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Search - "praying"
Its Friday, you all know what that means! ... Its results day for practiseSafeHex's most incompetent co-worker!!!
We've had a bewildering array of candidates, lets remind ourselves:
- a psychopath that genuinely scared me a little
- a CEO I would take pleasure seeing in pain
- a pothead who mistook me for his drug dealer
- an unbelievable idiot
- an arrogant idiot obsessed with strings
Tough competition, but there can be only one ... *drum roll* ... the winner is ... none of them!
*audience member: what?*
*audience member: no way!*
*audience member: your fucking kidding me!*
Sir calm down! this is a day time show, no need for that ... let me explain, there is a winner ... but we've kept him till last and for a good reason
You see our final contestant and ultimate winner of this series is our good old friend "C", taking the letters of each of our previous contestants, that spells TRAGIC which is the only word to explain C.
Oh I assure you its no laughing matter. C was with us for 6 whole months ... 6 excruciatingly painful months.
We needed someone with frontend, backend and experience with IoT devices, or raspberry PI's. We didn't think we'd get it all, but in walked an interviewee with web development experience, a tiny bit of Angular and his masters project was building a robot device that would change LED's depending on your facial expressions. PERFECT!!!
... oh to have a time machine
Working with C:
- He never actually did the tutorials I first set him on for Node.js and Angular 2+ because they were "too boring". I didn't find this out until some time later.
- The first project I had him work on was a small dashboard and backend, but he decided to use Angular 1 and a different database than what we were using because "for me, these are easier".
- He called that project done without testing / deploying it in the cloud, despite that being part of the ticket, because he didn't know how. Rather than tell or ask anyone ... he just didn't do it and moved on.
- As part of his first tech review I had to explain to him why he should be using if / else, rather than just if's.
- Despite his past experience building server applications and dashboards (4 years!), he never heard of a websocket, and it took a considerable amount of time to explain.
- When he used a node module to open a server socket, he sat staring at me like a deer caught in headlights completely unaware of how to use / test it was working. I again had to explain it and ultimately test it for him with a command line client.
- He didn't understand the need to leave logging inside an application to report errors. Because he used to ... I shit you not ... drive to his customers, plug into their server and debug their application using a debugger.
... props for using a debugger, but fuck me.
- Once, after an entire 2 days of tapping me on the shoulder every 15 mins for questions / issues, I had to stop and ask:
Me: "Have you googled it?"
C: "... eh, no"
Me: "can I ask why?"
C: "well, for me, I only google for something I don't know"
Me: "... well do you know what this error message means?"
C: "ah good point, i'll try this time"
... maybe he was A's stoner buddy?
- He burned through our free cloud usage allowance for a month, after 1 day, meaning he couldn't test anything else under his account. He left an application running, broadcasting a lot of data. Turns out the on / off button on the dashboard only worked for "on". He had been killing his terminal locally and didn't know how to "ctrl + c a cloud app" ... so left it running. His intention was to restart the app every time you are done using it ... but forgot.
- His issue with the previous one ... not any of his countless mistakes, not the lack of even trying to make the button work, no, no, not for C. C's issue is the cloud is "shit" for giving us such little allowances. (for the record in a month I had never used more than 5%).
- I had to explain environment variables and why they are necessary for passwords and tokens etc. He didn't know it wasn't ok to commit these into GitHub.
- At his project meetups with partners I had to repeatedly ask him to stop googling gifs and pay attention to the talks.
- He complained that we don't have 3 hour lunch breaks like his last place.
- He once copied and pasted the same function 450 times into a file as a load test ... are loops too mainstream nowadays?
You see C is our winner, because after 6 painful months (companies internal process / requirements) he actually achieved nothing. I really mean that, nothing. Every thing was so broken, so insecure / wide open, built without any kind of common sense or standards I had to delete it all and start again ... it took me 2 weeks.
I hope you've all enjoyed this series and will join me in praying for the return of my sanity ... I do miss it a lot.
Suddenly my KDE neon installation didn't want to start anymore. (emergency recovery shell)
Immediately searching for solutions, praying for the best...
Saw a suggestion about removing any custom /etc/fstab entries. Removed an entry i added earlier today.
Boots again right away, fuck yeah, Linux, I fucking love you ❤︎4
Dells XPS are made of magic. [long story, major fuckup, 10k+ damages]
It all started in December. One morning I was late to work, drove there as fast as possible. (I live like 3 minutes away so me being late really meant *late*) Parked my car in a secluded car park, grabbed my backpack and ran to work. The car park is like 100 meters away from work so I took my feet into my hands and ran. Next thing I know my heels loose all grip while I go down a small slope and I drop on my back full force. On a sharp edged stone. With only my 1700$ XPS in it. Fuck.
I paniced, but got up and ran to work. I checked on the notebook, praying it would boot. It booted! Holy shit. I flipped the notebook and saw two small dents in the aluminum shell. I was thorougly impressed. I later discovered that it left a small shadow on the display, but given what a hit that was (I am not exactly a lightweight), impressive would be a massive understatement.
Fast forward to February, I am weighing my options to get the screen replaced maybe, as damage on my hardware (even if neglectable) triggers some sort of OCD and makes me feel bad 24/7. Also my laptop tends to shut off from time to time, looked into the Event Viewer and saw kernel panic. I figured that the battery probably still took a hit and that it drops voltage from time to time and the kernel assumes a critical situation, thus shutting off.
It stayed quite snowy in Austria up until March, so occasional snowing wasn't rare. Got out of work one day, saw it snowed a bit. Whatever. I had my moms car at the time, so I tried if it would slide a bit if I donut on the now (5pm) empty parking space. Nothing. Drove done a small hill, ABS triangle lit up red (board computer can't outbalance the snow). I drove out to the main street where everything was salted and drove along towards my house. Took a turn into my street, accelerated for a bit and then went off the gas so the car would smoothly drive along with the speed slowly degrading. So I went off the gas and noticed I was a bit to the right, no wonder, centrifugal forces.
"Huh seems like I need a bit more"
*car still doesnt move much*
"What the- go to the left!"
*steers left hard*
"Fuck that wall is coming closer"
*car doesnt break*
"FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK!!!"
Everything got quiet in seconds, me waking up to an open airbag, ripped pants, a hurting wrist, the radio somewhere on the ground and fumes that smellt like burning wires. I grabbed my backpack that was now somewhere on the floor instead of on the seat and ran outside, tears in my eyes and the phone on my ear calling my mom. I walked inside as she walked outside, hearing a weeping scream that I haven't heard from her since I am alive. While walking inside I noticed my backpack was wet on the bottom, my 2 litre water jug shattered when my backpack hit the dashboard. I tried to stay calm and act rational, knowing that every second counts when It comes to water damage. I hastely searched for some rice and a bag to put my laptop into, stuffed the bag with both and went outside. The car was totaled, my mom pissed and crying. And I was in shock, sad, angry and hurting.
I kept the laptop on my heater for a few days, bagged in rice. I dared to try a boot after a while and you wont believe me, it fucking booted. Even the keyboard backlight worked, just the screen was obviously broken in the back (no color distortion or bad pixel rows though!!) and the aluminum shell had a dent on the front. I talked with Dell Support a few days later, asking if it would be ok to open the XPS up so I could drain all of the water. She said yes thats fine, as long as I dont touch anything or screw around with it.
She said I can send it in and get it checked, but the pickup and analysis will cost 150$ and I can go from there.
I sent it in and estimated that, because battery, screen and other things probably needed changing, it will be around 900$.
Got a call a few weeks later:
"Hello beggarboy, the repair team reported back to us and said that they will have to replace everything, which will be 1700$."
"Fuck... Buying a new one is cheaper.."
"Yeah I know I am sorry about that, I can offer you a voucher so you can buy a new one for 250$ off if you would prefer that"
"Sorry but I will need some time to consider"
The agent clearly noticed I was bummed about it.
After going back and forth what to do I got another call a few days later.
"Hello beggarboy, we talked a few days ago. I have good news"
"Hello, yes, speak up?"
"I was able to get a special offer for you after putting in a few words..."
The next thing she said seemed unreal to me.
She was able to cut 600$ (!!!), making the new offer 1100$, instead of 1700$ or a new one for 1500$. I figured the reason she probably did that was because I am always very polite with support members. Always.
My XPS is back and healty again.
Thank you for taking the time to read this.
Dells XPS are made of magic.13
So before today, I'd never used GoDaddy before. Not even once. My supervisor walks in and happily informs me that I'm going to be adding photos to a website that she does editing for. Okay, fine, that's stupidly easy. What I did not realize, however, is that this entire website had been built using GoDaddy's site builder, and if you're not familiar with it, thank whatever gods you worship that you've dodged that bullet. I hardly want to go wandering around somebody else's web hosting, so I search about for a bit praying that there's SOME semblance of a normal text editor someplace, because text editors make me happy and all, and find very little on the regular site. Already not thrilled. So I figure, how bad is this site editor? Really, how bad can it possibly be?
Oh, you poor misguided son of a -
Anyway, I go in and look at the site. Slideshows everywhere, nothing is aligned correctly, it's a web designer's nightmare. Thankfully, I'm not a web designer, so I press on and reorganize a little bit. I try slapping a new slideshow on their, and discover that unlike the way it SHOULD work, elements do not move to allow for other elements, they just sit there and let you throw things on top of them. I stare at my neatly-stacked slideshows for a second in utter disbelief, knowing but not really accepting that I'm going to need to take every last one of those slideshow elements and slide those little so-and-so's down by hand. ....why? Who designed this? Who decided that was a good idea? I do some Googling to see if there's anything out there to make this less horrid, and lo and behold I find a GoDaddy page about their FTP file manager! It's under web/classic hosting, which apparently means it's deprecated because I spent the next ten minutes hunting around for the "web hosting" link those chicken-lickers were so proud of and it's nowhere to be found.
Alright, so they want to do this the hard way.
At this point I'm screaming internally and PRAYING that I'm just being stupid and not seeing anything to make it easi-
No, not even easier. Just less stupid. This website builder makes no sense. It's like hiring a contractor to build a bridge and handing him a box of Legos and a banana.
So I do more googling and find instructions on getting to the file manager. FINALLY. The first step is find "Hosting" under "My Products." I rush over to My Products joyfully, hoping I can get this stupid website up and running reasonably quickly, and...!
There's no hosting tab.
Not even a little hard-to-see link. At this point my brain is screaming. WHY would you give me a website builder but absolutely no way to actually write the website? Do people actually use this thing? I mean, I get it if they want to make it nice and accessible for people to make websites without overwhelming them with HTML but if they know how to edit the website and they don't want your help, why would you force me in to this? Why? Then it occurred to me that maybe the organization just hasn't ever had a web developer in it, ever, or at least not one who was willing to help out with the website, so they purposefully signed up for hosting that deprived them of any kind of HTML editor. Then on top of all of that, I noticed that on the home page, which had been edited by someone else long before I ever looked at it, ALSO had one of these stupid slideshows that I had to reorganize by hand, and some sad, angry little man had put in one of the photos sideways. It was SIDEWAYS. Just sitting there on its side, the photo's occupants staring at me with sad eyes begging me to turn them facing up again. I sat there and stared at a badly-designed website in a questionably-designed editor. And I wondered. I wondered who put this all together, and I wondered why *I* was the one doing it, when I work for a university and the website was for some beach homeowner's association. And I wondered if this job was a task that my supervisor had agreed to do and just passed off onto an office monkey. And I wept bitter tears at the realization that I am that office monkey.7
No boss... For the fucking millionth time: unit tests are not a waste of time.
You keep testing everything manually and hoping that you tested everything every time and praying that there are no bugs IS THE FUCKING TIME WASTE
My boss just can't fucking wrap his head around automated tests... I'm trying hard... Gonna try harder...6
I've a recently joined developer hired from campus sitting next to me.
She: I'm printing an array in Java but it's not working. Could you please check what's wrong?
I see this piece of code:
Me: Where is the printArray method?
She: (With a puzzled look) Oh, do I have to declare that?
Me: 😶😶😶 (lowered my head, walked away slowly praying for the company)9
My second year of high-school, we started having class in computer science. I was really looking forward to it cause I always wanted to learn programming.
On first sight it appeared that the professor which taught the class knew something, he looked like a genuine geek with those dorky glasses, briefcase and pants like Steve Urkel, but after couple of his lessons you could see he had no real dev experience and just basic understanding of programming in theory. He was more reading stuff from the book than he was trying to explain them to students and give some real world examples.
So it was just one these days, everybody got back from vacation, it's hot outside, the guy is just reading sentences from his book, half of students talk with each other and other half doesn't give a fuck about him or his class. Pretty sure I was the only one trying to listen to him and learn something from his recitals.
All of a sudden he notices the atmosphere in the classroom, slams the book shut, gives out couple of F-s to the loudest students and yells out loud "NONE OF YOU IN THIS ROOM WILL EVER ACCOMPLISH ANYTHING IN YOUR LIFE, BARE ALONE IN PROGRAMMING"
At first I felt like shit, but soon after that I started thinking "who the hell are you to tell me what I could or will accomplish in my life". Couple weeks later I've bought myself a first book in programming and started learning C++ late at night since I understood that I won't learn anything about programming in that school. Two years later I was correcting this same professor with his claims on a whiteboard in front of a whole class.
Today, seven years after his words I'm a developer living in foreign country with what I could say somewhat a solid experience and understanding of how both software and web are build, while that same professor still recites to his pupils difference between assembly and object code, while praying nobody asks him where and how these are used. For maybe a quarter of my paycheck. So much about his psychic powers..4
Typical Tuesday morning. Got word that a client was having trouble viewing a mp4 video, thats being used as a background element on their website, on their iphone.
No biggie, I think to myself.
An hour in Im praying to the safari Gods and cursing the existence of iOs (or however the hell you spell it).
While debugging I realise the browser gives up on downloading the video 2 seconds in, the same way I gave up watching that Netflix Neath note abomination, two seconds in.
So i quickly write up an ajax script forcing the browser to download the file before displaying it...F.I.G.J.A.M
But hold up 'webkitURL' is deprecated. Please use 'URL' instead ..dafuq ?
Okay okay I got this just use a work around for that ..aaand done.
Should be working right? Wrong (-_-)
Half an hour later searching stackoverflow like its the gospel and judgement is upon me and I found the solution..I found the solution, simple stupid solution that would make you wanna facepalm so hard that your great grandkids would have marks on their face.
Declare the MIME type in the bloody source tag in the html ... shoot me now3
Lately I've been losing sleep dreaming about how to fix my code, but client I have been praying hard to make you happy 😜😜3
year 1: hoping and praying no-one asks you to do anything on the big scary command line
year 5: if I have to leave the safe haven of my terminal to use some GUI nonsense, someone's gonna pay10
Came back from vacation today to find out that some FUCKTURD PIECE OF SHIT deleted my virtual server!! Tried to find any traces on who that SHITFACED NUTSACK was without luck. This server is hosting several websites, some having files and data stretching over more than 10 years! Spent the day praying to GOD that my equally old backup scripts had run and where the FLYING FUCK those files were saved. Luckily the script had worked and I found a recent backup so now I can start the restore process on another machine. But still. WTF!!??6
Client: Yo, there's like a 30k difference between the invoices in the application and paypal.
CTO: Yeah, that's really sad. Btw, did you know that our payment gateway supports credit cards, which won't be shown in paypal?
I'm writing this in a funny tone, but I was the person who basically implemented every aspect of accounting in that application, so I praying silently 😅1
That moment that you get some kind of pretty critical error/bug/crash in an application in production and you can't reproduce it anymore and you're just sitting there praying that it won't happen again 😥4
*Me after writing a piece of code and praying to god that there are no errors.*
My pc: 1 error(s) found.
Me : "I hate coding. I hate coding. I hate coding."
*Tries everything to solve that problem.*
My pc: No errors found.
Me: "I love coding.Yay xD"2
An hour before my Mathematical Expression and Reasoning for Computer Science final...
Have reviewed all the material available but past exams are useless because new_prof == new_format.
This is not even a rant, I'm just scared because to get into the major I need an average between this and programming of 82. I fucked up in the second midterm and got a 50/100. Everything was so perfect (at least above 80) and now I need more than 70 in this final. I'm feel I can get more than 70 but I had the same feeling during the midterm I fucked up.25
There are numerous horror stories about Windows updates, but Mac updates aren't better. Yesterday I updated to Catalina (reluctantly), and when the computer restarted I was silently praying "Please don't fuck up my VMs".
Naturally, it fucked up VMware...8
I sat down at 7pm to work on my app. Pull from Github, have a million gradle errors even though literally nothing changed, and Android Studio wants to update itself and the whole sdk. Long story short, it's now 9:56pm and I'm praying gradle doesn't fail so I can finally get to work on something...4
* Driving... Thinking about code.
* Walking... Thinking about code.
* Lying down... Thinking about code.
* Sitting down... Thinking about code.
* Eating... Thinking about code.
* Conversating... Thinking about code.
* Praying... Thinking about code.
* Partying... Thinking about code.
* Pooing... Thinking about code.
* Bathing... Thinking about code.
* Eyes closed... Thinking about code.
* Eyes open... Thinking about code.
Genie... I think you already know my wish.12
When I left school I decided to apply for a junior dev role. I received a call back later that day and they tried to sell me access to some course with the promise of a job afterwords. They gave me a website to visit to find more information.
I Googled the company and found that it was as I suspected a scam and that they had been praying on the jobless for sometime.
So, I played around on the site they told me to visit for a while and found a rather simple SQLI. I managed to pull the admin email/password (which they stored as plain text) the email address belonged to a Gmail account.
I tried the password for the Gmail account turns out the account belongs to the person running the scam. I find an email from the hosting account and you guessed it the password was the same.
I pulled the site down and replaced it with a picture of the person running the scam along with his name and the words "I'm a dirty scammer".
Then I sent all the info to the police (he'd been running a few others scams too) not sure what that lead to I didn't hear anything back.1
suddenly our web got a lot of traffic. So, instead of increasing our server (we (think) don't have permission for that), we praying until the traffic back to normal.
10 minutes later, it does.4
Tfw GitHub app is forcing you to push to master and you do so because you're an idiot, and your agnostic ass starts praying to god(s) nothing goes wrong.2
MASSIVE UPGRADE ROUND 2:
We took it by steps, the DBA did his portion and I did mine, we had waited for the entire thing to be finalized today on Sunday since our users are probably jerking off to their waifus (as they should) and today was my part. MA BOE the DBA was with me the entire time and the whole process took us about 4 hours of both of us getting multiple heart attacks here and there and praying to the elder gods of Asgard for their devine protection as we venture into the calamity of fire and juten ass mfkers that are our fucking servers for this particular process.
Man I really hope for the pandemic to be over and take my dude out for a nice beer, some wings and some relaxation time.
Best DB/Dev team I have ever been with.8
Software engineering is slowly being lowered to a basic skill to please corporations that literally want you to automate your job away. The only fruitful areas of software engineering that I can see being relevant in the next 10 years are those mixed with other hard sciences such as bioinformatics, robotics, bleeding edge statistics and mathematics (AI research), physics, etc. The trend I see right now is that software engineering is being integrated with business-oriented degrees or arts degrees, targeted programs towards beginners offered for free or low prices. There's going to be a higher barrier of entry for the jobs that are actually worth the stress and I'm praying I'll be able to catch the train before it leaves the station.9
Me: I don't understand, why is this not working?
After a few hours of debugging and continuous re-starting the server and most important praying to GOD
Me: F**k! how is this working? Ok let's not touch it, it's working
Just realizing now that I've probably spent 60% of my programmer age (years of experience) waiting for dependencies to install and praying that the 9 kB/s connection I'm struggling with remains alive every single fucking time otherwise I have to start the wait all over. 😡😡😡8
It's Sunday. A day for prayer. Today I am praying that others dont mess up the code base when I get to work on Monday. Amen.2
Not a single time in my life I was able to correctly spell "sudo" on the first shot: I always get "sudp" first. Am I praying the wrong prayers?8
I'm praying for our newly hired Software Architect. Because He sets unrealistic timelines. He said that He will code, but yeah He just said it. Also, praying for our project. Coz it's really doomed!8
I'm the only one who after saying "nah, come on, I will backup it tomorrow, what could happen?", spends the day after by reinstalling Windows (after an awesome crash) and praying that the project he was working on for months is still there?1
Back when I was still in school for comp sci we had an advanced software engineering and design class with c++. At this time, everyone was expected to be proficient enough with cpp to go ahead and properly work with whatever the instructor would throw at us. And pretty much everyone was since past classes included a lot of c++ development. Of course, efficient at least related to academic studies rather than actual real world development.
Our teacher would mix in a lot pf phyisics and mathematics into what we were doing, something that I greatly enjoyed, while at the same time putting real world value concerning cpp best practices to avoid common pitfalls in the development of said language. Since most bugs seemed to be memory based he would be particularly strict about that.
One classmate, good friend and an actual proper developer now a days would ALWAYS forget to free his resources...ALWAYS for whatever fucking reason he would just ignore that shit, regardless of how much the instructor would make a point on it.
At one point during class on a virtual lecture the dude literally addressed a couple of students but when he got to my boy in particular he said: "you are the reason why people are praying to Mozilla and Hoare to release Rust as fast as possible into a suitable alternative to high performant code in C++, WHY won't you pay attention to how you deal with memory management?"
And it stuck with me. I merely a recreational cpp dev, most of my profesional work is done on web development, so I cannot attest to all the additional unsafe code that people encounter in the wild when dealing with cpp on a professional level.
But in terms of them common criticisms of C and C++ for which memory is so important to work with, wouldn't you guys say that it comes more from the side of people just not knowing what they are doing rather than a fault on the language itself?
I see the merits and beauty of Rust, I truly do, it is a fantastic language, with a standardized build system and a lot of good design put into it. But I can't really fathom it being the cpp killer, if anything, the real cpp killers are bad devs that just don't know what they are doing or miss shit.
What do y'all ninjas think?8
Hello! My name is opalqnka and I am a Windows user.
I followed the 12-step program and now I am a step away to being certified LPIC Linux Engineer.
As step 12 preaches, here I humbly share the Program:
1. We admitted we were powerless over Windows - that our lives had become unmanageable.
2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of Linus as we understood Him.
4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
5. Admitted to Linus, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
6. We’re entirely ready to have Linus remove all these defects of character.
7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.
9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
11. Sought through bash scripting and kernel troubleshooting to improve our conscious contact with Linus as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to Windows users and to practice these principles in all our affairs.4
On my last deployment for the musician client I encountered a really nasty bug.
I configured all the settings in my Nginx. Theoretically everything should work, but it did not. Somehow I always ended up landing on my default Nginx page.
After hours of trying to find the typo, turning it off and on again and praying to all gods I ever heard of, I finally analysed my default Nginx config file. Somehow the server config I posted on the clients conf-file got posted beneath the default configs. WTF?
After deleting those everything worked. 🙄2
One project deadline coming up, one presentation to be given next week, and 3 exams on consecutive days.
Scared as fuck. 😭
I hope I pass.
Wish me luck!2
Tldr: no router, almost not work.
Ok I recently moved into a new house, and I signed a contract for an Internet line.
Problem is that the router has been sent at the ISP shop, where I was supposed to get it personally. But guess what? Covid emergency happened two days after, and the shop closed.
So, after spending two days calling customer service of both ISP and Postal office without being able to speak to anybody, I received a Sms saying that the pack was not delivered because the receiver was closed.
After some more unsuccessful calls to the same two entities I managed to find the actual shop's phone number, that was actually thw owner's house (he's working from home). I spoke to him, told the problem, and he changed the router destination to my house.
Today I checked the package status on the postal website and I saw that it seems that they tried every day, at 7:02 am, to deliver the bloody package again at the shop! I truly hope this was a bug on their tracking system. It's weird that the hours were always 7:02am, because the package delivery office opens at 8:30 am, so again I'm praying any existent and non-existent god that that's just a bug. I'm kinda tired of being stuck with my phone hotspot with limited GB and with ISP public routers with about 5Mbps.
I wish I had @netikras skills with router building.4
I totally want to refactor my project's code, but I don't have any time for it and now it's a working piece of spaghetti-ish 😭
I'm just praying I'll get to do it once it's actually finished, so I don't have to work with it again in like a year and want to travel back in time and murder myself.13
Hot reload blows my mind. It's so good, time efficient and beautiful. Why doesn't those pesky doorsaledmen advertise this?
Jehovas witnesses are praying to the wrong God!
So, I'm about to be up shit's Creek. I need a new source of income, ideally either a new job or becoming a freelancer. I have been making intranet sites with ASP.NET for a while now, and I can tell two things:
1. It's too corporate minded, so I'll need a fucking degree
2. It's too corporate minded, so I'll be stuck with people like my boss, who still use tables to align content despite the project having bootstrap.
Basically, I'm anxious, terrified, and unable to figure out what comes next. Do I keep sending job applications and praying to whatever deity will listen, it do I start figuring out this freelance thing? If freelance, then how do I get into it? I'm terrified and desperate.1
What the fuck is this trend of pricing cloud services by the minute? I mean It's fucking great and all that I buy 2 minutes with a sql db but who the fuck actually does that?
After another night working on a server I (strongly) suggest we move our shit to a cloud service. It's cool providing I promise the costs don't rape us blind folded. Seems easy enough, right? Nope it's not.
6 hours later, halfway to becoming a fucking network engineer and I'm more lost than ever.
Seriously can't the fuck AWS and google cloud show a monthly price - even an estimate for generic shit like $x for the average crappy wp blog!
If anyone has some helpful info / experience on the true cost of hosting generic web apps - the retardedly simple app I'm trying to price is:
1 php web application with 150 domains, 3gb mysql db and 30gb ssd.
I gets has 45000 sessions with 250000 page views.
Your help would be greatly appreciated. Currently I'm leaning towards deploying a clone sending 250 000 random requests and praying my $300 cloud platform credit will cover the bill.4
At this point I fucking hate my project. After 3 months I literally can not concentrate, I am just staring on a screen, smashing my hands on the keyboard and praying that it will fucking work without bugs. At this point it still works pretty well. I am so sorry for everyone that will have to work on this after I leave. According to the project leader it should not take more than 20 more hours. Hes a really cool guy, but if he's going to talk optimistically about this fucking project once more I am gonna rape his wife and his dog. Last fucking time he said that its just 2 already implemented features that just need to get connected together, I spent 30 hours rewriting half of the codebase because how inconsistent and shitty the code was. I am not fuckin suprised that we are going to rewrite whole shit from a scratch, because the code is already unmaintainable. Wish me luck, because I really need it to survive another week working on this trash.1
Week starts with awful events:
#reached office late
#my desktop crashed. Had to force boot. (Most probably lost some unsaved codes. Still unaware though)
#realised after sometime that I left my phone in the Cab (had to run in the early morning. got it back. Was an office cab and I knew the cab no.)
Praying for no further events...
I was about to have a screenshare presentation of a month-long work over Skype...
Hours before the presentation I got bored and upgraded from Xorg to Wayland for some reason the universe doesn't want to disclose...
Tried to call a friend to check if everything is working and the screenshare feature was missing! 😑 I thought Skype fucked up, tried Hangouts, still not working, tried praying to saint Ubuntu to somehow please let it work one time. It did fucking not.
My gosh, 30 minutes before the presentation and I was preparing the whole environment on Windows. I had never felt so stressed in my life! 😰
Investigating after the presentation informed me that screensharing only works on XOrg, not on Wayland.
Worst last-minute decision ever. *#-##-:$;"+3($(!#@/)#9"+(2(#2
ughh here i am with an opportunity for a job (in london) and got given 3 programming tasks and my mum is surely praying so i wont get it ,i hear screamingin my head 'Nooooo!' when trying to even think about this third task , ive already done 2 ,
i really need to stop telling her about these london jobs she's witching them away , but what can ya do when i applied to more jobs here and some in manc yet i get through in londan 🤷🏼♀️1
When you get to the stage of just praying that your code will magically fix itself .........
I've been freelancing lately with an agency to develop an android app for their client and at the same time another person is developing the website .
The story begins when I first contacted the web dev to give me access to the database (because he started before me ).It turns out that this guy purchased an almost ready cms template with a shitty data structure that has no relations between object .This database has no primary keys , no foreign keys , no indexes ... no nothing . Adding to that the web dev refused that I rewrite a new data structure claiming that he has done a good progress on the website .
Forward couple of weeks , I managed to create the api and develop an alpha for the app and sent it to the agency manager .
This bastard told me that the website and design have changed and the app shouldn't be like that .He told me to contact the other bastard the web dev to seen what the changes are . I'm waiting for the response about the new updates and I'm praying that they'll be just minor colors updates or something not a whole concept update .
My problem here is I'm stuck with this fucking agency cuz they paid half of the payment when I started .
Damn I must learn to say no to people .1
Oh when you refactor the complete project structure and give for build the first time !!!
It's like you are sitting with your heart on your hand and praying to God that at least let the errors be readable(I am no genius to think I will be able to produce error free code the first time😝😝)
Why is it that I eat 60% of my daily food intake past midnight while I'm coding, anyway? I could sit down for a real meal but nooooo, let's have a leftover sandwich at 1:30am, desperately praying I don't wake anyone else up to see my shame. These projects have thrown off my entire living schedule.1
Anytime anyone asks me where I'm gonna get in life programming, I'm gonna show them the video of Steve Ballmer screaming "DEVELOPERS DEVELOPERS DEVELOPERS DEVELOPERS", only to shortly be followed by wheezing, sweat, and praying for sweet air and mercy...
HOW MUCH DO YOU THINK MICROSOFT WINDOWS IS WORTH?!1
That awesome moment someone accidentally deleted all the Jenkins configs and you're just praying no critical bugs come up...1
Every once a while, I secretly wished AppSync will be equipped with persisted queries and batch queries.
Was I not praying hard enough?
Worked on a project where the variable was public and static, was accessed at multiple locations and across multiple threads and no it wasn't using thread safe implementation. Since then whenever I read public static I start praying the next word be "final".