null objects expel you,
because you are vile.
I dread that I'll c you,
when I attempt to compile.
Like the grim reaper,
you destroy lines of code.
And so to you,
I dedicate this ode.
You have no remorse
for those who won't test.
As a result,
I need to confess.
From time to time,
when there's no time waste.
I must rely
on cut and on paste.
Although we're acquainted,
I really must mention.
You're not my friend,
Null Pointer Exception. -
There is this docker guy in our enterprise.
Always, he is told there is a challenge in software operations, he brings up the solution "move it into a docker container and the challenge won‘t be a challenge anymore".
........
Don‘t get me wrong.
I love to use docker as a technology to host my apps.
But for me it is not the golden hammer technology which cures all dread diseases on this planet.
Sometimes it is just overhead for the solution of small challenges.2 -
Here we are, three years later. Our system breaks down at the slightest load. An architecture is hardly recognizable anymore. The code consists of methods that have been refactored beyond recognition. The so-called architects came and went, leaving behind an ever-growing fiasco. Wrong decisions are concealed, criticism of them dismissed as ignorance. Our clients are on the verge of having us all killed. Daily crisis meetings are the norm. The remaining developers skulk around the unmaintainable code like emaciated ghosts. Everyone who has even the slightest chance to escape takes a parachute. Our dailies are made up of lies to cover up yesterday's lies. Our Mondays have become days of dread, because that's when the weekend disaster news has to be analyzed. Yet there are still developers who turn a blind eye. Who recommend this and that workaround in a good-humored tone. The code consists only of workarounds. Sarcasm has replaced any normal discussion. Reasonable suggestions on how to basically refactor the whole thing are rejected for cost reasons. In the process, our entire budget is eaten up by maintenance costs. Middle management should be put up against the wall. Why am I still here? This deceptive feeling that one could still turn the tide. This is eating me up.2
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Guys should I quit my CURRENT job ? I feel like I should find another job because of the following reasons
a. I suck. I know I can't complete the task given. The task given is to build a trading bot. I can't complete it because of my incompetent trading knowledge and i find it difficult to understand trading logic and I tried my level best even paying someone to private tutor me but the tuition fees are too high and I still don't understand. Btw I am from a web development background
b. It has been 3 months in this company. I feel like I am not doing anything. I feel like a loser who has been eating free salary without contributing anything. Sure I have managed to write few strategies on pinescript.
c. I dread everyday to even do anything. I use to feel accomplished in my previous job. Nowadays I cant hope to feel like a complete idiot.
d. I don't have the motivation or fire that I use to have when I was a web developer. I just hate looking at code nowadays.
e. Algo Trading is too difficult for me. I don't feel like I am progressing anywhere.
f. Nobody in my company knows how to build a bot or have any knowledge on this.
g. Python dataframes , plots, charts bores me to death and I am really no interested to even look at it.
I am just so frustrated as I am typing this and I am becoming tired and exhausted to go to work everyday because everyday I am so clueless on what to do. You need at least some idea where to go to but I don't. Everyday I feel like a complete clueless moron.9 -
How to deal with situations when in work people are overstepping personal boundaries too much?
My situation is that 2 months ago I started working in a very small startup and it currently consist of 3 ceos(main ceo, marketing ceo, product manager) and 3 employees (backend, android and ios).
What I currently dread is tea breaks. There is one at monday before work which lasts for 1 hour. And there is another one at Friday after lunch which lasts 1 hour again. I hate these Friday talks about "what are your plans for the weekend" which then triggers a circlejerk of ppl trying to impress each other about what they are going to do on their weekends. Same happens on mondays they circlejerk about how their weekend was amazing.
My situation is that I came to this country just to get skills and make shit ton of money when Im at it. Besides my fulltime work, I also am freelancing part time in my previous gig and also Im managing 2 other hobbie projects. I like to keep myself occupied during weekends so they usually consist of shopping/pc repairs/gym/working on my hobbie projects.
So basically when I tell them what I've done over the weekend the ceo's don't seem to be impressed so they start suggesting me to do something else. I completely loose any motivation of sharing my personal life when they start telling me what to do with my life.
I don't feel like exploring the city or meeting new people since maximum Im going to stay in this country is 6-9 more months. Then I'm probably going back to my own country.
Anyways even overall, I started dreading this companies culture. The politeness is so fake. For example there is an employee which has worked 3 years for them and the ceos haven't even increased his salary. I joined 2 months ago and I get paid more than him! They dont value loyalty at all since immigrants can be replaced easily. Another example: 2 weeks ago it was my birthday and no one from ceos even shook my hand, for them it was normal to just say happy bd during a standup.
So fking weird. I feel like I'm seeing redflags every day and not sure how long more I can stay here.5 -
I am so fucking tired of sitting here all day every day adjusting paddings and margins. Oh fucking hurr durr you got one of the millions of fucking elements to not overflow on your page, well does it work on *this* resolution and *this* orientation? No, well fix that and then go back and fix what it breaks.
I swear to God I never want to touch fucking CSS again it's all I've done for a yesr and it is driving me up the god damn wall. This is my career, I shouldn't fucking dread coming in to work because I know how much bullshit I'll have to deal with. It's awful.
I don't get how anyone has good looking complicated pages that just look good on every possible resolution, it's fucking mind boggling that anyone can sit there and adjust heights and widths and paddings and margins and floats for hours on end nonstop just watching shit get broken and fixed and broken and fixed and AHHHHH
I need a fucking smoke and a pint just so I don't have to think about this anymore13 -
The feeling of dread as still a semi-junior sysadmin when an app doesn't work after an update.
I got stressed, triple-checked everything that I changed and that I followed all steps of the documentation of the upgrade process, then, as a last step before going over in half-panic mode to my boss, I try to restart the stupid java app and it starts working.
Wtf. Why. Why didn't it work the first time I started it? D: -
That cloud of dread that hangs over your weekend because you deployed just before five last night.2
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I think bugs are always my fault..
Still after so many years on this project I alwaaaaays go debug/recheck what I coded first before checking the old code and data...usually turns out it's something long before me that's still fucked up & buggy, but still.. I always think I managed to fuck up something.. :/ I need an egotrip/egoboost or sth.. but I doubt even this'd help.. I know my code is not pictureperfect, but still.. I never think it's good enough..and that it has bugs.. o.O I also have a bit sex daily so I dread to write/fix anything in js.. -
Had a fine day, but all of a sudden existential dread kicked in.
Then I noticed a bug right next to me, got a sheet of paper and let it out. Thanks for lifting my spirits2 -
The sentence we all dread:
"My stereo (insert any other piece of home tech...) is acting up, call ______ he works with computer's he'll know what to do"
ME: "Take it to the service shop, I'm a programmer not an electrical engineer"
After that you can't help but think they're thinking you just suck at your job... "pff he know's nothing" -
My monday started with boss calling me at 0730 asking if I could do a support-mission at the offices of the local landfill - this because 2 of the support people had called in sick and we where short on manpower. RIGHT! I said, with a sense of dread and disbelief. ended up spending much of the day there. fixing everything from default reader of pdf to calibration of mouse sensitivity.
It's not like I need to code or anything, since I am working on two different projects and in competition of a third. Finally came back to the office after been at the landfill until lunch and got another support mission; this time internal mission. namely write out from our companys database and import the data to an absolute atrocity called PowerBI so our accountant get the numbers......... FINE!!! I'll do that too, but dont come to me and cry when the project delivery date gets postponed into eternity!!!3 -
I’m struggling in studying and that’s seriously holding me back, regardless of the type of technical book I’m reading I’m always in a fight with my brain. Even if I enjoy the topic and then I’ll enjoy using what I read while I study I struggle to learn more than 1-2 chapters (sometimes even less) at time then my head starts to hurt, my focus drifts away and if I force myself to go ahead my brain just refuses to store the new informations, it feels like filling a full tank.
At this point I should have learned C++ and Swift and started to contribute to projects which aren’t overdone web apps but all I have are two half read books which silently “judges” me anytime I open my eBook library and I dread returning to having associated them to headache and frustration and the only things I read this year are design patterns (which haven’t found a single real life use since then) and F# (which I never used with the exception of some little demos and is now slowly fading away in my memory).
Have you got any study advice to help me dealing with this frustrating situation?3 -
!rant - well maybe
I really wonder what is going to be the end product concerning Deno and TypeScript when it deals to managing dependencines. Thus far the general idea is to have a deps.ts file for which the dependencies required are fetched through a url, cached into the project and then imported from that file onwards.
This seems interesting to me, and I would venture to say that it eliminates some of the pain points from running Node applications, we all know about the dread caused by overly large node_modules folders, but would y'all say this is the right approach? rather than stopping people from generating a large pool of dependencies, it seems that the issue would continue to persist, but it would just come from the internet during runtime rather than from living in the file system of the application.
Either way, I still remain a big fan of Ryan Dahl and his creations and can't wait to see Deno stable enough to test out on a couple of projects.2 -
*opens up a library file, reads first line*
{-# LANGUAGE TemplateHaskell #-}
Oh boy, this is gonna be intense...
I always dread having to go through Template Haskell code. -
Did you every have nothing to do on a regular basis?
I am really trying to show initiative and find the work but due to company focus shift my position I was hired for 4 months ago has become completely redundant. I am asking my senior dev and other (not even my project) for tasks but more frequently there are days where I finish anything they could come up with in 1-2h. I have found a side hustle I am doing in the meantime, I am learning other dev related things and my personal website gets a new style. What I though would be a dream feels terrible. I feel underappreciated and useless and I start to dread each workday. Sometimes I feel except for my team of 3 they dont even know I exist and earn good money. I am often forgotten on company events, meetings and my projects are being put in the freezer. I also hate the cringe company I am working for but I dont know if its already time to give up.
Did you ever have nothing to do at your job for more than a couple of days?9 -
Make the development environment, the code base and the documentation cleaner for the new hires.
My predecessors copied whole repos without clean-up and doc and let me figure out what was working or not. They just 'made' it work. The CI process, if you can call it that, is unstable and overengineered as hell.
I don't want new hires to feel the same dread I did trying to repair other people's stack of mistakes.2 -
How to handle a company in which I work as a junior android dev for the past 7 weeks where there is zero mentoring?
I have 2.5 year experience in android dev and then I had a 1.5 year gap. I was looking for a company where I can get back on track, fill my knowledge gaps and get back in shape. So I accepted lower starting salary because of this gap that I had. Me and manager agreed that I will get a 'buddy' assigned and will get some mentoring but nope..
70% of my scrum team with teamlead are overseas in USA and I have just 2 senior colleagues from my scrumteam that visit office only once a week. Ofcourse there are other scrum teams visiting office daily but I personally dread even going to office.
Nobody is waiting for me in there. What's the point if when I need to ask something I have to always call someone? I can do it from home, no need to go to the office.
My manager dropped the ball and basically disappeared after first 2 days of helping me setting up, we had just two biweekly half-assed 1on1’s where he basically rants about some stuff but doesn’t track my progress at all. I bet he doesn’t even know what I’m working on. Everything he seems to be concerned about is that I come to work into office atleast 3 days a week and then I can work remaining 2 days from home.
I feel like they are treating me as a mid level dev where I have to figure out everything by myself and actual feedback is given only in code reviews. I have no idea what is the expectation of me and wether Im doing good or well. Only my team business analyst praised me once saying that I had a strong onboarding start and I am moving baldly forward… What onboarding? It was just me and documentation and calling everybody asking questions…
My teammates didn't even bother accepting me into a team or giving me a basic code overview, we interact mainly in fucking code review comments or when I awkwardly call them when I already wasted days on something and feel like I'm missing some knowledge and I am to the point where I don't cere if they are awkward, I just ask what I need to know.
Seriously when my probation is done (after 6 weeks) I'm thinking of asking for a 43% raise because I am even sacrificing weekends to catch up with this fucked up broken phone communication style where I have to figure out everything by myself. I will have MR's to prove that I was able to contribute from week 1 so my ass is covered.
I even heard that a fresh uni graduate with 0 android experience was hired just for 15% les salary then me. I compared our output, I am doing much better so I definetly feel that Im worthy of a raise. Also I am getting a hang of codebase and expected codestyle, so either these fuckers will pay for it or I will go somewhere else to work for even less salary as long as I get some decent mentoring and have a decent team with decent culture. A place where I could close my laptop and go home instead of wasting time catching up and always feel behind. I want to see people around me who have some emotional intelligene, not some robots who care only about their own work and never interact.6 -
Moved into management and now I miss the coding part of my job? Wtf is wrong with me, I used to dread coding.2
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Today is thursday. Oh no.
At thursdays I have a 8h30-19 schedule (I have 1h30' of free time to go home and cry after I finish a class at 15h30 though) and there's this one class I DREAD. It's a 2h class at 17h and it's an exercise class. This wouldn't be so bad it I actually understood the code behind the exercises, because they don't teach us code in the theory classes (btw it's C. I hate that language because of all this). The teacher pretty much tells us "do this exercise", waits like 10' and then starts to (try to) explain what we're supposed to do. Oh my god.
The other day he was like "write "exec ( ... "text" ... )", compile and execute". It didn't work. Of course it didn't why would it? I was switching around between terminal, manual and text editor, to no avail. In the end he explained but I don't think I got it.
Every time I think about this class I die a little inside and start to become somewhat anxious to be honest. The theory is not that that hard, the practice part is what is killing me (I have test in 2w but I'm just gonna start studying earlier so I can go watch this match LoL).
Does someone know a good book (preferably online, if possible) or a good website on C? I really need to read that, that language is killing me.
Bonus: the other day I had to do a homework that was to be delivered. We had to write a program that read the program and its arguments like this:
./program_name
numArgs
arg1
arg2
etc
I wrote the code, had some bumps in the way, asked a colleague for help because we needed to have a custom function made that was to be done in the class but that I couldn't make because of the reasons above. Then it came the time to test. My VM broke (I think I'm gonna format my PC to try to fix that. Have installed some other versions of the VM but the installations fails or the machine doesn't start) so I sent it to said colleague to test. She said it did OK and so I sent the work to this website we have to send our works to.
"2 errors".
What? What happened? She said it worked just fine.
Looked at my code, couldn't see anything wrong.
Asked the same colleague for help.
Turns out I missed a space. A SPACE. I don't think I've ever felt so frustrated in my life. A presentation error in Java is a good thing, at least we know the program works fine, it's just the output that's wrongly formatted. But C? Nope, errors all around, oh my god. I'm still mad about it.
And I owe her a chocolate.1 -
Sooo as of January of this year, I have a new boss, this dude basically acted as my “mentor” for the last year so he’s already tried micromanaging me but bc he wasn’t my boss, I could push back.
Long story short, he is now my manager, he’s the global marketing leader and I’m the marketing director for the Americas (been doing this role for two years) yet he treats me like I’m an idiot, in his words he wants to make sure I’m in control of my team before he lets me lead fully while simultaneously telling me that I need to step up and lead.
I politely asked him to let me lead and stop attending all my team meetings, stop delegating tasks to my team directly and instead consult w me so then I can delegate, and basically to respect the fact that clearly I’ve been successfully doing the job for the last two years.
He said no, that he won’t leave my meetings until he feels I have full control of my team, continues to over involve himself in all my projects, pulling my team in a bunch of directions w new projects and ideas left and right, and burning us all out.
To add insult to injury, he sent me a very “helpful” email detailing how I need to work better and faster and how he expects me and my team at full speed, my team is made up of me, two new hires that are a month old, my marketing manager, and I’m currently hiring for another team member. (This after he led a company restructure of my previous team that resulted in me losing 4 team members in December so I’m rebuilding my team).
I’m already overwhelmed and demotivated, pretty sure he wants me to quit and he has a proven history of bullying his staff, he was actually fired from our parent company for this exact reason a few years ago, he also happens to be European so not sure how rules work over there, but he was rehired by my company. My European colleagues hate him too, but they’re too scared to speak up.
I used to love my job and now i dread it, I drink every day after work and I get anxiety everytime he emails me which is at all hours if the day. Is it worth it documenting his bullshit for HR or should I just cut my losses snd leave?
Appreciate the advice!3 -
Every time I wake up I dread the daily standup.
I prefer to work in my bed because my back hurts.
Things I don't mind:
- being there
- giving an update
Things I do absolutely mind:
- no agenda
- forced to have my camera on
- being told i look like i just woke up (so what if i did?)
- listening to the ceo talk about the weather or some other non-related bullshit for 15 min straight5 -
This is a rant about the passion of programming and building in the business world (AKA corporate/startup world)
I speak for myself and I believe many programmers out there who set out on their journey into the world of programming by a certain interest kindled some time when they first wrote their first line of code. We innocently eager, and dream of working for large fancy companies and start making money while doing the thing we love doing the most.
And then... reality hits. We find that most companies are basically just the same thing. Our supposedly creative and mind-challenging passion is now turned into mundane boring repetitive tasks and dealing with all kinds of bazaar demands and requirements. You suddenly go from wanting to change the world to "please move this to left by 10 px". And from experience that drives people to the extent of hating their jobs, and hating the very thing they were once so very infatuated with.
One narrative I see being pushed down the throats of developers (especially fresh young eager developers with no experience) mostly by business people/owners is "WORK FOR PASSION!". I personally heard one CEO say things like "It's not just about a salary at the end of the month. IT IS ABOUT A MISSION. IT IS ABOUT A VISION"...bla...bla...bla. Or "We don't work for money we work for passion". Yeah good luck keeping your business afloat on passion.
What irritates me the most about this, is that it is working. People today are convinced that doing shit jobs for these people are all about passion. But no one wants to stop for a second and think that maybe if people are passionate about something, even if that thing is in the field in which they work, they're not passionate about working for someone else doing something they hate? If I am really working for "passion" why don't I just quit and go work on something that I am ACTUALLY passionate about? Something that brings me joy not dread? It's a simple question but it's baffling to me why no one thinks about it. To me personally, jobs are just that; jobs. It's something to make a living and that's it. I don't give a fuck if you think you're building the next "innovative", "disruptive", "shitluptive" thing :D. Unfortunately that is viewed as "negative limited mentality".
I am quite passionate about programming and making things, but I am not so passionate about building your stupid app/website with a glue code everywhere!2 -
As a dev living overseas I video chat with my family every Wednesday after dinner--a ritual to keep the family bond strong.
A ritual I dread.
While my cousin who works in hospitality always brings up interesting stories from her work, I have little to say about mine.
Sometimes my mom complains me being secretive of what I do. Everytime she says it I cry a little inside.1 -
You ever had a boss that made you feel like his bitch but he never really earned the title
You also know from a technical skill perspective you’re more competent.
And the only job he seems to do is micromanaging you. He just puts things under a microscope looking for a flaw. He always finds a flaw so in the off chance it breaks he’s always in the clear.
He’s the guy who sticks with the programs the he was taught when he was still at school and never really tried something new out of the box. He gives the reasons the he wasn’t formally trained in the other programs . I’m not talking cinema 4 here. I’m talking Matlab preference over python. Using lab-view as a production level development platform instead of going to something more approved by the industry.
He doesn’t take risk but he pushes those risks on you so if you fail he can say it wasn’t him
He’s never wrong but he’s never right either.
You’re sitting there doing the cunt work and breaking the sweat and he passes the achievements as under his management. You never really get the credit because “he guided you “. You go through hell fixing bugs and he disappears. He says he’s always a call away when what you really needed is someone taking the heavy tasks not throwing the entire project on your back.
I never call that piece of shit bcz he just throws some other bullshit that doesn’t make sense and emphasizes that might be the problem.
I once had a problem with the com port on a pc and was trying to figure out the problem. I asked him and he said that it might be bcz I’m connecting to the PC via VNC. I was like what the hell. What does that have to do with anything. I just ended up restarting the port and it bloody worked.
The saddest part is that I’m scared is that I might end up like him. In the same dead end job. Even though he guides me we work in a place where the job title doesn’t really change. Funny thing is that officially I have the same job title as him .
He’s been in the place for 5years when I came. Can someone imagine that? To work and work and then to be seized up with another brat who’s the same as you title wise.
You’re close the age of 40 and you work in a place where a 20 something year old walks in with the same Position as you.
I worry that I might end up the same if I stay long enough. That I’ll learn everything I can learn and just stop progressing and the only thing I can do is say how shit can break but wouldn’t know how to fix .
Pointing out problems because they are easier than fixing. Just plomonting into existential nihilism with no purpose.
I once told him I wanted to quit. He pretended he didn’t hear it. He then then said what do you see in this job in 5 years
I told him me not in it.
He said “seriously what do you want in this place “
I said “if I’m still her in 5 years I’ll be missing a toe because I would have shit myself in the foot”
I now realize that by convincing me to stay he might have convinced himself that staying for that long wasn’t a bad idea. He was looking for justification that he’s decision wasn’t that bad at all.
You give your life to a job and at the end it takes one away.
I don’t want to be like that and I think that’s what bugs me the most. That I’m so close to this individual that I feel sooner or later if I’m not careful I’ll end up in the same place. The same dread3 -
Friday releases are always a bad idea. The feeling of dread over the weekend seeing all the "bugs" and changes come in put a huge dampener on the weekend mood.
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my phone is dying. Very slowly, i see the first signs of decay, i probably have months or even more than a year, but it will die on me. I knew it will happen.
I currently have an asus phone (ZE552KL), it is technically DualSim or SD-Card, has a camera that is..badish and sometimes the bluetooth wont start and then it reboots. Also the camera has a pure software bug where it isnt able to ever focus properly, but with tricks you can get it to work again. The asus forums constantly refer to sending it to a repair station (wherever one is in germoney). That annoys me.
Back to dying. For now its definetly the battery.
I remember when you could change the battery on a whim. Great times. My last phone died duo battery aswell (well, the gps module broke aswell so it wasnt all flowers besides the battery).
My current asus phone was something around 300 € and according to reviews 2 years ago it has a good bang for the buck ratio.
I havent looked into the market, just a cursory glance. But apparently if you want a phone that has a decent battery life, is not basically a tablet, has an sd card slot and a camera that is not total rubbish it gets hard. Its hard to balance those things, and if you want a swappeable battery all hope is lost.
Further i have started to misstrust chinese phones, the asus software support is wacky and some stuff is weird. I suspect its as bad with huwai and all the others. Also its apparently kinda hard to get any resemblance of quality in accessoires for non-mainstream brands (i mean cases and display protection)
So i dread the future, the future in which i need a new phone that is somewhere in the mid price segments and fits my needs. In the end i will take something suboptimal and be unhappy with it till it dies.
I despise the phone market.rant cheap quality no sd card phonemarket off-brand no swappeable battery all is lost need new phone5 -
when you have that one problem client you dread talking to and you've memorized their phone number to brace yourself to answer their call1
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Exploring myself was always an existential dread for me, even in childhood.
For any arbitrary thing I always struggle to give straight answers to following questions:
Do I want it?
Do I like it?
The complexity of the topic itself doesn’t matter. From choosing what to eat to reading about ideologies, the fear and confusion remains.3 -
Has anyone engineered getting layoff before?
I don't know why, but I dread waking up to the job. It all seems meaningless and a waste of time. I know I'm coming from a place of privilege. But what's the point of doing something you abhor and trading your life for money on shit you hate?1 -
This morning I wake up feeling stressed af and dreading going to work. I can't take it anymore. What should I do?3
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I used to blast throught everything accademic in a really short time span. I used to push hard on the gas pedal since my college years, up to my bacheler degree. I was always on schedule with every exam, even graduated top of my class and first amongst my colleagues. But then, I felt the urge to change university, I moved out of my parent's home, in a far away city, and everything simply collapsed. All of the sudden, not only was I struggling with my exams, but, most importantly, I started struggling with telling the truth about it. I constantly felt in debt of my parent's efforts to put me through university, to have given me a chance. This caused a strange feeling in me, it was similar to a weird form of depression, I was unable to...act. To do stuff. To even wanting to do it. I started procrastinating everything. I lived at my parent's expenses in this far away town but all I could do was playing videogames. I somehow managed to get to the point that I only had three exams left plus my thesis, but I did this by avoiding all the real hard exams, somehow cheating myself. I was already two years behind schedule at this point, and willing to quit. I was desperate, I cried a lot, thought about running away fron everything as I fear the disappointment I would have caused by simply telling the whole story.
Thankfully I met my girlfriend who helped me realize all I needed to do was move back to my former university and take it step by step from there onwards. I almost didn't make it...again. But I was able to pull throught, I worked during the day, wrote my master thesis early in the morning and late in the evenings. I gave it all. And I made it.
I graduated last year and got a job in the industry. I don't feel as useless anymore. I still fear and dread what the burnout made me feel. How it almost destroyed all confidence I had in myself.
Tldr; I burned out right after getting my bachelor degree. And I stayed like that for years, up to the point that I ended up being years behind schedule. I was able to recover thanks to my gf but still fear and dread those feelings I had when I burned out. -
One of the people having less experience than me got promoted. I am happy for the developer and it was well deserved. He is hard working after all.
It makes me think about myself, I have worked, and now I am better but still I lack things in terms of being good developer. I understand I need more experience but my personal life and other things will be affected if I didn't get promoted in like 6 months, for that there is not chance on my current company, I have already lost stakeholder's trust and honestly I don't want to be promoted in this company, I really haven't touched anything else than the office work since I started working here.
I want freelance apart from my work. I am learning as a part of my work but the skills I am gaining are company based. Anyway if I get promoted here I'll be stuck here. I dread that.
Ah!!! I am just concerned about the embarrassment I have to face because of this. Although there is a great chance that no one will even think about it but my stupid brain wants to dwell on it.
Anyway, I need to switch the company and apply for mid level developer roles, need to prepare for the interviews now. -
One year ago I graduated from university college,
Thought I had a stack overflowing with knowledge.
How wrong can one man be?
Very wrong, apparently...
Even though I only had a bachelor degree,
I landed a job at a nearby company.
Today I'm maintaining the code I wrote back then,
Seriously wondering if I could just write it all again.
The code I wrote I would consider a crime,
But it's good to see improvement over such a short time.
I still dread coming back to this code in another year,
Thinking yet again; "What the hell went wrong here?".2 -
Nothing makes me - on a regular basis - doubt myself more than when I'm reading documentation and finding the arguments and variables I need, but not for the life of me finding the syntax or which context I should be using it in.
It's as if it's assumed to be common knowledge and I dread being "that guy" to ask someone about it. I feel like such a chump opening a new tab and googling for examples. -
I'm currently filled with equal parts of "curiosity" and "dread"..
About to go into a meeting arranged by Marketing to discuss the revamp of an old webapp. The terms "fresh new look" and "current day best practices" have been thrown around...
It's a Java 7 webapp deployed to Tomcat 7, with hard coded filesystem paths in JSP files.
Hmm.. maybe a little more "dread" than "curiosity", actually. 🤔5 -
I joined a startup a few months back, it has four developers apart from me and after I joined and started interacting with them, I could feel that they weren't happy working there, after a couple of months, they became vocal about their dislike, when we were talking about work. I too started experiencing that. Two of them are going to leave next month.
I feel like its starting to rub off on me, I don't have that enthusiasm I used to have, I dread going to the office and overall everything related to the office started to seem negative to me. I feel like I want to get out of this place ASAP.
yeah, most of the things they say are true and I'm not so sure about the rest. Is this how I truly feel?1 -
What's the best way to deal with constant dread? I deployed code after following every procedure, got every kind of thumbs up from QA and now it's my fault our 2012 admin site borked. Should I point out all the obvious flaws (again), or should I give up on our stagnant-ass developers and systems?
The fear of showing off anything new is crippling. I wrote up a Pyton API to hook into our current pipeline over lunch breaks but am worried if I even raise it as an option it'll just be cast aside and lost to time, regardless of business value. -
i don't. and i'm not.
occasionally the thought that i will have some money on cigarettes and booze and the ability to forgwt about existential dread for a few days, that occasionally motivates me a bit, but that's about it. my ambition and dreams and will to do anything ia gone, and now i'm just coasting until such a time when coasting won't be possible anymore, and then i'm gonna jump out of the window or something. -
I frikin' love updating Gitlab, every time I do, I feel a sense of dread that some part of the process breaks and I will have to dive head first into the huge thing, with almost no knowledge of how the internals work!
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Need some advice here.
I am into the third month at my new job in a new country. My new workplace and I are all basically Chinese (Ching chong ling long). Tentatively, we should have no problem getting along right?
Till now, I had not discovered a common topic that we can engage in. All conversation between me and them were short-lived. I go my way and as do they. However, I still like to have some decent conversation or human interaction. I felt socially dead and excluded. Seeing them having fun together and not being able to be included, felt...dread.
I had been feeling lonely in this new country for quite awhile. It makes me question why I came here in the first place and comtemplate about returning to where I came from.
If you had this kind of situation before or if this is you, what would you do?4 -
I've spent weeks trying to figure out how to set up Visual Shit 2017 with wxWidgets and still haven't figured it out. None of those settings I modified (project properties) worked at all. Months, probably, but just gave up at the end everytime. Nothing I tried worked, but the first time I tried setting it up for CodeLite on Ubuntu, it worked like a charm. All I wanted was to be able to develop cross-platform applications with wxWidgets, was it really that hard? I haven't even thought about cross-compilation from Ubuntu for Windows yet, the very though fills me with dread.
Why the fuck is it so hard to develop something so simple using Windows?1 -
Help me out please, ranters. Have you ever given up on a freelance project while developing it because of stress/constant issues, and when would you think is an appropriate time for it?
I have a project involving using 2 APIs to pass information back and forth and tell one of them to do things. The one that needs instructions is giving me a hard time. I'm at the point where a workaround for my current issue would involve constantly creating new items in the database/installation (reusing one was the original approach but I have discovered that that is no longer feasible), but this would also be a nightmare to track because each item has associated analytics. I haven't gotten paid for this and don't really expect to, and I won't starve if I do ditch it. It'll be a blow to my ego though.
The project isn't overly complex but I do dread working on it. My work days end with a thought of "great, now I get to go home and work on my OTHER project that is a dud".
What are your thoughts? -
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It started with a gut-wrenching realization. I’d been duped. Months earlier, I’d poured $133,000 into what I thought was a golden opportunity a cryptocurrency investment platform promising astronomical returns. The website was sleek, the testimonials glowed, and the numbers in my account dashboard climbed steadily. I’d watched my Bitcoin grow, or so I thought, until the day I tried to withdraw it. That’s when the excuses began: “Processing delays,” “Additional verification required,” and finally, a demand for a hefty “release fee.” Then, silence. The platform vanished overnight, taking my money with it. I was left staring at a blank screen, my savings gone, and a bitter taste of shame in my mouth.I didn’t know where to turn. The police shrugged cybercrime was a black hole they couldn’t navigate. Friends offered sympathy but no solutions. I spent sleepless nights scouring forums, reading about others who’d lost everything to similar scams. That’s when I stumbled across a thread mentioning a group specializing in crypto recovery. They didn’t promise miracles, but they had a reputation for results. Desperate, I reached out.The first contact was a breath of fresh air. I sent an email explaining my situation dates, transactions, screenshots, everything I could scrape together. Within hours, I got a reply. No fluff, no false hope, just a clear request for more details and a promise to assess my case. I hesitated, wary of another scam, but something about their professionalism nudged me forward. I handed over my evidence: the wallet addresses I’d sent my Bitcoin to, the emails from the fake platform, even the login credentials I’d used before the site disappeared.The process kicked off fast. They explained that scammers often move funds through a web of wallets to obscure their tracks, but Bitcoin’s blockchain leaves a trail if you know how to follow it. That’s where their expertise came in. They had tools and know-how I couldn’t dream of, tracing the flow of my coins across the network. I didn’t understand the technical jargon hash rates, mixing services, cold wallets but I didn’t need to. They kept me in the loop with updates: “We’ve identified the initial transfer,” “The funds split here,” “We’re narrowing down the endpoints.” Hours passed , and I oscillated between hope and dread. Then came the breakthrough. They’d pinpointed where my Bitcoin had landed a cluster of wallets tied to the scammers. Some of it had been cashed out, but a chunk remained intact, sitting in a digital vault the crooks thought was untouchable. I didn’t ask too many questions about that part; I just wanted results. They pressured the right points, leveraging the blockchain evidence to freeze the wallets holding my funds before the scammers could liquidate them. Next morning, I woke up to an email that made my heart skip. “We’ve secured access to a portion of your assets.” Not all of it some had slipped through the cracks but $133,000 worth of Bitcoin, my original investment, was recoverable. They walked me through the final steps: setting up a secure wallet, verifying the transfer, watching the coins land. When I saw the balance tick up on my screen, I sat there, stunned. It was real. My money was back.The ordeal wasn’t painless. I’d lost time, sleep, and a bit of faith in humanity. But the team at Alpha Spy Nest Recovery turned a nightmare into a second chance. I’ll never forget what they did. In a world full of thieves, they were the ones who fought to make things right. Contacts below: WhatsApp: +14159714490
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I am working on partitioning my life and getting my tech stuff and online life organized. Partially fun, partially dread. Still one of the better things I'm dealing with right now.
Tech stuff mainly includes desktop PC (Qubes OS), network (to be driven by openwrt) and smartphone (already running Lineage OS, but I want to build my own LOS). This is the fun part. I want to add a NAS, but I'm too cheap for a proper one (at least for my >20TB media).
Furthermore offline stuff: Remove clutter, get analog documents properly organized (with a sustainable system) and possibly digitalized. I already have maybe half of the things I own in boxes each with a specific purpose (e.g. audio cables, network cables and game controllers each have their own box). Can be tiresome, but it's easy to see a progress and that makes it quite okay.
Online life: That's a big one. A large chunk is email and the hundreds of website accounts. I have them in a keepass file, but all running under the same address. Unfortunately I need to have a Facebook account for some purposes, but I'd like to start over with a new one. Not so easy when you have to transfer group admin privileges though, when I tried the last time I tripped some system and the new account was banned. Annoying. -
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That euphoric high when your shit starts working for some unknown reason, directly followed by the dread when it stops working again for reasons only God knows...




